Beruflich Dokumente
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Psychoanalytic Treatment
706
CONCORDANCE AND COMPLEMENTARITY 707
1
From the onset, I apologize for the necessary generalizations diat I use in my
discussions of both self psychology and projective identification. Schools of thought
and methods of treatment tend to involve significant variation in theory and in practice.
In my critique of sameness and difference, as they are approached within psychoanal-
ysis, I critique a basic self psychological and projective identification methodology,
knowing full well that such standard approaches are theoretical conslructs.
2
Racker references Deutsch's (1926) earlier use of the term complementary
attitude to describe somewhat similar phenomena.
708 MERMELSTEEN
3
The figure-ground relationship between conjunctive and disjunctive aspects of
the intersubjective field parallels other figure-ground relationships between those
aspects of the intersubjective field that are currently being highlighted (figure) and
those aspects that are being ignored or denied (ground). See Mermelstein (1998) for a
discussion of shifting figure-ground relationships as they occur wilhin the analytic
encounter.
710 MERMELSTEIN
only ones with a certain affect, idea, or personality trait. With a comple-
mentary identification, the complex interplay between how one experi-
ences self, how one experiences other, how one experiences self-in-
relation-to-other, and how one is experiencing the current interaction with
the other can alter each aspect of the experience. A complementary
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identification has the potential not only to reduce the intensity of one's
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4
Enactment, as the term has come to be generally used, seems to refer to any
undetected unconscious process. Although I focus on the role of complementarity in
the development of certain types of enactments, I do not wish to imply that this is the
exclusive or even principle cause of enactments. Clearly, enactments have multiple
sources and purposes, a discussion of which would go beyond the scope of this article.
5
Throughout this article I am adopting Donna Orange's (1993) term cotrans-
ference to refer to the complex interplay of transference and countertransference,
removing any a priori assumption that the transference develops first and that Ihe
countertransference develops in response to the transference.
712 MERMELSTEIN
ing the attributions of their patients when these attributions are organized
around complementarity and difference plays a significant role in the
cocreation of enactments. Enactments occur as a continuation of the
patent-analyst struggle to position and reposition one another in each of
their relational matrices. The reciprocal nature of complementary process
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often leads to mutual escalation. When self psychologists suggest that the
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Additionally, when the analyst "wears the attribution," there is the opportunity
of discovering the consequences of the attribution instead of getting bagged down in
competing views of reality.
CONCORDANCE AND COMPLEMENTARITY 713
relationship are influenced by the affects that the other experiences as well
as the affects that the other avoids experiencing. An important aspect of
complementarity is that the more that one person avoids some aspect of
experience within the intersubjective field, the more that the other is likely
to experience it.7
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7
In contrast, when there is concordance, both participants concur in their
willingness to embrace certain aspects of their experience and their need to ward off
other aspects of their experience.
8
I thank Susan Sands for her article, which was the springboard for my thinking
about self psychology, projective identification, and Heinrich Racker's work on
counterttansference.
9
See Mermelstein (2000) for a discussion of the centrality and mutuality of
selfobject experience (and its absence) in the listening process.
714 MERMELSTEIN
the negative impact that people can have on each other. All too often, self
psychology reduces negative reactions and experience to byproducts of
fragmentation, which fails to recognize the role that complementary in-
teractions and negative affect can play in the acquisition and maintenance
of self-cohesion.
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10
A notable exception to this is Fosshage's (1995, 1997) use of an "other-
centered listening perspective" to enhance his empathic understanding of patients.
CONCORDANCE AND COMPLEMENTARITY 715
1989, 1992, 1995) and Ogden (1979, 1982, 1989, 1994). Although the
metapsychological thinking and clinical techniques vary substantially, the
clinical material presented tends to emphasize similar pivotal moments in
session when the analyst becomes aware of an experience (a feeling, a
fleeting perception, a fantasy, an idea) that catches his or her attention by
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virtue of its intensity or by it not fitting into the analyst's overall experi-
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11
From a self psychological perspective, it is surmised that were more details
provided about the earlier clinical context of the projective identification sequence, it
would be clear that projective identification occurs as a reaction to a disruption in the
analytic relationship that threatens the patient's psychological functioning. Bacal
(1997) and Powell (1997), for example, both pointed out that projective-identification-
type phenomena tend to occur in response to the analyst's withholding of needed
responsiveness.
CONCORDANCE AND COMPLEMENTARITY 717
12
Although Kleinian analysts seem to be quite willing to provide interpretations
based on this discovered identification, other analysts, such as Sands (1997), a self
psychologist, and Ehrenberg (1992), an interpersonalist, choose instead to disclose
observations of their experience in a noninterpretative manner with the aim of fur-
thering the psychoanalytic dialogue.
718 MERMELSTEIN
We have found that the assumption that the patient wishes the therapist to feel
impotent or infuriated is much more often than not directly contradicted in our
own work. Such wishes, we suggest, occur only when the patient's disagree-
ments, assertions, and primary wishes to have his own subjective experiences
empathically understood have been consistently unresponded to. (p. 114)
13
At the beginning of the movie, the patient is referred to as Mrs. Vogler. Soon
after they move to the summer home, once an intimate attachment has developed
CONCORDANCE AND COMPLEMENTARITY 719
in her 30s, who has become mute and is in need of 24-hr nursing care.
From the beginning, it is clear that Mrs. Vogler is capable of talking, but
refuses to. While caring for Mrs. Vogler, first in the hospital and then at
her doctor's summer home, an intense relationship develops between
caregiver and care receiver. By the end, the caregiver becomes enraged
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shift in the caregiver's mental status and the acting out of rage are
probably what led Kernberg to conclude that the patient's inner life had
been transferred to the caregiver. Indeed the translocation of experience
from patient to nurse is profound. From my perspective, one can only
appreciate diis translocation by studying the details of their evolving
relationship. I begin by discussing concordance and complementarity in
the nurse-patient relationship, followed by a discussion of two areas of
translocation: the transfer of ideation (manifest content) and the transfer of
rage, both traveling from patient to nurse.
From the outset, viewers see a wide range of differences between
Mrs. Vogler and Alma, all of which provide the potential for a comple-
mentary relationship. Mrs. Vogler has chosen to become mute. Alma has
a significant need to connect via conversation. Mrs. Vogler is depressed.
Alma is perky. Mrs. Vogler is at a crisis point in her life, the details of
which become clearer toward the end of the movie. Early in the movie,
Alma describes herself as happily engaged, looking forward to getting
married and having children in addition to enjoying her work. Although
Mrs. Vogler has had a breakdown requiring hospitalization, Alma recog-
nizes the strength (willfulness) required to remain mute and is concerned
that Mrs. Vogler is too "strong" for her. There are differences in socio-
economic class and level of success that contribute to Alma feeling
envious of Mrs. Vogler. There is also an age difference, the significance
of which is not explored.
On first meeting, similarity between Alma and Mrs. Vogler is
strikingly absent. Viewers quickly see complementary process in the way
that Mrs. Vogler's silence intensifies Alma's need for conversation. Mrs.
Vogler is afraid of saying something dishonest and has therefore chosen
not to speak. She looks curiously at Alma, who seems to show no such
concerns. One cannot help but wonder whether Alma's chattiness and
openness provide validation to Mrs. Vogler's belief that human discourse
between Mrs. Vogler and Alma, Mrs. Vogler is referred to by her first name, Elisabeth.
For simplicity, I refer to her as Mrs. Vogler through this discussion.
720 MERMELSTEIN
distance.
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On the surface, it appears that Alma is the caregiver and Mrs. Vogler
the patient. It soon becomes apparent that there is a significant amount of
role confusion and role reversal in their relationship. Although their
relationship appears to depict a psychoanalytic relationship, Mrs. Vogler's
refusal to talk leaves her unsuitable for psychoanalysis as it is generally
practiced. Indeed, Mrs. Vogler's refusal to talk contributes to Alma
becoming the analytic patient. From the beginning of their relationship,
Alma does all of the talking. As their relationship develops, Alma begins
pouring her soul out to Mrs. Vogler who, although not verbally respond-
ing, is clearly listening attentively. From my perspective, Alma has
developed a selfobject transference, primarily idealizing with mirroring
and twinship features. Alma's idealization of Mrs. Vogler is evident in her
repetitive portrayal of Mrs. Vogler as a creative, educated person who is
worldly and experienced. Early in their relationship, Alma says, "I have a
tremendous admiration for artists." Later, Alma tells Mrs. Vogler, "I ought
to be like you." The mirroring aspect of Alma's selfobject transference is
apparent in Alma's appreciation of Mrs. Vogler's attentiveness and re-
sponsiveness toward her. Alma tells her, "It's strange, isn't it? No one has
ever bothered to listen to me like you do now. You're the only person who
has ever listened to me. . . . It feels so warm and nice." The twinship
aspect of Alma's selfobject transference is expressed when Alma tells
Mrs. Vogler about her experience of seeing one of her films, going home,
looking in the mirror and thinking, " . . . we are alike. You are much
prettier, but somehow we are alike. I think I could change myself to be
you." Alma's last sentence suggests that the twinship is not identical and
foreshadows the changes that are yet to occur. At the height of Alma's
selfobject transference, Alma reveals to Mrs. Vogler an evocative story of
infidelity, intense sexual pleasure, and the pain of a subsequent pregnancy
and abortion. Then, during the following morning, Alma reads a letter
written by Mrs. Vogler to her doctor, and the selfobject transference is
shattered:
Alma is taking care of me, spoiling me. I think she is quite fond of me even a
tiny bit in love in a charming way. Besides, it's really funny studying her.
Sometimes she cries over past sins, an orgy with strangers and then an abortion.
CONCORDANCE AND COMPLEMENTARITY 721
is then revealed that Mrs. Vogler's life was apparently going well until she
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right relational setting. A prerequisite for the telling of this story is the
development of a selfobject transference or, more generally, the develop-
ment of safety and the experience of having an attentive listener, prefer-
ably one who is not part of your life and will not pass judgments on your
story or use it against you. Alma has developed such a selfobject trans-
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ference with Mrs. Vogler and is thriving within it. Alma is conflicted about
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the intense pleasure that she experienced during her infidelity. She has
significant pain attached to her pregnancy and resulting abortion. As Alma
weeps, she is physically held and consoled by Mrs. Vogler. They continue
talking until morning. Alma subsequently experiences Mrs. Vogler speak-
ing for the first time and then entering her room after she went to bed,
events Mrs. Vogler later denies. Alma has clearly become more vulnerable
in her relationship with Mrs. Vogler. If Alma did imagine these events, she
may have done so in response to heightened anxiety about her relationship
with Mrs. Vogler and her wish for assurance from Mrs. Vogler about their
attachment.
Less is known about Mrs. Vogler's dynamics because of her mute-
ness. What is known is revealed through her nonverbal behavior, through
the letter that Alma opened, and through her history as it is eventually
presented. In her letter, she reveals that she has been studying Alma. She
refers to Alma as engaging in an orgy with strangers, perhaps "accurate,"
but clearly judgmental and harsh. Mrs. Vogler sees herself as fundamen-
tally different from Alma. Mrs. Vogler uses her perceptions of Alma as a
springboard to feel better about herself and to confirm her isolation.
The basic relational problem is that whereas Alma is benefiting from
the concordance in their relationship, Mrs. Vogler is benefiting from the
complementarity. Alma has organized her subjective experience of her
relationship with Mrs. Vogler so as to highlight their similarity and
resonance, and minimize their differences. Mrs. Vogler, however, has
organized her experience of their relationship in such a way that their
differences are highlighted. The concordance that Alma had experienced
prior to her reading of Mrs. Vogler's letter is shattered when it is revealed
that Mrs. Vogler has been harboring critical judgments of her. The rupture
in their relationship is irreparable. What becomes apparent is that Alma
and Mrs. Vogler were having two different relationships. Although, it is
generally true that participants in a relationship can only experience the
relationship from their own subjectivity, there is usually some common
ground, some overlap in subjectivities, even during times of conflict,
which facilitates the reparation of relational disruptions. Alma and Mrs.
Vogler appear to have diametrically opposed perceptions of what is going
CONCORDANCE AND COMPLEMENTARITY 723
live experience leading up to the writing and nonsealing of her letter, one
can still conjecture that Mrs. Vogler had a wish to provoke Alma into a
fragmented, rageful state. What would be the psychological purpose of
this act?
Recognizing that Mrs. Vogler has a complementary relationship
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with Alma, three hypotheses come to mind. One possibility is that Mrs.
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Vogler was inducing anger in Alma in order to confirm her view of the
world as a hostile, dangerous place in which people cannot be trusted. A
second possibility is that Mrs. Vogler is likely to feel more accepting of
her own anger in the presence of someone who seems to be out of control
with theirs. Both of these possibilities include Mrs. Vogler bringing out
the worst in Alma and then benefiting from her use of Alma as "other." In
the first possibility, Alma is being used to confirm Mrs. Vogler's view of
the world and to confirm the choices that Mrs. Vogler is making in relation
to the world. In the second possibility, Ahna is being used as a point of
comparison to help Mrs. Vogler to feel better about herself. It should be
noted that whereas the expression of Alma's rage is occurring in tandem
with Alma's fragmentation, Alma's rage does not seem to have as dele-
terious an impact on Mrs. Vogler. From my perspective, the relational
dynamic is that there has been a shift toward bilaterally experienced
complementarity. For Alma, who had previously been experiencing con-
cordance, this shift includes the loss of selfobject experience and self-
cohesion. For Mrs. Vogler, the relationship had already shifted to comple-
mentarity or perhaps had been primarily complementary from the outset.
Mrs. Vogler derives self-cohesion through the complementary cotransfer-
ence, and for her the intensification of the complementary cotransference
is not as abrupt, nor does it involve as great a loss.
A third possibility is that Mrs. Vogler is inducing anger in Alma in
order to create psychological distance in response to Alma's expression of
dependency and warmth. In this regard, it is interesting that Mrs. Vogler
appeared so emotionally available during the previous day and that she
begins her comments about Alma in the letter with the remark, "Alma is
taking care of me, spoiling me." She then proceeds to criticize the same
events that the evening before she had responded to so empathically. One
cannot help but wonder whether Mrs. Vogler is pushing Alma away in
response to her own need for intimacy and her subsequent reactions to that
need. I am aware that on this point I am joining Kernberg in his (Kleinian)
perception that Mrs. Vogler is threatened by and needs to spoil that which
is experienced as good.
CONCORDANCE AND COMPLEMENTARITY 725
points.
1. All experience is embedded in relational matrices. The very
embeddedness of experience within a relational matrix requires similarity
and difference. To embed is to relate, which requires comparison. The
basic units of comparison are similarity and difference. All relational
experience has concordant and complementary dimensions that are built
from these essential similarities and differences.
2. Complementarity is so basic, so complex, and so variable that to
try to understand it inevitably leads to generalizations that reduce its
richness. Complementarity exists in many forms. There are innumerable
ways that self and other can be different and many ways to use that
difference. Concordance and sameness are much simpler. Everyone knows
sameness. It is familiar and feels safe (unless it threatens one's sense of
individuality or specialness). In contrast, people are threatened by differ-
ence, especially if it violates their core organizing principles.
3. The essence of complementarity is that when two individuals
relate to one another, there is mutual impact with both individuals orga-
nizing their view of self against the background of how they view other
and self-in-relation-to-other. Although self and other are internal repre-
sentations, they correlate with how individuals experience themselves and
others in the world. The behavior of others can threaten one's organization
of experience. Projective identification type enactments often occur when
an "other" does not cooperate with one's internal world. When one's
relational perspective is not capable of assimilating new experience or of
accommodating to it, one response is to unconsciously attempt to induce
others to act in ways that confirm one's internal world, thus removing the
experience of dissonance.
4. When Atwood and Stolorow (1984) described psychoanalysis "as
a science of the intersubjective, focused on the interplay between the
differently organized subjective worlds of the observer and the observed"
(p. 41), they were creating space for complex forms of experiencing and
interrelating with the other. Complementarity is an essential aspect of how
subjectivities fit together.
5. Concordance relies on similarity as its basic building block.
726 MERMELSTEIN
the two protagonists, which placed the characters in total opposition to one
another and led to an impasse, indeed a hopelessness between them. In the
psychoanalytic encounter, patient and analyst may have the immediate
experience of being polarized, one needing concordance, the other using
complementarity. A closer examination of the history of the cotransfer-
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ence usually reveals that patient and analyst have each used concordant
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