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The Injury of Fury

~~**This poem is super long, but it took me hours to write. I hope you all enjoy reading this as I have
enjoyed writing it wholeheartedly.**~~

Awful anger expressed in verses

Didn’t give me blessings, but curses

I’m genuinely depressed for letting you down all year round

Don’t wanna be candidly blind like a sick, wandering hound

Happiness is what I need to rehearse

It will be peace to this sad, dark verse

I don’t feel like a strong, mighty knight,

Always fearful to take flight at night

Now, I’m the lonely fool for not making wise decisions

Right now, I wanna make a change to fulfill some missions

In my mind…in your eyes…

In my soul, there’s no lies

You are playing me like a game these days

But, I will tame the terrible tiger that is inside me

I am displaying distress in so many ways

And I don’t mean to act so cowardly and franticly

Afraid to lose control so suddenly

The atmosphere is cool momentarily

At least no one is invading my personal space

Looking forward to achieving grandeur grace

Is there any hopeful bliss to search for

Or am I left to forlorn for you some more?

Is there any good luck for me in store?

My eyes should be to the sky instead of the floor…

Wash away the tears, flowing so rapidly from my eyes

Push away the fears, growing in my panicked heart as time flies

Understand where I am coming from and what I’ve been through

I’ve been going through bipolar manias for many years and all is true

Do you really wanna know why?

There’s times when I want to live or die

I wanna explain what’s going on

I’m just hoping you won’t be gone

Picked on by passive aggressive behavior I’ve viewed in the past

Alas, I’ve learned that peacefulness in chaos doesn’t last

I’ve fallen for the lies of your cries…I’ve grown stronger ever since…

I found myself in the rubble of your goodbyes and seeking His deliverance

I’m embracing alienated ambition little by little

If only my somnolent bones can be less brittle

Forgiveness will be replaced with resentment sooner or later…

I’m like the salt and sand of the sea, flowing and churning in a beautiful blur

Virtuous humility will crown my head of bottled-up dread

It feels like an eternity to be driven by compassionate determination

I can’t go on any further when my blotched feet feel like lead

Vigorous madness and frustration zip through my veins of lamentation

There’s no reason I should sit here and mope

There’s gotta be a reason to stand up and have hope

There’s no need to be trapped in shameful solitude’s sphere

I want to believe and have faith in brighter days without any fear

I want to mourn in delightful joy

I don’t want to be angry anymore

I want to be a happy-go-lucky boy

I don’t want to be a closed door

I want to be an open door of opportunities for everyone around me

I don’t want this hostile rage or discomfort to wrap itself around me

I’m willing to be set free from the captivity I’ve put myself in

I’m in desperate need of an optimistic outlook from within

Your echoing empathy leaves me no reflection of disheartening fear in this mirror

I have allowed myself to rise and fall like my failures and successes I hold so dear
I dodged the bullets of never-ending negativity that wants me to fall into temptation

Envious sorrow and hopeless irritation will not upset me with inner aggravation

I will not let nightfall chase away my confident stride

I will not allow doubt and grief to make me cower and hide

I will be courageous through the storms of tribulation

I will shake off the tension and be full of anticipation

Encouragement expressed in verses

Did give me blessings, not curses

I’m genuinely delighted to have sought You in times of trouble and assumption

Don’t wanna be falling in the same traps of worthless corruption

Distress, in general, is what I need to let go of

If I could be simply glad in Your land of Love,

I would feel like a strong, mighty knight,

Always resilient and faithful, fighting the good fight

Now, I’m growing wiser and braver for choosing His narrow path

Eventually, I will be rid of all guiltiness from past sins, so I won’t face His wrath

In His loving heart, He is absolutely merciful

To those who repent from being so resentful

In His eyes of truth and passion,

He knows that I will gain compassion

After I go through the rollercoaster of life…

Peace, He will grant you and I if we discard strife

I want to mourn in delightful joy

I don’t want to be angry anymore

I want to be a happy-go-lucky boy

I don’t want to be a closed door

In your mind…in my eyes…

In His soul, there’s no lies

Sometimes, living this life can be maddening to the core

The fire of desire ire has scorched me aflame not too long ago

Other times, living this life has its positive effects that I adore

You know, the snow that sparkles aglow is in our soul as a whole –

It is like a single snowflake,

Transforming into crushed coal

Please don’t cry me a lake…

Let the emotions take its toll

Melt away the walls of wrath between us

Trust is like dust, which withers away

Shelter us in the shadows of our eustress

Lust must vanish or it will lead us astray

The madness and sadness will not be the end of us

Happiness and gladness will be the beginning of us

I’m genuinely relieved that God hasn’t left you and I in grief

Our actions and sentiments along with it is but a leaf

I’ve been restless and these ups and downs I feel emotionally

Don’t benefit you or me in any way

You’ve been dreaming of me through thick and thin fervently

I pray you don’t ever deny it any day

Listen to the consoling whispers of the breeze

Do you smell the smoke of my passion at ease?

Are you in tune with the rhythm of my heart beats?

In my masculine chest (which yearns for perseverance),

It beats for you and you alone as it resonates, radiates and repeats

I know this is God’s test and I will be receiving reverence

The fire of our desire ire has been put out by the Lord…

Our decadent emotions is what we shouldn’t hoard

The wall of our wrath must be demolished completely

Our saturated souls has been transformed tremendously

We are like a gleam of a stream compared to God, who is a sparkling lake

I know that the feelings we had put our lives and other lives at stake

But…look at life in my perspective – sometimes, it takes deleting our history

To drive into the rocky road of recovery…He will heal our injury of fury
He forgives us for our transgressions

He is merciful and wants us to be guilty no more

He appreciates you and I’s confessions

He promises us that our life will be an open door

Opportunities of shameless joy awaits us

But, first, we are like school kids in the bus,

Heading for a destination that is full of surprises

That won’t reduce us to anger with its dainty devices

Copyright © J.W. Earnings | Year Posted 2017