Where to begin with summing up more than a four-year journey into one essay.

I guess I
can start from the very beginning. When I was young, I thought I was going to be a professional
dancer. I started at age five, I mean, my whole LIFE was dancing, can you blame me? Ballet on
Monday. Jazz on Wednesday. Tap on Thursday. Wake up, go to school, come home—snack—
bobby pins shoved into my head, throw my shoes in my bag, off to dance, dinner, homework—
repeat. This is where my dance mentors lived as well as my friends who attended my important
single-digit birthday parties. During the summer days I spent time running up and down soccer
fields or standing ready in the goalie net, petrified of the ball coming at me. Needless to say,
soccer wasn’t quite for me, but I lived for the post-game orange slices and nutritious bags of
Cheetos. I stopped playing soccer at around age eight. So why would I ever stop dancing? I
believe the point where I slowed down with dance was when my sister and friends started
leaving to pursue other things (there were other things outside of dance?!). Truthfully, I have my
parents to thank for this, too. They always allowed me to participate in activities that I wanted,
but they never allowed me to quit without really trying. Fast forward—I’m 15 and I'm being
handed my 10-year dance award. At this point, all my friends had left, I was about to enter high
school, and my sister was almost a senior in high school. I've put in the amount of work that I'm
content with, and I’m ready to move onto the next chapter as the world around me was quickly
expanding.

High school feels like ages ago. Similar to college, the four years really do fly by. I was
blind to this fact, as it seemed I suddenly had to know what I was doing with my life. I was and
still am fortunate to live in the quaint seaside town that I do, which happens to have one of the
nicer public high schools in the state. However, it was pretty standard in terms of the direction
students could go in. During my years at Portsmouth High School from 2012-2016, there were
no “engineering” or “journalism” programs any one student could go into. Sure, we had robotics
and advanced writing courses, but nothing to truly shape a path to a college career. I never
excelled in math, learning about our founding fathers never had me at the edge of my seat, and
forget trying to understand chemistry and physics. However, I always looked forward to
dissecting classic literature such as Beowulf and The Great Gatsby and having the opportunity to
write about them for English class. English was truly one of the few classes I enjoyed throughout
all four years, and it also happened to be taught by one of my favorite teachers: Mrs. Bisbano.
She showed passion for the subject of English in just about every class she taught which drove
me to push myself and do well in all of them. I enjoyed my extracurricular classes as well. I
always looked forward to art class where I could be creative on paper or canvas and step away
from the strict academic agenda. My grandmother was a gifted artist, specifically with oil paints
(God bless her) and she also had a passion for sharing her gift, not only to her family but to those
who wished to learn. Between dance and art, my creative side was always engaged. I couldn’t
forget about marching band, either. It was a huge part of my high school career. Our marching
band was a large program at my school as there were consistently over 150 students. I had played
flute from 5th grade up until my senior year of high school. I knew there was a stereotype with
being a “band nerd”, but my sister loved it and met life-long friends from it, so I was excited to
be a part of the band family. My freshman year as a Portsmouth High School band member
consisted of meeting new friends outside of my two friends from middle school, going on a
cruise to Bermuda, and marching in Barack Obama’s inaugural parade. Through the next three
years, I was able to go to New York and Washington DC as well as towns across the state to
participate in various parades. Little did I know that being in marching band would allow me to
come full circle by senior year.

While I was trying to find who I was in high school, I was slowly being shaped by things
happening around me. I attended a few of my sister’s college tours—all of which I was
addressed as if I was the one looking to attend that university in the coming fall (apparently as a
freshman in high school I looked like an upcoming freshman in college, too?). Going on my
sister’s college tours gave me lots to think about. What would I study? Where would I go?
Would I be living on campus or off campus somewhere? Where would I want to end up after
college? All these thoughts clouded my mind as early as 16 years old since my parents would ask
my sister similar questions. She ended up studying public health at Plymouth State University in
New Hampshire and loved it. A piece of our hearts belong in New Hampshire. Our grandparents
owned a small house in Gilford, where my dad and his siblings would spend time skiing and
relaxing with the family. My dad loved it so much so that my family bought a house that
happened to be down the street from my grandparent’s old place, so we spend a lot of time up
there still. I knew I wanted to go to school in New Hampshire where I could go skiing and
hiking, but still have time to study what I wanted. Once it came time to look at schools for
myself, I felt a bit lost. I had a conversation with my parents before I started looking into school
about what I wanted to study. My dad went to school for mechanical engineering and has been
working in the field ever since college. My mom studied communication and has worked a few
different jobs, and truthfully, I didn’t know that she majored in communication until we had that
conversation about what I wanted to do. I always thought she studied journalism, as she does a
lot of writing in her role. Knowing I wasn’t a science and math person, and knowing I enjoyed
writing and being creative, communication felt like the right fit, though I had never been
formally “exposed” to it in high school. I mean, I loved creating videos on the side, I created a
documentary senior year, what other major could encompass all that? The entire world was in
my hands. I could go to California if I wanted to, and this is where I initially thought I wanted to
go. My parents filled me in on the actual logistics of going to school so far away, so I scaled
back a bit. My dad’s brother’s family lives in Maryland, and I knew that my cousin loved her
school a lot down there. So, I thought “I want to see what schools are like in Delaware and
Maryland”. My dad flew down with me to tour the University of Delaware and Salisbury
University, as well as spend some time around Ocean City, MD with my dad’s brother and my
cousins. Delaware was much too big of a school for me and I didn’t feel as if anything about it
was personalized or relatable. Salisbury on the other hand was much different. You know the
feeling that’s talked about at the end of cheesy high school movies where someone falls in love
with a college and knows it’s right for them? Well, that was me. I loved how friendly the people
were, the campus was beautiful, it was a medium sized school which is what I wanted, there was
plenty to do on and off campus, and Ocean City was not too far from the school. I applied to
Salisbury once I got back, but I still had to look at other options closer to home. I toured the
University of Rhode Island, Roger Williams University, University of Massachusetts Amherst,
University of New Hampshire, Keene State College, Bryant, and a few more around New
England. None of them quite gave me the feeling that Salisbury did. Not even the ones in New
Hampshire—they were all too big or didn’t have the right programs I was looking for. However,
Bryant did stick out to me. It seemed like there was SO much opportunity to grow as an
individual, they were very organized and eager to help students in any way that they could, they
had international programs and professors who brought a lot of knowledge to the school, and the
president of the university was very involved. And of course, the campus was stunning and
spotless. I applied the next day. My acceptance letters started coming in and it felt like Christmas
morning getting to read them. URI, UMASS, UNH, UDEL, Roger Williams University,
Plymouth State University, Keene State College, and Salisbury University accepted me. Though
I really loved Salisbury and could envision myself going there for four years, my parents had a
candid conversation with me. They said that realistically, I would miss out on a lot back home.
And as much as I didn’t want to admit to being a homebody, I so was. Both of my grandparents
passed away within two weeks of each other when I was 14 and it was my first experience with
the death of a close one—this drew my family closer and made me rethink how important they
were in my life. I would miss out on Thanksgiving, Easter, birthdays, small family vacations to
New Hampshire, skiing and hiking, and having to fly home and back for Christmas break, which
would get expensive. This made my heart heavy as I listened, because Salisbury was quickly
fading from my vision of what I thought my life would be for the next four years. None of the
other schools interested me, and I still hadn’t heard back from Bryant. I was getting stressed as
my friend’s posted on Facebook about where they would be attending come fall of 2016. It
wasn’t until one day after school towards the end of April that things would be clearer for me. I
opened my mailbox and pulled out the mail, sifting through letters addressed to my parents, bills
and coupons, and a thicker envelope addressed to me from Bryant. I opened it once I stepped
inside and couldn’t believe what I read. I had been accepted, though I didn’t think I would be. It
was such a proud moment, and I felt as if I couldn’t say no. My parents were thrilled, too, as they
were very impressed by the school knowing that I would be in good hands. The decision was up
to me, and I said yes to Bryant.

Taking a step back in my journey, it wasn’t until my senior year of high school where I
started to grow a liking toward videography. I was always afraid to take a video class at school
because it required me to be in front of or behind the camera either in the school hallways or
somewhere outside of the school walls. Not only this, but the whole class had to watch a video
that I produced? No thanks. This changed when my best friend told me it would be fun if we
took it together, so I anxiously added the class to my schedule for the first part of my senior year.
I remember very clearly that the first class was scary because the teacher was intimidating (as he
should be with high schoolers utilizing video equipment) and the course structure sounded
challenging. Alas, iMovie wasn’t all it was cracked up to be and I caught on quickly. I felt a
sense of pride when viewing the short videos that I produced and edited. Little did I know that
this class would shape my path in how I would decide my future.
 Each senior must complete their dreaded senior project. It took up the latter half of senior
year and required each student to pick something they had interest in, have a mentor who was
involved in the field or topic of your choosing, hit a certain amount of hours chipping away on
your project, and a few more steps along the way. I certainly struggled with what I was going to
do for my final and most important project so far in high school. I mean, there were students
doing a range of things from building a skateboard all the way to conducting a small research
project. I knew it had to encompass me and my experiences throughout the years. I was
brainstorming with my parents one night, and my dad had mentioned that he has a friend who he
volunteers with at the local historical society who takes the town’s videos. It came to me. Why
don’t I make a short documentary to showcase the high school’s marching band? This would
allow me to not only enjoy creating the project, but I can enhance my skills through my dad’s
friend’s experience as well as showcase the band that has been part of my high school career for
the last four years.

Though I took the video class in school to learn more specific techniques in filming and
editing, much of filmmaking for me was self-taught. Prior to the class, I enjoyed summing up
family vacations or solo adventures into 1-2 minute clips with music in the background, so I
wasn’t necessarily afraid to embark on an “official” documentary that would be shown to more
than my family or my video class. My dad’s friend, Mr. Talipsky, ran me through elements that
should be included in a documentary—which were a lot more than I was expecting. A brief
history of the program, interviews of past and current band members, the band director, parent
volunteers, clips of the band, special events and much more. I was excited to take on this
challenge. I borrowed a small camera from the school and planned everything accordingly—
making my storyboard come to life and asking people to be part of this. Luckily, one parent
volunteer took lots of GoPro footage during things like band camp and parades, which was great
to include in the documentary. I still had to do lots of research in the town library by looking
through newspaper articles on the band, yearbooks for photos I could use and books on the
history of the town for any mention of the high school over the years.

Time flew by. My documentary was finally complete. It was now May 2016, and I had
the opportunity to showcase my final product to the band. It was quite a feeling seeing the
excitement on student’s faces when they recognized themselves in clips and related to the
documentary. A few weeks past and throughout that time I would receive compliments from
locals on social media and in-person—congratulating me and expressing their nostalgia as they
remembered their time in band. I felt involved with the community with not only the
documentary but also the knowledge I learned along the way. I became part of history a short
month later, too. After June 3rd, 2016, I was a Portsmouth High School Alumni, ready to embark
on a whole new academic journey.

To be honest, I hated freshman and sophomore year at Bryant. In terms of my social

situation, my roommate and I turned out to be very different. The girls I lived with sophomore
year were so opposite of me that I found myself putting in actual effort to think of things to talk
about. I was lost. Did I pick the right school? Everyone seemed so preppy and materialistic. Like
it was a competition. In terms of academics, I felt fine my freshman year. I took the required
freshman courses and met a few people through group projects, not necessarily diving into my
major quite yet. Sophomore year, I took mass communication with Susan Baran and loved it. I
looked forward to each class with her and learned so much about the field. Meanwhile, outside of
this class, I found it hard to see the point in other classes I had to take as a communication major,
such as the excel courses, or business courses. As I took more classes outside of the required
courses as an underclassman, I found that communication majors were a minority at this school.
I picked up on non-verbal cues from people when we would go around in groups stating our
major, and getting this sort of sympathetic “oh, nice”, or, “what do you do with that?” from
peers. When asked what I do with my major, or what I learn, some would even joke that I would
learn how to communicate and talk to people. This hurt to hear. Little did I know I would hear
comments about being a communication major at a “business school” for the rest of my time
here.

Fast forward having traveled through 11 different countries, experienced more loss,
gaining new perspectives, two different internships, and a few different jobs where I can find
time, and I’m typing this reflective essay in the fall of my senior year here at Bryant with the
only thing staying consistent: my communication major (and I still love it). I’ve met an amazing
circle of friends here who support me in every way. I’ve met peers who also study
communication, and I’ve become closer with communication professors who I feel supported by
as well. I’ve learned that communication goes hand in hand with ethics. This has completely
reshaped the way I want to go with my career, and the way I view companies often recruit from
Bryant. I am minoring in marketing, so it’s ironic when I learn about ethics in my
communication classes but head to my marketing classes where I learn to get into the minds of
people to sell them products that they don’t know they “need”. As of right now, I know I want to
work for a company that impacts people in a positive way or provides products and/or services to
them that can help them do what they love (in my eyes). This doesn’t necessarily mean I want to
work for a non-profit, but rather finding a company or a job where I can combine most things
that I enjoy. For example, I love getting outside. I was extremely fortunate to be picked as a 2019
fall L.L.Bean student ambassador where I could represent one of my favorite brands while
getting creative with the content I put out for them. It took my love for the outdoors paired with
my creative side, with my friends by my side. This felt like a dream job for me for those 10 short
weeks.

Looking forward, I hope to exercise what I’ve learned about ethics throughout my years
here at Bryant. This not only means what I’ve learned from my amazing communication
professors, but also from things that have happened on campus that have shifted the culture and
voices of students. Professor Berkos has mentioned that we’re very protected here at Bryant,
where we are lucky to have faculty listen to what students have to say. However, out in the real
world, the workplace is very much hierarchical, and it’s not so easy to speak your mind when
your job is at risk with so much on the line. Having learned so much about actually
communicating with people (verbally and non-verbally), I can take this with me wherever I work
and through life when I meet people. As of right now, I don’t plan on getting my masters in
communication, but if the opportunity presented itself or if my job required that of me, I would
be excited to continue my studies in my favorite field. Thanks to the communication department
at Bryant, I will always be a true friend, a good citizen, a hard worker, and a dedicated employee.