Awareness on Marriage and Family Life

The Ministry of Community Development and Sports in Singapore has a

Family Education Department that helps promote family life and skills needed for

healthy and happy families. Its many efforts include programs to raise awareness on

the importance of family life and parent involvement in the development of children

(Family Matters, 2002).

In 1999, the committee on the Family Code reviewed policies and program

that affect families and concluded that more public education was needed. Such

efforts must be year-round and comprehensive to tackle different needs it

emphasized (Public Education Committee on Family Report, 2002).

Stahmann (2002) stressed that as most adolescent have not yet selected a

marital partner, public education on family and marriage helps in acquiring

knowledge about marriage and intimate relationships, improving relationships skills,

and exploring personal attitudes and values regarding marriage, marital

expectations, and marital roles.

Brock (2000) postulated anticipatory education for parenthood helps

adolescent acquire knowledge about child development and different patterns of

child rearing and sometimes include the study and observation of children. These

programs are most successful when they also include the precursors of successful

parenting-self-understanding and the development of interpersonal relationship

skills.

In Japan, family life goals the upper-secondary level include understanding

human development and daily life, understanding the meaning of families, family and

community connections, learning knowledge and skills for daily life, and creating
family and community life cooperatively between men and women (Attitudes on

Family).

The demands that child rearing imposes on the mother’s time, her activities

and fulfillment as an individual is great. Benedicto (2000) found out that successful

child rearing requires work, responsibility, care and concern. Children need a healthy

environment to grow into maturity. The real love that warms the heart, expressed

through words and action. The parents acceptance of the children, caring for their

welfare and spending time with them help to make the child wanted and needed.

In addition, Rosemond (2002) reiterated that parents must accept and

recognize their parents’ duties and role in rising of their children. Parenting is a

vocation and is therefore both a challenge as it is a duty. With no expiry date, it is the

role that parents will carry for as long as there is life. This regard that the stability of

the parents of the family is most important.

Miller et. al. (1993) found out that when children are brought up in and

unhappy, conflicting family, it is more difficult for them to establish happy marriages

themselves. However, some do not all children are influenced by their families to the

same degree, and not all react the same way to the same environment. He added

that not all patent’s have a positive influence on their children nor all parents positive

and healthy family environment in which children can grow. The parent’s

psychological adjustment, parenting style, and the quality of their marriage all have

an effect upon children’s emotional maturity, social competences and cognitive

development.

Robertson (1998) avers that the social and emotional environment of a child

begins with a parent-child relationship. A family that provides a stable environment

and creates the opportunity for a secure attachment for a child is more likely to raise

a happy and cheerful child. Children raised healthy functional family are more likely

to retain good mental health and be well adjusted. He added that the economic

environment of the child is established in the home and influenced by the parent

work history. The impact of financial stress in the home environment can affect

children’s emotions and behavior. Lack of medicine care, poor nutrition and an

environment were parental attention is limited can affect children’s wellbeing.

Traditionally, the father’s role has been the provider and the mother’s role is

the nurturer but as the mothers becomes more involved in providing for the family,

there is a need for a father to be more involved in the role of nurturing children

(Barna, 2003).

Parents once tasked to take care of their children until they are ready to fly on

their own. Parents should provide them roofs and wings. Roofs for them to have the

proper foundation; and wings so that they can soar to limitless height. So they can

achieve their full potential to the masterpiece of human perfection that each one of

them can become. (Lagdameo 2000).

Kerr (1998) once said that adolescence low in self-control came from homes

in which there was high level of conflict, especially about child rearing, values parent

neglected to teach their children and parents demanded very little of their children

both in terms of household chores and school works.

Fisher (1999) commented that when parents take time to explain their

behaviors to their children and also awareness of how that behavior affects the child,

they implicitly acknowledge that the child’s feeling and point of view are important

and worthy attention.

 Kapunan (2002) said that the parent should satisfy their children’s interest and

inquisitiveness without ignoring, teasing or laughing t them. Examples shown by

adults serves as inspiration and motivation to children’s behavior. Parents with

pampered, over protected or neglected and emotionally uncontrolled children

become maladjusted adults. There is nothing more gratifying to a parent than to be a

confident to his children.

Lucca (1997) cited that building self-esteem is a key factor to remember. So

as parents can help your children to know him or her self and accept who he or she

is. Encourage them to make the most of their interest, ability activity level, and teach

them how to adapt their individual style to achieve success. If children accept the

inevitability of change in their lives and concentrate on visualizing good thoughts,

they’ll automatically set the stage to act out their dreams, thereby make them

realities.

Bushweller quoted the article written by Howard Chilcoat, who said that the

act of monitoring is more important than family composition like single parent who

are more vigilante about supervising their children. They where less likely to have

children who experimented with drugs than two-parent families in which the parent

did not keep a close eye on their children.

According to Cooper (2000) the education of children is one of the most

important tasks of any society. The success or failure of such education ultimately

depends on the survival of that society.

Research studies made by Curcio (1999) stated that family influence cannot

just be regulated lightly as the main influence in the education of the children for it is

comparable to the root of growing tree.

 This was supported by Sagay (1999) stating that the family is the institution in

the society that produces, raises, and socialized the next generation.it has also been

pointed out that the child’s personality is the result of the conscious and unconscious

expression of parents personalities, as well their conscious attitude towards children

and their upbringing.

Families and educators share the same goals to help children become

successful learner and social competent members of their community. The primary

education setting for children is the family. In the home environment, children first

develop language, the ability to relate to others, and attitudes about learning and

school.

According to Torralba (1999) home is a place where children are nurtured to

be able to grow in their understanding about love and truth as they mature in the

future years.

Mc Learn (2005) believed that what is experience with in the family, the home

environment that occur within the context of parent-child interaction affect children’s

behavior in other setting such as child care and school.

According to numerous studies, good communication is one of the most

important requirements in a successful marriage. Couple who are able to

communicate effectively can talk about everything, they are able to talk problems

and work them out, able to share feelings to one another, understand one another

and keep close to one another, able to talk thing and try to listen when other is

talking. They don’t believe in holding things rather talk about things and it clears the

air (Hatch and Schurman, 2001).

 Admiration and respect are most important human needs for acceptance and

appreciation. The most successful marriage is those in which these needs are partly

fulfilled in the relationship. Two people who like one another, who admire and

support one another in their respective endeavors, who are proud of each one

another achievement, who openly express appreciation of one another and who

build one another self-esteem, are fulfilling their emotional needs and building a

satisfying relationship (Bell 1997).

Respect in marriage encompasses respect for individual differences and

respect for individual differences and respect to one another person as an important

human being. Partners who are able to meet these needs are usually emotionally

secure people themselves (Bullman, 2001).

Ballard (1993) stress that when parents expose children to high level of parent

anger, the result is heightened emotional and behavioral reactivity on the part of the

child.

Gelfand (1999) support that parents are emotionally healthy are more likely to

have a positive effect on their children’s development. Mothers who are satisfied with

quality and quantity of their personal relationship and social networks are more likely

to demonstrate optimal maternal behavior.

Parents are particularly important in preventing emotional problems. Teaching

no matter how excellent or supportive, can seldom counteract inappropriate

parenting supportive family environment, on the other hand can counteract unhappy

school experience. Parents need information if they want to nurture well and to be

wise advocates for their children (Grusec, 1998).

Synthesis
 Parents have a vital role in preparing the adolescent acquire knowledge about

marriage, and on improving relationship skills and developing positive attitude values

regarding marriage. They hold primary obligation for the development of the child.

They have essential duties to give affection, companionship, understanding, moral

guidance, and discipline and to support the child financially in the form of clothing,

food, shelter, proper medical attention, education and training.