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so hard so insensitive and sometimes the lady will come up to me and say it is so difficult to
tolerate the idiosyncrasies of my husband speaking of the nose of biting of the nails at other
times grown-ups will come to me and tell me how it is extremely difficult to handle the
unsophisticated behavior of their simple parents in an urban setting social gatherings parties
and at other times parents will come up to me and tell me and they feel so pained by how their
children control every aspect of their lives I'm sure many of you watching this video are relating
to what I'm trying to say when people come to me and talk to me about these kind of issues and
relationships I tell them a story there was a group of porcupines who lived in a forest on the
outskirts of small town one year during the winter temperatures dropped 20 degrees below zero
minus 20 degrees Celsius all of the porcupines gathered together to discuss ways to discuss a
strategy to survive the winter as they came together they realized the temperatures of their
bodies put together had created a warmth they felt hopeful and they can now survive this cold
winter there was a problem however porcupines have this sharp poking quills and each
porcupine can have as many as 30,000 quills whilst they were all together each of their quills
were poking someone else in the group one of the porcupines just couldn't handle this he said I
cannot tolerate this any longer and left the group as this porcupine was now alone in the forest
reality dawned upon him that he cannot tolerate this cold winter alone he had a choice be
uncomfortable together tolerating some of the sharp poking of the Quinns of the other
porcupines but survived the winter based on the warmth or to be alone and comfortable and
died are the cold frigid winter the porcupine returned back to the group and as he entered and
huddled into the group he experienced the Warped and survived the winter in our relationships
as well is always a package deal we can experience the warmth of meaningful loving
relationships but that warmth of love come with another dimension as well the sharp poking of
the quills digging of the nose insensitive speech unsophisticated behavior next time when you're
being poked by the sharp quills of your spouse your parent you siblings your colleagues or your
friends just remember the story of the porcupines and make your choice you can either get the
warmth of love and will have to tolerate some poking of the quills or you can comfortably be
alone by yourself and miss out on the most amazing deep bondings and the warmth of love the