STAY, TALK, GO

What do healthy relationships look like to you?

Lesson created to utilize with 11th & 12th grade students who attend the Student Achievement
Center at Shelbyville High School. Could be adapted to multiple grade levels.

OPENING QUESTIONS
● What traits/behaviors do you look for in a dating partner?
● What are your deal breakers in a relationship?

ACTIVITY DIRECTIONS
● Each student receives three laminated pieces of paper: one red, one green, one yellow.
● Explain that each student will raise the piece of paper they associate with the scenario
when read.
○ Red = Go; that’s a dealbreaker and you would leave the relationship
○ Yellow = Talk; you would want to talk about it before staying or going
○ Green = Stay; the scenario is not a dealbreaker for you

SCENARIOS
● As you go through the scenarios, allow for discussion. Prompt students to explain their
reasoning.
○ What I’ve found is that students prefer particulars, such as how long have we
been dating?
○ f they raise a yellow card, what would the conversation look like? What would you
want to ask them?

1. You always feel like your partner’s wishes and goals come first.
○ How would you approach the conversation? What would you say? “You never
listen to my dreams” vs “I love that you have a goal to do x, and I support you. I
feel like my dreams/goals are overlooked.”
2. Your partner calls you a name that you don’t like but stops using it once you correct
them.
○ What if they kept using it in a teasing manner? What is the root?
3. When you and your partner have a disagreement, your partner uses the silent treatment
for days.
4. You go on a weekend vacation with your family. Throughout the trip, your partner texts
you all the time and gets mad when you don’t text back right away. This behavior has
been going on for months even when you speak up and try to explain how it makes you
feel.
 5. Your partner told you they couldn’t hang out this Friday, but then they go out with their
friends. You only find out because of a post on social media.
6. Your partner says they need your social media passwords or they are breaking up with
you.
○ Why are you asking for their social media passwords?
7. You have a bad day and your partner isn’t at school. You feel like they are never there to
talk.
8. Your partner expects you to spend time with their family, but they always seem to have
excuses when it comes to hanging out with your family.
9. Your partner is at a party and kisses someone else.

STUDENTS: IT’S YOUR TURN!

● Groups of 3-4 get a notecard and they have to come up with their own scenario for stay,
talk go. Maybe some they or a friend have struggled with in a relationship.
● The group reads the scenario outloud and again the students raise a red, yellow, or
green card.

ENDING DISCUSSION/WRAP UP
● What are signs of a healthy relationship?
● What are signs of an unhealthy relationship?
● Pass out relationships exist on a spectrum paper found. Have students look at the
diagram together. ​https://www.loveisrespect.org/dating-basics/relationship-spectrum/
○ What parts of the diagram do you question, if any?
○ How could this diagram be beneficial to your peers?
● If you could go back in time, what advice would you give middle school you about
relationships?