Sex

Tips For Men: From Controlling

Erectile Dysfunction and Premature
Ejaculation to Understanding Female
Sexuality
PLAYER MASTERMIND
WWW.PLAYERMASTERMIND.COM
PLAYERMASTERMINDSERIES@GMAIL.COM

Copyright © 2016 Player Mastermind

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system or
transmitted, in any form or by any means, without the prior written permission of the author, nor be
otherwise circulated in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a
similar condition being imposed on the purchaser.

The explanations in this book are provided for information purposes only. The Information is not intended
to be and does not constitute advice, is general in nature and not specific to you. It is provided for your
information and entertainment only. By reading on you confirm that you understand this and accept
responsibility for your own life. Before any change to your lifestyle habits you should seek the advice of
qualified and registered therapists, trainers, nutritionists, health professionals and legal advisors as
appropriate and undertake your own due diligence. None of the information in any of the PM volumes is
intended as relationship advice, legal advice, or health/medical advice. PM is not responsible for any
decisions made or any action taken by you. You are responsible for your own choices and should undertake
research into relevant laws in your country or state before contemplating any kind of relationship, sexual or
otherwise.

Cover image: mocker/Bigstock.com

ISBN-13:
978-1533253842

ISBN-10:
1533253846

CONTENTS



1 INTRODUCTION: THE VITAL ROLE 1
OF SEX FOR THE PLAYER

2 MALE MINDSET AND MENTAL 5

TECHNIQUES FOR PERFORMANCE
3 STAMINA TRAINING 15
4 SEX POSITIONS 21
5 REVEALING FEMALE SEXUAL 28
NATURE
6 RELATIONSHIP SEXUAL DYNAMICS 40
7 FEMALE ANATOMY AND ORGASMS 45
8 SQUIRTING ORGASMS 53
9 ANAL SEX 60
10 HELPING HER TO PLEASE YOU 69

11 SEX TOYS 74
12 DIRTY TALK AND REMOTE 81
AROUSAL
13 SEXUAL HEALTH PROTOCOLS 93
14 RECOMMENDED PRODUCTS AND 98
RESOURCES





1 INTRODUCTION: THE VITAL ROLE OF SEX FOR
THE PLAYER


Sexual performance is a topic joked about, hinted at, and privately contemplated
by lots of men, whether they are in relationships or single. In the most
unfortunate cases, it is the anxieties or uncertainties around sex itself which can
prevent a man from having the requisite self-assurance to even initiate
interactions with women. To compound the problem, not all of the information
available on such topics is really suitable for a man looking to improve his
sexual performance and repertoire.

Information ranges from the too-clinical to the too-politically-correct in the main
and almost always neglects an explanation of the psychological factors of sexual
enjoyment and pleasure’s inextricable link to the overall dynamics of the given
relationship.

In all of my books, I concentrate on all of the vital components of living an
unrestrained player lifestyle but the information here will be also be of some use
to those who choose to pursue more committed or traditional relationship forms.

Another difficulty is that some people subscribe to the notion that good sex
cannot be taught effectively. I disagree with this. I certainly agree that there’s no
substitute for experience but that also applies to approaching women in the first
place, maintaining any kind of relationship, and indeed most things in life. I urge
you to accumulate as much experience as you can on your way to mastering your
sex life but equally I recommend that you immerse yourself in the right
resources like this book and my recommended resources later on in order to have
a vision of where you’re headed and some amazing techniques that you can
implement straight away.

You will find if you peruse books and articles about sex that much of the advice
is not realistic enough for real life and shies away from laying matters out
explicitly and uncompromisingly.

No amount of being attentive to your lover, trying specific ‘moves’ (although
there are some good ones that I will outline for you later on), or doing Kegel
exercises will address your overall thoughts about sexuality or the basic level of
arousal on your part and her part which is required for amazing sex. Much of
your sexual enjoyment will also rely on your attitude to the whole thing. For that
reason, I frequently choose to use the colloquial or ‘dirty’ terms for sexual acts
or organs throughout this book. My aim is to normalise all of this for you as you
consider the explanations and examples and to chip away at any prudishness or
restraint that you may still harbour and may be holding you back.

Sex is the arena in which exciting chemistry plays out and the glue that binds a
casual relationship together. In my other books such as MGTOW Player and
Gold Diggers and Sugar Daddies I outline the different reasons that a woman
will continue to interact with a man and I recommend that the most pleasant for
you in the long term will be to solely or at least primarily provide the benefit of
good sex to a woman. To put it at bluntly as I can so that there will be no
confusion: if all you’re offering is fucking, your fucking had better be totally on
point otherwise the relationship is not going to work for very long and there’s
going to be a long queue of men behind you eager to fulfil the sexual role in
your place for her.

I say all of this with caution. It is not my aim to put more pressure on men
reading this and create more performance anxieties; pressure and performance
anxiety can be the undoing of your basic sexual confidence.

In addition to the maintenance of the sexual relationship, stellar fucking ability
helps you immeasurably on the front end of your romantic pursuits. Knowing
with clear real world proof that you have the knowledge, experience and ability
to really lay it down fuels a confident approach when you’re out meeting women
in the first place. It’s something that after a while you will tend to naturally
exude along with being more propelled to take your chances in the first place
because you feel that you really have something good to offer without resorting
to the kind of supplication and pandering that sadly become typical when men
are too eager to get laid.

Sexual mastery is so crucial in your whole game that in some cases it can even
lead to getting women referred to you for sex. I show several examples of this in
the Sex Confessions books. Change your mindset, stick to the techniques, fuck as
much as you can, and remain open and honest in your relationships and this can
be you too.

Do not be discouraged if your study and efforts do not overhaul your sex life
overnight. There are a lot of aspects of your beliefs you may need to adjust,
perhaps a variety of sexually related insecurities that you will need to overcome,
and no end of different skills to learn. In this book I will set you on the right
track to a new understanding of arousal and pleasure and introduce a variety of
techniques that will give you inspiration to keep experimenting and enjoying sex
as one of the most amazing facets of life..

2 MALE MINDSET AND MENTAL TECHNIQUES
FOR PERFORMANCE



Beginning with the foundations we need to examine what’s going on with you
when you are on your own, before any partners enter the picture. Specifically
you need to examine and optimise what’s going on in your own mind. This
chapter is all about you. Whether you experience erectile dysfunction (ED) or
not, I strongly suggest that you do not skip over any of the material in this
chapter because complete control and reliability of erection can usually be
improved on, leading on to the possibilities of group sex and extreme
exhibitionism that I like to talk about.

The male mind is plagued with all sorts of faulty beliefs and insecurities that left
to fester can turn into major blockers to your sexual performance and ultimately
undermine your overall personal happiness. Let’s weed them out one by one.

I didn’t begin with the level of sexual confidence that I enjoy consistently now.
When I was younger I had doubts and uncertainties that I have ironed out as I
have grown up, gained experience and reflected on those experiences. I want
other men to progress in the same fashion and become more comfortable with
their own sexual attributes and proclivities.

Men often worry about their looks, height, wealth or social standing but one of
the most unpleasant insecurities to suffer is concern over penis size. It is a
persistent anxiety in our culture. In fact, the industry and community
surrounding dubious penis enlargement methods is much bigger than the
seduction community and overall forums for men’s issues. Reflect on how
farcical that is for a moment. The interest and efforts towards increasing the size
of the penis are greater than the interest and efforts towards the direct
investigation of the relevance of penis size and actually getting to use your dick
for mutual pleasure.

Anyone who’s ever opened an email account will likely have been sent spam
relating to making your cock bigger. There are forums dedicated to methods of
stretching your dick that enjoy far greater memberships and readerships than the
biggest seduction forums. To me that is indicative of widespread insecurity and
confusion that needs to be addressed. In his book Stand by Your Manhood, Peter
Lloyd discusses this issue and puts it into its correct context.

The real end goal should not be making your dick longer or fatter and
jeopardising your health and sexual function in the process. The goal should be
to understand the matter dispassionately and come to an acceptance of what
you’ve got.

The fact is that most men’s dicks fall into a normal range with extremes at either
end outside of the typical distribution. If you are particularly small, this needn’t
ruin your sex live because it is not the true basis of your manhood and there is
plenty else you can do sexually which may be much more interesting than
waving a big dick around. If you are particularly large, there are ways that you
can capitalise on having this physical attribute but there are challenges that you
will face that mean that the situation is not entirely without its problems and so
for everyone else having a bigger dick isn’t necessarily something to want or
strive for.

Women often don’t help the situation. They’re smart enough to know that often
the male ego and self-image is firmly attached to penis size. That being the case,
they have a sure-fire way of making a man feel happy by praising his size or
knocking him back by deriding it or undermining him with certain comments on
the topic. You do not want to be beholden to a woman’s praises or denigrations
on something like this.

A lot of the anxiety is fuelled by not really knowing the true about what other
men’s dicks are like or how important it really is. If you really want to get a true
unbiased measure of how you compare without the bullshit or dubious surveys,
put yourself in the situations of group sex that I discuss in my other books and
you will see for real where you’re at and whether it’s really the most significant
thing. Everything else is opinion and speculation, not to mention the ludicrously
inflated measurements quoted in advertising for porn to encourage the
customers’ fetish.

A bigger penis is desirable to plenty of women and a curiosity to many more.
There’s no point trying to deny this situation. However, I have known plenty of
situations in which a man with a really big dick has come into problems with
women not enjoying it, asking him to stop, and discomfort with all condoms.
More important is the sum total of your sexual attributes and expertise.
Additionally, when it comes to penis size specifically, the issue is more one of
compatibility. Really, this has been known since antiquity as it is explained in
these terms in the Kama Sutra but somewhere since then we lost our way. Peter
Lloyd in his book points out that the worry of your dick being too small
shouldn’t be something that you’re saddled with any more than a woman
worrying about if her pussy is tight enough. As it happens, vaginal rejuvenation
operations are a growing trend in cosmetic surgery. Equally, that’s a real shame. I
would offer the same basic advice to a woman. The real solution is self-
acceptance and compatibility just like the Kama Sutra says, not sheer size or
tightness.

I’m not saying all of this as useless feel-good consolation. The reason I want to
push this point is due to the fact that performance is much more important than
any of this, and as sexual performance is primarily a mental game, you’ll never
reach your potential if you’re somehow ashamed of your body or sexual self.

You need to be proud of your dick. Treat it with respect and it’ll work well for
you when you need it. Your cock is just as ideally made for fucking the shit out
of women as your jaw and teeth are for chewing or your legs are for walking.
Never forget that and reread the preceding paragraphs if you are finding it
difficult to unlearn all the bullshit out there about this kind of thing.

Once you’ve totally accepted this, you’ll have one less thing getting in the way
of strong erectile performance.

Similar to size, there are a number of stigmas related to ‘getting it up’ that you
need to reframe to set the foundation of sorting out the problem. Like with penis
size, there’s a pernicious culture surrounding hardness or impotence. Now, don’t
get me wrong, you having a really hard cock is definitely something that I want
you and your partners to enjoy together, but once again the first step is getting
your mind straight so that you can allow that to happen and build on the
foundation.

The key is to not personally identify with the hardness of your dick or otherwise.
If there’s an issue with getting or maintaining an erection you have to simply
view it like you would with any other temporary undesired issue with your body.
Having breathing difficulties doesn’t make you any less of a man and neither
does having your cock less hard less often. The confusion comes from the fact
that your genitalia are the most obvious physical characteristic of your sex. The
temptation then is to then feel anxious, less confident and less manly when these
organs do not work as you would ideally wish them to. Understand this and work
towards letting go of such identifications. If you’ve got a Y-chromosome you’re
part of the boys’ club as far as I’m concerned and as such I want to help you get
everything in your head right to maximise your sex life.

The next major breakthrough for erections is understanding focus and how to
develop a mind-dick connection that allows you to get hard even under unusual
conditions with lots of people watching.

It is true that general health can improve circulation which then assists with a
strong erection, but it is my experience and opinion that it’s more of a mental
understanding and skill. My approach to general health (as discussed in
Bodybuilding and Get Ripped!) has a more physique-enhancing focus.
Enhancing the appeal of the body is absolutely something that can be achieved
with physical efforts and exercise, but male sexual performance is much more in
the mind.

Allow me to introduce a quick interactive exercise which will assist me in
explaining how to learn to mentally take control of your sexual performance…

As you read this text you become aware of your eyes. You can feel the lids as
you blink and as you take in the next things that I’m saying, those things can
direct your attention to different sensations elsewhere. You become aware of the
feeling of your mouth below as I mention it and then the feeling of the clothes
that you’re wearing, just as soon as I mention it and it directs your awareness to
those things that you were previously temporarily oblivious to.

While reading the above paragraph, you were temporarily unaware of other
sensations elsewhere such as in your feet because your attention was elsewhere.
Now, of course, you become aware of exactly what your feet feel like but before
you were completely unaware of them and only would have been aware of how
they feel if you had dropped something on them because your attention was
focussed elsewhere.

What I hope to have shown in the preceding exercise is that the feelings in the
body at any particular time are very much the product of your mind and how
thoughts can be directed by language.

One of the most frivolous and fun applications of this realisation is what you can
do with your dick in terms of its hardness. A strong erection, even under highly
distracting circumstances, can be produced and maintained by mastery of
language techniques and mental focus.

When a thought or conversation takes its form in language, it is very difficult to
process that language, understand it, and interact with it while simultaneously
processing another in-depth thought.

Barring any solely physical dysfunction, an erection will come and stay when
you are completely immersed in something that is highly arousing to you and
undistracted by anything else. Language is an excellent tool for directing this
immersion and blocking out anything else that may be distracting or not helping
you be ‘in the moment’.

The mental method that I advise for getting hard at any time is to formulate the
thoughts of what’s turning you on in your head, putting them in the structure of
language as if you were talking dirty to yourself without actually vocalising the
sentences. This works amazingly well, even with loads of distractions and
outside pressure. Top male porn stars and escorts are masters of this connection
between the mind and cock and with practice of this internal dialogue technique
you can master anytime performance as well.

In my Sex Confessions books I discuss situations in which I have fucked up to
five girls at once with up to fifty people watching. Lights on, music pumping,
me naked and everyone watching still fully clothed. That’s a real test of getting
hard when it counts. In Threesomes, Sex Parties, and BDSM and Friends With
Benefits I explain how to get into these kind of situations but my observation is
that most men can’t rise to the challenge (so to speak) when they get there. I
admire porn stars that can give a woman a serious fucking with all those cameras
up around them and crew on set. You’re absolutely not more of a man if you can
do it remember, but it’s a wicked skill that is completely learnable.

Practice this internal dialogue method on your own first and you’ll find that it’s
much easier when you’ve got a partner with you as well, where those words in
your head are more easily able to latch onto something real.

Now, this is much easier if you already exploit the possibilities of talking dirty
with your partners, have phone sex, or read erotica. I will discuss these topics in
detail later on, but for now let’s take a simple example.

Say you’re with a new partner and for whatever reason you are feeling distracted
and your dick is slow to move in response to the foreplay beginning.
Incidentally, this exact situation isn’t usually talked about by men because of
shame but it’s pretty common…

She’s kissing you and starting to get undressed. You begin to take your shirt off
and lick her neck. She’s really hot and you like the look of her body as you start
to get her bra undone but you’re not as hard as you want to be yet…

In this scenario, you might talk to yourself in your head as follows:
‘Mmm, her skin feels really good and yeah that bra is feeling full to breaking
before I take it off… I’m going to lick between those tits and fuck them… I’ll
have her lick the tip of my cock as I fuck in between her tits and watch her
fingering herself. Loving the long hair too… I’ll get a big fistful of it and pull on
it while I’m fucking her from behind… I wonder how hard I’ll cum inside her
when I’m done fucking her little pussy… I want to lie back and watch her
looking up at me while she’s sucking my cock, slapping it against her tongue and
taking it right in her fucking throat. Soon I’ll have my hands all over her ass -
feeling it in my hands and wondering whether I want to lick her in between
fucking in there…’

It’s your own thoughts so be as dirty as you like and circle through a dialogue of
what specifically turns you on. I went fairly generic for the example because I
don’t know you personally but from all my previous practice even typing that
example made me start to get hard.

When you do this repeatedly, either on your own as a prelude to masturbation or
with a partner to amplify your concentration and subsequent sensations, you
build up the connection between your mind and your dick and gain increasingly
powerful control of your erections. When you try this properly you’ll find that it
is very hard to worry about anything else or be put off by distractions in the
environment.

The better you get with this, the more you’ll get used to still performing under
pressure and strong erections will come very naturally.

In the past I’ve found that music playing that I find irritating can stop me from
feeling totally in the moment and potentially weaken my erection. I’d personally
rather hear the squelching of a woman’s pussy really wet and the sound of my
balls crashing against her A-hole than listen to the kind of RnB garbage that
passes for popular music these days! In that scenario this is a technique I can use
but it really comes into its own when you’ve got a lot of distractions, several
women on you and a lot of people watching that you may initially feel more self-
conscious in front of.

Cycle through the thoughts in your head that work for you, putting them into
words in your head as if you were speaking them (but without the speaking out
loud). You will find once you try this a few times that it’s very difficult to let any
other distracting thought in which will take you out of the horny state. It’s easier
than it sounds and when you master it you will find that even environmental
distractions have a diminished effect on your concentration and performance.
Being more ‘in the moment’ as a result will tend to make your sex more
passionate and enjoyable even if you aren’t applying this technique for an
erection-control purpose.

This technique helped me to perform in some of the more public situations that I
describe in the Sex Confessions books. I strongly recommend that you try these
things as a first port of call before thinking that there is a physical problem that
is stopping your erections. If it is a persistent problem you ought to seek medical
help but I strongly believe that the primary determinant of this area of
performance is psychological and that explanations and advice along these lines
is lacking, just like in other areas of sex.

3 STAMINA TRAINING




Having discussed the basics of the penis and mental control, another
fundamental that can be trained effectively is stamina. A common term for
undesirable results in lasting before you orgasm and ejaculate is ‘premature
ejaculation’. There isn’t a precise duration of time that’s ‘too quick’ because
people prefer to fuck for different lengths of time on different occasions and
plenty of people enjoy a ‘quickie’ when the mood or circumstances call for it.
My definition of premature ejaculation is regularly coming sooner than you
would like and having very little control over your penis.

Similarly to issues of the penis itself and its hardness, there is a strong
psychological element to improving results in this area. Put simply, if you worry
that you are going to come too quickly then you probably will. If the only thing
on your mind is that you’re going to totally plough her for as long as want and
you never doubt that, then you’re likely to have exactly those results. The catch
is that obviously it’s very difficult to believe the latter if that kind of
performance hasn’t been displayed in all of your recent encounters. However,
unlike issues of hardness, the stamina is something that can be trained for more
physically without worrying about the getting into a frame of mind that’s
difficult to take on until you have the positive results.

There are several ways that you can physically prepare for and develop
impressive stamina. The first is repeated exposure. The more you have sex the
less likely you are to experience issues of coming sooner than you would like.
This is why premature ejaculation is more of an issue in cases where the man
hasn’t gotten any for a significant period of time or generally in younger men
that haven’t got used to the superior sensation of actual sex yet.

It does not matter if regular sex is not something that you can count on at the
present time, there are some techniques that can be practiced on your own which
will be beneficial to have mastered once you are with partners. A product that I
recommend is the Fleshlight; a fairly adequate substitute for the feeling of the
inside of a pussy. This is one of many skin-like male sex toys that you can find
in sex shops or online that feel as close to the real thing as you can get when
playing solo. If you pick up a product like this, you’d be best to take the inner
skin-like part of the Fleshlight (or equivalent if you’re using something else) and
soak it in a sink of warm water and line it with a couple of drops of lube before
using it. This is worth doing if you’re not with a partner at the moment and I can
say that such products are enjoyable in their own right.

If on the other hand you do have at least one partner to have sex with at the
moment, it would be best to simply have more sex. The more you have it and the
more you have it without much of a break, the quicker you will acclimatise to
the feeling and be closer to being able to hold on at will.

Often men that have the issue of coming sooner than they would wish are also
able to become aroused again and quickly after orgasming and ejaculating the
first time. In that case, you’re best to just ‘own it’ when you come quickly on the
first round, have no embarrassment, and just get into round two as soon as you
can. She’s having the full session anyway, just in two or more parts. Chances are
that if you don’t act like there’s any issue with this then she won’t care either.
Getting into sexual habits like this will quickly give you more sex and that’s
exactly the acclimatisation that you need.

Aside from these exposure-based methods of building up your stamina for
marathon sessions when required, the more advanced method of building
stamina is to learn the pleasures of male multiple orgasm through learning how
to have one or more non-ejaculatory orgasms.

The most typical male sexual response is to become aroused, develop an
erection, feel heightened pleasure which peaks in orgasm which triggers
ejaculation and then fairly quickly after that experience a drop in desire and a
need to go through a ‘refractory period’ of ‘resetting’ before you’re good to go
again. This is the kind of progression documented by early sexologists Masters
and Johnson in Human Sexual Response. I have already pointed out that in
young men and other lucky ones, the refractory period may be quite short. More
interesting is that if you can orgasm without ejaculating, there does not seem to
be any refractory period at all.

Masters and Johnson researched and documented the typical but did not instruct
on the possible. There’s erection, orgasm, and ejaculation. They typically
accompany each other, but they can all come apart. For our purposes I don’t
suggest that we think to separate out the erection, but there is huge value in
separating the orgasm and the ejaculation.

You can find information on this if you look for ‘male multiple orgasm’ or ‘non-
ejaculatory orgasm’. A popular and interesting book on the subject is The Multi-
Orgasmic Man by Mantak Chia. What you will find is a great deal of
unnecessary confusion on the topic unfortunately though. You really don’t have
to worry about breathing techniques, ‘energies’, ‘chakras’, or any kind of other
new-agey sounding stuff. It doesn’t matter if you’re put off by all that kind of
thing; it’s not to my interest either. I’m more the kind of person that if something
sounds fun and isn’t dangerous, I’ll try it. What I can tell you is that non-
ejaculatory multiple orgasms are something that can be learned with just
practice. It’s just something that your body can learn to do, just like you learn to
walk and talk or anything else just by trying it a load of times, mostly getting it
wrong, and then gradually getting the hang of it.

Male multiple orgasms are sometimes thought to be quite advanced but really
they’re not. The great secret is that there’s no secret. It’s something that you have
to try until eventually it works more often than not.

First of all you can try paying more attention to the build up to orgasm when you
masturbate. I discuss masturbation because there’s far more that you can learn
from it than most men realise. It’s all too easy to get into the habit of doing it
fairly quickly to a bit of hardcore porn. While this is enjoyable, you’re
neglecting to learn the things that will provide you and your partners with more
pleasure in the long run.

When you wank off, start by taking yourself as close as you can to the beginning
of orgasm without entering that orgasm. Let the pleasure subside without having
the orgasm. Do this again and again, getting closer to that ‘point of no return’
where orgasm is inevitable each time before you subside. Eventually try to go
past that point of no return and ‘steal’ the orgasm without letting your semen go.
This is something that you just have to try. It feels a bit like clenching your
pelvic floor muscles but it’s subtle.

It is likely that the first few times you try this, you’ll blow it and ejaculate soon
after the orgasm you made commences. This is normal and it doesn’t matter; you
just try again when you feel like it. Eventually you’ll manage to take yourself to
the orgasm without letting the cum go. You’ll be amazed and you should be
encouraged that this is something that you can learn to do consistently, if you
wish to. You will notice that once you’ve had this non-ejaculatory orgasm, your
desire and erection don’t decrease in the same way that you normally would
when orgasming with ejaculation. When you manage your first orgasm without
ejaculating, go ahead and continue jerking off until you orgasm and shoot at the
same time. Voila! You just had multiple orgasms thanks to the non-ejaculatory
orgasm.
It may be that even after the first multiple orgasm you have through this method,
it remains something that you can only manage sometimes. That’s alright. It’s
something that after a little while of practicing you can gain increased ability in.
There’s certainly worse things you could be doing than jerking off.

Once you have some control of coming without ejaculating, it is relatively
simple to do the same through having sex rather than from self-pleasure. When
you can do this, you can incorporate this into some of your longer sex sessions.
Some women find it arousing and flattering to see you orgasm twice or more
with her in one go and if you like marathon sessions in the sack you may find
that the multiple orgasms become one of your favourite ways of having more
passionate sex.

It is also possible to have more than one ejaculatory orgasm from the same
erection in the same session without a break. In my case I can experience this if I
try to do it and if I am especially aroused but I experience a reduction in the
desire to go again immediately which I do not have, and other men also report
not experiencing, when they have the non-ejaculatory form of multiple orgasm.
For that reason, trying again in this method (having let myself ejaculate with
orgasm the first time round) is not my preferred way of having an extended
multi-orgasmic session; I have to be especially aroused and fight the temptation
of taking a rest and allowing my erection to go down.




4 SEX POSITIONS



In addition to methods of increased exposure, practice, and non-ejaculatory
orgasms, certain positions can be much more useful than others for lasting
during penetration. When you feel that you are coming close to the start of
orgasm and if you want to hold off, transitioning into a position that reduces
sensitivity and allows you to back away from the start of orgasm can be useful.
Carrying on from our previous discussion, let’s begin with considering the
positions useful for warding off orgasm…

It is common to find that having your hard dick pointing more downwards, being
pressed against the direction that its hardness is directing it, makes it extremely
difficult to orgasm, which can take you further back from the start of orgasm.
Several positions tend to press the penis in this direction. For example, reverse-
cowgirl (with the man lying on his back and the woman straddling him and
riding it but facing away). Another example is to switch from the missionary
position into kneeling up, almost sitting on your ankles and with the woman’s
thighs resting over the top of your thighs. Finally, and more extreme as a
position, having the woman lie down on her shoulders bent backward with her
calves near her head and letting you stand above and plunge down into her is
certainly a position that it’s much harder to come in. The former two examples
are relatively straightforward to transition into smoothly from girl-on-top and
missionary respectively.

There are numerous sexual positions and slight variants depending on individual
comfort, flexibility and relative body sizes. It is very normal to find that the best
positions with one partner are not necessarily the most satisfying positions with
another just due to the way that you fit together. Often the relative heights of the
couple having sex will have a bearing on which positions you both slide together
most naturally. For the purposes of this discussion, I will highlight certain
specific positions according to their most unique use in enhancing the overall
experience. It is useful to think in general of slowing coming positions, deep
penetration positions, shallow and/or comfortable positions, and multiple partner
positions that will be more or less pleasurable depending on how you’re having
sex, when you want to come, how you’re doing it and so on.

You can think of reverse-cowgirl, kneeling-missionary, and the pile-driver (the
three positions described above) as examples of ‘delaying orgasm’ positions
because of the tilted angle that they put your cock in.

Another valuable awareness is to consider which positions are the deep
penetration positions. Most people agree that ‘doggy style’, for example, is one
of the deeper penetration positions but most people are unaware of why this is.
The reason fucking from behind is generally deeper than the standard missionary
position is because of where the knees are relative to the torso.

In a woman’s body the inside of the pussy becomes shorter and shallower the
more the thighs are bent forwards and the closer her knees are to her abdomen.
Increasing the proximity of the knees to the upper body has the effect of
constricting the inside of the vagina and the end result is that any position that
naturally exhibits this tendency will tend to have a feeling of being ‘deeper’ for
her and more that ‘bottoming out’ feeling for you.

You’ll notice when fucking a woman doggy style that if she’s feeling
uncomfortable with it, her tendency will be to round her back, effectively
moving her abdomen and rib cage further away from her knees. This lessens the
constricting effect that I have described. Most men in this position prefer the
woman to really arch her back and stick her ass out so it’s worth bearing in mind
that this position may be preferable when she’s at the point of arousal that makes
the vagina completely ballooned out inside.

Another example of a deep penetration position is missionary with your partner’s
legs over your shoulders. Again, this moves the knees towards the woman’s
body and will tend to feel deeper the more you lean forwards, pressing her thighs
closer in. This is why I’m not really into naming and categorising every type of
position. What’s more important is feeling and knowing how they work and
what they provide so that in any position at all you can adjust your bodies (and
particularly the exact placement of the woman’s legs) to give the most mutually
enjoyable feeling. That means that in a very basic position like woman-on-top
where you’re lying down and she’s straddling you, you should now know and be
able to feel that the closer you bring her body towards yours by having her lean
forward, the deeper and harder it’s going to feel. In this example we took a
position less well known for deep penetration and we made it deeper by
enhancing the knees-to-chest effect but this time we did it with the torso moving
forwards while the thighs stayed put.

Now that you understand how delaying orgasm and deep penetration work in sex
positions, let’s consider tightness and looseness with some examples.

More intuitively than with deepness, making the penetration feel ‘tighter’ is
more or less a matter of how open or closed the legs are. That means that in the
‘spoons’ position (man and woman lie on their sides, parallel and facing the
same direction, with the male penetrating from behind) the feeling is generally
going to be tighter with the legs together in most possible variants, and the
deepness will vary depending on her shuffling her knees up and/or how much
you lean back to fuck harder.

Another example of a legs closed position is the ‘peace sign’. In this position the
woman lies down on her front and you penetrate from behind from lying on top
of her. Your legs are on the outside of hers and her legs can be more or less
closed depending on how tight feels right and how easy it is to penetrate from
here from on top of her ass. This is a good example because a lot of women state
that they masturbate in this position, using their legs together to add to the
pressure. Using sex toys in this particular position can be very effective and I
will introduce my recommendations for toys in due course.

As before, there are variants with every position that you can work this factor
into. The missionary position can become a legs-closed position if you wish,
though as a lying down position, this tends to less effective than an entry from
behind variant. A better example is to take the legs-over-shoulders position
again. In this position it is as simple as putting both her legs over one of your
shoulders rather than one leg over each shoulder to achieve the same ‘closed’
feeling.

In this way, my best recommendation is that you simply experiment with the
different positions with all of your partners. That doesn’t necessarily mean trying
every one from a diagram or what you see in porn. In fact, in porn you see a lot
of positions that real life couples usually neglect because they don’t tend to feel
especially good. In porn, the positions are chosen for the benefit of the viewer
and usually to depict penetration in particular, without legs and bodies in the way
where they might more naturally rest.

When you experiment with different positions with different partners you should
pay more attention to the placement of her legs and body and the angle that you
are aligned towards her and penetrating her. In this way, you will discover the
best positions with each partner naturally. I discovered some of my favourite and
most useful positions just from trying things myself rather than seeing a picture
or something on screen. Most of the positions out there are just variations on the
main popular positions really anyway, so you have to go by feel as you try
different placements.

An excellent and versatile position I discovered from my own experimentation is
kind of a cross between the ‘kneeling missionary’, spoons, and the way that
lesbians scissor each other. Imagine a woman lying on her side as if to take it in
the spoons position, except with her legs split - the leg on top bent forward. In
this position your body is the same as you would be when kneeling in the
missionary position, almost sat back on your calves. From here you straddle her
lower leg and fuck her sideways. This is a particularly deep position and allows
for you to see all of her body and her face at once. This position is also a good
example of a position from which you can easily adjust the deepness and
tightness of penetration from the control of her legs.

Much of the skill with positions relies on how you move between them. In
general, a woman will be expecting you to take the lead in interactions and this
absolutely applies to sex as well. Therefore, it is useful to develop the skill of
moving between sexual positions in a convenient way, leading her as you go.
Some awkward but satisfying positions are best achieved by moving thorough
one or two other positions that get you there.

For example, a particularly dominant move is to fuck your partner completely
freestanding: holding her up on your body from under her thighs while she holds
on to you over your shoulders by clasping her forearms around your neck. This
position is most easily accessed by having her fuck you from on top in the
‘cowgirl’ position and then hugging her and shuffling over to the edge of the bed
until she’s sat on you in the same position but you now have your feet flat on on
the floor and just the ends of her feet are now off the edge of the bed while she’s
still straddling you. From here all you need to do is tell her to hold on behind
your shoulders and you can simply pick her up and stand up in one motion,
fucking freestanding holding her thighs from underneath without ever ceasing
penetration.

Another good example is segueing into ‘doggy style’ from the missionary
position without ever coming apart. From the missionary position we can put her
legs over your shoulders, then both legs over one shoulder, then slide down into
the spoons position and turning into fucking from behind lying on sides without
separating. From here you can remain fucking from behind and get on top from
behind and pull her up into the kneeling doggy style position.

It is important sexually not to fall into the trap of getting stuck in a routine after
finding out as a couple what is mutually pleasurable to do in what order and then
sticking to that recipe too much. However, generally speaking, the positions that
allow the hardest and deepest penetration are often best used later on in a
session, once she is as wet as possible and opened up from all the arousal that
built up earlier on.

My best advice with the moving between positions is to not be afraid of taking
the lead and with time you will become smoother in changing the fucking
without awkwardness. Use deep and shallow, tight and looser, and helpful
orgasm delaying positions as necessary and don’t forget to focus on what you
both find sexy such as the parts of your bodies that you want to be able to see or
whether you want to be able to kiss or pull hair for example.

5 REVEALING FEMALE SEXUAL NATURE



You must understand that all sexual nature is more taboo and capricious than is
commonly acknowledged publicly. When you consider your own private
fantasies, ideas and turn-ons, it is likely that at least a few of them you almost
always keep to yourself and certainly wouldn’t expose to people like family or
work colleagues.

Similarly, all of the women that you meet will have a private internal sex life that
they will reveal more or less of to you as you enter a sexual relationship with
them. One of the clearest markers of success of any sexual relationship is the
extent to which that partner reveals their most secret dirty side to you. There are
several factors that will tend to foster the deepest sexual connection.

The first is discretion. It is imperative that a woman can be sure that whatever
she tells you about her fantasies will not go any further. As trust builds so will
the degree to which she will feel confident that she can open up to you about
anything and that it will not do any harm to the social personas that she will
likely feel at least some wish to uphold.

That means that you absolutely should not tell anyone else about any taboo
fantasies that your partner has or things she expresses a curiosity to try. This will
especially be important if you have any mutual friends or anyone you know that
knows her by name. Her trust in revealing her most uninhibited sexual side
should be nurtured and encouraged and not thwarted by any doubt that certain
disclosures will be passed on as soon as you end up discussing sex or her with
anyone else. It’s better to say nothing to anyone than to give a new partner any
cause for suspecting that there are risks associated with trusting you in sexual
matters.

Equally important is consistently displaying a non-judgemental attitude towards
all sexual proclivities. From your overall conversation about sexual topics it
must be clear that you’ve ‘heard it all before’ and nothing will shock you, much
less cause you to think any worse of her as a result of something she tells you
that she has fantasised about or at least considered in the past. Again, there
should be no barrier to the development of an atmosphere of trust and wide
boundaries without judgement. Your goal in the sexual relationship is to create
and maintain the ideal environment between the two of you for open sexual
expression without risks.

Whether it pertains to you or her, the consideration of maintaining a suitable
public reputation will not just go away. Unfortunately sex is something that
people cannot or will not treat as matter-of-factly as other issues in life and so
for that reason while we don’t indulge societal pressures, we don’t ignore their
significance outside of the context of the given sexual relationship and arousal.

If you make the mistake of appearing judgemental about something in a
woman’s sexual nature that she reveals to you, you are doing the long-term
relationship damage that may be irreparable. If you make her feel bad for getting
freaky with you, it will only make her more reluctant to do so in the future and in
all likelihood her preference will be to shut off with you in future and/or prefer
to explore that side of her nature with someone else rather than you.

In an ideal scenario your discretion and easy-going attitude will make you the
go-to partner for the deepest sexual expression. This is exactly what you want
with all of your partners if you wish to enjoy your sex life and your own
sexuality to the full.

Specifically, it is crucial not to dismiss any of a woman’s sexual fantasies as
weird, unusual, gross, disgusting etc. If something is raised that is to your taste
then enjoy discussing it together, and if something comes up that you find
doesn’t interest you or even turns you off, your best bet is simply to reassure that
the specific thing isn’t as unusual as she may suspect and that you’re really glad
that she chose to share the thought with you. This is the minimum positive
response that I recommend and if the particular thought or fantasy isn’t to your
taste, just make sure to give that kind of encouragement and just move on to
some other sexual idea that is more pleasing to you both.

I’m here to tell you that women are freaks, but we want to enjoy that with them
and solidify the sexual bond of trust for the long term to maintain those high
quality sexual relationships.

When you open the doors for exploring sex and fantasy it may well stray into the
taboo: you’re likely to hear a bit of everything from various partners. The
important factor isn’t even necessarily that you’re into the same things in fantasy
or that you both discover something that you want to try together. The important
factor is that she’s continuing to choose to share that side of her personality with
you at all.

You can read about private fantasies submitted by women in books by Nancy
Friday for examples of the kinds of things that you might hear from your
partners. Reading anthologies like this can be helpful, particularly if you are less
experienced at the present time. You will notice that the more experienced you
get, the more eager women tend to be in wanting to explain their private sexual
persona to you and the more outlandish the fantasies they cite tend to be.

Without giving any names, ages or locations (see my first directive on
discretion), here are some illustrative examples of the kinds of things you may
hear when revealing female sexual nature at the deep connection level.

I had one partner who liked to fantasise about being abducted by aliens and
having all kinds of machines and other life-forms playing with her, probing her,
and making her come in ways she couldn’t imagine before.

I had another partner who persistently liked to think about being gangbanged.
Specifically she liked to think of the dicks involved, to the point that she
preferred to think of their bearers as androgynous people and her only being able
to see their dicks surrounding her, all wanting to take her.

I had a partner who had lesbian inclinations but felt ashamed to act it out. She
liked to have sex with men but was particularly appreciating of a man enjoying
talking all about the idea of her with another women; always a blonde, big-
breasted glamorous woman in her fantasies.

I had a partner that was really into the idea of being raped. She didn’t want to
have sex with someone she wasn’t attracted to, but she was strongly aroused by
the idea of a man being her kind of type, her resisting, and him following her and
attacking her, fucking her vaginally and anally up against a tree with her pants
round her ankles.

I had another partner that had no desire to act on her most taboo fantasies and
again I certainly would absolutely discourage you from actually doing anything
illegal, but she was regularly aroused by the idea of sucking on a horse cock.

I had another partner that would get uncontrollably wet at the idea of underage
sex. In particular she liked to fantasise about her being very young and being
taught and fucked by someone in a position of trust who ought not to abuse his
position but couldn’t resist her. She liked to imagine the teacher making her suck
his dick with her being only ten years old.

These are just a few examples out of many. They serve to show how wild and
taboo the female sexual mind can be. Needless to say, if you’re getting to the
point that your partner has confidence in you to tell you their darkest fantasies,
including the very illegal if they were to be acted out, then you’re very much on
track to being their ideal lover if you aren’t already.

Without considering the most taboo expressions of sexual curiosity, it is still
important to have an understanding of or at least open-mindedness towards non-
monogamy. At a basic level, a woman is more likely to be cautious that her
reputation as someone that is orientated towards monogamy or at least being
capable of being so inclined remains intact as far as her public face is concerned.

With that in mind, I highly recommend that you read and understand books such
as What Do Women Want? by Daniel Bergner and Sex at Dawn by Christopher
Ryan and Cacilda Jetha. In these books, the authors explore the likelihood that
contrary to what we are ordinarily taught, women may not be as monogamous. If
you continue to harbour an attitude that women are more ‘relationship-minded’
than men and that they are less aroused by the possibility of more uninhibited
‘casual’ sex, then you will simply be less likely to have women decide to explore
their more carefree inclinations with you.

At minimum, you need to have an understanding that there is nothing ‘wrong’
with a woman who has exceedingly promiscuous or adventurous sexual desires.
This is a challenge for some men. Frequently you will hear the attitude expressed
that if a woman is less commitment-minded and engages in casual or particularly
wild sex, that there is something in her psyche that isn’t working correctly. This
is a dreadful attitude to take, particularly if you are wishing to expand your own
sexual horizons. If you take this attitude you will not be relating to women that
are any ‘better’ for not being sexually ‘loose’. The attitude doesn’t change
reality. All that it will mean is that women will be more likely to present a phony
‘good girl’ persona to you while saving her wilder side for someone else, or even
more unfortunately just for herself inside her own head. When you take that kind
of attitude, all that you are displaying is that you don’t get it and you will then
lose most of the sexual privileges that come with ‘getting it’.

To understand female sexual nature is to swallow the perhaps uncomfortable
truth that sexual desire in a woman is more similar to sexual desire in a man than
we are accustomed to hearing about. We are frequently bombarded with the idea
that men are the horniest, only think with their dicks, are prone to extreme sexual
fantasies and disinclined towards faithfulness. Men are afraid to entertain the
notion that women are quite similar to this; they’d rather pretend that women are
much more sexually demure than process the kinds of threats that a similarity
might present. In its extreme forms, attitudes like this are what motivate horrors
such as sexual repression, genital mutilation, chastity belts, murdering adulterers
and control of young people.

The reason why men are more loathed to accept female sexual emancipation
than women are to accept male sexuality comes back to the basics of biology. As
I discuss in MGTOW Player and Gold Diggers and Sugar Daddies, biological
facts make female chastity and fidelity worth much more than the same attributes
in men. Therefore, beliefs that women are less likely to be turned on by different
partners and easy sex is nothing more than male wishful thinking. Once you get
out of this wishful thinking that stems from feeling threatened by other men and
accepting societal conditionings without questioning them, you are free to enjoy
the pleasures that come with understanding how things really work and playing
the game to your own advantage.

The usual script about women being less free spirited and requiring commitment
before sex can happen is a result of the reaction to the facts of childbirth and the
economy of sperm and eggs, not the result of those facts themselves.

The fact that women give birth rather than men means that a woman is always
sure that the resulting child is her child, whereas the father cannot be as sure. In
a society in which we deal with property and ownership of things, this becomes
relevant because a man does not want to be in a position where he is working to
support someone else’s child rather than his own. Therefore, with cuckoldry
being one of his greatest fears, he puts far more stock in the woman being
faithful and not off with other lovers than she does in his fidelity. She always
knows that the child is hers.

This is how the cycle of our faulty beliefs about female sexuality start. Biology
dictates divergent interests and concerns. These divergent interests turn into
cultural mores and social preferences and expectations. Those expectations then
start to change the way in which people behave (or at least how they pretend that
they’re inclined to behave) and in the end they actually misshape the way that
we actually think of the two genders.

Male belief in women being more inclined towards monogamy and more ‘turned
off’ by casual sex comes from the brainwashing effect of our overall culture.
This overall culture is rooted in the deep-seated male fear of being a cuck
bringing up children that aren't his own and wishful thinking that women really
aren’t as sexually free spirited as him and other males.

Let it go. Be prepared to question things that you are brought up to believe about
human nature. The idea of a distinction between ‘good girls’ and ‘bad girls’ is
largely a falsehood. Women differ more in terms of the persona that they put out
than they do in terms of the actual levels and types of sexual drives underneath.
When you think that you’re dealing with a more ‘good girl’ type, all you’re
doing is kidding yourself. What’s much more likely to be happening is that she’s
acting out that role for you but at least at one point in her past, she has been
indulging in the so-called ‘bad girl’ behaviour with someone else. What differs
more is the man she is dealing with, his attitude, experience and understanding,
and the resulting dynamic between them.

Let us consider two concrete examples to understand this situation as it can
typically arise in real life.

A woman may end up in a traditional ‘dating’-type relationship with a man that
she meets socially. They are agreed to be in a monogamous relationship and both
parties remain faithful. The man thinks of his partner as a ‘good girl’ type. They
have a reasonably good sex life which began after they decided that they were
together with each other after a series of dates. What he doesn’t know is that in
reality, depending on the circumstances and the other man, his partner would
have even more sex and much faster. When she was younger she sucked off a
man she just met and while away had a ‘holiday romance’ that involved her
getting down to the fucking with a guy she didn’t know after one day, knowing
that she would not have any future with him.

In this example, you could argue that things are going alright for this man and
his relationship but it is also true to say that he does not fully understand female
sexual nature and consequently he does not have the most purely sexual
connection with his partner. Meanwhile, the other men were with her sexually
without nearly as much non-sexual effort or commitment on either side. They
were either more sexually attractive to her and/or they had greater understand
and experience of female sexuality and/or they were in the right place at the right
time.

Another example would be a woman in a relationship who ends up having a
night out in another town and concludes the night by having a threesome with
two men because the opportunity arises and it is something that she was curious
about trying at some point. Her boyfriend doesn't find out but most crucially the
idea that she would be turned on by something like that is not something that he
ever knew about her.

In this example, the woman was unfaithful to the committed relationship but
what it has in common with the first hypothetical scenario was that the partner
was not really aware of the kinds of things that would have the potential to get
her wet and make her want to do something that completely abandons the script
of finding a suitable boyfriend, taking it slow for a while, getting to know each
other, establishing some sort of deeper connection and developing a physical
relationship from there. Both serve as pretty typical examples of a woman
needing no such thing in order to engage in unrestrained sex. In both cases, the
sex took place as a direct result of her desire and the suitable partner and
circumstances.

My recommendation is to focus on desire itself in its raw form as the platform
for the sex rather than any other conception you have received of what may be
necessary for certain women to engage in exciting sex. Everyone has their wild
side and if you do not become the right man for women to express that with then
you’ll end up only seeing the surface level of sexuality. On that surface level you
will understand that she is aroused by men but fail to capitalise on the readiness
that she has the potential to exhibit almost immediately under the correct
conditions.

In Sex at Dawn Ryan explores the idea that sex always existed for pleasure in
order to strengthen overall social bonds at least as much as it was ever for
reproduction. In fact, most sexual practices (especially since the advent of
reliable conception) do not even have the potential for reproduction but we feel
equally compelled to seek out their realisation. In What Do Women Want? Berger
analyses the common situation of desire fading in the context of the socially
sanctioned committed relationship and how this can precede the desire to seek
excitement elsewhere out of the constraints of the approved framework for
intimacy.

The message I want you to absorb is that even before the taboo, it is in the
female sexual nature to be aroused by a variety of partners, including
simultaneously and without any other benefits or commitments in the situation;
just like men.

A woman does not need to know that you are a good person, that you would be
faithful or that you would make a good boyfriend and provide for her in any way
before her body may become aroused and ready for sex. In just the same way
that you are not likely to need any of these things before you can get hard with
the right woman, so she doesn’t need any of them at all before she may become
exceedingly wet and overwhelmed with desire to fuck in spite of what you or her
might have been brainwashed about women needing more time, more
commitment, or more of an emotional connection.

The best type of a connection for a sexual relationship is the sexual connection
itself, which manifests itself in the expression of your most naughty sides, not
engaging only on the level of your least naughty sides by proceeding as if the
woman is some sort of ‘good girl’. So-called ‘good girls’ are either good actors,
acting against their natural inclinations (that are more similar to yours than you
might previously have been ready to acknowledge), or they’re only dealing with
you for some reason other than genuine sexual interest (i.e. for ‘dates’ and
attention). None of these situations are desirable and none of them should arise if
you really understand female sexuality and act accordingly.

Like a man, a woman has promiscuous and adventurous sexual inclinations
which ought to be indulged rather than denied if you wish to connect sexually to
the full. Without dealing with this, you run the risk of one or both of you in a
new or current partnership getting bored, frustrated, or even completely wasting
each other’s time.






6 RELATIONSHIP SEXUAL DYNAMICS




When you have accepted sexual similarities and the possibility of a dirty and
wild hidden side to all of your potential partners, the stage is set for a fulfilling
sexual relationship. In Friends with Benefits I talk more about the different
relationship statuses and how to maintain the most sexual relationship forms but
whatever relationship status you adopt there are some general dynamics which
will apply.

The sexual connection will remain strong while it remains the dominant aspect
of the benefits that you and your partner provide to each other as the relationship
progresses. If other aspects of the net benefit that you provide to each other
begin to take a front seat this often has the effect of diminishing desire and the
sexual connection side of the relationship.

In the other books I outline the different ‘uses’ that men and women have for
each other. Unfortunately, the use of sexual fulfilment doesn’t always blend well
with the other utilities for the relationship - it may lessen as the other elements
strengthen.

‘Using’ someone is a term that is normally applied with negative connotations. It
is important to realise that it isn’t the ‘using’ per se that should be condemned.
Using someone in a way that isn’t mutually beneficial or that you only establish
through some form of dissimulation is what should be avoided, but that doesn’t
mean that all ‘use’ of another person is to be avoided, because the truth is that if
there was no benefit to you in establishing or maintaining the relationship you
wouldn’t be doing it at all.

We’re all ‘using’ the other people that we have an interest in being with for
something. It may that the use is for the fulfilment of sexual desire and the
pleasure of a sexual connection, it could be use for companionship and
entertainment, it could be use for security, provision and care (e.g. money), but it
is always some sort of ‘use’ otherwise it is a relationship that will not last
because to put it bluntly there is no point to it without something that is a net
benefit; something enjoyable. This applies to platonic friendships as well. We
have less time for the friendships that aren’t at least used for enjoyable company.

The thing to understand with the dynamics of a sexual relationship with a
woman is that the ‘use’ that she may have for you in terms of the sexual
connection and satisfaction can change into a different ‘use’ over time if you are
not attentive to that sex or if you take the relationship in a different primary
direction. For example, you may begin with a strong sexual connection and a
great sex life with a new partner. However, once you start spending more time
together, possibly catching feelings, and getting to know each other more on the
fun/friendly/platonic level, the extent of the purely sexual connection that you
started with may be reduced. Another example is in the case where a man makes
a woman his fiancé and then they get married. It’s a cliché among men now that
you put a ring on her finger and the sex dries up. It goes hand in hand with the
purpose or ‘use’ of the relationship changing in her mind from a fucking thing
into a long term care and provision thing.

To maintain the optimum sexual dynamic it is important not to allow another
purpose of the relationship to take the front seat. If you become more like a
woman’s friend or provider she will not see you as a sexual being in the same
way anymore or at least not to the same extent. Similarly, it is possible that you
will feel different about her in this scenario too. There are guys with attitudes
that mean that when they begin to identify a woman as ‘girlfriend material’ they
are no longer as aroused by her in an animalistic way and no longer as capable of
having good sex with her. This is all acceptable if the two parties concerned are
on the same page and wish for their previously highly sexual relationship to take
a revised purpose but the problem with this is that it leaves the sexual side
lacking again and possibly wanting someone else or all too often the man and the
woman are not on the same page with the change and in agreement about the
new dynamic of the relationship. It has been my observation more often than not
in my own experience and in observing the relationships of others that a decline
in the sexual nature of the relationship or a transition to some other primary
purpose leaves at least one of the partners extremely unhappy and frustrated and
ultimately leads to the complete termination of the relationship.

To maintain the sexual dynamic in the relationship it is advisable to be rather
neglectful of providing the other potential uses for yourself when you are with
your partner. That, along with the willingness to try different things in bed to
avoid getting stuck in a rut and being open minded to sexuality in general, will
stand you in good stead to keeping an extremely pleasurable relationship for the
longer term.

In addition to keeping the actual nature of the sexual relationship on course, I
should point out that it obviously helps to actually embody what women
generally find sexually arousing and keep on doing what works.

Though I am open minded to different sexual preferences and practices, I still
want to tell you the absolute uncensored truth from my experiences and provide
you with the best advice. My observation is that women are much more aroused
by men that are sexually experienced and sexually dominant and that they are
either turned off or just not provoked at all sexually by men that are sexually
submissive.

That means that in order to maintain a positive sexual dynamic in the
relationship it is far preferable that you are the sexually dominant leading
partner. I have nothing against male-submissive sex or fantasy, but I cannot say
that my experiences and observations have led me to believe that women often
get aroused by it. In Threesomes, Sex Parties, and BDSM I discuss these topics,
other sexual kinks, and more advanced topics in more detail - suffice to say for
now that if you begin as sexually submissive or become that way, you can expect
that the sexual dynamic in the relationship will be lessened and overall the
relationship is likely to last a shorter period of time than if the dynamic between
you and the woman was one in which you were the sexual dominant.

By ‘dominant’ I certainly do not mean abusive and I don’t even necessarily mean
that you would be engaging in kinky sex, BDSM, or a Dominant/submissive
kinky relationship. What I mean at minimum is that overall you are the one
taking the lead, being sexually assertive, showing her new things, and not ever
ending up in a ‘pussywhipped’ state in the relationship, both in and out of the
bedroom.

When you are the sexual dominant in the relationship, the relationship doesn’t
take another course, and you’re aware of her undying wild nature and open
minded to full exploration of different ideas and practices, the overall dynamic
of the relationship is set for the most mutual pleasure even before any specific
techniques.

Though various positions and techniques are good and have their place, this
overall status of the relationship will have more bearing on the pleasure that you
both experience. If you’re ignorant to the true extent of your partner’s sexuality,
not open minded to her most private thoughts, sexually submissive, and too
flexible to her other wants from a man then she will have less physical pleasure
than a man who gets all of that right, even if you know all of the ‘moves’ while
someone else is giving her a physically ‘basic’ fuck most times but has the
context and the relationship all optimised.

7 FEMALE ANATOMY AND ORGASMS




Once you’ve started the journey towards mastery of your own attitude,
performance and stamina and you are mindful of the woman’s sexuality and the
dynamics of the long term sexual relationship you are ready to start learning
some specific tricks and techniques and they will be all the more powerful.

You can look up all of the supposed different types of female orgasm in various
books. The problem is that there’s a different number and a different
categorisation of the types from pretty much every voice on the matter. Clitoral
orgasms, vaginal orgasms, squirting orgasms, G-spot orgasms, anal sex orgasms,
mental orgasms… The list can go on. In some ways you can consider some of
the distinctions rather artificial. The locus of female pleasure is basically the
clitoris, much like the locus of male sexual pleasure is the penis. Most of the
different supposed types of female orgasm are more or less just different ways of
pleasuring the clitoris - either physically or mentally.

Think of it like this… The most reliable way to come for you is through quality
stimulation of your cock. That’s not to say, however, that it would be impossible
for you to come from having a woman lick your balls, play with your dick in an
unusual way, shove something up your ass, or for you to come without any
physical stimulation whatsoever, such as through a wet dream for example. What
all of these routes to orgasm have in common is that they are a route to pleasure
in the dick, whether directly or indirectly.

Similarly, most of the ‘types’ of orgasm for a woman are basically more or less
direct ways of giving the clitoris pleasure. The distinctions partly come from the
fact that most of the structure of the clitoris is never visible. I’m not going to
patronise you by reminding you where the clitoris is. If you have to, look up an
anatomy diagram on the net and then compare it with a good centrefold of a girl
all spread and ‘showing pink’. The tip that you see under the fold or ‘hood’ of
skin at the join at the top of the pussy is just the tip. The full body and nerve
endings of the clitoris are mostly more inside in the body and cannot be seen
from outside, just like when you feel your hard cock, you can feel some of the
shaft (the erectile tissue) more ‘inside’ your body, such as under your balls.

What this means is that when you fuck a woman in her pussy with your dick and
she comes, you’re basically stimulating the overall body of the clitoris but from
inside where you cannot feel.

A particularly sensitive area inside the vagina that feels like the exact area that
you would be pressing if you were trying to reach the tip of the clit with your
fingers from the inside is known as the ‘G-spot’ (after Grafenberg who claimed
to have discovered it, or at least first documented it in detail).

Let’s first consider a few direct techniques of clitoral pleasure. With the fingers I
generally find that it is better to begin with more general stroking before zoning
in on the clit more specifically. Imagine reaching down between a woman’s legs
with one hand from the top, as you would if pushing a hand straight down into
her pants. Rub around the skin with your index finger, middle finger and ring
finger together. From there you may reach lower, closer to the actual opening of
her vagina. With the wetness accumulating you can rub some of that back and
use that wetness to part her lips with your fingers and from there move in to
concentrating your index finger more directly on the clit as it hardens.

This is the most straightforward way to getting into pleasuring her clit. By
increasing the speed and observing her reaction as you vary the pressure down
with your fingers, you can take her all the way to orgasm in this way potentially.
It can be helpful with a new partner to have her put one hand on top of yours in
this manoeuvre to guide you in her exact preferred pressure and the angle of
rubbing against the clit that she finds the most pleasurable.

Though the head of the clitoris is a relatively small area in most cases, the exact
direction, angle and pressure that you rub it (even when using the wetness from
below) will feel quite different to her. That’s why in this technique it is vital to
pay attention to her breathing and the lack of tension in her body as you get it
right and be careful that her tightening her muscles or recoiling slightly may be
indicative that the exact way you’re rubbing her may not be to her preference.
Rubbing like this may be most useful for foreplay but, particularly with a partner
you’ve got to know, it can be a very effective technique for orgasm.
Another thing to watch out for is that there will be a certain way of rubbing in
this fashion that is more natural or comfortable for your arms and hand. This
may make you more inclined to do it in a certain way on a certain direction to
the head of the clit. It is important that you do not readjust to your own comfort
or the way that you think it should be done. Once you have found the perfect
pressure, speed and direction from her reactions, or from getting her to orientate
your hand on fingers from yours on top, it is important to remain exactly like that
without readjusting to however you were doing it previously. Make a mental
note of the direction onto the clit and the speed and pressure and you will have a
smooth calibrated technique for with her in the future.

More general research has been done into the most comfortable and reliable
ways of digital stimulation of the clit. Go on the internet and look up the
‘Welcomed Consensus’ or ‘Welcomed Method’. Research was made into the
most favourable ways of fingering the clit to achieve orgasm under the
‘welcomed’ name. In this technique you will observe that the woman lies on her
back with her legs comfortably spread. From there, lubrication (see
recommended products later on) is applied to the vulva and the end of the man’s
index finger. With the thumb of the left hand in the pussy to less than the first
knuckle and pressing down towards the asshole, you rub the clit in circles with
the lubed index finger of the right hand. They suggest and demonstrate rubbing
the clit from the ‘1 o’clock’ angle if you imagine the head of the clit as a clock
face. It should be all smooth from all the lube, preventing discomfort from such
direct stimulation. You rub in circles facing the clit and concentrating the
rubbing on the clit’s top right side. All the while you press down with the thumb
of your other hand, with just the tip of it inside her.

This technique absolutely works and you should watch the videos as well to get
a better idea. The only downside to this technique of rubbing the clit is that it
lacks intimacy. To perform this as described, your bodies are relatively far apart
and there is unlikely to be much other contact while you’re positioned to do the
exact welcomed method. What you can learn from it is absolutely worthwhile
though; it will make you more attentive and skilled with your fingers.

Moving on to direct stimulation of the clit with your mouth, I would advise that
you don’t pay as much attention to what you can see in videos. When you watch
porn and see pussy licking, you’ll normally see the man or woman’s tongue
stuck out lapping at the pussy and clit like a dog. My experience has normally
been that this is not the most pleasurable or preferred way to eat it. Like with a
lot of the sex positions, this is depicted primarily because it does more for the
viewer. If porn actors were to get in real close and eat pussy properly there
wouldn’t be much for the viewer at home to see. On the other hand, it looks nice
to see a tongue lapping away at a cunt before fucking.

When you eat pussy it seems to be more effective to get in close, with your lips
sealed to the pussy lips around the clit. This adds a kind of pressure, wetness and
warmth that isn’t possible in the same way just by lapping with your tongue.
Stick your lips out to seal them around the area of the clit and stick the end of
your tongue between them to lick side to side. In this way you can lick harder or
faster as required or add more pressure generally by creating more of a suction
effect with your lips. It can even be pleasurable to her if you make ‘mmm’ noises
a little bit like humming with your lips sealed tightly round her clit like this. In
some cases and with plenty of buildup, having the lips sealed strongly there,
licking hard and fast between and making the slight humming can produce a
very strong orgasm.

Of course, orgasm can also be produced through penetration but this is more
dependant on the hardness of your dick and your endurance through various
positions along with the mental dimension of how she feels about you. Having
said that, I would like to share what I consider to be the most reliable ways of
causing a woman to come through penetrative sex which stimulates the body of
the clitoris through the pussy less directly.

Some of the natural force of fucking with your dick is lessened by the way that
we often have sex on a bed, mattress or other soft furniture. My experience has
been that the ways of fucking that are most likely to bring about orgasm are
those that negate the effect of the force being taken away, usually achieved by
the either the hardest positions once you have built up to them or by holding on
so that the force of your thrusts are all actually going into her rather than being
dissipated through the bed.

For example, in the missionary position, if you reach under her back and clasp
onto her shoulders you can thrust into her deeply and all of the force of your
body will go into her rather than being absorbed by the mattress underneath.
Similarly, in the cowgirl position, bring her close to you and hug her holding up
at the shoulders again. From here you can fuck very hard and fast from
underneath having her come all over your cock. This variation also works well if
you completely take control and hold both of her arms behind her back with one
hand as you pull her in close to you.

Doggy style and from-behind fucking in general allows you to fuck hard without
losing a good portion of the force without any particular adjustment. From-
behind positions are particularly useful to combine with the use of certain sex
toys which we will discuss later on.

I find it most convenient to adapt positions, making them more forceful by
holding on to her, bring about orgasm easier than by making penetration harder
by other means. You can fuck on the floor in the missionary position, or even
harder with the legs over the shoulders however the hardening effect of not
having a mattress underneath tends to be offset by the distracting discomfort of
being on the floor which may be cold or produce carpet burns.

Producing an orgasm through internal stimulation with the fingers rather than
with your cock is very achievable. It is worth looking up advice related to the
‘deep spot’. Some couples find that with fingers all the way in the vagina as deep
as they will go, down and up to underneath the cervix can produce extremely
strong orgasms, however a lot of women also find this highly uncomfortable and
unpleasant, similar to being fucked much too deep and feeling like you’re being
punched inside rather than pleasured so experiment carefully in this area and use
with caution.

More popular in terms of internal stimulation with the finger is activity focussed
on the so-called ‘G-spot’. Often this is associated with extremely strong and
exhausting squirting orgasms… Read on!

8 SQUIRTING ORGASMS




The topic of ‘female ejaculation’ is littered with disagreement and strong
opinions. Recently in the UK, ‘female ejaculation’ was banned from any porn
produced in the UK because the fluid is presumed to be urine and ‘watersports’
type porn is also restricted. Whenever the topic of female ejaculation or
‘squirting’ comes up you will find that many people are adamant that liquid
shooting out is piss and nothing else.

If you want to see a study that appears to legitimise the claim that it is not urine
squirting out in true cases of ‘female ejaculation’, review the following research:
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/17634056
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/19766406

Other studies used ultrasound to confirm the emptiness of the bladder before
inducing a squirting orgasm, though in some cases they found that immediately
prior to orgasm, the bladder filled with some fluid which was then expelled
during the orgasm.

The supporting science behind the squirting orgasm suggests that the Skene
glands in women are similar to the male prostate and that the fluid emitted in a
squirting orgasm is quite different to urine, being very similar to male seminal
fluid but without the sperm cells included.

These two discoveries seem to have fuelled the debate more than they have set it
to rest. My opinion from experience is that there is a distinct female ejaculation
but in some cases where there is pronounced ‘squirting’ of a larger quantity of
liquid, there make be at least some very dilute urine included in the fluid. This
would seem to be cases similar to the women who’s bladders were found to
slightly refill before orgasm in recent studies with an ultrasound of the bladder at
various stages of the experiments.

Any women and couples who are fans of producing the squirting orgasm will tell
you and insist that the ejaculate is not urine because it looks different, smells
different, and tastes different. I have found this to be true as well and so my
conclusion, along with the research, is that female ejaculation is a distinct
phenomenon, but it is arguably also attended by a degree of incontinence at the
same time in some cases owing to the emission that takes place anyway and the
overall strength of the orgasm.

The term ‘G-spot’ and interest in related topics was sparked by the release of The
G Spot: And Other Discoveries about Human Sexuality by Alice Khan Ladas,
Beverly Whipple and John D. Perry. In this volume, the ‘G-spot’, Skene glands
and female ejaculation are discussed but they don’t get into all the detail
necessary to produce the squirting orgasm with most partners.

Most of the research and information that you will see will state a percentage of
women that report having experienced at least one squirting orgasm and leave it
at that. There is a presumption that it is only possible for a few women. In my
experience, and in the findings of other highly experienced people who have
worked in sex and had numerous real life encounters and practice, the female
ejaculation is possible for just about all women. It depends primarily on her
relaxed state of mind towards it and then specific technique rather than anything
inherent in her body making her able to have them easily or not at all.

I find that the easiest method of giving a squirting orgasm is to push your middle
two fingers into her palm up, like you see in most of the squirting clips in porn.
There are actually some good instructional videos out there on the technique and
you should watch some of these as well as following the stages in my
instruction.

Search for squirting tutorials on the big streaming porn sites on the web or look
up Marcus London for another good tutorial. When she is wet, perhaps after the
clitoral fingering techniques described above or after fucking, push the middle
finger and ring finger of your strongest hand into her together palm up with your
index finger and pinky supporting either side and underneath.

From here, tap lightly up and down inside her as if slightly gripping with your
hand. When beginning at this stage, just aim to distribute her wetness around
inside her pussy and open it up slightly before moving on to the more forceful
technique that follows. After a short period of the tapping, start to home in on
the G-spot area. This is a slightly rougher patch of flesh on the upper wall inside
the pussy. It is very close to the opening and pretty much tucked right under the
ridge of the pubic bone that you can feel up from the inside.

The more this area is stimulated, the more swollen and obvious it feels to touch.
After lightly tapping up and down with your middle two fingers it should be
pretty obvious to feel the difference of this area inside. The difference of this
area is similar to the difference in texture between the inside of your cheek and
the end of your tongue. Feel that difference in texture inside your own mouth;
that’s the kind of difference in feeling that you should be looking for with your
fingers when looking to identify the G-spot inside each woman.

For some women this patch will be larger than for other and more or less raised
from the rest of the flesh inside. A difference in texture, however, seems to be
universal.

When you find this area and she begins to open up more, start to stoke that G-
spot in a more concentrated way by hooking your middle fingers more as you
rub and firmly massaging this area as if you were beckoning ‘come here’ with
those two middle fingers inside her.

At this point, if you’re with a woman who isn’t familiar with coming in this way
before, she may explain that she feels like she needs to pee. Take care to reassure
her that it’s okay and that she won’t be peeing herself and that it isn’t even an
issue if she does. You may even wish to encourage her to go to the bathroom to
check and empty out if that is something that will give her more peace of mind
before carrying on for the first time.

Continue applying pressure as you stroke the G-spot, rubbing it on the pulling
part of your finger strokes rather than the pushing in part of the movement. The
G-spot will become more obvious to your touch and you’ll notice her get even
wetter and more opened out inside.

When you can see her relaxing in her body overall and getting into it and the
wetness is building up to the point that you can hear it as well as feel it more,
you can change to the third and final part of the technique.

To finish, change from the pulling strokes to forcefully thrusting those two
fingers up and down inside her rather than the more stroking in and out motion.
For this up and down thrusting you’ll probably want to be kneeling beside her on
the bed so that you can build up to using all the force of your strongest hand as
your whole arm adds to the up and down motion. Go fast and hard so that you’re
yanking up and down and the ends of your fingers are hitting right into her G-
spot where you were previously stroking outwards.

You will feel the G-spot swell right up and her pussy clench and spasm on your
fingers as she comes and liquid either drizzles or shoots out of her with a strong
orgasm. Right after she has ‘squirted’ you will feel the G-spot very swollen to
the point that it’s nearly filling the entrance to her pussy hole.

With many women the technique can be repeated several times consecutively
and more often than not the second and third squirting orgasms come even faster
than the first. It’s a very good technique that many women report to be extremely
pleasurable and often haven’t had before or weren’t even aware that they were
capable of. Some women will say that they can sometimes squirt from the
knowhow and techniques of another woman but have never squirted before with
a man.

It’s worth bearing in mind that the second and third ejaculations come more
easily because this can be helpful in trying more difficult deliberate techniques
such as doing it with your cock. It’s possible from the same position to make a
woman squirt with the head of your cock by putting it into her quite shallow and
yanking it up and down with your hand. If you grip it really hard with your
thumb and index finger at the base it has the added effect of not letting as much
blood back out of your cock, making it even harder for hitting that G-spot as you
move it up and down.

Alternatively you can achieve the same effect with your cock in the doggy style
position by holding it again, going shallow, but concentrating your force on the
downward thrust (towards the G-spot in this position) rather than the upward
stroke. I was once fucking a women in this way after making her squirt first with
her fingers that as she came from my dick on her G-spot and I rammed it all the
way in once her orgasm started she shot out and came in my face from the
combination of the squirting orgasm and my dick pushing in.

You will find that different women squirt in different amounts and in different
textures. With some partners I found that they were squiring so easily and
repeatedly that I needed to keep the bed clean. I have tried waterproof under-
sheets but do not recommend this because you’ll still end up sat in a little puddle
afterwards and they cause the sheets to feel worse in general because all the
sweat just sits on the top. A good idea is to have lots of clean towels in stock
with at least one by the bed. During messy sex such as a squirting session, just
have her roll on top of the towel and get rid of it after she has come enough.

In some cases, and as you can see in some porn, squirting can even be brought
about from anal fingering or anal sex, provided that the G-spot area of the pussy
is being stimulated in the same way. The only difference is that the stimulation is
occurring with one more slight barrier of the skin between her pussy and asshole.

With that thought in mind, let’s move on to consider the enjoyment of anal sex in
general…

9 ANAL SEX




The most difficult situation for commencing and developing a woman’s
enjoyment of anal sex is if she has tried it before just once or twice with a
partner who was less experienced and it was not pleasant for her. In this case,
she will rightly be fairly reluctant to try anal again and will find it more difficult
to believe that it can be enjoyed at least as much as pussy fucking.

The main things that contribute to real enjoyment of anal sex are: the correct
lubrication for the job, the right kind of progression and patience to taking a dick
in there, the right kind of attitude that associates the asshole with lots of possible
pleasure rather than something disgusting or wrong, and a suitable combination
with more general pleasurable clitoral stimulation (remember our previous
comments related to anatomy).

Lubrication is the most simple thing that can prevent the activity from feeling
good and it’s easy to get wrong. The vast majority of personal lubricants on the
market are not much good for anal sex specifically. Even some of the products
marketed as being designed for anal sex aren’t much better. What you need for
good anal is something much thicker and gloopier than most of the lubes. You
can get water-based lubricants that are suitable for use with condoms that are
much less viscous and that’s exactly what you’re looking for.

The problem with most of the water-based lubes is that they seem to be far too
thin or runny for anal. The lubrication and protection just doesn’t seem to stay
where you want it. In the pussy with it being looser and giving it’s own thicker
lubrication this doesn’t seem to be a problem but with anal this is a frequent
source of discomfort. Try a few and find something really thick out of the water-
based lubes. I personally recommend Maximus anal lube which also comes in a
useful pump-dispensing style larger bottle.

After being sure of having the right lubrication it’s important to go slowly with
the build up to full anal sex. This becomes less important the more you and your
partner do it because she’ll get used to relaxing down there and more used to
accommodating you. The sphincter muscles are something that you can get
better at controlling. The more tight you clench them then the more painful anal
sex will be if you push something into your ass whereas the more relaxed those
muscles are, the more slack the sphincter will be and the easier it will be to have
anal sex without pain.

How tight those muscles are being clenched is largely unconscious until you
learn to get more conscious control of whether you’re gripping with your ass or
not. It is therefore up to you to teach your partner how to get more control of
relaxing those muscles ready for you to fuck her in the ass.

A good introduction to penetration whether it’s for the first time or at the prelude
to anal sex in the future is to introduced one lubed finger for one minute
followed by two fingers for about two minutes. It is helpful while doing this to
explain to your partner how to get more control of relaxing.

To learn how to loosen your ass consciously, the easiest thing to do is to learn
that you’re in control of gripping with it and then simply avoid doing that. So,
when you have one lubed finger inside her asshole to the second knuckle, tell her
to squeeze on it to show her how she has control of her ring piece. Have her
squeeze and let go until she can consciously let go and feel it all loosen and relax
as one finger becomes comfortable and pleasurable in there.

From there you can do exactly the same thing with two fingers. Re-lubricate and
push your index finger and middle finger in together, again to about the second
knuckle. Have her squeeze and let go, building more conscious control of the
muscles. She’ll learn that she can accommodate two fingers in exactly the same
way provided that she relaxes the muscles and gives it time to acclimatise.
Though two fingers will feel like a bit of a stretch the first time, you should
concentrate on allowing her to realise that if the two fingers are left still she’ll
get used to the feeling of them being there and eventually it’ll be comfortable
enough for you to move them back and forward slowly.

When you first start moving in and out slowly with your fingers, you’re likely to
notice that she clenches on to them involuntarily. This is a reaction that she’ll
need to unlearn in order to take your cock fucking in there comfortably.
Thankfully with just a little concentration and the growing control of those
muscles, it is easy to learn not to clench on when the fingers or dick are moving
through the asshole.

Once your partner is comfortable with this progression from one to two fingers,
she’ll be less apprehensive about taking your dick in there because she’s already
had the progression from one to two fingers and been shown how to enjoy it in a
comfortable way.

Creating an introduction to anal pleasure in general is your main objective if you
want her to eventually love you ramming your cock all the way in there. It’s a
good idea to try the more beginner types of anal play as part of your overall
fucking so that she can discover various ways of enjoying pleasure at least partly
from that hole before you work up to fucking her in the ass hard.

A finger in her ass, perhaps only to the first knuckle can strengthen an orgasm
brought about by fucking her pussy or licking her out. If you can make her come
in either of those ways anyway, then having the end of your finger in her ass
during that will be a really good introduction to anal pleasure as well as a strong
orgasm in its own right. A lot of people find that they come harder with
something in their ass. My theory is that with something stopping the asshole
from fully closing, the contractions of the orgasm take longer to resolve
themselves and give a kind of resistance that can tend to make the sensation of
the orgasm harder. Whatever the cause, it’s why some women will ask you to
stick a finger in their ass while you’re fucking them, it’s why buttplugs exist, and
it’s why people end up embarrassed in emergency rooms with all manner of
general items stuck up their ass.

In addition to giving pleasure with the fingers and strengthening orgasm, you
may find that you and your partners can enjoy licking each other’s assholes. Of
all the suggestions in this chapter, this is the one that is likely to provoke the
most psychological resistance from overall mental barriers. It’s common to feel
self-conscious about the smell and hygiene in that area along with a feeling that
interfering with the anus sexually is ‘unnatural’ and potentially a source of
shame. For that reason, the asshole is in a way the most private part of the body
and the most intimate if explored by someone else.

A good suggestion before any types of anal play and particularly before anal
licking is to shower together. That way you can fuck in the shower, have fun
together in there and she can wash all in her ass crack and around her asshole
with shower gel, perhaps letting you wash it and touch it in there too. At
minimum, starting with play like this is likely to remove a great deal of the self-
consciousness and the psychological blocker around cleanliness.

Obviously with a lot of what I’m suggesting a more experienced woman will
already be into some of those pleasures, but anal sex in particular is often
something that a new partner would need to be introduced to or at least shown
again if she had little experience and it was not pleasurable.

If your partner is happy with you licking her asshole but it isn’t something that
she’s tried before, she may first experience the sensation as something that
tickles until she completely relaxes. The more she can relax and the more you
engage in any kind of anal play, the less it will feel like a tickling sensation and
the more it will be experienced as a strong erogenous zone.

When you do progress to full anal sex, follow the same procedure with the two
fingers but now moving on to using your cock. That means that when you first
get you cock inside her ass, leave it stationary until both of you can feel that it
has loosened in there from her letting go and relaxing for you. Then progress to
moving slowly; not using your whole cock or going deep at first, just starting
with a slow movement in and out. I find that the most straightforward position
for anal that allows ease of entry, control, and a comfortable angle is spoons.
With a more experienced partner or after plenty of training, she’ll be able to get
fucked in the ass in most positions, but spooning is ideal to start with as some of
the discomfort can come from the angle that the dick presses in at.

With patience, she’ll be able to take a fucking in the ass in the spoons position
just as hard as you would ordinarily give it to her in her pussy and in time the
same will go for the other positions as well.

I should mention at this point that a lot of people (though less heterosexual
people) use ‘poppers’ to enhance the pleasure and accessibility of anal sex. You
will see these kind of nitrite products sold in sex shops but branded as ‘room
odorisers’ or cleaning products. They’re a sex drug long known to cause
relaxation of the vagina and anus and promote arousal, but they’re sold as other
things so that they can remain in the legal ‘grey area’ of being an over-the-
counter recreational drug but not advertised as such. In the gay community in
particular, these products are known to significantly heighten the pleasure of anal
sex for the receiving partner.

My recommendation is to not use unmedicated drugs in your sex life or for any
other purpose. The above comments are for completeness of information only
because you may hear about these ‘odorisers’ or ‘cleaners’ - perhaps seeing them
in sex shops - and wonder how they relate to sex at all.

The last factor to discuss in showing your partner how to enjoy the anal fucking
to the maximum is the combination with other types of stimulation. The
sensation of either your fingers, a toy, or your cock up her asshole may feel very
different to her depending on whether there is any other kind of genital pleasure
going on at the same time. Some women are particularly fond of having their clit
rubbed while being fucked in the ass and report that the combination feels very
different and greatly enhances the feeling of anal to have something else going
on.

The closest that you’re going to get to appreciating the difference is to play with
your own body; fingering in your ass and either jacking off at the same time or
only doing the anal. If my last suggestion made you wince or cringe at the idea
of something going in your ass (even if only a finger), understand that this is the
same psychological resistance that you might meet when suggesting to a new
girlfriend or ‘fuck buddy’ that you want to get into anal sex with her. If you have
that kind of an aversion, this may help you to feel some empathy with partners
who are reluctant to try anything like this at first and will reinforce your
commitment to having that ‘non-judgemental’ attitude to the whole gamut of sex
in order to break down that kind of uncertainty.

Fucking a woman in the ass does go particularly well with clitoral play; allowing
her to associate the anal penetration with overall pleasure and perhaps
experience an orgasm from the pussy play which becomes enhanced from
something in her ass at the same time.

Moving it up a notch, it may work even more intensely with strong vibrators
over her clit and pussy area. See the later chapter on sex toys for the best
recommendations from my experience.

When indulging in anal sex it’s important that you don’t put your partner at risk
of developing a urinary tract infection (or worse) by going from anal sex back to
conventional pussy sex. In general I’m not the biggest fan of female condoms
(also known as ‘femidoms’) but for switching between two holes they’re
particularly useful. The female condom stays inside the pussy and you can keep
going into there from anal sex with the femidom in place for enjoyment in
switching between fucking your partner in both holes without constantly
switching condoms.

Finally, the most extreme variant of anal sex that I have observed women enjoy
greatly is being double penetrated: either by you and a sex toy or by two dicks in
the context of a threesome.

When using a dildo to assist in double penetrating your partner your best bet, at
least to start with, is to use something fairly manageable. It’ll all be squeezed up
tight and often dildos you can get are significantly harder than a hard cock, even
if you’re fully hard and close to coming. The squishiness of the dildo seems to
be a more important factor in getting a double penetration going, rather that the
girth or length of the thing.

When doing this with partners I have normally found it easiest to loosen up her
pussy first by fucking in there, and then doing the same having anal sex. When
you’re in her ass with your dick you can introduce a dildo into her wet and
ready-warmed up pussy. It’s definitely something to do slowly and carefully at
first but I’ve found that once a woman is acclimatised to the double fullness,
she’ll be ready to take it hard in both holes at once and doing so can produce a
particularly violent orgasm.

Having anal sex as part of a ‘DP’ in an MMF threesome is slightly more
challenging and potentially anatomically awkward. I discuss these kinds of
encounters and scenarios in my other book Threesomes, Sex Parties, and
BDSM… The more open-minded and adventurous reader should explore this
volume more for ideas and advice relating to multiple-partner scenarios.



10 HELPING HER TO PLEASE YOU




So far in our discussion we’ve mainly talked about sex from the angle of how a
man can sexually please a woman but there’s a sense in which this approach,
when considered alone, can be a mistake.

In a sexual relationship between a man and a woman, the dynamic ought to be
that the woman is striving to keep the man happy at least as much as the other
way round if the whole arrangement is to last to their mutual satisfaction for any
length of time.

If the overall ‘frame’ of the sexual relationship is that you are doing a whole load
of things and working on yourself purely for her pleasure then you have got the
wrong mindset. What you should have in mind is that it’s all for the enjoyment
that you have and then any women who happens to join you and benefit from all
of that. Secondly, the pleasure that she does receive as your partner is not for her
only either. That too is a shared thing because you should be in a state of mind
where her arousal and bodily pleasure turns you on strongly as well.

Similarly, she should want to please you from her perspective and this should be
for her benefit in the way that it turns her on as well. This way your attitudes and
your entire sex life should be a symbiotic relationship where each of you pleases
the other and gets their own enhanced pleasure from this process.

Throughout the book we have looked at a variety of ways in which you can do
things, learn things, and start to practice doing things that will make sex more
enjoyable for you and your partner at the same time. In doing this though, you
should not neglect to give her space to be the active partner in doing things that
you would like, whether it’s spontaneous or through your guidance and
instruction.

In Threesomes, Sex Parties, and BDSM I talk more about being the dominant
partner and having a woman do what pleases you in a more in-depth fashion. In
defined ‘Dominant/submissive’ relationships and more hardcore sex, ordering a
women around sexually and treating her like a total bitch to be used is something
that can be negotiated to set the stage for no end of mutual fun. However, the
same dynamics apply to sexual relationships at the sightly more ‘vanilla’ end of
the spectrum as well. A woman will want to know that she’s with a man who’s
decisive, knows what he wants, and is comfortable to articulate that while taking
the lead in the situation.

As that applies to the bedroom, you absolutely want to show her how to please
you. Explain you you like certain things and help her to please you. As you get
more involved with certain partners and your own experience grows, you may
find that making this kind of thing a habit is what eventually leads into a fully
blown woman-as-sex-slave role-play scenario.

The only thing that you want to keep in mind as a beginner in helping her to
please you is that you’re coming from a stance of guidance. With that comes
tact. If we remember back to the early chapters of this book, we noted that we
don’t want to do anything that makes her feel unsexy, self-conscious, or
inhibited again. For that reason, it is best not to let your guidance take the form
of criticism or some indirect way of making her think that she’s no good at sex,
doing it wrong, or causing you discomfort. Instead, from the very beginning,
don’t be afraid to just tell her how you like everything, encourage her to do it in
the way that you like, and finally let her know what a good girl she is when she’s
doing it right.

As an example, I find that I’m quite specific about how I want to be given head.
This is definitely an important one because if the dynamic is going right and the
sex is really good she’s going to want to be sucking on your cock a lot. When I
get head, I sometimes find that the main problem can be that the woman is too
focussed on actually sucking it than just getting the thing in and out of her mouth
comfortably. This can lead to her teeth scratching on the skin and it not feeling
good. In early foreplay sessions I’ll be helping her to do it how I like. I’ll instruct
her to open wide properly and take it right back in the throat. I’ll ask her to focus
on keeping it deep and wet rather than trying to go too fast or use too much hand
motion at the same time when playing with me.

No doubt you’ll have other examples of the specific things that you like and the
specific what you’d prefer them done. Go ahead and tell her what feels good and
keep your suggestions (and compliments afterwards) all in the positive. You’re
telling her what to do and how to do it, not what not to do and what to avoid.

Helping her please you in the context of the sexual relationship shouldn’t just be
restricted to the fucking and the sexual favours themselves though. I’ve
generally noticed that women tend to have a more highly developed exhibitionist
side than men do and it’s very likely that this kind of enjoyment will be one of
the modes in which she’ll want to do the things that please you.

I often have partners that want me to choose between the different lingerie that
they have for when we’re going to next meet: showing me photos or wanting me
to pick the colours. You can definitely let a woman know what your preferences
are in what she’ll wear for the occasion and if things are going well it’ll only
enhance her excitement and desire to oblige. Sometimes the best instances of
this kind of thing go hand in hand with role-plays that fit the fantasies that you
share. When you have the conversations about her wilder fantasies that can also
be the inspiration for things that she might wear to please you in the context of
that fantasy or role-play.

Some examples I have enjoyed with partners include them doing the whole
schoolgirl getup or wearing clothes that they don’t mind being ripped if we’re
going to try something rough and forceful but if it’s more suitable to your
fantasies you might have her in latex, a medical outfit or whatever you can think
of.

As well as the exhibitionist side and bringing out her top techniques so she can
feel like a sex goddess when we’re fucking, I’ll also sometimes have her collect
what we’re going to try next from the sex shop or get things ordered… Bringing
us on nicely to the next chapter…





































11 SEX TOYS





Sex toys have always been immensely popular, from the very first vibrators sold
as ‘massagers’ through to the huge variety of items now available since discreet
online shopping came in.

I have tried a wide variety of sex toy products with different partners over the
years and despite these things being very much a matter of personal preference, I
have come to rely on the same kinds of things again and again, noticing that
some kinds of toys do seem to be much better than others overall.

First; some general remarks… I think that sex toys are something that sometimes
men need to readjust their attitude towards. I know some guys that aren’t into
using them or are put off by women having them and so on. Again, to me this is
the kind of thing that’ll only hurt you in the long run because it may lead to you
never making the progress in your own head that leads to everything having
positive potential.

Sex toys are nothing to feel threatened by and it isn’t an issue of whether she
prefers to use a toy than be fucked by you. They’re just equipment that have
good potential in adding even more possibilities to your sex life and should be
something that can become a source of pleasure for you too if you’re trying
things together.

In this chapter I will be talking about sex toys in the more narrow sense. Ropes
and items more restraint and discipline orientated I discuss at length in the other
sex book.

The main sex toys that I recommend wholeheartedly are: dildos, clit vibrators,
buttplugs, and magic wand vibrators.

Dildos are extremely versatile and despite most women complaining that they
aren’t as good as ‘the real thing’, they can come in really handy when you’re
with partners that still like to feel penetrated or all full up at the same time as
you’re going down on them. Useful for DP, really good for strap-on play
whether you’re with one partner or two girls in a threesome, and available in all
kinds of shapes and sizes, it’s well worth having at least a couple in the toy box.
I’ve experimented with double-ended dildos in different settings but generally
find them inconvenient and not necessarily worth having when you’ve got a few
decent basic dildos.

When shopping for dildos it can be better to go to an actual shop rather than
purchase online because often the measurements quoted on websites are
imprecise and that kind of thing can really affect how useable the dildo is for her
since they tend to be quite hard and less comfortable feeling than a real penis.
Doc Johnson products have been around for ages and have a large range
including different textures that may feel better, but this is an area where there’s
a massive variety and it’s worth looking around - perhaps with your partners.

Generally I think that when you’re getting the dildos you might as well go for
the ones with the suction cup base. It gives the option of sticking it to the floor or
wall where she might ride it while giving you head and also the ones with the
cup almost all tend to fit into most harnesses without any problem.

With clit vibrators there are various kinds. The small battery-operated ‘bullet’
kind are very handy and particularly good for foreplay or reaching around to rub
on her while fucking. Other kinds are less convenient. You’ll see quite a few
products in the ‘butterfly’ style where a vibrating part fastens to her clit with
some kind of elastic leg stirrups that allow her to wear the vibrator. These kinds I
don’t recommend so much because they have a tendency to slip out of place
easily and aren’t compact enough for general use. Similar are the ‘cock ring’
types of vibrator. Ordinary cock rings are worn around the base of the penis to
stop blood flowing out and making your dick harder for longer. I much prefer the
unassisted methods of getting and staying really hard that I outlined earlier in the
book and often find all kinds of cock-rings quite uncomfortable. Some of these
combine with a vibrator attached that you position above your dick so that she
can grind her clit on it while you’re inside her. To achieve a good feeling on her
pussy she’ll likely have to move in a way that isn’t optimal for your pleasure and
when you combine this with the general cock ring feeling, these aren’t
necessarily pleasant. My recommendation is to get something small, basic and
versatile as a clit teasing toy.

My overall favourite kinds of toys for pussy simulation are the ‘magic wand’
style of vibrators. These tend to be mains-powered and extremely strong at their
highest settings. Anything battery powered is no match for a high end vibrator
that plugs in the wall socket. The Hitachi is the most notorious and like many
vibrators was originally marketed as a massager. Don’t be fooled: these are
extremely strong sex toys that can produce a hard orgasm rapidly. Since the
Hitachi there have been several brands, some claiming to be even more
powerful. These kinds of toys are excellent and have a large vibrating bulb on
the end that’s easy to position, even during fucking in most positions. Some are
compatible with various attachments that allow for penetrative vibrations as
well. If you’re going to buy just one type of vibrator I would recommend
something like this.

When playing with a wand you may find that the vibrations are too strong on the
higher settings to go direct onto the skin. This doesn’t matter because they still
work extremely well over pretty much any amount of clothing or just the
underwear. Often with a new partner I’ll have her come while giving me head
just by reaching down with the wand and rubbing it over her clit over the top of
her thong, increasing the strength of the vibration as she gets used to it and gets
closer. It’s not unusual to come extremely hard in just a couple of minutes from
one of these things.

To get a feel for how to play with a wand and when to consider ramping up the
power gradually and/or using it over underwear, try rubbing one on your dick
until you come. Obviously if you end up enjoying these toys as well don’t be
afraid to have your partner use it on you when you’re together; there’s no need
for you to be left out in this!

It’s good to have a wand always plugged in, clean, and within reach of your bed.
It can be great on a first time to guarantee at least one orgasm before she even
gets fully undressed and it’s really good for her to be able to combine strong
vibrations with either vaginal or anal sex at any moment with a really high
quality vibrator handy.

Buttplugs are an excellent hands-free solution for some of the stimulation we
looked at earlier where anal play is combined with a focus on fucking or coming
through vaginal sex or pleasure. I sometimes like the glass ones for a kinky view
but the rubber plugs tend of be more comfortable to introduce and remove
afterwards for a beginner. Make sure that you get plugs with a large flare to the
base because if you’re not extremely careful with a lesser-flared model you may
find that the whole toy can go inside the ass which may be a very frightening
experience for both of you and definitely something that you want to avoid.

Getting a few in different sizes is a good idea because they’re the kind of toy that
you can get used to and want to move up in size after using them for a while, but
also they can be uncomfortable to start playing with and get all the way in if
you’ve got one that’s too big too soon. To get the plug all the way in the asshole
you need to go past the widest point so that’s the main dimension to look at
when shopping and another reason to start with the rubber models. Ordinarily
the rubber models have a solid core and and outer layer of rubber that pushes in
somewhat allowing for an easier introduction than you find with the solid and
glass toys.

A particularly novel technique with rubber plugs with a large flared base is to put
the plug in the ass and then rub a vibrator on the base of the plug while it’s in
there. For those that like anal stimulation, this is extremely pleasurable.

An extremely popular type of sex toy is the ‘rabbit’ style of vibrator. There are
many brands and different functionalities now, but generally these toys feature a
battery operated vibrating dildo with a separate vibrating unit for the clit (often
in the shape of a little rabbit with vibrating ears) that sits on the clit when the
dildo part is inside the pussy. These toys can be quite fun but in general don’t
seem to be that hard-wearing and the vibrations aren’t as strong and reliable as
something that plugs in the wall and the dildo part isn’t as hard or as sexy
looking as a regular dildo. Many women have these things as a nice ‘all in one’
for solo play and they can be fun, but with the other options available, I don’t
recommend them as an essential.

Another type of toy that you’ll see a lot of in the shops and online are the remote
controlled vibrating eggs (for insertion) or clit stimulators (that part-insert and
effectively clip on to the clitoral area). I have found these items a fun novelty
(such as when you and your partner go to a strip club together) but they regularly
present issues with slipping or not responding reliably to the remote, even with
the higher end brands and models, so again such toys cannot be recommended as
an absolute essential purchase for the toy box.

With any kind of sex toy you buy, it is imperative that you are able to keep it
clean in between sessions and particularly with different partners. The
recommendations that I have outlined give you all toys that are very easy to
clean without damaging working parts of the toy or damaging the toy. Toys
should be cleaned with antibacterial soap and boiling water. With deluxe wand
vibrators that you won’t want to damage, you’ll find that the bulb on the end that
vibrates is just a rubber part that fits snugly over the top and can be removed for
cleaning on its own.

Overall I recommend the use of sex toys as an exciting adjunct to
everything else that you’re mastering. It’s something for you and a
partner to enjoy together and you should get into the habit of browsing
the shops and online retailers and encouraging partners to do the
same. It can be exciting to try something new and find the latest toys
to enjoy and possibly add to the best items in your collection.

























12 DIRTY TALK AND REMOTE AROUSAL

Earlier on we discussed psychological techniques using language to enhance
male performance to add to the mutual pleasure of sex. In this chapter I want to
highlight the power of talking out loud to share these kinds of effects with
women directly. We do this through dirty talk, which when honed over years can
give you the power to cause extreme arousal with no physical stimulation
involved and even produce orgasms in what is effectively erotic hypnosis.

There’s no magical spell here. Everything that I recommend only works most
powerfully in the context of a relationship where the dynamic is one in which
your partner is strongly attracted to you on a sexual level and responds to your
dominance and lead. That said, when such things as I outlined in the early
chapter are a given, we can certainly take it up a notch and create a sexual
response that you might be sceptical even to believe in before you experience it
for yourself.

It is often said that the brain is the body’s largest erogenous zone or organ (you
could argue that it’s the skin if you’re being finicky) but often the manuals on
sex neglect to outline how this knowledge can be exploited in the most
pleasurable ways in the real world.

What we want is for her to be soaking wet from your voice and what you say, so
that the way you talk to her in the context of arousal is a tool that you can use to
make her even more turned on and assist (or even solely be the cause of) making
her come.

The effectiveness of dirty talk tends to come at the intersection of several
separate but related factors being satisfied: your understanding of female
sexuality, your understanding of how to lead, your knowledge of the turn-ons
that are specific to a given partner, the quality of your sex voice, and your
understanding of the application of language.

That’s a lot of knowledge and skills that have to come together and all of them
are always improved on over time, so don’t be disheartened if your results from
dirty talk aren’t the crazy success you fantasise about in your early experiences
and experiments.

Quality dirty talk depends on you getting very comfortable and spontaneous
about sex on your own before any partners are introduced. When you talk dirty
you need to go through the process of arousal yourself before it’ll ‘rub off’ on
whoever you’re talking with. In Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) this is
referred to as the ‘go first principle’.

NLP is a wide subject area that deals with feelings, states, emotions and change
as they relate to communication as a whole. It is often dismissed as a
pseudoscience and it ought to be noted that many of the research methods and
claims do not hold up to standard scrutiny and that it’s a world of its own in
terms of courses and procedures. Nevertheless, I have found that several of the
ideas and teachings within the NLP world are particularly applicable and useful
in understanding dirty talk, states of arousal and seduction.

Near the very beginning of the modern day ‘seduction community’, Ross Jeffries
was influenced by NLP techniques from the likes of Bandler and Grinder and
outlined how understanding of ‘language patterns’ can be applicable to dealing
with ones own states of mind (usually termed ‘confidence’) and those of a
woman - culminating in the state of arousal.

Taking this more specifically to the bedroom, David Shade (a student of Ross
Jeffries) explained many ideas on dirty talk that had their genesis in the worlds
of hypnosis and NLP. First I want to bring you up to speed on some of the
specifics of language before we look at how our knowledge of female sexuality
in general and of our partners specifically can fit in with these ideas and progress
to looking at some concrete examples.

One of the central notions explained by Jeffries in the early days of the seduction
community was that language is principally a vehicle to ‘capture and lead the
imagination’. He used the expressions ‘weasel phrase’ and ‘embedded command’
to denote the parts of locutions that were either a directive to the thoughts or the
part that the directive is wrapped up in to get you to accept it without strong
resistance. To make sense of that, let’s consider a couple of clear examples.

I might be in bed with a woman, getting into a session of sexy talk, and say the
following as part of the discussion:
“Can you imagine what it would be like to feel wet and hot down there straight
away at the sight of all those people?…”

In that example, the ‘embedded command’ was “feel wet and hot down there”. In
terms of the response I’m really looking for, divorced from the overall context
and content of the conversation, this is the actual command that I’m giving her
that I want her to accept. In NLP another common mantra is ‘The meaning of
your communication is the response you get.’

The ‘weasel phrase’ that set it up and got me to that command without stating it
on its own was “Can you imagine what it would be like to…” Now; I’m not
saying that pacing your talk like this and structuring everything you say in this
fashion is something that you’ll always have to do… There may well come a
time with some women that your sexual chemistry and power reaches a point
where you can sometimes just say ‘get wet for me now’ and achieve the desired
result. However, these examples and this understanding show how the mind and
imagination (and physical response) are guided by the structures that we use in
language in common ways of speaking.

It is beneficial to start to understand language in this way and pay attention to
how your statements allow you to guide your partner’s mind towards certain
sexual thoughts and feelings smoothly and without resistance. It’s the ‘weasel
phrase’ or context that the suggestion is wrapped up in that makes it extremely
palatable for the other person’s mind to consider and respond to straight away.

I don’t suggest that you script anything or try to make all of your persuasive or
dirty talk follow formats like this; that’ll only make you stilted and unnatural.
What I do suggest though, is that you become aware of this so that you can
develop your communication gradually and naturally and become someone that
can guide his partner’s mind through various suggestions and increasingly
explicit sexual thoughts. Pay attention to the bodily directives that are wrapped
up in the statements that you make when you’re getting into talking dirty.

Before you have a high degree of influence with your partner, it is the context of
the suggestions that you make with your works that allows them to be something
that she will visualise and then react to without resistance.

When you talk dirty the focus is on talking about feelings and when you have
her attention fully she will be following those emotions and experiencing the
attendant feelings.

Now, there are certain directions of discussion that tend to be more effective than
others based on the overall understanding of female sexuality that we have
already touched on. Scenarios related to you (or another or an anonymous male)
taking control, being overwhelmed with lust, and completely fucking her will
tend to hit the mark the best, though that can encompass many different
scenarios, acts and sensations.

Once you get to know a partner and her inner fantasies, the more you have the
most powerful key to the parts of her thoughts and imagination that will get her
the wettest and the most aroused.

For example, suppose I get to know a woman sexually who discloses to me that
she fantasises about being ‘gangbanged’ by various men at the same time, that is
something that I would definitely bear in mind while getting into talking dirty
with her and generally any erotic chat that I have with her will be bespoke to her
specific turn-ons and fantasies.

In that situation, my dirty talk with her during a sexual conversation might go
something like this:
“You get me so hard when we’re fucking… I love it that you want dick so bad.
I’d challenge you to see how much you could take… Just imagine, now, what it
would be like to just get taken by five men at once… All so aroused that they’re
rock-hard in spite of each other, jostling for your attention and getting you wet
by touching you all over… Picking you up and spreading your legs, where
you’re now getting soaking wet in anticipation and silently willing them all to
just take you…”

This is only an example. Whatever you do should be your words in the way that
you tend to talk but you need to become sexually uninhibited with your language
and a master at leading your partners through the inner experiences of the things
that will turn both of you on. Did you notice the suggestions hidden in there,
within the scenario that we imagined the dirty conversation segueing into? If she
has a predilection for fantasising about group sex, then this kind of talk would
certainly have the potential to get her wet and impatient with desire right away.

The other ingredient that goes into powerful basic dirty talk is the quality and
tone of your voice. Some men are naturally blessed with a deep, confident-
sounding and highly masculine voice. Personally I wouldn’t count my voice as
one of my strong points but if you’re like me this shouldn’t matter because your
voice will take on more of these positive qualities as you become more used to
talking in a sexual way and even more so as you gain a wealth of sexual
experience with women.

The easiest thing that you can do right away to ensure that your voice will be as
good as it can be for this purpose is to get into it enough to be turned on
yourself. In a state of arousal your voice will naturally take on a lower, nastier
and more seductive tone. For that reason I would not recommend getting
particular far into sexual topics in your talk that don’t turn you on much as well.
Remember that ‘go first’ principle and the former mental techniques of male
performance that we looked at. If the talk is getting you hard that’s a good
indication that it at least has the potential to be getting her wet; if it isn’t then it
may be more an issue of the relationship overall or the content of the talk than it
is your voice.

I personally prefer to talk low right into her ear if me and my partner are in bed.
I don’t want her to be focussed on looking at me or anything else so much as
focussing on exactly what I’m saying at that point. Additionally, I often
completely avoid any physical stimulation during the more extended erotic
conversations with partners. That way I can gauge exactly how much is
happening from just my voice and really learn from the practice how to ramp up
that aural stimulation.

In some circumstances this can even lead to orgasm without any physical
stimulation whatsoever. I was taken by surprise the first time this happened with
a woman I was with but have since replicated it and noted that in hypnosis this is
sometimes the goal for adult audiences or consultations. The first time I
experienced this I was on a boat trip with a partner I had got together with that
week. Before we had sex we were on the boat looking out over the water
together. I stood behind her and talked straight into her ear about what I was
going to do with her later that night. To my surprise she came right there with no
fucking or touching.

At this point I was already well aware that dirty talk can cause a woman to get
wet quickly and very horny but because this public environment meant that we
couldn’t act on our wishes right away, I just kept going with the talk and had my
first experience of taking her all the way to orgasm.

After this experience I looked into the matter in more detail with the hope of
replicating the experience deliberately. My early experiments were slightly
discouraging but I can confirm that this is possible. One method discussed by
David Shade in David Shade’s Manual is to do a more-or-less ‘formal’ hypnotic
induction before describing her feelings, the sex and taking her all the way to
orgasm by command. He called this the ‘thinkoff’ and it works, though you don’t
necessarily need to learn formal hypnotic inductions and methods to pull it off.
The more important points for extreme results from dirty talk are that she has a
good imagination, strong desire with you, and is following every word you
say… and then that you’re able to increase the intensity through the increasing
passion of your content and delivery culminating in a stack of forceful
commands that ultimately make her come.

My preferred formal hypnotic induction just to get her relaxed and in the mode
of hanging on what you’re saying, following it with her imagination and feeling
it in her body is to lay her down on the bed and described a descending staircase
along with commands about hearing my voice and feeling what it describes in
her body. That’s the setup which if successful paves the way for much more
excitement.

In this induction I’ll encourage her to lie down and to just listen to me after
talking for a while. Then I go into describing how she can feel her back on the
bed, sinking in as she relaxes more and more. I’ll describe various parts of her
body relaxing and feeling heavier. When I observe her being lying totally still
and breathing more deeply, I’ll more into talking about how she should picture a
staircase in her mind’s eye, which leads to where she’s totally free and relaxed
and can just hear my voice. I’ll suggest that with each step she will relax more
and more and just hear my voice as her eyelids drop.

You can use any number of steps on the staircase but keeping it short and simple
and coming down from number ten is fine. By the time I describe her at the
bottom, I will lead the talk into scenarios of sex and tell her that she can feel it in
her pussy. I’ll tell her that she can feel her pussy opening up and getting wetter.
From then on I’ll describe it throbbing and clenching on a dick as i variously
lead her imagination through the kinds of sex that I already know she’s into. I’ll
get increasingly intense and vivid with the descriptions and talk about her pussy
burning up more and more as she gets closer. When you get good at this and
after some practice, this will all be real for her. As I observe her getting close, I
speed up slightly in my talking and get heavy with the breathing as I tell her that
her pussy is coming to the finale of the sex and the feelings that go with it that
I’m describing.

With this induction and this basic template of description it is possible to make a
woman orgasm with no touch at all. It’s extremely rewarding to know that you
can do something like that. One word of warning: I have generally found that it
is better if you don’t mention that you’ve learned anything about hypnosis or any
particular tricks to her. I don’t even mention that I am aiming to make her come
on the first session of something like this, just like I don’t normally let on that
I’ll be having her squirt when I’m initiating a more inexperienced partner to the
pussy squirting orgasms as well.

Just wait for a partner who’s intelligent, has a good imagination, is open minded
and you already have a high level of sexual chemistry with and treat the whole
thing like a fun extension of the kinds of explicit talk about sex and dirty talking
fuck sessions that you already have.

Once you have mastered techniques like this; either a full orgasm with a fairly
formal hypnotic induction, or heavy dirty talk that can take all the way or
thereabouts, it can be extremely fun to combine this power from your voice with
all the physical sex too.

A particularly pleasing variant I like is to start with a bit of foreplay and then
focus just on the dirty talk using hypnotic techniques but without the full
induction and her lying separately. I’ll talk nasty until she’s aroused and then just
talk into her ear, describing good sex while leading her to feeling the sensations
in her pussy with all the escalating suggestions that I drop in. As this begins to
take effect I start to suggest the idea that she’s craving for my dick and is going
to come all over my dick as soon as the whole thing is inside her. I’ll then lie on
top of her with just the tip of my hard dick resting against her wet lips as I carry
on just talking to her and emphasising amongst the other suggestions that she’s
going to come all over it immediately as soon as she feels it all the way inside.

When I judge that she’s nearly on the edge of orgasm just from the talking and
the anticipation, I’ll just drive my cock into her and tell her to come on it while
leaving it all the way in deep. When you do this right from what you’re doing
with your voice, she’ll come from one thrust and go crazy.

This is a particularly effective trick but really once your voice and dirty talk
skills are really up there and your sexual relationship is going exceptionally well,
the kinds of combinations and effective suggestions from your talk that you
could use are limitless.

Please do not be discouraged if your early attempts at things like this don’t lead
to orgasm. Overall you should never really have that as the main goal. The main
goal is mutual pleasure really, which is not necessarily synonymous with
orgasms on her part. If you conflate the two, the unwanted side-effect may be
that you cause your partner to have the equivalent of the kinds of performance
anxieties that we ought to try and remove for her and for ourselves. Don’t treat it
too seriously and remember that the overall frame for all of this is
experimentation, a shared experience and a bit of fun.

In time and after considerable practice the more extreme reactions will come
from your partners too. It’s not like the practice isn’t potentially highly enjoyable
and varied. Some people are very much into phone sex and in addition to the
ideas that I’ve presented that rely on you being together in person, phone sex can
be a turn on for many couples.

Some people find that when they’re effectively forced to concentrate on the
voice, because the context of a phone conversation makes it the only thing
available, they can experience stimulation from the talking even more than in
person. For some couples, and in my early experiences, it is circumstance that
begins this process due to one partner travelling or living away for a period of
time. Certainly, if you end up in this situation it would be a very good
opportunity to start using different methods of giving each other pleasure. Even
though we have services like Skype and FaceTime now, I would definitely
recommend giving pure phone sex a go from time to time.

Naturally, most people including me prefer to have the possibility of everything
else by being with each other in person but the problem with this can be that
with all the physical stimulation totally available you may be more reluctant to
really get into the far-out possibilities afforded by dirty talk and the voice alone.

Your voice is one of the most underrated sexual attributes that you have at your
disposal. It is extremely powerful with knowledge and practice so don’t miss out
in allowing it to deepen your connections with your partners and show them
something else new.












13 SEXUAL HEALTH PROTOCOLS




I saved some of the more mundane advice for the end of this book so as not to
lose your attention and interest right away. This may not be the most juicy topic
in a book like this but really it is the most important. Good sexual health is
foundational and a prerequisite to all of the other wild ideas that we’ve studied.
In fact, good health in general is one of the things that’s more important that the
whole of this seduction and sex life issue.

I am a firm advocate of taking personal responsibility for such issues and so all
too often I am disappointed with the attitude of some men in this area. Too many
people only think of the contraception side of the ‘protection’ issue without
giving the personal health side as much attention as it deserves.

If you’re going to be fucking a lot you absolutely need some sensible risk
management in place when it comes to sexual health. There are horror stories
about what they’ll do to your cock at the sexual health clinic but it’s all
exaggerated bullshit. What could happen to you if you take a completely cavalier
attitude to your own body is much worse than any mildly uncomfortable
screening procedures.

Please do not take the attitude that contraception is a ‘woman’s issue’ and
something for her to manage. It’s inadvisable to only be thinking in terms of
conception. More to the point, you should really remember the old adage that if
you want something done you ought to do it yourself. Never has this been more
true than in the area of contraception. As I mention in MGTOW Player, a woman
‘accidentally-on-purpose’ getting herself pregnant is pretty much the oldest trick
in the book.

I strongly recommend condoms for the dual purpose of the pregnancy worry and
to have the barrier to dramatically reduce the likelihood of any sexually
transmitted infections. A lot of people make the argument that the sex is better
raw without the condom and I would not argue to the contrary, however there are
various things that you can do to mitigate the reduced sensation produced by the
use of a condom.

The first thing that you ought to do is shop around through various brands, sizes,
fits and latex thickness. I find that there’s a huge difference in how distracting a
condom can be depending on the exact condom that it is. Get a comfortable fit
with one that you get on well with. When you identify what kind you fare better
with you can then save some money by ordering them in bulk from a medical
supplier website.

When you find one that you get on better with and once you get into the strict
habit of condomsex you get used to it and it needn’t be any hindrance to the
enjoyment of penetrative sex.

Be sure to use condoms correctly as well. To prevent against infection, it is
imperative that you apply the condom before any genital to genital contact. After
use, be sure to hold the base of the thing firmly onto your cock as you withdraw
so that you dick starting to become soft does not cause any slippage and the
condom ending up inside her pussy, unravelling or spilling in the area. Get rid of
it afterwards.

Unfortunately at the time of writing there is not a superior non-permanent
alternative to condoms when it comes to the dual purpose of health and
contraception so just get used to it. Condoms are definitely better than
femidoms.

Another side consideration is the type of condom that you are using. Almost all
condoms are made from latex and are generally fine with most partners but
every once in a while you may run into someone who has a latex allergy. In this
case there ought to be no excuse for not having a suitable solution. There are
condoms made from lambskin on the market (usually made from a part of the
intestine) which some people report as being more ‘natural’ feeling and closer to
the sensation of unprotected sex. Having a few of these in stock for such
situations is a good idea and something worth trying in its own right. Another
option with condoms is to put a small drop of a lubricant that you’re comfortable
with in the end of the condom before rolling the rest of it over your dick.

When it comes to oral sex, there are less infections that you can potentially catch
and they’re of lesser severity. Therefore I regard the use of condoms during oral
sex or dental dams during ‘going down’ as much less essential than the use of
condoms for penetrative sex. Flavoured condoms still do not taste very good for
her and dental dams are more difficult to come by and unfamiliar to most people.

As well as adequate protection for all your sexual encounters, I strongly
recommend a schedule of regular checkups on your sexual health as a back up.
Find a clinic that you can get to easily and that doesn’t have impractical waiting
and appointment times. Make it a habit to go regularly for your own reassurance
and to obtain proof for the more sensible and cautious potential partners that you
meet.

A good sexual health clinic will deliver results for your entire screening via text.
This is particularly useful if you wish to have something that you are able to
show partners or potential partners who are particularly aware of how active you
are. It is standard in most places to get a blood test to determine HIV status
which delivers a fast result (sometimes same day) and then a urine test that you
submit at the clinic and then wait for a week or so for the results on everything
else. It is excellent if you can opt to get this result by text so that you have an
easy record of how often you’re getting the ‘all clear’ to refer back to.

I recommend that for someone who is highly sexually active, a test every six
months is reasonable, even if you are using condoms regularly. Certainly I would
not go more than a year without a full screening. Sex workers and porn actors
get tested even more often than this; it is particularly important for them as in
porn they are generally required to have unprotected sex in front of the camera.

Getting a screening is absolutely essential if you and a longer term partner wish
to progress into having unprotected sex with each other instead of always using a
condom. In that circumstance I recommend that both of you get tested at the
same time, wait for the results and refrain from having unprotected sex with
anyone else until they are similarly confirmed as clean with all the proof.

Sexual health needn’t be something that is more of a worry for more sexually
active people; it just requires more diligent risk management. Often the people
who become infected sexually are those who are careless with sexual health
strategies rather than the people who are simply promiscuous. Being active and
being unsafe are different things and they needn’t go together. Look after
yourself and your body and encourage your partners to do the same and you will
be safer than someone who thinks that they’re monogamous but regularly flaunts
any kind of caution or gets lax over time.
I would not want anyone reading this book to confuse being adventurous with
simply being irresponsible with respect to family planning and sexual health.

























14 RECOMMENDED PRODUCTS AND
RESOURCES





Throughout this book I have described a variety of understandings and
techniques. Should you wish to explore any particular topic in more depth, there
are several good books that would be worth your time.

The following books are an excellent insight into female sexuality and relate to
understanding female inhibition versus promiscuity:

Sex at Dawn by Christopher Ryan
What Do Women Want by Daniel Bergner
My Secret Garden and other books by Nancy Friday.

On the topic of squirting, I recommend tutorial porn and the video series by
Marcus London if you require a visual aid to the explanations here. You may
also consult with the landmark book The G Spot, although this has less specific
information to getting to grips with squirting than is presented here.

In terms of the overall process of orgasm, the book Human Sexual Response by
Masters and Johnson is a landmark study.

Moving on to the psychological element and the possibilities of dirty talk, any
seduction course related to NLP and arousal may be of interest, particularly if
you’re interested in language. Out of these, the Ross Jeffries conference videos
from LA particularly stand out. When it comes to the power of the voice
specifically orientated towards sex, the books by David Shade are well worth
reading. In particular I recommend the original David Shade’s Manual.

Continuing on the theme of verbal stimulation and particularly as it may relate to
phone sex, I recommend Oooh, Say it Again by Alan Roger Currie. In this one,
Currie looks also looks a few good examples of full verbal seductions, putting
arousal into the context of initial interactions.

The topic of BDSM is a little broader and encompasses a lot of intricate sub-
topics so I have more recommended resources in my BDSM and group sex
themed book rather than here. For another good introduction to the concept of
dominance, applicable to passion in more general and ‘vanilla’ sex, the book Sex
God Method by Daniel Rose is good.

One of the oldest and most well known treatments of the topic of sexology is the
Kama Sutra. In general there is not as much on sexual techniques and positions
as the book has a reputation for - it is more of an overall book on dealing with
lovers, courtesans, relationships, and sex. If you have a historical interest and
enjoy reading the classics like I do, then the Kama Sutra is also worth looking
into.

If you require more information on the ideas of male multiple orgasms, control
and extended pleasure, as well as an introduction to tantric sex ideas, then it is
worth looking at The Multi-Orgasmic Man by Mantak Chia and Extended Sexual
Orgasm by Alan and Donna Brauer.

In addition to books and informational resources I would like to reiterate the use
of wand vibrators, dildos, and clit vibes. You’ll find the best range of powerful
vibrators online but for dildos and plugs it may be better to shop in store to see
exactly what you’re getting.

I also recommend porn, though in the age of so many streaming sites and fast
internet connections this doesn’t need to be something that you go shopping for
and then potentially end up disappointed if the scenes were not as arousing to
you and your partners as you expected.

For sourcing porn with partners, my preference is to talk dirty and see what
particular ideas we are both into. From there I’ll load up a private window in my
browser and search direct through Google for what we’re in the mood for or look
into the top rated videos on the streaming porn sites. I recommend getting a
folding laptop stand for such sessions so that you can watch whatever you want
together in bed with your computer held up conveniently. This is even more
useful if you get into webcam sex or filming yourselves if you both end up
thinking that you might make a hotter video DIY style!

With anything that people are so interested in, there are developments in sexual
practices and products all the time so keep in mind that the most important thing
is your own attitude. Open your mind, be prepared to try different things (within
the bounds of safety), talk to other couples, and learn something new all the
time.

I hope to have provided you with a new outlook on sex that will enhance the
pleasure that you share for years to come.

Combine these elements of mindset, understanding, performance, language, and
technique… You will have a lot to keep you busy. Over the years you may find
that this becomes a significant part of what binds your relationships together and
may even start to give you a reputation that allows you to meet new women even
more easily.

Good luck…









Thank you for purchasing this book and taking the time to read it all the way to
the end. I appreciate your interest in my expertise and sincerely hope that it
benefits you throughout the years to come. One small request I have is that you
take the time to leave an honest review on Amazon or wherever you purchased
this book so that I can stay in touch with the needs of all my readers and keep
their perspectives in mind for future editions and more books…

Take care,
PM

More volumes in the Player Mastermind series…

If you enjoyed this volume and want more of the latest knowledge and stories in
lifestyle design for the single man, don’t miss the other specialist titles in the
series… Whether you’re looking for basics on confidence and meeting women
online or out in real life, whether you’re looking for the most straightforward
advice on significantly boosting your overall attractiveness, or whether you’re
looking to take your sex life to the extreme with parties and multiple partners,
I’ve got it covered…

The following additional titles are available on Amazon sites and also available
in ebook formats for reading in private on your preferred device.

Be sure to leave feedback and reviews for future updates and for forthcoming
titles…


Sex Confessions: Real Sex Stories from a Decade of Polyamory

How I chalked up hundreds of notches by not settling down and living my social
life to the full. If you’re looking to explore the alternative to having a
monogamous relationship but don’t know where to start, these real sex stories
will entertain and inspire you to make the most of your freedom.

In this first volume of sex stories, I focus on the real life offline encounters that
combined with not setting traditional relationship boundaries allowed me to
enjoy a sex life that I never previously considered possible.

Sex Confessions 2: Real Sex Stories from Online

How I combined my knowledge of women and sex with methods of online
dating to have experiences normally seen in porn films. In this book I walk you
through some of my most ridiculous experiences that all started online, pointing
out the pitfalls that I avoided, encouraging you to replicate the attitude and
strategies that will take your sex life to the next level.

This book will give you loads of new ideas of how to use the technologies of the
internet to your advantage in attracting new partners and pulling down your
inhibitions.

Online Dating - Expert Tinder Strategy: How to Pick Up Girls on Tinder and
Happn Without Dating

They told me that it was impossible to pick up from online dating apps without
spending lots of time talking to loads of different matches and trying to schedule
my whole week around dates with different women. I wondered whether most
men using new online dating services were really looking to spend all that time
or whether they were hoping for a more efficient approach.

In Online Dating you will learn how to optimise your profile for better matches,
take advantage of the huge access in your area that the application brings,
investigate and communicate with your matches to drill down to the best new
partners, and have a system of new partners coming straight to your front door.

Pickup Women in Nightclubs: The Direct Game Guide to the Nightlife Scene

Who else wants to learn the best nightclub scenes to meet women in and how to
exploit the environment so that you rely on pulling from the best venues again
and again?

In all major cities, the best scenes and venues for meeting women can be
challenging. With problems at the door to issues with friends and drinking, going
to the clubs can be one of the worst ways to meet women or one of the absolute
best depending on whether you’re ready. In this volume I show you how to
identify the best venues and exactly how to approach and deal with groups to
pick up for the rest of the week or even score that night.

Confidence: Building Self Confidence in The Dating Game

How I improved my confidence without new-age woo-woo, embarrassment, or
years of frustration and expense…

Discover the leap in success you can achieve when your mindset is optimised for
the trials of meeting women in the modern dating scene. Without the inner game
fixed, you can be costing yourself far too much play as you repeatedly approach
and interact with women. Learn the shifts in attitude and understanding that I
developed over a decade to give myself the best shot with every approach.

Bodybuilding: Building Muscle and Getting Big

Why it’s not our fault that your gym gains aren’t coming along as desired and
what you can do to set it straight with less disappointment and expense.

In this guide I talk you through the most effective muscle-building gym routines
to save time and show you how to create bespoke nutritional plans all from
discounted supplements and food. With this guide you will have all the
knowledge and strategies of a pro, beyond what personal trainers can offer you
and without the huge cost.

Get Ripped! Diet plans, recipes and training to get shredded…

Thousands of dieters could have the ideal six-pack body but never realise it.
Don’t let it be you… Learn the most efficient and methodical ways of planning
and executing a serious cutting programme.

In Get Ripped I show you the crucial calculations for starting a superior get-in-
shape plan, using your preferred foods, setting baselines to measure and adjust
from so that you cannot fail to progress while everyone else in the gym just spins
their wheels.

Gold Diggers and Sugar Daddies: The Red Pill Guide to Hypergamy

Why some guys always get played and never learn to have intimacy with women
on equal terms. In this book I explore the darker side of the game, showing you
how to avoid being a trick so that you save your cash and your self respect.

Discover the secrets of strippers, escorts, and modern-day courtesans and see
how to use true understanding of the dynamic between the sexes to enjoy
encounters that most men would normally expect to pay for.

Threesomes, Sex Parties, and BDSM: The Dirty Secrets the Polyamory Books
Leave Out!

Are you ready to explore all of the possibilities of group sex, parties, swapping
and D/s relationships? Discover the tried and tested guidelines to a truly
hedonistic sexual lifestyle.

In this volume I show you how to manage the dynamics of non-monogamous
relationships, giving a suitable foundation for enjoying the wildest encounters
that the high class party scene has to offer. Learn from the mindsets and
understandings of a sexually experienced dominant to enhance your own poly
relationships.

MGTOW Player: Digesting The Red Pill (TRP) and Beating Hypergamy

Are you worried about the pitfalls of the committed relationship or left
wondering what the solution is to the ‘pussy power’ in the 21st century dating
landscape? At first complete avoidance is tempting but I wanted a solution that
would leave me sexually fulfilled without compromising my own dignity.

Learn the power of the true players who operate outside of the normal
constraints of a lack of options… Accept the harsh truths of sexual attraction and
male/female relations and learn to turn them to your advantage.

Art of Direct Seduction: Mode One Behaviour and Radical Honesty

Why many players rave about the ‘direct game’ and how you can learn to build
your confidence and improve your results from the pioneers of honesty-based
behaviours with women.

In Art of Direct Seduction, I evaluate and delineate the history of the seduction
community and highlight how you can improve your own sex life by increasing
your authenticity rather than reducing it.

Friends With Benefits: Polyamory, Multiple Relationships and Building Your
Own Harem

Many young people are discovering the freedoms of open relationship types but
only a few young men are learning how to have all the success. With a solid
understanding of male/female relationship dynamics you can join them and have
far more than your fair share of sex partners – even retaining them for longer
than if you offered more traditional commitment.

In Friends With Benefits I break down the nuts and bolts of multiple partner
lifestyles from the perspective of the single male for the very first time. The
paradoxes of jealousy, loyalty and sexual attraction may surprise you…

Sex in London: The Journey and Real Sex Stories of a Confessed Player

The full memoir of my formative years in the game, telling the uncensored story
of my progression from being hopeless with women to being an uncontrollable
womaniser…

In this exposé I reveal all from my time in the seduction community and the
hidden world of sex in London, showing how some of my biggest advances
came from changes of attitude and understanding. At times thought-provoking
and at times ludicrous, this is the XXX-rated account of the game…

THE COMPLETE PLAYBOOK

The complete Player Mastermind series now in one paperback!

Get all 14 volumes in one book in the longest and most detailed overall guide to
attraction, seduction, sex and relationships for men ever created…