Jah Zela A.

Lagamon 26YP4

The Essence of Knowing

In the story Dive In, we have seen the struggle Nick and Kristen are facing as a young
adult. The desire they felt to each other was new, and they didn't know how to handle it because
they don't have any knowledge about it, Nick just knows that he was told not to do it, but he
didn't know what the reason was. For Kristen, she's lost and bothered, she didn't know if what
they feel for each other is love, and if the physical attraction they have is becoming the center of
their relationship. At home, her family taught her to find true love. The problem is they didn't
teach her how to.

I think the three reasons the teens asked the same question with Nick and can't answer
them because first, as a teenager we tend to be ashamed to ask guidance from our parents and
family about matters like the desires we feel, and they just tell teenagers not to do it but not the
reason why they shouldn't do it. The topic is a bit uncomfortable to talk about, so the teenagers
would often keep it to themselves than to open up with their families, or sometimes they seek
advice from friends and that advice is often misleading or worsens the situation because they
give wrong advice like just what happened to Kristen her friends told her that it is ok because
they love each other. No proper guidance from families might have an effect on teenagers to be
lost.

Secondly, our world is now advanced, and the past is far more different from the present
now. Teenagers now are into fun and excitement, explore things, and the thrill to satisfy their
curiosity. This is one of the reasons because teenagers are now impulsive with their decision that
results in situations that they regret afterward, and that makes them question themselves on what
they have done. The choices they make lead them to be lost and don't know how to deal, answer,
and solve these problems. Like for doing the sexual act, because of the curiosity, teenagers don't
know how to handle what they dive in to, and so they would often question themselves after the
act.

Lastly, the reason for the lack of sexual awareness, most schools don't teach their
students about this properly because of the reason that it is sensitive, and some Christian schools
think it is inappropriate. They don't tend to imply forums and symposiums about sex education
that results in teenagers having a lack of knowledge about doing the deed. I think schools are the
ground also to learn about these things, and they should also be the way for the children to learn
that sex is done right after marriage.

For the parents to help their children with this question, they should be open-minded with
the situation. They should not let their children feel ashamed to ask these questions. Maybe they
should also try approaching their children and open up first with the situation and tell them the
reason and not just why they shouldn't do it. It is the parents' responsibility to guide their
children properly because the parent is our first teacher when it comes to everything. The one
key to solving this problem is communication.

The given question in this essay, what should Nick do with the desires he feels even
though he's not married yet? Should he ignore them or give in? For me, he should avoid giving in
to his desires and wait for the right time, and the right time is after marriage. If you purely love
someone, you learn the art of waiting, and the reason you are in a relationship is love, not the
desires you feel; you love a person for who they are not because they can fulfill your desires. We
know that feeling of desire is normal and it is not just a feeling, the desire we have is a gift from
God, but it would be a good thing if it is used in the proper time, and it is in marriage, that we
make ourselves a gift to our partners. At some point, we can't really avoid being tempted in these
desires, so what should you do? Jesus also faced temptations here on earth, and every time he
would face those, he would pray to God, and that helped him get over it. Just like Jesus, we
human beings, we can render our struggles to God through prayers.

Sources:

Bolin, J. (2009, July 30). The Spousal Meaning of the Body and Vocation. Retrieved from
https://www.pathsoflove.com/blog/2009/07/spousal-meaning-of-the-body-and-vocation/

Noroozi, M., Taleghani, F., Merghati-Khoei, E. S., Tavakoli, M., & Gholami, A. (2014, July).
Premarital sexual relationships: Explanation of the actions and functions of family. Retrieved
from https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4145500/

Is Sexual Desire Holy? (2014, November 10). Retrieved from

https://www.crisismagazine.com/2014/sexual-desire-holy

Scott, P., Justine, Justine, Justine, Laura, Williams, C., … Collins. (2020, March 8). How to
Control Sexual Desires When Single: Tips on Purity. Retrieved from
https://www.justinemfulama.com/single/control-sexual-desires/