“A

Declaration of RENTERS’ RIGHTS”

“When in the Course of URBAN LIVING it becomes necessary for ONE TENANT TO
END THE LEASE ON THE APARTMENT HE HAS RENTED FOR THE PAST SIX YEARS AND
TO ASSUME AMONG THE POWERS OF HIS COMMON SENSE THE SEPARATE AND
EQUAL PLACE OF LODGING, a decent respect to the opinions of RESIDENTS
EVERYWHERE requires that HE should declare the causes which IMPEL HIM TO THE
SEPARATION.”

“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that ALL TENANTS ARE OVERPAYING, that
THEY ARE ENDOWED BY THE RENT CONTROL BOARD WITH CERTAIN UNALIENABLE
RIGHTS, that AMONG THESE ARE PEACE, QUIET, AND THE PURSUIT OF A GOOD
NIGHT’S SLEEP. The history of THE PRESENT LANDLORD AT 123 MERRYGROVE LANE
is a history of REPEATED RENT INCREASES AND NEGLEGENCES. To prove this, let Facts
be submitted to a candid world.”

HE HAS FAILED TO REPAIR WINDOWS THAT WERE FIRST INSTALLED IN THE

YEAR 197O.

HE HAS TAKEN AWAY THE PARKING SPACE NEXT TO THE ELEVATOR AND
REPLACED IT WITH ONE NEXT TO THE LAUNDRY ROOM.

HE HAS IGNORED THE MOLD PROBLEM IN THE SHOWER

HE HAS RENTED TO TENANTS WHO ARE LOUD AND ABUSIVE TO THEIR

SPOUSES

HE HAS ONLY ON THE QUINQUENNIAL CLEANED THE RUGS IN THE COMMON

HALLWAY LEAVING THEM BROWN AND STAINED

HE HAS FAILED TO REPLACE A DRYER THAT BURNS ONE’S CLOTHES

HE HAS IGNORED EMAILS REGARDING THE CINDER BLOCK WALLS IN THE

GARAGE THAT LEAK WATER WHEN IT RAINS

HE HAS CAUSED US TO SEND PAPER CHECKS WHEN OTHER ELECTRONIC

MEANS ARE AVAILABLE, THUS MAKING IT DIFFICULT, INCONVENIENT, AND
UNGUARANTEED THAT THE RENT WILL ARRIVE ON TIME

HE HAS INCREASED RENT FOR SPOUSES

HE HAS HIRED A REPAIRMAN WHO HAS ABSOLUTELY NO SYSTEM IN PLACE

TO GET THINGS FIXED AND OFTEN REQUIRES TWO OR THREE OR FOUR
EMAILS TO EVEN RESPOND

HE HAS PROFITED OFF OF HUNDREDS OF OTHER TENANTS SO THAT HE CAN

DRIVE AROUND IN HIS TESLA AND LIVE IN A TEN MILLION DOLLAR HOUSE IN
BRENTWOOD.

“In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble
terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A LAWYER,
 whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a SLUMLORD, is unfit to
be OWNER OF A RENTAL PROPERTY.”

“We, therefore, the TENANTS OF 123 MERRYGROVE LANE assembled, appealing to

RENT CONTROL BOARD, do, in the Name, and by Authority of THE HARD-WORKING
TENANTS OF LOS ANGELES, solemnly publish and declare, That these MONTHLY
PAYMENTS are, and of Right ought to be WAIVED, that TENANTS be Absolved from all
Allegiance to LANDHOLDERS EVERYWHERE, and that all …connection between them
and THE LANDLORD, is and ought to be totally dissolved. And for the support of this
Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of Divine Providence, we mutually
pledge to each other our RENT INCREASES, our PARKING SPOTS, and our
APARTMENTS.