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“I feel belittled when you tease me in front of friends. Next time this happens I will tell
you, in front of our friends that I feel belittled and I will leave.” Then, next time you are
belittled or, whatever behavior it is your spouse does that upsets you, live up to the
boundary you set.
7. Lack of Sex:
Physical intimacy is what bonds a couple together. Without it, spouses become
roommates instead of husband and wife. It is true that sexuality or the desire for
intimacy increases and decreases based on many things. Women age and hormones
decline, men work too much and come home too tired for sex.
It is beneficial for your marriage and relationship bond to make time for sex unless you
are feeling abused or neglected by your spouse. In those situations, I encourage
communication in the case of neglect and, leaving the marriage in the case of abuse.
8. Losing Your Sense of Self:
It is easy, especially for women who do not work outside the home to lose themselves in
the marriage and family. I would venture to say that this is probably the number one
reason for gray divorces. Women raise their children, support their husband and his
work and hit middle age with no idea who they are and what to do with their empty nest.
Each spouse needs to take time away from the other and the children to engage in
activities they find fulfilling and help them maintain a sense of who they are outside the
marriage and role of spouse and parent.
Yes, you love your spouse but, that is no reason to treat them as if they can’t care for
themselves or to feel you should be joined at the hips. Give your spouse space don’t
keep them on a short leash and you will both be happier. In turn, you will have a better
marriage.