To Marry, or Not to Marry: Be Guided by God’s

Prescriptions.

God wants man to always choose what is good, abide by His teachings, and observe the dos and
don’ts that He had outlined so that man may live a peaceful, safe, and blissful life. However, He
is neither coercing man to do what He wants nor is He curtailing man’s freedom of choice. And
yet, God reveals the advantages and benefits that man will gain if he chooses to follow His will. 

And like a father who wants nothing but the best for his children, God never fails to give man
His prescriptions and recommendations which he could use as a guide in making choices and
decisions in life, especially when it comes to serious matters such as finding a spouse and getting
married, for instance. 

Marriage is an option given to every man and woman. Those who want to build a family of their
own can always choose to get married — but those who want to pursue a tranquil, unperturbed,
and godly life can always opt to stay unmarried. But if they choose to get married, it is important
that they first consult the prescriptions of God written in the Bible concerning this matter so that
they wouldn’t commit a mistake that they will regret later on. 

As far as the woman is concerned, the Bible says that if she wants a life with lesser worries and
responsibilities, and if she wants a kind of life that is without distraction in her service to God, it
is better for her not to marry. Why? Because being married is a 24/7 career; it will require so
much of her time. And once she is married, she can no longer devote as much time as she wants
to serving God. She will be torn between her duties to God and her duties to her husband and
children.

Unlike an unmarried woman who thinks mostly of things concerning godliness and holiness, a
married woman is beleaguered by the cares of this world. So, for her not to be distracted by such
things, the Bible recommends that she remains a maiden.

1 CORINTHIANS 7:32-35 (KJV) says,

32 But I would have you without carefulness. He that is unmarried careth for the things that
belong to the Lord, how he may please the Lord: 
33 But he that is married careth for the things that are of the world, how he may please his wife. 
34 There is difference also between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman careth for the
things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit: but she that is married careth
for the things of the world, how she may please her husband. 
35 And this I speak for your own profit; not that I may cast a snare upon you, but for that which
is comely, and that ye may attend upon the Lord without distraction. 

In a typical household, the husband assumes the role of a breadwinner, but it is the wife who gets
the heavier share of the burden. She is the one who conceives and carries the baby in her tummy
for nine months; after nine months, she gives birth; and in giving birth, her life is put in great
danger. And after giving birth, she breastfeeds and watches over her child throughout the day, et
cetera, et cetera. Practically, the tasks that a mother has to fulfill never ends. This is yet without
mentioning her duties as a wife to her husband and as a keeper of their house.

With her heavy workload every day, she’ll definitely find difficulty in allotting time to spend in
serving God. But if she will choose to abide by God’s prescription — if she will choose to
remain a maiden — she will be spared from a very taxing life and she will be able to serve God
freely.

This particular prescription of God is also recommended to the man. If he also wants to spare
himself from the troubles of being the head of the family — such as earning money to pay for his
children’s tuition fees, buying milk and diapers for the baby, and paying rent, loans, and other
household bills. And if he wants to serve the Lord wholeheartedly, it is best that he remains a
bachelor, like the Apostle Paul.

Sometimes, there are special people like the Apostle Paul, who have been appointed by God to
perform a special function. In the case of Paul, he allowed the will of God and not his personal
choice to prevail in his life. Although apostles were not prohibited from getting married, the
Apostle Paul chose to remain unmarried because he wanted to fulfill his function and
responsibilities more faithfully and without hindrance. He also wanted to devote his whole life in
serving the Lord — which he wouldn’t have been able to do if he had a wife and children to
attend to.

GALATIANS 1:13-15 (KJV)

13 For ye have heard of my conversation in time past in the Jews' religion, how that beyond
measure I persecuted the church of God, and wasted it: 
14 And profited in the Jews' religion above many my equals in mine own nation, being more
exceedingly zealous of the traditions of my fathers. 
15 But when it pleased God, who separated me from my mother's womb, and called me by his
grace, 

Actually, even while Paul was still in the womb of his mother, God had already preordained him
to be an apostle. And when the appointed time for his apostleship came, he gladly submitted
himself to the will of God.

Like the Apostle Paul, God had also intended Jeremiah for another special function as early as
the time when he was still in the womb of his mother. God had preordained Jeremiah to be a
prophet unto the nations.

But other than these few exceptional cases, people are free to choose the kind of life that they
want. They are free to get married, if they want; they are also free to remain unmarried if that is
their choice. And should they decide to get married, it is best that they consider God’s
prescriptions and recommendations first.

First of all, it is important that the man, or the woman, is able to choose the right person who
would become his or her lifetime partner. They have to make sure that they fall in love with the
right person. Why? Because the devil is also urging people to fall in love, but he is urging them
to love the wrong person — even someone who is already married. Do not believe what others
say that once Cupid hits you with his arrow that goes straight to your heart, you become blinded
by love and that you’ll fall in love even with a married man or woman. That is nonsense. In the
first place, Cupid is not real; he only exists in mythology. Making a person fall in love with
somebody who is already married is not Cupid’s work but the devil’s. And if you yield to the
devil’s provocation, you’ll end up becoming a homewrecker and an immoral.

God also does not want you to marry an ill-tempered person; in fact, God does not even want
you to associate with or to befriend somebody who has a bad temper or someone who is always
angry or furious. He wants you to stay away from those kinds of people because they could
influence you badly. 

PROVERBS 22:24-25 (KJV) says,

24 Make no friendship with an angry man; and with a furious man thou shalt not go: 
25 Lest thou learn his ways, and get a snare to thy soul.

Actually, this quality is not only seen among men as there are also women who are hot-tempered
and are always contending and arguing with others. 

PROVERBS 21:19 (KJV)

It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman.

So, if you see that your girlfriend is quarrelsome and is always disputing with you, better back
off. Otherwise, you’ll find no peace in life if she becomes your wife. And you cannot just
abandon her or drive her away when she becomes very annoying and hard to deal with.

It is against the will of God that husband and wife separate. Marriage should be lasting — it
should withstand the test of time and it should endure all difficulties. For these to happen, the
husband-wife relationship should be founded on genuine love and on God’s teachings. And the
contracting parties in marriage should be made aware that their relationship is lifetime and only
death can draw them apart.

If in other churches a marriage can be annulled or can be declared null and void, in the true
Church of God, marriage is a lifelong commitment and a marriage contract never loses its
efficacy. It only expires when one of them dies.

And since we in the Church of God international do not permit couples to separate, we see to it
first that the man and the woman who want to get married truly love each other — that they are
ready to adjust to one another considering the fact that they have different family backgrounds
and they were brought up differently; that they are ready to face challenges and problems that
may come their way; and that they will stand by each other at all times and will remain faithful
to one another all the days of their lives. And if ever problems and conflicts arise in the course of
their married life, we also help them in preserving their marriage. We help them patch things up
and resolve their issues using the word of God because it is God’s will that husbands and wives
stay together until the end. 

We can say that in everything that we do and in every choice and decision that we make, it is
always to our advantage if we will be guided and if we will follow the will of God. We can also
say that the wiser way of using our free will or our freedom of choice is by choosing to follow
God’s prescription, be it in marriage or in other aspects of life. Always remember, God knows
what is best for us — and He wants no less than the best for us.

To God be the glory!