Beruflich Dokumente
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T H E C O M M U N I T Y
LETTER
www.theletteronline.com VOLUME 22, ISSUE 3 • MARCH 2011
Daniel Mason
(502) 966-5178
4610 Outer Loop
Louisville
danielcmason@allstate.com
© 2009 Allstate Insurance Company allstate.com
Louisville
Tattoo Arts Convention
March 18th - 20th 2011
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REGULAR CONTRIBUTORS
Cubbie Britches
Mike Buford
Marie Davis
Lesbian Couple Sues Next-Door Neighbor For Alleged Arson
James Hensley by Out & About Newspaper Staff
Margaret Hults
Eric Jost A lesbian couple in Tennessee whose The complaint does allege taunts made to her house.”
Michael Kimmel home was burned to the ground last by Millsaps that specifically targeted the The Stuttes, who have been together
Holly Knight
Bryn Marlow September has filed a lawsuit against a Stuttes’ sexual orientation: for more than 15 years, moved to Vonore,
George Morrison next-door neighbor who they believe set For example, a month before the fire, Tenn. from Oklahoma in June 2005. Police
Beth Ann Rubin the fire. on August 4, they allege, Millsaps, reports state that for years before the fire,
Brian Rzepczynski The couple in question, Carol Ann whose double wide mobile home rests Carol Ann and Laura were harassed by
Ren Scheuerman
David Williams
Stutte and partner Laura Stutte, were about 20 feet from the gate leading to Millsaps, but no arrests were made.
on a visit to Nashville when the incident the Stuttes’ property, approached them In the complaint against Millsaps, the
DISTRIBUTION TEAM: happened on Saturday, September 4. as they stopped to close their front Stuttes are seeking a total of $880,000,
Derrick, Cheese, Gerald, They returned to find their house was gate. She poked at the Stuttes, alleges which includes damages for intentional
Hazel, Laura, Marie & James. burned to the ground and the word the complaint, and asked them, “Do infliction of emotional distress and
Publication of the name, photograph "queers" spray painted on the side of you know what is better than one dead malicious harassment.
or likeness of any person, organization, their garage. queer? Two dead queers.” The complaint Copyright 2011, Out & About
or business in articles or advertising
in THE COMMUNITY LETTER or on its According to a report published in the notes that she then threatened to burn Newspaper. All rights reserved.
companion websites is not to be Knoxville-based pulication Metro Pulse, their house down, laughed, and returned Reprinted with permission.
construed as an indication of the
sexual orientation of such person,
organization or business.
-JDFOTFEJO,FOUVDLZBOE*OEJBOB
0ĊFSJOHXPSMEXJEFSFMPDBUJPOBTTJTUBODF
Bryan Gatewood
Attorney
502.584.3300
231 South Fifth Street, Suite 200
Family Law • Estate Planning • Professional Small Business
Charitable Planning • Debtor/Creditor
www.johnsongatewood.com
We are a debt relief agency. We help people file for bankruptcy under the bankruptcy law.
Louisville AIDS Walk: A Fundraiser In Need Of Some New Ideas by Dave VanderPol, Executive Editor
Brad Hampton announced in early February that he First, it is time to “Think Outside The Walk”. Fundraising walks for any number
had decided to no longer continue to serve as Director of of non-profit organizations and causes, not just those that benefit HIV/AIDS services,
the Louisville AIDS Walk. The annual event is the region’s are no longer as successful as they were 10 or 20 years ago when they were considered
longest-running HIV/AIDS fund raiser. I suppose I’m new and novel. So it is time to “diversify” the means used to raise money. I would
prejudiced here, but Brad’s decision to step down makes encourage ASCC to offer the community several (at least three or four) fund raising
me sad and very concerned. I can’t imagine anyone events throughout the year in addition to the Walk. Since the Walk no longer seems
more passionate about this cause, let alone anyone more capable of supplying all of the funds needed by member agencies, it seems to me that
knowledgeable in our community who could step into more events are needed to make up the shortfall.
this important role. Indeed Brad leaves some mighty big THE COMMUNITY LETTER, the longest-running media sponsor of the Louisville
shoes to fill. AIDS Walk, will be glad to step up and host at least two new annual events to support
Let me make it crystal clear: I have nothing less than the ASCC. Specifically this newspaper is willing to organize and offer the community
the utmost respect for all of Brad’s hard work on behalf a Chili Cook-Off fundraiser and an Art Show.
of the Walk over the past several years. When it comes to The second suggestion I have is that the Louisville AIDS Walk, in order to increase
all of his work to promote safe sex as well as fund raising the profitability of the event, should no longer include the Clark Memorial Bridge
and advocacy on the part HIV/AIDS, Brad Hampton is as part of its route. Sure, the official slogan of the fundraiser is “A Bridge of Hope
the best of the best in Metro Louisville. Period. Since 1993”, but it is time for the “bridge” to go!
At the same time it is no secret that the Louisville AIDS I’ve been told that it costs several thousands of dollars to use the bridge. I’ve also
Walk, like most AIDS Walks elsewhere in the United heard that the Walk has to pay several hundreds of dollars to both Metro Louisville
States, has experienced a decline in financial support in and Jeffersonville to cover the cost of police security at both ends of the bridge. Is the
recent years. Among the reasons making it harder for bridge really necessary to the success of the Walk? Other annual fund raising Walks
Walks to raise money include the lingering effect that the that take place in Louisville – some of them raising more money than traditionally
deep economic recession continues to have on most non- raised by the Louisville AIDS Walk – do not include the bridge as part of their route.
profit organizations. I’ve also witnessed a growing sense So is this expensive piece of overhead really need to assure a successful event?
of apathy towards anything to do with HIV/AIDS (including support of HIV/AIDS By holding the Walk in just downtown Louisville (or Cherokee Park or elsewhere
fundraising events), coupled with an increased level of denial among younger gay the Highlands neighborhood?) more money raised by the Walk would be made
men about the very real growing (NOT declining) numbers of individuals affected available to member agencies, meaning more money could go for the growing need
and infected by HIV. In 2010 one Louisville-based provider of medical care for person to fund client services. I realize that at least one ASCC agency is based in southeastern
infected with HIV added an average of 10 new clients per month. By the last few Indiana, so use of the bridge certainly has symbolic significance. But the high cost
months of 2010 they were averaging an increase of 10 new patients per week! So the involved in using the bridge likely outweighs the value of this symbolism.
need for assistance is not only very real, it is growing by astronomical proportions
here in Kentuckiana!
Here are a few suggestions that I believe will help the AIDS Service Center Coalition Agree or disagree, Dave VanderPol would love to know your thoughts! Write to him at editor@
(ASCC), the sponsor of the Walk, to experience an increase in financial support from theletteronline.com or call (502) 419-2597.
the community.
"I Want Him Back . . . NOW!" by Dr. Brian Rzepczynski, D.H.S., M.S.W.
Q: I tend to be a possessive person and these projections pop out. actually hear from him again. Instead,
have a hard time trusting my partners. I’m As far as your current separation start living your life and moving on—
not sure where this insecurity comes from, but from your boyfriend, it’s important to don’t put it on hold. And if you happen to
I’ve been burned pretty badly in the past from realize that we can’t “make” someone do hear from him…bonus!
prior lovers who cheated on me. I’ve recently something; we only have control over our Another option would be to send him
started dating someone new for the past couple own behavior. His decision about whether an e-mail or give him a call as a way to
of months. Between me not being able to trust to reconcile with you is not within your check-in since some time has gone by
him and his own religious beliefs of not having control and any efforts on your part to and he’s been on your mind. Use this as
sex until marriage (we’d been having it all try and exert too much influence might an opportunity to express how much the
along), he decided he needed a break. It’s been be met with resistance. If he doesn’t want relationship meant to you and that you
a week now and I still haven’t heard from him. to be together at this time, it’s important miss spending time with him. Ask how
I told him I would wait for him to contact me, to respect his request for space so as not he’s doing and acknowledge the challenges
but I really miss him and want this to work the relationship. This is a great thing and to alienate him and blow any chances for that existed in the relationship before,
out. What should I do? can definitely help you moving forward the two of you to work things out if that acknowledging and taking responsibility
with future involvements. Jealousy and possibility exists. for your part in the difficulties.
A: I’m sorry to hear about the parting of possessiveness can surely kill a budding So one option is to do nothing and wait You could also express a validation and
the ways between you and your boyfriend romance and I encourage you to keep the for him to contact you. Don’t pine for him, respect for his value in holding off on sex
but want to applaud you for having the momentum going by doing what you can, however, as you are then placing all your to help him feel acknowledged, heard, and
maturity, insight, and self-awareness to perhaps by working with a counselor, to hopes and expectations for happiness on understood. If you’re feeling particularly
recognize issues within yourself about learn how to manage insecurity and build the fate of whatever happens with him daring, you could solicit his feedback and
some of your own personal contributions trust so that future love connections won’t and that certainly is not a dependency you (See GAY LOVE DOCTOR,
to some of the issues that were present in run the risk of being sabotaged when want to have, particularly if you never continued on pg 14)
LOUIS PHILPOTT
4033 Taylorsville Road
Louisville, KY 40220
Hawaii Legislature, cont’d from pg 3 reciprocal beneficiaries law). Others population estimates from the 2010
(including at least MD and NY, U.S. Census, as of February 2011,
partnership; Hawaii will make it
seven. Five more states (Hawaii and probably NM and, for some more than 40% of the United States
plus CO, ME, MD and WI) offer purposes RI) respect marriages population resides in a jurisdiction
more limited protections through and/or non-marriage statuses that offering same-sex couples at least
a non-marriage status (the Hawaii same-sex couples entered into in some form of state-level legal
bill does not change the state’s other states. Consequently, based on protection.
GAY LOVE DOCTOR, cont’d from pg 13 effort. If you bank too much on this lesson and get some counseling for
and you don’t hear from him or if working through these issues to help
thoughts on the possibility of the you receive a “no” or a negative maximize your chances of success
two of you spending time together response, this could actually do next time.
with a prohibition against sex so more harm than good for yourself
you can work on building other by triggering more anger and hurt ©2008 Brian L.
and reinforcing your patterns of Rzepczynski, All rights
foundational parts of a relationship
while respecting his value on mistrust in men. Make sure your reserved. To sign up
for the FREE Gay Love
What Path Calls You?
holding off on intimacy. Offer this as motives are in the right place and Coach Newsletter
a gentle invitation, putting the ball in that you’re emotionally in a good filled with dating and
his court. If he bites, great! Proceed place to handle a rejection if it were relationship tips and
slowly from there on out if he wants to possibly come your way, otherwise skills for gay singles
to give it a second chance. it might be best to just keep moving and couples, as well as
If you choose the latter option, it’s forward and view this relationship to check out current coaching
very important that you not place opportunity that you had had groups, programs, and teleclasses, clamourunderbridge.typepad.com
any expectation of outcome on your with him as a valuable learning visit www.TheGayLoveCoach.com.
Urho & Me: Two Peas In A Pod? Two Grasshoppers On A Stick? by Bryn Marlow
Every March 16 when I was a teen, insight of a depth not offered by my ethnic But it's been a long time since I made
my mother and I went all out. We background or religious upbringing. liver pudding, waved the white flag
strung streamers in Nile green and Who was I? How was I to know? One with the light blue cross, bought another
royal purple from doorways. We feasted after another, I watched the touchstones grasshopper figurine.
on liver pudding, cranberry whip and of my life topple. According to legend, St. Urho drove
other Finnish delicacies. We exchanged Down went my identity as husband, the grasshoppers out of the vineyards of
homemade greeting cards. We donned every-day father to my children, church Finland, saving the grape harvest and
purple and green ribbons; clothing in that leader, church member, employed securing a name for himself. In Menaga,
color combination was hard to come by professional, good son, beloved brother, Minnesota stands a huge statue of the
in the 1970s. I made posters for the wall, tacit believer in the legal system, qualified fearsome saint, a grasshopper speared
grasshoppers holding signs that read, renter, upstanding citizen, acceptable on his pitchfork. I have often enough
“Hoppy St. Urho's Day.? person. made pilgrimage there. The town holds
I carried my celebrations over to I came to see myself in new ways, as an annual St. Urho's Day festival parade.
school. Shoving my Finnish heritage in a member of an oppressed minority, Some participants dress up like the saint;
the face of anyone who stood near was part of a creative wellspring of people others go as grasshoppers.
one way I tried to explain myself. I knew who as long as life have lived on the Saint Urho's story parallels that of
I was not like others; St. Urho's Day gave fringe, outside the pale, and added to the Patrick, who reputedly drove the snakes
me opportunity to celebrate my being richness and texture of society. This on a out of Ireland, and for good reason. Folks
different, to pretend this quality was good day. Some mornings I swallowed in northern Minnesota dreamed up the
rooted in my ethnic heritage. The rest whole the message that I was outcast, legend of St. Urho as a kind of spoof. Why
of the time, I used being the best-ever other, a worthless piece of crap, repulsive, should the Irish have all the fun? The
church boy as lid and lever to repress any dirty, loser, liar, sick-o, sinner, a threat to story caught on—any excuse for a party,
hint that I was attracted to the “wrong? my children. for ethnic pride, for another mid-March
gender. I did not wish to know this about My wife and I took them to Sunday Talk about identity crisis. celebration in a cold climate.
myself. School, Sunday services, Wednesday Who am I, anyway? Who are you? Even as I'm wearing my purple and
At the Christian college I attended I night prayer meetings and more. Are we all and only what and who we green sweater this March 16, I'll wonder
roomed with a man who was as rabidly From my earliest years, religion had say we are, who others tell us we are? to what degree St. Urho and I are
Swiss as I was Finnish. We got into a helped me make sense of life, of who I What comprises our identity? I live these constituted of the same stuff. How real are
knock-down-drag-out wrestling match was, where I was headed. My religious questions every day – we? How useful the identities we attach
when he stole my Finnish flag. On March faith and Finnish heritage were part of Sundays, Wednesday nights and March to ourselves? How long-lasting?
16 I made a big poster, “Proud to be me, blood and bone. 16 included.
Finnish,? and plastered it over his bed. No one was more surprised than me I never thought I'd identity as anything
When my children were born, I often when I came out in middle age, in mid- other than Christian, never dreamed Bryn Marlow (gayfeather.blogspot.com) lives
sang them the Finnish lullaby my mother marriage, in the midst of the religious, I'd live outside the church's embrace, with his husband Dave on a 1930s Indiana
sang to me. They'd have to get used to conservative rural Midwest. Identifying yet I have developed a deep mistrust of farmstead where they raise chickens and
having a father who was not run-of-the- as gay helped me understand why I organized religion. I thought my Finnish flowers.
mill. I hoped they'd like liver. And church. had felt so different all my life. This was roots would always be front and center.
“You do an eclectic celebration of the dance! You do Fosse, Fosse, Fosse! You do Martha Graham, Martha Graham,
Martha Graham! Or Twyla, Twyla, Twyla! Or Michael Kidd, Michael Kidd, Michael Kidd, Michael Kidd!
Or Madonna, Madonna, Madonna!. . . but you keep it all inside.”
-- Armand Goldman (portrayed by Robin Williams in the 1996 film THE BIRDCAGE)
Strapped
A routine trick at a man’s apartment propels a cynical hustler into a series of strange and life-
changing encounters in this stunningly photographed drama from San Francisco-based Joseph
Graham. Tall and lanky with a mop of unruly dark hair, the young man makes for an attractive
prostitute – handsome in body, amiable in personality and efficient in sex. While he’s just out to
make a buck, one guy at a time, this coldly efficient rent boy begins to look at himself in a different
way one stormy night when he finds himself lost in a maze-like apartment building.
The evening begins with a tryst with a beefy but timid man unused to gay sex. Their “session”
becomes surprisingly tender for both. But time is money, and he’s off – that is, he’d be off if he
could find the exit. His unexpected odyssey leads him to a series of encounters: there is one with a
“straight” guy with issues; a cocaine-fueled queen who thinks he knows him; an older man, hidden
away in a leaky attic apartment who assists him on his journey; and a lonely young man who thinks
he’s finally found a connection with someone. Sex is the commonality, but out of that commodity
comes raw, unguarded emotions for all, even for the hustler.
Sad, funny, sexy and touching, Strapped is an unforgettable look into one young man’s moving
journey to understanding.
Strapped is available for rent at Wild & Woolly Video, 1021 Bardstown Road in Louisville. So be
sure to call ahead to make sure this popular movie is available. You can also call ahead to ask that it
be reserved for you at the checkout counter: (502) 473-0969.
DINING OUT
but our party of four was lucky enough Yogurt dipping sauce ($9) and a Hummus Cookie Dough Ice Cream ($6), Peaches
native, Beth Ann and her family live just south of
Louisville's Highlands neighborhood. A talented
to walk in on a Saturday night without a and Roasted Vegetable Sandwich also and Crème Crepes ($6) and a Chocolate cook in her own right, over the years her baked
wait. But the restaurant was still bustling. served in Flatbread ($9) among some of Lava Cake served with Ice Cream ($7).
goods have earned her numerous awards at the
Kentucky State Fair.
Varanese has an extensive wine list and a the selections. It is easy to decide to eat out when you
18 The COMMUNITY Letter www.theletteronline.com MARCH 2011
KISSES by Marie Davis is sponsored by Highland Chiropractic | Dr. Charles Copeland, DC
To request your first appointment with Dr. Copeland, visit www.HighlandChirorpactic.com
Marie Davis is an internationally syndicated cartoonist. Her lesbian cartoon strip is published in five languages. Her first novel, Hey Diddle Diddle — for Lesbians
and Other Grownups, can be purchased through Amazon.com. Her e-mail address is mmmarie1961@aol.com.