John McGlashan College Essay Writing Guide

Table of Contents
How to use the correct style of language
How to plan -
How to write an introduction
How to structure essay paragraphs
S.E.X.Y Structure
S.E.X.Y Paragraph examples

Building more sophisticated paragraphs - ways to approach this ...

By Linking to another quotation in the text.
By linking to the Historical Context.
By unpacking the connotations of words in the quotation.
By linking to another similar text.
By exploring what it reveals about the human condition
By offering an alternative interpretation.
By offering a personal response - the readers / your feelings
By linking to the author’s purpose
How to write a conclusion

How to use the correct style of language

Click HERE to find out

How to plan -

At Year 11 you should aim for three body paragraphs. At year 12 and above, four. Below is a planning
template you can use to help map out your ideas
 Introduction

Statement Statement Statement

Example Example Example

Explanation Explanation Explanation

You Add You Add You Add

Conclusion

Here’s an example for the following question on Baz Luhrmann’s film Romeo and Juliet

Example - Describe and Important event at or near the beginning of a text.

Explain how this event helped you understand an important idea or ideas
Introduction - Context, Text details, Question details, points you’ll make
Statement Statement
When they realise who Throughout scene (film)
each is, angles and motif of Fairy Lights
music combine
Example Example
High angle of Romeo + Consistently evident
pace, tempo and pitch of through mise en scene,
music lowers after the realisation -
even reinforces by a
twinkling diegetic sound
effect
Explanation Explanation
Totally undermines L is reminding the
previous giddy elation, viewer of fatalism - fte is
showing the threat to ever present in the film,
love that hate is. visually, so we know R &
J cannot escape
You Add You Add
Really Poignant and sad Recalls the words of the
- foreboding and prologue - a pair of star
reminding us of their crossed lovers take their
doomed love. lives
Statement
Highly symbolic
costumes
Example
Juliet - Angel, Romeo -
Knight in Shining
Armour Vs Tybalt - the
Devil
Explanation
The perceptive,
analytical viewer will
unpack this imagery -
Juliet and Romeo and
Suited - they match -
and contrast entirely
with Tybalt -who
represents hatred - the
oppositional force to
love.
You Add
Flamboyant costuming
is typical of Luhrmann’s
directorial style - Strictly
Ballroom for example a
fan of his work, would
quickly recognise the
costume symbolic
layers.
Statement
Dialogue and lighting
change too, once the
realisation occurs
Example
My only love ...
Dark lighting
‘This intrusion ...shall
convert to bitterest gall”
(Tybalt)
Explanation
We again se the clash
between love and hate -
Juliet senses it, and the
dark lighting works as a
pathetic fallacy.
You Add
Especially interesting
the Tybalt gets the last
word in the scene - both
Shakespeare and
Luhrmann remind us of
the threat to Romeo’s
life, further emphasising
how doomed their love
is.
 Conclusion - Throughout this sequence, visual and verbal elements combine to consistently show us how
perilous and doomed Romeo and Juliets new found love is, given their inevitable fate; and the strength of
the hatred that envelops their families

How to write an introduction

Introductions should be structured like this

Analyse how the setting helps to express the ideas in the text

“For Germany, the battle of Stalingrad was the biggest defeat in its history; for Russia, it became its
greatest victory. “Hermann Doerr, German General, post-war memoirs. Stalingrad is the setting at the
core of Jean-Jaques Annaund’s war film Enemy at the Gates, where a young Russian and a Ruthless
german officer partake in a deadly duel. This strategically and symbolically important city is in ruins, all but
destroyed by the brutal, desperate street fighting that characterises this battle. Through this ruin, the theme
of the brutal reality of war is presented evocatively. Annaud adeptly uses camera shots, mise en scene,
music and lighting to present Stalingrad as a setting personifying the brutality of war.

Describe an important idea in the text.

Explain how the writer used particular techniques to show you this was important.

Our language defines how we think, what we believe and even how we dream. Search for my Tongue,
by Sujatta Bhatt, is a fascinating poem exploring the importance of language to identity. The idea that Bhatt
shows us as important is the challenge of living in a culture where you lose your first language so that it
‘rots, rots and dies.’ Bhatt has had to move away from her native country, and is unable to speak in
gujarati. As a result she feels as though she’s lost her ‘mother tongue’ and almost lost a physical part of
her, which makes her disheartened. The poet combines sensual imagery and extended metaphors;
includes a section in gujarati; and plant imagery to show the reader this idea was important.

Describe an important relationship in the text.

Explain why the relationship was important,

Animal Farm, the remarkable satirical allegory, by George Orwell, details the apparent liberation of farm
animals,who come to be betrayed by those who seemed to lead them to freedom. One Important
relationship in this novella, is between Boxer, a hugely powerful carthorse, and Napoleon, the Leader and
Ruler of Animal farm. This relationship is entirely one sided, as Boxer adores Napoleon; and is utterly
ignorant about how he is being manipulated and betrayed. Orwell uses this relationship to show us how
dangerous it is to follow those in power without question; to allegorically show the exploitation of Russian
Workers as part of Stalin’s five year plans, to show us how easy it is for the masses to be corrupted by
propaganda;

Describe and Important event at or near the beginning of a text.

Explain how this event helped you understand an important idea or ideas

People being fated to fall in love who are on different sides of a conflict; different religions, cultures, nations
has been a feature of our collective humanity. Baz Luhrmann’s modern reworking of Shakespeare’s tragedy
Romeo and Juliet the moment that each realises the other is from the household of their mortal enemy,
shortly after they have fallen in love with one another is powerful and poignant. Through the use of visual
features such as camera shots, angles, movement and the inclusion of motifs through the mise en scene;
and verbal features including non-diegetic music and dialogue, Luhrmann creates a powerful scene, which
emphasises the ideas of fatalism and doomed love, all building the tragic momentum of this extraordinary
film.

How to structure essay paragraphs

S.E.X.Y Structure

Statement: State what your paragraph is going to be about - the words of the essay question are helpful -
○ One interesting aspect of the character is ...
○ The place in which the film is set is one aspect of setting that affects the characters
○ Shakespeare’s theme of the corrosive effects of jealousy is his primary concern in Act three

Example: Give a precise detail from the text, usually a quotation

○ Lennie is described as, ‘snorting like a horse’ and having hands like bear’s paws.
○ The director uses establishing shots and blue filters when showing the ruined buildings,
rubble and raging fires in Stalingrad.
○ Iago’s infamous waring is clear proof of this: ‘Beware, my lord, of jealousy, it is the green-
 eyed monster which doth mock the meat it feeds upon.’

xplanation: Explain why that quotation is important - linked to question

○ Steinbeck’s use of animal imagery helps us form a picture of a very strong and very simple
character.
○ This ruined setting is important as it is where our characters are set to go - and the obvious
danger creates tension for the viewer - and a sense of awe at the hardship they are soon to
face.
○ This infamous line clearly presents just how destructive jealousy is - allowing yourself to be
taken by it will result in your quick and absolute destruction

You Add: Add another comment, thought, viewpoint etc on point. See the section on developing more
sophisticated paragraphs below for an example

S.E.X.Y Paragraph examples

Owen’s use of imagery, combines with sound devices

 to make his message yet more powerful, as he describes
a comrade dying from a gas attack. The imagery and
assonance of, ‘he plunges at me, guttering, choking,
drowning,’ and the simile, ‘as under a green sea, I saw
him drowning’ are particularly striking. These lines
emphasize how sickening the death through gassing
was, vividly allowing the reader to see and hear the
soldier’s obscene death. Additionally, the colour
imagery of the green gas which engulfs the soldier,
helps depict the actual colour of the mustard gas used
during such attacks.

Building more sophisticated paragraphs - ways to approach this ...

By Linking to another quotation in the text.

Dreams are a key theme in ‘Of Mice and Men’. The most significant dream is Lennie and
George’s ‘dream farm’ George describes the dream of having, ‘a little house an a couple of
acres and a cow and some pigs…’ where they can ‘Live of the fatta the lan.’ This dream is
important to the men because it offers them hope of a home with some stability, where they
can have some freedom and an easier life than their present, drifting existence.
Additionally, the dream farm offers an escape from the loneliness of their current, drifting
lifestyle - one that has caused so many others in their situation to become isolated and
embittered, victims of the corrosive effects of loneliness because, as George says, ‘Guys like
us that work on ranches are the loneliest guys in the world.’

By linking to the Historical Context.

Dreams are a key theme in ‘Of Mice and Men’. The most significant dream is Lennie and
George’s ‘dream farm’ George describes the dream of having, ‘a little house an a couple of
acres and a cow and some pigs…’ where they can ‘Live of the fatta the lan.’ This dream is
important to the men because it offers them hope of a home with some stability, where they
can have some freedom and an easier life than their present, drifting existence. This is
particularly pertinent in the historical context of the novel, the Great Depression in America
of the 1930s, where and estimated 27.9% of the workforce were unemployed, and therefore
unable to sustain themselves, and forced into continually moving to pick up whatever
itinerant work was available.

By unpacking the connotations of words in the quotation.

Dreams are a key theme in ‘Of Mice and Men’. The most significant dream is Lennie and
George’s ‘dream farm’ George describes the dream of having, ‘a little house an a couple of
acres and a cow and some pigs…’ where they can ‘Live of the fatta the lan.’ This dream is
important to the men because it offers them hope of a home with some stability, where they
can have some freedom and an easier life than their present, drifting existence. The image
of the ‘fatta of the lan’ has connotations of plenty and richness; an idyllic environment
where the friends’ own home provides them with all they could ask for to sustain them -
indeed more - such a way from the lifestyle currently forced upon them.

By linking to another similar text.

Dreams are a key theme in ‘Of Mice and Men’. The most significant dream is Lennie and
George’s ‘dream farm’ George describes the dream of having, ‘a little house an a couple of
acres and a cow and some pigs…’ where they can ‘Live of the fatta the lan.’ This dream is
important to the men because it offers them hope of a home with some stability, where they
can have some freedom and an easier life than their present, drifting existence. This is a
theme that Steinbeck also explores in his novel The Grapes of Wrath, which tells the story of
the Joads, a family with a dream as modest as George and Lennie’s, The Joads leave the
Oklahoma dust-bowl during the depression in order to pursue their dream of a self-sufficient
existence, “livin’ off the fatta the lan’” in California.

By exploring what it reveals about the human condition

Dreams are a key theme in ‘Of Mice and Men’. The most significant dream is Lennie and
George’s ‘dream farm’ George describes the dream of having, ‘a little house an a couple of
acres and a cow and some pigs…’ where they can ‘Live of the fatta the lan.’ This dream is
important to the men because it offers them hope of a home with some stability, where they
can have some freedom and an easier life than their present, drifting existence. Here,
Steinbeck is exploring fundamental aspects of the human condition: our basic human need
for hope and our desperation for security. As humans, an absence of hope and a lack of
security easily leads to despair, and as such, the reader can readily empathise with George
and Lennie’s desires.

By offering an alternative interpretation.

Dreams are a key theme in ‘Of Mice and Men’. The most significant dream is Lennie and
George’s ‘dream farm’ George describes the dream of having, ‘a little house an a couple of
acres and a cow and some pigs…’ where they can ‘Live of the fatta the lan.’ Perhaps this
dream is important to the men because it offers them hope of a home with some stability,
where they can have some freedom and an easier life than their present, drifting existence
Alternatively, its ‘garden of eden’ connotations may suggest it offers them a quasi-religious
‘paradise’ to fantasise about and therefore escape the dreary difficulties of their situation.

By offering a personal response - the readers / your feelings

Dreams are a key theme in ‘Of Mice and Men’. The most significant dream is Lennie and
George’s ‘dream farm’ George describes the dream of having, ‘a little house an a couple of
acres and a cow and some pigs…’ where they can ‘Live of the fatta the lan.’ This dream is
important to the men because it offers them hope of a home with some stability, where they
can have some freedom and an easier life than their present, drifting existence. This longing
our protagonists have is quite poignant, the reader is moved by their dream, as simple as it
seems. We hope, as George and Lennie do, that they’ll attain their small ‘American Dream’
but enough foreshadowing is evident, for us to be quite fearful too.

By linking to the author’s purpose

Dreams are a key theme in ‘Of Mice and Men’. The most significant dream is Lennie and
George’s ‘dream farm’ George describes the dream of having, ‘a little house an a couple of
acres and a cow and some pigs…’ where they can ‘Live of the fatta the lan.’ This dream is
important to the men because it offers them hope of a home with some stability, where they
can have some freedom and an easier life than their present, drifting existence. Part of
Steinbeck’s purpose is social criticism - he wishes to show how hard society is for those who
are vulnerable - how society offers little protection and security for them; and his
sympathetic portrayal of the men shows us he believes it should.

How to write a conclusion

A conclusion does the same as the introduction, but in the opposite order.
It is also a good idea to begin with an appreciation of the quality of the text

● Sign Post Phrase

● Appreciation of power
● Sums up the main points
● Draws together the argument
● Finishes with a powerful, broad statement.

In conclusion, it is clear that Romeo and Juliet is a powerful and timeless story, and that this reworking of it
is very effective in capturing that power. This is most clear at the party, where Luhrmann combines a range
of verbal and visual features to masterfully weave movements, shots. angles and sound to create a
poignant, moving scene. Here we see that our two ‘Star Cross’d Lovers’ are destined to fall in love - having
no control over this, due to the power of fate. The ever present spectre of violence, due to the conflict, and
the presence of the rage-filled Tybalt, clearly conveys the sense that the doomed love of Romeo and Juliet
is under threat, and will eventually be destroyed by the hatred that exists within their families. In Romeo
and Juliet, hatred will destroy love. Tragic indeed.