April 2011

Clearcreek Elementary School Guiding Students for School Success

A Great Place to Learn

Practical techniques can help Control absenteeism

manage angry moments Absenteeism used
to be considered a
You want your child to respect others and you high school prob-
usually set a good example. But parenting can be lem. Now there’s
frustrating at times, and it’s not always easy to be new focus on early
a good role model. Before using words or a tone grades. Research
you’ll regret, try to: shows that missing
• Think of teachable moments. “I’m so angry too much school is widespread—
I could scream!” This is a perfect chance to even among kindergartners!
teach about managing anger. “I am angry, Studies link it to trouble with
but I’m going to stay calm.” grades, behavior and future learning.
• Imagine consequences. If your anger is out of control, how will it affect Often, family challenges make get-
your child? What if you hold it together and respond well instead? The ting to school difficult. For example,
long-term results will be worth it! your child may have a chronic illness.
• Take a break. There are lots of ways to relax. Count backwards from Or if you work the late shift, you
20. Breathe slowly and deeply. Let another adult help. Call a friend, may be exhausted when it’s time to
privately if necessary. Put off decisions until you’re ready to make them. make breakfast and walk your child
• Use humor. Research shows that laughter has positive effects. It’s almost to the bus stop.
impossible to laugh and feel tense at the same time! And it’s a solution Talk with the school about your
everyone can enjoy. particular challenges. Ask if there
• Be prepared. Before angry moments crop up, think of creative ways to are community resources that can
relax, such as looking at a favorite family picture, exercising or simply help all students do their best.
Source: S. D. Sparks, “Early Grades Become the New
telling yourself, “I am capable of staying calm.” Front in Absenteeism Wars,” Education Week, www.
Source: Denise D. Witmer, The Everything Parent’s Guide to Raising a Successful Child, ISBN: 1-59337-043-1, edweek.org/ew/articles/2010/10/14/08earlyabsenteeism.
Adams Media. h30_ep.html.

Resist the ‘siren song’ Volunteering teaches

Your child isn’t of spring!
being bullied.
compassion
Your child is Spring may be in the What’s so special
the bully! Now what? air, but class is still in about April 10–16?
First, don’t panic. Hearing that session! So continue It’s National Volunteer
is upsetting, but the situation enforcing these regular Week!
can be handled. Here’s how: school-year routines: To observe it with
• Let your child know that • Bedtime. The days are getting your child, you can:
bullying is not okay. Ever! longer, but mornings still come • Clean up litter in a public
• Find out what is influenc- early. So get your child to bed at park.
ing the behavior. a reasonable hour. • Run errands for an elderly
• Insist that your child • Study time. Balmy breezes are neighbor.
apologize to the victim. hard to resist, but stay firm. • Collect donations for a food
Source: R. Black, “When Your Kid’s the
Springtime or not, your child bank or animal shelter.
Bully,” CNN.com, www.cnn.com/2010/ should still finish his homework, Helping others is a concrete way to
LIVING/10/01/p.your.child.bullies/index.
html?hpt=C2. and not replace it with outdoor teach your child compassion and
playtime. selflessness. It just feels good, too.
X02584631 Copyright © 2011, The Parent Institute®, www.parent-institute.com
 ® April 2011

Failure is often a good teacher Divorce can mean

sadness & anxiety
If you set high, yet reasonable, expectations
for your child, he’s more likely to succeed. Divorce is painful for
It’s also important for him to expect a lot of everyone involved, but
himself. especially so for kids.
But what if he fails? Treat failure as an According to research,
opportunity to learn. First, remind your child children whose parents
that everyone fails. Then talk about what can get divorced may:
be learned from it. Sometimes failure teaches • Feel sad or anxious.
the most important lessons! • Experiment with drugs or sex
If your child forgets to study for a test, for earlier than peers.
example, his disappointing grade may lead to • Feel abandoned or rejected.
better preparation in the future. • Act out in the classroom.
If you’re going through a divorce,
Source: Jerry and Lorin Biederman, eds. (excerpt by Maureen Stout, Ph.D.), Parent School, ISBN: 0-87131-958-6,
M. Evans and Company. it’s vital to be aware of how it’s
impacting your child. Talk to the
pediatrician, teacher or school
counselor about how to proceed.
Source: Paul Foxman, Ph.D., The Worried Child:
Recognizing Anxiety in Children and Helping Them
Heal, ISBN: 0-89793-420-2, Hunter House Publishers.

Q:
good way to
I’ve heard that positive reinforcement is a
gh, I’m not
get my child to behave better. Honestly, thou
plicated?
sure what it’s supposed to look like. Is it com
How to instill honesty
A:
llent, effective
You heard right: Positive reinforcement is an exce
And it’s Teach your child to tell the truth,
way to nudge your child toward better behavior.
orcement involves and he may grow into a trustworthy
not complicated at all. Simply put, positive reinf
opria tely and then praising adult. To reinforce the “honesty
“catching” your child when she behaves appr
vior and hopefully matters” message:
her for it. By doing so, you’re reinforcing that beha
• Expect honesty. Let your child
inspiring her to behave properly again the next time.
ng her schoolwork know that “In our family, we
For example, say your child has a habit of leavi
does put her things away, always tell the truth.”
scattered all over the living room. When she
• Explain why lying is wrong.
reinforce that behavior. Here’s how:
“Being dishonest hurts other
• Praise her. Let your child know that you
people and might make them
noticed. “I really appreciate how you
stop trusting you.”
cleaned up after yourself, Maggie!”
• Challenge him. When your child
• Be sincere. Speak with enthusiasm, but
fibs, ask, “Would you like it if I
don’t go overboard. It will sound hollow.
lied to you?”
• Avoid backhanded compliments. Don’t
point out how your child often messes up. Source: Michele Borba, Ed.D., No More Misbehavin’,
ISBN: 0-7879-6617-7, Jossey-Bass.
“You did a great job this time, Maggie.
Too bad you usually leave a mess.” (That’s
Firm, Fair & Consistent®
negative reinforcement.) Guiding Students for School Success
e what your child did
• Offer specifics. The more precisely you defin Publisher: John H. Wherry, Ed.D.
do next time. “I
right, the clearer picture she’ll have of what to Editor: Erika Beasley.
r and then stuck
really like how you put your papers in your folde
Writers: Susan O’Brien, Holly Smith.
Illustrations: Maher & Mignella, Cherry Hill, NJ.
your folder in your backpack.” Copyright © 2011, The Parent Institute®, a division of NIS, Inc.
nting/ P.O. Box 7474, Fairfax Station, VA 22039-7474
” HealthyPlace.com, www.healthyplace.com/pare
Source: “Reinforcing Positive Behavior at Home,
parenting-skills/reinforcing-positive-behavior-at-h
ome/menu-id-61. 1-800-756-5525
1545-7737
www.parent-institute.com • ISSN 1541-437X

Copyright © 2011, The Parent Institute®, www.parent-institute.com