One of my biggest influences in the realm of personal
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growth has been the work of Carl Rogers, the creator of
person-centered therapy.
There are many things I appreciate about his approach
to and perspectives on personal growth (especially
compared to some of the other prominent figures in the
psychology world), but the number one thing that
draws me to his approach is his humanity and
compassion. He is deeply respectful of our uniqueness,
focuses on potential rather than pathology and leaves a
lot of room within his ideas and frameworks for people
to be individuals and live the ideas in accordance with
who they are.
One of these frameworks, and the one I want to share
this week, is the seven characteristics of the fully-
functioning person, which he writes about in his
excellent book On Becoming a Person. These
characteristics aren’t a state of being we arrive at, but
rather a constant process we are working towards
(Rogers calls this “the good life”—an apt description!).
As you’ll see, these characteristics are more rooted in
philosophy than practical life advice and many of them
are connected. Together, they are all about fulfilling our
human potential and provide a useful overview of
things to pay attention to as we reflect on our daily
experiences.
The 7 Characteristics
1. A growing openness to experience
Having a growing openness to experience is about
moving away from defensiveness. John Gottman
describes defensiveness as: “self-protection in the form
of righteous indignation or innocent victimhood in an
attempt to ward off a perceived attack.” When we
perceive ourselves to be under emotional attack or
criticism, defensiveness usually involves turning the
blame back on the other person or people. With this
characteristic, we are more open to what happens, as it
happens, and are less likely to react in an unconscious,
knee-jerk way.
2. An increasingly existential lifestyle
We tend to filter our experiences through the lens of
what we already believe about ourselves and the world,
usually in a way that confirms these beliefs. When we
adopt what Rogers calls “an increasingly existential
lifestyle,” however, we flip this, allowing our personality
and self-concept to develop based on what we are
experiencing (rather than the other way around).
So what does this look like in practice?
Let’s say someone compliments us on a job well done. If
we filter that compliment through our current belief
system (which happens to be that we’re not very good
at what we’re doing), we might internally dismiss their
comment as them “just being nice” or even throw the
compliment back with a response like “Oh it was
nothing…” But if we allow our experience to inform our
self-concept, we can accept this compliment for what it
is. One of my favourite responses in this kind of
situation comes from Sarah Von Bargen, who suggests
responding with “Thanks! I worked hard at it.
find more suggestions for responding to compliments
with grace and gratitude here.)
Like the previous characteristic, this requires us to
develop a degree of mindfulness and live each moment
fully. What I love about this characteristic is it comes
with a degree of exciting uncertainty. If we open
ourselves up to our moment-by-moment experience,
who knows what’s possible?!
3. Increasing organismic trust
Basically, self-trust. This is about trusting our judgement
and our ability to behave appropriately in any given
situation. At its core, it’s about developing our sense of
values and our own moral compass (rather than
unquestioningly adopting those of the people around
us).
Which leads to…
4. Freedom of choice
When we trust our internal process and our external
behaviour, we develop a greater freedom of choice. We
are aware of the difference between “have to” and
“choose to,” and, because we know we can choose how
we respond in situations, we take responsibility for our
decisions and behaviour. While “control” is a loaded
word, it’s fair to say we have agency over our decisions
and behaviour that leaves us free to be who we are and
act in accordance with our values and own sense of
right and wrong.
Which leads to…
5. Creativity
With the freedom to be ourselves and the self-trust that
underpins this freedom, we are able to be more
creative. As Rogers points out, we can also be more
creative in the way we adapt to our circumstances
without feeling a need to conform to norms and values
that conflict with our own.
6. Reliability and constructiveness
To me, this suggestion is about balancing our inner and
outer worlds. Rogers describes this as being open to all
our needs and able to maintain a balance between
them. His belief is that when people have a congruent
view of themselves (i.e. one in which their self-worth,
self-image and ideal self overlap rather than exist as
separate entities), even aggressive needs are matched
by an intrinsic goodness within the person.
7. A rich full life
Rogers suggests the “fully-functioning” individual
experiences joy and pain, love and heartbreak, fear and
courage more intensely.
This reminds me of what Brené Brown writes about
how we can’t selectively cut ourselves off from certain
experiences: when we numb so-called negative
emotions, we numb everything. Opening ourselves up
to a rich, full life means receiving the full gamut of
human experience—the good, the “bad” and the
challenging.

And this isn’t easy. As Rogers writes in On Becoming a

Person: “This process of the good life is not, I am
convinced, a life for the faint-hearted. It involves the
stretching and growing of becoming more and more of
one’s potentialities. It involves the courage to be. It
means launching oneself fully into the stream of life.”

1. Open to experience: both positive and negative

emotions accepted. Negative feelings are not denied,
but worked through (rather than resort to ego defense
mechanisms).

2. Existential living: in touch with different experiences

as they occur in life, avoiding prejudging and
preconceptions. Being able to live and fully appreciate
the present, not always looking back to the past or
forward to the future (i.e. living for the moment).

3. Trust feelings: feeling, instincts and gut-reactions are

paid attention to and trusted. People’s own decisions
are the right ones and we should trust ourselves to
make the right choices.

4. Creativity: creative thinking and risk taking are

features of a person’s life. Person does not play safe all
the time. This involves the ability to adjust and change
and seek new experiences.

5. Fulfilled life: person is happy and satisfied with life,

and always looking for new challenges and
experiences.”(McLeod, Saul)

“Rogers' personality theory is the notion of self or self-

concept. This is defined as "the organized, consistent
set of perceptions and beliefs about oneself".(McLeod,
Saul) The self is considered our personalities. Rogers
believed that our personalities are based off of our
experiences, childhood experiences, and evaluation by
others. According to Rogers, we all want to feel self-
worth. So we will act and behave in a way that reflects
our personalities. He believed we would all interact and
behave as our ideal self or who we think we
are.ReferenceMcLeod, S. (2007, January 1). Carl Rogers.
Retrieved August 19, 2014, from