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Chapter 1

The Problem and its Scope

Introduction

Sexual satisfaction can be achieved through erotic words/talk, erotic

conversations, sexy and dirty talks. Some people believe that sexual satisfaction can only

be felt and achieved when there is physical touch and non-verbal communication.

However, many also felt the love of pleasure and satisfaction by just hearing naughty

sexual words or even dirty talk since it enhances the experience in sex and giving voice

to their on sexual wants at the same time (Borreli, 2015). In a National United States

study, people with different sexual orientation like homosexuals and heterosexuals who

had sex more often, taken oral sex, has consistency of orgasm, and integrated a lot of

variety like sexual acts, the settings of mood, and sexual communication has a higher

sexual satisfaction and the maintenance of passion (Frederick, Lever, Gillespie, & Garcia,

2016). Productive communication or even a constructive one is also one of many ways

to stimulate sexual satisfaction of persons (MacNiel & Byers, 2005).

In the Philippines, despite of its high religiosity and recognize only heterosexuality,

is one of the countries in the world where now, there is a high public acceptance of

homosexuals (Tubeza, 2013). However, notwithstanding of the huge acceptance, there

are cases that most Filipino gay men describe their experiences using technologies to

explore and conceptualize their sexual identity and giving importance to dating,

sometimes for happiness and erotic desires (Castañeda, 2015). “The internet and the
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mobile world are likely to play seminal roles in you gay men’s identity and the identity

development process” since homosexual like gays felt accepted and want to be felt

identity accepted from the online society (Parsons & Grov, 2013, p. 21).

In the case of erotic chats of homosexuals, there are no provided and published

studies, news, journals, magazines nor articles based in the Philippine context.

Rationale of the Study

The purpose of this study is to show that pleasure can be pursued in many forms

(Rye & Meaney, 2007). Thus, there are many ways to achieve sexual satisfaction not only

physically but also through erotic conversations. The ability to have sex talk tried to

develop the standard of sexual act for both members of the relationship. Therefore, with

the existence of erotic talk it leads to relationship and sexual satisfaction (Jonason,

Betterridg & Kneebone, 2016).

In the study of Jonason, Betterridge, & Kneebone (2016), utilizing a blended

strategies examine; they gave the first orderly documentation and investigation of erotic

talk. It is all about erotic talk that have been neglected in human sexuality because mostly,

people only focuses on the physical sexual satisfaction and have not realize that erotic

talk may contribute somehow and also may smooth the progress of orgasm, pleasure and

sexual satisfaction. Since the study uses thematic analysis, therefore the method

generated a total of eight themes along with how to account for the use of pleasure of

talking erotically by the differences of individuals of the sex participants, socio-sexuality

and satisfaction in relationship.

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In addition to the study of Jonason, et al. (2016), there might be subtleties future

research ought to take care of as they have just like the qualification among telling and

hearing, for example, a lot of details might be given out if there are future researches

which will unravel some logical impacts. Erotically talking substance may vary if thought

about in one night remains when contrasted with devoted relationships. The scope of

erotic talk substance may be more prominent in a long term relationships rather than

transient relations as individuals had grown enough closeness to investigate their

sexuality.

In the study of Wells (1990), homosexuality and heterosexuality are both sexual

direction and sex inclinations. Understanding of terms thought about sexual or stirring

and the utilization of those terms with a mate or darling will be more prominent for lesbians

and gay guys than for heterosexuals.

Since our study is about the language of homosexual sex messaging, so we have

a specific data sample that will be taken to any random participants in a national and local

context. The gathered data to be analyzed ought to have a thematic designthrough

semantic discourse analysis. The possible exclusion that may occur is the age of the

possible target participants which are considered minors.

Objectives of the Study

Our research aimed to attain the argument that more than act, sexual satisfaction

can be achieved through erotic conversations through chatting. According to the study of

Jonason, et al. (2016), the ability to have sex talk tried to develop the essence of sexual
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act in both members of the relationship. Therefore, with the existence of erotic talk it leads

to relationship and sexual satisfaction.

Our study to investigated several options, like including national and local data

sources, specifically one of the electronic discourses such as chatting in order to attain

the argument for validation purposes. Thus, hoping to have an achieving result to support

argument that more than act, sexual satisfaction can be achieve through semantic

discourse analysis of homosexual sex messaging by setting the objective:

a. To describe the stages of sexual conversations between homosexuals

Review of Related Literature

This section discusses the literature and studies related to discourse analysis

about the language of homosexual sex messaging.

Language of Homosexuality

Wells (1990) studied traversed the terminologies that constitutes an arousing erotic

language for homosexual and the breadth to a specific language is employed with a

sexual partner. Its motivation is to distinguish sexual phrasing that speaks to sensual or

exciting language in private connections for female and male who recognize themselves

as homos. Gay people are pulled in to people of a similar sex or sexual orientation. As

expressed in the examination, on the grounds that physical sexual excitement strategies

have been accounted for to be diverse among gay people, sex phrasings may contrast

on what comprises suggestive or stimulating language.

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Pleasure in words may not only affect to those heterosexuals in which both a man

and a woman engage into sexual conversations. The pleasure can also be felt by

homosexuals like gays and lesbians. A different way of communication to get pleasure

from language or even erotic conversations is through using cellular phone and even

computers. In which an individual uses a social media apps and thru the message

software installed in phones is an easy access to be able to communicate with someone

in distance.

Understanding of terms thought about sexual or stirring and the utilization of those

terms with a mate or darling will be more prominent for lesbians and gay guys than for

heteros. Verbal sexual correspondences, utilization of suggestive or exciting words, and

the utilization of slang during sexual collaboration will be more noteworthy for gay people

than for heteros. In connection to our research, to help our case that sexual fulfilment

cannot just be accomplished physically yet in addition through suggestive discussions,

this infers our investigation does not constrain just on heteros but rather likewise gay

people for a similar reason which is conveying sensually for sexual fulfilment (Wells,

1990).

According to Kulick (2000) language, of course, is used by individuals who self-

identity as gay and lesbian, and number of dimensions of this language use, including

vocabulary and the use by males of grammatically and semantically feminine forms to

refer to other males. However, to say that some self-identified gay men and lesbians may

sometimes use language in certain ways in certain contexts is not the same thing as

saying that there is a gay or lesbian language. Speech features of transgender people

include dissociating specific physical or gender-specific characteristics of genital terms,

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including using certain words for specific genitalia in broader ways or as all-purpose

terms.

Sex Messaging

According to Burkett (2009) report on the sexting is occurred on the context such

as casual dating, intimate relationships and dating. Sexting is sending or sharing

somebody explicitly express photos or messages by means of mobile phone. It is not

common since sexting is for intimidate, and committed relationships. Since through

sexting you can enjoy flirting process of writing a sexual text messages, and as well as

visualizing what is being described in the text. At the same time, it is interesting way to

start because it is the process of leading up to potential casual sexual encounter.

Furthermore, the article point out that sexting was a quite common among the

young people today because it is part of the flirtation process. Where men and women

spoke about engaging in sexting the context which intimate sexual relationships

maintaining sexual desire and pleasure. Therefore, reading erotic words or making out

through conversations using technology can be a way of getting pleasure.

Communicating about sex to couples are important because it is associated with

greater sexual satisfaction in a close relationship (Montesi, Fauber, Gordon & Heimberg,

2010). They found it strongly hypothesis it’s because in sexual communication especially

the satisfaction was stronger for males, and the relationship between open sexual

communication and sexual satisfaction was stronger for couples that had been together

for a longer.
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In addition, the authors’ communication on relationship satisfaction is that

discussing sexual aspects of the relationship requires more essential first and foremost

because of being vulnerability and exposure than communication about non-sexual

topics, and second may lead more directly to changes and improvements in an important

area of relationships sexual satisfaction. Effective communication between partners

about general topics was associated with increased overall relationship satisfaction and

increased sexual satisfaction. Furthermore, more open sexual communication between

partners was associated with both increased overall relationship satisfaction and

increased sexual satisfaction for both partners.

People who engage themselves to techniques in sexual communication such as,

talking likes and dislikes about sex and being open-minded about the sexual fantasies

and sexual desires to their partners are more predominantly satisfied with their sex lives

(Montesi, et al. 2010). In addition, erotic talk seems to play a part in relationship and

sexual satisfaction (Babin, 2013) and which it also allows to enable orgasm (Muehlenhard

& Shippee, 2011). These studies also serve as proof on which erotic, dirty or sexy talk in

such a form of language can also contribute to the sexual satisfaction of persons even

doing or not doing sexual intercourse.

In the study of Jonason, et al.(2016) in the United States of America, it is about

erotic talk that have been neglected in human sexuality because mostly, people only

focuses on the physical sexual satisfaction and have not realize that erotic talk may

contribute somehow and also may smooth the progress of orgasm. Since this study uses

thematic analysis, therefore this method generated a total of eight themes along with how

to account for the use of pleasure of erotic talk by the individual differences of participant’s
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sex, socio-sexuality and relationship satisfaction. The eight themes were ‘(1) sexual

dominance (e.g.,”Who’s my fucktoy?”)’, ‘(2) sexual submission (e.g., “Let me be your dirty

slut”)’, ‘(3) instructive statements (e.g., “Put your cock in me”)’, ‘(4) positive feedback /

reinforcement (e.g. “I love it when you slow down,”)’, ‘(5) intimacy / emotional bonding

(e.g., “I love you”)’, ‘(6) sexual ownership (e.g. “Are you my girl?”)’, ‘(7) speaking fantasies

(e.g. “Tell me what you would do with that guy”)’ and ‘(8) reflexive calls (e.g. “Yes /

yeah!”)’. The ability to have sex talk under these following themes tried to develop the

quality of sexual activity for both members of the relationship. Therefore, with the

existence of these erotic talk themes it leads to relationship and sexual satisfaction

(Jonason, et al., 2016).

Theoretical Lens

Goals Plans Action (GPA) theory

Goals Plans Action (GPA) theory was developed by James Price Dillard it explains

the process by which people produce messages like these messages that are intended

to change or maintain the attitudes or behavior of others. The basic principles of the theory

can be used to understand any type of communication behavior; it is helpful to see where

GPA theory started before looking at it more broadly (Dilliard, 2015).

In the mid-1970s, the field of communication began to ask how people produce

messages that are intended to influence others. Researchers began to wonder whether

more could be learned by focusing on what individuals were trying to do in the

conversation itself. In other words, what is it that people are trying to achieve via
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interaction? At the same time it is theory of purposeful behavior because it assumes that

individuals make choices about the messages that they create and that they do so with

some degree of awareness. This does not mean that individuals are knowledgeable about

all available options, nor does it mean that they are aware of every part of the message

production process. It does mean that the theory holds that people usually know what

they are doing. If people are acting purposefully, then their intentions are valid

explanations of their actions. For most people most of the time, information about their

goals can reveal a great deal about their behavior (Dilliard, 2015).

The Goals Plan Action (GPA) theory views message production as three-step

sequence. The first step is “goals” are future states of affairs that an individual is

committed to achieving or maintaining. Goals are what people are trying to do. They

motivate plans, which is the second component in the model. “Plans” are mental

representations of messages and message sequences that are intended to enable goal

attainment. “Actions” are the messages that people actually utter in their efforts to realize

a goal. So, when someone forms a goal of borrowing class notes, that desire prompts a

plan. (e.g., “I could just ask Bill”) and, possibly, an action: “Could I borrow your notes?”

One aim of the GPA model has been to elaborate the nature of goals, plans, and actions.

Another aim has been to understand the relationships among those three basic elements

of the theory (Dilliard, 2015).

Sexual communication serves several functions in relationships. Goals-Plans-

Action Theory, rooted in the tradition of influence and persuasion, it helps explain the

communicative actions and cognitive plans that lead to sexual and relational goal

attainment. Reasons for influence, applied to a sexual relationship include engaging in

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sexual activity, changing the relationship, obtaining permission to perform a sexual act,

fulfilling commitment, or changing the orientation or perspective on sexual attitudes or

beliefs (Hess & Coffelt, 2012).

The Goals Plan Action (GPA) theory it uses in our study to evaluate the theory of

communication as an interactive process in which each actor adjusts his or her message

behavior to the other actor and assumes that individuals make choices about the

messages that they create and that they do so with some degree of awareness. It

considered as action message behaviors because it is explicit messages require little or

no guesswork regarding the speaker’s wants, but implicit messages necessitate more

interpretation. Example when one roommate says to another, “I would like for you to come

to the gym with me,” the speaker’s desire is clear. One that has been mentioned already

is that it attempts to explain, not all behavior, but only purposeful actions. In short, the

adjustments are made messages that vary in terms of fully and clearly expressed,

dominance, argument, and control.

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Chapter 2

Method

This section discusses the research design, data gathering procedures, data

analysis, trustworthiness and Ethical standards.

Research Design

This study used qualitative research design employing discourse analysis. In the

qualitative involves the analysis of the language of homosexual sex messaging. We find

qualitative research design to be suitable for this study.

Hitchcock and Hughes (1995) defined as qualitative research design which is

research method that is used extensively by scientist and researchers studying human

behavior and habits. Which is involves the replacement of this an interpretative,

ethnographic or more broadly, a qualitative model of social research. In qualitative

methodology, we applicable to approaches that enables researchers to learn at first hand,

about the social world that they are investigating through the involvement and as well as

participation especially in our world through focus upon what the individuals actors say

and do.

Discourse analysis recognizes speech not as a direct representation of human

experience, but as an explicit linguistic tool constructed and at the same time strategies

draw heavily upon the theories developed in such fields as sociolinguistics and cognitive

psychology to try to understand what is represented by the various ways in which people
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communicate ideas. The erotic conversations is considered as qualitative words since

readers will be in a better position to critically evaluate individual and studies there is no

limit to what might possibly constitute a qualitative database, and increasingly we are

seeing more and more creative use of such sources as texts and chat documents.

Data Gathering Procedures

Hoping to achieve a result to support argument that more than act, sexual

satisfaction can be achieve through discourse analysis on the language of homosexual;

sex messaging, we modified the methods that could help in achieving the goal.

The data gathered is obviously the erotic conversations from chat (Messenger)

screenshots from the chosen participants. The data was used for the analysis in order to

attain the argument that more than act, sexual satisfaction can be achieved and achieved

objectives. We found as many discourses as possible in order to at least test reliability,

validity and consistency of these discourses that we had unfold.

Data Analysis

As young adults who lived in a modern society and with awareness, knowledge

and influence of the emerging technology, people used it to communicate with others for

different purposes.

We have selected that data source which is chat (Messenger) screenshots of erotic

conversations from homosexual partners to analyze what are those words, phrase, clause

or sentences that could really support our argument that more than act, sexual

satisfaction can be achieve through erotic conversations.

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A thematic view will be shaped as it intends to recognize the fundamental points

or subjects framing the information. Consider subjects as points which repeat in

information in some structure. Thematic analysis continues from recognizing and ordering

the subjects to empower to complete a closer and increasingly definite investigation

(“Thematic Analysis,” 2010).

The researchers used a thematic analysis with the use of messenger chats of the

participants and focused on identifying the patterns in use of speech act of messenger

communication between the boy and the gay. The result of the analysis will be shown in

a figure of stages with the use of analytical framework.

Trustworthiness of the study

This part presents the quality of the study that the researchers will be conducting.

In a qualitative research, trustworthiness is one of the concerns of the researchers since

this will allow a good practice. The researchers will be particular when in terms of

receiving the screenshots of the participants.

The researchers had made sure of the safety and authenticity of the data gathered

from the participants and the information are well hidden in accordance to their concern.

Credibility

The researches will use only one method in analyzing and a way of procedure in

which we are going to use the screenshot messages of the participants and analyze with

the use of thematic analysis. This method may not meet the definition of “triangulation”

(Lincoln & Guba, 1985), however, we will provide a credible data set.
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Transferability

The researchers included in the Appendixes B and C, which consist of the data

that are gathered (Appendix B) and are analyzed (Appendix C) used in order to answer

the objective provided. The complete set of data analysis documents are on file and will

be given.

Ethical Standards

Privacy

Giving respect to the identity and personal information of the participant, the

researcher will protect and censored the name and other information that gives clue to

the identity of the participant and the receiver.

Informed Consent

In the process of getting the consent of the participants is through chat, text

messages, and explicit consent. Most of the participants are far from the down town area

of Davao City and some may come from outside the city. The information and features of

the researchers’ study are given to the participants for the purpose of gathering data for

the research purpose. The researchers will respect the participants’ freedom to choose

to participate in the gathering of data for the research purpose. The consent by all means

that the participants show some form of agreement for the data collection of the

researchers without withdrawing.

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Risk, Benefits and Safety

The researchers will not use research procedure that may cause and harm the

participant either his/her physicality nor mentality. The researchers are obliged at all times

to use a less stressful research procedure as whenever possible.

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Chapter 3

Results and Discussion

This chapter presents the results and findings of the study. There was one

objective which is to describe the language of sexual conversations between

homosexuals. The findings are presented and thoroughly discussed with literature

supports. In this study, the researchers have analyzed the data of the participants to

describe the language of sexual conversations between homosexuals. The following

legends are used in a particular transcription: C=couple, G= gay, B= boy, P= page

number, L= line number.

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“Stages of Homosexual Sex Messaging”

During the coding, there were patterns identified among the conversations of the

couples. These patterns show stages until they reach to the ultimate agreement to do

sexual favors.

There were 10 stages of the language of homosexual sex messaging in which it

starts from stage 1: the conversational starters, stage 2: getting to know, stage 3: sexual

adoration, stage 4: seducing, stage 5: fantasizing, stage 6: sexual command, stage 7:

sexual submission, stage 8: sexual reflexive calls, stage 9: sexual results and lastly the

stage 10: mutual understanding where there are two direction which are fondness and

rendezvous, depending on the couple.

The stage 1 is “Conversational Starters”, in which this marks the beginning of the

conversation and mostly starts with greetings. Sacks (1974) stated that that there are two

important features about greetings. Firstly, they occur at the very beginning of the

conversation. Secondly, they allow all the speakers a turn to respond to the greeting, right

at the beginning of the conversation. Further, the speech act of 'greeting' is expressed

mostly by expressions of time-bound as 'Good morning', etc or 'time-free' expressions

such as 'Hi', 'How are you?', etc. Halliday (1973). The example below shows that the

participants used the form time-free of verbal greeting. According to Dezhara, Rezaei,

Davoudi & Kafrani (2012) that sexes prefer to use time-free greeting forms rather than

more formal ones.

Hi Mark I missed you so bad (C1, G, P53, L1)

Hi migo  (C5, G, P60, L1)

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Hi mark Musta? Miss u Na (C6, G, P63, L1)

The stage 2 is “Getting to know”, in this stage, both gay and boy are exchanging

inquiries to know their information. Furthermore, this is also a stage were both people are

getting to know each other after getting the information on where they live and their

personal details. In communication, the exchange of ideas and information is the essence

of how people interface with one another with regard to sharing ideas and working

effectively together (Effective Interpersonal/Intra team Communication, 2001). Many

communication exchanges involve source and receiver responding to one another

simultaneously rather than sequentially (Washington, 2016).

Taga asa ka mega? Bayot jud ka? (C2, B, P54, L3)

Pwde mag pa ilax migo bet man gd tika 😘 (C5, G, P60, L3)

lagi promise, taga d ai ka? (C3, G, P56, L7)

The third stage which is the “Sexual adoration”, where the sender gives or express

compliment or adoring the physical appearances. Compliments play a role in how we view

ourselves as well as provide us with perceptions of intentions of others in conversation.

Some examples of compliment include: physical appearance, materialistic items, and

personality traits (Karlberg, Moua, McDonough & Alakija, 2015). The data shown above

is much based on the appreciation of the physical appearance. According to Han (1992),

cited in Yousif (2003:15), states that 'compliments' are used for a variety of reasons, and

expressing admiration is one reason. Flirtation and attraction are also major factors to
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look at in regard to compliment behaviors that giving compliments based on physical traits

would be strongly motivated by an intention to be flirtatious (Doohan & Manusov, 2004).

In addition, Complimenting' speech act has been listed under different categories by

many scholars from different perspectives (Shabeeb, 2008). The data of the participants

provided is under to the category of complimenting and praising in which in accordance

Al-Rassam (1999), that to' compliment' somebody means that you are giving, him, her

personal positive evaluation either about his, her appearance, attire, physical shape or

anything related to that person.

Mas ganahan man kog bayot ayaw na pag buot, cge na yours 😉

hehehe lamion baya ka (C2, B, P54, L22)

Macho tapos dako ay bonga jd😁 (C5, G, P60, L11)

Ur. So yummy po kuya (C4, G, P58, L17)

The 4th stage is about “Seducing”. According to Abbey (1982) Seduction, if seen

negatively, involves temptation and enticement, often sexual in nature, to lead someone

astray into a behavioral choice they would not have made if they were not in a state

of sexual arousal. The participant tries to ask and express their sexual desire and goal to

arouse the other person through seducing them.Seduction has not only to convince the

partner, but also to attract him/her.Seductive communication is a complex matter for the

heart and for the mind since it is used as a planned, rational strategy and is also called

into action when there is emotional involvement on behalf of the seducer (Ciceri, 2002).

So you wanna sex chat right now? 😉😉😉😉😉 (C1, B, P53, L6,)
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Im so horny 😋😋 (C3, G, P56, L30)

Kanang free ka this night 😁Horny naman gd kaayu ko pagpatusok

ba😁😘 (C5, G, P60, L13)

In the 5th stage which is about “Fantasizing” is where the participants are

expressing their sexual thoughts, imagery and desires to do if they were in reality and this

is also called sexual fantasizing or fantasy. Sexual fantasies are generally adaptive from

an evolutionary perspective because they serve to enhance sexual arousal which, in turn,

increases the likelihood of intercourse, orgasm, and, eventually, reproduction (Joyal,

2018). The data shown above are examples on how the participants on sex chats express

their sexual thoughts that arouses them and talk about the actions that they could be done

in real life. This type of mental imaging is important for sexuality as it is closely associated

with sexual arousal, better sexual satisfaction, and higher odds of interpersonal sexual

relation (Leitenberg & Henning 1995).

Sexual fantasies not only involve normal sexual partners, but can also involve

strangers, people of the same sex, and group sex (Miranda & Medeiros, 2004). The

thoughts are endless. “In fantasy, people are relatively free to indulge their primitive lusts

and brutish impulses in ways that might be unacceptable in reality” (Wilson, 1997).

Mmmmmm, pag naa lang ka sa akoang tapad karun akoa ta kang

tilapan ug taman lamas lamason ko nag maayu imo totoy

yours (C2, B, P54, L33)

coz i want to lick your ass, until you cum on my face 😋😋 (C3, G, P56, L33)
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Ako sang sup supon ha tilawan sa nako😋 I hala bongga

sya😋😋 (C5, G, P61, L5)

In connection with stage 5 which is Fantasizing, after exchanging ‘one’s sexual

fantasies to better facilitate arousal’ (Jonason, et al. 2016), we go to the next stage which

is “Sexual Command” which refers to those statements that show authority to do

something in order to make their erotic conversation more interesting and pleasurable

than just sharing one’s sexual fantasy. In speech act theory, commands serve

epistemically to express wants of the speaker when it is assumed that the hearer will carry

out an action which satisfies the want (Smith, 1991).

As per examples below, you will be able to notice that sexual command statements

are mostly about commanding to send nude pictures in order to facilitate more arousal.

In the first example, which is from Couple 6, the sexual command comes from the gay

partner stated on line seven (7). On the second example from Couple 2, this time the

command comes from the boy partner on line 31. The last example from Couple 3, as

stated on line 30 to 31, the gay partner ask to send nude picture but this time, it is a little

bit different because of the word “plzz” which means “please”. According to Smith, (1991),

a command with the surface form of a request is explained by considerations of politeness

which I feel should be an integral part of speech act theory. Commands may be toned

down by politeness markers such as please.

Send nude, Ayieeee, Sana true (C6, G, P63, L7-9)

Send pud sa imuha ug imong totoy (C2, B, P54, L31)

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ohhhh my god give some picture plzz, i want to see it (C3, G, P57, L30-31)

The 7th stage is “Sexual Submission”. This refers to submitting one’s self sexually

to the dominant partner in order to put into action the goal of the conversation which is to

have sex on phone. According to Barker, (2014), if somebody identifies as being into

dominant/submissive, or having a dominance/submissive relationship, and then they

probably include power play in their sex life, and perhaps in other aspects of their

relationship. People can identify as dominant, submissive, or switch (which means that

they are sometimes dominant and sometimes submissive). It might be that people

stick to the same roles each time they play together, or that they take different roles

on different occasions. For most people, being dominant/submissive will be something

that they only do some of the time. Such scenes could involve any kind of exchange

of power.

In relation to Goals-Plans-Action Theory of Message Production (Dilliard, 2015),

since the first step is “Goals” that refers to what people are trying to do in an interaction

or conversation, which is in this context to have sex on phone. The second step is “Plans”

which are mental representations of messages and message sequences that are

intended to enable goal attainment. The last step, which is the “Actions”, falls into this

Sexual Submission stage of homosexual sex messaging, since “Actions” refers to the

messages that people actually utter in their efforts to realize a goal.

As per examples below, the sexual submission statements are mostly about

submitting their self to the dominant partner in order to put into action and achieve their

goal. On the first and second example from Couple 5, there is a consistency of
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dominant/submissive relationship because the submissive partner is the boy, therefore

the dominant partner is the gay. Furthermore, on the third example from Couple 1, on

lines 20-21, this time the submissive partner is the gay, so therefore, the dominant partner

is the boy.

In this stage, the dominant/submissive relationship can either be the gay or the

boy and this may alter throughout the conversation or in their relationship as per Barker,

(2014), people can identify as dominant, submissive, or switch (which means that they

are sometimes dominant and sometimes submissive). It might be that people stic k to

the same roles each time they play together, or that they take different roles on

different occasions.

Ok Maghubo nko (C5, B, P61, L1-2)

Ok mag unsa ko? (C5, B, P60, L18)

Mygooodd just please be gentle on me lol😂 (C1, G, P53, L20-21)

The 8th stage is “Sexual Reflexive calls”, this refers to the sex sounds or moans

made by partners in order to speed up orgasm and or to make a hint that they are reaching

their peak. So, this encourages their partner’s climax and thus terminates the sex activity

(Brewer, Gayle & Hendrie, Colin, 2011).

This stage is the continuation of the 3rd step in the GPA theory since these are still

messages that partners actually utter in their efforts to realize a goal and or reach their

climax, through making sex sounds (Dilliard, 2015). As per examples below, all of those
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(and maybe more) have the implicit, if not explicit, goal of trying to improve the quality of

sexual activity for both members of the relationship (Jonason, et al. 2016).

Fck 😇 heaven Uuggghhh Uuuuhhhmmmm (C6, G, P64, L4-7)

Yes hmmmmmahhhh😋 (C5, G, P61, L10)

I am cumming now daddy markkkk (C1, G, P53, L26)

Stage 9 is what we called “Sexual Results”, this stage marks that the orgasm,

pleasure and or climax has been sexually achieved and satisfied. We can distinguish

sexual satisfaction through the words used in their conversation as per examples below.

Carrobles and Sanz (1991) proposed sexual satisfaction as the sixth phase in the human

sexual response. They define sexual satisfaction as the psychological evaluation of

sexual activity, and they consider sexual satisfaction to be the final phase after desire,

excitement, plateau, orgasm and resolution. The average age of participants was young

and other studies with different instruments have concluded that sexual satisfaction is

higher amongst younger populations. Perhaps a partner’s orgasm is a matter of personal

satisfaction. Sexual/gender identity also did not influence sexual satisfaction. These

participants of diverse sexual/gender identities did not report significantly different sexual

satisfaction levels.

Lamii (C2, G, P55, L22)

Hahahaha ok na release ko na (C4, B, P59, L16)

 25

Ipasulod lang kay sarap kaay, Yes of course my baby Ikaw nag enjoy pd ka (C5,

G, P62, L6-8)

The last stage in the stages of homosexual sex messaging is what we called

“Mutual Understanding”. This marks the ending of their sex chat conversation that

signifies fondness and rendezvous. As per examples below, when sex partners had went

through all the previous stages and achieved their goals, plans and action and that is to

have sex on phone for pleasure and satisfaction, as an effect of the sexual results, they

will now thank each other, share intimacy and they will now ask if they can make the sex

intercourse real.

In the study of Ogden (1999), he stated that partners who express intense erotic

attraction to their other partner poses special treatment. A detailed case presentation is

offered, describing one such patient, who demanded that her analyst convey his interest

in her concretely, insisting that he offer her gifts, tell her he loved her, and even engage

her sexually. It is argued that such concrete conveyances reflect, in part, the patient's

attempt to self- and mutually regulate intense, affect-laden experience. The wish that the

analyst demonstrate love for the patient expressed in modulated form her history of

deeply painful and frustrated longings, as well as her hope for a different outcome within

the treatment relationship. Finally, their spontaneous, shared playfulness evolved into a

form of ongoing relatedness that provided the patient significant understanding and

acceptance while providing the analyst an appropriate means of responding to the

patient's erotic demands.

Nytnyt po Love u (C4, G, P59, L26-27)

Ok
 26

Love u too (C4, B, P59, L28-29)

Uk next time around lets make it real (C3, G, P57, L11-12)

Language is primarily a communication tool between members in the society

(Sirbu, 2015). The value of interaction between individuals equates with the sense of

language–the most important communication device. Through communication, people

share knowledge, develop relationships, resolve issues and achieve a variety of daily

goals (Horton, 2017). As with all effective communication, the intent of the conversation

and the strategy for it should be determined in advance (Blair, 1992). Interactive

processing mechanisms leading to linguistic representations alignment between partners

make conversation simple (Garrod & Pickering, 2004).

After the analysis of the conversations, we constructed a framework to summarize

the stage of their sexual communication. Below is the figure showing the 10 stages.

Conclusion and Implications

Figure 2: Analytical Framework

 27

This chapter presents the summary of the findings, conclusion and implications.

The one objective given which is to describe the language of sexual conversations

between homosexuals. Based on the findings the result has shown that there are 10

stages in homosexual sex messaging; (1) Conversational Starters, (2) Getting to know,

(3) Sexual Adoration, (4) Seducing, (5) Fantasizing, (6) Sexual Command, (7) Sexual

Submission, (8) Sexual Reflexive Calls, (9) Sexual Results, (10) Mutual understanding,

in which that are commonly done by the participants. These stages are in sequence in

order to achieve the goal of the participant/s.

Therefore, the following conclusions are forwarded: homosexuals’ messages for

an erotic purpose in which both man and gay end up engaging into sex messaging or

conversation with someone they know or just strangers. Through sex messaging, it

resulted that it can also satisfy the needs of sexual urges of gays and men as they

exchange sexual results where both of them are sexually satisfied with the sexual

conversation which they both shared and talked about. In other words, through the use

of language, it gives arousal to gays and men where both of them gives satisfaction for

their sexual needs.

This study can be applied in the language teaching with the use of the theories:

Speech Act and Goals Plans and Action being used in language. Students can learn the

importance of understanding and knowing how language is being used in a sexual way.

Furthermore, by understanding the usage of language, the students in a language class

can also identify on which category the language is used.

 28

The procedure done in this study will be useful to future researchers who’s

accumulated to this study. The thematic results and the framework can be used as an

implication for language studies in order for others to know the stages of sex conversation

or chats. Furthermore, this study can also be used and serve as a guide to other

researchers whose studies are related with the method and objective.
 29

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32
 33

APPENDICES A
 34

APPENDICES B
Couple 1
 35

Couple 2

Couple 2
36
 37

Couple 3
 38

Couple 3
 39

Couple 3
 40

Couple 3
 41

Couple 3
 42

Couple 3
 43

Couple 4
 44

Couple 4
 45

Couple 5
 46

Couple 5
 47

Couple 5
 48

Couple 6
 49

Couple 6
 50

APPENDICES C

COUPLE 1
 51

COUPLE 2
 52

COUPLE 2
 53

COUPLE 3
 54

COUPLE 3
 55

COUPLE 4
 56

COUPLE 4
 57

COUPLE 5
 58

COUPLE 5
 59

COUPLE 5
 60

COUPLE 6
 61

COUPLE 6
 62

APPENDICES D

Conversation Starters Getting to Know Sexual Adoration

 Greeting in common  Inquiring personal  Directing confession
 Greetings naturally information and compliment
 Starting  Giving personal  Responding
communication by information/ replying to appreciation
Greetings inquiry  Directing confession
 Opening a topic to  Responding to  Expressing sexual
discuss inquiry and asking compliment
 Starting conversation reasons  Speaking sexual
thru greetings  Acting hard to get appreciation
 Opening a topic  Inquiring by curiosity  Giving Sexual
 Greetings with  Asking for assurance appreciation
intimacy/emotional  Giving assurance to  Appreciating body parts
bonding the question/ Asking the  Complimenting in a
address sexual way
 Arousing curiosity  Saying Sexual
 Giving assurance appreciation/satisfaction
 Cursing and  Appreciating thee
questioning partner
 Asking presumption  Asking for more
 Sharing current appreciation
information of action  Admiring sexual parts
 Agreeing from the  Fancying nudity
assurance  Responding to sexual
 Responding and appreciation
Opening a topic  Adoring sexy body part
 Introducing of name  Appreciating sexual
appearance
 Speaking appreciation
in a sexual way
 Appreciating sexually

Seducing Fantasizing Sexual Command

 63

 Inviting sexual  Imagining sexual  Giving sexual

conversation and situation instruction
accepting it  Speaking sexual  Informing sexual act
 Forcing and desire  Demanding for nude
appreciating for sexual  Expressing desires and responding to
communication sexually sexual request
 Giving sexual  Fantasizing for  Demanding sexual
appearance for outcomes images
arousing sexual  Speaking Sexually  Forcing request
excitement for pleasure  Requesting nudes
 Arousing sexual  Speaking sexual  Requesting sexual
curiosity urge act
 Exciting sexual needs  Speaking sexual  Begging for sexual
 Questioning in a sexual climax needs
tone  Expressing sexual  Speaking sexual
 Questioning sexually satisfaction demand
 Asking sexual  Querying for sexual
presumption needs
 Giving sexual signals  Commanding in a
to sex chat sexual way
 Expressing sexual  Speaking sexual
temptation command
 Giving sex appearance  Speaking sexual
for sexual excitement demand/interest
 Showing sexual  Demanding sexual
interest interest
 Responding with  Instructing statement
sexual hint  Instructive sexual
 Understanding the statement and desire
sexual hint  Commanding sexual
 Asking for sexual wants
pleasure and interest  Sharing Sexual
 Responding to mutual instructive statement
understanding of  Commanding
pleasure/interest sexually with
 Controlling the sexual moaning
hint  Instructing sexually
 Asking for sexual  Instructing sexual
pleasure pleasure
 Commanding to
send nudes
 Ordering instructive
statements
 64

Sexual Reflexive
Sexual Submission Sexual Results
Calls
 Submitting himself  Groaning sexually  Giving Positive
sexually  Satisfying sexual feedback/reinforcement
 Submitting sexually reflexes  positive feedback
 Replying sexually  Reflexing calls
 giving gratitude
 Responding to the  Expressing moans
 exchanging gratitude
sexual demand  Expressing moans
 Responding to the with pleasure  Commenting
negatively
sexual signal  Groaning sexual
 Responding to the satisfaction and  Closing to sexual
sexual instructive calls disappointment
demand/interest  Reflexing  Giving negative
 Submitting oneself in appreciative call feedback
a sexual way  Groaning sexually  Sending Negative
 Giving assurance after achieving feedback
sexually satisfaction  Responding negatively
 Submitting one’s self  Moaning sexual  Disappointing gratitude
 Responding to sexual pleasure  Doubting sexual
pleasure  Moaning sexually appearance
 Giving himself  Sounding sexually  Speaking shyness and
sexually  Wailing sexually negative comment of
  Sounding sexually self
while giving positive  Refusing compliment
feedback  Showing shyness
 Moaning with sexually
satisfied statements
 Speaking sexual urge
 Speaking sexual
climax
 Expressing sexual
satisfaction

Mutual Understanding
 Expressing affection
 Responding to affection
 Expressing intimacy and
emotional bonding
 Bonding intimacy
 Responding with
intimacy/emotional
bonding
 Asking for
intimacy/emotional
bonding
 Saying intimacy
statements
65
 Planning for sexual meet
up
 Planning meet-up
 Asking for meet up
 Assuring for future
outcomes
 assuring future outcomes
 agreeing future outcomes
 Asking for future
outcomes
 Resulting sexual
satisfaction
 Outcomes after sexual
activity
 Giving assurance to do
the action again
 Asking if sexually satisfied