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TheOmandaecycle

VOLTERGEIST

Chapter1

Thesmallbluemetalboxthatcaughttheeclipseof
thesunwashot.Thechiefsurgeonburieditina
boxofblacksandthatstoodonatable;likea
funerealarrangement.Thefumesofthesandwere
stifledbythegasmaskofthedokteer.Hishands,
madeintoprecisemachines,openeduptheblue
boxinitsgraveandextractedthemalformed
contentswithautomatapincertips.Silverinthe
gleaming,thelong,thinlikemetalhandscarried
thedeadbeetlesfromtheboxonebyone.The
doctorlinedupthebeetlesupturnedaroundthe
decayingvinyl-record.Thefungusonthegrooves
ofdeadmusicpartedawayfromthedeadbugs.An
assistanttothedoctorarrived,falsesunsbleaming
inthreesfromtheoverheadwatch-light.
Shewasnakedandpaintedinwhiteliquidskin.
Herorificessealedandfaceless.Shespokewith
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hermind,nippleserect.thestationneedstotilt.
Lockdownyourlabandbeltup.
Thedoctormadehisownheadspinandthelab
lockeddown.Heinsertedhislowertorsointoa
shaftonthefloor.Theshaftfilledupwithconcrete.
Tubesdescendedfromthefalseceilingwindows
andsnakeditsway,organiceel,intohismouthand
nostrilsandears.Theassistantleftafter
overseeingthelockdown.The
VOLTERGEISTATIONthentiltedtrajectories.

Chapter2

Fromthesoundofblacknesscamethemarching
band.Youthfulteensinspacesuitsandband
leaderhats.Redandgoldandwhitedecorata.
Theyofferedmusiqandwakingtothesleeping
chiefs.Theplastic-liquid-concreteintheshaftsde-
filled,thetubesdislodgedfromthroats.
Consciousnessreturned.Theassistantreturns.
5

thankyouforthelockdowndoctor.Please
commencerehabilitationprogramme.

Thedoctoremergedfromthecocoonlikeshaft
andtouchedthesleepingmachinesintheroom.
Wallsofslitheringsilicon,aheartbeatbehindclear
plasticskin.Theycamealivewithhistouch.Hair
likeveinsofwiresthrobbedinsoftlyglowd.The
labadjusteditself,breathingeasy,walls,
reverberatingwiththeupdates.
Labsycrosancthasbeenrehabilitized.
Thenakedprofessormovestothetableofsand
andgravesandboxesandbugs.Someofthemhave
returnedtolife.
Heturnstothewhitemannequinassistant;
tellmouthofmothersomedataremains.
yes,master.Shebowsandexits.
TheDoctorstudiesthefirstfourbeetlesthatbegan
twitchingthornedlegs.Behindhim,doorsslid
openandothercavesappeared.Astronauttribes
camepilingin,carryingbodybagsandotherforms
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ofboxesandspheres.Thecagescameinonwheels.
Withinit,tornpages,hardcoverswithnothing
betweenthem,,despoiledtechnologiesofoldwrit,
blackboxesofinformation,touchscreendevices.
Thedoctorunderstoodtheintentionofmouthof
mother.Hewatchedasthespacemen&womenset
uptheaquariansystems.Hewatchedasthe
genesisprogramsandintelligencecodaare
uploaded,theeyesonthewallopeningand
breathingupinlight.Theapocalipsisprogramis
running.Labsycrosanctbeginschannellinganew
voice.

Chapter3

temperature,drops.Theroomtremors.Acolder
airresides.Thespacesuitswithnooneinsideare
bustling.Moreapparatusesareconnectedtothe
breathingwalls.(wormliketubesasbigasboas,
writhinginghosthands)Thecagesarehungupon
metalchainsthickasarms(thereisasoundof
books,screaming).Morepaleskinissurgically
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wrappeduponthewalls(tomasksomesounds,to
keepcertainorganswarm).Behindit,snakethe
organicveinsthatwillcarrybloodandwaterto
thelungsofthelab.Thefacelessmodelarchetype
assistantenterspushinganadvancedexo-skeleton
basedwheel-chair(sleek,metallic,dexterous)
withwhatappearsasaboxstandinguprightunder
blackceremonialcloth.Smokeisemanatingfrom
it,asweetscentofburningwood,seedandfresh
blackflowers.Theassistantbegantalkinginan
eldervoice,thatofaman.Theblackboxonthe
wheelchairhadpossessedtheandroidnurseand
wasnowspeakingthroughher.
IAM/STATUS_UNKNOWN/IHAVECOMETOFIND
SARROGHEITUS.

CHAPTERFOUR
Thebox,speakingdirectlytothemachines
throughwhitemannequinandroid,toldlab
sycrosancttodoanothertilt.Thenresurrect
severaldeceased/diseasedprograms.

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Idiola
Omandae
Odar
Vaultm
1000.100
Labsycrosanctrefusestoacknowledgethelast
program.
theheartwillnotsurvivethelastchaosengine.It
explained.
ourtechnologiesarenotyetaptforsuchanapp.
/STATUS_UNKNOWN/contacts/TERMINALCODA/
THEMACHINEWILLNOTCOMPLYTO1000.100.
TELLMEWHOWILL?THEREARENOCODESTO
BYPASSTHISPROGRAM.
Already,thetwoeditorsarespeakinginstars.For
fearforthegalaxies,theybypassthecodafor
1000.100

WOMBONE
InductedFebruary13,2008

PRINCIPALPLATFORM:thefirstorderofthings.mother-father
satelliteplanet.

ChiefOperatingsystem:NATIVITY
Editorinchief:TERMINALCODA

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THEboxeatsthefirstbeetle.

Materialcase3:42
[[[EDITING /STATUS_UNKNOWN/
FACILITY: VOLTERGEISTATION C/O ALTERVOLTER PRESSS]]]
DEATH RATE: CLIMBING.










11



BREAKSEALTOACCESSCONTENTS

ASSIGNEDBYTHE
APPROVEDACTIONOF:
/WOMBONE/

Caseredesigned :ws-
section345-11:21-O2-Y2K8
EXTTRATEMPORALDE-
FIGURING.MALHOMEON
PROGRAMCOMMENCED
11/2/8

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Youleavethesethingsinthehandsof
monsters,dontexpectlittlekittensin
return.

Bythesolidificationofthisworkahead,allinherent
mistakes,defiler,blasphemyistobekepttothe
heart,unbroken,un-appealed,readyandwaiting
likeaslave.
-fromapost-work

13

Movement1

14

Redquiem
Aprelude

15

Writtenby
PereiraIrvingPaul
SaulLieraDuFontaine
ImmanuelBalthazar
Frictional
AnonRa

EDITEDBY:/STATUS_UNKNOWN/

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Thepowersofallthefirstthings
Theorderedsource,unconscioustruth
Thewordthatbeganall
Thebreaththatendedit
Nature,God,cruciallove
AndWhatSaulfeltwasenough
Hewasbroughttotearsthatnightinthealiendesert.
Oflandscapesblueandhorizonsforever;
Broughttohiskneeswiththemindagape.
Andfromintelligencesofelsewhere
TheSymbolschargedandsupernaturalandcosma,
brandeditselfonhisholographicmemory,
mappedintosequenceandpatternsandcolors
Deeplyimpresseduponhisneuralmap,
InCombinata,theopenerof
Gatesdistantintime
Andalternateinspace

Wisdomofoldanduntold
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Uncreatedandpost-human
Formedlikelavabloodinhiseternalmind.
Theinnereyeopeningaglimpseintocompleteconsciousness.
Themomentofallyetnotenough.
Neverenoughastheeyecloses

andallthatisseenisgone.

Yes:Manissadandugly;sadunderthevastsky;hepossessesclothesbecauseheisnolongerchaste,
becausehehasdefiledhisproud,godlikeheadandbecausehehasbent,likeanidolinthefurnace,his
Olympianformtowardbaseslaveness!ArthurRimbaud.

hetooktoomuchdruqs.unnamed.

allthecraziesfallinlovewiththecrazies.

godhelpuseh,wewillemergethroughthedoortransformedandIambelievingthatthosearoundus
willbehurtfortheywillnotrecognizeus.

Takemedowntothecitiesofthefuture.Infectedmushroom.
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allthisleadssomewhere.anon

Invocationofthefirstmind.

In
The
Nameof
Themetaphor,
Ofschizophrenia
andcompleteobfuscation
Ibegin.

INvocationofthesecondminde
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IT
IS
NotIwhospeaks.
Forintheredbookoffutuere
iwritofintelligencesbeyondmymind
andaslovecrafthadseen
andAOSdrew
andasSaintJohnrevealed
Itoohadheard
andspakeitsmind,
withinandwithout.
solisten!
itisnotIwhospeaks.

Invocationbythethirdhallucinatedmind

Mysterieet
Duunlearn
Mysterieet
Duconceive
Mysterieet
Duforseen.

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thelittlegirlasks.dowebeginnowdaddy?

Hesays,webegin.

Book1

THE RED MAN: Part equinox



The following is a work a dream. The dream is a work of reality, though hidden. Hidden from the
sight and understanding by the girl who walks past you. The man who is coughing at the bus stop.
His dream is a work of his thoughts.

His thoughts are not your thoughts.
Your thoughts are not his.
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It is two separate dreaming.
But one and the same space.

I have met you in my dreams; as I meet you in life.
It is life that separates us. Not our dreaming.

The following is a work of dream.
She is standing in the sea, waves lapping against her knees. Her arms are outstretched to the
heavens. I know her. She has been in my life many years and in many of my lives.
I ask her, in voice only present in the skies, what will you miss the most about this place when you
leave. She looks around her, to see which sight she would miss, which story or which unfolding.
She looks at my tower and she begins to break down crying.

The sea is stirring with her sadness.

Her sadness brings her to my home. My sanctum and sanctuary.
She is lying down on her front and I am lying down infront of her.
I reach out to touch her face. I feel her tears, distinct , wet and cold on my fingers. Then I am
unsure

are these her tears or mine?

She tells me about the way I spoke to her and of the words I spake.

I love you. She mimics my voice, that was how you said it. A low whisper, filled with a
frightening and a power. A trembling at such sacred sentences.
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I love you

I love her

and what did you say/ ia sked her

she stroked my hair and said nothing.

Nothing at all.

Exit the tower. I am now below, at the roads. I walk away from the tower, through the
neighbourhood where the apartment blocks rose to the skies. Beneath the block, at its entrances
hung plastic sheets. A mans voice answered me when I asked nothing

They are for the suicides, so that the blood would not splash into the place below the block.

I passed a funeral with no coffin. Only wreaths and flowers in the breeze. Death was about me.
There was no body.

I crossed into the carpark, with its equidistant trees. And a tall dark skinned boy followed me. He
turned to look at me and his face was a starved devil. A great evil was his aura, his eyes turning a
purgatorial red. A black hound was barking ferociously beside him. More black dogs appeared
with the ghastly red in their flaming eyes. Their growls and barks spoke of a foreboding terror. Its
devil master pointed to me.

I know who you are and what you are doing.

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The hellish beasts were released upon me.

I ran.

Partequinoxe.

Dreamistheworkofthoughtinreality.
Realityisadreamofworkinthought.
Thoughtisarealityintheworkofdream.

Runlikehell.

Thehoundsareonyourheels.

Breath,ahotaridairsearsyourskin.Theirbarksliketheterriblecallsignsofhelldogs.Theyareafter
theshaman,breakingthroughhishiddenpath,gunningforthefleshofhissoul.Runlikehell.The
houndsareontheheelsoftheshaman.

Mooncurvatureoffatangentorbit.Itisinnopositionforprotection.Theshamanlookselsewhere,
running,leapingthroughthewormholes.

Theredhoundsfollowthrough.Thewildpackinperversepursuit.

Theshamanrunsintotheredalley;theredbrickshavethinfairarmsreachingout.Behindthosewalls
aregirlssuffocatingbehindsandandconcrete.Theirarmsreachouttograbhim,toholdhim,calling
himtosetthemfree.
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Hecanhearmuffledscreamsbehindthewalls.

Hekeepsrunning.
Helllikerun.

Theshamanisrunningthroughthestreetsbutheisasleep.Firsthintsofmorninglightrising.Cars
screechtomisshim.StrideslongandrhythmicBarefooted,cakedwithbloodassolesimpactgravelrode.
Ahardstormingrun.Possessed.Mindonfire.

Runninglikehell.

Inthedreamthegirlisfargone.HedoesnothearhersayIloveyouthewayhehadsaidittoher.

TheEternalshe,nownothingandfaraway.

Blindlyherunsintostreets.Halfpantingandscreamingbehindeyesrolleduptohishead.Hehears
peoplelaughingathim.Therunningscaredshamanhavingbrokefreefromhishomeinaboxbeneatha
blockwithnofunerals.

Herunsblindlyintothepark.

Thewildthingsarecloserbehindhim.Thepackisgrowing,ascendingfromthelowerrealms,theother
realms,drivenbyomnipotentREDandiidiola.

Beforehimawallofleaves,aborderseparatingoneparkfromthenext.Heisrunningfaster.
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Thedogsareturningtofire.

Hecanfeelthemsearinghisentiresoul.Anunholyheatburninginfrombehind.
Heleapsintothewall.

Thepackleapswithhim.

Hellhathcome.

EQUINOX.OrtheREDEXPLOSION

REDHORSES

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Thereareredeyesinthedarkness,manyofthem,andwhitesteam,exhalationfromflarednostrils.

Thegungoesoff.

Shotintotheairlikeastarter.Thefireandsmokeexplodes.

Bang.

Thewroughtirongatesburstopen,grillsonfire,hell-likeandredwithheat.Inthedarknessthereare
redeyes,manyofthem,andwhiteangrysmoke,fromflamingnostrils.

Thegungoesoff.Theredhorsesburstforth,afamilyofstallions,muscularandnetherworldly,theRED
HORSEShavebrokenfree.

TheA&Edoorsburstopen,paramedicsrushinwiththeIndianboyonthewheeledstretcher.Thenurses
areshouting,callingoutBPS,recitingdrugadministrations.

Bang

Thegungoesoff.Theboyflinchesbutisntbreathing.Bloodpatchgrowingwiderundergauzeand
pressure;theblood,REDdoesnotstop.Rush

Thefivehorsesrush,violenthoovesbangoutagainsttheblackgravel,arageofhorseslikeanangry
train,loudandintense,streakingtoitsdestination.

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Themedicalteamturnsthecornerleft,straightdownthewhitehallintosurgery,barkingcommandsat
eachother,B.PI.V,Pressuresdropping/stopthebleeding/getdoctorLee/abarrageofvoiceslikethe
rumblingofmanystallions

Redhorsesrunning,grunting,flamesleapingforthfromitsnostrils,eyesredinaragingglare.Thered
horsesrun

Thewhitelightsshootoverhead,theboyisnowamanisnowaboy,hecannottellbutstaresblankat
thepassinglightsabove,thevoicesdrownedout,heseestheblurofsurgicalmasksbehindthefaces,
redcrossesonwhiteuniforms.Theyrushintoemergencysurgery

Heseeshisdeadfathersfacelookingdownathim,followinghimathisside,runningwiththedoctors.

Everythingissoquietdad

Thehorsesgalloplikeastormvisitedupontheland,runningwildtowardstheedgeofthecliff.

Throughtheemergencysurgerydoorstheyenter,heiscarriedontotheoperatingtable;bloodshooting
fromhismultiplewounds,arainofblood

Theredhorses,sidebyside,leapoffthecliff.Anendlessjump.

everythingssofree

Theteammovequicklyaroundhim,cuttingofftheshirt,moppinguptheblood,applyingpressure,
shootingdrugsintotubesintohisarms

soeffortless.
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Tubesrunintohisthroat,hiseyesstillwideandstaringatthewhitelightsabove.Andthelightsabove
staredownathim

Sobeautiful.

Theredhorsescrashthroughthehospitalwallsandintotheroomwheretheboylay.Aloudandterrible
invasionamidstthescreamingofnursesandthethicksoundsofconfusion.

justliketheypromisedme

Thehorsessurroundthebed,thestaffbackingawayfromthehugeredbeasts,aggressiveand
protectiveovertheboy

Noonewillharmmeagain

Apoliceofficerrushesinwithhisgundrawntothemomentwheretheleadhorserisesuponitsfiery
hindlegs.Thegundrops.

Noonewillbelittleme.

Theofficerisatalost,holdinginhisbreathatsuchasurrealsightintheemergencyroom.

ThenIshallbepowerful

Theofficersignalseveryonetostepbackevenfurther.Thenursesarefrozentotheirspots,jawopen,
eyeswide.
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andfeared.

Throughthegapingholeinthebrokenwall,athickblacksmokepoursforthandthroughitafigure
emerges,adriftlikeasevenfootghost,atowering,longhairedwarlockwitheyesthatburnred.

Tonighttheywillcomeforme

Thehorsesreacttothepresence,makingwayforittodriftdowntothesideoftheboy.Thehorseswith
eyesaflame,gruntandstomptheirheavyhoovesintothewhitefloors,crackingthegrounds

Totakemehome

Thekinglyfigureinhislongflowingcloakofblackandroyalred,lookdownattheboy;andtheman
staresbackathim,facetwistedinhislastdyingmomentsyetalive

OhMLord!myGod

Thefigurereachesoutwithhisglovedhandandgentlywipesawaythetearsandbloodstainsfromthe
drugdealersface

Takemeaway

Thewarlockleansforwardandplantsasoftkissonthedealersforehead.

fromallofthis.
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Theentirehospitalexplodeswithagreatredflashofpsychicenergy;releasedfromwithinthebuilding,
rushingoutacrossthecitynight.

Book
2consumpt
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ionofthe
second
beetle

AXISMUNDI
or
Thestanceofdeath
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Outheraether

Outsidespace

Outsidetime

Theconvenehadbegun.
Morestarsinthisnight,visible.
Moreconfusionuponthegroundsoftheobservatory.
Tonightthetideofmindspaceisturning.
Thebeingswatchon.

Theybegintospeak,onebyone.

Amongthemisaman.
HistongueisAramaic.Thereisbloodonhishandsandfeet.
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havethouremember,thestoryofDamascus,andwitnesshere,Saul,whomIhavecalledtothisnight.
Listen,allyewhocanhear,forItisTheLordwhospeaks.

Amongthemisastar.

BeholdtheforgottenplanetAi-Fi
itthisspacethatspeaks.
Ofatmosphericmysterium,whiteoceansonsnow-eternalshores.
Asournaturesfuturescycleoutthroughthischylde
Weclaimhimasourprimateley-line.

Amongthemisaraceofbeings.

Anorangeglowmarkstheirpresence
Theyaretheintelligencesofindigolights.

NBLR
Itishercouncilwhospeaks
Ofthefuturelord,ImannuelBalthazarLore
Inhisimmediatefuture,lookingathimfromthemirrorsofhisimmediatepresent
Theonewhowascreated,touncreate.
Theonewhoiscalledthefirstscribeofnebulore.
Theoneghost,whomwetakeasourmediatr
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Wecometoyou
NBLR

Amongthemwasafutureentity
Itdidnotspeak.

Thenamongthemcameaserpent;
Fieryred,sometimesadragon
Butneithermythicbeastorthefallendevil
Thisserpentcomesfromatimebefore,
ofprimaandcosmos
archetypeandmagicka
andinitsslithers,itsays
sssssuccumbtome
immaculateshe
femininemystery
bathedinblack
hiddenbeneath
mycloakofnight
ssssuccumbtome
immaculateshe

and
Amongthemcamemanymorevoices,toomanytodiscern;eachclaimingthishumanastheir
vehicle/prophet/conduit/poet/shamanandotherunnamableformsandfunctions.
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Nebecameasigntosomeintelligences,agemstonetoothers.

Thengreatchaospursued.
11:11pm,11:11:2005

Theyeachspaketheirlinesofactivata
thesentencethattransforms
oftenreverberatingasdeath
endingthenbeginning
thebeingthatisreborne.
Theyeachspaketheirtruth
Andinallofthehistory,ofthewordthatwasbeginning
Ofthewordthatwastoend
Therewasonlyonevoicethatgotthrough
Buttonight
IndireNovember
Itisnotlikeanyothernight.

Thevoicesallcameatonce.Andsaulheardallofthemthoughhewasnotsupposedto.Buthismind
havebeenfracturedbeyondalloriginalconfigurations.Allthedoorswereopenandheheardallofthem.
Therewasonlysupposedtobeone.Butheheard;thesongofNBLR,thelordsinvitation,thespunofthe
blackspyderweb,thecalloftheaboriginies,andcountlessofothervoices.Thenthroughthosevoiceshe
fileteredoutone.Thevoiceoftheunknowable.Theonethatcameamongallothervoices.Foritwas
wirtten

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Amongthemthencameavoice.
Omnisprentandmultilingual
Reverberatingatthousandsoffrequencies,
Eachdissimilarindepthandfield.
Thevoiceeverlasting
Thefirstcommanding
Speakingtoallthathearsandunderstands.

IINTHEGREATJOURNEYOFTHEMULTIVERSE
THERECOMES,ONCEINASEQUENTIA,ADIFFERENTIAL
ANANOMALYINTHEFLOWOFALLTHINGS
JUSTASTHEREAREANOMALIESINALLMANNEROFSYSTEMS
TERRESTRIALOROTHERWISE.
ASSUCHANOMALIESEXIST
SODOESITSCONTERPART,NORMALCY
FORITTAKESONESTATEFORTHEOTHERTOINCUR

Throughallofyou,Iwork
Throughallofyou,Ispeak
Andallofyouthroughhim
Willspeaktothepeople.
Forsoon,theyshallbetransformed
Andbeknownaspeoplenomore.
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Andtheywilljoinus
Andoneofthemwillsitatourcouncil
Andtheonerepresentingthemwouldbethisman.
Suchisthewayitwillbe
Listen,andyouwillalreadyunderstand
Foritistheunknowablethatspeaks.

AndIhavechosenSaulLieraDufontaine
Ashehaschosenme.

THECHESROOM

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Theredknights

Lineageofpurgatoryred,theredknightscomethroughthegatesofretributionandkarma,thesteeds
ofoffensiveanddefence,spiritualsteedsfromafieryJerusalemalongsidetheChristofWar,redand
goldenarmourdwithscepterdrule;broadandlargetheGodlywarlockmanofbiblealternata

Theblackknights
Outofnightcomestheunseenjauntsofhorsesblack..spaceresembala,thestarryeyedsteedsof
mysteriumandabysmal;wherefromandhenceto,comethandgoeththesourceofalllifeandlight.
Ineternalblack,thestallionscome,heavyfootedwiththeirparadoxking..

Theblackking
Namelessvoid,opensunyata,unendingsoulofthedoorsofholesblack,inspaceepic,vast;thisroyal
beingheavesandamultiversebirthsorends.Unlightedpossibilities;thefinalsecretinthesoundofits
breath.Wishnottoheartheblackkingsname.

Theredking
Hereinthisstoryarc;knownasREDIDOL.Theferventdestroyer,themagnetaoflifeforcetaken
away;replacedbytheunquenchablefire.

Theredqueen
Mothermostchaste,prostitutemostpure;streetwalkeroftheredstreetsofthecity.Forinhereyeshe
seesthefamiliescomingthrough,missingfather,missingchylde,missingmother,missingtime.Fruit
ofherwomb,thiscomingday,indireNovember,thechildwillpay.

39

Theblackqueen
Spiderwoman,blacksandsoffuturetime;ringswithinrings,pointsofchange;theblackspiderwidow
entersthecodesontoscreensblackandLCD;sittinguponhercenteredthrone,crossleggedunfaced.
Ancientweaverofnightandfate.

GREY
Angel,of.
Thecomingwave,wingdwiththeweightoftheuniverse,feetuntouchingthedismalground;headin
lifeofpresenttime;decided,herreturntothisswirlingchange;remembering,thisearthandthose
passedbeforeher;neitherblacknorforeverwhite;angelofthegreyscalesight.

TheREDcastles
Toweriumriseuponthepregnantland;meridiansrunthebloodflowoftheriverdescendingclose
fromthenorthernlights,thebloodiedsongofancestralfight;thetowersriseinfuturestate;oer
lookingitsblasphemousslate.

TheBlackbishops
Commonblack,theunicorndthing,pyramidalboneprotrudedinplaceofthefourtheye.Boneof
resonanceandcrossmultiversecommunication;theboneofthedeepspaceascetics;starvingbishops
oftheblack.Chosenleader,currentprophet,echoedvoiceofprimalfuture.

TheREDbishops
Disparatezonesofthegreatmachine,ravagingchiefsofreddisorder;thepresentdistractionbehind
thesongsthatnarrateourmarchtoourdeaths.Cry!,Ohumanity!,Weepforyourblindness,the
bishopsREDhaveledusbyhandtooasisloudandthirstun-quenching.

Thepawns.
40

Onallsides.Howuponourlandsthestage,weexpoundontherolesourwantsturnedprimatebythe
flickerandthesoundthatstopsnotforourthoughtsandofourthoughtsthatstopinitsunmistakable
song.

1)Check

2)Check

3)Checkmate

Night of the Author



There are four books in use. Four of different sizes and thickness. Two black books. The FIRST black book belongs to a
much younger philosopher, writing out the preoccupations of his bright and nimble mind. From it, we see his obsessions
with the spiritual realms, communication, theories about reality, Christ and his accompanying Church. This is an early book
of thoughts., the pages are shaped after a life of early influences. The author is believed to be in teen hood at the time of
the writings; and also believed to be some kind of intellectual.

The second black book details a complex landscape of psycho erotic literature including journal entries. Early investigations
suggests it was written by a woman, although all written evidence suggests otherwise. Classified as The Offensive Volume,
its contents are not allowed to be discussed here.

The large format, lime-green book begins with a dedication.

For stargazer

Early reports suggests the name belonging to an A.I program, now completely erased. Following the dedication were the
words, I AM Immanuel Balthazar, The First Scribe of the House of Balthazar. The book then details some kind of
41

incantation, written in an unrecognizable language. It ran for almost two pages, and ended, as it began with the letters
NBLR.

Following the incantation, its pages were empty until almost the middle where then came the beginnings of a story.


Tale of the final father

On the night my father was consume'd by the fire in the mountain, he told me a story.
I was only seven but he told me to listen to it carefully and said i would remember it at the hour of my need.
He thus began
"there was once a young ignorant boy, who felt no qualms about doing anything he wanted
until the day the fire in the mountain came down to speak with him.
It told him about the wrong things he had done, all through a random reading of the book of prophets.
It was one line that transform'd him, and although that line is forgotten, his legacy shall never be.
Upon the rise of the first morning sun, the boy became an adult, and vowed to change his ways.
He went up to the temple in the mountains, and spoke with the wise fire-eating ascetics about becoming a priest.
They gave him his blessings and thus the boy became an adult, and a priest for the fire in the mountains.

For the first year, he went about the villages, preaching and healing the sick.
He took on his skill as a good listener to greater heights, by being a new age counsel in the city of night and lights.
He followed the words and books of the fire in the mountain fervently, often quoting from it at length to make his point to
the people,
and although he did not preach to large crowds, and only in small groups, hundreds upon hundreds of villagers heard him,
though only a handful understood him.
He carried on his teachings for well over a year until the night he experienced his first brush with forces ill and dark, on the
night he had those terrible visions, hallucinogen lights RED scorched all blindness with anger and he thus saw the RED MAN;
the preternatural force that is feared and worshipped, standing before him

The story ends there and the pages following it till the end was blank.

42

The last book. The skin colored blank pages, 500 pages thick; a rectangular book it was and in it were half stories, scattered
epics written in summary across dense and complex structures. Mind maps and charts, map sketches and key scenes were
all mapped out in black ink, pages after pages but never completed. Many key character names were tabled with life
histories following it but belonging to no particular narrative. The big pictures were there, but the meat and bones were
missing

And Blood

Red and slightly blackish splashing across skin colored pages

TheapocalypseofSaul.

I
AM
KingofBlack.
Thecommongodofallthatattracts.
Worshippedastheelemntairintheorients,
Govningovertheforceofspace
Botheofelementandofmetaphore
Inmyheartarethestars
Inmyenvirons,youseethecolors
Iampsychedeliclore
Andtheinnertrip.
Iamkingofblack.
and
Mynamewillmakeyouinfinite.
43

I
AM
Lightandcolor
Iappeartoyouasnothing
Insilence,Iamunderstoodassunyata
Iamthemysteryoffoundation
Thefoundationofmystery
Everythingcomesfromme
Everythingreturnstome
Iamyourforeverhome
IamBlack
TheGodofallspace.

Iammysteriumeodinaire
Themother/fathership
Enjoinedshifterofstates
Littleisknownaboutme.

I
Am
Blackmatter
Theunknownspacethatunitestheuniverse
Inmybosomarethestars
Iwatchallplanetsevolve.
44

Nonebulaeescapesmyknowledge
Nosupernovaeisgoneunwitnessed
Iamspace
Thesunismylefteye
Themoonismyright
AndthoughIamwatchful
Overbothyournightsanddays
Iamforeverblack.
Foreverextending
Foreverrecurring.

Iamspace
INT/EXT
Lookupatme
Andyoushallseeme
Lookintome
andyoushallfeelme,

Iamaboveyou
Andwithinyou
Everpresent.

IAm
Theangeloftheblack

45

Book3
Frictional

Frictional2003

A postmodern gathering.
46

Activity. Activate. Accentuate

I say what a day, raincoats with holes and the rain like acid, drop by drop
burning through my skin. It reached my bones by the time i reached the
shelter and the people in front of the posh pink hotel gasped and screamed as
my flesh slid off my frame to bubble in a red-black mess on the floor.
What carpeting destroyed!
The guards came running out with their little guns when they heard the
screaming because they figured "a terrorist attack!"
They all apparently froze upon seeing me, half in flesh half in bones turning
to white bubbling calcium.
and they kept firing those puny guns! I say man, it was deafening, i told
them to turn it down but they couldn't hear me. a bullet took off half my
left face and i was terribly upset by the loss of my cheekbones so I started
screaming instead.
I wonder why the hotel collapsed.
I didn't yell that loud. *shrugs

"After they start barking, then how?"
ignore them.
you know that bloke who kept mumbling about acid rain and guns blowing off
the side of his face?
he has more than one face. I know because i killed him. i ate him. i gave
birth to him. i made him pregnant with my monstrosities. i create and destroy
him anytime i want.
and now he deserves to be a pool of wet flesh. So that is what he is.
object me. and i will choke you with dark soot.
I am the bringer of mortal/frictional death. Angel of the literary nightmare.
The headless that stands behind your door as you come home alone.....

Then it moved.
47

i could hear the ground sizzle with its spit. i could feel its tortured
psyche move in the air like electricity. Then it spoke:
"You call this a meta-deal key book? where is the blood that i wanted? where
are their cold dead hearts? DO you want to keep me hungry forever? Do you
want me to stop giving you life?"
I had no other choice but to tell him
"Yes. It is death i want."
"you're fucking insane old man. Death is a terrible place to be."
"YOU are a terrible thing to deal with, so i'll take my chances. I think
death can deal me a better deck of cards." i said. I lit a cigarette.
"You have balls Book man. and what do you think you will gain from trying to
run from me?"
"I will gain a new state" i told him "then i'm coming back to kill you."

" I don't kill couples for fun." said the thing.


i could smell it breathing in the corner of this dark and haunted alley in
New Bronx.
"EVERYONE vents their bloody anger in there." The deadclown said, pointing to
the LCD monitor.
... so the stylized, oh you "sleepy driftwood covered in mud (but the mud
sinks) deeper deeper to where the other bodies are (you sick bastard!) i've
heard her scream enough. Now you are no more tongue."
car horns explode. The sweltering heat. waves and waves of broiling heat
rising from the hood of cars, into the metallic trees, the aluminium leaves
turning hotter hotter till it falls off and scalds the faces of the make-up
beauties. Unaware, their skin starts cooking, the smell of flesh stirring up
my high-hunger.
The backstreets are always there, always poorly lit. with white smoke gushing
out of open manholes, the flickering orange light from mutilated streetlamps,
there to give the place the look of a rundown warehouse. rubble on the sides,
old bloodstains on the walls, the broken windows, spirits that refuse to
acknowledge the death of their brutalized bodies.
The terror of past still haunts these backstreets.
48

And it is in this place that i was reborn. when i became a meta-dealer.
The House of Ihiir
the mopium noom ascetics hijacks the story-arc
Enter the 'errorists' CTRL_ALT+DEL bounty hunters set to dis-construct the
meta-dealers. what terrible fancy they have. barefoot, skin, bones with a
mind empowered by surrealisme. Star attractors in the world of Cirqu
reading, watching, playing, HUNTING.
"fearsome, fear them, come they be, the bringer of doom from the dimension of
Mopium. Terrible monstroCITIES from the mind of noom-the=ascetic-king-of-the-
warcraftian entities.
behold the ghosts of anti-thesis.
The streets in daylight. Less terror-filled. a sort of calm.
a tall thin shadow moves by my side. I turn and it is gone. I think of them,,
"the Ascetics" I think they are making themselves known to me. Telling me
somehow, through my thoughts that "we are still here"
Awake. Insomnia. I am thinking of how alien they are. They occupy so much of
my thoughts at times.
Those tall, skin and bones men. Grey skinned. Luminous light glowing from
their empty eye sockets. why did they choose to come to this plane?
"We are Tribe" i hear.
Ah, a Tribe. It makes a bit more sense now. Always i have been close to the
tribes of all times-spaces-continuums.
and they know i know.
"You know, we know." They say. Then they leave me be
the soul lights a cigarette spark, a quick burst of light through the mist
rising from the steel drainage gate in the ground
puddles of oil and water floatilla, a distant star shining in the ground
where even demons had feared to tread but but
what could be more terrible than the entities that frighten themselves? I
tell you, its those glowing eyes, the nightmare jingle of cold steel against
49

bone, the bones of voodoo kings hanging like a masterpiece from the necks of
skeleton ascetics
hear them moving through the moist walls behind buildings
the houseless ones shift from their sleep in cardboard boxes
they hear the clanking of bones on bones
they see shadows move from the corner of their eyes. They feel a promise
being fulfilled, they smile in their stupor'd sleep and good good inside they
feel for justice, no matter how scant, comes.
the houseless kind feel rested in these backstreets for the ghosts of anti-
thesis watches them like lightning before a storm in the sky.
all is dark
This meta-space moves. This city, always alive. The atmosphere always
changing frequencies, energies, radiowaves, and sonar, among so many other
things that we have not yet perceived.
- The Coma
Girl

it has been 35 days since the meta-dealer was abandoned into the meta-city,
with the life of the coma girl in his hands, and all other portals closed. It
never rained over those days but the skies and winds were always chilling, in
way of terror rather than atmospheric.
now,
Meta-city
For a long while , it lay silent as the grave but it now stirs quietly.
Moving slowly like a dawn into smoky skies, the darkness slowly receded and
that rare rare light had begun to burn through the thickness and the
confusion.
50

for years, the denizens of the meta-city had lived beneath a canopy of fear
and twilight carnage but the prophesies of those who sleep upon the cold,
desolate streets is beginning to realize itself.
The hunger that once swept the dead city blocks began to shrink away before
the dim but growing light.
"The coma girl is awakening" some of the children would cry out, weakly but
confidently. And the elders watched their children through shimmering
tears for they shall soon taste the bliss of Hope
Hope that there would soon be a home, a true, peaceful home for everyone.
and
Hope that the veil of darkness and disturbance would soon be lifted.
In the skies, the frequencies began its shifting as parallel universes
underwent their respective recalibrations. IN the distant galaxies, entities,
once disregarded by men but now constantly called upon, had decided the next
course of action for the meta-city.

At the council of Ihiir, The Great Elder of Balthazar said, " our need for
intervention has come, for far too long has this meta-city endured the
terrors and nightmares of the meta-dealers. The ghosts of anti-thesis shall
receive our viral gifts and with those gifts, shall 'the ascetics' be
empowered to engage and remove the thorn that haunts the heart of this city.
all but one meta-dealer shall perish in this night of reckoning and by the
sacred staff of Istarist, I, Immanuel Balthazar, call upon the entities of
protection to descend onto the meta dealer called Saul, to protect him from
the onslaughtering."

and with that invocation, the Lords of the House of Balthazar and Lore
initiated the Viral Gifts, thus beginning the War that would be called
"The Night of The Ascetic Armagedda"


so far from the original intention, this postmodern gathering had evolved
from a playground of hoaxes into a story arc of Epicus. For those who had
vaguely followed The Frictional through its metamorphoses, understand that
its storyverse was never rooted in linearity or sense as you and i understand
51

the term. Its creator is ill, dis-eased by his ownmind that had sabotaged his
own spirit time and again.

Things are changing. A War has begun. One Meta-dealer shall escape THe NIght
OF Ascetic Armagedda but with a price that is beyond comprehension.

soon, the Coma-Girl shall awaken and the full story shall be told.

Be patient.

for the sake of all denizens of The Meta-city.

Be patient.
I know you will read this
listen to me, please.
my beloved. your understanding is the only thing that would save me.
although you sleep your endless sleep and may not see inside my turmoil and
my urgency to see you alive and before me, awake and with that light in your
eyes; i pray that you would know how i feel as i stay here beside your
sleeping form watching you sleep, watching your chest gently rise and fall in
your peacefulness
every breath of yours is a moment extended for me, taking me further away
from my own sanity foryour absence in spirit leaves me dry, leaves me
starving for life.
i want to touch your face as it is flushed with heat
i want to hold your heart as it beats alive in me
I need you.
52

our world is ending my love, soon the ascetics will win for us the paradise
we have so longed for but soon is still so far away as you are so far away
and paradise is meaningless for me if i cannot be with you there.

don't leave me like this my love, please. Awake.
the demons that i have dealt with will still not let me be, they will still
haunt me and hunt me leaving me on the edge of death but never allowing me
to die for they enjoy my pain,. The only way that i can survive them is to
burn with a passion for you.
your presence keeps me here, keeps meintact. awake soon my love
i can hold on but not forever
I love you.
Ivewaitedsolongforyoutocomeback,mycoma-girl,youwithnoname;but
youstilllayasleep,inyourstateofsilence,unawarethatIamherehoping,
waitingendlessly.Listenmylove,theworldthatweknowisending,themeta-
cityhasentereditsendstagewherethedarknessoftheskieswouldsoonbe
lifted.HowIwishyouwouldbeawakewithmewhenweseethefinalendtoour
exile.Ithasbeencountlessofyears,itseemedforeverthatwehadbeenhere
andthoughallthewhileyouhavebeendeeplyasleep,Ilayawakewithyouand
foryousoIcantellyouaboutthepainsandtheturbulencewehadtogo
throughthistimeofpurgatoryonearth.Nottorecounttoyoutheterrorfor
thesakeofrelivingit,butmoretocompareittothejoyIknowwewillfind
oncethisisallover.Butitsfinallyending,likeIhavesaidbeforeand
willcontinuetosayuntilittrulyends,forIhavetokeepthishopealive,
forus,foryoufortheentireracethathavebeenleftbehindsincethefirst
ravagingmindwave.Inournormalexistenceoftimeandspace,itwouldonly
beafewdaysawaytillthenewyearcomesandwewaitwithanticipationand
prayers.Prayersthatforsolonghavegoneunheeded,prayersthathave
broughtushere,tothenowwhensoonweshallbeliberated.Hangonmylove,
soonyoureyesshallopentoseethesunagain,Iknowitinsideme,inside
allofuswhohavesurvivedthemetacityanditsmonstrosities,weknowthat
therewillbeadawn.Justwaitwithus,yourprophecywillbereal,willbe
trueandyouwillreturn.
53

Onlyyoucansaveusmylove,onlyyoucansaveme.

Thefirstsignsarrivedyesterday,whenIhadfelttheworldaroundmeshift
initsenergies.Thefearthatwehavesolongbeenaccustomedto,turned
againstitselfandIheardthetribaldrumsoftheasceticsinthedistance,
beatingoutitswarcry,itscalltoarmsandforonceIsmiledinside,a
smilethatgoesbeyondanyrealcomprehension.Tosmileisanactthatis
trulytoosimple,toounderestimatedaword,toomundaneasoundtoexpress
thefreedomthathangsclosetoourhearts.Wewereinthebarestructureof
thechurchwhenweheardthesounds,thedrumsandwerushedtothewindows,
forthefirsttimenotfearingthatasharpshadowsofthemeta-dealerswould
grabusbyoursoulstostrikeusintoeternalpainandlooseusinthehell
thattheycreated.MyheartwasbreakingupagainforIfirstthoughtthatwe
hadfinallylostourmindsandwasstartingtohearthethingsweso
desperatelycravedtohear.

Thesoundsoffreedombeatinginthedistance

Butitwasrealforthehomelessones,whohadoncedreamedofthismoment
stumbledintothebrokenchurchcryingoutitishere.,theendofourexile,
TheAsceticAramageddahasarrived!andwebandedtogether,inthecoldand
peeredoutintothehauntedstreetsandsawtheredenergiesofthelightthat
hadhauntedusforsolongturndimandtheshriekingofthemeta-dealers
began.Thesoundwasterribleandatthesametimebeautifulforthenightmare
spiritsthathadtornhumanityapartsincethemindwavewasnowbeingtorn
apartbytheghostsofanti-thesis.Redlightingflashedmadlyintheskies
andthecloudsofblacksmokeswirledandbrokeapart,exposingbitsoftrue
space,allowingthesimplelightofdistantstarstoshinethrough.Theforms
ofthosedeadbuildingsroseintothenightsky,theconcreteblackwithsoot,
charredandcold.Theystoodlikemarkers,liketombstonesinacitythatwas
leftfordeadafterearthandherchildrenhaddiedsomanyyearsago.Butnow
54

thesebuildingsstoodasmonumentsofexpectations,andofhopeforitwas
withinthesebuildingswherethewarreallytookplace.

Strangeblackbloodseepedfromthewallsasmeta-dealersperishedonebyone
bythehandsoftheskeletonmonks.Onecouldhearthejangleofboneson
bonesrushingthroughtheemptyhallwaysandlobbies.Onecouldhearthelow
growlsoftheasceticsastheyhunteddownthemetadealers,infectingthem
withtheviraltoxinsthatwouldturntheirdarksoulsintopitsoffire.and
thesoundoffireburningwaslikethesoundofcorpsesscreamingthrough
rottingthroats,agutturalsongindisaster,anoisethatonlythedeadcan
makefordeadearsanddeadmindsanddarkness.

Thesoundofdarknessfalling

Iwillleavethismemoryofthisworldbehind.Andtakeyouwithme.
Theworldthatwehauntedourselvesinisfallingawayfast.
Iholdyourhandnow,youarestillasleepbutitdoesntmatter
Becausethefinalblindinglightwillbreakthroughthisdarkworld
Andwhenweareblindedwewillsee
Andwewillawakewitheachother
Inanothertime
Inanotherplace
And
"to save me" was a line of excuse. A queue down the lane of a molecular need.
And the sleep of the coma girl was a caricature of the real creature that is
breathing out its gaseous trauma. The beast raping the beauty shadowed in a
bloodlust kill. A media event it seeked. killing for fame and not for
catharsis or for the order in disorder, Or illness. the pathology fails. a
criminalogical error.
55

Hold me now.
before i kill again.
i am trapped in an ocean of diseased confusion
the war had ended, how long ago i cannot tell and there was supposed to be
deliverance but no
i am trapped between states
between that demon and that angel
tearing myself asunder
God help me, i know you are real and you are here (Emmanuel) you are with us

but
now there is dark confusion. i cannot tell where i am, physical>? psychic? in
spiritual desolation?

i believed that i would awake with her, the coma girl but am i awake or am i
dead in body but conscious in mind, trapped in another mind filled with these
terrible noise and chaos

where am i?
the war isover but the searing still haunts me
God help me.......
God Help me....
stripped from this logic inside
there is a tearing apart
a fading away. The coma girl is far away, further than we were when the war
raged and she slept.
56

i am sucked into an alternative dimension. I saw a mirror image of myself and
of a white flame being sucked into a window portal then they were gone. The
'they' that was 'we' and now
I , alone. AM trapped in my own mind, in some space. Lost. Key had warned me.
That damned creature of hellfire had told me of such things.
The multi-verses.
and so i must find myself, my way back to her , she whois somewhere. and i
wonder how i would live without her. I wonder now too
how would i survive all this.?

The tensioning gulf
this haunting space
the anti-love
disrupting grace
condemnation's claw
piercing grip
open jaws
bloodied teeth
fucking violence in this hole
this is hell as hell foretold
frictions realm
abrasive tones
dark. angular, forever
thisismygraveyardhome.
black lizards scuttling across the surface of this mud/soot realm
medication fails and brings no light/ the failure too of words and sentences
informed by the falseness of life

57

the metadealer does not crash when he falls, he has stopped the sensation of
falling and this realm he is in has stopped all of its voices

its a cliche to say only darkness is left
with a stench
its a cliche to say this is a nightmare
but here, all cliche fails, all attempts to document fails. This place has no
logic
darkness is a logic, a conceptual logical 'thing'
there is no

58

WRITINGSONTHEOUTHER
SIDE.

SAULentersthemarketplace.Thesubculturesarelooseonthestreets.Hebeginstospeak.

Hearyenovemberschylde.
nicotaniadeprivedinthissunandgrimcloudday
howintensivethestreetsare,afternoonblazeanddiscomfort
thenewleaseoflifecomesout,fillingthemanyinroadsandpathswiththeyoung
loudandforgetful
andallthedevilshavecomeout;themockersandthehollowghosts
driftingthroughthewhiteclub.
staringatbeautifulsoulsfacetofacewithoutthemeverknowing
seekingtherecessesoftheirheart,tofillthemwithhollowhorrorsandblindjourneys.
sointerveneddidIwithhistoricalsource
andinconfrontatia,ilostmypewtercross
traded,returnedtothefatherinexchangeforhisdefensivehand;
FrontedbytheimagerieofMaryandthefatherofChrist,andthesaintsofhopelessnessandcelestial
war
againstthelowfrequencyghostsofInferia

Thewhiteclubstillhauntedmethroughmysleep
aremnantpresence,structure'dandset-up
wheretheeyesofprovocateursroamtheseaofyoung
wherethemanytallanddisturbedcomeouttohunt.

Payattentionyoucelebratorypeople
forthethievesarecoming
fortheserpentsareloose
Bewatchfulinthenight
forIndirenovember
itisunlikeanyothernight.
59

ELSEWHERE

THETHIRDDAYOFRAININDIRE
NOVEMEBER>

weallarefreezing
inourredemptions.
we'velostourticketstothefair

Frombeyondthehill,idescendedintothenorthernvillage.
Ihadbeenwalkingfordaysandnights;andmuchneededaplacetorest.
Ienteredthevillage,headbowed,notwantingtofirghtenthem.Ilookfortheinnkeeper.
"whatmannerofcreatureartthou?"Thedoormanasks.
Thevillagersdonotknowme.
Theinnkeeperremarks."artthoufromthefair?fromthehiddenstages?"
"no.iturnedawayfromthecarnival,idonotcomefromit."
Theyalllaughatme,asislingmybrownhashbagdownmysecondback.
"youareadevil'screature!"Theblacksmithoffered
"nay,achangeling!"anotherargued.
"iamneithergoodsirs."Itrytoreasonwiththem,"imeanyouallnoharm."
"weshouldburnthisbeast!"otherscried.
"offwithitshead!"shoutedamotherwithbabeinarms.
"yesyes!snareandtortureandbrutalizeitskind!"
Adinisraisedaroundme.
Theyalladvance.
Itrytonotletmyhornsandclawsandteethgrow
butsometimesevenihavenocontroloverme.

Theyalladvance.
60

andifeelasadnesswashoverme.
thensomethingredwellsupinside...

muchlater
onlymuchlater

Therainputsoutthefiresinthevillage.
Ithankmygoddessforit.
Perhapsitisforthebetter
thatihadbreathedfirefollowingmyrage.
perhapsitsmuchbettertohavethebodiesburnedratherthanburied.

Iamcold.
Ididn'twishtodosuchthings,especiallytohumans,asupposedlyintelligentrace.

buttheyhadleftmewithnochoice.

TEMPLEOFMYSTERY

blackofnight
irecallthespiritcolours.
REDtheinevitable.
Black,theeternal
OrangetheNBLR.

discochurch
61

oldstentorianchief
beckoning
"Thedayofreckoningisnear."
Thegongisstruckthreetimes.

Cosmicpatterns.
Hesees.throughallthemusicandpopliterature.
Shesees.
ferventlywritingwithnostop
arefractionofmyloadedpast.
Isee
withsightnew,dutyweighted
calling,loud.

Thecards.Thoughnonespoketome
Ihadalreadyspokenback.

TheGrace.
howoldwewillgrowtogether.
TheTempleofmystery
tilltheend,theeverpresent.
Themoon,Diana.
tilliamwithyouagain.

Tomypeople.

Iholdallofyouinmyheart.

Post11:11
Posted11:12
Imaginationisanalteredstateofconsciousnessenteredatwill
Theforcesiknowareprimalperceivedasfuturist
Theonlywayicantrulyuseadeckasatoolistocreateoneofmyown.

great
62

greataccidentinbrain
stomachempty
noseefutuerebright
bigaccidentinbrain
onlynowbright
bigbiglightmakeIblind.
Iblind,handmoveeverywheretowalk
greataccidentinbrain.
otherIcomingoutinbrain
IfeelotherI
OtherIbecomeI
seethegreensmokingplantIam
sitdown
makefirewithstone
greensmokingplantinhand
imakelikemoon
findstick,igo,
bigstick,takeoutbodyleaveskin
usesharpstone
sharpstonebreakwood
makebodycomeoutleavehardskin
greensmokingthingputinhole
imakefire
makefireandburngreensmokingthing
ibreathhard
ibraethhard
accidentinbrain.

SICKMATA
The sadhu, fascinated with their pipes
offer me more, of their mythic smoke
and in my secretion and in my half-dazed pain
of being in anotehr dimension, they tell me of more patterns
"you have heard the voice of your eternal she,
and saw her as a woman,
and now, though oracular,
63

she still takes the beating
so that on her verge of crying
you feel terrible cold on your spine
The same world you are beginning to reject has hurt her
and now your vengeance have taken root
in the posion you kept up for your sacred curse
be warned when the Lord mighty has lost his patience
so you, the dam shall break
and gust forth will be your crumbling words
sanctioned to detail the elaborate fall
how filled with contempt you've been
against the lights and disparate distractions
where whole beings are submerged
in the magic act of the senses
transform;'d through wicked dreaming
and of childs play in uptown offices
How fast we've grown to resemble each other
where the things we despise become the only act to follow
how we mirror our monstrosities
how others become like us and we like the others
does that not prove then the inherent theorem?
that the circles between two thoughts cannot be a whole?
wherin our experience differ in minutae degrees
sufficient enough the be gestalted into idolatory
where we worship the figure before as our selves
blespheming against our natural order
for we are gods only unto ourselves
and tobe like someone else starts gods against each other
and whereelse would such challenges be encountered
here then on our borrowed land
do our first mother be consumed
but the sound of battle cries and steel mentala
how catastrophic, the exchange of temples
where memory, traded become
demons destructa
and how in our schizophrenia
borned of attempts to merge
are doomed to tell us
the fervent secret
that we hath become our originators
64




you can't get there
from here
how the fever hits
a terrible outspelling
all..you..people...'
How ironic the song sung
on this sun, sank the heart
the absent,
the train ride farther in.

'i thirst.'
our dying friend
watcher of our little power games
our failing lessons
our mighty ressurections

this phoenix have fled
all roots in morality
giv'n up upon the instance
when the shamana descends

chase the tail of the serpent
sliding down the erect'd pile of mgick
touching the ashen base of the world unknown
of a destitute city bathed in eternal red light
65


O'how our purgatory had come.

- Excerpts from "Our song to the red city."
oral tradition. unpublished.





Book4
Thedisjointedbookof
66

R

By
AnonRa

67

WARNING
CONTAINSEXPLICITSCENES.

68

RELEASE

Redscentdescendingintheair,ofnight,ofovercrowdedskies.Travelpasttheirongates,lockedand
consumdinitsownchainsofsatisfaction.Apeeringintothedarkformlessalleyways,withthedistilled
fogrisingfromsubterraneaIeyetheredskydescendtheharrowingcatcallsofnight,circumventingthe
whoreswhostandalignedbytheroadshores,sellingswollenvaginalcavestotheirbarbaric
counterparts.
Thisterriblecity,IcansmellitsstenchfromthisloomingmonsterImin,ridingthegravenroadtothe
Hangman;sHall.Sleetthekillerdebrisfallsfromavengefulgod,piercingthedenizensofoldwhohave
beencalleduponandfoundwanting.Thereisnowritonthewallsofthisbabyloniaforitstowering
concretewatchersareinitselfbeastlyanduncommontothehidingfolk.Ismellbloodintheairtonight
andthemonsterbeneathmewrithes,itswheelsstoppinginitsowntracks,fearingordisallowedto
moveforward,Icannotrecall.Icrawloutofthebeastandontothestreetspavedwiththetearsof
surrendereddebutantes.Ifollowthesenseandthatofhercalling.
Hervoice.
Whatsoundsthatcomefromacavesealedshutinstone.
Blackerthenightbecomesandthebrokenraysfromthebrokenspheresaboveilluminetheseathat
cursesthegrounditdrownsin.Thedrainscloggedwithragsanddiscardedclothes.
Walk,pacedownthewaysofthestreets,twistingandturningdeeperintothesuicidalstateofamindin
complicata.IheartheanglesofthedeceasedandIfollowhertrail,asleekladyinblackthatoncewasa
witch.ElongatedhairtwistedandthickandIfollowedhercriesthroughthehauntedstreetsofblacknoia.
AttheotherendsheturnsthedistanceandIfollowtheotherredcallofhervoice.Themonstersbythe
roadsgratetheirmetalintowoodandstoneastheyscreechacrossthebusystreetswherethegangsters
havecomeouttofornicatewiththetransvestitemafiasoma,Themanycavedcreatureoftheater.He
laughingorgasmscreamsagainstthechasmoftheopeningbroilsinthesky.Thedenizenrunsunderthe
infernorainandweenterthecavernsofthisdrenchedandviolatedcity.

Thetunnelsarehotandthestationspackedwiththehomelesscrusadersandbumsandstreetdwellers
ofthecity.Thehanginghallsarecallingcallingtheyechosometimesinunisonbutmostofthetime
not.Ineedtobewheretheselectedare,thisnoisehereobscuresme.Icanfeeltheirhorridresonance
69

inmybones.TheplaceshiftsthestreetsabovebecomethestreetsbelowandIambytheroadagain,
theblackhorsespulltheircarriagesofcallousyoungmenwiththeirleadingladies.Theeveofallsaints
bringthemoutintothecitytonightandeveryothernightforceasesnotthecelebrationsofthewitch
craftianage.Iascendthesubwaywombandenterthestreetsabove,adifferentclashof
nanotechnologyandorganicstreetculture.Thetimeseemstoodistancedandobfuscated.Thewrong
futurethewrongage.Followhercall

Followhervoice.

Thedrizzlecomesuponthesestreets,thechillfeelscorrectinthefullmoonshiningyellowsickabove.
Themoonturnsredwitheverypassingvehicle.Transvestitesrunfromacrossthestreetsandintherain
Ifeelthehcillinmybones.Ifollowthem.Fortheytoohearhervoice.Theroadislongandtheclubsand
puringliquidlightoutwiththemusictosuckintheneon-ageinearlynewmillennium.

2006.

Red,Thecityoflightascendsinthenight,flashinghersignsinthesky,awaitingherpeople.Youngand
adventurousinthissophisticatedsocietytheytransversedifferentlandscapestofindtheirsouldancing
inintoxicateandthestreakofelectricdruqs.IfindthisplacesimilartoalltheotherlevelsofroadsI
travel.Tonight,thetransvestitesbringmetoher.Tothehanginghallswherethroughherdoors,your
livesarechanged.Yourmindyourlanguageyourstatealtersthroughthereddoorswherethe
transvestiteshadentered.Thelulloftheplaceisasarchaicasthemoon,forthroughthosedoors,she
willbethere.Waiting.Calling.

Istepthrough.
Istepthrough.
Reekingofalcohol,smokeandexoticherbs,theelongateddingyroomstankoftoomanybattlesfought,
andwearisomeclouds,morelikeafogofdarknightsinasoullessplace.Shewastheonlyrealsoulhere.
Shewasntonstage.ButIcanhearherbreathinginthisnoise.Thebarmanisshoutingthejukeboxis
screaming,theelectriclicksofathousandguitarsinababbleofnoise.Midnightlighttwirlswiththe
yellowmoon,aslitteredstarsfallinthisloungeattheendoftheworld.redbulbsflareinthedistance,
photographersscurryacrosstheroomlikeinsectstheircirculareyeslightuplikehealdights.Heavymen
withsheensofsweatsitintheirtoosmallchairswaitingforhertocomeout.Adeeprootedvoicetakes
holdspeakingthus
70

Howmuchthesehatredfeels,howmuchpastthesedarkvisionshave.
Drawnwiththeirelongatedsnakesintothepitofthegoddess.

VerilylikeanomenIheardthesewordsandthecrowdintheroomhadthickened,andthedensityof
thesesoulsbegintheweightmedown.Ifindaseat,steadyandintoxicatedwiththeenergiesinthe
room.Theslinkofawaitressarrives,smellingofcheapsexandhomelessmothers.watchadrinkin
stranger?aperfectdrawl,toomuchheroin.ladyA.oooooambitiousboyaintcha.Shestealsawink
butIsearchforthetobacco.Shedepartsandmyheadformsminethoughtscloserknitacrossthemind
ofamanypoets.Throughthedoorstheysaytheghostchanges,andsoinmyskin,thewetnessofthe
placecrawlsandIamtransformed,firstinthoughttheninsenses.Thefog,lifted,sinksitsclawsinto
gravityandhumblesher.Theweightofthisworldsolidifiesinmybones.Ashiverrunsthroughmeand
mythoughtsbecomeclearer,lessabstracted,focusedonherbreathing.

Thebabbleofnoisecontinueswiththewhispersofmiddleagedgangstersfillingmyearslikeaterrible
hissofadeadchannel.Ihearthebreathsofthewhoresastheyareenticedbythelowvoicesofsuch
dangerousmen.IsensethedamnedwetnessbetweentheirthighsandItuneout,asItuneoutofthe
talk,dirtyandconfusing.ThemusicpiercesmeinanuncontrollablerageandIfighttomanagethenoise
inmyhead.Idampenthenoiseandtuneoutthemusic.Followherheartbeat.Followherheartbeat.A
thousanderoticvesselsfloodmyhearingandthethumpingoverwhelmsme.Ishutmyeyesagainstthe
glareofthestageandthenoiseoframpantheartbeatsfadeawaytillthereisonlyone.Ihearit
quiverforithadfeltmineeyesuponit.
ShenowknowsIamhere.
ForIhaveheardtherhythmofherbloodbetweenthesilences.

Strangelythisplacechanges,ametamorphunseen.
Andthroughthedoor,itissaid,hewhoentersalsochanges.

Ajazzclubnow,itsfinalform.Thesweatisdenseintheair,thehotbreathofthetrumpetplayers,
exhaled,fillingthisvolume,thisexoticplace.Aroundmethepeopleareswinging,likesome1940sjoint.
Butsomodernwevebeen,halfofthesepeopleareclones.mimesinahorriddanceofmasterand
puppet.Thereareotherobersevrshere,quickeyesforaquicktarget,

71















72













RED

73

ROOT
Howthedogshadbarkedonthenightofmyinitiation
Intheblackroomwherethegasmaskslayuponthewall
Allaroundusthesoundofinnocencedying
Anechooflifestirringtheserpentinthegut
Howawakeditdbecome
Coiledandancient,theprimeularofgraheg.
Inthemistofmygruesomenakedness
Ikneltbeforethemother-ugly
Obese,blackskinnedDiahrrah
Hershroudoftight,tangledblackworms
Rosefromherdeformdhead
Bulgingcheeksandbruisedlips
Herflesheateneyesstareoutatme
Herlargedownwardhangingbreast
Leakedofanoxidemostfoulfromherpoisonednipple
Blackenedteethcancerous
74

Herlimptongueslithers
Likeaslimemostvile
Speakinginthickchokedgurglesofphlegm
Shesaidthus:
Birthdbethesnake
Darkgreensicklyblack
Writhinginthebellyofthedisaffected
Comeuntohim,yourawaitedfroth
Comeforththroughhisskin
Crawlingtoserveyourmajesticdread.
Andgraheg,theworm,innervates
Openingitsdistendedjaws
Likethebloatedpythonconsumingthelamb
Andthelambwassentforthtome
Inpublic,chained,theterrifieddaughter
Screamingwithoutsound
AndIsawthenauseatingvision
Ofmother-uglycrawlinguponallinnocence
Blackwormsslitheringagainsttheleatherfacedbride
Nakedinterrorum
Andshecalledmebymysecretname
TheIgniterofsightsinhuman
Grosteque,monstrous,unnatural.
AndIcameforthtotheunholymatrimonyofbodies
Onallfours,masked,andcollard
75

Andmother-matronunlockedmyface
Thegasmaskedexposedmyredandaccursedeyes
Forhavingsightedthisactofdisturbingunion
AndImountedthethree-breastedmonstermother
Nowalteredinherghastlypleasure
Crushingbeneathher,thewrithingfragility
Ofaflowertrappedonhurtingfields
Eyesrolledupbehindimpossibleblinds
Thethreshinglamb,soundless,eatenalive
Bypowers,ravagingandletloosedonthisearth.
Itheinitiator,
Witnessandcallerofthemanynames
Calledforthtobethefather-diabolia
Themisaligneroffamilymostfoul.

CardLUST.

Afat,nakeddiseasedskinmaninablackleatherheadharnessishuggingaboundandgaggedgirlfrombehind.
Hisrightarmistuckeduphertshirt,handclampedonherleftbreast.Hislefthandisabouttosnakeintothecrotchofherwhitepanties.Sheis
screamingintohergag,hereyeswidewithterrorandtears.

76

77

andsointhethirdcycleofmyonlineexistance,thejournalthatarchitecture'dlifeamongtheelectro-
museswashijackedbytheprincesofskeleta.

Therattlingoftheirboneswereheardwheniarrivedhomeat4inthemorningsomenightsback.Iwas
walkingalongthesmallroadthatledtomywatchtowerwhen,fromthetrees,theinhumancallsof
whatsoundedlikeprehistoricbirdsrangoutacrosstheechoofmorning.Thedenizensofthevillage
wereallfastasleepintheircrypticdreaming;ofunicornsandheadlessinsects.Thecallswerenot
chillingbutalternata.Attheothersideofthevillage,acarrespondedtothecall,agrossimpersonation
oftheinhumancryforbattle.Ireachedthewatchtowerwherethegolemontheplatformabovehad
droppedtheredropesofR,asignofwelcomeandhappyreturntothehallsofR.Iascended,while
feelingthepresenceofthoseotherworldlyrattles.

"sire"thegolemgreeted."Thereareblackboneswaitinginintheroom."
imademywayacrossthemainhallwheremother-Afriokahadturnedinthetide,theseaofsalt
crashingagainstthecabinetsofmylong-lineofancestralcaligaris.Thedoorsofthecabinetsbanged
openandshutbuticouldnotseethecreatureshidinginside....

Themadpriestofgarheg,withhistwistedhairofblackpinetreesemergedfromtheravagingkitchen.
"Doyouwanttoeatthefeetofthechildren?"Heaskedinhisbubblinggroan.

78

"No,keepthem."

Hegrinsasienterthesanctuary.

Theroomwasdark,andstankofdogpissandheat.Blackoblivioncreptfromthebedwheretherewasa
bundle,ashiveringcreaturebeneathit.Aroundthebedtheskeletastood,intheblacksingingbonesand
chatteringteeth,teachingandtellingmeoftheirwaysbeforeIexecutemine.

Ibroughtoutmyculinarytools,theforkknifeandtheblade,theburninghandandtheeyeofdystopia.
Andtheskeletawatchedmeasiunveiledthecreaturebeneaththeblanket....

RAPE.

Reminiscehersweetyoungface,daughterearth.Goddessinskin,freshwithherflowersandbirds.Light
blueskiesinthewhitecloudsofyondershereveals.Fertilegrounds,untouchedandnew.Birdsong
escapesthedistantdepthsbutthebeautywebeholdendwiththedisturbance.Theriverturnedblack,
tautandunwindingaroundandaroundher;hardandimpenetrable.Clumpsoftherivercaughtinthe
79

channel,unmoving,coagulated,choked.Thereisagrowlintheneardistanceandfeardescends.
Raindrops,sheensofrainslowlyfalling.Acoldwindrisesinthegutoftheearthandinthebeast,who
standethbeforeherfairfields.Uponmanythundershedothmakepresence,ridingtheblackfabricof
theuniverseintotheelongatedspearofquakesandviolation.Theearthturns,boundinherorbit,
graspedintheten-foldstormofthesenselessman.Fromsubterraneahecomes,fromforcesprimallike
thatoffire.Inillmannerismheprogresseduponhishairyfeetandrudetongue.Theearlymanchances
uponthegoldmineofthedirt.Heproclaimsthedoortoinfinity.Progress.Forward.Thelightofreason
comesoninthedark,andwewitnessthetremblingcreature.Innocentandwithoutsin,tillthetowering
beastfromabovedescendswithfruitofdis-pleasurableknowledge.Fortoknowlightistoknowdark
andtoknowserenityistoknowterror.Terrorsinthenight.Hercharmingsundecreasesinhislightand
plungedissheintoworldsblack,fortheblackeningcloudssealsoffthemoonlightsightandhergrounds
areleftinblindness.

Onlyagutturalnoiseescapesherquiveringbody,theatmospherechangingasheroceanawaitsina
sunlessland.Thethundershadloosedthetopofmountains,anduponthecrumblingrocksofherworld,
hercavesaresealed.Someonlytemporary.Thefirstquakeendsandthebeastoftheasteroidarrives.
Forward,thesmallerrocksstreakthroughherairthenslowfallontoher.Thenightisunveiledasthe
moonisknowntorise.Minutebyminute,unveilingallmannerofcreaturesofthenighttimescaredand
thevulnerableandofthepredatorsthatprowlinfieldsdark,watchersinthetrees,wormsintheground,
snakesinthelairs.

Theraincontinuestofalluponhernimblegroundsasthesecondseriesofthunderscameforthfromthe
beastofman.FourtimeshethunderedforInnakednesshestripstheearth,layerbylayertoclothehis
absencefrometernity.

Inthefirstthunder,Hebroughtthewindsthattoreherflowerbedsasunder.Fromthelowernorthto
thesouth,thepetalswerestrippedfromtheirstalks,onebyonetillherrawgroundbeneathexposed.
Theunsettlednestsnowinupheaval,laybarebeforethebeast.Sheetofsnow,coversherlandsandin
thestormthatcamewithgentleviolence,didremovdtheice.Fromhercore,aburstofenergyescapes
andthelandsshook,defyingthethundersandthebeastofman.

Butthemanadvanced,withhisarmyoflabourers,enslavedtotheirmastersvoice,throughthesquare
boxesthatshineakindoflight,filledwithlifeanditscounterpart,lie.Andshetriedtostophimbut
boundonlytoherself,therewasnooneelsetoprotecther,forhersunhadgoneandthestarsonly
lookedonfrommillionsoflightyearsaway.

80

Inthesecondthunder,camethesoundoftheswellingseas,herskirtedislandsshunnedthespreadof
eaglesflightacrossherblanksky.

Inthewhiteheatofherlight,itisremovedanddarknessfallsacrosstheland.

Intohermnysterythetyrantmysticpenetrates
Thesouldefilerenters
Andintheworld,allremainsdark.

REVELATION ONE

RECOVERY

81

RED MAN
In the lounge the prince of skeleta asks, who is the RED MAN?
He who intervened.

and he is coming.

REVELATION TWO
And so it was writ /Many the transgressors gathered
To savour the sweat of R in the air
The sweet succinct voice of retribution/

Tonight it shall come to pass.

As with three of us, your monsters were created, so it shall be
three of us when you all shall be destroyed.



I must betray and kill my own demon/mother.

82

RECKONING

The RED MAN cometh
People in the sanctuary.
Finders of the transgressors
The executioners of judgements red hand.


Thentheredmancameandinmyworld,therecameashrillliketheslaughterhausofbanshees.

REST

83

ENDLINES

Ivestartedeverywhereinthisbooke;thisenigmaencyclopediathatsurroundstheunfathomableRED
IDOL.Somuchwasspokenaboutityetnothinghadcometomeansomethinginparticular.The
vaguerieshavetakenovercompletely;strangevoicesofmusictellsusofsunsandofafterlife,andof
echoesacrossspaceandime.Anditsghostsstilllingeraboveuslikeazeitgeist.

Azeitgeist.

Intheend,itwasazeitgeistthatcamethroughourtime,throughourlivesandtookpartsofuswithit.
Likeaterribledescendingpredatorybird,largerthanouruniverseyetalwayscontained,withinthe
multiverse,themanyworlds,whichintotalnumberalwaysgrowing,willalwaysbethatgreaterthing
beyondourlivesinthisuniverse.Thisearththatallofyouknowandhavecometolove.Buthow
terirbkeapricewemayforourmisanderings,forforeverourmindsaretransformedbythedepthof
thisstudy.Foronlywhenyouhavestudiedthesetextsofexperimatawillyoutrulyunderstandthe
difficultyinkeepingallofittogether.

Azeitgeisthadcomeandallwethoughtweknewwillcometopass.Allthatweknowwilldie,our
immortalideas.Ourprogressiveimagination.

Whoareyou?
Whoarewe?
Whenweveacceptedthatweareeveryoneelseinline.Howcanweeverunderstandthis,ifnotfora
momentwehadbenethrustinthatflashofvisionandunderstandingwhenweveenteredourminds
intosomeoneelsethorughourown.

Theauthorofthisbookmayhavebeencryingwritingthis.Hemayhavebeendesperateandalone
anddying.Hemayhavebeenanelaborateprankster.Hemayhavebeensomeonesloverbutinthe
84

endwedontknow.Wemayknow,soonenough,whenthetearsinoureyeshavehealed.How
haveyoureadit?mybeloevdreader?Howwillyoueverunderstandme.

Aplea?

No

Azeitgeisthadcomeandgone.Andpartofmehasgonewithit.

05hours34minuteslefttozerohour.

WHITESPACE

Empty

AndthereIsawJesu.
Andhesaid,Ididntknowyoucoulddothis.
Andisaid,dowhat?

Thefutureconsumesme
andalongwithititssisternames,fuetere,fueter,faeteur,futuorearrives
AndIbecametheelectricREDintheirincantations
Ofacidicfloodinhex0000
85

Thespiritthatisyettobe
ThespiritthatIhaveyettobecome.
Themysteriumthirdmind.
Backwardglancingvisionfromthefuture
AndItraveledbetweenit
Thistimeandthattime
Inallourillusionsoftime
AndfromthefutureIcame
AndIhavebecometheREDMAN.

Operaofthesandking

Ungratefilwerethehghooves
Ofthesandcoloredhorse
Unabletokeepstill
Feareatingitlikeinsects
Thestallionsrider
Looksnorth,graven
Hisfacemeyeslocked
Indanger
Watchingthehorizon
Breathbated
Waiting
Forwhatmythscalled
Thebleedingofthesky
86

thehorseisdisturbed
grunting,exhalationsdeep
thesandiseatingintothebvoovesandlegs
Thesandkingcannotdoathingaboutit
Theyskybeginstobleed
Throughtheashensandyatmosphere
ComesbloodinfireRED,likeaninferno
Sprawlingfromawoundacrosstheheaven

Book5

AlternataDIEMArupturebythezeitgeisticdeparture
87

Saulagainstthetide.(adreaminprogress)

dying stories


It is said, that one mans demon is, another mans weakness.
And in weakness occurs death, in-repetitia and cyclical.
Then death shall wear out the mighty
And the weary shall wear out the cities youve built for death and her consort.

Across the planet, in a remote city, a killer waits by the bed side of his victim; waiting for her to
be roused from the chemical sleep he put her through. He waits, also, for the voice to tell him
what to do; how to handle her. his patience wears thin, for he had waited for the last three days
for the voice. For the message. for the answer. He waits.

across the other side of the earth, in a high-rise suburban neighborhood, a much younger man
tosses and turns in bed. it has been three days since he had visioned the toxic death of a
nameless man. Three days since he had seen the killer waiting by the side of the bed where his
victim lay unconscious. she is unconscious, chained, defenseless and the young man who visions this,
is restless, and struggling not to think more about the woman, because it will only make him think
those thoughts, do those actions, and fulfill his erotic desire for erotic death. He struggles not to
play out his private fantasy but his flesh is weak. He touches himself then stops. does it again then
holds back. The pain becomes worse every night. He thinks he will slip tonight, break the vow for
a few seconds of bliss. he pleads with his other self, pleads for it to let him go and allow him rest
and concentration but the desires wont leave him. a heat rises in his body, his mind rushing with
random methods of murder. He fights, as he had always fought but in the end, he slips.

a voice is heard across the planet. in the city. in the unlit apartment. a man is dead in his own
bathtub, his body shriveled up like a dry prune and shrunken, open jawed, skin turning a paler
blue.
The killer hears the voice and is finally set free.
88


In a village, a girl is walking in the dense forest. She falls to her knees. crows suddenly flutter
overhead like panicked birds. she begins vomiting. she calls her father between each surge of sickness.
she calls her father, the village shaman, to come.
fatherthe land has stopped breathingfather

a wolf runs through the dense forest towards the sound of a vomiting girl.


the killer walks by the city light. soon the sun shall rise and he shall be in agony, but for now he
stalks the streets. Looking for that next turn, that next alley way, the next victim.

the village girl is brought back to her hut. Her eyes are wide with being scared. Her father is allowing
the grey smoke from the pipe to wash over her, to clear the way so that he can see what she had seen.
He calls upon his ancestors, those powerful enough to transverse death, to come explain to him the
plight of his daughter and the sickness that has gripped her.

Across the earth, in a semi-darkened room, a young man writes. He writes a story about a village
girl and a victim, and a killer. He has no more use for the dead man in the bathtub. such toxic
death makes him sick. He writes about all of them for he sees all of them in his heart and in his
mind. tired and restless, he looks for living answers among the dead, the dying and the sick. He
calls upon each of them, and they come to him in the form of pain, twisted and aching, subtle and
overwhelming.
his body feels cold.
The stillness of the air discomforts him.

He hears the sound of a village girl crying. the sound of angry elders. the sound of a shaman
coming like a storm over the horizon as the sun slowly moves toward morning.
But the skies are silent and the silence scream back, her last drawn breath of free air.


50 years old.
PAUL 9/9/08 12:07 AM
Comment: Little girl
89


Hes supposed to be retired but they needed him for the case.
one of the life cycles had dropped dead in the desert, but its mind overshadowed that of the current cycle.
for a quarter of a life, the body lived with a surrogate mind. a ramnant. broken pieces of many lives. just
a shard, a confusion.
a mass confusion.

this man sits in a coffeeshop, a few dawns after the last earth had ended.
everything of earth now as it is seen are suspended memories.
we're reliving off the memory of the earth as it fades away
allowing us time to adjust to our abrupt end.
language breaks down even in safe structures.
certain words have changed meaning.
context appears non context.
its difficult and compulsive.
to argue
to speak.

focus.
investigate. provide gestalt theorem.
stop abstracting.

the man is smoking a cigarette.
only one, over and over again in looped time
but his thoughts move foward, in the illusion of real time
looking for answers.

He waits at the coffee shop. writing in a little red book. drinking the always recurring iced tea with milk
manipulating cigarettes, writing, watching the phone that pulses to life in a pale light.
rock music in his ears.
he thinks
he builds
he makes the connections. he waits.

minus twenty four hours.

it was easier yesterday.
around the table with the other elders.
reinventing histories instead of recovering them.
the observed and influenced the tides of change
over the game board
over the grey smoke, lighthearted sinai & the holy ash bowl.
speaking to each other with no words
only thought.
when telepathy had taken over television
PAUL 9/9/08 12:07 AM
PAUL 9/9/08 12:07 AM
Comment: Shaman-mindspace
Comment: Shaman-mindspaces mind
90

this was possible.
only yesterday.
now the days are traded.
no more the easy yesteryears of the future.
they've cut the lifeline to what was real
abandoned us to this floatilla campaign of false thoughts. fast false fading thoughts.
we shouldn't have opened fire.


plus twenty four hours.


far removed from the subject of his enquiry
the old man thinks of a methol cigarette and smokes it.
he thinks of the abandonment of his own shores
and now adrift in the landless sleep.
the old woman behind him, standing next to her food stove is blind
or appears blind. the white of her eyes like a pale glow of light, frightens those who watch her too long.
she never sleeps.
she stands there to keep herself warm in this winter.
she sees and knows
but she still wishes to sell her food.
"even the dead, eat." she speaks to him.
She sees that he is writing about her
portraying her as a memory gone cold, knowing
it is cold here.

very cold.






in the end,i didnt think it would be the little girl. Just me and her sitting on top of a car next to the
world that is dead. she was trying to draw out the last breath of humanity on the little napkin that
she found but the napkin was soggy and couldnt take the ink from the pen she had pried from
dead hands.I tried using the other pens that were around, to write out the last breath of the
people on scrap paper that were lying around but everything was too damp. Too cold and wet.
And quiet. The girl finally throws the pen to the floor and stares at the wet road. none of these
pens work. i said to her, here. handing a few of them over, throw them to the ground for me.
she shook her head, you throw them, youll feel better that way and well both feel better. i
PAUL 9/9/08 12:07 AM
PAUL 9/9/08 12:07 AM
Comment: GUN
Comment: Little girl
91

obliged her, tossing them far into many different directions. she seemed vaguely amused at first,
then just another blank expression took over. its stupid. she said, she was listening to the soft
ambient music coming from the black skies above. whats stupid? the music. its not stupid, its
calm and nice. the worlds dead, of course everything is calm, maybe not so nice. but the music
is just stupid. not right for this kind of time i pushed myself off the car, and walked to the one
opposite me. i checked to see if it was locked. she continued, they should be playing some piano
songs instead, you know the type that makes you think of summer gardens, and tea and big
butterflies? i suppose i told her, trying the other car handles. youre not listening to me. she
complains. i heard you i heard you.butterflies you said. tsk she climbed off the car. nothing
good here, i said, come on, lets go find a cafe. she tagged along as i walked off towards
another road. you hungry? she asked me. no,no,just wanted to see the cafes, ya know, with
no one around, and no noise and action,i just wanted to see. theyre all the same. really?
umm-hmm. she skipped alongside me as i took my time, strolling along the abandoned cars, The
bodies. She wasnt scared of them, which surprised me, but then i thought, shes older than me, she
wouldve seen so much more and so much worse. this whole place is stuipd. she suddenly said.
now why you say something like that?
it deserves to become like this. really? you think they brought all this on to themselves? its
obvious that happened. look at all the faces of these dead people. they are terrified. i dont
know, some of them look sad. only a small few. i think theyre sad because they did what they
could for all these others but they still died terrified. They were all terrified of the thing they
neglected.
and so the thing they neglected came back and... this happened?
a whole lotta things happened at the same time but...yah...mostly, the thing they neglected
came back.

i wanted to be sure about what she was saying so i said, the butterflies.
she looked up to me.

you didnt forget the butterflies right? thats why were here. I never neglected them.
i nodded my head, we kept walking. i kept a few of them you know. i really loved them.
i didnt quite know what to say to her. she then ran ahead of me, into one of the cafes. The music
was still on. strange i thought, then remembered that the radio stations all ran on computers. i
wondered when the last song would be played, or would it ever stop playing? was the systems
caught in an eternal loop of music that never moved past the last music update? how long more till
all the power ran out and the computers die alongside their makers? for a few moments those
questions sounded like the most important ones in the world, then it just meant nothing at all, in
contrast to the broader reality that was the present. she had vanished behind the counters, and i
just settled into one of the window seats, playing with the teaspoon that stuck out of the sugar
bottle. her voice came out loud from inside, theres some milk here,. and cakes. you want cakes?
go ahead, im ok. she came out with an unopened bottle of milk and a saucer with two
92

chocolate sponge cakes. we dont need to eat, im just greedy. she said sheepishly. i just smiled
a lilttle, and looked out of the frosting windows as she settled in to eat. i wished i could see more
across the city in this blackness. what else more i wished to see, i didnt know. there was
everything for the naked eye then there was everything for the unseen eye; but we both had seen
all, had seen it. The butterflies. i looked at the girl, not even 11 yet there was already so much
heaviness in her eyes and at the same time, so much lightness because she was enjoying her
chocolate cake and milk. i watched her eat. i couldnt think of anything else to do. she licked
chocolate sauce off her fingers. is the sun really brighter at the other side? she asked. i
shrugged, if the sun likes you. then maybe. a rumble grew from the distance. she sounded a
little more hurried, theyre coming to take the place soon.
i peered out again to the blackness, yeah.
i expected you to be older.
i looked at her. i didnt expect this at all.
what did you expect?
that id be dead. that someone else will take you and walk over.
are you sad?
i couldnt really answer her.come on. i said. lets go the playground.
a deeper night had fallen. i tried to remember how long ago the last tick of the clock was but
time becomes more elusive, harder to feel or believe.

everything's blurring out,my vision, sight, my breathing,my thinking. its becoming smaller, less
important,more random. a ricochet of meaning in a deconstructed world. a slowly vanishing place.
we couldnt find the playground, and soon the roads started to lead no where and then the roads
themselves stopped appearing. this place is colder, without the insects and the animals and the
birds. didnt matter that the humans were gone, what they left behind was already a testament to
their apparent greatness. a chunk of wasted,reprocessed earth. a great amalgam that wouldnt
speak now or make a sound. i cannot feel nature anymore.

she started sobbing quietly as we walked.
i asked her as softly as i could without sounding like i was talking to a child.
why the tears?
im starting forget.
its ok you know. it all falls away faster and faster. hurts more to hold on, just let them pass
alright?
93

she stopped to hug my leg. i decided to treat her like a kid in the end, and carried her onto my
back. she clung on to my neck and we walked. in no particular direction. for no real reason we
walked. we werent even waiting. we just started to forget more and more. deeper the night
came. the rumbling in the distance was softer, further. i walked, she slept a little, less thoughts
came to my mind. we passed thegreat house by the lake. the one i always wanted to live in as a
child. hey, i said softly to her, you want to go in and sleep? her reply was a softanything. i
knew she was already almost forgotten.
without trouble, we got into the house and i carried her upstairs. the pictures, photos, and
paintings on the walls were already forgotten, along with the furniture, bits of the ceiling,
ornaments, showcases, glassware. largely forgotten, barren, sitting on empty tables and voiding
drawers. emptying themselves of colors and forms.

i put her on a soft bed but she had woken up and wanted to sit up.we staying here tonight? is
this the long time place?
as long as we can keep it here.i assured her.
i want it colder. she asked.
i dug out whatever memory i had of this place around christmas and brought the temperature
down.
can i have a nice bear to hold?
i had to break her heart but i knew she would understand.
i cant honey, ive...forgotten.
its ok. she then looked at me, suddenly with a soft special feeling. do you want to see her
another

no i cut her off. not tonight anymore. i needed a cigarette. you gonna sleep?
not yet. i want to...remember some people.
ok. i need to go find some cigarettes. you just sit tight alright?
she nodded her head and i left the room. I tried to remember. the foul distaste. the burnt
offerings. skin on skin. Then the pack of menthol cigarettes turned up on the side table by the main
door. a key or two was also there. the rumbling outside grew louder.

the girl started shouting, as if from a nightmarecome in! come in!
94

i lit the cigarette and walked back to the room, locking the door behind me. i removed my shirt
as my scars were moving, elongating like snakes along my body. there was no blood, for blood is
forgotten. no more nakedness, for nakedness is forgotten. she had changed into a red dress and
snuggled under the comforters. they are coming. they are coming! she said excitedly. i wasnt
too sure. i was afraid. the rumbling got louder. i climbed into bed with her, held her in my arms.
we closed our eyes then the crowds broke through the house, i could hear them knocking over
whatever was left remembered outside. The first wave of the stampedes, the house was shaking
under all that running. people running outside and through the house, hundreds dashing past like
trains on many tracks, all moving in one direction, rapidly like wild waters, rushing rushing to
remember the east and its sun. the girl hid under the covers. the people ran and never stopped to
take us. but we knew that. no one would take us now. no one would wish to see us. the running
eventually stopped. the sound of thundering feet on wood drew closer then farther then close then
gone. the lamps in the house was still swaying.
didthey take everything? the girl asked, like a timid mouse form under the covers. i needed to
find that out too so i got out of the bed, to the window and i drew the curtains aside. it was true.
it had happened. the buildings are gone i told her, after peering out into the ever darkness to
realize there were no more tall dark figures in the distance. less stars too.

they wont take all the stars.
they were supposed to. i said.
some are ours, they cant take them, we take them.
i considered what she said. it would be more difficult to travel but she was right. we had to take
them.
how many can you carry?
i wanna sleep, can we carry them after our sleep?
it was risky, she could be forgotten if she slept now but i didnt want to push her.
ill keep an eye on you, so you wont be forgotten. sleep, sleep. ill help you take the stars
tommorrow, whatever we can, then we forget this place.
ok! she was excited and she changed back into her blue pajamas while i was outside,
remembering more cigarettes, a torchlight, three more keys and a bottle of old wine for the night.
and a gun. we needed a gun in case.

Most of the windows were gone, together with the second storey of the house. it wouldnt be
raining so it was ok for the ceiling to be gone like that. by the time i returned to the room she
was fast asleep, a sweet angel, too old to be going through all of this. i sat in an old wooden
chair beneath the window, next to the bed. she had stopped breathing so that i could smoke and
she could sleep deeper. it was harder to treat time when it had stopped, and no way to catch
95

the movement of hours or days when the sun was brighter on the other side, and winter pale over
here. no use trying to keep a tab on things too much. i just clocked the gun, and smoked,
mindlessly. thinking.keeping the images alive. a little at a time, we remember, dont have to
overcrowd the head with memories and foresight. we remember what we must, we protect who
we must. i just sat there, sleep gone from emotion and heartbeat. a narrative unfolds within,
reports of the static returning in an almost dead head. broadcasts lost but finding its way back
through the many routes and it looks for gateways like me, who had long held night dear, to
things of paradise and of dream. the waveforms move through the deeper of night when children
like her sleep. while it lulls her to not yet places, it stretches me, the points of flash moment and of
eras, bringing me across to those doomsday times of the wars, beeping noises, air raid sirens. its
a frightening stomp, the running soldiers, the war machine churning. a break in transmission. the
girl is dreaming, a saviour like dream and it cuts away the home i find amidst the warring cities,
the age old tanks, metallic death. i latch on to her dreaming, getting a feel but not intervening or
even watching. this dream is for her alone, ushering her to safer places. i hear the static returning,
a broadcast flickering only in the direction of up. see only when you look to the skies, above, the
screens come on alive in black and white light static. transmission of older films and lives, largely
lives, forgotten lives. she stirs in her sleep and i hold my breath. my thoughts alone swim too fast
with her tide; i ease off, let the child sleep. i still hold the gun in my hand, day is no where now.
day will not come. a few more hours, let her sleep. ;et her sleep. i try not to think, moving out of
the room for a while, out of the door to the main step of the house. I look outward, more spaces
have gone since i last looked. the satellites will come soon. to interpret what it recalls.
i didnt think it would be her. i had seen her before in the books, mostly sketches, rarely a
detailed encounter or descriptor. no one could place her name or any age. hours before my
professor had died, he said he could almost see the nature of her parents, their blood histories
and alternate futures but never their names or faces. i was never obsessed with her, the way
others were and that was why she had come with me. when youre too close to it, you dont see it
for what it is. that was how she explained it to me, hours after the world had forgotten. but what
she was, was never revealed, i was to be with her, the last two. that was all. several hours had
passed i think, the night never changing anymore but the space around the house turning faster
into the black. ocasisonally a building would be remembered, and its remnants would return. an
arch of pillar, hallway or room, or chimney and windows. the bell tower of the old church had
remained while everything else was forgotten. an hour or so before the girl woke, i saw through
the window the first flash in the skies, followed by the rumble. it was colder butthere was more
movement in the air, as if in replacement of what was forgotten, an aura of discovery had
fashioned itself in the places of void. not an exciting newness, nor alien, but like a flashback, the
rising sensations of a terminal time drug. she started humming in her sleep, just as the flashes got
more regular, slowly she was returning, drawing her first breath, the first twitch of her finger. i
leaned over her, hey...you up?
she groaned a little then turned to her side; speaking into the pillow, its always never far
enough. i thought she was talking in her sleep, whats never far? i asked. keeping an eye on
the window.
sleeping. its sleeping is never far enough. it carries so much with it. so much.
i didnt want to wake her but i had to.
i have to bring you to an end. get up, come on, you can tell me about sleeping never far enough
later.
96

not sleeping never far enough Jester, its sleeping is never far enough. we cant cross if its
sleeping is always so near. she pushes herself up and off the bed. i want some milk.
she had lost me. i just sat there looking at her half awake eyes.
the sudden crack of thunder made her scream a little while i ducked for no real reason. then i
heard the sirens.

she panicked, jumped into bed, under the covers and starting telling herself to sleep.
i clocked my gun. honey stay awake! we cant stay here!

sleep!, they will forget us when we sleep!
no.,no, they know were here. lets go.

that terrible sense of dread fills me, the burden of life, keeping alive, weighs down on me like
deadweight. i become slower, my mind reels into absurdity.
i lose control.
i crave for the drugs to get me through but i know all that is over. its raw now, the mind, the body
the spirit. no more alleviation, no more elevation. we had to live. i took the girl by her hand and
we moved quickly to the back exit, through the house with no other floor, no ceiling and absent
walls. the sirens were getting louder. a shrill screaming like banshees out for a kill. she sees the
red lights flashing from far away at the hills. she realizes the buildings are forgotten. sleep.
drugs.escape. blankness. all the things that we want chases us, lures us into its desperate corner.
my body feels tense, like it will burst, or implode. pictures of broiling blood fill my mind. we are
running through the open fields of black floor and black above. the air thins, we thin with it but
slowly, translucent skin showing through our forgetting clothes. we dash to the side, eyes
scrambling at least for a rocky road. i stop running, breath leaving me in heaves. i aim the gun
toward the general direction of the sirens and fire. three maybe four shots streak across night,
red tracers hunting red lights. a silver red bullet takes out one of the sirens. shatter spin. red
shards of light. the other few bullets stray endlessly into oblivions.

they fire back.

here here! she shouts at me pointing to the dirt road. a small relief floods me as my feet hits
bare gravel. we run, i pick up a couple of rocks as we pass them. she runs ahead of me, following
PAUL 9/9/08 12:07 AM
Comment: GUN
97

the soil and the lightning in the distance. everything appears to happening in great distances,
away from us, yet the thing that chases us seem closer, and the thing we seek seem further.
more gun shots.
i swerve left and right and keep going; my eye on the little girl in front of me.
gun shots.
i could feel them whir past.
remember the words! i force myself, think! between bursts of breath, THINK!
The words hit me like a train, i throw the rock foward, ahead of the girl
i mutter the words.

the rock shatters the black space beyond. she abruptly stops running, long enough for me to reach
her, just before she screams, to take her and cross over

to the other side.
__

the satellite watches. it follows, it observes.
a great distance below, the people watch the skies. they have waited. they now see and read the
signs.
they stare at me, and do not recognize a thing. i am uncomfortable lying down on this patch of
space but the moon sets low tonight. if i turn, they shall be no light.
they never really knew what had happened during the conference. it seems so long ago now. so
distant.
they crowd around the body in the sand. a storm wind is blowing in from the north. a red
sprawling atmosphere recedes into the black of the western skies. there is blood in the blue sands
but it does not come form the body of this dead shaman. it comes from the root of this entire
space.

mindspace is wounded. bleeding. purging.
its prince has stopped traveling. cold, half buried, no staff. unexpected perhaps.
PAUL 9/9/08 12:07 AM
Comment: Shaman-mindspace
98

there were many things he had intended to do but in the end it is like this. no one would think that
it would be her.
her last stop was AIRA, the healing oceans. the little girl had listened to the stories from AIRA
herself, she too a little girl but she had not seen her man come her way. no.

he didnt come looking for healing. she understood that now standing over him, then kneeling. she
did not shed a tear for it was murder somewhere else to cry.

years ago as she held his bloodied hand in that bloodied desert, she told him she was sorry that
she wasnt there, near the sun to watch him coming. by then, his mind had been lost with the
hundred or so followers who were massacred along him. they died with his words on their lips and
this little girl was sorry. he shifted his dying visions from them to her and to them, especially the
young mothers and babes in arms who were now one, with sand and blood. overhanging skies.
her hand was in his and she long had forgiven him. they, who follow the blind, also do not see.

his death here was the first conviction. the lapse of truthfulness in words of believe. the heart in it,
also lies. and the law returns, dearly, those who have to pay.
the people had received back their witch doctors and medicine men, by the time the other night
had come. with their healers came the news of one doctor who had not returned and shall not. He
who is half buried in the sand of blood and mud.

there were whispers about the girl, and candles had come to be, lighted at windowsills of night
sleep, an open window and invitation to her wandering spirit.

no one knew it was for her, the winter those nights. the shivering, has fallen, torrential,outrunning.
the city hides behind the shelters as the storm passes through, torrential, testifying. all the first
ones, marked again in history by the shapes of doors on their skin. doors opening. transcending
those of the satellites.
it is said that the blue desert know those who travel her. she listens but does not speak. the sands
shift from under the feet of those who stand above the body of the dead crosser, and they are
taken back to their places. it is said that this blue desert protects the people who walk through her,
and she watches over their dead. the people read the signs and hold no thought of returning. the
sands will keep him there and also take him where he needs to be. in the sand the small footprints
also fade. swathes of pink glimmer through the alien landscapes. the eastern wind brings the
shape of footprints elsewhere/ to the doorstep of others.
__
PAUL 9/9/08 12:07 AM
Comment: Little girl
99

the train man shall listen to the voice that cometh unto him.

there is a first born who lives in the blue-light valley of the trains. from a young age he knew that
when the fog comes, so do the trains; and from a young age, he had watched his father talk to
the trainman.
In camouflage overalls he spoke over cigarettes with microphones turned off. There is no middle
ground, he says, you either self-destruct or attain enlightenment.
Such an extreme memory of such a day in the white room.
In the other colored rooms, different eras talk at once. The green room sits the elders with the
young venturers. The blue room sees those who rest in front of screens from screens that eat their
eyes; and the other room is where the dream makers are. Enter that room and find the many
windows, blinking open and close, shuttered and tinted. We look out and see that
The city is being rebuilt, as the mass people relay under the ground, bound in the spells of turning sleep
and passing images from the lives they last had or, for some, lives they shall eventually lead. Here the
superheroes turn in their costumes before they had seen its flash of colors. They trade their gifts of power
for more hours of sleep, as the city is being rebuilt. The churches torn down, the feet of the walkers turn
cold and fuzzy, lke a wave of electro sensation runing up and down the spines of those who sleep. A
resonant voice waves through the chambers of the unmoving; reciting scripture and confessions from vast
politico minds and pseudo christs. The buddha sits. as the voice waves through the terranean scapes and
tunnles of obscene light. a resonant bassline creeps from the magma and the hollow cities in the earth but
all who are here sleep the long sleep, preserving the memory and charm of the life now in metamorphose.
Above, the city scales its own walls, the blue prints like a codex of myths, reforming into zones and levels
and alleys. The cycles of many lives spiral upward into cinematic future sky, a screening of possible storms
and auroras splashing color and form and light across vast empty space. Empty of life through the faulty
lens we peer through, seeing nothing because the eye does not fit nor comprehend the forms that are
already there, from another plane of reality.

The constructing people move through the endless night. Beyond this dark facade, the sun cools like a
dead ball suspended in a shifting universe. a different population roam the surfaces of the exhausted star,
allowing their memories of the bright to sink into the heart of cold mother, wishing to wake this mammoth,
for all things die in her sleep. the names of her many children are recited, almost invoked and the swim of
memoriam fills her void of great father who has left.

the walking grounds of the city in building is like throb of winter under a silent skin. boots crunch of ice
formations, the soil turning darker with memory of blood. Like a pack of wild dogs, the watch doctors trail
across the wastelands, scouring and scavenging the ramnants of memory from earths dead disciples. Half-
buried in the mud and ashes are the lost books from libraries torn and discarded. plastic toys melt into the
road and the trees are long dead in winter save the ornaments that glitter hang from festive strands of
past. Nachtman von arzt is consumed by the force of nostalgia, vaguelt recalling the etheral face of his
mother as she merged with the sun in her dying light. his father witnessed her ascension with bursts of
anger and fire; his ponds and valleys quaking with his unreasoned song. in all of abandonment, Von arzt
severed the current cycle and was reinvented in the wake of the sun going cold. at his own funeral, the
100

nocturnalis gathered about his casket to write the opening and end chapters on his pale blue skin. deep
black inscriptions to bind and release the night-time voices. the whispering rose with the light of his
breathing mind and the casket was abolished. He awoke again , with heart in pine and his father, a
holocaust for the histories he so discerned and disdained. Dejecting the offer to trail his father to the
apocalypt camp, N.V.A scarred his abdomen and temple with the oculus of deepening shadow, to watch
the night as the city he adorns is reinvented.

__
The people had heard their ghost-counsels speak of he who traveled and never returned and the
people called for a shrine to rise, and to mark the girl who had followed him. The secretary
paused. Scanned the scripture. They want to invoke him to the next returning, Back into the
objects, the fetish form. Return him to the cult her birthd and ate. She paused again. Stared into
the grey bricked skies & generals flags. Condoning the military supreme; unsure of her
surroundings. He has other temples, thought to have burned in the last earth. Also, surrogate lives,
one of which seem to have inspired parts and streaks in ours. She puts out a deck of cards,
foreign symbolism on each face in this state but nonetheless, always striking out. A red and black
card. Overlay another, across, in spatial freedom. two calling cards. continued the secretary
to the generals tower, have never heard of the other one before. A chemical creature of key
and time it feels. Both have numbers. We can call him. Call them both. Bring him back into his
shrine.

The ancestrals,. The generals echoed, from bricks of old, towerium bold and grey, The bell
tolls for the congregation. Our blood has a muse for him. He will grow old and to be fifty. He will
remember the chapel where he was slained before, when he ate of the flesh and blood.of
kings .He knows us Miss D, and the smell of your wounds. You are but a sweet little girl.
And the towers enclosed her, mid-scream.
And the bells, tolled for the congregation.
__







PAUL 9/9/08 12:07 AM
Comment: Little girl
101



The field hands had stacked up the cars to burn them
Sending heat to the upper buildings for its breathing and copulation.
The memory of forests expands between the city streets.
The canopy throws the slums in shadow, neon entrances to black locked doors. Faint smells of
vomit and sweat and whiskey thumping faintly through the walls with t he sound and the rock.
The lamp posts utter in orange night, a blur myopia, a stigma, an volition sight.
Fighting with the vines for precious light
The world cannot decide what is night and day
The universe contracts in recollecting
the coma-girl who had wept astray.
wide asleep in one of the houses
In that block of flats;
The human-cage of surrealisme and goliath.
During the time when the giants had walked
Seen and awed among the skies.
Unlike now in this silent era, when the humans had been too blind for their buildings and not those
of the shadows in the sky, towering from our fertile land in our likeness but not being.
Rising above, blockd, pigeon holed, inside the broiling room, not understood by the computing
grounds.
The coma-girl unmoves upon her bed and by the bed of infinite D.
Timeless eternal she;
Stroking the face of the girl who dreams of a white block of flats in star lighted canvas white
Orion, all points of blur, thrice as seen by the human eye and she looks up for maps and
directions home
But like the static falsity of the twisted streets that twist and turn into each others dead end offers
her no remorse or mercy for those who are lost and bear her name.
102

She walks, barefoot, into wet concrete and rain on gravel - blood on sand.
She stops to cry for her master and father.
She stops to cry and does not wake.
Asleep by the bed of most divined D
Lost in chemical sleep; beneath the ravens wing of intrusion.
Chains.

A boy writhes in sleep; an old man writhes with the worm in his gut
Eld the sorcerer returns to his shivering daughter, who carries, faintly, the heads of his glorious
messiahs.
The forest is thinning out

Ai-FI crash. Fertility. Blue sand dunes. Mindspace recovers from a window burned in her scalp. The
satellite crashes, broken left wing, stigmatized right eye, a bleeding cross in its side; exo-skeleton
half-buried, bleeding. A hum, natural, surrounding, comes from a blue child, a salty wind in her
hair, oceans frictions in her eyes, and vastness, vastness her small hands hold.
Sun rising, turning the blue a darker hue, like evening crossing into an overcast morning.
She lullabies the birdlings, pricked and hungry in their nests
As the flight of the birds call across an echoed state.
Reverberations in chamber city, hollowed out, vacant.
A smell mixture of food, cooking wafts through the air
The air excused of haze and smoke; through the smoke where scripture is sought
And shamans are found dying.

Ai-Fi crash. Abortion.
Severed constituency. A people parted but in awe of the fracture between states. Oh most holy
ground of the mountainous chapter; recall us, our children and our dire home; offer us respite in
our renovated stations in life, within this blue earth and her outside darkness. Six eyed ORION,
look down upon us with your scepterd sight and bring us thy retina for our heavenly food.
103

Ai-Fi clearance team report.

Crash site.

7:26am.
The Templic mind has forgotten. Organic theft or abandonment un-certaind. Requesting historical
analysis. Preferred investigator, Arzt. Neumaan. Von. Second Half-light of Nachtman. Awaiting
next emotive action.

Endsong

Howlongbeforeigetin?beforeitstartsbeforeIbegin?coldplay.

Thesatellitewatches.
104

Fallengrain.Astrangephenomenaoccurring.Atthisendlinethatneverends.

Wherearewe?

Thebeginningorend?Thissongofvacantspace,seedsofallouroffspring,imaginationswillbring
forthwiththemultitudes.

105

Andwebeginagain

106

VIRILIiUM

Movement2

107

108

Abortion of The book


of saul

109

110

strangenightsonthismondaymorning
asislowlyswimbackintoreality
whenmyvirusisover
mydiseaseatrest.
ibindthemonsters
andgreettheforeignlands
iscreaminmusicinmymind
silentthroughoutthistempleroom
icontemplatefredrick
theindoorsmusician.
icontemplatepasttakings
thechangingofhandsandseasons
cultsandhighpriests.
ihavecontemplatedtheinshoresofheall
wherethefallenkingsroam.
ihavecontemplatedsatellitesandthenon-becoming.
ihavethoughtofyouandyouarrived.
ihavedreamtofyouandyouhadcalled
ihavelongedforyou
butyou
almostforgotten...
alwaysthere
111

butyou...

painkillers
salbutamol
petmedicine
thingstodistracttheangerofthebody
theopenshore
theemptyship
thisisolatedartlife.
whereisthewrit?
whereistheprophecy?
whendoesthebuildingofthetomebegin?
howmanypasts
andhowmanyfutures
howmanynames
andhowhowmanyfailures?
howmuchnumbness
howmuchshivers
whereartthywormthateathethyouwithin?
whereartthoulordredwhosailsthenazereth?
whereartyourvoice
amongthesemanyvoicings?

buttowhom
amispeakingto
112

whenthere'snothingthereintheend?
whatthen?
wheni'mnothingbutamyth?

St,thecruxifei
1

October31
st
.2006.
Jacoblore.

Inmyvisions,iwasbeforethebloodiedfaceofChrist,thecrucifiedlord.Ispatathimwithtears
inmyeyes,andwalkedaway.saint,thecrucifeicamethevoiceafterme.Ididntheeditscall
Andnow,withmymindlostinthistraincabin,headingforaliensoil,50,000milesaway,Ifeel
thepaincomingbacktomydampenedspirit.Theopiateshadtocomenext.Straightintothe
bloodstream,throughtheneedleseye;maskingthemindfromtheangerofthebody.A
desperatepoisontocalmthedirestorminside.Ilightupanothercigarette,coolmenthol
swirlingtoeasetheburninglung.Ishootupthecrystalclearliquide.Iliedownagain.Thefever
hadfinallyleftme,thesweatinghavestopped,thevisions,nowjustvaguememories,flashnow
andthen,liketheghostaccuserofmyirresponsiblefate.HoursaftermylastvisionofChrist,I
tookacoldshowertoturndowntheheatandunderthespelloftheicedwater,Iwantedtokill
myself.

Howdiditenduplikethis?
HowlonghaveIbeenlyinghere,onthespoiledbed,driftinginandoutofbarbituratesleep,
dreamingopiumdreams?HowlonghaveIbeenwaiting,likeawoundedsteed,fordeepnight
andcalmpsychedelicstotakeoverthismindandbody?Igropeinthedark,reachingoutfor
myglassofwhiskey.Idraintheglass,thealcoholburningmyinsides.Ireachbeyondthe
syringesandnutstopicktwomorepillsoffthetable.Nightmareblueandshutdownwhite.A
113

secondglassofwhiskeywashesthemdown.JustwhatIneeded.Astrongerconcoction,tokeep
thewolvesatbay.

Thereisaspacewherethedeeporangelightskeepthewinterfromoursafehavens.

thereisspacebetweentheyellowlines.

Ifindmyselflostonthetraininmyvoice,orwasitanothers?Gatheringstrengthforthehail
stormsahead.Iseeawomaninthedistance.Adistance.Adistance.

Imshivering.Nakedandsacrificedtomemoryandprophecy.ShiveringindireNovember,
waitingforthistraintoend.

Iseeherlikeafrozenimage.
who?
thegirl.Barren.Eternal.Iconic.Sheholdsaglassofabsinthinherlefthand.
Igetlostintheeyeofherstorm,whereallwascalm,suspended,dreamedof.
youliveinatarotdeck.
no.Isaid.itsthedeckofsaul.
Myspineshiverswiththatname.magicpassesthrough.Thendread,panic,oblivion.
Istruggle,becauseitisntIwhospeaks.Thevoiceisalien.Myvoiceisalien.Shestandsbefore
me.blackdress,thickandlongdreadlockedhairthatisgreyedandblack,streakedelectric
blueandredandpurple.
adark,richblendofwitchcraftandfantasy,eroticaandinnocence.Virginandwitch.Thechild,
thegoddess.

114

Inherotherhandshebeheldadeckofcards.
Theuniversebeckonsmymoves.
Shecallstome
Motherofidols.Thegypsyqueen,burningwood.

Herbeautychangeswiththefrequenciesofthemind

Isnapoutofit.Theseaofbarbituratesleep.Imsweatingoutthechemicals,theintoxicants.
Iminaheadymixtureofdreamandmalformedthoughts.Iseeimagesandcards.

Thedeckofsaulwhatkindofvoicewouldspeaksuchnames?Whyatthishour?Whyinthis
month?Onthistrain?Mysoulshudders,notinanyevilsense,butitshudderswiththe
knowledgethatchangeiscoming.Strangevibrationscreepupmyspine.Tremblingwiththis
trainspeedingtotheglasscity.

2
November1
st
,2006.
DetectivemadMonroe.

Themotherisbeautiful.Lyingtherenaked.slashedup.butbeautiful.Icouldseethesoftfolds
ofherhair,thepartsnotsoiledwithherblood.Icouldseeshewasyoung.Maybemidthirties.
ButWhereisthechild?Whereisthechild?Ihearhercrying,butshesnothere
detective.
Weallknowwherethefatheris.Shriveledand
detective!
Ireturntotheroomfrommythoughts.Thenervousuniformedofficercallingmeseems
startled.
115

somethingshappeningtothewater..inthebathtub.
Ithinkhe;sabouttopuke.Irushintothetoiletinthissmall2roomapartment.Inthebathtub,
inanuprightfetalposition,thedeadhusbandisnakedandshriveled.Skinblue,internalorgans
turnedtoslushandpouringoutofhisanus.Headtwisted,Mouthagape,Histoungehangsout
purple,hiseyeshalfrolledupintohishead.Thebloodiedwateraroundhimappearstobe
boilingslightly,withwhitemistsrising.Butitsmellsfunny.Notthesmellofbloodanddamp
decay.itsthechemical.Thepoisonitseems,thatkilledthisman.
everybodyout.
Ineededtobealone.
Idugmypocketforthebottleofsand.
Theofficersstumbledoutonebyone.Ishutandlockthedoor.
Iopenmybottleofblacksandthenaroundmeandthebodyinthebathtub,Ipouroutand
formacircle.whatdarkbeastwouldusesuchpotions?Iqueried.
lastarfba,noshbishnu.Iinvoked.
Theairaroundmecrackledwithdisturbance.
Myspiritgimpappears.

SmellthesournessofthismurderIcallouttoit.
Itforms,asmall14yearoldfiguretrappedinblackleatherandpvc,climbingthewalllikean
insect.Sheswearingafullheadharnesswithtubesrunningoutofhernose.Thetubesmove
likesnakes,takingintheair.
findmethemakerofthismadnessItellit.
Ithinkofthegirl.Whereisthegirl?
Ilookaroundthetoilet.Iseealaundrybasket.
Idigthroughtheusedclothesasthegimponthewallwatchesmethroughblindfoldedeyes.
Ifishoutapairofthegirlscottonpanties.Idangleitclosertothegimp.Thetubessnake
towardsthegarment.
116

findmethisgirl.Icommandit.
thenkillthebastardthatsgother.
vanoshlubriharyeh.
Ireleaseit.
Ineedtovomit.
ibreakthecircle,rushoutoftheroomfilledwithwaitingcops,dashacrossthestreetandtoa
metaldustbin.Ipukeupalltheblood,sacrificedforthishunting.Mystomachemptiesout,butI
stillpurge.Themusclesinmyguttwistsandpulls.
Afteralltheseyears,thesicknessstillhitsmehardafterinvokingthegimp.Afteralltheseyears,
mysoulstillturnsintoawilddisturbancewhenshespresent.
Moremundanecopsrunouttome.areyouallrightallyouallrighttheymakesomuchgod
damnnoise.
donttouchme~!Iwarnthem.Myheadstillspins.
Monroe!Yousonofabitch,whatthefuckareyoudoinghere?
fuckingf.b.iprick.Hejabberson.
arkashisOURsuspectandthelasttimeIchecked,wedidntneedamumbojumbobastard
psychicforourcase.
Inthehouse,thephonerings.
TheAgentbabbleson,shoutingatmelikemaniac.Itsallashowfortheboysinbluearoundus.
Inside,he;sterrifiedofme.heknowswhoIam.heknowswhatIdo.
Anofficercallsouttomefromthehouse.
thegirl!Shesaliveandonthephone.Weretappingthelinerightnowtofindher.
Isuddenlyvomitagain.Thistime,makingsureIcaughtsomebileontheagentsshoe.
Hecurses.Idonothearhim.
Ifeelthegimpmanifestingitselftothekiller.Shesgoingformykill.
Officersrunoutthehouse.Urgency,panic.wevegotanaddress.Againstthehurtinmy
bones,Irushtothecruiser,sirensalreadyblaringforthego.Itrytosteadymypainaswerush
117

tothescene.Itrytofindasafehaveninside.Isensethegirl,terrified.Isensethekillerandhis
ghastlysuffering.
Thenthegimpmakesitskill.

November5
th
.2006.
DoctorImmanuelGrant.

Theskeletonoftheintellectualisstillintact.Spreadoutonthefloorbeforetheburntout
cupboards.Thisroom,thissanctuary,tremblesundertheweightoftheruptures.Thebroken
wallsshiverwiththeknowledgeofopengatewayswhilethefaceoftheworldcracksinthe
presenceofthatwhichhascomethrough.Almostayearsincetheblackholehadconsumed
itselfanditgetsharderandharderwatchingthesegates.Themanybooks,strainingtheold
woundedbookcaseundertheirweight,islosingmoreandmorewordstotheforgetting.
Withouttheirmaster,thebooksforgetthemselves,thepowertheycontain,lessensand
eventuallythetextswillbegoneforever,sacrificedunderthebladeofblankpages.EvenifI
couldbringSaulback,hissourceofpowerwillgone.Stolenfromhimbythedyingofmemory.
Howthen,wouldhebindwhathehathlooseduponthisearth?

Scatteredaroundtheroom,therearedifferentspeciesoftheprayingmantis.Thissacredfamily
ofinsectsismysourceofpower.Theyallowmetodiscernthefuture,thepresent,thepast.
Theyallowmeaccesstoworldsotherthanmyown,theyallowmecommunicationwiththe
deadandfutureshamans,theonceandeverelders,namelessracesandplanetminds.Theyare
118

warlikeatthegates,onguardandwatchful.Forminganinfrastructure,toprotectandholdthis
placeofportalsup.Thisabandonedtempleandpathwaystotheotherplaces

4
Thedrugsmith.

For I am the sign of the snake, I peel the dead skin from the soles of my feet.
The incense in the room smokes and burns as the living books upon the altar watches
me. It watches me remember the life of other peoples, other beings, other sages.

I am not a monster, for I did not desecrate the prostitute. But I have seen other dreadful
things inside. Among the many masters lay the dire states, the ghastly families, the
abominable Book of R. I have seen, I have conquered, but only the battles have been
won. I am not a monster but I have kissed the wound of the whore.

I am not an addict. For I have seen the anger of the body with naked minds.
I return, knowing that my eyes have changed and the mind is raw but the flesh remains
a prison. My body can only go so far but my addiction will take me further. Remember
this. I am not an addict but the drug itself.

I am not a whore. I take the weight of the world into me and give birth to new life. I
touch you as the hand of God would touch you. I change so that you can be the
119

master but you change as you become a slave. I make the snakes in your spine shiver
but I am not a whore, for I hold the tongue of other ecstasies and have healed the soul
of a sage.

I am not a poet. Though I bring to light the other places, allow your inner sight unto
realms fantastic, you realize only a fracture of my mind.. I am not a poet but the voice
of another god.


5
November7
th
2006
Thewanderingman.

ShewasaprostituteintheglasscityforthreedayswhenImether.Shedidntliketheworkbut
themoneywasgood.Shehadthesignofthesunonherstomach,rayswavingoutfromablack
hole.ShedidntknowmuchEnglish,forshewasfromtheeasterncities,butsheknewthe
wordssexandmusic.Shewascleanandsmelledofcheapsoap.Shewasgentlewithhertouch.
Ihadherbathemeinthewaters.Acleansing,ablessing.Sheletmelaywithher.Sheletme
kissherthighs.sheletmelookather.sheletmetouchher.timemeltedbeneathayellow
weight.whydoyoucomehere?sheasks.Icouldntanswer.

Whenthetimewasup,Ileftthegrotto,walkingintherain,thestrangeorangeglowfromthe
streetlampswashingoutthecolorsfromthefacesofthepimpsastheygatherandwaitfor
business.Ikeepwalking,pasttheneonaltarsalightonthehotelbuildings,whereontheroad,
strangeoldmencomeuptome,offeringmoreglimpsesintotheotherside.Ipolitelydecline.I
keepwalking,tryingtofindacertaindarknessinside.Blanksafetyfromthefailureofmyreality.

Shewasaprostitutefor3daysintheglasscitybeforeIdestroyeditbyforgetting.Another
memory,anotherre-runinthisdeadworldthathasntforgettenitselfbecausepartofitselfwas
inme.andIwasntdead.
120

Ilookuponthetangledmessofthecityandfindnomoremeaningbecausethereisnooneleft.
TheyhaveerasedeverythingfrommeandivetakeneverythingIcanfromthem.

Ihavebroughthertotheotherside,andnow,whateverlandisleftbeneathmyfeetwillbe
theirlastmemoryastheycomerushingfromtheirforgottenhighwaystotakemeawaywith
them.TheyforgetthatIwillforget.Theslipofthemonstersmindwillmeantheirdeath.

11/11/12
contact.

Satelliteai-fi.Offplanetaryconsciousness.

WhencommanderdangerjohnHawkewasaman,thenebuloreanshadtakenhimandturnedhiminto
ashaman-god-kingbythesurnamelore.
Whenthetemple-satelliteai-fitookLorefromthebrinkofhisowndeath,wildernessandisolation,it
turnedhimintoasaulLieradufontaine.Nearlyayearago,saullierabecametoopowerful,toofast,
whenhediscoveredhisabilitytomanifestfamiliars.HefirstcreatedtheREDChrist,thentheREDman,
thenrecalledai-fiunderhiscontrolthenturnedhimselfintoablackholetoaverttheinevitableRED
IDOLfromreturningtoitsplaceofrest;theglasscity.Saulsformofmagicdidaverttheidolfromtaking
overthecountryspsyscheandcollectiveconsciousnessbuthisactionsalsodidcauserupturesintime
space.Hissanctuaryturnedintoaportalthathadfiveruptureddoorsinthem.Thefivedoorsopened
ourrealitytoGRHG,NEPTU,D,OUTHR,100.100.THEFIVENAMES.THEFIVEPASSAGES.

Saul,theshamanislost.
Hewhohathloosedthingsuponthisearthisinacoma.Hismindisnowheretobefound.Hehas
enteredtheduaastates.
121

Disconttec.

7
thisnight,
shehadcometowatchme
fromacrosstheroad
sheknowsIambleeding.
Thegrassbytheedgeofthewhitewallthatismyborder
Iswetfrombloodandsheknowsitbytaste.
Shecanhearthegirls
Sobbing
Cackling.
Cooing.
ButSheisnotafraidofme.
Ilieinacomastateinsidetheabandonedschool
Andshewaits,outside,across,on
Thisdarknight,formetowake

doctorimmanuelgrant

Nighthasfallenupontheneighborhoodbythesea,setintheeast,a20minutehighwaydrivetothe
glasscity.Here,awayfromtheglareoftheholidaylights,thebustleofthecity,Ioverlookatroubledsea
122

onthiscolddireNovembernight.Aterrorhaspassedoutsidethisislandandinanothercity,atraveler
passesthrough,apilgrimwhohaslosthisprivategod.Theyhavebothseenthesignofthestarrising
andhavebothsoughtthepathtotheglasscity.Ithastakenthem,amongseveralothers,almostayear
toreachthispointoftheirjourneysandthisNovember,likethelast,willbelikenoother.

beyondthisdireNovember,thestarwillappearagain,asportent,asomen,assign.Itsinevitablerising
fromnowherehassettwomagisintopilgrimagemotion.TheonceintercessionistChristianmysticbut
nowlostprophetJacobLoreandthederangedanddarklydivinepolicepsychic,detectivemadMonroe.

ThewhitefoxandImmanuelgrantvisitsthehouseofwu.

Junkieboymeetsdeluciaoutsidethetombofsaul.Theoldschool.

123

Grantandmonroediscussesthedropintothedeathduaastateofjohnhawke.

ImmanuelandJacobloregoinsearchoftheredChrist.

Junkieboyanddeluciabringsbackdrashadandmarian.

Marianprepareshotelresurrectioncrisis.
Delucialooksafterthecomagirlwiththewhitefox.

Immanuelgrant,Jacoblore,madmonroe,drashad,andthejunkieboyenters1000.100tobringsaul
backthroughthesanctuary.

November14
th
2006.

JacobLore

Likeasoberanimal,Icrawltowardsreality.Thistrainstoppeddeadcoldhoursago,thekindly
trainmasterallowingmetogathermyselfandmythingsinthetimethatIneeded,aslongasIdidit
beforethenextsunrise.Allthedrink,allthepills,allthedrugsweregone.Consumedorstolen,Inow
longercared.Therewasgroundtobestoodon,anditwastimethatIfoundmywayintotheglasscity.
Twoweekshadbeentoolongatimeformyarrival,evenmyheavybrokenmindknewthat,but
somethinginsidethismesstookcomfortthatthatwasthetimeneededformetobereadytosetafoot
onthismythicplace.Icannotkeepmymindfromthegirl.Thatopiatedrivenfantasywheresheshowed
methecards.IhaveforgottenmostabouttheiconsandimagesIhadseenbutIcannotforgether.I
stumbleoffthetrainandfindthesilenceofnightamidsprawlingsheltersandemptybenches.Dead
trains,havingarrivedhometoresttillthenextsuncomesagain.Mymindfeelslucidbutweary,thecold
iscomforting.Isensetheweightofmybackpackwithme.Isensethedullthroboftheredcandleinits
velvetbox.Isensethepictureframeofmyfamily,alongsidemymothersfinallettertome.Isenseall
124

thesethingsofmypastbuticannotsensethelord.TheChrist.Onwhomindreamsandindim
recollections,Ispitonandthrowinsultswithaweightinmyheart.Iroamtheemptyquartersofthis
trainstationtryingtofindsomesenseofspaceandtime.ItsnearingthemiddleofdireNovember,
aroundmeIseenothingbutfieldsandhills.Inthedistance,therearetinylightsmovinglikeinsects,the
windblowsachillthroughmywornclothes.Itrytofindsomesignoflife.Ikeepwalking,anaimless
soldier,awanderingronin.howhavemythoughtsrecollectedintothispool?Whyrefermyselftosuch
shapesandformsandroles?WhosewardoIfightnowthatthelastonehasbeenabandoned?Likea
nomad,Iwalktotheendofthelineandbegintohearthewhirandclickofacamera.Ihavewalked
alongtheraillines,aheadofmeinsteadofbackandfindmyselfinthegrowingwildernessoftallgrass
andsuddenrocks.ItishereamongthisdrynighttimelandsthatIseehim.AtallanddarkIndianman
withsilverdhair,dressedinawhitebeatlestshirttakingphotographsinthedark.Hespeaksinaslurred
druggedvoicesometimesyoucancapturethelightoffthecobraseyesthosethatstandguardbythe
bordersofthesestationshekeepsclikingtheSLR.theserpentisdepictedasthedevilinbiblical
mythologydoesitnot?heaskedme.itmayhavebeenarhetoricalquestion.thesnakeisalsowisdom,
sheisalsotheuniverse,theouroboros,thedamnedandcurledgutofgrahegmyspineshiverswith
thatname.ablasphemysinksinme,nauseatesme,.hestopstakingphotographs.comeonImay
havespokentoomuch.
Ifollowhiminsilence.Treadingfurtherandfurtherintothewildthensuddenlyturningontoadirtpath.
Inthedarkgrassontheleftandtheright,IthoughtIcouldhearthesoundofsnakes,slitheringinthe
distanceandfollowingthismanbeforeme.hecasuallylightsupajoint.ignorethesnakeshesaidas
heofferedmetherollup,theyrejustseeingmeoutItookafewdragsandthankedhim,passingit
back.Inthedistance,Iseeablackcar.Hefinisheshisjointbeforewegetin.hestartsthecarandsaid,
theglasscityisabout20minutesawaybythehighwaybutweretakingadifferentroute.:hedrives
ontoadirtroad.Weredroppingbytheneighbourhoodbythesea.

YoureoutsideyourChristianloreinthiscityjacob,notthatitdoesntexisthere,butthisplaceholds
morethanonemythology,sometakingreferencefromtheother,whileothersmakingorremakingitself
intosomethingelsealtogether.Here,therearemorethanjustvoicesandrevelationsandtheonlyman
whocanmanageallofthisisgone.

125

November3
rd
.2006.

DetectiveMonroe.

Inatightinterrogationroom,aseriesofpicturesislayedoutbeforemeonablanktable.Thefirstrowis
ofthehangedserialkiller.Bodyslashedtoshredsbyhisownhandclutchingthebrokenmirror.Hisface
distortedandpurpleandwhitewithfear.Hehadcutoffhisowngenitals,guttedhistongue,gorgedout
hiseyesballsandbrokehisownneckasheleaptofthetablegurglinginfearandexcrement.Allinfront
ofahysterical11yearoldgirl.Thesecondrowofpicturesdepictedthehusbandsbody,thegirlsfather,
shriveledandpoisonedbyastillunknownvenomandthelastfewpicturesshowedthebodyofhis
youngwife,raped,mutilated,slashed,burnt,sacrificed,ended;leavingherdaughterinthecurseof
beingtheonlysurvivingwitnesstoherownfamilysslaughter.

Intheroomwithmeisthecaptain.Shakenbytheeventsbutneverthelessrelievedthatthekilleris
dead.AreliefIwishIcouldgranthimforalongertime.itsnotgettingeasierchiefItrytoexplainto
him.moreandmorekillersarebeingawakenedbythismalevolentconsciousnessanditsturning
distraughtanddisturbedhumanbeingsintomonsters,toactoutitsextremeprimaldesires.Something
iswrongchiefanditsbeenhappeningforalmostayear,sincelastDecember.Thecrimesaregetting
moregrosteque,moreunexplainable.Allthecrimesthatsbeenhappeningawayfromthepubliceyeis
buildingintosomekindofheadanditshappeningoutsidethisjurisdiction.Ihavetoleavecaptain.Ifthis
meansturninginmynadgeandmygunbutIhavetoleavethiscityforanother.

Where?

theglasscity.

Thejunkieboydiaries.
126

71istheTowerofAfrioca.Wherethehallsonthe21
st
floor,areawashedwithadistantshore,anocean
ofworldsandcosmologies.Thesanctuaryisthesacredroom.Theunidoortomultiplace.Itisherewhere
Icontinuemysearchforhim.Forthelostsaul.Theloststar.IspentyearsunderthetutelageofSirVictor
Wagner,thefirstandforemostauthorityonthehistoricalgeographyofthisislandcitybutIamstill
unpreparedtocharttheunderwatersofthosehistoriesorthepsycheofthisplace..
____

thegreatancestorsopenedupadoorinthesky,andIcameuntothisplace,theglasscity.Everydayat
noonandagainatseven,amaninshadeswouldcometogivemeapacketofredcigarettesandsome
food.Fortherestofthetime,Iamlefttomillabouttheplaceandspeaktowhomeverwouldlisten.Iwas
askingalotofquestions,andmanypeoplechosenottohearmeout.Iwashere.Aloneinthisplace,
searchingfortheonetheycallsaul,butnooneseemstoappreciatemyinquiries.Thenoneevening,
afterithadrainedconsiderably,Iwasleftwithnocigarettesandthemaninshadeswasnowheretobe
found.Somethingelsehadtakenovermymind,akindofpanic,adisequilibrium.Itwasthen,thatImet
themusicman.Hekeptwatchingmeashesmoked,thismaninblack,anintellectualbythestyleof
glasseshewore,alittleofftangentwiththemainstreamwiththewayhisstrangebaldingheadofhair.
Themadscholar,thedazedandfantasticauthor.Igazedathimleisurelysmokinghiscigarette,staring
rightbackatmebutwithindifferenteyes.IcouldnotbearthesightofthecurlingsmokesoI
approachedhimandaskedifhemindedsparingmeastick.Myoldspiritrecognizedhiswhenhesaid
sureandofferedmehisthirdlaststick.Helititwithagreenlighter.Inmyheard,Iheardtheolddrums
ofmyancestrallands.HereisthemusicmagicianmanmyeldershadspokenaboutforIhadheardthe
songsofmyhomeinhispresence.Hespoketomesaying,sowhatsyourstory?Wheredoyoucome
from?somethingcompelledmetotellhim,soIspokemymindaboutfindingsaul,thegreatbutnow
lostshamanoftheglasscity.HealmostpausedhissmokingwhenIhadmentionedthename.thenhe
continued,insilentthought,contemplatingananswer.saulcannotbefound,hefinallysaid,onlyhe
canfindhiswaybackbuttheroadreturningisbroken.Ouronlyhopeistohelpfixit.thenthisiswhat
Imusthelpdohere,intheglasscity.Itoldhim.Heagreed.

Visionquestinto71todeterminescopeofuptureandofomensandwarnings.

Thepathstobemended.

127

1000/100.
Parts
1 - 10.

ONE

Thisisthehandthatbittheuntitledepic.anon

From which lunar sphere did the half-dream / half-delirium narrative of 1000/100 arrive, I do not
know. From astral geographic, I returned, I came running home (Bring me home to the dancehall
of the Gods) with the replica of a multi-angled book stored in my head. Sentences flooding the
channels of cognita, paragraphs like the poltergeist lifted my eyes, opened my ears to the sounds
and sight exploding from the subliminal streets of sleep. The Zebra in the night sky spoke to me,
told me this: The 100th chapter, is my life as a living document. This was three years ago.100.
The number appears again, adding another layer of meaning to the dream of 1000/100. The
dream was recent, and slowly as the number appeared according to the rhythm of its own
exposition, I come to learn of its existential weight. The 1000 was a mother-voice. A
hall/book/house/sign. In dream vision I saw the four walls, the ceiling, the floor, all a grey-white
tone. Of dullness, blankness, windowless, and without door, the hall formed a box for my
existence, a holding cell for my wandering night-soul. The dimensions of the room varied with
each breath (in dream I breathed, and in dream the hall breathed with me.) The 100 is the other
hour, other room, other chapter relative to the 1000. The movement of the nucleus (1000) altered
the 100 and the altered 100 gave pregnancy to the 1000. the 1000 was eternal as the 100 is
fragmentary. The presence of 1000/100 affects time, distorting it through its own lenses, causing
variety and spaciousness and the meter-gauge of events and happenings to collapse. 1000/100 is
a psychic/psyche puzzle, present in the wholly unconscious, the gestalt inner-spaces of mind and
humanity and life itself. It is the altar of the introvert; the temple of the neuronaut.
128


Days after that dream, I was in the bookstore, at the magazine rack, and the first physical
manifestation of 1000/100 appeared (remember that 1000/100 is an imprint of thought on
thought through thought). An established music magazine was reviewing 100 albums, and the
top 1000 songs from the collective realm of music. To purchase it was a necessary vindication. I
brought the magazine back with me and began searching for all those songs online. It was my
suspicion that each song had a hidden narration that would add to the meta-narrative of 1000/100.
The records, and CDs, cassette tapes and mp3s began piling up over the months that followed. I
started from the bottom of the list, working my way up. The songs didnt reach my ears in order.
I listened to whatever I got hold of first.

Music has always been a curious force to me. When I was a teenager, I remember feeling faint
and sickened, because there was only the street sounds, the vehicles going by, the chatter on the
street and no music. My blood was curdling up as I mounted the overhead bridge in a state of
semi-panic. My life was slipping from me as the cars slipped past with its electric whirr. I needed
the reverberations of music, any kind of music. Not the sounds of machines. I burst through the
sliding glass doors of the shopping centre, sweating and breathless, to capture the first waves of
music that came from the in-house system. My nerves calmed and pounding heart slowed as I
entered deeper into the mall, to the music console on the second level. The DJ was my dealer.
My messiah.



He thought I was crazy. I had told him to turn up the music or Id die. Many people think Im
crazy that way. It doesnt matter much what people think as long as you know what youre
thinking. My third voice taught me that, when I was 13. My third voice told me to pay attention
to the music. Through the music, I learned to hear the intended messages. I heard the stories
embedded between the notes, and then through the 1000
th
song, I heard the incurable dictation
lurking beneath that final frequency. My fourth voice had spoken (for the third voice begat the
fourth). It taught me things, about the devil. The devil happens It said, It happens as a
discordant sound, as a distraction first and never appearing. A sudden screech out in the streets
when you make the sign of the cross. A sudden rapping on the window by a salesman when
youre about to curse with truth. A cackle of birds in the morning when youre about to enter a
meditative state. A climatic fever, a small sudden cramp in your belly when youre thinking of
someone you love. The devil is also sometimes a smell.
129


Thesmellofpissfollowsmeeverywhere.Itsnotstainedonme;itsapresence,asenseofsmell
beingthemanifestationofapissdevil.Itthewaste.Thewasting.Thewastedthataccompaniesme.
Itsthesmellofpissintherain.Itmakesyoufeeldirty.

The devil is in the details. When youre aware of this, you lose your innocence but you win your
power and it can be a terrible thing. But to be unaware of it, you win through ignorance though
your glory is with price, like everything else. Its better to know. But wary of what you know
save you let it command you. That was the most the fourth voice had said and it doesnt speak
much anymore these days. With age, some voices vanish. With age, some speak less but mean
more when they eventually do. With age, more voices appear and you spend the future time
discerning them, separating them from your familial ones to the ones who just come and go.
Most of the time, they never truly leave. They just submerge. They just lay waiting beneath those
frequencies, like a behemoth in sleep in the heart of the abyss, till the right song or scale or tone
becomes a signal that stirs them.

The 1000 songs, in its disordered presentation, became a metaphysical sonar-graphickum of an
ancient archetype (for music was the first sound that created the lands) & (In music the pleasures
of paradise are orchestrated through the swamps of the infernal) and a triune-language of
unlearnt cosmogenesis.

1) It is the sicum (alt-sigil of hidden representation) of other forces. 2) The mucis (plasma of
an uncomfortable heavenly vibration) of a banished creature.; and 3)The scimu (magickal
artifact like a staff or pendant, of mystical digression) of a sorcerer or witch in exile and
always yearning.

In completion of the musical studies of the first satellite sign (1 of 1000/100) it was certain that it
wasnt sufficient to understand the genesis, exodus and revelation of this mystery. A re-listening
of the 1000 songs only introduced greater chaos and entropy to the comprehension. Months had
already been lost to this venture (or was it mere weeks?). From what I could understand, (and at
the urgings of the second voice, the shaman), the musical form of this exercise was only one part
in a part of 100 that I must complete in order to grasp the full psychic pictogram.

Duo.
130


Full moon rose in a cloudless sky. The moon is the child that I never had. The moon is my lover,
abstracted and far away. The full moon turns the tide and the tide turns the soul in its wanderings.
Its rays are the echoes. Shadowy light 100. The full moon is the full exposure of 1000. Mother
moon rising. In my death, there is the eclipse. It is what the mother promises me. The 1000/100
is most portent at 4am when the neighborhood is deep asleep. When its completely sill and
silent, when the creatures and insects of night do not stir, there seem to be nothing alive. Just the
blocks of flats, vacant and ghostly, flickering her language of on and off to her sister across her.
All the people are gone. Uninterrupted, the voice of 1000 becomes the richest in that hour. Even
my voices are subdued and in her whispering, the obsessions become the obsessed.

The mother moon speaks.
She is the half-devil. The one warned about in the cards. I understand. But this girl loves me,
this bisexual and manly woman wants me and in a way, I, her. The whole night we spoke of sex
as the people paraded around us. My eyes wandered to full bodied women as this other-human,
whom I love dearly, whisper the ways she would make love to me. I speak of her and around my
house I hear the distractions begin. The noises, the creak of metal, and the tumble of rocks at a
nearby site make their presence known. I know no ones there. She is the half-devil. The voice
of the cold, grey moon repeats. Perhaps she fears us and for us, for when we consummate our
twisted love, the cosmos would alter with each orgasm. As she and I would be altered in our
psyches. We are cosmic. We are two zeitgeists orbiting an alien sun. Our language is that of fire
and not words. A deep burning frenzy. She knows about the 1000/100 but can offer no insight to
it. For even though she represents envision de cascading pattern, invisible she can form no
understanding of 1000/100. She is the half-devil I understand and I withdraw my thoughts of
my future lover, she who is also declared eternal and unspoken of.

A parallel of me died in his sleep last night. A musician and friend to bands and studios. I bid
him rest in peace as if he were me. We share the same name. The 1000 has taken him without
violence (it is as I was told) and I bid myself goodbye In sanctuary number 2, I open the wooden
door and half of dalis prints are obscured. Below the other half is a black, empty leather chair. I
keep it empty for Salvador. He knows of the 1000/100. The 100
th
painting he did, he did it
differently. It showed itself to me on his 100
th
birthday.

Thirrdium

131

Amanstandsonabox.Behindhim,thesunisrising.Thesunissetting.Thesunisrising.Hisshadow
lengthensandshortens.Hestandsonabox,holdingupanopenumbrella.Thereisadroneinthesky,
themanisuncertainifheexists.Hefearshewillfadeawayintothelight/nightifthedronestops.The
sunisrisingandpausestoformday.
Allaroundthereislikeagreenfield,likeacrossroad,likeaplacefoundonlyinpaintingsandinthe
imaginationofchildrenbutthemanisreallythere.Wearenotthere.Wecannotbebecauseweexist
DIFFERENTLYfromhim.Weexistthroughawindowthroughwhichhelooks(helooksintothesky)atus
(throughthewindow)Thereisadroneinthegroundanditisspeaking.Thefirstvoicerosefromthe
blinkinguniverse.Sheshutshereyeandthereissinging

Fromsong,Ifindmylover,andsheisaghost.

Ihadimpregnatedherinherdreams.Shenowbearsaspiritualchildandinthatchildisinscribedmy
secretandothername.Ihavelostmyvoiceandicommunicateonlywiththought,withoutsleep.Inside
Ifeelmygirlonaswing,inthesunshine.SheislaughingbutIamnot.

Iamsomewhereelse.

Four-death.

Iamonaship.Andnooneelsecanseeme.

Theeyeoftheredstormhasrisenaboveus.Theseaisinarageofhate,lostintheblacknight,wanton
wavescrashingandbangingagainstbrittlewood,theoceanisunforgiving,thewordislost.Thecrewof
thisshipteetersontheedgeofmadnessandchaos.Iaminaninterruptushibernatathe100
th
voyage.

Inside,anobesemanisrapingadeadgirl.Shesspread-eagledonthesplinteredfloorboards,limbslimp
andshackledwithrustyclampsandchains.Heshittingher,slappingher,screamingathertomove.She
doesnt.Hertongueisfoldedback,tornandjammedinherthroat,lodgedbehindasoddenraglockedin
132

withroundsofthickrope.Bloodispouringfromhernose.Getupandfuckme!GetupandFUCKME!
screamsthefatdirtyman.Shedoesnotmove.Hereyesstarewideanddeadbackathim.

Inanotherchamberonthistwistedship,adying,frozenmaniscryingweaklyformoreopium.Hiseyes
arepaleandwhite,hisbreathinglabored,hissoultwistinginagony.Heneedstobegivenmoreopium
butthereisnone.Hehadconsumedallandtoomuchofitandnowitisallgone.Heiscryingoutweakly,
more.moremorebuthecannotraisehisvoiceagainsthisscreamingcomradefuckingthecorpse
ofateenagegirl.

Downthegalley,thereisatall,shapelyyoungwomanwithlonggrey-whitehairflowingdownthehead
ofa90yearoldcrone.Twoblack-greensnakesarepoisedandrestlessuponhershoulders.Sheissitting
atatable,staringatherdegeneratedson.Heiswildeyesandwavingabladeinhiswitch-mothersface.
Thereisamanacleclampedonhisneck,securedwithachainattachedtoawoodenboxwhichheholds
uplikealantern.Insideitisthestatue.Heyellsatherabovethedinofthestorm,yellsathertostopit
withsorcery.Shehissesback,likethesnakes,herthoughtforms,hissesathimtoabandonthestatue,to
beridofit,overboard,intothechurningsea.Hewillnotabandonhisgod.Shewillnotsuccumbtothe
deaththathascomeforthem.Hermagicisoldbutnotprimal,thestorm,itseyeandthebeholder,is
ancientandwithoutname,isfuturisticwithoutdefinition,anarchetypalimage,amaskofmanyhorrors.
Theshipissteeredintothestraits;awildislandoffersthempromiseofshelter.Theshipisalready
breakingapartandmustdock.Wavesuponwavescrashandthreatendestruction.Bytheunstablejetty,
theembattledcrewanchorsandpenetratesthejunglesbeyond.Inthedarknessthereisfiremoving.
Thesnakesofthemother-witchrecoilinaterrorthatisgreaterthantheirorigins.Thefiresmovetofind
them,thenativesofthewildlandmakepresenttheirprimalmodesofapocalyptica.Finalscreaming
ensuesandechoesthroughthedensedarkgreensandinblackness,thecrewvanishesonebyone.The
thunderstormcontinues.Thelandsquakeviolentlyintheendburnofthestatue.Tribalcries,screeching,
growling,celebratory,ritualistic,primordialENDTIMEopensupandconsumesthepastandhistorical
futureofTHEPRIMATA.FromthePRIMATAcomestheblack,night,half-sleepdreaming.Thusmyheart
almoststopped,aquivering,asuddenweaknessinabodyofbricks.Mortalitycame,gracedtheshores
ofthought.Deathvisitedandinthecinematicmind,Isawtheparadeofpeoplewhoknewme.Weeping
bymycoffin.GREENlightofhiddenworlds,eerieandotherworldly,swaminthemid-darkoftheroom;a
layerofmovinglightacrossthefilmofmyeyes.InhalfdarkIlay,quietstreamsofcognition,Avague
echoof1000/100asthefunerealprocessionfaded.Timelost(thedistortionsoftimeirreverent)the
lightofmorningrose.Iwasdyingandhaddied.Songisreconsidered

nightoftheshaman,theconqueror
theshipintheredstorm
133

ofmadnessandchaos
violentsexandharddrugs
GONE.ENDED
Thetwinidolsofaddictionandobsession
Inastatue,inawoodenbox
(coffin)
chainedtotheneck
(dominance)
ofthewitchthatfearstheprimal
(motherofsin)
oldcroneheadandbodyofayoungvirginwoman
(beyondsexualattraction;Sabbath)
oftherapistandtheopiumaddict
theshiphidesfromthestorm
(escapecondition)
anolder,primalforceconsumesthem
(cosmomega,ENDTIME)
ingreenluminanceofmagick
(hiddenpsychologicalrealmoftheunconscious)
BLACK
(formalelement)
Ihaveknownmortality
Thesignalreturnstoraiseme

Inthemorningblazeofthefieryredsky
134

youknowthatthetempestisover
anddeathhasfled.
Intothemirroryoulook,andknow
Youhavebecomemythical

Translationfromthearchaic.AbovementionedistheentitledsequenceShamaan,theconqueringand
oftheconquered.Revelationofthe100
th
voyage.

PostFIVEmorte

Ineverygenerationthereisakillerontheloose.Bytheroadside,MANSON,byhistorysmelodicpulse,
THEDOORS,bythecitywaves,morosetelevisionetcrimesceneinvestigation,bytheairwaves,thenight
caller,bytheradiostation,thefifthopusmurders,bytheartcircles,watercolordeathandthemuse.By
thepsychoanalysts,JUNG&Jungianmindspace;detailsthearchitectureofTHESHIPanditscaptain,
witch-mother,deadgirl,obeseman,frozenopiumeater;aFAMILYoffigures,roameroftheunconscious
bytheseatofthemind.Eternalenemies.Meta-dealers.The100
th
voyageisinpart,thejourneyandthe
rovingdestination,theyellowbrickroadofthought.Theshipisthemetaphysicalself,thepilgrimonhis
progress,Siddharthacrossingtheriver.TheSHIPistheself.Theelementsprotract.Rapingthedeadgirl
asfetishisticexposition.Opiumconsumptionasovertaddiction,thestatueasthetwinidols,thecentaur
asslavetoanimalpassions.Wild,lawless,offspringofcloudandrain(direNovember,rebmecedthe
red,darlingJanuarymonsoonrains.Grayness,thespaceabove,platformandcanvasofinterurptus
hibernata.

Acrosswhichthehandcreates,abrushofstrokes,cosmiccalligraphy.Iamreturnedtohyber-nation.
Thetrainsoutofmyreality.Thestationmenaremakingsureallofmeamonboard.Thestationmenall
havethefaceofmyfather.Myearsareblockingup,mylungsfeelsmaller.Itsgettinghardertobreathe.
135

Thetrainsoutofmyrealitiestakemeback.Thestation-fatherapproachesme,inblueuniform,withthe
stationmanagershat.A100dollarsforyourreturnmyson.Irememberholdingmyfatherslittle
fingerwheniwasalittleboy.a100dollarsformemories.Hesaid.Igavehimmyhand.Ifelthislittle
fingerinmineagain.Hetakesthe100dollarsfromme.InexchangeIreceivetheCHRONOticket.
InstinctivelyIplacetheticketonmytongue,likeanacidexplosion,acertainjourneynarratesitself
chaoticallytome.Acompanionfortheprogress,thetraindepartsasitiswithmindandIhearmyfifth
voicerecite:

Thedemonraverborneofthissolitude,thismomentinrain,inmomentafterthedownfallofnature's
darkcallingtofeed.Avampirismofsortsonthelifeoflogicandchoicefacedthefacadewithanelohim
withthechaosthingthatresidesbeyondanticipation.Peeringintothemindofmadness,discoveringits
soulthroughtrajectory,darkdrumsinthenightofthebohemianking.Chooseyourpath,yourshadowy
pill,unleashedthethingsbehindyou,lurkingbeyondyourreceptiveandyourneurotransmittercages.
beatbeatbeatintothebrokenmind,unfetteredsoul,spiritborneoffire,HolyGhostpower,wheredid
thisvisioncomefrom,where,thewartimecrisistheendoftheearthisuponussaysthecosmicdust
songandhereanticipateanti-psychotic-thesis.Conceptmurderer,aloofnessinthetowerofyourdestiny
pastliferemnants.Deteriorateattherateofextortion,somejunkiespiritsabotagedyourlustforlifeand
nowyouareinhunger,awanting,asuddenclear-visionofwhereyouareandyouarealonehere.faces
stareoutatallangles,facesdevouringthenotions,yourlove,theeternalsheabandoningtheforcethat
youusedtocreateherandsherecreatesherselfasapartreconstructingtherulesandtheyearpassed
andyouturnedintoafractal,anoverpoweringdemeaning,ahallucinationofsorts,dreamedupinthe
headofhemirrorthateveryonecallsgenius.Unbalancedlucidity,meaningnomeaningnonsensical
charmingkingofthecon-fusion-jazzmasterpiece.inDEDICATUMtotheeyesthatreadandanguishover
youroversedation.incomaliesthesheepqueen,theplacidinnocentcruxofthetreasureboxof
surrealism.holidaysinthedesert,oasisthirstthrowingsceneriesatyouonthewingsofbirdsintheghost
penisofallenginsberg.CELEBRATUM,therectumburstsfullofbloodgrotesqueandyouqueueintothe
nighttimeblissofthediscodancerfeatherboaredballoonnotionpointsdestinationsdelusionsrecurring
themesinthenarrativeofafictionalfrictionallife.abusethemythabusethemuserapethehordesof
theunderling,thephotoeyethecensoredbrainthepurityoftheminduncloudedanditsfarawaynow
fromthechestofyourdrawersthecabinetofmonstersopeninguplungstoshowyouacarnivalofthe
abhorrentandthedepravedsexualdysfunctionofthegenerationthatgrewuponbinaryandexpelled
fromuniversityintothepitsoftheflamingstreetsofpostpostmoderntokyoultramanfantasy.Mutants.
wearethemutantsoftheneworderandTHEYwanttogetustokillustoberidofusthemindmasters
themaestroofthemagickalkingdomsetintheheartoftheneighborhoodigrewupin.thewarriorsand
sagesandgleamingknightssavingtheprincessandthebeaststhatmarryintothelivesofangelsto
seductionturnsintodestructionandthealarmbellsrunoffintothedirectionoftheflyingdragon-spirit-
necromancer.burnoutthefantastikunloadthegrowththatpoisonsyourmindintothisnewphase
whereyoumustshedtheskinofyourconcurrentwavethatthrowsyouoffthetrajectoryorbitofsanity.
madnessbecomesthelover.shoottheromanticdeejay,thecanvasjointsuperheroesarepaintingsona
136

page.thenoveloftheabsurdhastakenlifeinrealityandclaimedusinitscast.SURREALISMEhascome
hometothechildrenoftheforlorn.Launchingarevolution.

Six

Iamwakenedbythestaticwaitress.Hairfallingintussles.Herperfumeiserotic
anythingyouneedsire?
Iwanttofuckyou.
no,thankyou
Ireclineintomyownrecital
Sheleavesmetothe

INCUBATION OF THE TEMPLE



there's a seething horrotica broiling within
called, growth in the womb of repressed sexuality
Self-contained to be powered.
this privately occult ceremony is simmering
waiting to rear its fathomable head
i feel walls built around my mind
I'm locked in, violent towards its external oppressors
(whom i have named and sanctioned)
its the eve of the DOG
137

families in red and pink escape their daily homes
the nuclear visits the unclear
celebratory with food and mahjong
then, I cannot face them


(isolate)



this is my isle (which shall be demonized upon me)
this is my room of reclusion (which will bury me)
i cannot break free (ejaculate)
i am contained but there is no container (woman)

there is no sense in sexploitation.
my gut is trembling (but masturbation is futile)

exit human error

Ihadfearedthepageofthemotherbook1000.Ihavelongsincebeengonefromsuchdreams(andthat
dreamwhichallwasbuilt)themother-shamanvisitsmeandasks,whatareyoudoinghere?youhave
somuchpotential,shesays.ButIneverwantedtosavetheglasscityfromitselfandthisyear,while
thereisadoubleseventhmonth,theghostshavemoretimetoroamwhileIremainlostinsafety,safein
alostworld.ThepriceIpayshallbesmallasthepowersthissimplicitybuilds,shallbemightyinthe
schemeofallthings.Theirreversibleitconjures.Thepageisagainwritten.Thememorybecomesastate
ofmind.Ihaveinturn,becometheblackhole,andmemoryofbeingthereislimited,itseemedlikean
instantthatIwasback,buttheoutsiderstellmeitsbeeneightmonthssincebutinside,Iknowitsbeen
muchmorethanthat.
138

Seven.

Holysacrednumerical.

139

SIDE BAR
8/7/07 12:06 am - 'exiteans' : an oratory by Victorious the leper
whosaysiamtodisturbpeople?!
whentheyallwalkpastwithtransientthought?
whosaysiamanuisance?!
wheniamheretowarntheshoppersandpridefulmen!
thishereissacredgroundyoudesecrate!
thisoldhillrapedapartbyyourmachines!?
doyouknowthisglassbehemothyoubuild
shallbetheglitteringtombstoneofyourfuture?!!

heednotthewordsofVictoriantheleperandyoushallendinastateworstthanmine!
befinishedallofyouifyouproceed!
doyounotknowthemenwhodiedonthishill?
doyounotknowofthechildwhohadleaptintotheriverbehindthetrees?!
youdonot!youknownothing!
fortoknowisbecomelikethehomelessman!
whowoulddwellwithgladnessintheslumpsofthiscitythantodwellbythisgateatthethresholdof
yourhell!

stupiditytheconsultants!
140

yourcranesanddigsandmachines!
whatdoyoubuildheredoyouknow?!
itisbabelonceagainbutreachingforgreaterheightsofsuffering!
becastoffallofyourshadows!
hallucinogenswillbethedevourerofyourmasshysteria!
thebaronswhoshalloccupythesummitsofthisglasstotemwillruinyourlives!
run!
runfromthisIONyoucallprogress!
RUNfromthismadnessofdestinations!
thisspiritsoilwillbeyourhaunting!
thememoryofyourmarkets,perishedwillbethenightmareofyourowndoing!
theworldhasnotendedmypeople!
itisENDING!slowly,withdefinite,thecrawlingcanceronthesoulofyourhome!
thisgroundhasbeenblasphemed,andforyourignoranceoftheblotofthismyth
theexistencefedbythisextravagancewillbeyourdownfall!
bewarned!heedthewordsofvictorioustheleper!
forhispeacewillcomewhenheisnomore
andhissufferingsbecastdownuponyou!

spill of the purple box
inthe21stmovement
thepurpleboxspilled
dirtytobaccocold
reapedfromthepreviousfields
nailscutfromthecreature
hardeneddeadskinscratch
bloodstainsoldonleaves

feedingtorturousbody
oletmesleep,pharmaceutica
allowmecryingforadeadpanheart
tastingsandinthemouth
crushedbetweenteeth
grainsofburialgrounds
followthemaster.

launchoffuneralsuites
carefulclothesfordisplay
thewalkingdead
perfectforaperfectwake
141

half-medicineforasourwound
half-eatencatatonia
i'veforgottenthenameofthesickness
thewraiththatstealeththememory

thegreatplasticmachines
emptieththefigures
withoutamounts,thereptilegoeshungry
afinishedfireinthegroin
o'followtheriverGa

mindalienated,weepingforconversion
thesoulindislocation,ofcolddubiousprisons
walkingthroughthehalls,ofgraysharedcorridors
horrorandmelancholicarethemasksonthewalls

thegreatmigration,undertake
scorchedundersun,thewalkofburntfeet
buyoutthesanctuaries
findinghavenherefromthehells
o'safetyfromthestarsdelirium
o'shelterfromthewitchingstorm
deliverus,voldinthestrange
fromthisstarknemesisofnight

-excerptsfrom"afeveredprayer":
journalofincantationstovoldinthestrange.
authordeceased.

8/24/07 12:08 am - transmigrations to the mountain of steel
oftheearlierpartsofourtrip,wecouldnotremember.
wehadtoabandonthecarintheburninglots,
movingfarawayaspossiblefromtheotherinfernosofmetal.
childrenandfamilieswatchedtheirvehiclescrackleandmeltintheheat
blackbonfireschockedtheblackenednight.
slapsoficeandsludgespatteredinthefaces
againstthecoldwastoxicheat,apoisonedspitofrain.
thefamiliesfiledthroughthegatesonebyone,backsturnedtotheburninglot.
142

wherewasworsetheycouldnottell
thecitythattookitsownlife
robbedthemofprophecies.
tothestations,theyhadtomarch
alongblisteringfeetinsoilsuffocation.
thefiresthrewhellishlightagainstthehungofburdenedsmog
athick,obscuredheavenabouttocollidewiththesufferers
likeonhardmoongroundwetread
theweightofourbooks,murkyjarsandritualstickskeptusstraining
keepingus,guardingusfromthatnightmareofsleep.
exhausted,fidelitieslow,awallofdistortedsoundspossessesus
anagelonggroanfromthecrackedcryingvoiceoftheelders

ourstationswasfar
asthecrowdspartedpastthegatestothemountainofsteel.

8/26/07 01:03 am - otherbreed


ihadtodrawoutthemapof1000.100withmyblood.
myvictimhadallofherblooddrawnoutsoicouldnotuseit.
shewascoldandshriveledandinreposeintheprayingroom.
herbloodwasaheadymixturewithmine.pumpingthroughmysystembecomingone.
thecutsimadeonmyarmswerealreadyhardening.
ourbloodonthefloor,whichmarkedoutonlythebordersof1000.100,wasalreadyturninggray.
Iwasalreadyhalf-waysickandprayedtothedeadgirlintheprayingroom.
toomuchofourbloodwaslosttothemap.toomuchwasteofthevolatileessence.
thesmellofthissacrilegehadalreadyattractedthemonsters.
icouldhearthemhowlingandbreathingatthegatesandatthesealedwindows.
theywantedtodefilethecorpse'dchildinmyname.
theywantedtoconsumemyfleshandbesaved.

i've given out drugs for people to kill themselves
i choose no other way for their ways are also true
i allow them expressions for their beliefs
for it is their beliefs that set them free
they die altered, unafraid
they die, worthy of things greater than the life they leave behind
i deal death to the different and make all the difference.

143

the virus attacks again
and my skin crawls like a sharp animal, like a fevered grip
the pipe of opia rests on its glass side
the smog in the room suffocates and enlightens
and in the grim dirty air, i read the future for the worst of us.

8/31/07 12:22 am - erratic observances and difficult witnessing thereof
post-script*:thusbeinganexcerptfromtheobservanteduniumberot1000.100delafringekaamp
aswrittenbydo-no-gowilliams,theblind

therawandredhorseswouldbethefirstcreaturesyouseeasyounearthecityofGa
somemaybeintheirdeaththroes,screechingintocratersthey'vedugwithbloodiedhoofs
othersmaybeturningblind,mturningrampageagainstthelepersthatlookafterthem.
theyoungeroneswouldstillberunningfuriouslyoutintotheplains,thenreturning,withequalfervorto
thelengthsofropestheycallhome.
whattheyexperienceouttherewherenoillorbravehumandwell,noonetrulyunderstands
theyareoftenseenalmoststillintheshimmeringwaveheatrisingforsomeminutesbeforetheyturn
andrunback,asifsomeforceinthedistancehadtoldthemtoreturntousoraftertheyseemtohave
absorbedcertainfacultiesandbehaviors.upontheirreturns,dotheybegintoturnblind,tobegin
neighingatunseenforms,restlessinthecompanyofabsentthings.theirbloodrunsthickerandharder
astheyage.theprocessofrunningoutthenbackappearstobethecatalystoftheirdeaths.


9/5/07 12:12 am - red voices
we'vesentmachinesuntotheholygrounds
thereddustriseswithanalienwind
soil,trampledbycold,cluelessforces
willbringusagreaterapocalypse.

-fractura,theestranged.
-

144


9/5/07 11:36 pm - the breakdown of Ercondus the traveler, in the glass
city
themassofwires
becomebigger,morecomplex
entangledonthefloorofthesanctuary
untouchedbooksmount
pagesturningyellowwithageandhistory
half-writtendementiaofhalfforgottenpeople
semiburied,barelyalive
otherbrokenstickslay
burntortarred
offeredandpenetrated
asweforgettheshapesoftemples
countingdownthesecondsinthehouseonthehill
leavingasthebelltolls
anotherrequiemrequired
anotherdownfallofnight
twicetraveledtothecity
therestlessandpsychoticheart
searchesinvain
wastedanddepravedinthebowelofthemonster
forarealizedshore
adriftedthesecondtime
theinsectboardsthechangingship
andalteredroutesbringharvest
ofnestsspoiledintheheartofthecity
o'fortuna...
yourstobethegreatofdebris...


9/8/07 02:25 am - a recollection by Justice Thorn, the deviant
smartartgirlwassprawledonthebedinherblacklacygarmentsbutihadnomoodtobangher
ihadpaidwellenoughforherthoughbutwascontenttowatchherunravelfromthepillsifedher.
imaybeananimalthiswaybutshewanteditmorethansex.thoselittleblueshutdownpills.
sheprobablymissedherfamilybackhome,inthatothercountry.
sheprobablyknewshecouldtakethenightofffromthefuckingwhenshewaswithme.
sheprobablyknewthatiknewwhatsheneededbutididn'tquite.
145

iwasjustfinishingoffmydebts,givingoutthelastsevenofthepillstomeetmyquota.
salvationwasnear.
anotherwastedgirlweepingoveracrazedcareerwillsleeplikeababyandpurgethosenightmaresout
ofhersystem
anotherburntoutdealershallholdherclosewhensheshuddersfromthosedreams.
andthesunwouldriseagainonusthenextmorning
thenourworkwouldbeginagainwhenwepart
andthoughnothingoutsidewouldsignalachange
somethingelsewithinwill.


10/1/07 02:09 pm - I love you to death
Iaskedhernicelyinthebeginning
whenwesatinmylittlehousefortea
"wouldyouliketoactinmysnufffilm?"
shecouldnottakemeseriously
shewaslaughingandsaidiwassilly.
Itriedagain
"you'reinyourprime.itsagoodagetodieacelebrity."
shetoldmetostopit.stillinherplayfullittleway
ifeltthedejectioncomingon.
"howamigoingtoenjoymysuccess?"sheasked.almostplayingalong.
Itoldher,"iwillbuildashrinefromyourtornclothes.yoursoiledundergarmentswouldbeholy."
icouldseeshewasstartingtobeuncomfortable.
myfacewasseriousenough.
"youneedtofindagirlfriend."
howdiditadduptothisididn'tsee.
"bloodismoresacredthankissesandbloodageslikewine."
"areyoucallingmeoldmister?"hereyebrowswentup,readyforaplayfulfight.
iwasn'tinthemoodtobeplayful.
Thecomradestookherfrombehind
creepingfromthehiddenrooms
whathadbeenanemptylittleapartmentwithjustthetwoofus
turnedintotheperfectnightset.
shetrashedwhenthecrewpreparedher
thetripodstandscameout.mobileHDDrecording.
nonoisefromthatcheapmouthofhersstuffedwithragssoakedingasoline.
iheardherclothesrippingasthefloodlightserected
hereyeswerewildandnolongerplayful.
146

"wecanonlydothisonce."itoldthecrew.
shewasquiteafighter.
smallrazorbladesareperfectforpetitefeistygoddesses.
"rolltape."


10/1/07 11:48 pm - the bitter bowl of ercondus
sorryisthesight
oftheweepingman
vulnerableandweakandonhisknees
unabletoswallowdisturbance
hewhotrembleslikeachild
wettinghimself

howsorrowfulhislittleheart
mutilatedlikeasparrow
ofmeatandbonecrushedtogether
themishapofhisdestiny

howfrailandtearfultheman
whosespinenolongerkeeps
therightfulmanstanding

fallen,worsethanfirstfather
fallen,worsethanmorningstar
aninsignificantdrop
inthegreatviolenceofthesea

praisebethemenwhosawmonsters
whokeptmonstersintheirguts
whotreadgroundshorridandpainful
whodweltintheshadowsnotmeantformankind

praisebethetortured,themaniacal
fortheirswerethemindsofgods
whosefearlessnessbroughtshameandsuffering
whosedejectiondivertsthedemons

praisebethefrightening
147

forintheirheartstheyharborhell
ofitsgeneralsandofitskings
keepingthemfromthedoors

praisebethecrossbearers
fortheweightontheirshoulders
takestheweightofffromworlds

tornasunder,littlelife.rejoiceandbeglad!

turnyourbacksfromthisjungle
return
toyourdailysun
forsuchnightsshallforgetthyname
benevolenceshallbebought
forihaveseensoyouneednot.

--fromtheorationsofashcrowtheblind

10/2/07 12:19 am - tongue of the demon ORO
Ifoundthemanweepinginthecorner.
Frailandalone
Skinandbones
Heshookwithsuchsorrow
Suchdespairing
Therewerepiecesoftornclothesbeforehim
Hewasnakedandwettinghimself.
Hesobbedhardintotherustedwall
Thenamewrittenonitwaslonggone
(Hebegandefecating)
Hestartedtoshiver.
Hecouldnotseemebutheknewmysmell
Itwasworsethanthemesspooledaroundhisfailingbody
Helookedupintomydirection
Eyesmilkyanddim
Hestoppedsobbing.Hestoppedshivering.
WithhiswetbowelsIdrewthesymbolsonthewall
Iwrotethelanguagewiththebloodinhisurine
WiththewordsonthetoiletfloorIreleasedhim
AndwiththedeathinmyhandIgavehimrest.
148


10/5/07 03:36 am - "All monsters are borne of depression." - Tomas,
Ixtaeon
theroomwastriangular
withoutwindowsordoors.
thesquaredarkwoodtablewasoutofplace
takinguptoomuchspaceinclaustrophobia.
thelightcamefromtheburningcards
thesmokecausingtheskyofastormtodescend
themanstoodthere
nameless,naked
fondlingablacklaceglove.
thecardsofferedimagesofbrokencars
prostitutes,lightheadedwanderingsofwisemen
variancesofdisturbance
perversities,soiledundergarments.
"they'vemadethefilm."cameavoice
amongthebabelofvoices,junglefever,dementia
"thetoothisbrokenandsetincrimsondrink."
thegroundshakes,bombsunearthingtombs
'thestingofascorpionisasutureinreality.
"imaginationandtrickeryarefarmorepowerfulthantruth."
"thereisnovantagepointfromwhichtoviewthismadnesscorrectly."

iforgetthenameofthisillness
iforgetitsprotgs,itspredecessors.
iforgetthethingitdesires
iforgetthewayitgavemelife.

andsoikilledit.
theblackbug.
itsbloodremainsonmyfinger
itsdamagedcarcass,twistedbythesoundsystem
itsthornedlegstillmoving.

&thuswasbeheadedththemonste
149


10/6/07 02:29 am - the matrimonies and funerals of koto the immortal
thewhiskeyandtheblackflowersaregone.likethecrazycleanupafterafuneralpeoplesitaroundat
tablesandeatfoodfrompaperplates.theflowersarestrewnonthefloor.theredplasticchairsare
stackedupandinsteadoftablecloths,whiteplasticsheetsarethrownovertheroundtablesandtiedoff
attheends.thechickenbonesarelitteredonthetables.dropsofcurryspreadingslowlydownthesides
ofthetablelegs.peopletalkabouttheweather,aboutwhatitwouldbelikeatthecrematorium.they
would'ntknow.theyaretheonesleftbehindtowatchoveremptytents,thecasketbeinglonggone
withtheothercrowd.theleftoverpeopleremaintomakesurenoonestealsthetelephonewiresand
thepacketsofdrinksleftinthemobilerefrigerator.thewhiskeywasdonewiththenightbefore,when
thegamblingwasmostnotoriousandthebodywasstillaround.isataroundanemptytable,refusing
food,thinkingofanothercigarette.theblackflowersweregoneandsowasmywife.ididnotwishto
seehergointothefire.Ioptedout."youshould'vegonewith"mystareshutherup.theotherwoman
leftheretotendtheplasticchairs.sheofferedmecigarettes,perhapstoatone,apologize.islippedone
outofthepack.shehelpedmelightitup.Iflinchedatthefirealittle.icheckedmywatch.they
would'veburnedmydeadwiferightaboutnow.wasileftherenowtobeobligatedtoherbereaved
family?wasshelookingdownatmefromwhereversheis,shakingherheadatmylackoffaith?wasshe
upsetthatididn'tsendheroff?iwould'ntknowsuchthings.toguessatitwouldbetobringgriefand
guiltuponmyself.ihadlovedherwellinlifeandnowshewasgone.itwassimple.itwouldbesimpler
withouther.ifinishedthecigarette,heavedthatlastsigh,pickedupmyjacketandleft.itoldtheboy
watchingthetablesthatthemineralwatermustbeguardedtoo.intruth,iwaslettinghimdomydirty
work.ifsomeonewantedtostealthewaterfrommywife'sfuneral,ishouldn'tbetheonetostopthem.
itwouldnotbefairtotheheartnorthethief.itwouldshowaloopholeinthemisery.ihadnoheartto
turndownathirstymanjustbecausemywifewasdead.itrampledonthecoloredflowersontheway
out,intothesun.tomorrowwouldbeanotherday.itwouldbeeasiertobuythewhiskeythen.theclean
upwould'vebeendone.everythingwouldreturntonormal.iwouldfindmyselfanewwife.thendrink
untilshediedbecauseicouldnot.

10/7/07 02:01 am - memoirs of Weed Django
wasLuciousAvotheonlyonelefttosaveme?
thoughfictional,hehadtobe.
thestoneofblack,
thatpatheticpebblefromshore'seternity
wastoberelegated.
takenbytheking'smenandnotbyforce
butforemotionalluxury,transformationandswiftness.
howswiftthenthetimewouldcome
howdramaticthisending
whensuddenly
150

thevastandforevershorewouldloseapebble.
"ludicrous."Luciouswouldsay.
"youshouldnowfindyourselfabigfuckingrock!"he'llcontinue.
Luciousthelunaticwouldgoontocancelhisencoreattheconcert
thencometothebombedoutofficetovisitmeintheelevatorshaft.
Avo'svoicewouldbethesustenanceinsuchaworld
andhewillcomfortmewithhiscoolbehemothrage.
"laughingmenwillmendtheloss."hewouldadvise
"requiemsrequiremorethoughtthanheartbreaks.yours,isofthemilesdaviskind."
kindhe'llbeinthosehours.hewillpourwhiskeyforme,stolenfromfunerals.
hewouldtellmeofhowhesangforasnufffilmsoundtrack
thenpaidapriceheavierthanhisperson
forLusciousAvoisabigman.
withoutthetuxandthefedoraandthegoggles
he'llbemistakenforsomeprimatewarlord.allbruteandbrawnandskullsaboutathicktreelikeneck.
andperhaps,heisone.withhisvoicethathadonce,accordingtomyth,resetthelocksofhellgate,not
allowingsomekingstoreturntotheirinfernalhome.
manyarestillangrywithhimbut
"Bigdevilscanalsoweep,foriknowthenamesoftheirdeadlovers."
andhedid.ibelievedhimthenandstilldonowashestandsatthefootoftheshaftlookingdownatme.
hishandbehindhisback,graspingtheguitarthathangsinablackbag.
"thefuckingstonewillbegone!"heyelled.icouldsmellliquor.
ohgod...
hecontinuedtobanterprophetically,
"theonlyremedyisnecromancy!
weshallraisefromthegrave
thegeistofNeon!"

Ilitupthepipe.
ishookmyhead.
nottoreject,buttoresign.

onlydeadkingscansavemenow.

151

10/8/07 12:26 am - the confession of Weed Django-outher publicist.
TheinsufferableNeonKingwouldanalrapethespiritsthatchosetodiefromheartache.
"theymustbemadeexamplesof"heexplainedduringthelastghostfestival.
themadghosthadsatisfiedhislustmightilyinthatmonth
"forthosewhokilledthemselvesweremakingupforthelovenotlovedbytheothers,whomwerebusy
lovingotherthings."
sotheylovedtoomuchmoreandwhenitwastimefortheloss,onlydeathcoulddeliverthemproperly.
"foolishgames"hequotedJewelthesinger."myhungerfortheheartbrokenwillbebottomless."he
prophesiedtohimself
andherehewasnow,freshfromthenecromancyofLusciousAvo.
inasuccessionofsixteensadsodomizedlovesongs,hecastthecalltobringtheLordghoulofburntlove
lettersback.
immediatelyhebegantosmellmypain."ahhhhhhhhh"herelished."anotheroneafteranotherone
afteranotherone.youneverevermadeitdidyou?allyourlife..."
thesaltinthewoundwasslowandmechanicalliketheslaughterhouses.thebloodstirredthesharkin
theking.itsphantomstomachgrowled.
"youarenottopenetratethisman."Lusciouscommanded,beingthebeastwhocalleduponthisgreater
terror."youarebuttoaidehimoutofthewoods."
hedidnotanswer.Ifearedformyheart.Hetookalongtimetocontemplateashistonguelashedoutto
tastetheairaboutme.
hecouldtellmyheartwasalreadybleedingtheblackblood.slowlyandsurelyitwoulddie.

araw,wetmess.

TheNeonKingtiltedhisheadtome,whiteyellowllightglowingfiercelyfromhisemptyeyesocketsand
blackholemouth.
"explaintometheterrainofyourheartforher."hesaid,hypnotic.

andsoidid.

"hernamedidnotbelongtolossnordiditbelongtoanygain.herloveissatellite.there,butfaraway.
whenshecamenear,shewaslikethemoon,affectingthisearthsostronglythatinherabsenceinthe
morningsun,thelandswouldfeelrichandpotentbutultimatelyemptyfortherewasnoseedfrom
whichtheflowercouldgrow.havingthepotentialdidnotbringforthreallife.theloveimagined,though
strongandpowerfuldidnotmeanicouldholdherclose.iamtoobadlyblemishedtobecalledloverby
aheartsopure.ihavehiddenmyfaceinshamefromthegoddessfortheimpurecannottouchtheface
ofgod."

"ludicrous."LusciousAvosaid.

152

Theinsufferablelordwassilent.

10/8/07 11:57 pm - the wake up off Weed DJango
thelastthingirecallwasthesoundbeingstolenfrommyhearing
thesilenceoftheNEONKINGhitmelikebadvertigo
whenicameto,hewasgone.amidgetwastendingtomybandagedarms.
"thecolorwouldn'trunifyouletthebloodmixwithit."themidgetspoke.goingabouthisduties.
"mynameistom-tom.iamcountAvo'sassistant."hestuckoutatinyhand.ishookitwithafewfingers.
iwasusuallyusedtothisbutnotwhenmyheadisinthisstate.ipattedaboutmypersonforcigarettes
andfoundthatiwasnakedandblasphemous.isuddenlyfeltsick.
"nono"tomtomsaid."donotvomithere."hegavemeabucket.thenauseastopped..
"youcanusethemforweepingtoo."heofferedafterseeingmenotpuke.butihadnomoreintentions
forweeping.
"thehouroftheweepingmanispast."itoldthemidget.
nowwasthetimeoffreezingup.gritlikeacoiledspring.atautwiresettoburstinslowmotiontension.
ifeltgrotesque,beingnakedupontheivorybed.therewastheheadofamammothonthewall.
"theCounthasgonetofetchhisbrothers,"themidgetsaid,lookingupatmewithsmallbeadyeyes,then
softer,"theneonkingisstillburningpicturesofher."
itwasthenthatirealizedicouldnotrememberherfaceanymore.

somethinghadhappenedduringmyblackout.
ifeltfrigidbutfree.myarmsthrobbedwithacertainsting.thenirealizedihadgottentattoos.


10/11/07 03:58 pm - pub de la blues
thiswasanolddrinkingplace,fromthetimebeforethered
atimebeforethenuclearwinters.thenighticamein,ifoundanewpictureonthewall
153

shewasattractive,awoman,somewouldevenconsideragoddess
butitwasstilljustapicture,anequivalentoftheblackstone,theywerethesamething,athingof
power,ofmemoriesandburningpolaroids.
theneonkingwasrisenagain.icouldsensehisglowingyelloweyes,therayofsunlightbeamingfrom
hismouth
ihalfexpectedhimhereinthepub,drinkingheavilyafterhisoperation
butonlytheregularmiserieswerehere,theLordnowhereinsight.
ifoundRequieminthecorner,hewasmucholderthanhewasinthebooks
themakerofthewoodenwatchtowerwasslumpedoverthepiano.theP.Acouldn'tgetmorethana
droneoutofitsblackbabycoffinlikespeakers.
ganjasmokewaftedfromnearby,thedrinkswerenearsolidandheavywithtears.theharvestwas
alwaysrichafterthehouroftheweepingman,
thedrinksmostpotent.ihadexpectedmoresoulsinhere,iexpectedevolutiontotakeitsproperpath
butthingswere'ntright.thepianomanwasnowherearound.thebartenderlookedsleepy.
therewasasadandpsychoticairtotheplacethistime.icouldfeelthewildweteyesscanningthe
horizons,atwistedseverityinthebreathsofthepatrons.anelderlywomanwasweepinginthephone
booth.achildhadburiedatoytruckinthesoil,afterbreakingopenasmallportionofthewooden
floorboard.therewasashiveringmanatthebar.
iwentuptohim.iofferedhimadrink."thereisnomorepoint,"hereplied,"thecomingofdire
novemberisneithertoolongnortoocloseaway."hischoiceofwordswerestrange.notentirelyfitting
forprophesying.heseemedlikeamanwhohadlovedandlostandlovedandlosttoomanytimesto
care.helitupapipefilledwithpoisonedflowers.suckinginsmoke,heaskedmewithexhalation,"why
doyoustopinsuchaplace?"hegesturedaround,ipondered.""thebestplacetoregroupiswithbroken
beings."heagreedwithaslightnodthensaid,"ihopeyouarenotexpectingacrowd,ercondus.people
dontbreakthewayyouandibreakanymore.theybreakoverpointlesstransientthings.""howdoyou
knowmyname?""iamtooatravelingmanandalltravelingmenwouldhaveheardyourexistence.he
suckedhardagainonthepipeandleanedtome,"haveyoulostyourwaymyfriend?ordoyouknow
whichendoftheworldyoubelongto?"i'iknow"itoldhim.heletoutabellowagreeablelaughthen
said,"timedoesnotstopforatravellingmanbutitdoessoforanimmortal."icouldsuddenlysmellthe
foreverofhisblood.myhearthungered."mynameiskototheimmortal"theshiveringmansaid,"andi
amdying."
iboughthimandmyselfthedevil'ssaltandwedranktodeath."ludicrous."cameavoicefrombehind.
thetravellerhadjustarrived,droppinghisblackguitarbagintotheseatnexttomeandkoto."onewhite
russian."hetoldthebarkeep."andtwoblackrussiansformybrothers."twomoremoretravelers
settlednexttothefirst.istaredintothemagicmirroracrossus.fiveblackbirdsonafencelookedback.
onehadaredroseinitsbeak.another,atarotcard.thefool.

kotoremarked,"whathasnotend,hasbegunagain."wealldranktothat.
154



10/12/07 01:16 am - the journals of Ercondus, the traveler
Rest.regroup.

theblackstoneonthewallfacehadchangedposition.therewasnodayornightoutside.timecanbe
irrelevantordestructiveinthisplace,dependingonwhoiswatching.tonight,thereisonlytenofusin
thepubdelablues.ihadchosenadifferentcornertosettlein,awayfromthebar,fromthestopover
crowds;towatchthem.toseewheretheirpathsshalltakethemandwiththem,mine.

asfarasicouldtell,thethreelatevisitorswouldnotstayforlong.
theyweremovingonelsewhere,aplace,ahouse.theeldestofthethreebrothersisLusciousAvo,abig
maninasuit,afedoraandblackgoggles.trainedasaclassicalvocalist,healsoplayedprogressivejazz
androckguitar.hehadgoneinsearchofhistwobrothers,OqulusandCirqu.IlikeCirquthebest.histop
hatandtuxmakeshimlooklikeaskinnystagemagician,buthissalvadordalimustacheandfreddy
mercuryonacidpresencemadehimtobethenatureofthemagicitself.therewasasurrealismabout
him,astrangeandtwistedpowerthathallucinatesyourreality.ipicturedhimtobethemost
appropriatepersonthatcouldlinkwiththeneonking.yet,isenseitisnothimwhoraisedthedeadlord.
oqulusappearstobethemysterytempleofthethree.perhapsitishimwhomhadprovided
necromancy.isensehimtobeashadowyzeitgeist,droningattheedgeofanunsuspectingera.thereis
nothingmoreicantellfromthethird.

themakerofthewatchtowerisstillpassedout.
ithoughtisawhimmovebutitcould'vebeeninvoluntary.thispubistheonlyplaceknowntohave
survivedthenuclearwinters.theotherstandingmonumentisthewatchtowerwhereapoweronce
resided,watchingoverthewastedlands.itsmakertooisanimmortal,likekoto,whowasnowaloneat
thebar,drinking.

Koto'swifeisdead.

partofhislifedeemedoverandhewasherewaitingforsomethingtohappenoutsidepubdelablues.
whatwashispowerorpotentialidonotknow.asadmanhashisrightstosecrets.atsomestage(time
isimmemorable)thestonesonthefaceonthewallsshiftedagainandifoundadeathoccurringinmy
heart.Theweepingwomanhadstoppedweeping.thephoneboothwassilentbuticouldseethatshe
hadshriveledandwasnowacorpsewiththesmallfaceofabat.herrowofyellowingteethstoodout
likearatsandherframewastinierandmorefragile.herskin,wrinkledandgreyandcoldhungonher
bodylikedriedtowelsonsticks.butthepowerofherweepinghadgivenhersoulacertaindepth.she
wouldnowclimbuntotheblackbabygrandpianoandlaydownlikearoyalcorpse.shewouldstop
breathingandwouldrestwithherhandsclaspedineachotheronherchest.manywillpayherhomage.
thesleepingdeadbathagoftheblues.thechildwhohadburiedhistoyweptatherfeet."nomoredig
155

sand.nomoredigsand"hewouldrepeat.isawhimholdingthetoymodelofanexcavator.thehag
womanhadherpowerbroughtthroughtothechildforhesoonstoppedrepeatingchildishwordsand
becamegraveandsilentasiflisteningtosomeunheardofvoice.heremainedsilentallthewhile.

itwasrequiem,however,whochosetocometome.
"i'vebeenanoldenoughforceintheworldsmademanifesttounderstand."hebeganashesatdown
withhisgin.upcloseheappearedevenolderstill."youhavetheBookofLoredon;tyou?"heasked,
politely,takingdownanothermouthful."doyouseethataftertheapocalypse,therewasno
revelation?""itwasnotmeanttobe."itoldhim."no,"heleanedforwardalittle,"therevelationisat
restandwillriseagainlikethatofNeon.theyaremerelyasleepbutwillawakelikethatofDjango.they
havebeenevolvingbeneaththewavesofconsciousness.theyhavebeenchanginguntothatofthe
counts,three,likethatofyou,likethatofme."heleanedbackagaintodrainhisglass.ilitupacigarette.
"thetimeoftheweepingmanisnomore!"adrunkLusciousavoexplainedtohisbrothers.ilookedat
thedeadsleepingwomanandthesilentchild.Thedoorsofthepubdelabluesopenedup.

atalldarkmanwalkedin,smokingajoint.

"sothisiswhereyoucometowhenlifelosesthemeaning."heannounced.tookadrag,"aperfectplace
tobeginanewlore."


10/14/07 12:45 am - the request of J in pub de la blues.
atfirst,ithoughtitwasababythatclungtothebackofthedarkman
butitwasasmallgolem.aclaymonster,greyandbaldandgrotesque.
thetallmanshookoffthedustfromhislongcoat,hestubbedouthisjointinanemptycupandwalked
tothedeadsleepingwoman.
heletthegolemcrawloffhisbackandthecreaturewentontopatthechildonhishead.
"somebodygivethisboyadrink"themansaid,"andgetmeabeer."
theenergiesinthepubdelabluealteredwithhisarrival.hecheckedhiswatchandisensedhisheart
beatingfast
buthestayedcool."somebodytellmethere'saspaceportnearby..."
nooneanswered.thebartenderdeliveredthedrinksthensaid,"iftherewasone,itsoff-function.closed.
dead."
"well,openitup."themansaid.
requiemresponded,"andwhoareyoutosaysuchthings?"
"iamJ."hereplied,"iselldrugstothegods."
CountAvointerceded,"myLordrequiresLSD95."
Jlookedathim,fumblinghiscoatandfishingoutapipe."yougetmeaworkingspaceportandigetyou
yourlocotraine."
156

ihadtoask,,"whydoyouneedaspaceport?"
Heturnedgrave.asifhewasangrythatnooneknew.
"AZAiscoming.whereelsewouldAZAdock?"
"drugsarenoreasonforustoopenuptheportagain."thebartendersaid.
"ah,"Jturnedtohim,"thenyoureallydon'tknowthepowerandmercyofAZA"
"Nogodhaseverdelieveredthepubanditspatrons"thebartenderexplained,"we'reagivencosmic
cog."
"
"whosaysyouaretobedeliveredfromyourmiseries?"Jreplied,"whendireNovembercomes,andthe
redafterthat,therewouldbeworsethingstodealwiththanpettymiseries,eternaltheymaybe."
myheartskippedabeat.asuresignthatwhathesaidwastrue.myspineignited.thismanwasserious
andsuddenlyiwasafraid.
Jthenturnedtome,asifknowingwhatifelt,thenheasked,"sowhataboutthatspaceport?"

10/18/07 01:23 am - loophole de la blues.
"youfindsomethingelsetodo,travelingman."
thevoicecamenearoverhead,realizingtheniwasslumpedonthebar.
vaguely,irecalledthewatchtowermakerdoingthesame.
hadibecomehim?toomuchfatigueafterbuildingthetowertowatchnothing?
washedrainedasthetowerfellwithnoonetohearorseeitdoso?
didthetowerexistthen?
"thestonesaregone,man...thevisitorsaregone..."
itwasthebarkeep.smokingwhateverpoisonwasleftbehindbytheothertravelers.
"theytookthedeadsleepingladytoo,andthechildhadtobesedated."
wait..."icouldnotdigestallofthis,iraisedmyheadoffthetable,theweightinmyhead,staggering.
"slipyouthepillstheydid.tooscardeof'cha,butiain't."hewasalmostslurring.stumblingbehindhis
bar.
"igottakeepyoucompanytillthenewstonesturn..."
"leaveeverystoneunturned"camethethewhisperfrommythroat.
notagoodsign.everystoneunturnedandistillhaven'treachedtheplaceofnight.
mytravels.wherediditbringme?memoryseemedtobestolenfromme.iknowtherewasawomanin
apicture...buticouldnotfinditanymore.
thewallwasempty,partofitrippedbadlybutstillstanding.
"theytookherportraittooman....likeaneffigy...theysaidthey'dburnitwhenthestationlands."
irecalltalkofaspaceport.ofathingcalledAZA.ifocusedmyeyesaroundthepubdelablues.
nooneelsebutmeandawastedbartender..
thisisn'tright.
"youknowwhat'snotright,travelingman?"
washereadingmymind?
"theytookyourbags.andyourbooks.
157

thatwokemeupgood..
itriedstumblingoutofmybarstoolbutfelloverintohotliquidsquirmingonthefloor.
iseemedtohearparrots,yellingunintelligiblestuff.
"fuck"
"noswearwordsintheblues,brother."
everythingwasturningtoslush.toshit.isuddenlyrecalleddreamingofthesea
anditwasturningtosludge.andthewoman.thewomanwasthereandhersilencewasgreaterthana
death.
itwasgapingandruthlessandsharpattheedgeslikeanopenfrozendeadmouthofabeast.
disorientationhitmebad.icouldnotstandup..icouldnotreallymove.theweightinmyheadgreater.
thevoicehovered,"forsafekeepingtheysaid...yourbooksimean.toomuchrespectforoneofyour
books,maybetwo.theykeptwhisperingoutthenamestoeachother...didn'tknowyouwerealibrarian.
maybeyoushouldstartanownhouse,themshelveswoulddoyourbooksmightygood,maybeeven
"shutup.shutup,letmethink."itwasnteasy
theparrotswerelouder,andcranesturningwiththatmechanicalhum.treeswerefalling.shadows
movingoverhead.
"thedoorisgonetravelingman.thewindowsaregonetoo.thisismyden,idonthavetogoanywhere,
butyou.myfriend,you."hepausedforeffect.
"arestuckhereforawhile."
icouldnotbattletheweight.
myheadhitthewarmliquidonthefloor.andthenahorseneighednearby,childrenwerelaughing.
morewarmliquidrainedonme.

gone.
10/18/07 01:39 am - journals pf manuel, the barkeeper.
pubdelabluessurfacedabouttwoyearsintotheinfancyofoceanfrictional.
thatfamed,mythicalclubbytheshoresofafrioca.
backthen,theshoresdidn'thaveaname.
itsfounder,ajestergodd/DJwastoocaughtupinthepainoflovelosttonoticetheneedfornaming
things.
itwaslongbeforetheshorewasnamedwhenthepubdelabluesrose.
thiswasandstillisaplaceofgreatmisery.
theblues,eversocharminglyarticulatedbytheblacksonsomefarmlandorriverbank,wasinitspurest
essencehere
wifeleavingforanothercowboy
horsesdying,landdryingup
thegreatdepressionkickinginwiththedust.thiswastheplacethesufferersgoto
hanginguptheircrossesbythedoorforashitatthebarandthecomputertonotedownthelosses.
archived.likeakashic.
hundredsandthousandsoftravelerscamehereaftersomethingwasgone.
thiswasaresting,mournfulplacewiththemusictomatch.croonersfromallformsofabysmalplaces
158

settleddowntocapturethemoodoftheclientlesthatday
massive,godlikechannelingmoaningoutcosmictragedy
whenworldsendedtheysang
whencastlesfelltheysang
whenwomenlefttheysang
whenmendied,theysang
andtheyneverfailedtonothaveanaudience.
notuntiltonight.whenonlyonemanisleft.
Ercondus,thetraveler.
passedoutonthegrainyfloorcoveredinpiss,
deaftotheabsentmaidenandhersoaringmelancholicdestroyervoice.
thevisitorsaregone.
toagreaterplaceoffailureitseems.
thewallshowsnoblackstones.
somethinghadended.somethinghadbegun
andonlywhentherecounts31stonesonthebluewall
wouldthenameofthisnewfoundterrorberevelation'd
rest.regroup.
red.

159

Movement3

160

Post 1000. 100

161







infilthbethemeaningofpurity.

162

ONTHEPROLIFICHALLUCINATIONOFOMANDAEMANHATTER

TranscribedbyNINE

MymastersnameisOmandae,andIamhisservant,Nine.Ihavebeeninhisserviceforthelasttwo
years.Bythetimethistomeisdone,IwillnolongerbehisservantandhewillnolongerbeOmandae
Manhatter.

ItisthemorningofthetwentyseventhofNovemberandthetimeoffulfillingmymasterslastwillis
closeathand.Twentysevennightsago,mymasterslippedintooneofhisperiodiccomas.Wehad
spentthepriorelevenmonthspreparingforthisendeavorandIamrequiredtospendthenextseven
pagesexplainingtheeventsthathaveleduptothisnight.

Imetmistermanhattertwoyearsago,inthewinteroftwothousandfive,onanislandsouthofthecity
ofglass.IrecallthenighthavingnomoonandthecafIwaswritingatwasdesertedatthattimeof
twilight.Ihadrecentlycompletedafourmonthghostwritingcontractforanavantgarderadioproducer
andwasalreadytwomonthspastmyperiodofrest.Nojobswerecomingmywayandaphaseof
desolationwasabouttosetin.IdecidedIneededabreakfromtheglasscityandtookaboattripacross
totheislandofghnasuinsearchofisolation.Ispentthenexttwonightstherewanderingtheislands
owndistricts.IspentthefirstnightatThewhorehousesthatoverlookedthenorthernsideofthesea
whiletheopiumdensandmorphinehousesIvisitedthenextdayoverlookedtheeasternocean.In
betweenwerelongstretchesofrundownshacks,abandonedautomobileswithoutwheels,vacant
outdoorcinemaswiththescreensstandingsentinellikeflagsofadeceasednationandemptygasoline
stationswhichIhadspentonenightin.
AsIroameduphillthatblackmorning,Inoticedthebonfireinanabandonedstable.Highaboveit,in
thestillnightlikeskiesofthatwintersmorning,Isawtheorangestarstandwatchlikeasatellite.
SomethinginsidemebademetowalktowardstheburninglightandIdid.Bysomecosmicforce,the
starhaddrawnmeonwardstoOMANDAE.

Ifoundhimnakedandsittingcrossleggedinacircle.Hisstomachwasbloated,likeastarvingAfrican
child,andhewasbald.Thereweresignsonhisforeheadandatthecentre.Hewouldlatergoonto
showmethethirdsignatthenapeofhisneck.andwhattheoraclehathsaidhathcometrue.Were
hisfirstwordstome.thewritingmanwillcomebythefirstdarklightsofwinter,Shehadsaid.andnow
youarehere.
163

Hisstrangepowerstillhadmeinhisgripwhenhefirstnamedme.youarenowcalledNINE.Hesaid.
andyouwillpreparewithmeforagreattaskahead.Byyourhand,Iwillbringbackthelostfuturemyth.
Byyourhand,Iwilltelllmytale.

AndthatwashowIbeganlifewithOmandae.

Solitudeandwordsweremyonlytruecompanions.EveryoneelseIcameincontactwithwerevessles,
passingpointsalongmyisolatedjourneys.Theyprovidedthevistaofwordswhichkeptmecompany
throughthelongernightsofbeingalone.Intrinsically,omandaehadknownthisandheexplainedthat
thiswaswhyhechoseme.theothersarestilltoocaughtupinthisworldtowriteabouttheworlds
outsidetheirframeofreference.Hetoldme.Ispentagreatdealoftimeduringourfirstmeetingjust
sittingwithhimalthoughIsatoutsidethecircle.Iwasfascinatedbythespectrebeforeme.sometimesI
wouldfeellikeIwasinadreamwithhim.Sometimeshewouldfadeawayasifhewasanold
photograph.Theincenseheburntboreahypnoticeffectonme.realityandotherowrldlinesskept
intertwining.OnourfirstnightIvaguelyrememberhimgettingthebasicthingsoutoftheway.Hedug
upabundleofoldmoneywhichcouldstillbeusedintheglasscity.everythingisyours.Hesaid,but
youaretolastthroughoutourjourneytogether,whichwilltakenomorethantwoandahalfyears.
MaybeevenlessforIfearImayunderestimateyou.hewentontotellmeofmyduties.listen.learn.
documenteverythingthatImustsay.Keepusaliveandsafe.Keepusisolated.Meetthoseonlymost
criticaltothetasks.Keepusalive.Hewouldgoontoremindmeeverynowandthenaboutkeepingus
alive.AndatfirstIthoughtitwasaboutbasicsurvival.Foodandwarmthandshelter.Butitwouldgo
ontobesurvivalinotherworldsweshared,otherworldshewouldtakemetowheneverhechoseto
bringme.thereismuchtolearn,hekeptrepeatingintheearliesttodays.thereismuchtoseeand
understand.

Hebeganlifehereinarundownstable,withmebringingcansoffoodandusedtowelsforwarmth.He
didnotspeakasmuchthefirstthreeweeksashewouldinthemothsthatwastocome.Heonlysaid
thathehaddiedandwasstilldyingatthesametime.Thatheneededtoslowlynourishhimselfback
intothestate.Andthatthesicknesswillevolveashebecamemoreevolvedwithme.Hewaslikea
homelessman,lostforhundredsofyears,andfinallyfindingshelterattheendofhisharrowing
sleeplessjourney.Butanotherjournethadbegunwithme.Ibelieve,lookingback,thatItrustedhim
becausepartofmewasinhimandpartofhimwasinme.wes[entamonthtogetherinthat
abandonedstable.AllthewhileIhaddinedandworkedandsleptoutsidehiscircleandhewouldnot
leaveitforlongperiodsoftime.Heexplainedtomethatitwashishealingspaceandthatwhenhewas
mademorereal,hewouldeventuallyleaveit.Ididntunderstandwhathemeantthenbutaswe
164

enteredoursecondmonthofcontract,Istartedtobuildknowledgeofthismanwhohasbecomemuch
ofamythtome.

Onthelastnightinthestable,heinstructedmetoburnmyclothesandofferedmealongwrapover
robe,dugupfromthegroundwithinhiscircle.Itwasanactthatreinformedthecontract.Iwasnowhis
highhighpriestandthemonthofjustsittingwithhim,listeningtohissporadingtalkaboutpreparing
themindandspiritforthetasksaheadwaspast.webeginournextphasewithmovement.Hedonned
hisduguprpbe,tookhissmallbagwithhistowel,tincupandthreegreystonesandwalkedoutofhis
circleandthestablewhichwasnolongerhishome.

Januarysecond,2007.

Weheadedwest,barefoot,liketheasceticsofold.Nohungerbotheredusaswespentthefirstfew
hoursincompleteslice.Ifollowedalittlewaybehindhim,walkinginhisfootstepsashehadinstructed
metodoso.Wewereheadingtowardsthegeneralldirectionoftheshoreandtowardsthecityofglass.

thenexyplaceiswherewewilldomostofourwork.Hetoldmeasweuntiedthewoodenboat
slappingitselfagainstavacantpier.Ibelievethatsomekindofarrangementhadbeenmadelongbefore
Imethimandtheboatwaswhereitwasmeanttobeatthatpointinspaceandtime.Irowedusout
towardsthecityasOmandaetoldmeitshistory.

asupermodernglassandelectrictreethatgrowsoutofancientlifegivingsoilshapedbyprimalevents.
Thatisthenatureoftheglasscity.Thetimewillsooncomewhenwewillreapandeatofitsfantastic
fruitsandbringourselvestotheforefrontofitsnextrungofconsciousness.

Thecityisneveradeadthing.Hekeptremindingme.itlivesandbreathesandgrowswithitsdenizens.
Evolutioniseveroccurring.Hetaughtmeabouthowthewillsandactionsofthepeoplegavethe
energiesofthecityitsdirection.Howeachandeverydreamandfocusedthoughtshapesthepath
whichwhichthecitywillfollow.Sometimes,thecitywilloverwhelmthepeopleandshape,inturn,the
directionswhichtheywouldtake.Anunendingdance,aconstantexchangeofinformation,anever
movingentity.Hewentontoexplainhowdifferentplacesholddifferentpathstodifferentpowerslike
thatofleylinesandriverarteriesoftheearth.

165

Afogwouldsweepinandoutofourpathandsometimes,thebrightlightsofthecityaheadwould
vanishandiwouldfindmyselfrowingusoutinthemiddleofnowhere.Healwaysassuredoursafetyand
keptrepeatingthatoftentimes,beingslosesightoftheirshores.Hethenstartedtalkingaboutthe
responsibilityofcertainpeopleandhowtheirhandswouldshapethefuturehistoryofcertainlivesand
destinies.Ihadoftenthought,inthebeginning,thatOmandaemaybesufferingfromaseverekindof
messiahcomplexandponderedthepossibilitiythathemightjustbesufferingfromdelusionsof
grandeurebutIhadoftentooaccusedmyselfofsuchactsandbeingwithsomeonethatinaway
mirroredmyself,Iusedmybondwithomandaeasameansforreinforcingmybondwithmyroleinthis
life.Outthereuponthewaters,rowingtowardsthecityofglass,IIrenewedmyvowstothiscourseI
hadchosentofollow.

Thelastquarterofourjourneyacrossthecalmblackseaofnightwasspentinsilenceandcontemplation
ofourlives,insecretandinmemories.

Aswenearedtheshore,Isawthattherewasataxiwaitingforusbytheharbor.Therewerenoother
boatsaround,whichwasunusual.Iaskedomandaeaboutthetransportationthatseemtobethere
everytimeweneedit.

wearenowlivingintheghosttimeofthecity.Hestarted,intheghosttime,onlywhatwerequireis
presentandreal.Everythingelseisasleep.thefigureofotherboatsandpeople,thesymbolsof
nocturnallife.Theydonotexistinourownprivateghosttime.Thattaxidriverthere,smokinginhis
brightAcapulcoshirtandsafarihat,existsforourneedsonly.Hewillnotbehereifitwasanyother
person.Youwilllearnthatnoteveryonewillseeus.Onlythosewhoaremeanttoseeusinour
phantomhours.thesmokingtaxidriveropenedthedoorforuswithoutaword.Hethendroveusto
ourresidenceforthenexttwoyears.

Theresurrectioncrisismotelisrealtoonlythosewhobelieveittobe.Itisfortheworkersandthe
dwellersandtravelersoftheotherworldsthatvibratesandexistssonicallyandmythicallyonanother
frequencytothatofearthreality.Whatweexperiencehereashumansisonlyonespectrumof
thousands,possiblymillionsofotherspectrumsofexistence.itsanexistentialradarwave,abliponthe
vast,unendingscreenofthemultiverse.

Itwasstrangetoreturntothecityafteralittlemorethanamonthawayfromit.Asifthesoulhad
returnedtoabodythathadchanged,albeitalittle.Adjustingtofitintothenewisaregularlyoccurring
actinthecityforthecityalwayschanges.Theloudnessofthenewyearwasstillringingbutgetting
166

fainterbythedays.Therewerenewcampaignsonthestreetscreens,therewereacouplenewshops
alongthedistricts.Thetheatredistrictsscreenednewartfilmsanddocumentaries.Thenightclubs
playednewmusic.Therewerenewfacesonthestreets.

thistime,twoyearsfromnow,wemaynolongerbehere.Ortheplacewillnolongerbehere.Itisin
ouractsthatwilldeterminewhichitwillbe.

WeturnedintowhatirecognziedastheATONdistrictoftheglasscity.Thefringedistrictofthesocuiial
consciousnessthatwastheglasscity.Thisiswheretheshadowofthegreatmonumentofprogresswas
cast.Thiswasthegutandbowelsofthebeast.

Ivehadoccasionaldealingsinthispartofthecity.Threeyearsago,Ighostwritthelifeofaprostitute
namedmarianwhowoulddisappearclosetoayearafterourcontracthadended.Sheletmesleepwith
heronseveraloccasionsduringthe15daysIwaswithher.

Therewasalsoanoccasiononcewheniwascontractedbythedistrictssoothsayer,ghos~haus,to
documentasanceinwhichaspiritwantedtonarrateitswartimelifetohisstilllivingwife.

Ibelieve,fiveyearsago,Iwascontractedbyadrugdealerwhowantedmetochroniclehisaddiction
curveduringaperiodhecalledthedarkserpentine.Mymemoriesandfeelingsweremixedinthis
districtthatseemstohaveadeeptwistedlifeofitsown.Ihadoftenfeltmostathomehereandwas
gladtobespending24monthsofmylifeinit.
Wereachedtheressurectioncrisismotelatatimewhenthestreetwalkerswerelessandmostofthe
denizenswereasleeporworkingintheprivacyoftheirownhomes.Itfeltlikeithadbeenherefor
centuries,withanarchitecturefarremovedfromthesupermodernismofthecitythatlayoutsidethis
satellitetown.Themaindoorswerestillmadeofdarkwoodandopenedonrustedhingesthat
shouldvedroppedofyearsago.Inside.Itwasdimanddustywithanairthickwitholdmemoriesand
events.Themotelkeeperhimselfseemedagedbeyondreason.Hisgreywrinkledfacedwasetchedwith
numerouslinesofhistories.Hiseyesweregreyanddeepandtimeless.Hehandedmeakeywitha
yellowtagwiththenumber11onit.toplevel.WastheonlytwowordsIheardfromhimthatdayand
themonthstocome.Hisdevotiontosilencewasmonumental.

167

Therewasanoldpowerleftbehindinourroom.Icouldfeelitanditseemedtobecomingfromthe
greatmirrorthatstoodnexttothewindowoftheroom.Thereweretwobeds,ashareddressingtable
withanothermirror,anemptybookshelfandacornerstandfortheorangelamb.therewasonlyone
chairandoneplaindarkwoodclothescupboard.Wetookoursleeponthefirstdayattheresurrection
crisismoteandsharedmyfirstdreamwithomandae.

Thefirstdream

Iwasanisland.Omandaewasanisland.Betweenusagulf,alargebodyofblackwater.Thetideswere
strong,theundercurrentruthless.Icouldseeomandaesshorefrommyown,asifIwaspartofthetree
staringahead.Isawcreatures,likebigcatsandlargeanacondalikesnakesandmammothsfromtheice
age,walkingdowntheshoretowardsthewater.Iunderstoodtheywereaspectsofomandae,his
knowledgeandhislife,histhoughtsandemotionsandaspirations.Thecreaturesswamfirst,outand
awayfromtheshoretowardsmine.Thentheysankbeneaththewaves.Itriedfeelingfortheminthe
water,astheseawasalsoconnectedtomyshore.iknewtherewasanabyssbetweenus,thatweshared
thatabyss.Isensedthecreaturesmovingtowardsme.Ifeltthemsurfacingandmyknowledgeofthem
becamestrongerastheyclosedin.theycreptuntomelikeinsectsonaparalysedman.Ifeltthemslither
andcrawlandstompuntomyshores.Theymadeloudanimalisticnoises.Theyroaredonarrival.The
wholeislandofmewasfilledwiththesecreaturesandthedintheymaderosetothecanopyofmy
fortress.

Thenthecreaturesspoketome.thebigcatstothetrees,themammothstotherocks,thesnakestothe
holesinmyground.TheyeachspokeaperculiarlanguageandIunderstooditonvariouslevels.They
hadcomefromomandaeandwasnowatnine.Thelinkhasbeenmade,sharedbytheabyss.Antsbroke
outofmyskinandImyheartslowlystoppedbeating.Awindblew,thewavescrashed,cloudsofnight
andsuncrowdedoverhead.Metallicspiresandstructuresroseoutofmyislandbody.Liketheearth
havingmultipleerections.Rocksturnedintocomputers,computingthedatatheantsbroughtforth
fromthewaters.Dragonflysandbeetlesswarmedtheislandofme,settledinmybushesandvalleysand
gardens.Scorpionsandrattlessnakesdominatedthedesertsofmybody.Eachinsectandanimaland
beinghavingapowerofitsown,andtheydefecatedintomygrounds,sinkingdeepintomyisland,
changingit,fertilizingit,transformingit.

WhenIwokeupthebediwasonhadbeenshiftedsothattheheadwasbacktobackwithomandaes
bed.Istaredupattheceilingandtheceilingstaredbacklikeamirror.Icouldseeourshadows,ourtwo
168

headsalmostconjoined,liketwocorpsesinarow,handsfoldedonthechest.Thesunwasalreadyrising
quicklyintheresurrectionmotel/

BOOK1

GHOS`HAUSANDTHEBOOKOF1000.100

169

Thelastcustomerleftalittlepast2inthemorning.Troublewithatransvestitelover.Thecardsdidnot
enditwell.Therewillbenosleepforthetwoofthemtonight.Ipackedupthedeck,theceremonial
cloths.Closeduptheshop.Ihadbeenawakefordaysandcouldnolongerrestwellenough.Icouldfeel
theburdenofabreakdowncoming.Intotal.Inbrutal.InthedarkIsmokedacigarette.Inthedark,I
consideredmovingagain.Thiscitywasgettingtome.theshopofpsychicwonders;theghos~hausasits
knownislosingallthecharm.Thecrystalballsaregettingfoggy.Thereistoomuchscienceand
commerceinthiscity.MysticismissickandI,withit.InthedarkIpouredthewhiskey.Anoccasional
vehiclewouldgoby,lendinglighttothesmallshopthroughthewindows.Thengone.Idrankupstraight.
Roomtemperatureintoxication.Ipouredanotheronejustbecause.Therewaslittlemoneyandlifeleft
here.Nootherreasontoseesunlightuponthesamestreets.TherewouldbealottopackifImove.The
giftsItookfromcustomersinsteadofmoneyamountedtotoomanytrunksfull.Coinsandbraceletsand
clocks.Boxesofchildhoodtoysandmirrorsandemptycabinetsofmemories.Itookpartsofaspiral
stairwell,ofacaravan.Bicyclesandpiecesofboat.Stackedagainstwallswereoldworldrecordsand
compactdiscsandbooks.Theseweretheitemsmostabundant.Icouldchangebusinessforawhile.
Turnintoaminibookcummusicstore.Icouldrentlpstobedroomdeejaysbecomeathriftstoreof
personalitemsofpowerforotherstrangers.Changethewebofpowerinthiscity.Lettheconsumer
keeptheshopkeeperscoins.Letthemandreamthesmallgirlsdream.Letthetyranthavethedressofa
maid.Letthechildlessagedmotherknowagrandchild.Sellundergarmentstoperverts.Ilitanother
cigaretteinthedarkandthoughtofthesethings.Scaringmyself,amusingmyself.Aimlesswanderingsof
amindtooimmortaltofindsomethingnewandworthytounderstand.Thecigarettemademethirst.
Anotherdrinkinthedark.Astormwouldcomebutitwashoursaway.Thenightalwaysseemedtoo
short.Ithoughtaboutsettingoutagain.Insearchfor,perhapsanothermysticalchild.Butthethoughtof
theentireinitiation,ofthatprotracted,tiredsearchingconvincedmenotto.Ithoughtofvisitingtheold
places.Toconvenewitholdghosts,buttheworldbeyondwasoftentedious.Restlesssoulswhoclung
toomuchtoyourcare.Iconsidereddreamwalkingamongthestreetwalkers.Todosomedrugswiththe
whoresbuttheroadofonanwastoonearandthewhoresweretooanxioustoendtheirnightswithout
burningout.Withoutthought,Ifoundmyselffinishingafewmoreglassesofwarmwhiskey.Ihadrun
outofcigarettes.OnlyfifteenminuteshavepassedsinceIclosed.Myheadwasgrowingtooheavybut
Restwouldnotcomeforsure.soIturnedonthelightsagain,unlockedthedoorandcalledthe24hour
grocersforapackofredsandafreshbottleofwhiskey.Iwrappedmyringdarmwiththeloinclothof
artusandsunkbackintothechariotchair.Mythroatwasburning,myeyeshotwheneverIclosedthem.
Thebellsatthedoorrangasitopened.Thebreezemadethewindchimesdancesoftly.ALbuthe
storekeeperofthenightpassedmetheliquorandthecigarettes.Ipaidhimwithblessings.Allowedhis
dreamstobehappyandhisdrivingdayslessstressful.Heleftquietly.Anothernocturnepayingrespects
tothosewhodonotsleep.Idimmedthelightsofghos!hausalittleandpouredmyselfadrink.By3a.m
thebottlewashalfgoneandIwasheavilyintoxicated.Itwasgettinghardtoseeandtheitemscluttering
thestorefeltmorerestless,likepowertrapped,needingrelease.Ithoughtofafireengulfingtheplace.
Howmuchwillbelost,willbereturnedtothesourceofallthings?Thesoundofthebellsdistractedme.
thedoorwasopening.Iscarcelyrealizedithadstartedtorain.Atallmanwiththickandlonggreyhair
camein,halddrenched.Iapologizeiftherainwatershallwetyourcarpethesaid.Hisaccentseemed
britishbutoftheolderworld.Ihopeyoureopen?Therainisgettingheavierandyouweretheonly
onewithalighton.IwasntsureifIshouldturnhimaway.thestormwillbegreaterinawhile,I
170

slurredslightly,bettertostayifyouhavenoplacetogo.thankyou.hesaid,puttinghisrugged
brownbriefcasenexttoaglassgnomeonthefloor.Icanpayyouforyourshelter,hesaidtakingoff
hiscoat.Isensedsomekindofpowervibratinginhispresence.notalkofpaymentifnoserverciseare
rendered.Itoldhim.oh?whatareyourservicesthen?perhapsIcouldusesomething,orpurchase
somethingfromyourhostofitems.theghost~hausisofthetarot,andmorerarethesaulaarts.Both
aremirrorsforthesoul.Onemoreconventional,theotherquitenot.Sances,magickalobjectsand
spellcastingarealsopoweredbymyname.Perhapssomethingforyourprotection?Allmagichasa
price.hmm.Hecontemplated,walkingaroundalittle,lookingatalltherandomobjectsonshelves
andtables.whatwouldatravelerneedmost?heasked.maybeasafepassage.Herbsperhapsto
easethewearinessofthefeet.Idugaroundmydrawerfromthemaintable,lookingforabundleof
poisonedflowersfromtheGA.couldIofferyouadrink?nothankyoumyfriend,itisfartoolatefor
metodrink.andnottoolateforyoutotravel?theladthatbroughtmeherewasaslowdriver.Too
tiredheexplainedbuthewouldnotrest.Bythetimehedroppedmebythemainsofthiscity,itwas
alreadytwo.Anhourswalkorsoanditbegantorain.Isthereamotelabouthere?one.Butitsunder
renovationsonopatronsforafewweeks.Thereisaninntwostreetsup.Icanshowyouthewaywhen
therainstops.thankyoumyfriend.Iproducedasmallwrapoftheblackflowers.perhapsIcould
interestyouinthese.Smokedinaleafrollorapipe.Takesawaythefatigueoflongwalking.Makestime
lessoftheessence,soitwouldseemnotsolongbeforeyoureachyourdestination.
hetookthepacketfromme,andhelditclosetohisnose.ah,theflowersbytheriverGA.Iwas
surprised.youarewelltraveledIsee.Ihavebeentoafewplaces.Whatisthecostofthis?youpay
whateveritisyouwish.Evenamemoryyouwishtoleavebehind.Isaid.Helookedatme,youwould
notjusttakemoney?moneyisfine,fortheeverydayworld,butmemoriesarebetter,castintoobject
ofapersonalnature.Somethingyouwishtoforget,youcangiveittome,andiwillmakeyounotrecall
itagain.Everyonehassomethingtoforget.Ipouredanotherglassofwhiskeyashethoughtaboutit.
Hefinallyspokeagain,perhapsyoucanhelpmedecide.Ihavecomeintopossessionofabook,givento
mebeforeIdepartedonmytravels.Iwastobringittomantwocitiesbeforethisonebuthadfound
himlongdeceasedwithnoapparentkin.Thewomanwhogaveittome,insistedthatIshouldnotreturn
withthebook.Nolibraryorusedbookstorewouldtakeitfortheauthorisobscureanditscontents
evenmoreso.Wouldyoutakeitfrommefortheseflowers?showmethebook.Isensedthatthis
wasthereasonthemanappearedhere,fornooneentersthehausofghosfornoreason.Heunlocked
hisoldbagandbroughtoutthebookwrappedinblackclothandtiedwithredstrings.Therewasan
uneasinessinthemanseyesashepassedittome,Iassuredhimthatitwasalright,thatIwouldreturn
ittohimifIfeltthatheshouldnotpartwithit.Itookthebookandimmediatelyfeltitspower.Apower
somewhathalffinished,halfcreated.Isawimagesthen.Ofatowerrisinginabrokenlandscape.Of
deformedstatuesandagatheringsociety.Isawchildrenindeathcamps.Beautifulwomenonstage
takingofftheirleotards.Isawasadladyplayingthepiano,singingaboutabortedbabies.Isawa
mountain.Iwilltakethisbook.Itoldthevisitor.andwithit,Igrantyouasafepassagethroughthree
morecitiesafterthis.thebookmustbeofsomevalueforsuchanofferinghesaid.Ijustnoddedmy
head.Ishallfindthetrueownerofthisbook,ofnot,itstrueauthor.Itakeitfromyourhandsandlifein
exchangeforwhatIoffer.Willyouacceptthis?threecitiesworthofsafetyismorethanablessingin
thistimeandage.Hesaid,Iacceptyouroffer.Anexchangewasmadeintheghoshausthenightof
thestorm.Beforelong,therainsbegantosubside.Asifithadcometowitnesstheexchangeandwas
171

departingfortheacthasbeenfinished.Thetraveleracceptedafarewelldrink.Bythenmyintoxication
hadburnedatanotherfrequency.Theearlymorninglightbegantoshowandhourshadpassed
unusuallyquick.Sometimes,timebecametwistedinthehausofghos.Sometimes,cosmicthingsbegin
andendhereandasmytravelerbidfarewellandcontinuedhisjourney,Isensedthatarenewalhad
occurred,andthattherewasonemorethingthehausofghoshadtodobeforeitstimeinequatecity
wasdeemedover.

AtthebackofGHOSHAUSTRADINGwerethechambers,hiddenbehindbamboostiltsandpearls
hangingfromtheceilingwastheroomofprayerandrecovery.Intheheatofearlymorning,Isank,
nakedintothecoolingwell.Thewatersofthedeepthatranintoearth,washedawaythesweatand
convulsionofthebodyoverworkingwithalcholandtobaccoandwildblackflowersnarcotia.Isankinto
thedarkofthewell,thewatersdeafeningmyearsandonceagainIfeelasfatherfelt.Thedeaf
enchanterofATONstreet.Beneaththeduskwaters,Iheldmybreathasmotherdid.Shewhospoke
withthedead,shewhodidnotbreathetobeonewiththosewhobreathenomore.Generals,kings,
thievesandboys.Intheirghastlystateshespokewiththem.Shebroughtmessagesandsentlongings.
Shewastheshamanessinaworldnecroandfunereal.ThroughthemIamrenewed.Forthiswasthe
hausemyparentsbuilt.Thiswasthetrade,formedinthebloodofmykin.Consumedbythewell,Ifeel
therushofthestoreabove.Themagnitudeofmemoriesandchasms,spellsandsymbolsandsigns.The
lifeofthetwodecks,oftarotandsaula.Theplacewhichthespiralstarcasetakesyou,theweightofthe
booksandthephonographicmysteries.Thecenturiesofvisitors,seersandmadmen.Theebbandtide
ofhumanitymovingthroughthestoresinsuspendedtime.Itallrushedintomelikethedesperateneed
forair.Aragingoccurredinmyearsandinmyhead.Theheartreadytoexplode.Stomachtwisting,a
blackholebeginsinsideme.Ibreakthroughthewellofwaterlikearupture.InaninstanceIseethe
holographicmap.Acalendarfilledwithbigredants.Iseethespiderwomanandtheblacksandcircles
shesitson.mynakedhandclawstheslimestonesofthewell.Istareup,almostasifshockedbythe
edgedofdeath.Irealizethattheactisover.Abovethereisacircleofblurredlight.Likeasun.likea
floatingsphere,aglowingeye.Iamcalledtoit.Ifeelcoldintheheat.Thebodyiswellagain..exhausted
butreinstated,Isprawlontheconcreteflooroutofthewell.Mynakedformexposedintheorangelight,
Iclosemyeyesandalmostremembersleep.Istruggletotheothersideofthechamber.Isitcross
leggedandnakedbeforetheheadofthemammoth.Throughitsdeadeyes,Iseekouttheroute.The
waywhichImusttakewiththeweightofthebookonmyshoulders.
Thefirstcustomersoflatemorningsoughtseedsandwalkingsticks.Onesoughtamulets.Forloveand
forhealth.Itookcoffeeandhardcheesebreadwithaboymusicianwhotradedambientcassettetapes
foracomiconmusicandmagic.AtlunchIdidareadingforacheerleaderwhowantedtoturnher
dancingintoart.IturneddowntherequestforasancebecauseIneededtoconservemyenergyformy
travelslateroninthenight.Bytwo,IlockeduptheshopanddecidedtoreadalittlefromthebookIhad
acquired.AsIuntiedtheredstringsthatheldtheblackclothtogether,ThemirrorofARAatthebackof
thestoreglimmeredlikesomeonehadshotlightintoit.Itwasasignthatthebookhadmorethanone
origin,thatitbelongedtomorethanoneplace.Icouldsmellthedustofthepastandthecoldairofthe
futureasIunwrappedit.Thebookhadahardblackcover,madepossiblyfromahardorganicsubstance,
172

likenailsorbones.Therewasasigilonthecoverandnothingelse.Twosmallinesandfivecircles
arrangedintoamagickalsign.IdidnotrecognizeiteventhoughIrememberedhundredsofsymbols
fromtheyearsofstudyingsigns.Itoucheditandimmediatelycoldgreywallstouchedmeback.Imoved
myhandawayquickly,suddenlyfearingwhatImaybecomeifIheldthesignfortoolong.Iopenedthe
bookslowlyafterIhadcastaprotectionspelluponthehauseandmyself.Onthefirstpagewasan
invokation.

Bytheriseoftheneu-hauses
TheorthodoxofvaultMisend
BythestoneofmadameAVO
Comesthehourofpayment
WherethoseshamanicshallchannelITA
Speakingintonguesprofoundwithdire
Upholdingthestage
forrebmecedsdoom
leadingbackhome
ourlostsonofAIFI

Icouldnotunderstandthereferencesandthenames,butknewthemtobepowerful.Neithermyfather
ormotherhadspokenofsuchthingsandIrecallnoneofmyaquaintencesinthesocietieshaving
mentionedthem.Iturnedthepageagainandfoundahalfcompletetableofcontents.

Invocation---page1

Introductionpage.5
Reviwpage6

Book1.incidences.Chapters1-5,chapters1.1-1.2
173

Book2

OfthemysteriesofFar7andthedelieverencesforFAR
Onthesubjectofappearances.Analteredviewoftheshore
onobediencetothevoiceofFAR
beingthefirstmentionofthelostbeing
parthistories.ThevaultofM.

book3

1000.100chapters100-96

witnessofImmanuelgrant

endreview.page10

IpouredmyselfsomeEnglishteathenfoundthattheintroductionhadnotyetbeenwrittenyetfive
pageshavebeenkeptblankforit.Onthesixthpageitbegan.

Review

1
Theblackstonesonthewoodwallhadrearrangeditself.Thirty-onestonesinthesignofonethousand
onehundred,VaultMandtheREDpyramid.Thedoorsandwindowsinpubdelabluesdidnotreappear
asitwaspromised.Thetimehadcomebutthetravelerstillcouldnotleave.Hehadalreadypackedhis
174

belongings.Hisdarkbootsandcoatalreadyon.Hesatinthedeepchairanddughispocketsforthepipe
andflowers.Hewasgrowinganxious.
Thebarkeeperspoke.Bestill,Ercondus.Thestonesmaynotbecomplete.
Thereare31thereJacques,31wasthenumbergiven.Thethreesignsverifiesthecompletion.Areyou
totellmethattheprinceswouldlie?
Theywouldnot.Notundermyhouse.
Thenwhereismydoor?
Thebarkeepcouldnotanswer.
Ercondus,thetraveler,lightshispipeandwaits.Likehehaddonesoforsomanyyears.

2
ThefuneralprocessionhadalreadystartedwhenJarrived,soakedinthestorm.Theviolenceofthe
windsandagoniesofthunder,louderthanthefuneralband,thefuneralchants,thefuneralbells.The
windsthreatenedtooverthrowthegreatglasscasketbutthewarriormenwhocarrieditwerestrong
andheldagainstthegales.ARRUKOisdoingthistoustheleaderofthewarriorsattheheadofthe
casketsaid.no.hisgeneralreplied,itisthegodswhoareangeredbythisunjustloss.The
processionhaditsfollowersbythehundredsandJwaslostinthecrowd.Heonlyknewtheywere
headingwest,tothesacredburialgroundsbeyondthecityandheknewthatifhedidnotreachthe
headoftheWarriorstodeliverthemessage,everyonewouldbekilled.J,thedrugdealer,wasrunning
outoftime.

3
BythegreatriverGAhefollowed.Burntinthesun,barefootandhardenedagainstthebleedingrocks
andsoil.Byhisright,thepoisonedflowersbloomed,itshypnoticauradancinginwavesintheheat.the
hotwindssearshisskinandhetriestoblotoutthepainbywatchingthebubblingblacksludgecreepby.
Thesunhadnotsetintwoweeks.Theearthwasdryandbreaking.Theworlddidnotturnaccordingto
thelawsofold.ButthegreatriverGAcrawledon.fromthegutofthemonsterORDARKtothewasteful
motherwoundofTIANAK,itcrept.TheblackserpentineriverofGA.Greatrockformationsroseahead,
toweringandjaggedandblack.Liketoweringsigns,warninghimoffthepathtotheplaceofnight.Inthe
burninghellofthesunandbythegreatriverGA,DECORUStheTHIRD,followed.

175

4
onthenightNicolewasabducted,onthenighthergrandparentswerekilled,shehaddreamtofthe
Bloatedman.
Shehadseenhisnaked,bloated,headlessbodydriftingbeforeherinspaceandassheturnedherhead
awayfromtheghastlysight,hisheadslowlyspuntowardsher.thebald,grotesqueheadmarkedby
threesigns.Of1000.100onhisforehead,ofthesigilofVaultMinthecentreandthepyramidatthe
napeofhisneck.Whitedeadeyesstaredatherasshescreamedinsilence.Hismouthopenedand
wormsandlightandsmokecameout.Thenitsaid,Iwillfindyou.anditwasthenwhenthemenhad
takenherinherroom.Longafterhergrandparentsforeighteenyearswerekilled.

detectiveElijahMonroejerkedoutofnarcolepticnightmareandalmostcrashedheadlongintoatruck.
Evenwiththetruckshighbeamswhiteandhotinhisface,hecouldnotblockoutthevisionhehad
beforehewastornfromit.Thevisionofayoung,nakedgirlbleedingtodeathfromhervagina.Hewas
coveredinsweatinthesuddenlystillcar.Adarkskinnedmancameoutthetruckandwalkedovertothe
driversside.Helookedinandsaid,WINGFARassuresyoursafety.Traveloncarefully.Thedriverthen
returnedtohistruck,theWINGFARcompanysignseemedtoglowredinthedarkagainstthewhite
background.AnupsidedownFrunningdownfromthecentreofaW.thetruckdroveawaybutthenear
accidentwasstillnotasstrongasthefaceoftheyounggirl.Anotheronewouldbekilledifhedidnot
stopthiskiller.

1.1

pubdelabluesisawaystatioon.Arestingplacebetweentheworlds.Threetwilightsago,ercondusthe
travelerhadarrivedtojointneotherguestsintheplaceofmisery.Itwasatimeofcertainmourning,
certainmiseries.
Agreatelderhadbeenkilled.Amysticalchildhadbeenabducted.Agreatsaintislostonhisjourneyand
abrokenmanhadfailedtostopanothermurder.Ercondushadfinishedhisseventhglassofwhiskeyand
stillthedoorsandwindowsoftheplacehadnotappeared.Thepubseemedtohaveshrunk,itsdark
woodenwallsappearedcloserandmorebarstoolsandtablesseemedtiohavevanished.Thestoneson
thewallchangedplaceseveraltimes,upsettingonlytheorderofthethreesignsandnotthesigns
themselves.Ercondustookittobesequential.Thatitwastellingastory.Eachsignthatappearedatthe
176

topwasthesigninmotionatthattime.Theconscioussign.Thenextsigninlinewassubconsciousand
thethirdwascosmic.Beneaththewavesofallconsciousness.

1.2

themenhadboundandgaggedNicolewithbarbedwire.Hardsharpwiresbitingintosoftskin.Her
tongueistrappedandcut.Hernakedform,cleanlyshavenbytheobesewitches.Soon,theywould
penetrateherbodywithmachines.Organicphallicthingsthatbreathesandmoves.Theywillsearchher
verybeingwiththeirmonstrocities.Alltofindthemythicalblackman.Thesorcererwhoisalsonamed,
ascended,hewhoisprayedfor.Intohervirginbody,themenwillprobe.Diggingintoaninnocentlife,
bytheorderofthegeneral.Thus,theyoungmysticchildsuffers.

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Thewhitefourteen-foottrucklurchedandgroaneddownstreet71.desertedandbarelylit,thestreet
leadAlbu,thedriver,andChung,hispartnerdowntotheriverERC.Thetruckwasbehavingabnormally,
radiostaticwasinterferedwithsecondsofoldChineseoperathentuneditselfintohauntingdrones
beforereturningtoastaticwithfaintvoicesamongthehiss.Chungkepthittingtheroof,hopingtoset
theantennaeworking.Thebangingscaredtheblacksparrowintherustcageanditflutterednoisily.its
nousealbusaid,suckingonhispipeofpoisonedflowers,itsthisroadwetake.Itfucksupthe
transmissions.Allsortsofsignalsconvergehere.ChungtriedtocoaxthebirdintoacalmandshotAlbu
aquestion.whatisMisterFARdoingthistime?Albulookedbackathim,caughtoffguard.you
shouldknowbetterthantotalkaboutMrFar.Heleanedincloser,Hehearsusyes?Nomatterwhere
weare
Chungcontemplatedthesewordsasthetruckcreptforward.
dontyoueverwonder?hebegan.
wonder?
aboutwhatwedo.Aboutthatwarehouse.Aboutthebosswehearbutneversee.
177

whatistheretowonderabout?Wedowhathesays,moneyappearsinourglovecompartmentwhen
allgoeswell.Andithasbeenwellright?
yeah,but.Allthemystery.Allthestrangethingswetransportaroundforhim.Arentyouevencurious
aboutwhatitsallabout?
itsnotourproblemChung.Evenifwetransportemptycoffins.Ahundredandelevenusedmonitorsor
piecesofwallfromahauntedhouse,itsnotourproblem.
but..
chung.Youasktoomuchquestions.Itllburdenyourmind.Trustme.letitgo.justdothejob,gohome
andspendyourmoney.Dontask.
Therewasahintofirritationandcommandinalbusvoice.Chungtookittobeanunwillingnesstoshare
whatheknows.Butalsoasignthatcertainthingsshouldntbetalkedabout.
alright,alright.Iwontbringthisupagain.Evenifwefindthatthecontainersofsandweleftatthe
warehousevanisheslikealltheotherothingswebringthere,Iwontaskaboutit.
good.Nowsmokeyourflowers,wevegotalongwaytogo.
theysatinsilence,driving.Arockriffburstthroughthestatic.Aquickandelectrifiedlick.Thengone.
Replacedbyababysvoice,recitinggibberish.Twinklingbells.Thenstaticagain.
Theskiesaboveswirledinthedarkesthuesofblack,purpleandred.Towardsthesouth,bluelight
flickered.Astormwashecticovertherebuttheairstillandchillingalongroute71.
acrosstheERChuh.Neverbeenintothatpartoftown.
neitherhaveIbutthereshouldbenoproblemwiththewaykeepers.
becauseMisterFarsayssoright?
Albulookedbackathisyoungercompanion.yes.Becausethebosssaysso.
Albuwasgettingconcerned.Itwasalwayslikethiswiththeyoungerones.Theywouldnotaskquestions
atfirstbutafterawhile,.Themysterywouldgettothemand,thoughwarnedagainstit,theywould
beginwondering.Theydbegingettingcuriousandiftheydidnotwatchtheirsteporquelltheirrestless
minds,theywouldoftengetintomoretroublethantheyhadeverimagined.ThathappenedtoAlbus
priorpartnerandthatlossensuredthatALbuwouldneverletapartnergettoocuriousagain.
Adeadtoneshutthehissout.Anemptydeadtonefilledthetruckandtheblacksparrowbeganitspanic
again.AsmogconsumedthestreetalmostsuddenlyandAlbuswitchedtohighbeams.
okbuckleup.Heordered.
178

Theheadlightscutthroughthesmog.Thetoneheightenedanotch.Avaguesenseofdestinationstarted
tobecomeclearasthetruckofWINGFARbrokethrough.Upaheadwerethetwostorey-gatesandthe
wallthatstretchedendlesslytothewestandeast.Itwastheendofthelineformosttravelers.ALbu
sloweddownashenoticedthearmedmilitarymen.Threeofthem,approachthetruck.Thesignof
WINGFAR,aredupsidedown;FrunningdownaWbeganglowingwithaneerielight.Chungflicked
ontheloudspeakersatthesideofthetruckandAlbuspokethroughthehandheld.BYTHELOGISTICS
OFFAR,MAKEWAYFORTHEVESSLE.BYTHEORDINANCEOFFAR,WEJOURNEYTHROUGH.FAR
WATCHES.FARWILLCOUNTYOURDEEDS.
ChungalwaysshiveredwheneverAlbumadetheannouncement.Itwasafeelinghecouldneverget
usedto.ThatstrangedreadasifitwasanotherbeingthatspokethroughthemouthoftheIndianman.
Whateverthisbeingssaid,hadtobeheeded.Thebirdappearedtohavegonesuddenlystillfromits
flutterings,asifthecommandofALbuhadsetitbackintopeace.Themilitarymensteppedaside,while
onereturnedtotheguardposttotriggeropenthegates.Ithadbeenyearssincethegateshadbeen
opened.YearssinceanyonehadgonethroughtotheothersideoftheriverERC.Albueasedthetruck
withitsunknowncargothroughthegatesandintotheplacewithnolight.

ThedruqdealerJandmotherDELUCIAstudied,theshoresoftheglasscityfromscoutship,
SARAPHAGIA.Abrutalwindwasblowingagainstthemandtheoceanwasrestless.Throughalien
carema,Jcapturedvisualsofthelandscapebeforehim,hopingtocatchtheformoftower71.Idont
knowifitsstillthere.Heshoutedtodeluciaoverthedinofthewinds.keeplooking!Thedoctortoldus
hecouldstillfeelitstanding.Itshouldbethere!thescalytentaclesofthealienthingsuckedharderat
hiseyesocketsashisfingersclickedonbonesthatshiftedaboutintheorganicbody.Asinglealieneye
twistedandturnedinitsowngrotesqueformasitworkedtoshapeformsthatJcouldsee.throughsuch
asight,Jmadeoutgreatcliffs,brokenandunstablerisingoutfromtheshoresofthecity.Deadtrees
floatedupsidedownandnakedclosetothegrounds.Thickgaseouscloudsseemedtoclingtothecliffs
andtheotheroddshapedformationsthatstuckoutoftheland.Therewereshapesofbuildings,half
bombedoutandothers,reshapingthemselvesagainstthewillandlogicofthearchitects.Asthe
SARAGRAPHIAmovedcloser,otherformsappeared.Monstrousstatuesofbeheadedfigures,figures
withmorethanahead.Serpentinenecksandbulbousbodiesallfrozeninconcrete,intributetothe
oncemightyleadersofthecity.ThesevisionsdisturbedandfascinatedJ.thealienthing,halfattachedto
hisfacewithfleshliketubes,lurchedforwardandbackinhisconsumedhandsasitbroughtinsightstoJ.
hestruggledtoseemorethanhecould,hestruggledtofindthetowerbuttherewasnone.
areyousurewereontherightcourse?
Deluciacheckedtherecordsonthecomputerscreenontheship.themotherIMMACULUSgaveus
thesepoints.Wearerightwhereweresupposedtobe.Thetowerissupposedtobedeadahead!
179

IdontseeitDelucia.Iseemanyotherthingsbutnotthetower.
hastheplacechangedsomuchintwoyears?Itshouldnotbe.
wehavenoideahowmuchhaschanged..
shouldwecontactthedoctor?
wait!Wait!Jstrainedinonedirection,leaninghisbodyforward.Thealienthingalsosensedithad
foundsomethingforitwasnotrestlessandbusyinhishand.
whatisit?deluciashouted,movingclosertoJwhohadgonesilent.
thereisalight.White.Twoofthem.Likeheadlightsinthedistanceitsmovingtowardstowards
something
atower?
no.itlookslikealargebuildingthatislyingonitsside
couldthetowerhavefallen?
Idontknowbutthelightitsrealandalivesomethingishappeningtheretheresaredlightnow
Illgetuscloser.DeluciapunchedsomekeysandtheSARAGRAPHIAmaneuveredcloserstilltothe
shores.
Jleanedforward,thealienthingconsumingmoreofhisfacewithtubes.Iseeasign.
whichone?Deluciaaskedasshebroughtupalistofsymbolsonthescreen.
redletters.AWandanupsiodedownFrunningdownfromthecentreoftheW,youknowwhatI
mean?
deluciascrolleddownthelistofsymbolswithherfingeruntilshereachedonthatmatched.
WINGFARshesaid.theyareaheadofus.
wingwhat?
wevegottoreachtheshore.
buttheresnotowerdelucia,ourordersarenotto
IKNOWourordersJ.butWINGFARhasarrivedwhichmeanstowerorno,wehavetobeginsettingit
up.
thetoweristheconduit,howarewegoingtosetupwithoutit?
180

weregoingin.Illcontactthedoctoroncewehittheshore.Gearupdealerman.Ourworkmustbegin
soon.
DeluciapunchedinmorecoordinatesandthescoutshipSARAGRAPHIA,aheadofitsmothership
IMMACULUS,movedintowardstheplaceofnight.

thisisit.Albusaid.
ThesigilofWINGFAR,glowingandincontactwiththevoiceofFARhadledALbuandchungtothesite.
Throughthemazeofabandonedbuildingsandtwisted,rippedstreets.Pastcanalsofvacantschools.
Throughtemplestornapartandburntdown.Thetruckhadarrived.
ItwasdarkandhardtoseebutthehighbeamsandthesigilofWINGFARlighteduppartsofwhatlooked
likea25storeybuildinglyingdownonitsside.Asifuprooted,thebuildinglaylikeadeadsentinel,
almostunbrokensaveforsomemajorcracksdownitsupperhalf.Therewasahugecraterleftatthe
footofthebuildingasifsomegreathandhadpulleditoutofitsfoundationsandlayitdown,hopingnot
tobreakitlikeafragiletoy.ItwassuchanunrealsightandChungwasspeechless.Albugotoutunfazed
bythismonstrousthinglyingdownbytheedgeofacliffandwentroundtothebackofthetruck.Chung
litupaleafrollofpoisonedflowersandsuckeddeep.Headswimminginheadyfumesandsmoke.The
windshaddieddownandscrpasofoldnewspaperscircledintheair,slappingitselfagainsttwisted
lampposts,gettingcaughtinthejawsofdeadtrees.ALbureturnedtohissmokingpartner.wevegotto
findthetopfloorofthistower.Helookedatchung.areyoualright?
whathappenedtothepeoplehere?heasked,almostquietly.
thoughtItoldyounottoask?
Chungglancedaroundagain,takinginwhateversightthetruckslightcouldprovide.Inthedistance,
therewerestrangeanimalnoises,likehorsesneighingwiththesoundofweepingdogs.Albusensed
thatchungwasfeelinginfinitesimalamongtheruinsofthecitybeyondERC.HefearedChung;sreaction.
HecursedFARatthebackofhismindforconvincinghimthatthispartnerwasstrongerthanthelast.He
triedtopullChungoutofit.
heylisten.Twoyearsago,whentheredeventoccurred,thispartofthecitytookthebruntofit.It
maylooklikeeveryonediedhorriblybutthatisntentirelyso.Ourmissionhereisnotaboutthepeople.
Itsaboutthisthingonthistruck,whichwemustdelivertothetopofthisbuilding,inaunitcalledthe
twothreezero.Wemustthenwaitforthethingsengineerstoarrivebywayoftheseaandwhenthey
do,wehanditovertothemandcrossbackwherewewillcontinuewithourlives.Whateverhappened
hereorwillhappenhere,isn;tourbusiness.Itisntforustoknowordoanythingabout.Wecomplete
ourworksothatotherscancompletetheirs.Juststaywithwhatwemustdoalright?Donotthink
beyondthismoment.Ofwhathappensnextorwhathadhappened,isnotforyourmindtoask.alright?
chunglookeduncertainandtookthetimetodigestwhathehadheard.
181

comeon,albusaid,yoursurvivedSHAR-DAEprison.YouweregivenanotherchancebyMisterFAR.
Dontendupbecomingaprisonerofyourowncuriosity.
Chungthensigheddeeply,flickingoffhisleafcigarette.letsgettowork.Hesaid,climbingontothe
truck.Albuhopedthathehadsaidenoughalthoughhesensedthatitwouldnotbethiseasy.

Jreleasedthealiencreaturefromhisfaceandleftittohangabouthistorsobythetwothickoraganic
tubesthatranintothesidesofhisribs.Heporedoverthemaps,detailedbythedoctor.Hewas
barebodiedandsweatingprofuselyafterthevisioningofthelandscape.Deluciacouldnothelpbutstare
athisback,tattooedwiththelettersI.N.R.Iandjunkiebelowthat.Threesignsofthesunrandownhis
spine.Atarantulatattoofinishedoffhislowerback.thiscannotbe.Jsaid,studyingthemaps,turning
itaround.thestatuesthatIsawshouldnotbethereatall,andtheinvertedtrees,theyweresupposed
tobemuchless.
thingscanchangequicklythedoctorsaid.Thisshouldbeexpected.
Shecouldsensethespiritsthatshecommands,restlessandchurningbehindher.sheemotionally
calmedthemdown.Shepointedtothemarkonthemapthatread71.ifthereiswhereweresupposed
toland,wewill.Jwasconcerned.
whatelsedidthedoctorwarnusabout?Imayhavemissedsomething.
therewasthepossibilityofEQUATACITYsleaderstakingthezoneback,withagreatermagic,butI
doubytthatistrulypossible.WhatwasleftinthewakeoftheREDIDOLismagicofanotherspaceand
time.Theyarenotequippedenough.
andtheonlyonepowerfulenoughtotakebackthezoneisHewhodevouredtheIDOL.Jfinishedoff
herexplanation.Iseeyouhavestudiedyourhistory.Iwanthimbackasmuchaseveryoneelse.If
knowingthehistorymeansIcangetthejobdoneright,thenthatswhatIlldo.Sheputherhandon
hisshoulder.Hecouldfelethewarmthofloverunningdownhisback.Theloveofamother-
queen.priestess.wellgethimback.Shesaid.Ipromiseyou,wewill.

theunknowncargowasheavierthanexpectedbutALbuandChungsummonedmorestrengthfromthe
poolofFARandheavedthehugeblocklikethingoffthebackofthetruckandontotheground.Agreat
blackcloakcoveredtheobjectbeneath.Onthecloakweresigilsandunknownsymbols,evenlyspaced
outandglowingred.Albyhaddriventhetruckrighttotheendofthefallenbuilding,wherethehouseof
twothreezeroismeanttobe.Theobjectwasplacedrightattheopeningtothebuildingitself,akindof
balcony.EverythingwasonitssidenowandAlbuunderstoodthatitposedproblems.Butthatwasthe
problemfortheengineersandnothim.Soalltheycoulddonowwaswait.Theysatbytheobjectandlit
182

theirflowers.TheenergyofFARrecedingfromtheirsystem.Theireyesnownolongerred.Aftersome
silence,Chungspoke.howdidyoustartatWINGFAR?heasked,thenquicklyadded,weCANtalk
aboutthisright?
Albulaughed.yes,yes,wecan.Hetookadeepbreathofpoisonedflowersandbegan.
Iwasabelieverintheotherworldsfromayoungage.mymotherwasawitch.Myfatherwasa
prisoner.Hewastheblackmanofthecovenmymotherwasin.fromthestarttheylovedeachotherm
butmyfatherlovedhispowermore.Hebecameambitiousandonetimesummonedapowergreater
thanhimself.Obviouslytherewereterribleconsequences.Thepowerhecalleduponkilled76boundary
watchers.Yousee,Icamefromaworldwhereonedimensionoftencrossedeasilyintothenext.These
watchersmadesurethatthewrongentitiesdonotcrossoverforthewrongreasons.Theywerearace
sanctionedbyanevenhighernamelessauthorityandnootherentityhadtherighttointereferewiththe
workoftheboundarywatchers.Youcanimaginethechaosthatensuedthekillingof76ofthem.MR
WU,ahighpriestsetoverthejudgementandexecutionofroguesorcerorssentencedmyfatherto
eternalimprisonmentinaplacecalledtheTANIAKQUADRANT.Theactionsofmyfatherwassosevere
thathisentirelybloodlinetoohadtobesentenced.MymonandIalsohadtopayfortheerrorofhis
ways.toremindus,wasMRWUslogic,nottocrossthelineandtoweildourpowerscorrectly.My
motherwassenttowatchoveramysticalchildwhohadagreatroletoplayinourtime.Idonotknow
herandIhavenotspokentomymothersince.Asforme,IwassenttoserveinthecourtofLORE,the
lineofshamanssenttoundotheworkofmyfather.Agreatshaman-kingnamedDAEKENbanishedthe
thingmyfathercalleduponbacktoitsoriginandIwastoserveinhiskingdomeforamillennia.Iwas
placedunderthetutelageofLORDBAPLOEoftheBAPLOEDYNASTY.Itwasthedynastythatoversawthe
restructuringandevolutionofM.thedimensionIwassentto.Ihelpedshiftgreatpiecesofthecosmic
formthatwasM.everytimethatworldevolved,thedynastyIslavedforreshapedit.Ilearntagreatdeal
fromthedynasty.Iunderstoodhowworldswerebuiltandtorndownfornearingtheendofmy
sentence,theworldIwassenttoenteredanapocalypse.BeforetheendofM,MRWUintercededand
arrangedanexclusionfromthefinalwrathofMscreator.ItwasthenthatMRFARapproachedmeto
joinhiscompany.todoexactlywhatyoudo,butonasmallerscale.Heexplained.Istillhadnofamily
thenandtherewasnothingelsetolose,soIagreed.Havebeenworkingforhimsince.
Chungcontemplatedthestoryforagoodwhile.Piecingtogetherthefactsandthehistories.Itseemed
thatheunderstood.
werealsoreshapingaworldrightnowarentwe?Werejustdoingonepartofawholeprocess.
yesmyfriend.Yesweare.ForthetimeofdireNovemberisathandandtheworldalwaysturnswith
suchatide.

183

Thefinaljourneytotheplaceofnight,ofthedarksideofEQUATAishauntedbyafever.Thefeverof
transitionasitiscalledinthehistoriesofJandDelucia.Theywerefirststruckbyblackoutsandwhen
theyhavestruggledfortheirdestinedseclusions,ablacksleeptakesthemandwithitcomesthefireof
pre-equata.Thisisthefeveredwombofequate,thejourneythroughthebirthcanaloffire.Thewhite
heatofrebirth.

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wearebutonethinginthefaceofmany.Wearebutwanderersinalandalreadylost.Wearethe
witnessesforthingsnotyetseen.Wearetheauthorsofunrealizedrealities.DECORUSTHETHIRD>

100

Bywhichnocturnefever,didthedreamofthehundredroomsarise,Idonotknow.Greywerethe
windowlesswalls,thecanvasforourcreation.Uponeachwerestonesofblack.Smallstonesforming
signs,tellingtimes,markingplaces.EachstoneItouchedtrembleddifferent.Anotherfrequency,a
variantconsciousness.Iwasnakedandhadnogenitals.Iwasbaldandbloatedandmyfeetdidnot
touchtheground.Thevoicesfromchildhoodreturned.Theyhadcometonamethestones.Thisisthe
first,thisisthehundredth,theysaid.Theroomshadnodoorsandwindows.Onlyblackstones,
shimmeringonthewalls.

ThroughthewallsIdrifted.Roomintoroomintoroom.Thestoneswerealwaysthere.Eachstone
alwaysdifferent.Eachvoiceanothertone.Ahundredroomsforahundredminds.Theysaid.Ahundred
pagesforthethousandthbook.Ahundredhoursforthethousandthclock.ahundredchildrenfor
motherthousand.Therewasnonightandtherewasnoday.Notimenorreason.Nothereornowor
then.Theeyeswerethatofdreaming.Ablurdistantmemorypregnantwithpresentthought.WhatI
think,Idream.WhatIdream,Ilive.Thisishome,thethousandwomb.Thisisheaven,thehundred
temples.Toforsaketheworldistotransitinnumbers.Toerrwithhumbersistodamagelife.Through
thewallsIsleptandwalked.ThroughthelabyrinthIsearch.Thenextroom,thenestroomandthenext.
Onethroughtohundred,forthemercyofgreatonethousand.
184

Iwakeandtheearthiscold.Aconcretecorpse,awindowlessplace.Thisroomisdarkthoughinsleep
notsee.theeyesignorestheblack.Thegreyreturnswiththestonesonthewall.Myhandreachesfor
thestone.Thevoiceofthemindsconverse.Theytellmeitssecretname.theredhandthatbleedsthe
writofmyth.Thearrivalofthelordmostthought.Aseachangeintheabyss.Thepathofthevagrant
wind.Starlightcasttheshadoweddome.Thegreathubofthehundredbeds.Awhoreforeveryscar.A
stormforeachendeavor.Blestnotthecrimsontide.Singnotourbloodiedgraces.Thetideofthe
universeturns.Thestonesonthewall,apocalypse.Idriftliketheghostforsaken.Iroamlikeaspiritlost.
Ijourneytotheheartofthemonster.Thefallofthebridgebehind.

Naked,Iforsakestarvation.Forthehouroftheshiphascome.Theinvocationoffathersatellite.
Descend,itsfavoredpowers.Aconduitforhundredpowers.Naked,Iamtheradar,thetowerofsignal
alpha,theheartbeatofomega.Ahundrednightsforthethousandmornings.Thehundredstarsofthe
sunonethousand.Thethousandmythandthehundredstories.

Ahundredroomsforthehallofthousand.

185

99

thestickmachinewasmostlydead,blacktarbloodstuckanddriedinitsthroat,bloodstreamslowing
anddryingup.smokepouredoutthinlylikeinkunderwater.Snakinginacolorlessair.Myarmswere
bleeding,tryingtorevivethemachine.Itssmallcreaksandgroansweredevoidofmostlife.Inmyarms,
themachinewoulddie.Ihadtakenmostofitapart.Screwsandplates,andgearsandboltscoveredin
theblackdriedbloodwaseverywhere.Markssprayedacrossthefloorandwalls.Theheat,having
escapedthemachine,terrifiedtheroomwithitsfever.Thelossofthemachinewasgreaterthanmy
ownpain.Isatbeforeit,indejection,watchingittrembleitslastmoments.Thewireslaybyitssideina
tangledmess.Arteriesandveinsknottedandimpossibletosave.Somepartsofthefloorwerestillslick
withtheblackliquid.Thelightfromthemachineisnomore.

Thevoiceshadpromisedthedemise.Nostoneuponthiswallcouldbringitback.Noamountofcracks
ornameswritteninsuccessioncouldofferreprieve.Iclawedwhatwasleftofthepaintfromthe
machine.Whitepaintstuckunderfingernails.Nailsbrokenfromthedisrepair.Itriedorganizingthe
piecesscatteredontheground.Igroupedtheheartofthemachinetogether.Thespineandtheskull
anotherside.Thehourintheroomwassoontopassandtheorgansofthedeadthinggavenoanswers.
Istrippedoffthefactoryclothesandstoodnakedbeforethemachine.Icouldnotrecognizetheparts
thatwouldfitintomybody.Whateverwassmallandsharp,Imanagedtoburyitundermyskin.The
wiresweretoothicktouseforsewingupthewounds.Iofferedthedriedbloodmyown,hopingitwould
mixandbringwhatwasdeadtolife.Partsofthebrokenpiecesglistenedwithnewwetblood.Some
partsrespondedbutcouldnotprogresswithouttheotherpartsintact.Barefootcrunchesintothe
brokenglass.Iwillwalkwithwhatisdead.Ileftfootprintsofblackandredliquidaroundthemachine.I
wipedmyfingersaroundthesmallsilentscreensdislodgedfromthefaceofthething.OnebyoneI
triedremovingthesticksbutonlythreecameout,withonehalfbroken.Itwasntenoughtobuild
anothermachineform.Thepowersourceitselfwascoldandtimehadrunout.Thevoicesofferedrites
ofburialbuttheconcretecouldnotbebroken,noholecouldbedug,nofirecouldbestruck.Emptyand
unmoving,Ileftthemachinevacantinthecircleofmysteps.Thestonesinthewallhadfallenoffin
tandemwiththedyingmachine.Now,onlytwowasleft.Itisthedarkerstonesaidthevoices.Other
voicesargued.Itisthestoneintheshapeoftheeye.Iwouldratherbedarkerthanwithsight.Iturned
andtoreoutthedarkerstone.Putitinmymouthandwithdifficulty,Iswallowedit.
186

Turningmybacktothemachine,Iletthestonedissolveandfeedmybloodstream.Euphoriacreeps.And
asIclosemyeyes,thesilenceofthestickmachineintensifiesasitisdelivereduntothehandsof
absence.

98

thegypsywomantravelswitharedstormwithin.Panictakestheshapeofaragingspirit,holdingher
hostage,usingherasweapon.Thepeoplearoundhersufferedinherpath.TheirHeartspalpitating,
regreteatingthesoulsuddenly,itwashardtobreathe.Ifoundthegypsywomancoweringinthecorner
ofmyhall.Hercardsspreadoutandburningwitharedfire.Thesmokefilledthehallandthefirecould
notbeputout.Ikilledsomeone.Shesaid.Ikilledsomeonewithmyanger.Icouldfeeltheredstorm
withinherandwouldnotapproach.shewaslikeapoisonedanimal,contagionandvenomous.To
disarmherwilddestroyer,Ihadtounbindmycards.Suchanactwasdanger.Afteritslastexpedition,
muchofitspowerwaslost.Tofightanotherbattlewasfollybutnochoicehadi.Icouldfeelthesoreson
myfeetreturning.Therushofthetideinthehallwasgrowingloudertomyhearing.Thewildghostdog
ofafriocahowled.Theshiveringforcedmetounearththecards.Withmymindthefurnituremoved.
Theceilingtrembled.Thegypsywomanwascrying.Ikilledtheman/Ikilledtheman.
theshadowofWUhangsaboutyou.Itoldher.herexecutionerwouldsoonarrive.Therewaslittletime
left.Tothesanctuary,intohavenIentered.Thetideofthehallwasscreaming.Wavescrashingagainst
thewallofafrioca.UnearthIbroughtherthebox.Inexorcisadaeunmasking.Iremovedtheentrails
bindingthebox.Thegypsywomanvomitedintothefire.Thefiregrewfiercer.Thunderinghoovesdrew
nearer.Herexecutionerwascoming.FromthegapingmouthIcarriedoutthecards.Aslowdisastrous
monsterstirringfromsleep.SaddenedwasmyheartandslowlyIweptasIkissedthecards.awake,my
childlove,awaketothishour.Thegypsywomanhaskilled.TheWUisnowcoming.Warmthgrewfrom
thedeckofcold.Fromtheabysmalcoma,thenamedonesrose.Eachcard,eachname,eachplace,each
time.Risinglikethesmokeoftheburningcards.ArrivinglikethejudgmentofWU.Ibeheldthepictures
thatwrotemysoul.Myvoice,empoweredbyvoices,emblazonedassigils.Thealphabetofmyown
omega.Idrewthecardsneeded.
TheimageofthegutofgrHg.
Theblackshiningcard.
ThebeheadingofRedIDOL.
AnintricatemapfromtheVaultofM.

187

trappedbethenoiseofthisdeath.Afarcrybeitsmaster.Icouldthenseehowthemanhaddied.I
couldsenseherbehemothrageeatingawaytheunawarenessofhislife.forhedidnotpaymindto
thingsgreaterthanhe,itwassuchgreatnessthatconsumedhim.Andnow,thepotentscavengingbeast
thatfed,isinturnstarvedbymybrutalhand.AmarkmadethatdivertsthethunderedcastofWU.the
greatthunderofWudeafenedthefieldofstars.Thebeastrolldon,itsfirediverging.Anothersealhas
beensetagainstitshand.Thedefiantsorcererwithgreaterpotent,protectsthechild.Inhishead
recallingjestersburntatthestatue.Ofsaddenedmonksleavingmachina.

96

bytheriverGA,hehadfollowed.Barefeetburntandblisteredintheheat.Hehadbeenwalkingfordays
inthesun.thefurnaceplanetthatdidnotsetinmonths.Soonitwouldburnatitshighest.Itwasthen
thathehadtoburyhimself,inthepoisonedground,sothathecouldlive.Thehotwindtoreathisskin.
Razorlikesandeatingawayathisbody.Hemovedonagainstthewindbecausethiswasthewaytothe
placeofnight.Thiswasthewayhome.bythesludgeoftheGAhejourneyed,lookingoutforthecrane
people,withtheirstabbingandsuckingbeaks.Theywhowouldkillanyotherlivingthing.Theycreptout
ofthebrokengroundlikespiders,theysunktheirpoisonedbeaksintotheblackGA.Theydrankfrom
188

thebileofthebeast,thehorridriverthatranfromthegutofGrHgtothemotherwombwoundinthe
north.ThesludgecarriedwithittheexcrementandvomitofGA,thethingthatissicknessbytheshore.
Nearthebankoftheriverweretheflowersblack.Ambient,lethalflorawhosepotentflavorbroughton
deliriumandslowmadness.Buttoliveonuponthispath,ithadtobeconsumedatleastonceeverytwo
daysofsun.intheslowdeathofthemindcamesalvation.Byconsumingtheblackflowerslittleatatime,
onelives.Tisbettertolivewithmadnessthandiewithouttheplaceofnight.BytheriverGA,Ercondus
thetravelerfollowed.

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

95

Bytheunlitcorridorsofstone,theprince-doctorImmanuelGrantfollows.Gone,aretheoldpaintings,
thefaintairofherscent.Coldarethewallsashewalks.Alongsadnesshastranspiredandtheunlitway
istheonlywayforthedoctor.

Thereisaburdeninhisheartashetrudgeson,hissightaccustomedtodarkness.Hiswillmoving
forwardthroughtheendlesspath.Hismindisheavywithlostimages.Oflivestakenawayfromthewall.
189

Lostinthelabyrinthhejourneyson.walkingfordays,formonthsforyears.Hissoulweariesgreatlybut
hisbodydoesnot.Thereisnorestinthedarkness.Hefeelstheinsectsbeyondthewalls.Thelocustsof
timeandspace.Beneathhisfeethefeelsthemaggots.Denizensofthingsunderneath,sunkbelowthe
surface,hiddenfromlucidthoughts.

Endofreview

therestofthebookwasstillblank.Ihadfoundthecontentsauthenticforsomereason.Thatthiswasa
kindofbookofrecords,madebyawitnesswhodidnotorcouldnotfinishit.Whathadbecomeofthis
authorIcannotsay.ThroughmyvisionswhenIfirsthandledthebook,Ihadalreadyseenthetowerand
otherimagesnotmentioned.Ibelievedthemtobeeventsnotrecordedhereandthatsucheventsin
connectionwitheverythingthathastranspiredisstillinmotion.Thedeadeyesofthemammothhad
givenmetwocities.Thefirstisofthecitywoundedinwar.Theotheristheplaceofnightsongand
retribution.TheplacesoughtbythetravelerERCONDUSrecordedinthebook.Itwasnearlyfiveinthe
evening.Iclosedthebookandrewrappeditintheclothandstring.Therewerethreemorecard
readingstofinishofftonight.Anewshipmentofstoneswastoarrive.Thelasthoursofbusinesshadto
bedealtwithbeforeIcouldpackupandleaveforthefirstcity.Ispentasmalltimeintheprayingroom
askingforsafepassageandthatthehausofghoswouldbeprotectedinmyabsence.Iheardthewaters
inthewellsplasharound,acceptingmywordsandintent.Theredantswerestillonthecalendar,asign
thatanun-ordinarytimehasarrived.BYTHEARRIVALOFEVENING,ALLTHREEAPPOINTMENTSFOR
THEREADINGSWERECANCELLEDitwasasifallthreepeoplehadtakenillatthesametime.They
soundednasalandweakonthephoneandIbidthemeachawellrecovery.Thestonesonthewallhad
shifted,tellingmethatcertainareaenergieswerechanging.Itwasntanotherstormbuttheconditions
ofexixtencethemselveshavealtered.Thestreetsnowranonbyadifferenthand.adifferentforce
ligfhtedtheapproachingnight.time.theclienteleoftheeveningtoobecamestranger,asifthevisitors
thatfollowedinthewakeoflastnightsstrangerwasevenmoremysteriosandaffectingthanhe.Anold
maninagreysuitcameinwithajaroffrogskeletons.Iamlookinformygrandchildhesaid,offering
methejar,helpmeplease.MyspiritchosethesaulaactandwiththedeckofsaulIfoundthatthe
childhadbeenlonggone.Takenformthisplaceofexistence.Totheoldman;sdismayIlethimpart
withablessingoffavoreddreaming.Ofhisgrandchildleapingandplayinginasunlitfield.sheishappyI
toldhimasheleftbutIknewhewasnotconvinced.Thenamothercamein,alsolookingforalostgirl.I
wasuneasywithherdistress.Thereweremonstersinmygutthatstirred.Acertainfearfollowedher
intothestore.IhadtomakeherwaitasIconsultedtheheadofthemammoth.Itsdeadeyesgaveme
nootherway.Ihadtoturnherdownmuchtoherpleading.youarebyfarthebestshaman,fargreater
thanyourfathergodresthissoul.Helpmeplease.Icouldnot.Ithadsomethingtodowiththebook
butIdidnotknowwhatitwas.IbelievedittobethegirlNicole,whowasabducted.Butthemythspoke
onlyofhergrandparentsandmadenomentionofamother.Iprayedfortheweepingwomanassheleft.
Whatwasbecomingofthisevening?Whathadchangedoverthecourseofthelasttwelevehours?I
thoughtthesethingsasIlockedupthestoreagain,inpreparationformydeparturewiththebook.
190

Iahdchosenmyplaceofritualbeneaththetenthcabinetwheretheoversizedcatoforosat,nexttothe
statueofthemanwhoreturnedformthedeadandthestonebeigeeaglelookingupwardstothe
heavens.Istripepdmygarmentsandsatnakedandcrossleggedbeforetheceremonialtable.Layedout
acrossitwastheclothofephilisanduponitIwouldlayoutmyobjectsforthejourney.Ihadshavedmy
headbaldandmostofmybodyforpurity.Therespectsbeingpaidtothevirginstate.Iconsumedthe
yellowflowersaccordingly,theflorathatwasofsister,ofmorningtotheflowersofblacknight..fiveI
consumedandalloweditfreedominmybloodstream.Onmyrightwristweretheeyesofigre,strungby
thefircord,thegleamingbrownbeadsoftheprotectorigre.OnmyleftwristIstrungtheeyesofbalak,
thealmostblackspheresofdestroying.Thebeadsofengagementofwar.Bymyneckihungthewoodof
ihist,partofasacredtreeintheforestofarzeththeheadofthewoolymammothlayonitssideand
fromitsdeadmouthitwasissuedtheartifactsrequiredforthejourney.

Thecardsofdecorus.Tarotoftheotherplace.
Thedeckofsaula,archetypedeckofthemythofsaula
Thecrystalofiande&nyl;HeartspheresofthecyclesofUL
Thebookoftheunknownsigil
Sandsofthefirstgarden

Ilayedthemoutonebyone.Thedeckofdecorus,havingaquireditthroughthetradeofaneldercard
readerTzuarRaanan,whochosetovanishayearaftertheredidolevent..
Thedeckofsaula,agiftreceivedhoursintoadeathstatethatoccurredafterconsumingthefameddruq
locotraineofferedbythenowmissingdealer-magicianDrashad.Inhandlingthedeckheisaffronted
withthehorizonsofthebluedesertwhereafiguregreaterthanIhadfallentohisknees,hismindagape
withthesecretmysteriesofanorderunknowntotheoccultismofthishistory.
ThecrystalspeherewasanofferingbyDecorusthethird,whochosetotradehisloveforthetwomoon
goddessesofanothergalaxyforinitiationintotheorderofmysteries..InhandlingitIfelthisloss,his
sacrificemadeforhisqueenswhomheloved,theremovalofthestonesintheheartofNylbytheheat
ofhismartyrddeath
Thesandsothefirstgardenwereremnantsaftermyinitiatoryburialbyhefirstdraftersofthehuman
pantheonofmythos.Andfinallythebook.Theobjectofmynextevolution.

191

Theritalhadstolentimeagainfromthehausofghos.Iamaquarterpastthethirdhourofnight.The
mixoftheyellowflowerswascomingonstrongIlittheincenceoflavenderandallowedthesmoketo
envelopmeinitsotherworldlywisps.Thescaronmyfacethrobbed,mysoulreacheddifferentheightsas
Ipackedtheitemsintothebagofapalach,tradedetomebyanomadwarriorfortheerasureofthe
facesofhisenemiesastheydiedbyhissword.Thebagwasblackandhadthesymbolsofthefour
elements,chaosandthesignofcosmicbalance.Theseventhsignoftheastrologicalcharts.Indulgence
isthefoodofthesoulthathasgivenitselftothepeople.Ibroughtoutthehalfbottleofwhiskeyfrom
lastnightandunwrappedafreshbundlefblackflowers.Thejourney,themammothheadtoldme,
woulddemandmuchfromyourstrength.BecontentwiththegiftsoftheGreatestone.Ipouredmyself
afullglassandcontemplatedthetheactionsthatIamtotake.Whatdrivesmeoutwardfromthisplace?
FormonthsIhadnotsteppedoutfromtheghoshause.FormonthsIcontemplatedandjourneyedthe
universefrominsideaclutteredmagickalstore.Whythedecisiontoleavenow,withabook,insearchof
anauthorandanoriginthatmaynotexist?itisanaspectoftheeternalwandererthemmaothhead
said.IrecallthewordsofafilmscorecomposeJaychattaway

wearearaceofwanderes.Butonlyrecentlyhavewemanagedtotravelbeyondourownworld.the
resultshavebeensurprising.

Itisinournaturetosearchandtojourneyoutwardafterspendingsolongjourneyingin.Iclosedupthe
bagandbegantodress.TerrainblackbootsandIndiangarments.Ibundledmyagelonghairintoatight
turbanandsetthesealofAlvadorandjadeshia,themagickalnamesofmyparents,nthefrontofthe
turvan.IputonthetworingsofX-ftarcsteinthesilverfromtheoresoftheinesmines.Outside,therain
beginstofallat4amasIovercoatmyselfinthefurofthedeadmammoth.Inthefinalritual,Icutmy
palmswiththebladeoferdanddrawlinesofmybloodalongthewallsofthestore.Thiswastoprotect
it,tocontainthecountlessconsciousnesstrappedinhundredsofartifactscollectedsincemyfathers
time.Itwastimetoleavetheghos~haus,withaworldbeyondthatawaitsme.

Bythemidnightsun,Ideparted.Theworldhadgottencolder,thestreetsofatonfringemuchnoiser
thanbefore.,.At4a.m.thosewhodidnotsleepwanderedandmediateddrunkinthealleys.Thosewho
hadjustwoken,performedtheirnocturneballetsunderdimstreetlightsandtherain.Itisthepromise
ofpurermovementwhenblessedbytheacidrainoftheoutskirts.Onbothsidesofthestreetswere
shophousesofobscurityandmostofthemwereclosedatthishour.TherewerestoressellingLostand
futurefurniture,astralphotographystudios,foreignfoodplacesthatsoldthingsstillalive,exotic
midnightblackaquariumsofcreaturesformtheabyss,forthecollectorswholivedinperpetualdarkness.
storesofplasticlifeandmannequinsexslaves,ahardcheesebreadbakeryandagrocerystorefortrash
periphinilia,alcoholandcigarettes.Itwasalientobeoutagainfromthehouse.Thegroundfelt
different,asifthetanksthatrumbledthrougheveryweekhadmadeitstoicandstrong.Theprocession
ofthousandsoffeetonthewaytothefuneralhomeattheendofstreetshadgiventheroadakindof
192

dignifiedmourning,indifferencetodeathanditsweepingfollowers.Butnotallwasdark.Bythecandy
storesthatopenedallnight,childrenwhoweresleeplesssoughtsweetnessinthebrightcoloredcandy
covens,playinglullabiesthatsoothedtheiryoungsoulsinsteadofputtingtoresttheirbodies.Thewhore
housesfartherdowneastofthestreetwasstillthesame,althoughthegirlslookedyoungerandsome,
evenalittleafraidofthefreshfringedwellers.,myfirststophadtobethebookstore.Theownerofthe
storecalledtheFickataWritwouldhopefullyknowsomethingaboutthebookIadandknowwhereI
couldfindtheeditorofapublishinghousethatcouldhelpmemore..Icrossedtheroaduntothestretch
thatledmetothebookstore.ThenIcameacrossthestrangerwhohadtradedthebook.Hewassitting
atasmallbusterminalsetbetweentwohorsesstables.Hewaswaitingforapublictransportthatwould
notarrivetillthemorningsun.ah,mrghos.Hegreetedme.outonatrip?heasked.whyareyou
stillhere?wastheonlyquestionedthatcametomymind.thestreetwouldnotletmeleave.Hesaid
butigaveyousafepassage.yesyoudid.ButthestreetbelievesIamtobeofaidandconsequence
withyoua;thoughIdontquiteknoworwhatthatbe.Hisstrangeenergyremainedsincere.Something
inmewhisperedaneedforhiscompany.Noonemeetstheghoshausefornoreason.alrightItold
him.Ihaveabookstoretogoto.Toseeifafriendknowsmoreaboutthisbook.thenletusproceed
hesaid,gettingup,takinghisbriefcasewithhim,andtighteninghiscoataroundhimself,arefugefrom
thelatenightwindandrain.

ThelightofickatawritwasonamdMonsuierEnreed,theownershouldbepresent.weeneteredatonce
intoarich,dense,complexworld.allthebooksinFickataWritwerehugeepics,withsomevolumesas
vastasfutureencyclopedias.Icouldseethatthelayoutwasoccultinnature.Rowsuponrowsofbooks
intallblackshelvesbuiltintoamazelikestructure.Manygreatcandlessuspendedupsidedownfrom
theroofandwasfullylitbutheatwasabsentinthisplace.Thesmellofoldbooksandthecoldairof
futurerangesgavememizedemotions.Theplavewasbrimmingwithpowers.Willssetinwords,worlds
setinmillionsofpages.Ifeltakindofelectrifiedresonancecomingfrommybagwithahighprobability
thattheunfinishedbookwiththestrangesymbolonthefrontwasreactinginthepresenceoftheother
greatlibraryofepics.Awomaninaflowingbrowndressappearedfrombehindoneofthesheleves.Itst
artledmyvistor-friendandshenoticedit.Iapologizegoodsir.Ididnotmeantoscareyou.ifyoucould
excusethewaymyfacewouldgazeintoyours.Halfherfacewaslikeasnake.Scalyandcurveslike
apython,andyet,hereyesandforeheadwaslikethatofanowl.Iaminsearcgofthebookofowllords,
tofindmypatrondeity.Whatareuoherefor?sheasked.Mostcustomersalongthestreetsofaton-
fringewereconversationalthisway.Theyalwayshadagenuineinterestinotherswhosharedasimilar
passion.oh,thevistorexplained,Iamherewithmyfriend.Werelookingforsomethingrelatedto
abookwehave.whastisthebookabout?sheenquired.Ihadtointercede.itissomethingofa
privatenature,pardonmyintrusion.Iamlookingforthemonsuier.myapologiesforbeingalittletoo
inquisitivetheladysaid,themonseuirshouldbeoutsoon,heishelpingmfindmybook.nowif
youdexcuseme,gooddaygoodsirs.Shebowedalittlelthenvanishedbehindanothershelfofthick
heavybooks.Thebooksherewouldoftenspeaktome,ifIbroughtmyselfintotheirproperfrequencies.
Theydfilledmewithalanguagethatpassesthoughtsandformsandwords.theywouldprovideme
withtheemotionsofplaces,oftimesandandofpeople,fictitiousorno.Ihaveoftenedlovedtheway
193

theirspiritswoveintomine.ItwasafeelingIalwaystreasuredwhevermyfatherhadbroughtmeto
thisplace.Itisaplacethatisevenolderthatnthehauseofghos.Oftheolderhistoriesthatdateback
furtherthanthemagicalobjectsinthepossessionofmystore/fromsomewherebehindthebookstore,
Enreedcalledouttothewoman,belovedladyofhebirdshesaid,IbelieveIhavefoundyourbook.
Heemergedfromthetoweringshelvesandstoppedinhistrackswhenhesawus.ogblessedproetics,I
didntknowyouwereherbaronGhoshaus.Mysinceresorrynessforkeepingyouunserved.itis
alrightmonsieurEnreed,please,iigesturedtotheladywhohadreturnedfromherwanderingsinthe
bookstore,attendtoherneedsfirstandforemost.withyou,Ishallbewithshortly,hecurtsiedto
me,thenuncomfortablytothevistorandofferedthebooktotheowlwoman.

Whenhewasdonehecametrousandgesturedustothetearoom.Themanwhowaswithmedidnot
heedthecall.Hewasstaringoutofthebookstoreswindow.Hisfaceentranced.Hepokeinadronelike
way,thewoman.Hesaid,thewomanwhogaveththebook,watchesus.Imovedtothewindow,
searchingtheareaforsomesortofenergy.Therewasnone.Ilookedout.Therewasnooneonthe
streetsatthistime.areyousureitwasher/Iasked.itcannotbe.Isensedsomethingwrongwas
goingtocomenext.

shesdead.

Allthewindowsinthestorecracked,anunknownpressurefromwithintheglass.Fromwithintheheart
oftheglassblackbloodspreadthencoveredtheentirewindow,sealingitshut.Thedoorhandlesofthe
storemeltedoff.Powerwasdrainedfromtheceilinglights.Mysoulsuddenlyscreamed.Everything
wentblack.

IfeltAnold,wrinkledhandtouchmyfaceinthedarkness.Fullofecho,thecronecrackedvoicespoke,
yourapedmechildyoupenetratedmotherintheblackIfeltanabortion.Aterribleshredding
escapedthebowelsofdarkness.ThroughthewallofnoiseIcouldhearEnreed.Thevoiceofthevisitor
wasbreaking.//out.irehurt..iregha.s..ss-wasshouting.Shouting.Insectsinthesoul.Mind
lascerating.Opanicofinsectsloud.Crickets.Termites.centipieds.cakllinglaughing.Caklinglaughing.The
sickmanpossessed.Thesickmanpossessed.Breakingvoices.Out.Out

Silemce.Symens.silence.

Nothing.
194

Coming

Absce

195

Book2

Kolchescowasvomitinguntothebed.Bentovernaked,hisspinelikeaneel,squirmingunderhisskin.
Vomitingloudly,greenandblackfoamandsludge.Eyesrolledupintoheadexposingonlybloodred.
Lye-domtheexorcistcrashedhisheadrepeatedlyintothebrickwall.Inhisheadonlyahauntingpiano
motif,repeatingsadnessanderoticexpulsion.Hehadahardon.bloodpouringoutinsteadofsperm.
Thewholeroomwasscreamingonanotherfrequency.Kolchescowasstillretchingterribly,backalmost
breaking.Thebangingofthedoor.Thebangingontheblackenedwindows.Lye-domfinallycollapsed,
brokenskullandthickblooddraggingdownthewallwithhiscorpse.Theonlylastmovementwasa
spasm.Theonlysoundisvomiting.Thenthewindowbrokeopen.Blackbloatedgoldfishesswamin,
hysterical.Attachedthemselvestotheblackanddarkgreensludgeofvomit.Tothecrimsonmessoffat
boneandblood.Theysuckedattheslimymess,tailswagginglikehappydogs.
196

Kolchescostoppedvomiting.Hiseelspinestoppedmoving,atwistedcrookeddeadsnake.Hisskin
contortedandtautandwrinkledsuddenlyasofgreatage.Hiseyesremainedopenandred.Kolchesco,
inaFetalpositionstoppedmoving.Theroomfellsilent.Thefishessloweddown.Thenonebyone,they
burst.Pregnantstomachbreakingoutintothousandsofcleartransparenteggs.Amillionbubblelike
eggsdistortingandmagnifyingthehorrorsoftheroom.Therestofthevomitandbileandbloodand
shitcreptandescapedintotheeggs.Theeggssquirmedagainsteachother,completelyfillingtheroom
bynow.Asealedroomfilledwithtiornpiecesoffloatingblackskinsofgoldfishes,theireggsseededby
thegrotesqueremainsofkolchesco,theprisonerandlye-domthepriest.Thedeadformsofthetwoand
thesuddenpresenceotheburningformofabook.Thisroomhathbecomeanexus.Thebeatingheart
ofacitydeportedintomadness,intotheshriekingillnessofitsownmindandsoul.

Acrossfromthebuilding,cursedwiththewomb-roomofdeadkolchescoandlye-dom,thefirst
responderswatchedandwaited.Theirfirstordersweretocontainthebuildingandthetwistedpowers
thatresonatedfromit.Immediately,theyfeltthegreatdrainoftheact,forthepowerthathadbuilt
itselftherefromthedeathswasfargreaterthantheimaginationsofthefirstresponders.Inabuildingat
theoppositeend,anintercessionalteam,FIELDXobserved,tounderstand,todefusethesituation.
Decorus,thethird,wasthefieldcommanderandhewasunusuallyanxious.Hisgenerals,ORATIOUS,
thedisembodiedandJUSTICETHORN,thedeviantstudiedtheuncertainbehaviouroftheirSaent.He
spoke,butitwashardtotellifitwastohisgeneralsortohimself.Hespokewithcalculation,asifeach
wordwouldhelpunderstandtheeventsthathastranspired.
themanghos-hauswasnottobe,takensoearly.Thebookwasnotsupposedtobelostatthisstage.
Hepointedtotheblasphemedbuilding,Thisiswhatitreaps.
whathashappenedhere?oratiousasked.
Kolchescosalter-magewasghos-haus.Ghoswasnotkilledinhisworld.hewastaken.Possessedbya
maliczeitgeist.Itwasboundbythebookofonethousandonehundredandwiththebooklost,the
rupturehashelpedthishigh-spiritescape.Usingthealreadypowerfulghos,itdrewthepriestlye-dom,
oneofthegreatestlivingexorcistofourtime,tothehausofkolchaescoandthenkilledhim..Iamnot
surewhatelsehastranspired.Thishasnothappenedbefore.Itismybeliedthatthisspirithasbecome
likeagodanditsfirstcreationishibernatingactivelyinthatroom.
sowetakeitout.JUSTICETHORNsaid,alreadyarmedwithsixwaramulets.
wecannot,Decorusexplained.thisistheblackartsof1000.100.wecannotwarwithmagicwedont
understand.
thenwhichteamcan?
noneofus.Notinthisnexus.Decoruspaused,thinkingthroughhisfinalstatementcarefully.Thenhe
said,WehavetocallupontheHauseofFATHforhelp.
197

Abovethebuildings,inthepollutedanddrunksky,thedeath-shipsarrived,onebyone.Whalelike
creaturesthatcircledthecursedneighbourhoodbelowlikesharksdrawnbythesmellofblood.Its
hungerammasedrestlesslightning.Redchurningcracklesofenergy,erraticelectricprowlingattheedge
ofapocalypse.Thesmellofburntcorpsesrodeinwithawindthickwithdreadfulweight.Thegazeof
Decoruswasfixedontothedeath-shipsandtheeerielightningthatlititsgrotesquebodies.Ihad
dreamtofthis.Hesaid,afatherandachilduponamountain,watchingthedeathshipsfallslowly
fromthesky.Andthefatherliedtohisgirlabotherhermother.Shewasnotinanotherrplacethey
couldntvisit.Shewastodieupononeofthoseshipsastheycrashed,likeslowdrunkanimalsintothe
sea.ItwasadreamaboutadireNovemberthatwastocome.Thedirenovemeberthatisalreadyhere.
Wemustreturntothemotherfield.WemustseektheblessingsofLOCUSforourjourneynext.asthe
threedepartedfromthebuilding,ORATIOUSincantedfortwomoreresponderstothesceneandMR
Thornbeganamentalritual,callinguponthemakeoffivemoreamulets.

THEMOTHERFIELD>OFFICEOFLOCUSTHEFIRST>

Elevenstonesroseuponthewallinthehallofmysteris.Threefiressetuntothenorth,southand
easterndoorways.Sootcoveredthewhitemarblefinishingofthehall.Inthecentre,uponawhite
bed,weptaqueeninfuneralclothes.shewhosewombisgiftedbythedaemonoroherimmaculate
handsinherface,skinburningwithtears.Bythebedside,satSaentLOCUSthefirst.inaposture,
troubled,aweightuponhisback.StandingbeforehimwasDecorus.

198

theHauseofFATH?hesaid/hewasnotreadytoacceptthis.doyourealizewhatkindofcoupis
happeningintheHauseofFath?
wehavenochoice.SaidDecorus.
theirfourthbrotherhasbeenresurrected.ThehausehathbroughtforthFATALIS.Anexecutionwill
soonbeinorder.BloodwillbeshedinthehauseofFATH.Andyouaretellingmetoseektheirhelp?
Whatothersolutionistheremybrother?IbelievethatFINNUS,THEMADhasenoughpowertodeal
withamadnesssuchasonethousandonehundredthroughtheirhaus,andifhewerenotso,his
brotherFACTIOUS<THEDIVINEDwillaugmentthehausewithalongerlineageofpowerfromtheir
above.
Decorus,Thereisanerrorinthehauseoffathandyoudonotunderstanditsnature.Nohelpshallbe
askedofthem.Thisismyfinaljudgement.
Resigned,DECORUSaskedforthenextlineofaction.
seekthewomanofORDOM.SheowesadebttotheMYSTERISFIELDSandhertimeforpaymenthas
come.Findyourothernomadandgoforth.Ishallgrantyousafepassagetotheplaceofsoilandgravel.
Donotfailmedecorus.Thefigureofsaulisnolongerathand.Thepowersorordomareouronlyhope
left.Donotfailorelsefailswithyourfailure.
Decorusbowedtohiselderbrotheranddeparted,leavingtheweepingqueenandLocusalone.

Thewomanwasstillweepingassheslowlyremovedherclothes.Locusallowedhisrobetofalland
soughtthefireoftheeast.Thetonguesleaptontohisoutreachedarmsandmoveduptohisnaked
form.Thefireinscribedhisskinwithvariousordersandmaps.Thewomantooktheburningbodyof
decorusandbeganmakinglovetoit,setaflame.Inecstacy,decorusprophesiedwithinandsetanew
ritualofunderstandinginmotion.Thetearsofthewomanturntosmokeintheflames.Heinhaleditlike
adrugaddict,consuminghersorrow,herimagination,herknowledgeoflifeanddeathANDOTHER
WORLDS.ThefireoftheeastcompletedItstaskandfadedaway.Thewomanstonguecooledhisskin.
Aninnocencechargedwithsadness,birthingcompassion.Shekissedhissearedwoundsgingerly.She
touchedhimgently,tracingthemapsonhisbodywithherfortunedfingers.Intheroomofoccurrences,
setbehindthenorthernfire,themarkersandtotemsbeganshifting.Thepaintingschangedimagesand
themirrorsreflectedalienplaces.AnothertidechangesindireNovember.Anotherrealityunfolds.

LocusthefirstDRIFTEDINTHEARMSOFTHEWOMAN,greatlaybrinthsforminginhishead.Hewas
movingbacktohissource,toseethingsfromagreaterheight.Thetablewasbeforehimasthevisions
overtook.Madeofametalunknowntoman,thewrithing,castratedgroinofthemonsterTIRwas
spillingglowingredsemen.Hebecameachannelinthevisions,andwiththewrithingthing,hewrote
199

anddrewuponthecanvasofseeing.Nolongerincontrolofhisconsciousness,heallowedthepowers
heworshippedtoformmeaningsoutofallaccidentsinallplacesandsituations.Thegreathouseswere
formedfirst.THEFIELDSOFMYSTERISANDITSENGINEFIELDX,THEHOUSEOFFATHANDTHEHOUSE
OFFATH,THESEWERETHEKEYHOUSESINTHEUNIVERSEOFTHEFIELD.UPONSOILANDSANDWERE
THEHOUSESOFGHOS,THERESSURECTIONCRISISMOTELANDOFORDOM.THEREWASTHENAFIGURE
DRAWN.SURROUNDEDBYTHREESYMBOLS.OF1000.100,VAULTMANDTHEREDPYRAMID
(PYRAMIND)THEFIGURESPOKETHUS

SOWNSEEDSOFTHRICEYEARSPAST
RISETHECONSEQUENCEOFSALVATION
ARUPTUREFEDTHROUGHTHEREDDIVERTED
ASOLEMNMOONDECLINES
ANDTHEDEADRETURNANDOTHERMENTAKEN
THEDESTRYOERCOMES,ASDOTERRORANDSTRIFE
THEDEVILSUNRISES
SCORCHINGMEMORYANDFATE
THESTONESONTHEWALL,ABOLISHED
SATELLITESCREAMING
THECHILDCRIESINTHEARMOFAWIDOW
ASCENDED,HEWHOISPRAYEDFORMSUTRETURN
OFTHETEXTSTOLEN,FOUNDTHEYBE
ORATERRORGREATERTHANANEND
SHALLBORNEAPANICCREATION
ANDSHEOLSHALLSHYFROMTHISOTHERNIGHTTIME

THEGREATWORDSOFTHEFIGUREWERECHARGEDANDCHARMED
EACHEXISTENTIALLINEALTEREDTHETHIRD.INANOETICRUPTUREABLACKCIRCLEISDRAWNAROUND
THERESSURECTIONCRISIS.THESIGNOFTHEDESTRYOERISDRAWNBELOWIT.APROFOUND
BLASPHEMA,ABOVE.THEN,INBLINDINGLIGHT,ALISTWASMADEBUTTHENAMESCOULDNOTBE
200

READ.EACHNAMEFORMEDINTOITSSIGIL.THESIGILSRANDDOWNLIKEALONGLINEOFFORMULAE.
THESIGIILSSURROUNDEDTHEMAPOFTHEHOUSES.THESEWERETHENAMESTHATCONTAINEDIT.
THESEARETHENAMESTHATPROTECTIT.THESEARETHENAMESTHATWILLBRINGITALLTOLIFE.A
RIFTISDRAWNRIGHTDOWNTHEMIDDLE.ACURSELIKETHREAT.APROMISEOFAPOCALYPSE.THE
ENTIREOUTCOMEWRITBYTHEHANDOFTHETHIRDPOSESSED,FORMEDAMETA-SYMBOLANDIT
BEGANSPINNING,SLOWLYTHENSPEEDINGUP.ITSINTENSITYBUILT,THEWRITHINGTHINGINTHEHAD
OFTHEFIRSTWITHEREDANDWASEATENAWAYBYTHEVORTEXMADEMANIFESTBEFOREIT.LIGHT,
CONSCIOUSNESSANDTHEVISIONENDEDATTHEAPEXOFTHESPINNINGWHEEL.LOCUSCLIMAXED
REPEATEDLYINTOTHEWOMANWHOWASNOWWAILINGLIKEABANSHEEANDAGODDESS.

THEYEAROFWRITINGOMANDA

AsnarratedintothePhoneJournalofMaraleboro

Twoevesbeforetheendofequara
201

Iwokeupwithastarttomyownorgasm.Asuddenrushupmyspine.Dizziness.Euphoria.Isuckedinair
asifIhadnotbreathedforcenturies.Liferushedtomyhead.Disoriented,Ilookedaroundand
foundmyselfaloneinacabinonatrain.Iwaswet.Strangelyexhaustedandcollectedmyself.Tryingnot
tofreakout.TheorgasmwasamazingbutIdonotrecallwhatorhowithadcomeabout.Therewasno
dream,oratleastIhadcompletelyforgottenitbutIfeltthepresenceofamanholdingmeinbed.I
thoughtabouthimagain.Ithoughtabouthiminthebathroom.Deadinhisvomitandfeacesandblood
andpills.Istruggledtoblockitoutagain..Itouchedmyself,stealingonelastshiveringhigh.Itooka
deepbreath.InthedarkofthetrainIchangedmypantiesandsankbackintothebed.Ithoughtabout
whatwasahead.

ImtravelingtothevillageofATONtofindamyth.Amythtoreshapemeanewafterleavingeverything
elsebehind.Ithoughtaboutthosethingsonthetrainasidroppedtheyellowpillsintothewhiskey.i
thoughtofmyguitarist-husbandsdeathfromtheneedle.Ithoughtaboutthebandfallingapart.About
mywritinglifeatANTAbooksandthedrasticsellingofmyposessionsandhouseinthelastdays.
EverythingthenhadbecomeaballofburningmemoryanditateawayapartofmyheartandsoulasI
ritualizedit.Thereisavoidwithinmenow,avoidIhopethecityofATONwillfill.Ihadlongheard
aboutthiscity,beingsetinthelastquadrantoftheQuaarantzone,inthenorthoftheisland-city
EQUATA.ItisthequadrantclosesttotheseaofARgheandthesacredtowerof71.Ipromisedmyselfa
visittothetower,becauseitbelongstopartofthemyth,buttovisitsuchaplace,Ihadtobeinitiated
completelyintotheautobiographicalmysteriesanditwasstilltooearlyinmylifeofwrittomakesucha
movement.IhadalifethenandintheplacewhereIamtogo,anotherlifeistoberebuilt.Myemotions
weremixedasthetraintraveledwest,withaconquistadorsheartandadiscovererspresentbut
subduedfearoftheunknown.Idrankuptheflowersinthewhiskeyforitgavemestrengthofwilland
theghostofdeterminationandthoughtaboutthecityofANTON.Partofmyexpectationoftheplace
wasbuiltbythebooksIvereadabouttheplaceandthestoriestoldtomebyalonglostfriend.Iknew
herasJaqieDaniellabackindayswhenIstillreadpoetryinthebarsofmyhometown.Thiswasyears
beforeshewasexiledtoANTONadterapparentlybeingaccusedofkillinghertycoonhusbandforhis
money.Tohim,shewastheactress-sex-slave-poethepaidforhandsomely.Toher,hewasabrutalman
whofinancedtheshiftinherrevolutionarysoulwiththemoneyhegaveherforhighgradechemicals.
Shewasbothanextremeaddictandprolificstageactress.AstarlingFrench-beautywiththeintellectual
veracityofacontroversialphilosopher.Shehadonceclaimedimmortalalityand,onsomelevel,I
completelybelieveher.shewasbothalostsisterandashininginspirationandshewantedtomeetme
inthecityofATON.Ihadnotseenherinsixteenyears.Sheisnotentirelypartofmypastbecauseshe
isonlyinfluencedinspiritandfromaremoteplace.Sheexistsinmemoryandsoontobeintheflesh.I
neednoteraseherfromhistorygforshebelongsinahistoryyettobewritten.Shebelongsinthemyth
ofOMANDAE
202

Phonejournalentryeleven.

Finalnightofequara.

Ihadfinishedthepillsbeforethemidnighthourhadcome.Sixpagesoftheintroductiontoomadaewas
donebeforeIrealizedthattherewasnopointstartingonthebookwhenmyplaceofpowerhadnot
beenbuiltyet.InmycorrespondenceswithJaqie,shetooldmeofamovingcompany,whosechief,a
MisterFAR,hadconnectionswithobjectsofpowerthatsuitedavarietyofpeopleincludingmykind.
Sheofferedmetobringmetohimandknewthenthatthingswouldeventuallycomeintobeingandinto
place.IhadthemapofATONandstudieditagainafteropeningmylastbottleofwhiskeyandpouring
outmyfirstdrinktothelasthoursofequara.AsIdrank,IrecalledthewritingcovenIwaswiththeyears
before,ofthelesbiansexwehadtogetherbeneaththefullmoonwhenonetimeendedandanother
began.Ipaytributestothosememories.Thosewordscreatedoutoforgyandecstacy.Ofthethrillof
bringingthosewordsintomanifestationonthemakeshiftstage.Ofthecandlelightsandthe
searchilightsonfullasthelastandfirsthourpassed.IthoughtaboutJaqieandhernakedformand
wonderedifwecouldsleepwitheachotherlikewedidonthatnight,inthesecredwritroomofthe
coven,longafterourothersistershadpassedoutfromthechemicalsandlongardousworld-love-myth
making.
IrunthroughtwomoreglassesbeforeImcompelledbyphilosophicalmusings.Ipenneddownmy
thoughtsclosetothehouroftheendofanera.whatlullsawomantoherpregnancygrounds?What
callwouldtaketomakeapoetintoamotherintoachildlivinglifeinwrit?thequestionsandanswers
wereunravelinginacomplexun-uniformspeed.ParalleltimelinesemergedinwhatIfeltandthoughtof.
Isuddenlycravedthearmsofawomansuchasjaqie.Eveyrthingseemspossiblenowthateverything
elseisnomore.
Dayone.Post-equara.

Ionlyhadonedufflebagwithmeanditwasheavywithachangeofclothes,keybooksofmylife,
writinginstruments,semi-usedleatherboundwrite-booksandassortedcandlesandbottlesof
blackenedpencilshavingsformyrituals.Ihadtinsoffoodandplastic-bottledwaterforthelong
travelingandnotallofthemwereusedup.IfiguredIhadaboutawekeorsooffoodleft,notthatitwas
alotbutbecauseIatelessandlesseachday.Atinofbeanswouldlastmetwoandahalfdaysnow,and
hardenedcheesebreadcouldgoforfourdaysifIkeptitright.
ThestationattheedgeofATONcitywasthemostnotorious.Immediatelyuponalightingthetrain,I
couldsmellthevisceralgutsofthecityandnoamountofwordsorimaginingsIhadpriortoarrivalcould
203

matchthesheerrealityherebeforeme.therewassex,drugsandmiraclesintheair.Poetry,music,
massacreandfood.Evenatfourinthemorning,thestationwasbusy.Morepeoplenolongersleephere,
Jaqihadwritten.Mostpeoplearemostpowerfulatnight.Itsakindofnocturnesickness.Likeglamorous
vampiresfromtimesend.Acancerousfeverthatkiiledlifeofthesunandmadethenightofmoonsinto
glorifiedexistence.sheisalwaysapoet.Inthewordsshechoseandexpressed.Herpenandpaperlife
wasthebloodthroughwhichheranimalisticbodymovedwiththegraceonstage.Andbecauseshewas
asrealasthehalogenlightsthatlittheplatform,hermagicwasalsoasrealasherflesh.Thepeople
worshippedherlikeadrugandtheydied,fictionallyandmetaphorically,likejunkieswhenshehadto
vanishinexile.Ilovedthetragedyofherdeparture.Ilovedthatsuchawomancoulddosuchthings.I
lovedthecultureshekilledandthecultureshebringswithherinherheart.Tomesheismysteryand
psychosis.Abridgeintoallofmytomorrows.

Iroamedthestation,readingallthetorncolorfuladspastedontothestationwalls.Theysoldsexand
guns,magicalfurniture,,petsandexoticfoods.Someflashedvehiclesandroomsforrent,theater
placesandcinema-likeshootinggrounds.pleasureyourloverwithbladesbringhomeawildemu
thatguardsyouownpartofthestatueofizettecelebritywallpostersforsaletarot/saulareadings,
spellcasting,magickalobjects,seances.@theGHOS~HAUS.induceselectiveamnesia.Theadswent
onandonthroughoutthestation.Eachadopeningupstrangevistasinme.thiswasnotacommoncity.
Thiswasfringeandtabooandotherworldly.Jaqihadtoldmeallthisbeforebutlivingithereandnow
wasstarklydifferent.Baskerscrowdedcertainentrancestocertaonittunnelsthatledtootherpartsof
thecity.Beggarswaitiedlimblessbytheescalatorsthatbroughtpeopletotheuppergrounds.Ifound
mywayaroundtothesafeboxesinthebowelsofthestationanddugmyraincoatjacketforthekey.
Jaqi,inourlastcorrespondencebeforeIleftforthiscity,toldmeshedleaveapackagetohelpme
settleinuntilshewasdonewithherengagementandcouldlookmeuphere.Shesentmetheletter
withthekey.

Ifoundthesafeboxandopenedit.
Init,aleergewhiteenvelopepregnantwithwhatfeltlikepapers
TherewasalsoashoeboxanditwasheavywhenIremovedit.

Openalltnheseinthemotel.Anotesaidundermynameonthefrontoftheenvelope.

Muchhaschangedsincewevewritten.

204

Istuffedeverythingintothebag,threwthekeysinandshutthesafebox,sealinginnothingnessand
bringingtheneweverythingwithme.

ThestationsatattheedgeofthecityATON.Toreachthemotel,Ihadtowalk,awayfromthefirstmain
road,throughthetransvestitesstreets.Icouldalreadycatchsightofthefirstfewwhoventuredoutside
theirstreetstryingtocapturebusinessfromthefirstmainroad.
Atallslenderonesashayedtome.youthereluv!,doyouwanttobeamanwhoisawomanorbewith
awomanwhoisaman?
Ijustsmiledathim,georgeous,womanlyhim.
Therightpricegetsyouwhatyouwantluv.
Imjustpassingthrough,thankyou.youarereallybeautiful.
manyblessingsuponyouthen.Beyoumanorwoman,itisyourembryothatexcitesthestreets!she
sashayedaway.Icouldnotknowwhathemayhavemeant.Itisyourembryothatexcitesthestreets.It
stuckwithmeasIenteredthemouthofthepaththatwouldleadmetothewhorestreetsrunning
paralleltothehostofmotelsalongthesecondmainroad.Tothemotelwhereiwouldstay.

TheyallcameoutoftheirflambouyanthousesasIpassedthrough.Pasthousesofstoneandfeather
boasfusedintothewalls,ofglitterballsandstagefronts,fairytalecastlesandrainbowbrightporches.
Loveseatsbuiltintoswings,largespapoolswithpinkbubblingwater.sweetchyldeofdeath,youneed
awomanwhoisaman.Somecalled,itseemsliketheirmaincallline.holybeyourskinandthewords
fromyourmouth,lickingthewoundsofmyheart.theyweregettingexpressive,excessive.Didthey
behavethiswaybecauseIamawoman?
Someseemedsad,someseemedjoyful.Otherswatchedmesilentlywhichinawayscaredmealittle.
Thewaytheywerelookingatme,asiftheywerereadingmemorethanobserving.Whatdidtheysee?
dotheyseemeagrieflesswidowwhodoesnotmournherhusbandstragicdeath?Dotheyrecognize
meinsoulbecausetheyhavereadmyworkinbackdatedmagazinesstrewnacrossthebedstheymake
lovein?
Isawahookervomitingbythesideofadrain,herpinp,abigbaldmancomfortingherwithwords,its
ok,everyonegetssickthefirsttimetheydoit.Yooullgetusedtoit..someofthegirlsjusthadtolook
atmeandIwouldgrowwetwithneed.Someweremorevocal,come.Comewithme.mytongueis
magic,mytongugeiseden.Someevenheldmehands,pulledmyraincoattotheirway.Ideclined
themallnicelyasIcould,tellingthemIwasjustpassingthrough.Wasthereawhore-poetamongthese
girls?Scribblingfuriouslybetweensessionsofsexwithstrangemen?themotherwouldbepleased
205

withyouonesaid,hersmilemademyheartwarm.Agroupofgirlswereeatingawhitecreamcake,
lickingtheirlips.Iwonderedifitwaspartoftheiract.Groupssofdarkskinnedmenstoodaround
watchingthegirlsposeandmodelthemselves.Iwalkedonpastthem,theweightofmybagmademy
heartpumpharder,thewalkingsuddenlyseemedendlessbutmeditative.Icouldfeelmyselfbeinglulled
intosomekindofsomnambulism.Amixofemotionsfedthesestreets.Satisfactionanddesperation,the
exchangeofcurrencyforjoybutitwasmorethanjustsexthesegirlswereoffering.Itwasmomentsof
creating,thetrainingofthemagicalmalewill,directingthepowerofthewandintothereceptacleofthe
universe.Andtheysaythatallmagichasaprice.Ishookmyselfoutofthesethoughtsandwas
immediatelyalarmed.Thosethoughtswerenotmine.ItseemedlikeIwaswalkingforhoursbuttheend
ofthestreetwasnotnear.

Itisgoodyouhavearrived
Thiscitycannotevolverightlywithoutyou
Yourroomisalreadyawaiting
Thetoproomatresurrectioncrisis
NexttowherethemanIlovedhathreturned
Youshallrebirth
Youshallholdthehandofladyavo
Speakfortheotherthingsincrisis
Leadthewarfromhometohome
Bringsalvationtoderangements
Bethebridgebetweenwrittenrivers
206

Befevered,nolongeryourself
Andfindanothernameinanotherlifesosecret

Note#
Attheendofthewhorestreets,thereisaclubcalledORDOM.Havedirnksthereat10pmandIwillcome
toyou.speaktoasmanydenizensoftheplaceasyoulike,foritisahavenforourkind.

Phonejournalfourteen.

PasttheyearofEquarasend,IfoundaroomintheneighbourhoodofATON,inaboardingmotelcalled
theresurrectioncrisis.Itwasabrownninestoreybuilding,builtwiththesand-llikeashesofbehemoth
creaturesslainbythehandofJVHNtheresurrected.Itsoccnstructionanddesignwasconceivedby
extraterrestrialintelligences,operatingfromatemple-satelliteknownasAi-Fi.Eachfloorhadthree
roomswithatotalof27whoserootnumberisnine.Setinablockshapedbuilding,rectangular
windowslookedouttothefourstreetsthatranouttohenortherm,southers,easternandwestern
lands..Onlyoneentrance.Hiddenbehindawallofmakeshift4X8panels,whitewashedandinscribed
withvarioussigils,spellbindsandoccultsymbols.Myroomwasonthetopfloor,nexttotheunoccupied
roomfabledtohavebroughtbackthelostshaman,Saul.Themotelkeepermentionedthatan
occurrencewaspresenttwonightsbeforemyarrival,andthat,althoughabandonedforseveralyears
andleftcompletelyempty,itwasasifitsvanishedoccupanthadreturnandhadtakensomething.Thgis
hadaleteredthepsychicnatureofthebuildingandthemotelkeeperhadwarnedmeaboutitsimpacton
theconsciousnessofhisoccupants.Istilltooktheroombecausetherewasnoothersuitedplacetowrite
thebookofORMAND

IttookthreenightstotransportcertainbooksfromthestoreFickatabecause,accordingtoitsowner
MonseiurEnreed,acomplicationhadoccurredaweekpreviousandhaddisruptedtheenergiesofthe
mythicalstore.WhenIwasthere,Inoticedthewindowswereboardedup,andEnreedwasnotinhis
naturalstate.Hewasvisiblyshakenfromwhateverhadoccurredandhekeptthecompanyofaneven
strangerman.Alankyelderlyman,tallasaneretree,agraveandstately.Thoughhispresenceseemed
commandeering,therewasalostbeaconinhiseyes.Adivertedsenseoflife,aconfusedrealism
207

seethingwithin.IaskedEnreedwhathadtranspiredandhetoldmethattheATONSforemostauthority
onthepsychicarts,areaderofthetarotandthesaulahadgonemissing,havingdisappeared,ortaken
abruptlybysomeotherforcethathadleftseveralbooksinthehouseoffickata,burntbeyondsalvaging.
Itwasaterribleminuteofblackmadnessthelankymansaid.Hedidnotwishtogivemehisname,and
calledhimselfthevisitor.Ipolitelydeclinedanofferoftea,purchasedthebooksIrequiredformy
writingandbadethemonsieurandthevisitorgodspeed.Thecurrentartifacttransportersforthecityof
EquatawasnotpresentandIhadtocompromisebytheusingtheserviceofanotherprovider.Having
towaitthreenights,IspentthefirstdiscoveringtheneighborhoodofATON,discovering,forthefirst
time,itstwisted,otherworldlyenvirons.

IspentthefirstnightwanderingthevastaislesandfloorsofUSTACENTRE,amulti-level,multi-persona
shoppingcomplexjustoppositetheresurrectioncrisis.Ihadpurchasedpillsfromthevoices[in]
pharmaceuticaandaboxofnicotinepatches.Goingdownalevel,Ifoundthealcoholsection(after
walkingthroughtheleatherbootsandshoessection)andboughtagedwhiskeyforthenightsaheadin
themotel.dontgodrinkingoutaloneyoungladytheoldmanbehindthecountertoldme,thereare
violentthingshappeninginthecity,unliketheusualviolence.Takecareofyourlife.Iwill,thankyou.
therearedrinkingtablesafloordown.Asectionforsmoking.Youllbesaferthere.Itwasalmostasif
hewassendingmeastrongmessagenottowandertonight.Idontsmokeanymorebutyes,Imaydrink
downstairsorbackatthemotel.Thankyouagainkindsir,.
HesmiledasIwent.Idecidedtoexplorethedrinkingsectionofthemall.ItwastherewhereImetthe
drunkhomelessmanwhotoldmeoftheviolencewarnedbythedrinksseller.

Hedirty,shabbydrunkcalledhimselfMonroe,afteramanoftwistedmyth,heexplained.Ithought
aboutmarilyninstead.Thedrunkcalledouttomewithadesperatekindofneedinhiseyes.Aneedto
talk,tosharehistroublesandstoriesoflife.TherewasnothingmuchelseIcoulddoonthefirstnightso
Idecidedtolettheoldmanentertainme.anythingwouldbeinterestingcomingfromsomeonewho
lookedlikehimIthought.Irespectedthebums,notfortheircircumstancesbutfortheirexperience
unsharedbyspoiltsociety.IopenedupmyboxofpillsandpouredoutthewhiskeyintoaglassIrented
fromthebarforfiftycents.Ipaidadollarmoreforice.Thedrunkoldmanstartedtoramble.soole
billybobfromuptherekeepsyousafedownherewithbobbillyeh?helaughed.youtwohaverthe
samenamesreversed?ofcoursemelady,ofcourse,arentwebrothersthenyea?Ahahaha!hewas
anadorablejollyanddirtydrunk.Icouldseesoilcakedonhisalreadybrownjacket.bethetoldyeof
violencenowdide?alittlebityes.ahawhawhaw!Alittlebitisntenoughnowisityoungladyeh?
Yougotacuriousmindosweet?Amindthathungersfortruth?Perhapsperchanceyouareawriter?
Toilingatyourwordstoarriveatthecruxofthematteraye?Huahhahhah!hetookalongswigfrom
cheapchampagne.Hesuddenlyleanedclosetome,asiftotellmeasecret.Andhedid.threemurders
inaweekyes?Twoarenotfromdownhere.HereImean.TheWORLD!notfromthisworld!wahhaha
haha!
208

thatsenoughbobbillyitwashisbrother.myapologiesmlady.Mybrotherenjoysscaringthe
touristswithurbantales.CouldIofferyouanescortbacktothemotel?thehourisgettingmuchlate
andIbelieveyoumustberesting.Iwasalittleconfusedatfirst.ItwasstillearlyIthought.ThenIhad
becomesudden;yverytiredandIcheckedthetime.Fivehourshadgonethesunwasabouttorise.I
lookedacrossatbobbillyandhewasgrinninghisdurnkgrin.hadtheTIMEofyourlife?heasked.
enough.brother.thentome,come.HeheldouthishandandItookitwithoutthinking.Itifeltsafe.
IcouldseeafadedUSMCtattooonhisarm.

Wewalkedoutintoalightdrizzlecomingdownfromagreymorningsky.Strangely,Ihadapparently
finishedonebottleandhalfaboxofpills.Billybobwashelpingmecarrybackthebagwiththe
remainderofgoodsbought.Wecrossedovertothemotelsurroundedbythosewhitewashedfaade.
ThesymbolsonthemseemedtohavechangedbutIcouldnotexactlypointoutwhat.Myheadwas
cloudy.IfeellikeIhadtakenagreattollthatthenighthadsuckedoutmostofmyenergieswithoutme
realizinghowmuchtimeandenergyhadbeenspent.Astrangemorningandevenstrangernight.I
vaguelyrecalledseeingthemotelkeeper.Itwashardertoseewhenwereachedmyfloor.LastthingI
knewwaswatchingbillybobleavetheroom,thelightsoutcurtainsdrawnandblackness.Adeepdark
sleep.

Beforethedreamsbegan.

Thedestroyeriscoming.Thisthunderstormisonlyhersign.Thisfuneralprocession,hersymbol.Mara,
thedestroyeriscomingandIfidontreachtheheadofthisprocessionfastenough.Everyoneherewill
die.Itshardtobreatheinthissaddeningcrowd.Allthefansindesperatemourning,unsureofwhatto
makeofthestarsunexpecteddeath.Themediahasalreadyformedthetruth.Killedbycardiacarrest
fromoverworkingthecentralEquatatours.Thecirclesknowtheothertruth.Elevenstabwoundstoa
bodydevoidofblood,savethemessthatsoakedhisoldwhitebeardturnedred.Onaheaderected
uponanaltarinhisownhall,sittingonapileofhisgranddaughtersunderwear.Thatwashowshefound
grandpa,hisbodynowhereelsetobeseen(headless,solemnonthebedinthemasterbedroom,
dressedinhisdeadwifespetticoat.Hishandswereboundclaspedtogetherinprayingposition.Bound
withthesteelguitarstringscutfromhisstageguitar.
209

Ithinkthesethings,squeezingmywaythroughthecrowds.Thethoughtsofthewaymyelderdied
distractsmefromtheweepingandthecongestionandtheclaustrophobiatryingtoconsumemeall
around.Ithinkofbrutaldeathtoavoidblindingpanic.Ifighttokeepmyenergiesup(unasleepforthe
thirdday)andIstruggletokeepittogether(forapartofmeisinanotherdimension.)Iamnotwhole.I
couldfallapartbutmustnot.Oreveryoneelseherewilldie.Thenuclearprocessionisstillmilesahead.
Imstilltrappedinthethrongofthousands.Ifeellikevomiting.TherainmakesmecoldandsickbutIm
moreconcernedabouttheredsandpackedinmypocket.Theeldersaregoingtoneedittostop
whateveritisthatsthreateningtokillusall.Imustreachthemfastbuttheglasscoffinofthefirstkilled
isnowherenear.Iseehisfaceonthewallscreensoneachsideofthestreets.Clipsofunplugged
sessions,theseventyyearoldsinger-songwritermoaningthedeathofhumanity,celebratingthejoysof
loveandchildren.Thatwashisoutwardlife.Thelifeheofferedtotheworld.nooneelsewouldknow
thespiritualandoccultsacrificeshemadewithhishiddenlife.Alifedrivenforthesalvationofasmany
soulsashecouldtouch.Hisroleincludedwarringforthesesoulsandinspiritualwarfare,hewasthe
eldermostfeared.Imaginethenthehorrorthatdescendeduponthecirclesafterhavingseenhowsuch
agreateldermagewarlordhasbeenbeheadedandblasphemiedagainstuponhisownmatrimonialbed.
Aterrorofgreatorderhascomeandnow,inmypanickedvisionsofthenightbefore,Ibelievethatthe
destroyerisalsocoming.

DECORUS,THETHIRD,ANDTHEJOURNEYTOORDOM

Themeninblackonthestagehadhairlikewomenandtheirfaceswereallglowingadirtywhite,likea
sickyellowlightinadarkhospital.Themusictheymadewasthemarchintoblackdisturbedplaces.The
industrialdrumming,suicideinspiredlyrics,acreepinghypnoticbassline.Songsforghostradiosand
crammeddancefloorsofthefetishists.Inthegothic-BDSMCLUBofORDOM,thenightof
bodyencasementisbuildingup.menandwomenmummifiedbybiggrotesque,nakedfiguresinleather
masksandironmaidens.Themeninblackonstageplayon.

Itishotandsweatyandorgiasticinthehallofordom.Themonstrousspeakersscreamingouttortured
guitarsandhighstrungviolins.Thereislittlespacetomoveasmaskedhalfnakedorgrelikehumanscart
aroundmenboundinpvcstraightjackets,divingsuits,hentairopewhilethewomenarecrammednaked
intocagessuspendedfarabovetheravingcrowd.TheGothsandwarlocksraisetheirarmsbeneaththe
darkmoon,suspendedlikeanancientproprhighabove.Ablackandredlightglowsfromitasifitwasa
rockfromablackvolcano.Inritualthemastersdance,stampingfeetliketheshamansoftheoldworld
tothepregnantbeatofatribaldrum.Everythingappearsslowmotiontodecorus.ToJusticeThorn,he
210

sensesthepresenceofthereddust,ofhighhallucinationsandamphetaminenightmaresunfurlingin
theenergieslikeblackkaliinIndianfumes.Wildthingshangfromthechains,howlingintothecrowds.
Thereisecstacyinthisterror,bleedingblissinthischaos.Womeninfurswhipmeninanimaltightsin
jailcellsbuiltintothewallsoftheclub.Swirlingmanicbeatsfloodthecells,thehall,everyinchofspace,
inthehead.Buildingintoaclimacticexplosion,ofathousandhorsesrunningondrybrokenlands
straightatyou.thepowershereareoverwhelming,evenforamanwithastaturelikedecorus,butthis
washowthepeopleofsoilandsandreleasedthemselves.Thiswaswhatrenewedsanityinaworldlong
gonemad.madnessmatureslikewiiine,madnessmatureslikewine:wailedthethemaninblackon
stage.Likeacatcryinginthedark,themansingsaboutgirlsinwindowsandbloodonthestairs.
Decorusrecognizesthisillspiritcalleddespairandfightsagainstit.Themassaroundhimsimplysoaksit
up,fightingpoisonwithpoison,neutralizingthepainwithapleasure.Throughthistwilightcrowd,
decorusseekstheladyofthistwilightplacewherehoursanddaylightsmeltandislostoutside.Like
beingburiedbeneath,thisatrocityatlantisisrichwithabysmallifeandthroughthecrowddecorussees
itsdarkmajesticqueen.Herheaddressisofblackstonesrisinglikeonathaigoddesseshead.Atowerof
crowntomarkherasthegrandcroneofthiscoven.Herlongsilkyblackhairisunnaturallyalive,
breathingdownthelongofherback.Herblackdressclingstoherpaleandslendercorpselikebody
animatingherassheslowlymovesthroughherdominion.Herblacklacedglovedhandrisesandfalls
gracefullylikethefallingofangels.Decorusalreadyunderstandsthathischargeisenchantedandthey
aremerelyfollowingherintoherlair.Themeninblackonstageplaytheirmostdespairingsong,a
hauntingtributetotheirfigureheadassheleadsthemenfromthefieldlikeablackwidowtoherwomb.
Theatmosphereisthick,likemuddyopiatesandeverythingslowsdownasifthevastlysaddenedmusic
hadslowedtheheartofordomitself.Thegreatbeastwasturningintosleepasitsmistressdisappears
behindaredvelvetcurtain.Likedeadmenfloating,fieldxfollowsherandarealtogetherlostbehindthe
veilofordom./

Shestoodbeforethemalmostnaked,exceptforhertinyredg-stringpantiesandstringbra.Herbody
wasimmaculate.Nubile,slender,shapely,erotic.Itwasherheadthatdisturbedthemmost.Theheadof
ateenagegirl,deadtoolongintheswamps.Itsatonabrokenneckwithhairadirtybrown,soddenwith
soilandtinydeadyellowleavesandcrushedflowers.Apieceofgreyducttapesealedhermouthshut.It
lookedlikeapartofherskinandnottapedover.Hereyesweregluedshut,thicktranslucenthardened
gel,likewormsburiedhereyelashes.Herskinonherfacealmostblueandblackandtherewerewounds
likeshehadbeenhitwithrocks.Driedblackbloodstainedfromhernoseandears.Herlifelesshead
lolledaboutgentlyasherperfectlowerbodymovedslowlytowardsthe,Shespoketothemintheir
heads.Asweetsadvoice,halfgirlhalfwoman.Itwashervoicethatmadetheentiresceneperfectly
wrong.thethingshesaidslowly,thethinginthebuildingpartofitishere,inthisworldisit?
Iamsorrymylady,Idonotunderstandyourquestion.
nomatter..nomatter.Bywhoseworddoyouarrivehere?
itisbythewordofLocusthatIseekyou,ladyofordom.
211

forwhatpurpose?
weseekanactofrepayment,anactrelatedtothethingthatyouspeakof.
Shetookastepback.Shemadeasoundlikeshedidwhenshewasfirsttakenbyherkillershand.
Ifear,Icannothelpyou.shesaid.
youshouldleave.SheturnedanddisappearedbehindtheJapanesescreenwhereherblackdresswas
drapedover.
wehavecomefar,mylady.Ipraythee,atleasthearwhathashappened.Aprisonerandapriesthas
beenkilled
Shespokefrombehindthescreen.Cuttinghimoff.
toommuchhasalreadyhappenedhereDecorus.Anaspectofthethinghadalreadyarrived.Your
presencehereconfirmsit.Thekillingshere,andthekillingsthatistocome,andthemissinggirl,the
missingmagician.Itisallhappeninghere.Thedeathsinyourrealmaremerelythebeginning.More
painandtortureand.rape.andmurderiscomingsomethinghasbeensetintomotionandcanno
longerbestopped.Mypowersherearefullyengaged.Icannotleavemyrealm.Icannotmake
repaymenttothehouseofmysteris.
thenletushelpyouwarwiththisthingJusticethornsaid.sincethisthingisanaspectofthegreater
thingwebattleinourfield.
this,wecannotdo,youngerbrother.Wehavenocommandoverfullpowersintheplaceofsoiland
sand.Wearehereasmessengersandescorts.DecorusturnedtotheladyofOrdom,comebackwith
usandwewarwiththisthingatthesource.
Theladylaughed.Thedeadgaggedandblindheadofthegirlrolleduponthemovingshoulders.the
houseofmysteriesisalmostasfarfromthetruthasitcanget.Thesourceisnotinthefield,decorusthe
third.Thesourceisfromaplaceoutsidebothourcontinuums.
howdoyouknowthismylady?
?mysorcerer,ElijahMonroehasjourneyedwithhisghostgimpfarintothedarkrecessesofthe
multiverse,andtheperversitythatseethestherehathgivenhimpartialknowledge.Thisknowledgeisa
partofit.Thetideofdirenovemebercomplicatesallmattersdecorus.Thehistoriesandthetextshave
toldusthistimeandagain.WewarinafarmorecomplexWarfieldthanitisexpected.Returntoyour
house,soldiersofmysteries.Tellyoureldersaentsthatneitherthefieldnorordomisenoughtostop
thisthing.Adestroyermustbecalleduponandtocallitanevengreatermagicmustbeachieved.
whatmagicisthat?
themagicof1000.100itself,anditsonlykey.Saul.ascended,hewhoisprayedfor.Absence,hewho
wastoguardthiscrossroad,guilty,hewhohathloosedthisdarknessuponus.
212

MARASDREAM

Asoratedintophonejournal.Entrysixteen.Introduction.Thisisthedreamthatchangedeverything.The
dreamthatonlyhappensinthecity,asoneofthebookshadexplained.itisthecitythatdreamsyouit
hadsaid.Thecityawakeswithinyouasyousleepandthisiswhatitcansay.

Thereisavoicethatnarratesinthedarkness.Aquestionaskedofme.wereyouscreaminginyour
motherswomb?Didyouseethefaceofthyfatherinthesafestplaceintheworld?
Iwasborneofcesariansection.Iknewmybirthwascomplicated.ButIdonotrecallmyfathersface.
Itwasnotmyvoicespeaking.Shewasanolderwoman.IdidnotrecognizehermindasmyownbutI
knewmyownemotions.Emotionsmoreintimatethanthought.Emotionsthataretrueonlytomyself.
Thiswasmewithanotherconsciousnessthatsomehowsharedmine.
Thevoicecontinued,didyounotscarealltheotherchildrenonce?Didyounotmaketheteachers
scream?
Irememberedthatday.Itwasaclassexcursiontotheaquarium.Ihadputmyhandtotheglassand
madeallthefishesfloatuptodie.Ateacherwhotouchedmebecamesick.Mymothertoldmethatday
thatIneverhadtogotoschoolagain.Thatshewouldteachme.
andthisartyoulearnisofyourownaccord?
Ididnotunderstandthequestion.
Therewasnomorevoiceafterthat.AStilldarkness.

ThenIfeltahandrunningupmylegs.Thenmorehands.Thenmanyfingersstartedtouchingme,
rubbingme,enteringme.Iknewtheylovedme,worshipedme.Iwasproudandwetandecstatic.My
owngaspingechoedinmyears,blindtoblindpassion.Thencamethebeamsoflight,piercingfrom
above.Cuttingitswaythiswayandthatlikeconcertspotlights,likeasearchlighttranceclub.Somefar
offdrummachinebeganechoing,intimewithmygasping,takingoverthenoiseofsexinmyhead.The
amphetaminerushcamenext.Reminiscentofmygigdays.Atwistedguitarcameonshrieking,wailing,
discordant.Thesearchbeamscameonstrongerandfaster.Aboveme,Ithensawthedeathships.
Formedbymyownvisionofitbutbaseduponthemyths.Thefableddeathships,likewhalesinan
emptysea/skyabove,movingslowly,searchingtheabyssforthedying.Aspotlightfoundmeandthe
213

restoftheblindnessfadedaway,blackspacefoggingintoahardermorethreedimensionalspace.I
foundmyselfonawoodenfloor,myfaceinvomit,myeyesblurred.Hundredsoflegsmovingaroundme,
hardgothmusicexplodingfromthemoenlikeblackboxspeakersabove,thefloodlightsblaredthen
wentawaythenblaredagaininacrescendoofsightandblindness.Someonewasshoutingmyname
mara!Marayouok?Mara!wha?comeongetup.itsnotevenyourturntoplayandyourealready
smashed!Itriedtofocus.Therewasayounggirlhelpingmeup.theclubwascrowdedbutIdidnot
recognizeit.Atfirstitseemedthatitwasanorangelitbar,withwoodenflorosandwalls,likeacountry
stylevarandgrill.Thenitbecamecoldandblacklikeaspacestationhall.Lightslikestarsonthewalls
moving.Likeeyeswatchinganddartingabout.ThecrowdwasaseaofblackshiningPVC.Twomen
walkedpast.Inakindofgrey,brownmonksrobes.Onlytheydidnthaveanykindoffacebondage.
Everyoneelsehadhoods,gunnysacks,ballgags,headharnesses,gasmasks,facelessmaskson.some
hadreptilianskinencasingtheirheadswithtubesrunningoutlikeorganicsnakes.Theprettygirlwho
helpedupmewasveryyoung.Tooyoungtobeinaclubbutshewasdressedforit.Awhiteshortflared
skirtthatshowedoffhertenderlegs.Atightminipink-twithacaricatureofmyfacedonepopartstyle
onit.Immortalizedwithawink,thewinkIalwaysgavemyhusbandwhenIwantedtohavesex.Thegirl
draggedmebymyarmsandwasleadingmethroughthecrowdoffreaks.youknowmynameIdont
knowyours!Ishoutedoverthederangedrockandroll.Nicole!Ornikki!:sheyelledback.comeon!
shewasexited.Herfacehighoninnocentdrugs.Shedraggedmetowardsthestage,thenpastit.Idid
notrecognizethebandonstage.Theleadsingerlookedlikehewashavinganepilepticfit.Iwasthen
pulledbackstage,behindvelvetcurtainsthathunglikealooseblackcanvas.damnit!shesaid,we
missedthepartwhereshechangesplaces!Ilooktowhereshewaspointing.Inafuneralroomwith
whitelight.Themusichadstoppedabruptly.Silencegreeted.IsawAnemptycoffinbeforeme.Ina
chairnexttoitsatadeadwoman.Headbowed,handclaspedtogetherinprayer.Shewasbentovera
little.Motionless.Nexttothecoffinonthefloorwasanelaboratemodelofaneighbourhood.Colorful
shophousesandbuildingsmadefromthefinestmaterialforminaturework.Theshophousesroseto
justbelowmyknee.Thestreetslookedliketheywererealconcrete.Thelamppostslookedlikethey
worked.Nicolewasnotwithmeanymore.Iwasalone.Withthedeadwomaninthechair.Theempty
coffin.Thesmellofplasticburningroseinmynostrils.Icouldtastetheterriblefumes.Thedeadwoman
beganspeaking.destroythemodellikeamonsteranditsparentmademanifestwillalsobedoomed.
Ahorribledreadfilledme,Istaredatthecorpseexpectingittosuddenlymove.Trappedinthatmoment
againandagain.Inthatterribleexpectationofwatchingherheadslowlylookuptome.thewall
oppositemeburst.Isawmyselfstompingthroughtheneighbourhoodlikeatemperamentalchild.Isaw
myownfaceandscreamed.Itwasahellbentface.Eyesrolledupintheheadbutobviouslymoving
arounddesperately.Longuebiggerandlongerandsharplikeasnake.Hairaterriblewildasmy
possesseddoppelgangercrushedtheshophouseslikesandcastles.Askincrawlingscreechingstarted
fromthedeadwomanslips.Centipiedscrawledoutofherdeadmouth.Somethinggrabbedmyhead,
forcedmetolook.frombehindme,twomencarryingatrashingbodywalkedpast.ItwasNicole.Naked
andboundandgaggedwithblackindustrialtape.Faceandhandsandlimbswrappedup.shewas
strugglinginthearmsofthetwohugemen.Itriedtostopthembutwasheadwascrampedsobadly,
bloodroaredinmyears.Icouldnotscreamasthementookthemuffledscreaminggirlawaythrough
theholeinthewall.Mystomachknottedandthensomethinginsidemeburst.
214

Likewakingfromabaddream,Iwasonahospitalbed,legsspreadeagled,havingamiscarriage.Pieces
ofbabywascutupandsuckedfromme.notbysomeabortionmachinebutbymyownwill.Iwas
miscarryingmybabybymyownvolitionandIwashavinganorgasm.Iwasfilledwithagreatliberating
joy.Thesurgeonswerelaughingloudlywithme.theoperatingtheatrelightsabovewasswirlinggladly.
Alienfigurescrowdedaroundmeobserving.Theytookpiecesofmydeadbaby.Somebitstheyputin
metallicjars.Otherstheyate,experimentally.Theirovalblackeyesgleamedwithavirginsexperience.
Otherbeingsstudiedthelittleorgansintheirhands.Isawsomediviningit.Readingthefutureinthe
entrailsofthefetus.Theylookedatmethenagreed.Theycametome,adeadheartintheirbloodied
handsandabovemyfacetheysqueezedit.Blodiedmeatandsquashedveinsfellthicklyintomyeyes.It
burntterriblybutburntnewsightintome.Astheoldglaringsurgicallightswaseatenawaybyblack
blood,anewskybrokethroughthebloodeatingmycornea.Serenity.Blueskies.Icouldseethesun
shiningjustoffmyvision.Grassbelowme,flowersticklingmyears/Isatup.beforemearedandwhite
coloredterracehouserisinglargerthanlifeaboveme.throughawindow,withyellowcurtainssailing
inagentlebreeze,IsawanevenyoungerNicole.Bigbeautifuleyestransfixedonherhandheld
computergame.Shewassobeautiful,angelic,innocent.Itriedgettingherattentionbygettingupand
wavingatherbutshewasnottobedivertedfromhergame.Justwatchingherfilledmewithsomuch
simplejoy.Mygladnessfilledherroom,shewasglowingwithmyhappiness.Ifedthesunandthefields
andthetreesandtheclouds.Justwatchingher,Igavelifebacktolife.Igaveparadisehername,Igave
theskieshersong.Ioutstretchedmyarmstotheheavenandthiscaughtnikkisattention.Shestopped
playing,cameuptothewindow.Shesmiledatmne,thatyoungchildloverssmile.Then,eversoslowly,
hersmilefaded.Andasitdid,thejoysfaded.Thelifefaded.Icouldfeelallofitslippingaway.No.no.
nikkisfaceturnedfromsweetinnocencetoaphantomdespair.Sheputherhandsonthewindowsill.I
startedmovingtothehouseshewasinallthewhilelookingupather.bythenIwasalreadyempty
inside.

No.

Shebegantoclimbthewindow.

No.

Raisingherlegstogetafooting,Isawstraightupherskirt.Isawherbluepanties.Thenitwasred
panties.Then
215

Sheleapt.

Twodaysbeforethefuneraloftheelder,andadaybeforeapartofhimselfwassenttoanother
continuum,Jwascollectingmoneyforthedrugs.TheNovemberstormshadcomeearly.Itwasraining
torrentiallywherejwasat.TheChinatownshophousesearlyafternoonwasstilljampackedwithtourists
andnatives.Hewaswaiting
AcrosstheHouseofWu,atacoffeeshopfilledwithalunchtimecrowd.Anervousnesswasgrowing
withinhim,notbecauseofthemagickalsubstanceswithhimthattheauthoritiesofthecityconsidered
illegal,butbecausetherewasaloomingdesperationintheair.Aconferencewascalledforthenight
before.Whilemeditatinginthethroesofthereddust,Jhadavision.Init,theChinesemidgetman
appearedtohiminhiswhitesuitandredrectanglesthatrandownthecentreoftheshuit.Thesmall
manwasbaldandhespokefluenthebrewwhichJcouldunderstandonlyindreams.MRWUREQUIRES
THEPRESENCEOFTHEDEALERPRINCE.ACONFERENCEISINACTIVATION.Wasallhesaid.justanhour
afterthatvision,hiscellphonebeganringingandmessengersfromthevariousmagickalhousesand
familiesstartedtheirordersforthereddust.Whentherequestsforthereddusthitfrommorethan
onehouse,Jknewsomethingwasup.thedoctorhadalsocalledup,requestinganaudience.didyou
hear?thedoctorasked.hearwhat?TherearealotofthingsIhear.themurderofanelder.what?!
Who?!themusicianDYS.ohmygodthatexplainsitIkeptlisteningtohisrecordshow?What
happened?IbelieveMRWUwillinformusattheconference.damnitDoc,howcomeIdidntfeelit
coming?noonedidJ,ifnotitwouldvebeenstopped.hisfamilymustbedistraughtapparently
hisgranddaughterfoundhisbodyheadlessbodyohlordsomethingbadisalreadyhappeningJ,
wemustbeprepared.Timetopulloutofyourshadowworld.timetogetbackintothegreatwork.

Jtookadeepbreathtocalmhimselfandstirredhiscoffee.Helethisminddriftwiththecrowds
passingby,sittingdownforlunch.Hewatchedthemlaughingandgossiping,showingeachotherpresents
theyhadboughtfortheirlovedones.Hewatchedthecouplesfeedeachothernoodlesandfriedwanton.
Helookedatalltheseheartlandersandwonderedifanyofthemhadaninklingofwhatwasgoingon
reallyunderthewiresoftheworldtheylivein.nonewshadbeenreleasedyetaboutthedeathofthe
musicianandwheniteventuallycameout,Jwonderedwhattheslantwouldbe,wonderedifthemedia
wouldtellthetruthorfabricateastory.DYSwasagreatmusician,reveredbymillionsoffansaround
theworld.hesangabouthope,love,lossandsalvationandnowhewasdead.Killed.Jshiveredatthe
thought.Somethingtoldhimthatthiswasjustthebeginning.
SomethingwasstirringagainindireNovemberandaregroupingwassoonathand.
216

thattimeoftheyearagaineh?camethedoctorsvoice.Jwassmokingacigarettewhatsupdoc?J
chuckled.
Healwaystriedtorelievethetensionsbyjoking.Somepeopleinthecirclesconsidershimthejester.The
doctorisaneldermanwhodressedlikeadandy.Hewalkedsevenfeettallinthecitywithawhitetail
coattuxedoandmatchingfedoraandcane.Hishairwasimmaculatelykept,whiteandlong.Hisface
agedandchiseledlikefinewine.thestormsaregettingworsebytheyearseh?hesaid.whichstorm
youtalkingboutdoc?Jsuckedonhiscigarette.allofthem.Jshookhisheadasthedoctorcameto
standnexttohim,removinganexpensivecigarfromhisinnercoatpocket.Hesnippedofftheendwith
agoldcutterandlititup.whoelsewillbeattheconference?Deluciacoming?Jasked.notherin
personbutheralter-form.ooh,Jaqi,theactress.yes.sheshot.shespowerful.yeahanyone
elseImightknow?acop.Jseyeswidened.dontworry,hesobviouslyonourside,mayhaveheard
ofhim.ElijahMonroe,.MadMonroe?Thepsychicandhorriblydisturbeddetective?thatstheone.
howcomehesinvolvedintheconference?rumorhasitthatseveraloccultkillingshaveoccurred.
DYSwasjustoneofthem.itsbadhuh?quiteso.ifonlySaulwasaroundIgotafeelingthis
meetingisalsoabouthim.IthinkheslonggonedocIdonotthinkso.yeah?Whysthat?
someoneaspowerfulashimdoesntjustupandleave.butthatshisnature.Hehasdoneit
manytimesbefore.butIthinktheeventsattheendofthiscyclewouldrequirehimtoreturn.I
dontknowifhewill.hehasto.youstillcounting?heaskedJ.hegavehimselfasmalllaugh,asmall
sigh.intwelvedaysitwouldbetwoyearsexactly.
andallthebesttricksintheartscantevensaywhereheis.
apparently,Jsaid,theresbeenreportsofcertaindreamings.Cominginfromasia.TheEuropean
islands.TheAmericas.Eventheantartics.Somefigure,nevertohavesurfacedbeforeinanykindof
tditionormythhasbeenappearingintheastrallands.Someschoolsofthoughtthinksitmightbehim.
Tryingtomakecontactinonewayoranother.
thebloatedman.Theeldersaid.Ihaveheardthestories.
youthinkitstrue?
hardtosay.Wellseewhatcomeoutofthisconference.
theybothsatthereinthesilenceforawhile.ThedoorofWUopeningacrossthestreetcaughttheir
attentionimmediately,asifthemotionhadanunseenforcecapturingtheirattention.Awomanina
greendragonprintcheongsamsteppedout.Shewastoothin,toootherworldlyofrthisplace,butthis
placehaditsotherworldlysecrets.Shelookedacrossthestreetandnoddedherhead.Theygotupand
crossedintherain.MisterWUisexpectingyoutwo.Shesaid.followme.shedisappearedintothe
houseofWUandtheyfollowedherin.

217

thefanontheceilingswirledinanopiatemanner.Languorousanddreamlike.Thefirsthallwasthe
opiumdenofWU.Onbothsidesofthehallwerestrawmattresses.Onit,skinandbonemenofgreat
agelaydownwiththeirlegscrossedoneachotherandsmokedopiumthroughelaboratepipesand
tubes.SomeweresmokingthereddustandJrecognizeditsscent.Theairwasthickwiththeburning
flowers.Theenergieswerelowandstealth,slowbutdeepandancient.Thereweremorecustomers
thanusual.Severalcourtesansfromthenextroomwereinthisone,helpingtheelderlymenwiththeir
recreation.Jstudiedthemwithinterest,fortheywereskimpilycladinonlytheirunderwear.These
womenhadpower.Theycouldjustlookatamanandmakehimfeelthingshethoughtlongdead.The
smokeintheroomwasgreyandhunglikeanominousfog.Jandthedoctorwasalreadygetting
lightheadedwhenthewomaninthecheongsamusheredthemthroughredcurtains,intoanotherhall.

Thehallofcourtesanswasadifferentanimal.Itwasbarelyliteventhoughlargeredlanternshungfrom
theceiling.Thewholehallwaspaintedblackandthelittleredlightgavethebedsinthecornersaneerie
andintenseglow.Somebedshadcurtainsdrawnaroundit.Softmoaningandgaspingcamefromthem.
Otherbedshadhalfnakedwomensprawled,waitingforthegueststoarrive.Someofthebedswere
empty.Theenergiesheresankintothegut.Itwasaplaceofritualsexandlustfulmagic.Aplaceof
desiresfulfilledandemotionsunbounded.Itwasaplaceofsexandsalvation.Temptationandtantra.
Thecourtesanshoweverneveraskedforthehandofthetwomen,asiftheyknewthattheywerehere
forotherthings.Thewomanledthemintoathirdplace.Here,behindtheblackcurtains,thepath
forkedintothreedifferentcorridors.Thewomanpausedattheentryways.Upaheadthroughthe
centrecorridor,anoldwomanwassittingwithherleftleguponthechairshewasin.Shewasslowly
fanningherselfwitharattanfan.Herdressingwasreminiscentofoldchina.Shecalledouttothe
womanandherguests.thereisburningoildownthisway,forablackmagicianpayshisprice.His
screamingdeathmayhauntyoulong.Choosewiselyifthisbethepathyoufollow.wedonotpass.
Thewomansaid.downthecorridortotheleft,thesoundofdogsfightingerupted.Abigwhitedogcame
outfromthedarknessofthecorridorsanditseyesalonegavethewarningnottopass.Butthewoman
said,expectedarethevisitors.Oneofthehouseofimmacula,theotheroftheDrashadfactory.Allow
thempassagesafely,guardingthing.Thedogsredeyesglowedlessthenitturnedandtrottedbackinto
thedarkness.Thewomanturnedtousandpointedtheway,afterthedog.MrWUisexpectingyou
both.Shesteppedasideforthemtopass.Jtookadeepbreathandtheyproceeded.

ThewaytotheofficeofWUisawayofrenewal.Towalkdownthispathistorenewthevowstaken.
Eachpersonhadahumanhistoryandamythicalhistory.Formostpeople,thehistoriesdonotcrossbut
foraselectfew,chosenbypowersgreaterthanthemselves,thehistorieswouldentangle,forminga
futurewhollydifferentfromthatofconvention.Thisisthepathofthemythical,Thepaththemagician
takes.MRWuoverseesthosewhowalkit.Heisbothjudgeandexecutionerofthosewhotransgress.
Heisauthorityandcommandantoftheselectedarcsandhauses.Thisnight,thehauseofJandthe
hauseofimmaculaisathand.Tobeworthyofthehause,thepathtoWuistakennotasatestbutan
218

affirmationofthatwhichhathcometopass.Astheybothwalkintothedarkness,theirhistoriesunfurl
again,likecinematicrecollection,arevisionoftheiroriginsandduties.

ThehauseofJ.

Asthedarknessengulfs,hismemoryisreignited.Jisinalifelongbeforethis.Inthatlife,heisahunter.
Atribalwarriorfromalandoccasionallymentionedinobscuredmyths.Inthosemyths,hemadethe
waythroughthegates.Gatesthatledoneworldtothenext.Inthatlife,Jkills.Hekillsthegatekeepers
withanoccultweaponofhisowndevising.Aspear,fabledtobethepre-formofthesamespearthat
killedChrist.ThespearthatwentontobecomeanoccultmysterytoHitlerandthesuccessorsafterhim.
Thespearwasfashionedwiththeboneofamythiccreaturecalledthegriffin.Aguarderofgateways.
ThefirstmythicalcreaturethewarriorJhadkilledbysheerwillpoweranddarkmagic.Hehadbecomea
greatermonsterthatnight,whenthehordesoftheKARAinvadedtheworldofITA.Recordedasthe
invasionofITAmillionsofbeingsweremassacredbytheinvadingarmyofdarkwarriors.Terbanacles
thatroseastowersfellbythehandofKARA.Greatsourcesofpowerwerestolenandmalignedbythe
powerhungryKARA.Jsfirstkillonlyfedhisdesireformore.ThearmiesofKARAreveredhimforhis
necessarypower.Withtheoccultweapon,heledthekingdomofKARAintomoredominions,taking
overthealternatemultiverseoneburningkingdomatatime.Fortwofullcyclesoftime,thekingdom
KARAdominatedwithterroruntilnearingtheendofthethirdcycle,whereJhadencounteredthe
gatekeeperthatputanendtothebrutalinvasions.Thespacetobeinvadedwasaspaceofmemories.A
cemeterygroundwheresacredqueensfromvariouslevelsofrealitywerelaidtorest.Thechiefsorcerer
ofKARAdeemeditaworthyandnecessaryinvasion,fortoowntherestingsoulsofsuchqueenswasto
havedominionoverthekingstheyinfluenced.ThearroganceofthechiefwarriorJwashisdownfall.He
sawtheold,bentmaninthecloakcoveredwithstrangesymbolsasanothervulnerablegatekeeper.
Evenweakerthanthemonstersthatguardedthegatestootherdominions.Heisjustanoldmanwas
hisfataljudgementfortheKeeperwasnotsimplythat.ItwasrecordedinThedownfallofKARAthatJs
deathwaslikeasupernovathatdidntendhimbutallowedhimtranscendemce.Itwasadeaththat
giftedJwithimmortalitybyahandthatsawhispotentialityandnothisthreat.Itwasajudgementand
executionbyahandthatsoughttotransformJintoanallyinsteadofdestroyinghimasanenemy.Itwas
ahandthatgavehimsalvationinsteadofdamnation.Manyliveslater,thesamehandwouldbecomea
handthatguidedJanditwasonlyinhiscurrentlifecyclewouldhelearnofthenamethatsavedhimso
manylivesbefore.SaulLiera.

JsjourneytotheofficeofWUremindedhimofhisimmortalfunction.Thatalthoughhislifenowasa
drugdealerandhislifethenasakillerofgatekeeperswasfarapartinsimilarity,hisbasicfunction
remained.Astheonewholeadstheothersfromonedimensiontothenext.Bytheendofthisjourney
219

downthepathtoWU,Jreaffirmedhisduty.Hewouldhelpbringaboutthenextstageoftranscendence,
bycrossingoverandbringinghiseternalallyback.Tobringsaulbackwouldbehisduty.Toleadthe
circletothenextlevelofexistencewouldbehisdestiny.

Thehauseofimmaculus.

Hallucinationtakeshiminthetunnel.Hewasjustamanbeforehebecamethedoctor.Helivedinthe
concreteworldbeforehehadbecomeanimmaculus.Hislifethenwasinsignificantandalienated.His
lifethenwaserasedbytheinsects.Memoryplaysalongthetimelineofhisimmortality.Herevisitsa
uncertainrangeofdarknessandwasteland.Inthemiddleofnowhere,hiscarhasbrokendown.Jiswith
himasheiswithhimnowthroughthecorrdioors.Itseemsthattheirlivesareintertwined.Smokeis
pouringoutoftheopenbonnetwheretheenginefries.Immanuelallowsittocoolandischeckinghis
laptopforupdatesfromthesatellite.Jissmokingajointbythedirtpaththeyreon,lostinthoughts.
Imagesofasemi-completecomplexisdownloadingintothelaptop.Likeadream,theimagesonthe
screenchanges.Imaesofhisfamily.Whokilledthemselvesintheirroomsintheircountrysidehouse,
notbecauseofmadnessbutbecausetheycouldntdealwithbeingchosenforconsciousness
metamophia.Bythewritofthescribesofouthers,itwasmentionedthattheimmaculusfamilyhad
beenmarkedbyentitiesthatappearedaslocustsandprayingmantisaroundthehouse.Thenumberof
theseinsectsintensifiedoverthemonthsduringtheperiodofrebmecedsdoomandbythefinalltwilight
ofthefamilysline,theinsectshadallscatteredleaving,Byguilt,Immanueltheonlyoneleft.Their
deathsarehisburdens.Hemustnotallowotherstodieinvainandfearoftheunknown.Itishisdutyto
bringnewconsciousnesstolighttothosehwocannotunderstandit.Theinsectshadchosenhisfamily.
Theinsectshavechosenhim.Inthewakeofhisfamilyssuicide,hehasbenedriventobuildthehausof
imamcuilusrighthereintheplaceofsoilandsand.Jagged,fragmentarymemoryandemotions.Funerals
hewastoodistraughttoattent.Absentfromthewakeofhisfamily.Dischargedfromreality.Hehose
thehilloftheinsectsforretreat.Theself-exhilehadbeeninstilleduponhimbyagrieftoogreatforhis
oqnhumanity.Fragments.Brokenrecollections.Itwasthesurgicalroomoftheinsectsheremembers
most.Thetheatreofgreeninsectoidprocesses.Hehadenteredaballroomwherealltheguestwerein
formaldinnerwear,.Tuxedosandexpensivedressesanddiamondsandbowties.Theyallhadtheheads
ofprayingmantises.Theytookhimlikeaguest.Theyleanedoverhimashestaredattheskiesabove.
Justbeforeyoudietheysaid,youwillseebillionsofstars.Histransformationoflifewasnotanalchemy
ofeventsbutaninvasionfromanoutsideforce.Theinsectoidhumanstookhimthroughalargemetal
elevator.Itopenedonafloorwhere,behindbluetranslucentcurtains,otherhumanswerebeingfed
uponbywhatseemedlijevampires.Bloodsplashedagainstthescreensthatsurroundedaroom.The
surgerieswereperformedinthesacrificialroom.Theinsectsatethroughhimandbirthedinhim
blindnessandcharmandimmortality.Fragementary.Shatteredjigsawpieces.Inthedark,byaghost
pathwayoftime,heheldthehandofagoddessandledherthroughtheroadwaywhereserpentslayon
thesides,daringnottocrossthepathofthetwo.Heknewnothernameeventhoughheledherto
220

safety.Thestrangenessofhislifeafterhisfamilysdeathbesethim.Theinsectsthoughthimaboutthe
waysofrootconsciousnessandthevariantformsittook.Theinsectsspoketohimandhewaslearned.

PhonejournalentryofMARALEORO.

Itisalreadynight.IhadbeenawakeforthirteenhoursandIstillcannotshakethefeelingsfromthe
nightmaredream.Icouldnotleavethemotel.Iturneddowntheblindsalldayandstayedinthe
darkness.Apartofisalreadyafraidofthiscityandthedreamsitinspires.Apartofmeunderstandsthati
amnolongerthesamepersonthathadpassedoutthenightbefore.Ivaguelyrecalledthedrinkskeeper
thathadbroughtmebackandleft.ItisthedreamthatIremembermostvividly.IcannotforgetNicole.
Thatyounginnocentgirlwhohadledmethenwastakenawayfrommethenreturned,onlytokill
herself.Apartofmebelievesthatsheisme.thethingIammostafraidofisthethingthathad
happenedtoher.takenbythosemen.Slowly,Iambeginningtofeelthatsomethinglikethathad
happenedtome,butnotphysically,butpsychically.IvespenthourstryingtofigureitoutbutIamno
whereclose.Inhalfaday,Jaqiwouldfinallyarrive.Maybeonlyshecanhelpme.somethinginmeknows
thistobetrue.Jaqifeelslikemyonlylinkleft.Ivebeenfeelingtiredalldayandcouldnotmovemuch.It
feelslikethedreamhadmadearuptureinmypsycheandallsortsofmemoriesandrevelationsare
risingfromtheabysswithinme.allthosefastandhighyearsofbeingintheband,ofbeinginthemusic,
seemedtohavecongealedintoaballoftwistedenergythatwasreleasingitself,,buibtbybitfrommy
subconscious.Itried,manytimesnottothinkofhowIfoundmydeadlover.Todistractmyself,I
thoughtaboutthemythIwassearchingforinthiscityanditfeelslikethemythhadbeguntofindme,
ythroughthedream.HowitisallconnectedIcannotsayforsure.Buttheyearofwritingomandaeis
alreadyontheway.Ivealreadybegunwritingitinmyhead.Thebookhastakenonthestatusofthe
greatwork.IhavestartedtobelievethatImustgivemyselfuptothegreatwork,because,eventhough
itshallstealawaysleepandsanity,itislifethatitultimatelyoffers.Astrangefaithisbuildingupinside
me.eventhoughthedisturbingsequencesofthenightmareremainsamystery,Ibelievethatthe
processofwritingomandaewouldbringeverythingtogetherintothelight,orvisibledarknessasmy
mindhasbeguncallingsuchrevelations.Whatistosurfacefrommylifethatwillfusewiththelifeofthis
mythInowdonotknow,butthestrangefaithassuresme,thatbytheendofthisendeavour,Iwillbe
enlightened.
221

IcanfeelthisplacechangingbutIsense,evenstronger,thatitistheplacethatischangingme.itistrue
thatafamedshamanwasbroughtbacktothisearthbyentitiesthatresidedintheroomnexttomine.It
istruethathereturnedbuthadbeentakenawayagaintwoyearsago,rightaboutthissametimenow.
HeiscentraltothemythIamsearchingfor.Heiscentraltothebookofomandae.Isitmylifesjourney
thatleadsmetothisplace?Isitmylifesjourneythatcompelsmetoauthorthiscomplextext?Myheart
andsoulappearstoknowtheanswerbbutmyminddoesnot..theinddoubts,asmuchasthelogical
humanminddoubtsmagic.IhadbeenwarnedbyJaqi,inoneofourcorrespondences,nottoallowthe
logicalmindtointerferewiththework.Itisthesameascreatingmusic.Youallowtheimpulseof
creativitytotakeoverandsuchimpyulsesarenotbasedintheorderofthingsbutbythechaosandits
irrationalheart.Thoughtheysaythereisorderinchaos,theorder,Ibelieve,mayonlybegrasped
throughperiodsofretrospectionafterthemadnesshaspath.SoIbelievethatImustoffermyselfupto
themadness,toallowittotakemebythehandandtoleadmetoplacesoftheapocalypse.Itisonly
thenwhenIcantrulymakemanifestthesecretshiddeninthebloodofthemyth.Ihavenoteatenthe
entireday.Itisasifthedreamhadimpregnatedmeandthethinggrowinginmyguthaserasedallneed
forfood.Mysourceofenergyisshifting,myalternativemindtriestotellme.evolutionisthrobbingin
myveins.Fortheentiredurationofthesun,Ihadspentmyenergiesthinkinginthecomfortofsilence.I
cannottellifInolongerneedthemusicbutitisunlikely.MusictakesmetootherplacesbutIbelieve
thatsilencetakesyoutoplacesmusiccannot.Musicisterrestrial,atoolsuitedforterrestrialsenses.
Fromsilence,ifsilencebethelanguageofgod,anewcreativeordermaybereached.Suchismyhope.
Suchismydream.Foritisthedutyofanartisttobringtolightanexistenceneverbeforeexperienced
byhumankind,sothatitcanglimpsethepotentialofahigherrealmofconsciousness,amarker,a
destinationthatwoulddriveusforwardalongthetrajectoryofevolution.Itisinmansnaturetoevolve
andmanisnomoreitisthatbeingsnaturetoevolveintosomethinghigherandgreaterthanwhatithas
become.

222

DEATHOFTHEFAMILYPART1

Whenthevideoequipmentwassetupandfourclownmaskswerelaidoutonthebed,theobesesadist
wenttothehall.
so,whoshouldwefuckfirst?heaskedthehusband.Thehusbandwasnakedandboundwithbarbed
wire.Hismouthgluedshut,hiseyesgluedopen.Beforehim,terrifiedandtightlyboundandgagged
werehis35yearolddancerwifeand16yearolddaughter.Therewerethreeothermenintheroom.
223

Theywereallfatandgrotesqueanddarkskinned.Somehadboilsontheirfacesandarms.Theywere
holdingontohiswifeanddaughter.Theywerebothcryingnoisilyintotheirgags.comeonchoose!Or
weshalltossacoin.Thehusbandremainedstronganddidnotshedatear.Hestaredathischildand
lover.Hiswifehadonasmallpinksundress.Hisdaughterinashortdenimskirtandawhitet-shirt.
alrightthen.Theobesemansaid.hedughispockets.Hebroughtoutacoinandshowedittothewife.
youreheads.Heturnedthecoinaroundandshowedtheotehrsidetothegirl.youretails.he
turnedtothehusband,whowasinakneelingpositionwiththethirdmanholdinghimfrombehind.The
fatmanmotionedtothegroundandthemanbehindthefathershovedhimfacedown.Thefatman
tossedthecoin.Itlandedinfrontofthefather.nowlookupslowlytotheoneweregoingtofuck
first.Hesaidslowly.Thefatherstartedtosob.Tearsfillinguphisgluedopeneyes.Thefatman
stompedonhisheadonceanddroveitintothecarpet.ISAIDLOOKUPTHEONEWEREGOINGTO
RAPEFIRST!withoutanychoice,heslowlylookedup.Hisdaughtermethissorryeyes.Thegirl
screamedintohergagandtrashedinthearmsofhercaptorwhowasnowexcited.Hekeptsniffingthe
girlshair.Thewifestartedamuffledwailing.Themandraggedherintothechildsroomwhiletheother
carriedthetrashingsixteenyearoldgirlintothemasterbedroom.come!thefatmansaid,youwill
watchusasweslowlypeelyourdaughtersclothesoffhelaughedlikeamaniacasthehusbandwas
draggedtohisfeetandshovedintotheroomfollowingthemanwithhisdaughter.

ERCONDUSANDTHEPUBDELABLUES

bydisturbanceandfirefall,theworldsoutsidethepubdelabluesaltered.Agreatermiseryfillsthenow
shrunkenroom.Thebarwascrammedagainstthewall,againsttheglassshelvesofliquoralmost
finished.Thewineofthegodshadbeenconsumedalmostintotality.Theflowersofercondusisallgone,
nomoredistortionsoftime.Therewasonlythreetallroundtablesleft,setsidebysidetouching.The
stonesonthewallareindisarray.Presentandpastcollidedlikecrashingtrainsinslowmotion.The
barkeeperisoverweightwiththeburdenofhischarge.Abreakdownforhimisimminent.Ercondushas
slippedintoameditativestate.Adesperatediatribeagainsttherapidlychangingmultiverse.20
twilightshadpassedsincethepromiseofwindowsanddoorsbutnonehadappeared.Hishairhas
grownlongandunrily,hisnailsextendedlikeawildanimal.Hiseyes,tryingtohidebehindclosedlids
havebecomelikeawilderthingbutchaoshassurpasseditsownpeakandnowadifferentorderwasat
hand.Inmeditationhehadseentheguitarmanandhistroupe.Thecountsandtheircompanionsnow
toofarforercondustoconnectwith.Theblackgrandpianointhecornerwashalfcrushedagainstthe
closingwalls.Thebarkeepwascurledupuponit,feverdreamseatinghisroyalsoul.Hewasmumbling
vaguely,articulatingwithaperiodsance.

Ireturntothedollwithplasticeyes
224

Big,blue,hypnotized
Staringaheadinadeadblankness
DressedandsuitedforSundayschool
Herchromeheartbeats,likeawoodendoorunopened
SunlightrisingStealsawaythenight
Tigersroamintheveinswithchemicals
voices(in)phamaceuticainvocate
wastedandcompleteinthecosmicscheme
Icollapseintodeathbed,thenriseagain
drivenagainstthehours,battlingdaybreak
sunkendeepintoabysmalhouses
findingpassageinclutteredpsyches
givinglifetolosthorizons
fatherRAseesthroughthecrying
hottearsstreamingfrombleedingmemory
shapingthenameofloversdistraught,
enlightened,prayedfor,ascendedpasttime.

Themagicofercondusisimpotentagainsttheloomingweatherofdoom.Hedeeplyfearsnot
recognizingtheworldwhendepartureisnigh.inmeditation,heextendshispsycheuntotheeastern
wall.Thestones,havingshiftedagain,marksthedecliningofthesigils,anexpressionofaworlderasing
thememoryofitsownsaviorandthemapofanelaborateendisformedinthewakeoftimerunning
out.

Bloodisthelastvistaofritualthemurmuringbarkeeperspokeindreamsofhallucinations.

Thefinalattemptfortranscendingthisplaceofburdensrestsintheopeningofwounds.
225

SomethingbeyondwasreachingErcondusthroughthefeveredkeeper.Inthemeditativestate,
Ercondusconverseswiththespiritchannelingthroughthekeeper,searchingforanexit,ananswerfrom
beneaththeblackwaves.

thepainofglassonskindivertsthepainofabortivereality.

Ercondusshiversatthisthought.Hisspinesetmildlyaflamebythesuggestionsofbrutality.Teethering
ontheedgeofunderstanding,heaskstheunforgivingspirit.benotmineownbloodtheonlydoorway?

Andthespiritsays,archwaybethebloodonthewalls.

Thebonesinthebodyofercondushurtbuthismuscleswererelaxed.Slowlyhereturnedto
consciousness,aconsciousnessnotyettouchedbythehowlingoutsidethewallsofthepubdelablues.
Heopenedhiseyes.Theceilinghaddescendedalarmingly.Thebarkeeperwasshivering.Shadows,like
thingslfyingoverhead,movedaroundthesmallerplace.Thehallwasnowtransformingintoaroom.
Thepicturesonthewall,ofthemartyrsandsuicideartsistwerelopsided.Some,fromanolder
generationhadalreadyfallenoffandshatteredonthefloor.Therewasthen,theonepictureframe.
ThepaintingofawomanErcondushadnotseenbefore.Inakindoffugestate,herecalledherstatue
erectinacourtyardlongabandonedbytheroyals.Likeamemoryreturningbutnotofhisownmind,he
sawtheburningfigureofacourtjester,embracingthisstatueasheburned.Therewasapainterinthe
periphery,heightened,inspired,paintingthesceneofthemagicianonfire.Erconduscarfeyllyremoved
theancientfutureportraitofthisnamelessqueenthenchosethebiggestofthebrokenglassfromthe
frame.Thebrokenedgegleaming,Ercondusstrippedoffhiscoat,baringhisarmsandstoodbeforethe
wallofchangingstones.

THEFIELDOFMYSTERIS

WhenFieldXreturnedtothemotherhouseofmysteries,theyhadlearntthatseveralofthefirst
respondershadenteredthedeathstate.Theblasphemiedbuildinghadgrownfarmoreterribleinthe
timetheywereaway.Moredeathshipshadarrivedandthemadnessofthezeitgeisthadspreadfarther
226

intothefield.Shoressetintheislandssurroundingthefieldhadinversed,takenbythesealikeatlantis.
Thememoriesoftheotherhouseshadbeguneroding.Spirits,longagolaidtorestwerereturningwitha
deeperdisturbance.
Theoracleofordomhasspokenolderbrother.Itisonlysaulwhocanhelpus.
saul?Locusqueried,thelostsorcerer?
yes.Heholdthekey.Hismagicisalsoofthesameoriginasthemagicthatblasphemiestheroomwith
thedeadprisonerandpriest.Itisinmyopinionthatwhateverhastranspiredherehasitsrepercussions
intheworldofsoilandsand.
Locusthefirstwasconcerned.thenthebarriershasalreadybeenbroken.Thiscrisisisfartherreaching
thatIdivineditso.
whatshallwedobrother?
Locusthefirstcontemplatedthenextmoves.Thendecided.ImustseekthehouseofWu.Heconvenes
withthefringemagiciansofthistimeintheplaceofsoilandsand.Ifearwemustcrossmoreboundaries
thanIdeemitappropriate.Hepausedagainthikning.leaveus..hetoldfield-x.heretiredtohis
chambersthatislitbyafurnace.Aholocaust,scryingfire.

Thenakedwidowcrawledoutfromthedarkcorner.Achainfastenedtoherlegs.Herlipsarecracked
andblleding.Hereyesswollenfromcrying.Shespeakslikeabatteredchild.thepanicofthecitywill
come,locustheoneThentheywillknowofus.Oftheothercirclesthatweavethroughtheirtimeand
place.

someofthemalreadyknowofushetellsherThetimesarerunningout.Shesays.Hegoesupto
thecrawlingwomanandtoucheshersofthair.Heunsheathesadaggerfromhisrobe,cutsoffpartof
herhairthenfeedsittothefurnaceinhischambers.Thefiregrows.Soonhewillseeintoitandseethe
fatesunfurling.Itsgottencolderintheroom.Shemoveshisrobeaside,kissesthegemringsonhisfeet
andtellshim,itwillnothurtasmuch.

Thehouseofwu

TherewereotherswaitingintheofficeofWUandJcouldnotrecognizemostofthem.Thedoctorknew
someofthefacesbutnotothers.HeledJaroundandintroducedhimtothoseheknew.Elijah,hesaid,
227

meetJ.ahyes.MadMonroeextendedhisshakinghand,thedrugbaron.Jwasuneasy.Monroe
lookedlikeahundredyearsoldandextremelydisturbed.Hisfacehadthelookofyearswithoutsleep
andyearsofchemicalabuse.Therewasawildnesssunduedbehindtiredwastedeyes.Hishairandsuit
wasgreyandunkempt,thewaydetectiveslookwhentheyvebeenworkingtoolongonunsolvedcases.
Hisbreathstankofalcoholandcigarettes.Jhadheardstoriesofthedetective.Itseemshekeptfor
himselfapetghostofsomekind.Agirl-childinapvcsuitandfullheadharness.Asickchild
pornographersfetish.Itwastheghostchildthataidedthedetectiveinsolvinghomicide.mysteries
relatedtotheoccult.HeheardthatMonroehimselfiscursedandthathewasperpetuallydyingfrom
internalbleeding.Asufficientamountofalcoholhadtobekeptchurninginhissystemorthebleeding
wouldgetoutofhandandhewoulddieanebolaviruslikedeath.Thedoctoraskedhimifheknew
anythingaboutthemurderoftheelder.bepatientdoctorGrant,Iwilladdresstheconferencewhen
thetimecomes.Theyleftitatthat.AshortfatmanwithacigarcameuptoJandthedoctor,hey
Immanuel!Longtimenosee!theyhuggedasJwatchedoninamusement.J,meetWeedDjango.
greetingsgoodfella.
MrDjangoisaneditorandpublisher,ImmanuelGrantexplained,youheardoftheoutherbooks?
vaguely,poetsfromanotherdimensionbeingchanneledbyderangedpoetsofourtimetheyre
knownasproets.Weedcorrectedhim,prosewriterandpoetseh?Proets.Orouthersiftheydolong
formworks.Anthologeistsiftheypainstakinglycompilelexicons.Thedoctorasked,howcomeyoure
here?Imnottoosuremyself.ThereIwaslyingdowninmybombedoutbuildingwhenthisshort
ChinesemanarrivesandsaysMRWUwantstoseeme.obviouslyIshatmyself.WhatdidIdo?Iskedthe
smallman.itiswhatyoucandoforushereplied,thewayallthesemysterioustypestalk.Bah!So
hereIam,acoginthemachine.Ithoughtmylifewasoveryouknow?Aftertheredeventtwoyears
back,whenalltheouthersandproetsweregone,vanished,kaput.Ithoughttherewasnomorebooks
tomanagebutapparently,somethinghadhappenedrecentlyandtherestalkabouttwobooksgetting
lostorsomethingImnottoosure.Iguesswellfindoutsoonenoughyes?jsaid.awomansvoice
interruptedtheirconversationswiththeouthereditor,DoctorImmanuelGrant,DoctorJ.tjheylooked
uptoJaqiDanielle.Thealter-formofDelucia.heyJsaid,hisheartskippingabeat.Theactresswas
beautiful.AmoderndayAudreyhapburn.beenawhileJ,shesaid,youstillwastedonlocotraine?
nonomydear,hekissedheroutstretchedglovedhand,Ionlydothereddustandcigarettesnow.
thosethingswillkillyou.shejoked.andhowareyouDoctorGrant?verywellladyD,verywell.
cantsaythatforpoorDYShuh?yeah.Apity
Ihopewegetsomeanswers.Ithinkwereheretohelpfindthoseanswers.Anothervoicesaid.
ImmanuelrecognizedThecountofcirqubutwasnotexpectinghimatthisconference.goodcount.
Immanuelbowed.Jfollowedalthoughhedidnotknowhim.Itakeityouarethedealerofthedust.He
saidtoJ.Iamhe.good.Mybrothersbelieveyouritemswillbeofusetousinourworld.todealwith
whateveritisthatishappening.whichhousetoyoubelong?Immanuelasked.thehouseofihiir.
ThenametriggeredoffJsmemory.Saul,whenhewasstillpresent,hadspokenaboutthehouseofihiir.
Itexistedduringthetimeofthesatellite.ThetimeofAi-Fithatendedwiththeredevent.Thehouseof
ihiirisofelectricsurrealism.Ofstrangepsychedelicentitiesandevents.Itwasadrivingenginefornew
creation.Ofneongodsandhallucinatorygoddesses.Howallthishadaparttoplayinthisconference,
228

hedidnotknow.Therewasasenseofurgencyintheroom.Anurgencybroughtonbythestorms.There
wasanelderwomantheretooandhefeltthatheknewherbutcouldnotplaceit.Withherwasa
blindmanandamanwhowas7feettall.Thethirdmanwhostoodbehindthemhadseveralbirdsof
variousclassespercheduponhisshoulders.Acatholicpriestwasalsopresentandhecarriedwithhima
blueumbrella.ThehousesrepresentedinthehouseofWUhadinonewayoranotheraconnectionwith
theeventsthathadbeentranspiring.ThecycleofdireNovemberhathalreadyarrived.Thingshavebeen
setintomotion.
theenergiesintheroomstirredstrongly.Theconversationsbetweenthecircleshusheddownalmost
immediately.MRWUwasintheroom.

Jlitanothercigarette.herewegohewhisperedunderhisbreath.Therewasadreadthathungabove
himandheknewthedreadwasofhisownmaking.Thedoctorseemedcalm,butasmallanxietycaused
himtotaphiscaneincessantlyonthefloor.Theywaitedbeforealargeblackmarbletablethatappeared
chiseledoutofamountainousblockmadehollowtoformtheroomtheywerein.twolargegargoylesof
anunknownmythicalcreaturesatoneithersideofthetable;theirwingsfoldedback,theirgrotesque
headslikedeformedlionswereturnedbackwardsfromtheirbody.Thelimbs,likethatofanapehad
clawsandringsonthem.Theringstheyborehadstonesandgemsofanunknownorigin.Theroom
smeltofsexandopiumanddeathandpower.The900yearoldjudgesatstatelybehindthealtarlike
table.Hedidnotwastetimewithpleasantries.

AGRAVETIMEHASCOME.Hebegan,hisvoiceresonatedwithancientpower,ITISUNDERSTOOD
THATTHEREDEVENTHADDIVERTEDTHEMALICEOFTHEREDIDOLTWOCYCLESAGO.BUTTHAT
DIVERSIONDIDNOTCOMEWITHOUTAPRICE.ITISUNDERSTOODTHATSAULLIERADUFONTAINWAS
THESORCERORRESPONSIBLEFORTHEDIVERSIONANDTHATEARTH,THEPLACEOFSOILANDSAND
HADBEENSAVEDBYHISHAND.BUTHISACTIONSHADOTHERCONSEQUENCESFORTHEMAGICHEHAD
USEDWASAMAGICNOTMEANTFORTHATTIME.THEACTPERFORMEDHADCAUSEDARUPTUREIN
THEMULTIVERSEANDTHEMULTIVERSESTHATMIRRORSIT.THESEEDWASSOWNWHENTHEBLACK
HADDEVOUREDTHEREDANDNOWTHETIMEHATHCOMEWHENTHATSEEDHASREACHEDFULL
TERM.Hepaused,lettingitsinkin.THEREISANEMERGENCEOFATRANSITIONALWORLD.AWORLD
THATBRIDGESTHETIMEBEFORETHEREDEVENTANDTHETIMETHATISTOCOME.WEARENOWINITS
HEART.THEEYEOFTHISTRANSITIONALSTORM.THENAMEOFTHISPERIODISKNOWNAS1000.100.IT
ISAPROCESSOFCOSMICPSYCHOSIS.ITISACITYTHATLIVESANDBREATHSANDMOVESTHROUGH
MANYCONTINUUMS.ITISTHENIGHTTIMESOULOFEXISTENCE,THEDARKUNDERBELLYOFDIVINITY.
THESORCERORRESPONSIBLEFORTHESEEDINGOFTHISOCCURRENCEISTRAPPEDINITSOWNMAKING
BUTITISANOTHERWARLOCKTHATHASNURTUREDIT.THEPREGNANCYOFTHISEXISTENTIAL
MOSTROCITYHASCOMEFULLTERMANDTHEWARLOCKHASEXITEDTHISLYBRINTHWOMBOF
CORROSIONANDWITHITISBORNEATRIUNETERROR.ITBLASPHEMIESTHESACREDNESSOFTHE
229

THREE.THEREISTHEFATHER,THEBLACKHEARTOF1000.100.THEREISTHESON,KNOWNASTHE
GENERALANDTHEREISTHEUNHOLYZEITGEIST,ACONSCIOUSFORCEOFINTENTION,ITSINTENTIONIS
THATOFCRUELTYANDMURDERANDRAPEANDDEATH.ITISAFORCEAKINTOTHEPOWERSOF
MOTIVATION.ITSMOTIVEISCOSMICALLYCANCEROUS.ANILANDUNFORGIVINGPOWERHASBEEN
UNLEASHEDANDTHEWORLDSAREENCOUNTERINGITSMANIFESTATION.THEHAUNTINGOFTHIS
ENTITYHASALREADYBEGUNASOURSERVANTELIJAHMONROESHALLPRESENT.

Monroesteppeduptothetableandfacedthegatheredcircles.Hishandshakingmorethanusual.on
themorningofNovember11
th
,asevenyearoldCaucasianboywasabductedjustafterthetenoclock
Christianserviceat11a.m.youcannoticethenumericalblasphemies.Thedatebeing11:11thenumber
ofawareness.Thetimebeingelevenandtheageoftheboybeingseven,adivinenumber.Alreadywe
cantelltheintelligenceofthis...killer.Thechildhadgonemissing.Nowitnesses.Nocommotion.At
eleventhatnight,thechildsoparentswascalledonthephone,andaman;svoicehadinstructedthe
parentstoreturntothechurchandthattheywouldfindtheirboysafeintheSundayclasshall.At
elevenelevenp.mIwascalled,IbelievebythesamemanandIwastoldthatIhadanearlychristmas
gift.Helaughedashehungupthephone.TheparentscalledfatherMichael,whoispresentheretoday.
Thepriestwiththeblueumbrellanoddedsadly,andtoldhimtogolookforthechild.Whenthe
parentsrushedtothechurch,theyfoundthepriesthrowingupoutsidethecompound.Hedidnotwant
tolettheparentsintothehallbutthefathermanagedtostrugglefreeandrushedintotofindhisson.
Thechildsbodywasnailedtothelargecrucifixhangingattheendofthehall.Hisorganshadbeen
removedandplacedoneleventables.Kidneys,intestines,stomach,heart,gentials,eyes,ears,teeth..
Alllaidout,eachononetable.BythetimeIarrivedthewithotherofficers,theparentswerealready
hysterical.Themotherhadranoutintothetrafficscreaming.Shewasseverlyinjuredwhenacarran
straightintoher.theyreinthehospitalnow,severetrauma.Atthesceneofthekilling,threwasa
symbol.Fivecirclesandtwolines.WebelievethatitisThesymbolof1000.100.Copiesofthesymbol
waspassedaround.Iknowthis.Avoicefromthecirclesaid.itwasthecount.Ihaddreamtofthe
bloatedmanandthissymbolwasonhisforehead.butrightsideup.wewillcometothedreamingof
thebloatedmanafterMonroehasfinishedsopeakingMrWusaid.Monroelitacigaretteandtooka
longswigfromhisbottleofwhiskey.

OnthethirteenthofNovember,asecondmurderoccurred.Anindiannationalwhowasworkingina
constructioncompanyresponsibleforthebuildingoftheIONshoppingcomplexinthecitydidnotcome
toworkthatmorning.Heappearedfineandwelljusthenightbeforesonoonesuspectedhewassick.
Byeveningtime,anexcavationcrewhadtheirexcavationinterruptedbywhatappearedtobeablockof
concretebubrieddeepintheheartoftheentiresite.Itshouldnothavebeenthereforthegroundhad
notbeendugupbeforetheproject.Confused,theforemaninchargeofthezonerequestedtheblockto
thebrokenapartandremoved.Insidetheconcreteblock,theyfoundthemissingworker.Suchadeath
couldnothavehappened.Itwasiftheblockhadappearedthereinthegroundovernightandthe
securitydidnotfindanythingamissthroughouttheirwatch.Autopsyreportsthatthedeadmanwas
230

filledwithcement,apparentlyforceddownhisthroat.Hismouthwasopenandfilledwithhardened
cement.Inscribedonitagain,wasthesignof1000.100.hepausedandtookanotherlongswig.the
FBIwascalleditaftertheseconddeath.Thewholedepartmentwasalreadygearingupforapossible
occultserialkiller.Theyputmeinchargeoftheinvestigation.Iinvokedmyspiritaideandsentitout
withhopesoffindingthiskiller.Itreturned,terrifiedandunabletocommunicatetomeitsfindings.She
keptmutteringthewraithhungers,thewraithhungersIwasinthemidstoftryingtostabilizemy
hauntedghostchildwhenthethird,mostdisturbingcaseoccurred.Thistime,notforeignersbutalocal
Chinesefamilyofthree.Advdwascourieredtomewithareturnaddressofthefamily.Onthecoverof
thedvdboxwasthefamilyportrait.Apretty36yearoldwife.Herhandsomehusbandandasixteen
yearolddaughterwhoinheritedherparentsgoodlooks.Icalledanemergencymeetingtoviewthedisc
whilesendingoutotherdetectivesimmediatelytothehouse.weviewedthedisc.hestopped.Took
alongswigandlitanothercigarette.Theroomwasalreadyheavywithdreadanddisturbance.Ihave
towarnyouallofthegraphicdetail,justsoyouknowwhatkindofkillerweredealingwith.Istillhave
nosolidprofilebutitsdefinitelyoccult.Meticulous.Psychotic.Verydisturbed.Possiblypossessedbya
highdemon.Myghostchildstillcannotoffermemuchanswers.Trynottobetoosickpeople.Hetook
anotherswig.Hewasalreadyveryintoxicatedbutveryawareofthestoryhewasabouttotell.

thevideostartedoutwithashotofthehusband.Boundnakedinachairwithbarbedwire.Abigman
wasstandingbehindhimholdingahuntingknifetothehusbandsneck.Itappearedthatthehusbands
eyesweregluedopenandhismouthgluedshut.Helookedextremelyterrified.Thekillerwas
introducingtheman.Hisfullname.Brandonong.hisjob.Investmentbanker.ThekillerSaidthathehad
twolovelyladiesinhislife.HiswifeRachelandhisdaughterjudy.Inthebackgroundwecouldhear
muffledsobbing.Thecamerawasturneduntothem.Bothboundandgaggedandheldbytwomore
menwhowereobeseandwearingfrighteningclownmasks.Theyweresniffingthenecksofthewoman
andthegirl.Thekillerwentontosaythattheyweregoingtohavesomefunwiththemandthat
everythingwouldbefilmedanddistributedonthenet.Dvdswastobesenttothefamilysfamily.this
istheglorryof1000.100thekillersaidbeforethesceneended.Inthenextscene,theshotbeganwith
thehusbandagainbutthistimetheyhadmovedhimintothemasterbedroom.Thecamerapannedto
showthedaughterthrashingandscreamingintohergagonthebed.Theotherthreemenweretaking
offtheirclothesandnottheirmasks.Thesceneranforalmost45minutes.Beginningwiththemen
crawlingontothebedtowardsthegirl,retyingherlimbstotheendsofthebedandslowlyandplayfully
removingherclothes.Theyproceededtorapeheronebyone.Occasionallyitwillshowthefathers
reactionashedaughterwasdefiled.Thesamehappenedwithhiswife.Thescenecuttothegirls
bedroomanditshowedhiswifebeingrapedbyallfourmen.Aftertherapesceneofhiswife,thedisc
showedthemenconsumingcocaineofftheglassdinnertable.Theywereallchattingabouthow
pleasurabletheiractivitieswere.Thesecondpartofthefilmshowedthehusband,stillboundtothe
chairbutinthebathroom.Thetwomenwerestringentlytyingupthewifeinabathtub.Theyboundin
herinastricthogtie.Theysealedupthedrainageinthetub.Hotscaldingwaterwasturnedandthe
videoshowedtheboilingwaterslowlyfillthetubalongsidehermuffledscreaming.Theyletthe
husbandwatchashiswifeeventuallypassedoutfromthepainasthewaterfloodedthetubdrowning
231

her.andnowforthelittlegirlthekillersaid.Herdeathtookmuchlongertimeandthevideoshowed
everygogrythingtheydidtoher.thescenewasshotinthemasterbedroomwheretheyhadlefther
naked,spreadeagledandstillgagged.Thecamerapannedthebedsidetablefilledwithtools.Needles.
Pliers.Solderingiron.Tubesofsuperglue.candles.ahammer,syringersandvialslateridentifiedas
adrenaline.Thevideocontinuedtorunshowingwhattheydidtoher.whenIarrivedatthehouse,most
oftheofficerssenttherewerealreadysickandvomitingoutsidethegarden.Iwastheonlyonewho
wentinandstayedlongenoughtoseewhattheyhaddonetothefatherandduaghter.

Allofthegirlsnails,fromherhandsandfeetwerebrokenoffandsupergluedtothechestofherfather,
formingapictureofasmileyface.Herfingersandtoeswereallbrokenbrutally.Hervaginawassewn
shut.Hernippleswereslicedoffandgluedbelowherfathersnipples.Betweentheacts,whenevershe
stoppedscreamingintohergagandpassingout,theywokeherwithsmallshotsofadrenalineand
smellingsalts.Thentheycontinuedtheirdepravedact.Hereyesweresewnopenandwhitewaxfrom
thecandlewasdrippedontoherforcedopeneyesblindingherasitburnedthenhardened.Theskinon
herberastswereslicedoffneatlyandgluedontothefathersshavedhead..Symbolsof1000.100was
burnedontoherbodywiththesolderingiron.Cigarettemarkscoveredmostofherthighsandstomach
andneck.Tubesofgluewereemptiedintoherears.Herkneecapswereshattered.Thecoronernoted
thatherheartfinallygaveway,probablytowardstheendofhertorture.Thelastscenewasofthekiller
slowlycuttingoffthemansgenitals.Theylethimbleedtodeath.Callsstartedcominginanhourafter
weproceededtothehouse.Thevideoswerealreadyuploadedandtheterrifiedpublicwasalready
reacting.Thenewsroomscalledus,sayingthattheytoohadreceivedthedvds.ofcoursenothingwas
broadcastedandallthesitesidentifiedhavingthefilmhaditimmediatelyremoved.Ofcourse,copies
arestillcirculatingontheoutside.Wecantstopeverything.Hesuckedonhiscigarette.Then,thirty
hoursago,thebodyofDYSwasfoundbyhisgranddaughter.Hestopped.Hecouldnolongergoon.

Mrwucontinued,thatmakesitsixoccultmurdersinunderaweek.Eight,notcountingthemurdersin
thefield.
thefield?Immanuelgrantasked,puzzled.theyhavenothingtodowiththisreality.
anemissaryfromthedimensioncalledTheFieldhadcomeforanaudiencewithme.hehasclaimed
thataprisonerandapriestinhisdimensionhasbeenkilledbysomekindofforceandthatforceis
incubating,growingintheroomwherethetwodeadare.Thisemissarybelievesthatanevengreater
yterrorisbeingnurturedandseeksmyaide.Itismybeliefthatthiskillingisalsorelated.
aninterdimensionalserialkiller.Deluciasaid.
Iamhopingthatthisisnottruebutmyseerssayotherwise.
thekillerseemstobetargetingsocialsymbolsofthissociety.Monroebeganagain,Theexpatriates,
whomcontributestotheeconomy,thecheapasianlaborhiredtobuildourmonumentalbuildingsand
232

thesymbolofthefamilywhichisthebasicunitofsociety.Afullmoonrisestonight,andwithitIhaveto
calluponmyspiritguideagain,

AndthekillingsarenotouronlyconcernwhichIthinkDeluciahasgreaterknowledgeof
Jlitacigarette,Immanuellitacigar.Thiswasgettingtoomuchtohandle..
.therehasbeenabduction,thereisamysticalchild,agedseventeenandshehasbeenmissingfor
threedays.DoctorDeluciawillexplain.
Deluciasteppedupandbegan,thenineasceticsfrommopiumnoom,whomareundermycharge,had
beenwatchingthechildsinceherbirth.HernameisNicoleore,whoseotheraspectisconnectedtothe
Lorelineage.Thesourcesofmopiumnoomidentifiedherayearagoasthechildwhohadseensaul,who
isinsomewayconnectedtohim.Itisbelievedthathehadbroughthertotheotherside,fromaworld
thathadexperiencedanend,anapocalypse.Itwasthefirstandonlysignofsaulsincehisdisappearance
afterdivertingtheredidol.Nootherinformationcanbegleamedfromit,onlythatthechildseemstobe
importantinthecosmicschemeofthings.Nowsheismissinganditssomehowconnectedwiththe
killingsandof1000.100.thesourceshavementionedthatthemythofthechildisdocumentedinabook
calledtheredquiem.Writtenbyfiveauthorsthatdetailstheeventsoftheredidol.
andthatiswhy,MrWuexplained,wehadcalleduponanoutherpublisher,MrweedDjango.We
havetoretrievethatbooktolearnmoreofthechildandtohopefullmakethepicturealittlemore
complete.
Deluciacontinued,theotherbookisthatof1000.100,believedtobeawitnessaccountofcertain
fragmentaryeventsin1000.100whichcouldshedlightonthisseethingmystery.Thatbooktoomustbe
retrieved.
andwiththebooksathand,onlythencanwedecideonadirectiveonhowtobringsaulback.Foras
spokentomebytheemissaryfromthefield,saulappearstobetheonlykeythatcouldalterthecourse
oftheeventsthatisopccuringnow.
Deluciasaid,weneedeverybodyshelptoachievethis.Thethreatoftheoccultkillerisveryrealandis
intensifyingasthedayspass.
Monroeagreed,theoracleofordom,whomIservehashadvisionsandnightmaresofapossibleevent
thatwouldoccur.Amassslayingofsomesort.Amassmurder.
andwithDYSkilled,atsomestage,thepeoplewilllearnaboutthis.Afuneral,nomatterhowwell
hiddenwillcertainlycauseaninfluxofmassfollowerstothiscityofhisbirth.
233

itisourbeliefthatthekillingswillhappenthen,duringthegatheringoffanswhowillmournthelossof
theiridol.
thekillingofDYScouldpossiblybeonlythebait.
thousandswilldie,ifsomethingisnotdone

agrosslaughterbrokethesilence

ahahahahahaha
echoingfromallthewalls.Everyonestoppeddeadintheirspeaking.Their
thoughts.Jthoughtithadcomefromthegroup.Wubecamedeathlystill.

somethingswrongImmanuelsaid.thatwasthelastsanesentenceproduced.
Wasitanearthquakethathittheroom?Wastheviolenttremorsofabeastwalkingtowardsthe
houseofwu?Itwasalreadyhardtotell.Thegroundcrackedandbrokeopenwiththelaughter.Black
bubblingtaroozedoutofthecracks.Thestenchwasofrottingcorpsesandsewersanddecay.
Everyoneintheroombecamehorriblysick.Notimetodrawupprotection,notimetofigureouthow
theroomsprotection,underwu,wasbroken.Thepaintingsonthewallstartedburning,hugegaping
holesappearedontheceiling.kraaakaaararraa:

tothefield

AssdddduuSendJanddeluciaoutuaauaauaa
11!!!
Arruutetytywww
1! vBringsaulback Bringsaulback
Uioyttuioiblassftarrraeer!!

234

!Findingbooks
redquiem(ercondus) Bringsaulback Bringsaulback
1000.
Bringsaulback
Evolutionoftheofthe100stolenfromghos
leadstoalbu&chung)

destroyer(mara)Bringsaulback

Missions(findthemission!)
Funniehumanz/funnaemajiktianz!Fucking
fools!Holyfailurez~~!~deathiseatbetween
deeandh(hell)deathisdheat!DeathisEAH!
WEAHISDEATHE!

Youallspeaklikechildrenyouallspeaklikechildrenplayinglittlegamesinthegardennot
knowingwhatyoubattlenotknowingwhatyouwarwithandyourmindstoosmalltoowe
aktooimpotenttooinvaluable

Buildthereceptacleat71trapped
Imagesofbrokendoorshanging.Screamingmenfromthewhorerooms,peniseseatenoffbymonster
razorteethvaginas.Smokepouringfromopiumbreathnonstopbpdycombusting,fragileoldmen
runningbreakinglegs,breakingtorso.Doorknobsmelted,halfnakedchildrencrawlingthroughthe
hoelsinthewaa;;;lllthroughthewaaatrappedaaallllthroughthesskkkkyyyythroughtheee

235

Bringsaulback!!

Trapped

BRINGSAULBACKWEWISHTOEATHIM!

THEMONSTERROOSTERPECKSATTHESMALLHUMANS,WEILDGREATPOWERSARENAUGHT,
POWEREDOFGREATMINDSARENAUGHT,NOTHINGDEFEATSTHEONETHOUSAND.NOTHING
CONSUMESITSNIGHTTIMENIGHTMAREGROIN.THEMONSTERROOSTERSTOMPSANDEATSTHE
FLESHANDBONESOFTHESOULS,OFTHECHEAPWOMENTORNAPART.

GIVEUSTHEHEADOFWUGIVEUSTHEHEADOFWUGIVEUSTHEHEADOFWU
GIVEUSTHESOULOFSAULGIVEUSTHESOULOFSAULGIVEUSTHESOULOFSAUL

THISISWHERENINEAWAKES,TOFINDTHEROOMINTURBULENCEANDOMANDAEISGONE.

BOOKTHREE

236

GODDAMNITWILLYOULOOKATTHAT?!
Darispointingtothetv.AgiantChristmastreeinfrontofaworldclassshopping
centreisonfire.Thecamerashotisfromarovingnewshelicopter.Theblazeis
infernal.Aredandyellowtypeoffirelightingupthenight.Peoplearerunning
andstayingawayfromit.Halfadozenfiretrucksareonthescenetryingtoput
theblazeout.Reportsarecominginthatothershoppingdistrictshavetheir
Christmastreesburningupaswell.

theworldisfuckingcrazymyfriend.Itellhim,pouringmyselfanotherdrinkin
thelatenightoffice.ItisthelastweekofNovember.

Decemberisntevenhereyetandthemadnesshasbegun.Isuddenlyfeelalittle
sick,wouldyouopenthewindowwider?Please?

Icomply.

P@ULPFRICTIONPRESENTS

237

RACE&DAR-
OCCULTINVESTIGATORS
/smallpress
Thestinkfromthelitteredbeachrisesuptotheofficeintheheat
Wekeepthewindowopenbecausethefannolongerworks
Welearntodealwiththesmell.
Wehumanslearntodealwithmanythingsquickly
Ghostsandmurdersandglobalwarming
Suddenchangesinnarrativefiction,literature,pornography.
Foodbecomesfusion.
Webecomeusedtoitanditbecomesapartofourlives.
Wecarryonfromthere.
ItwasoneofthosehotNovembernights;
ThesecretsocietiesusuallycallsthisperiodDIRENOVEMBER
Ascarykindofnameisit?
Notforus.
Wereusedtothesesortsofthings.
LikeIsaid,
Welearntodealveryquickly.
switchthechannelman,theaftermidnightmonstershowiscomingon.
Iwanttoseeifpeopledied.Couldbegoodbusinessforus.Wecanprovidesances.
ghoshausdoesthat.Wedontwanttointrudeuponhisbiznezz.
238

whatthehellhappenedtohimanyway?Hisshopsbeenclosedforafewdaysalready.Notlike
him.
IdontknowandIdontcare.Switchthechannelalready.
Itwasdone.Theblackandwhitescreenflickeredtolifeafterthecolorfulpresentationon
burningChristmastrees.
goddamnit!darcursed.Abrightwhitemessagewasscrollingatthebottomofthescreen
warningpeopletoavoidthecitybecauseoftheburningtrees.Otherthanthattheoldmonster
showranasusual.
dealwithit.ItoldhimandIsettledbackintomychairwithafinedrinkinhand.
Thenthecallcame.

Justaboutnineminutesaftermidnight,intotheshowthebloodyphonerings.

dontanswerit.Darsaid.
couldbebusiness.
couldbeawhacko.
Imanswering.

SoIdid.
raceanddaroccultinvestigators,smallpress.Whatcani
youdarr?hecutmeoff.Ialreadyheardakindofpanicinhisvoice.
no,Imrace.Youneedtospeakwithdar?
itsok.Canyoutakeajob?
Darwaslookingatmeinpuzzlement.
whatkindofjob?whoisthis?
mynameisjohnpopeandImlookingfortwopeople.
239

hangonhangon.Ineedareferencefirst.
GhosHaus.
ghoseh?Somethinghecouldnthandle?
thatstheproblem.ThatswhyImcallingyou.hesmissing.Notaroundtohandleit.Heasked
metocallyouifhewasntaround.hesoundedscared.
alright,alright.SoIguessthisisoccultrelatedworkandnotliterature?
Itsboth.Ineedyoutohelpmefindtwopeople.Twolostbooks.Thisisveryveryimportant.
Isatupstraight.
Thiswasgettinginteresting.Imotioneddartoturndownthetv.
wellneedtomeetinperson.Itoldhim.
canwedoitnow?
yeswecan,doyouhaveouroffice
notatyouroffice.Inapublicplace.Acafmaybe.Isthatalright?
um,sure.Theresa24hourcafnearAtonstreet.Youknowwhich?
yes.Yesnearatonisgoodtoo.Illseeyouthere.Twothirty?
twothirtyitis.Howwouldweknowitsyou?
Illhaveafedoraandcoaton.wontmissme.
alright.WellcometoyouMisterPope.Andwellneedanadvancefirst.
howmuch?
openingfeeofdiscussion.Firstthreehours.Fivehundred.
notaproblem.Twothirty.PleasedontbelateIhatewaiting.Seeyouthere.
yeah.
hehungupfirst.Icouldfeelhispanicseepingintomybones.
whatwasthat?Darasked.
240

work.Wantsustofindtwopeopleconnectedtoboththeoccultandliteraturecircles.
Somethingabouttwolostbooks.
oooh,shouldbeinteresting,weleavenow?
nah,twohours.Wecanfinishthisshow.
righton.DarpoppedopenabeerandIcrunchedonpeanuts,watchingthemonstermovie.

ARTNAMTROPICS.SPACETIMEKELTA.ELEVENTHHUNDREDCYCLEINTHESUNSOFOU.

THEENTRAILSOFSTARANDSAND
EXPIRESINTHEHEARTOFTHETOMBfal,thebeloved

ICANNOTNOTREADTHELANGUAGEONTHEGOLDCANOFDRINK.IHAVECONSUMEDIT,SIPBYSIP
FORALMOSTANHOURBEFOREITISALLGONE.ITSWIMSINMYBLOODSTREAMFEEDINGMEITSOWN
LANGUAGEANDDESIRES.IHAVESMOKEDTENCIGARETTESFROMTHEOTHERISLES.THEFIELDSWHERE
POISONGREWINTOTHELEAVESTHATWEREHARVESTEDFORIT.IHAVESUCKEDONTHEORANGEPILL
(HALFOFIT)ANDITWASALREADYACTINGONMYMIND.

InthedistanceIcanhearthebombsbeingdropped.Itwillbesaferhereintherottinghut.Themassof
junglesaroundmewillkeepmesafe.Iburythehalfsmokedcigarettesinthesoilexposedbythebroken
floorboardsontheground.ThesoiliswetandIthoughtofthebloodandrainithadsoakedupthedays
before.Iaminmyfinaldescent.Theinsectsdoesnotstayawayfrommybandagedleg.Myfeethave
beenamputatedbythevillagemedicineman.Hehadgivenmetheherbstoconsume.Ittakesawaythe
241

pain.Isuspectafeveriscominguponme.Irocktoandfrobeforethismachinebeforeme.Iamwriting
tosavemylife.Thereisnotmuchdgnityinthelossofmankindinaplacelikethis(thebombsarestill
beingdroppedinthefardistanceofthetropics.Theheatisslowlyeatingawaymymemoriesandthe
ebbandtideofmyheart.Icanonlyfeelforthewilderthings.Icanonlyfeeltheabyseethatcreepslike
vinbesaroundthisrottinghut.Themindasksfornomorebreeze.Theactofcoolingdownisfalse.There
isonlyheatandrainanddementiasettingin.theechoesoftheraindropsonthemakeshiftroofvcauses
atribalrhythmtorisewithinme.tonight,thelandsandIconverge.Iamnaked,theclotheslongburntto
providewarmthinthedreadedwinterofthewar.(gunfireeruptsinthedistance.)hereitisalwaysnight.
Thecanopyofthejunglekeepstheraysaway.Thestalerisingcorpseoftheearthisexhumed.Iamin
paralysiswithitsownrising.Iamdiseasedinthemindofthehutthatismypsyche.Thisroomwhichis
myheart,decomposes.Iamwritingheretosavemylife.Soonthemachinedies.Withitmysecretsdie.
Wherewillbetheexpedition?Howmuchmoremenwilltheyloseinsearchofmydeadbody?Ifeelthe
hutclosinginonme,slowlylikeabreathinganimal.Hairhasfallenoffinclumpsfrommyhead.Painis
settingintomyfingers.Theinsectscrawlontheoldbloodstainsofmycutofffeet.Myarmsachefrom
overdoingtherituals.Thevillagersnolongerarrivehere.Theghostshavelongbeendeparted.Acertain
memoryisbeingfedtome.(morebombsgooffandIheartheplanesofterrorscreampastabove.A
shotofmaniccondorsscreamingacrosstheskies.Bloodisslowlycomingoutfromundermynails.Each
contactwiththekeyboardcomeswithadifferentsetofpainandmotive.Iamwritingtosavemylifein
thejunglesraptwithwarandspoilsandmadgenerals.Ihearthewhistlingofabomb.Ithitscloseto
home,theearthshakeslikeaviolentfitofanangryman.Dirtandoilrainupontheroof.Wateriswelling
fromthesoilexposedinthefloorboards.Thehalfflowersaretakingcontrolofthestomachandthe
abdomenandthefrontallobe.Theheartbeatslikeacoldlifelessthing.Ihavesurpassedhungerweeks
before.(gunfireerupts)Iplaywiththesoilinmyhands.Asmalldosageforthisfever.Asmallgiftfrom
thefactorisofabroadwhomknownotofourplight.Ipickthebonesoffmyancestors.Inaheapthey
laybroken.Skinfallingoffslowly.Iconsumeiteverytwodaystolive.Iamgainingtheknowledgeofmy
elders.Themedicinetakeschargeandgivesallpainmeaning.Painisagiftfromgod.Depressionan
disolationandalonenessthegiftofdeitiesforgotten.Howimpulsivetheerrorofourways,praying
theseburdensbegone.Donotbitethehandthatfeedsyou.youarenotlikeaserpent.Whereissleep
nowallthesemonths?(abombblastgoesoffinthedistance.Whereisourfeveredsanity?The
wildernessoffernorespite.Therearedarkdoorsinthismonstrousnature.Therearewaysthahtlead
tothedeadandtheliving.Theinsectsincreaseinnumbers.Iamaccompaniedbythewildbeeetlles,
cometowatchmedie.Ipickthemofftoconsumethem.Icrunchtheirblackbrittlebodieswithmy
teeth.Idevourthebugstogaintheknowledgeofmovementthroughfearandshadows.Foritisfear
andshadowsthatlayaheadofme,aheadofitstime.Iamanelementcaughtinthesuperstitionofthe
surprised.Theoldpictureofthewhitehairedmanstaresback.Hiscardfromtheothercountrycursed
withthedoingsofmymankind.(machinegunfireerupts.)thereisanoiseunheardcomingfromthe
wildaroundthedecomposedhut.Theairturnsschizophrenic.Fromheattowintercold.Fromdryness
tosogginess.Flowerstomud.Withthealreadyrustybladeonthemakeshiftbrokentable,Icutoff
anothersmallpieceofmyfleshandIfeedittotheheadofthemonster.Themaghgotsandfliesand
raventurespickatthedeadmonstershead.Thebeheadedmammoththatsitsonthefloorbesideme,
prophesying.Istumbletothecabinetthatwouldnotremainshut.Irummageforthemedications.
Expiredafterthirtyyears..fromtheragthatcollectstherainwaterfromtheweepingtrees,Isqueeze
242

outenoughintotheskullcup.Icrunchthebitterpillsandwashitdownwithrainwater.Thefever
escapesmeandmybloodisreptiliancold.Amortargoesoffnearandthegroundshakes.Theinsects
havecometothebed,Ifinishtherainwater,withinvocationscloudingmyhead.Betweenthejumbleof
spellsandmemoriesIstruggletounderstandthebookunfurlingbeforeme.Itwistinthegloryofits
dignifiedshape.Ipayrespectstoitsdeadelders.CrushingthegoldcanofdrinkIlightanothercigarette
roll.Iseethecentipiedcrawlfromtheholeintheground.Icrushitsheadwithmyfingers.Thewrithing
bodyIconsume,togainknowledgeofalienterrain.Ofjourneyingthroughtheunderground.Quickly,
thestrainoftheorangepillwanes.Thenbitternessofthecentipiedenrapturesmytongue,Ispeakliket
hewaythewormsspeakingraves.Ispeakforhedesceaedbeforethemonumentofthemammoth
head.ThroughitseyesIextractitsprimalmemory.Thebloodaroundtheheaddriesup.Iscrapeitoff
thefloorwithmyunkemptnails,longandbittenandjagged,uscrapethedriedbloodanditbecomes
likepowder.Whateverisleftthereisthensnorted.ThebloodrugofthedeadmammothofUL.BETTER
TOBEBLACKANDBLANKthantoignorethecriesfromthewilderness,.(anotherrbombgoesoff,:the
fightingwillnotend.Thiswarwillneverend.Thescarsonmyarmsareopeningup.adesperatethirsting
lusttobebeexposedintheheatoftheair.Itseeksfreedominanotherrbody.Myhairfallsoffmorein
clumps.Theradiationravishesmeintherottingheartofthehut.Iseetheflowerscloseinmymind.A
bloominginreverse.Itsuckstheairitfromoutside.Oxygendepleteswiththemind.Thefeetisthemost
endangeredofspecies.Iwillnolongerwalkthissoilbutwalkelsewhere(gunfire)wherandwhenwill
theinsectoidcomenext?Iwillstudytheirclassicroutes.Thewayfaringthroughtthiswildnessoutside.
Throughmyporestheliquidofthisbodyearthexpires.Soakingthestrawmattress,soakingthewooden
floors.Thesoilisfeditsnutrients.Iurinateintothecornerssothatthemothertreeswouldgrowwell
withrichfruit.OfsuchfruitsIwillpartakeandImysoulwillrevelinthemarvelinitsexplicitbitter
formationsoftheuniverse.HalfinstateandcomaIdreamoftheslugsasIrisetomykneestoexplore
theeverchangingswallsofthehut.(bombsexplode.Threehits.Airraids.Theyarenotcomingforme.
theyhavenodepravityforsuchajudgementagainstme.whatisthecurseofnotdyingthisway?What
isthepricecommandedforthiswildexposure.Iseethelightsofathousandsuns,Iseethestarsthey
inspireinnighttimejungle,thecanopyftreeshidingthesplendourofnight.Andiwishafallingstara
timelydeath.Iwishforitmansheartbreakinggeniusofgracefkldeclines.Amillionwritingsinsymbols.
Archaictextsilluminatesintheparchmentofmind.Isourceforcigarettes.Thecabinetrattleswithmy
derangedhands.Thesedationofatempestuousengine.Thesensationofdignifieddeathandrest-state.
NolongerhaveIsoughtthehandofAZA.Burstdooropening.Icannotbepaidattention.Ideciphernot
thebarkingofdogs.Ofgutsfallingoutofholesinthestomach.TouchthemanTOUCHTHEMAN!Itis
myillhandthatcures.Itakeontheafflictionsofsleepanddepravity,thecrossofheirbattlements.I
touchtheman.Thestormdoorsopenandshut.Stiflingheatreturnslikeaprodigalwind.Theheatisno
moreintensethanthefever.Recollectingisthetroubleoftheinquiringmind.Thesecretsstaredback.
Thesecretsstaredbacktoknowme.waterofdirtspitsinthroughtheopenedroof.Farbeyonditthe
skylinefractures.Thetheterminalsundrawsuponitsbloatedneighbor,insecretorgasmtheynebulae.
Burstsofworldsendingfarabove(anairraidsweepandthebombsdisturbtherestingremainsofthe
earth.Tallmotherlesstreessheddingbarkandskinandlife.Theleavesfallofflikerainandlitteresthe
surroundingofthehouse.Agangereneeatsthearm.OutofabluecanIfeeditsdarkbloodtothe
wound.Motherwoundwhosewombbisalsodefiledinthemannersofthiswar(bombsshakethe
foundations.Itisgettingclose.InmysicknessImustthencallouttotheboy.IntohisheadIimplantthe
243

evidenceofmyexistentialism.Iseethetreeoflifewithitsbranchesswirlinglikespirals.Iseethesigilsin
thenakedbark,likecuttingintotheskinthesymbolsofhealing.Somethinginsidemeisscreamingandit
witnessestheweepingangel.Thelanguageonthebluecanoffersnoinsight.Mylungsareeatenaway
buttopersististotaketherightpointofexecutiontheinsectoidsreturnandthesurgerycontinues.
Graftingsinfromthechest.TheinkedfleshaplaceIusedtogothemountainofthegreattriunestands
onthealienhorizon.Gloriousdesertlife.Icrushthegoldencan.(machinegunfire)Icrushthe
medicationandburntheboxwithfirecalleddownbythegods.

Timeandguitandspaceisonlyinthemind.Imthelivingdeadthinginthecoffinofmyowndevising.
Mypowersextrapolate.Mtqueensareweeping.Doorburstopen.Moredeadsoldiersarecarriedinby
sleeplesscomradesbloodpumpingheartmarchingtothetribalwardrums.Touchthemen!TOUCHTHE
MEN!Thisgoesonforsolong.Extinguishcigaretteuntomynakedflesheatingin.mymindscreamsand
Itouchthemen.Theyrise.Theyrise.Andtaketheirweapons.Norestforthewarring.Irunthelotionof
waruponmybody.Thebloodofwoundedsoldiers.Iwashmyselfcleanwiththeirbitterbleeding.Atthe
fingertipsofmymadnessIfindtheprofound.Thedavesofthecutopenandcloselikebehemoth
mouths.Thevineshangingfromabovebreakintotherooflikesnakesofillnature.Thetentaclelike
thingsgropeinthedarkfortheirmaster.Ifeelthebandagesaroundmylegsloosen.Morefleshand
boneistakenfrommebyanunseenhand.ThemachinebeforemewhirrsandIwritetosavemylife.The
fingers,hurting,bangoutthemovementofthejunglesoutside.Theheartbeatsthumpinthedark.
(bombshitthegroundsagain)machinegunfire.Theroomheatsuplikeasickchild,bedridden.Myhead
swimsintheclarityofthegoldenliquidsinthegoldercans.ThroughthebrokenroofsIsearchthe
canopyofthetrees.ThroughtheburntandrottingleavesItrytoseekoutthestars,readingitlikethe
entrailsofdeadmonsters.Theheadofthemammothbreaksneartheskull.Termitesescape,scattering
liketerrifiedthings.Theyfloodtheroom,anenedlessprocession,takinguptheirplaces,likemarkerson
afloorboardthatistheuniverse.Theycrawlupthebedtogreetmelikealostking.Beholdthe
derangementofULbeholdthediseaseofITA~doorburstopen.Thegeneralsunifrmistornfromhis
body,hisribsareexposed.TouchmeTOUCHME!Ihealhim.Hetakesmybloodiedhands.Wemustgo,
wecannotholdthemback!Moremenpourin,theirfacesdistortedwithfatiguebutthebloodthey
drinkfrommyveinskeepthemburningliketheundead.Theyplacemeintoamakeshiftstretcher,pile
themachineuntomychets,thegoldencanstheycarrywithemintotheirsacks.Thecabinetstheyempty.
Themammothheadtheyritualizeandwrapintheskinanduniformsoftheirenemy.andtheytakeme
awayunderthecoverofmanicgunfire.Quicklystronglythepullmefromthescene,leavingsmokeand
therottinghutbehind.Uintothewilderness,intothewilderness.
Thesoundofgunfireandbombsrecedesanditnolongermasksthehowlingofthecreatures.Themen
whocarrymeareterrifiedbutvigilant.Throughtiredbattlewearyeyestheysearchthedarknessand
pullmethroughthewilderness.Master,master,whichstardowefollow.Itrytoseethroughthe
canopyofthejungle.Theburningthird.Theydigouttheirarchaicinstruments,theytapthestonesin
thefaceofthepalatte.Theywakethewormsinthevialshungabouttheirnecks.Theyconsultstranger
thingsthenfollowtheinstructions.Theburningthirdtheburningthird.Isenseonlyahandfulofmen
left.Maybetwogenerals.Tenmen.ThetwelevefollowingabedriddenChrist.Thehunglesbecome
244

thickerandthejourneyheadstowardstheburningthird.Thegroundsdescendandascendandtwists
andturns.Vineshangdownandblockourpaths.Bladesandparangscutthroughbuttheygrowback
quickly.Theedadanddirtydeitiesarecarroedinmakeshiftboxes.Thehaironourheadsmustbe
continuallyshavedoff.Abrasionsafflictsus.Ahungerofthesoulavailsus.Wejourneyforthwithout
stopping,thehowlingsofthecreaturesfollowusbutnoneattack.Weareaprocessionintheirhaunted
habitat.Theyaccompanythepassagewetread.TERRIBLERAINBEGINSTOFALL.AWHITEWASHOF
HEAVENSPISS.Wecampoutbetweentwobehemothtrees.Thementaketurnstowatch.Nofireisset
toavoiddetectionbytheenemies.Weregroup,recoverinthedarkness.youmustbringmetothe
dawn.Itellthegeneral.afterashcrowsgrace,hiswaywillleadyou.behegone,whatthen?we
concernourselveswhensuchistrue.Hecheckshisweapons.whenwillthisend?heasks.Idonot
know.whenthejungledieswediewithit.wemustkeeponfighting.Helooksuptheskies,the
rainscomeandgoastheywill.Heatreturns.Itisnowondermymenaresosick.theearthpoisonsour
mindtoo.wemustfightagainstourownterrors.Ourownillnesses.Hedistributesthelastofthe
goldendrinkcans.Itellthemwemustgo.beforetherainscomeagain.Thisisthefinalleg.Tothelast
houseofashcrowthecrippled.Weshouldnotlosetime.Withmuchhopethelasthousewillbethefinal
stop.Wecanleavethefightingtotheothersthen.Nomoreshallourcompanybedeparted.Nomore
lossshallweinherit.Theypickmeupandthemachines.Wemoveonfollowingtheburningthird.The
howlinghadrecededandasilencetooaliveengulfsus.Wecrunchonthedeadbranches,movethrough
thewilderness.Nomentalkbuttheyallholdtheirweaponsupright.Ireflectuponthelosttimehere.I
watchthewearygeneralsmarchon.facecakedinsoilandblood.Ifeelthelastremainingpowersofthe
dirtydeitiesintheboxes.Whatwillhappenwhenallmeaningofthisislostbythetimewereachthe
hutofashcrow?Willthecripplebringitbacktolife?Willthetideturntheninhishand?Icontemplate
devastation.Icontemplatethemiseriesofthehundredplusstrongmennowreducedtotweleve.The
finaldisciplesonthisdespicablepathtothetwistedgesthemane.
Theearthgrowssofteraswetreadon,itishardertowalk.Themensaythattheboxesodthedeitiesare
gettingheavier.Theheadofthemammothgettinglighterinitstombcarriedbyfourmen.Itisfinished
whentheprophesyingstops.Thegeneralssay.Wemustmoveaheadfasterbutthemenaretootired.
Thebleedingofmylegshavebegunagain.Feveresanddeliriumsriseandfallwithshorterintervals.
Thereisnothutheretocontainit.Itescapesinthewild.Descentdescent.Theslopepullsusintothegut
ofthehungles.Intotheheartofentanglement.Theboxesmustnowbecarriedabovethehead.The
weaponsgetstuckintherootsclawingthebodiesofthemen.Thecrammedproximityofthethinvines
whisperdelusionalthings.Thesanityofthemenareslowlywhihsperedaway.Onegeneralkillshimself.
Thegunshotasuddenbreakofthesilence.Ashock,aloss,adisorientation.Wegotnotimetoburythe
deadItoldthelastgeneral.Wekeepmoving.Nomorespeechisleft.Theslopetakesusdeeperdown.A
noiseofdisturbancebeginsahead.Rustling,movement.Thenoiseincreasesthenbrustingthroughare
hundredsofblackcrows.Thecawingaterribleshriek.Therapidflappingofblackwingsarushofstatic.
Themendropme,theydroptothefloorterrified.Arushofnoiseanbovenowthengone.Leavesfalllike
rain.Deadrootsspittingandhittingtheexpedition.ashcrowisnearItellthegeneral.Weareclose.I
hearthesoundofeaglesabove.Thenmachinegunfire.Fourmenaretakenout.Returnfireexplodes.
Strobelightsoffire.Adiscointhewilderness.Thetreestoredownarounddus.Themenshieldedthe
deitiesandthemammothheadwiththeirbodies.Branchesstabbedandsliced.Irolledthroughthe
245

sinkingsoils,touchedwhoeverIcould.Raisedthemup.fightbackfightback.Twistedwoundsinmy
body.Thepassionofsaulthepassionofsaul.Thegenralgrabbedmyarm,carriedme.underthecover
offireweescapeddownward,fartherintothegutofthewild.Thegunfirefollowedus.Mendropped.
Thegeneralstopped.Itouchedthem.Theyroseandfoughtagain.Hotshellsburntskin.Wewereclose.
Icouldseethenestsoftheravens,ofthecrows.Abortedeggsinthecarriageoforganicclumpsofhair.
Therearesevenofusleft.Icannolongerraisetheothers.Thehowlofthecreaturesreturnedandic
ouldseehugethingsleapingfromtreetotreeaboverainingdownuponusthedebrisofthevast
movements.Gunfireeruptedupwardsandathingcamecrashingdownnexttous,boneandblood
splatteringagainstus.Apanicofcrowseruptedandhaphaszardlyflewinblindpanic.Adietysboxwas
dropped,itscarriertakenbyahowlingthingandliverounds.Anothersoldiertookuptheboxbeforeit
wasstolen.Undercoverfireherejoinedthedescendinggroup.Downwarddownwardintotheswamp
placeofAshcrowthecrippled.Agreatdarknessfollowedus.Wepassedthehollowedouttrees.Very
close/themakeshifttempleswerealreadyseen.BEGONEDARKNESS!BEGONETHELURKTHAT
PURSUES!BEGONEHORRORSOFHOWLING!Thevoiceofashcrowrushedthroughus,pastusintothe
darknessbehind.Liketheslaughterhousesofold,liketheshreddingofgruesomeskin,theenemieswere
takenbythewordofthecrippled.Treesfellwiththehowlingthings.Gunfireceased.Thesoundofmetal
weaponsfallingaparttrembledthegrounds.Inthefinalexhalationofecstacytwomoremendied,
writhinginoprgasmtothevoiceofashcrowthewarlockofthewilds.COMEHOMETOITASNEST!
COMEHOMETOTHEPASSAGEOFASH!Thetemplebirdsroseagushofair.Indeliriumthegeneralfell
tohisknees,hurtingarmsraisingthemammothheadtoitsnewmaster.beholdthethingofprophesy
thatcallsyourname,beholdtheboxeddeitieshungeringforyourtouch.Theremainingmenofferedthe
boxesbeforethemandoutofthewildcamethecrippledking.Ashcrowthedivine.Ashcrowthel
imbless.Ashcrowtheblind.Carriedbythenakedasceticshecameforth.Hisgarmentmadefromtorn
soldiersunirmsofdeadenemies.Skullsofthedefilershungabouthisneck.Thewhiteofhiseyesglowed
inthedarkness.Icouldnotbelievewehadreachedthefinalhouse.Mostofmypowerarealreadygone
butinthepresenceofashcrow,thepromiseisreturned.Thefinalhourdescends.Thestenchofdeath
isleftbehindandthetiredmenfalltothemuddyground,embracingjourneysend.Theasceticscarried
usin.thegeneral.Twoothersandi.asoftrainhadbeguntofall.Likeablessingforaparchedland,a
blanketforwinterscold.Icouldnolongertelldarknessfromnightbutwithinthebrokenbones,the
flayedskin,thethickcreepingbloodIsensedthecompassionofnight.Nightthatpromisedtherisingof
asun,asunIsolongcouldnotbehold.ithasbenetoolongandtoofarforyouashcrowspoketome.I
couldonlymumur.somanydeadyouhaveraised,somanygodsyouhavesaved,somanychildrenyou
haveledandnowyourcycleiscomingtoanend.Toofarandtoolongyouhavegoneandthepromise
madeshallbefulfilled.Intothistempleyoushallenteranduponyourexit,youshallreturnforatower
risesforyou.aninvocationisbeingwritten.Youhavewrittentosaveyourlifeandnowyourlifeisbeing
returnfortheotherstobesaved.Andwiththat,thelimblessonetouchedmymind,myheartandmy
soulandIwasdeliveredintothesun.
Thewhalesongsechoed.Carriedadriftbythesoftcurrents.Inblueocean,intheseaofAiRaiamcarried.
Thewatersfixme.thewatershealme.Iamdriftinginanoceanofsleep.Thewhalesongscaressme.
airalovesme.
246

Eveninmyabsence.Theworldoutsidechanges.IdonotfearthatIwouldnolongerrecognizeit.Ifear
thatIdonotrecognizemyselfwhentheworldreflectsme,likeamirrorofexistence.Idriftoutsidetime.
Idonotlettimetouchme.Idriftinthememoryofsatellitesandsuns.IdriftasIhadforyears.Idrift
becauseIamguiltyandbecauseIamsaved.Idrift.Isleepanditfeelslikeforever.

Timedisappears.Spacereappears.Ifeelthepresenceofmyownbody.ThefloorIamonisfreezingcold
butitbringsdownmyfever.Tonormaltemperature.Tonormalcy.Myeyesightadjuststothegentle
fallingofwhatlookedlikesnow.Aslowsoftswirloflightsnowfallingtotheground.Achildisnextto
me.nakedandpurethoughshedoesnotseemhuman.Herskinissnowwhite.Itisherskinthatis
flakingoffherarms.Iseesmallbreastsbutnonipples.Iseehercrotchbutitssmoothandcurvedwithno
opening.Ilookupintohereyesanditscrystalclear.Herhairissoftandwhite.Shesmilesatmebutdoes
notsayaword.Aira.Iknowhernameisairaandshescleaningmywoundswithagleamingsilver
tweezerwithwhitecottonclampedbytheendofthetweezers.Sheiscleaningthewoundsonmyfeet.
Shedabsgentlyatthewounds,nowslowlyclosing.Regenerating.Comingbacktolife.Iamnakedbut
unashamed.Nooneshouldeverfearagoddess-childhealer.
Shelooksmeintheeyesagain.Iamatpeacewithher.themooninlibra.Adeepinnerpeace.Shelooks
atmywoundsandIcanseesheseemsalittlesaddenedbyit.Shefinallyspeaks.Softly,likeacaton
velvetsnow.whydoyouwalksomuch,insuchplaces?Ithinkaboutitforawhile.Iknowsheis
patientwithme.itsalongstory.Itellher.wevegotalittletime.Shesays.Ismileather.theshort
versionthen.ok.Asmalllightglowsinhereyes.Suchalovelychild.

AndItellhermytale.

Themonstermovieendedonacheesyclichdnote.Killedbyafallingtree.Thestupidthing.Butthe
heroinegruntingandpanting,hackingthattreedownturnedmeonandthensome.MaybeIcouldfind
awhoreafterourcharwithpanickymrpope.Weleftthehouseat2.20a.m.thecafwasjustseven
mintutesaway.Enoughtimetobuysomecoffee,settleinlightacigaretteandcommencecollecting
moneyfordoingwhatwedo.

Youworkinthisbusinesslongenoughandyoucometoappreciateallsortsofenergies.Ilove
theenergiesofmyofficeinthisarea.Hell,Ilovetheenergiesofthisarea.Threestreetsaway
fromwhereweworktherearewhorehouses.Rowsandrowsofemwithfreshonescomingin
247

allthetime.Whenthejobgetsyoudownoryourealittlespookedfromyourfindingsor
whateverjustheadonovertooneofthesehousesandyourtroubledareegoneafterhalfand
hourandthirtybucks.Thebetteronesgoforahundredandwithtwo,youcangettheexotic
ones.Tworoundsmindyou.ninetyminutes.Andwhenyou[redone,justcrossoverandhavea
beer.Thebarnevercloseshere,evenintheshoppingcentre.Thewholeshoppingmallisopen
twentyfourseven.Theplacetobeifyoureahardcorenocturne.Thankgoodnessitstarted
drizzlingagainbecausetheheatwasgettingtobe.Darneverreallybotheredwiththeheator
thecold.Hejustbotheredabouthefoodandthedirnksandthewomenandofcourse,thejob.
Darsonehellofaninvestigator.Onehellofapoet.HecrackscaseslikesomeSherlockholmes.
Outsidehisdulldrunkexteriorliesahiddengemofamind.Beenworkingwithdarfornearly
ninedamnyearsandhestillsurprisesme.wetookthelongerroutetothecaf.Wantedto
checkoutthegoodsstandingoutsidetonight.Thedrizzlechasedsomeoftheminbutno
matter.Plentymorewouldhangaroundstill.Allmyregularfavouriteswasstillaround.maybe
itwastooearlyforthemtobepickedupyet.Oneofthemblewmeakiss.Shewasagoodone
whenweerachedthecaf,themaninthefedorahatwasalreadythere.Wesawhimfromthe
outside,playingwithhiscoffeemug.Heseemedalittlenervous.Thechimeshangingbythe
doortinkledaswecamein.notmanypeoplearoundthisThursdaynight.Thejukeboxwas
playinganEurhythmicssong.Herecomestherainagain.Aptmagicasitstartedpouringheavier
outside.Wegotoutofitjustintime.Mrpop?iaskedhimashelookedupatus.yes,yes
hestoodup.Iwavedhimdown,thisisDar,andImrace.Goodtomeetyou.
yes,samehereplease,sitdown.CanIgetyoucoffe?
Illhaveabeerdarsaid.
Illtakemycoffee,black.
goodgoodletmeorder.
Heseemedexcited,almostrelievedtoseeus.Icouldtellhewasreadytoexplodewithstories.
Hewasanxioustostarttalkingrightaway,asifhewasrushingtogetthemenialdrinkorders
outoftheway.Hegotup,startedwalkingtothecafscashierthenhestopped.Wesawhim
shakinghishead.Heturnedandcameback,mutteringtohimself,ortous,wewerenotsure.
nononononohekeptstaringattheground..areyouokmrpope?darasked.
wehavetogohesaid.heawasalreadyleadingthewayoutofthecaf.Walkingwithhishands
inhispockets.toldyoucouldbeawhacko.
shutupdarjustfollowhim.Weleftthecaf.

248

Inthedistance,Icouldhearfiretrucks.Andwewereheadingthatdirection.

whatsgoingmrpope.Youcantalktous.Daryelledafterhim.Iwakledfaster.
IthoughtIcouldstopit.IthoughtIcouldstopthem.Johnkeptrepeating.theyrehere.
Therewasfearinhisvoice.
Icaughtupwithhim.Putmyhandonhisshouldertostophimwalking.
Hemutteredashekeptwalkingthegeneral.Andhisfather.Andhisghost.theyrehere
heyjohn,stop!Igrippedhisshoulderalittleharder,hebrokeawayfromandspuntowards
me,hiseyeswerered.Glowingred.Itoldyou!theyarehere!Itsalreadyhappening!
whatis!weyelledathim.
Hefroze.Exhaledslowly.Thenwhispered.wealmostcouldnthearhim.
1000100
heturnedandwalkedagain.Withoutnoticingthegrowingsirens,tworoaringfiretrucks
stormedbyandthatswhenjohnpopestartedrunning.Followingthetrucls.
Weranaferhim,tryingtohearwhathewassaying.
thefire!Thefire!
thenawhite14foottruckscreechedbyandjammedbreaknexttous.climbin!theChinese
mansaidthroughhiswounddownwindow.WINGFARgtanntsyouandyourfriendrunningup
theresafepassage.
WINGFAR.Ithoughttomyselfasweclimbeduntothetruckjustasitstartedrevvingupto
chasedownjohnpope.WINGFARtheoccultitemstransportationserviceofATONstreet.The
suddenappearanceofalargeIndianmanatthebackofthetruckwithusstarledme.Iam
albu,hesaid.IrecognizeyoutwoasRaceandDAR.Iknowyuareinvestigatorsandnot
necessarilyoccultists.ButIsuggestyoudrawupsomekindofwarmagicagainstthesitewere
goingto.
ThetruckjammedbreakagainandwealmostflewforwardintoAlbu.HeturnedtoJohn.Mr
Pope!WINGFARgtantsyousafepassage.Comein.Thepassengersidedoorflewopen.John
lookedattheChinesemanbehindthewheel,thenatus.Hewaspantinghard,hiseyesglowing
249

redder,helookedlikesomepossessedshellofaman.Hedecidedtogetinandthetrucksped
off,chasingthefiretrucks.
theHouseofWUisunderattack.Albutoldus,wearenotsureiftherearecasualties.Mr
FARsentusonstrictorderstopickyouthreeupanddeliveracontainmentchestofofspellsto
thesite.Hesaidoneofyouisaghostlistener,andifitsnotyoutwothenitmustbejohn.nah
uh,notus.
defendyourpsychesandyoursouls,IdonotknowwhathasbefallenthehouseofWU.He
disappearedintothetruckagain.Iknewaboutthehouseofwu.Iknewsomekindofsorcerer
judgeranhisbusinessthere.Alongsideanopiumdenandwhorehouse.Iheardrumorsofa
gatheringtheretonightandnow,somethingbadhashappened.Darfinallyspokeagain.
oneminuteyourewatchingmonstermoviesandnowwerefightingmonsters?
Idontknow.Meditateordoyourinvocations.Thisisprobablyveryserious.
nokidding.Albuandchung?Ionlyknowthemasstories.
thestoriesarerealmyfriend.Asrealasthis.

SECT

BythecommandofThegeneral,fortheactoftheeleveninthehall,wewatchourfirstvictim.
16yearoldmariechong,

BythecommandofThegeneral,fortheactoftheeleveninthehall,wewatchoursecond
victim.SeventeenyearoldstudentJaniceteo

250

BythecommandofThegeneral,fortheactoftheeleveninthehall,wewatchourthirdvictim.
16yearoldnatashinelee

BythecommandofThegeneral,fortheactoftheeleveninthehall,wewatchourfourthvictim.
19yearoldjudyday

BythecommandofThegeneral,fortheactoftheeleveninthehall,wewatchourfifthvictim.
18yearoldEileensun

BythecommandofThegeneral,fortheactoftheeleveninthehall,wewatchoursixthvictim.
17JessicaleiaEe

BythecommandofThegeneral,fortheactoftheeleveninthehall,wewatchourseventh
victim.
17Joycechan

BythecommandofThegeneral,fortheactoftheeleveninthehall,wewatchoureighth
victim.
20lanaTan

BythecommandofThegeneral,fortheactoftheeleveninthehall,wewatchourninthvictim.
19yearoldRachelTay

BythecommandofThegeneral,fortheactoftheeleveninthehall,wewatchourtenthvictim.
18veronicaang
251

BythecommandofThegeneral,fortheactoftheeleveninthehall,wewatchourlastvictim.
16melodyChin

FROMSTARLIGHT,IWATCHPIECESOFTHEMACHINEBREAKDOWN.ATERRIBLE
WASTEUPONTHEHOUSEOFWU.

BynightlightIwatchthefivetryingtofightthefire.Theyhavelefttheghostlistenerinthe
truck,tohisownmadness.Likeunsurechildren,raceanddarrunaboutthebordersofthe
policeline.Albuandchung,lugginganoldwarchestthroughthecrowd.Allofthem
believingtheyareworkingbymagic.Ihaveamelancholyforsuchpassionatecreatures.I
admiretheirprudence,theirinnocence,theiryoungandbusydays.Iadmirethewaythey
leadtheirlives.Iadmiretheirmartyrdom.Thoughtheytooplayedtheircricualparts,
thoughtheyfightlikebravesoldierstotheend,theendistheonlythingthereforthem.
AccordingtothemanuscriptsoffutureAi-Fi.Thefivewillalsodie.Theywillendinthegulf
ofmadness.Theywillend,likeanabsurdistdrama,bythepluckofacosmicmonster
rooster.

Somewhere,theuniverseislaughing.

Butendnight,Iclosetheoculussetupontheglobe.Thelightofitsnebulafadingaway.I
returntotheproperconsciousness,totheplacewhereIamawaiting.Ireturntothe
watchtower,settothesignoftheeast.Iwaitforitsdreamwritertowake.Ireturntohim
andhereturnsfromrapideyesleep.

252

November27,2007

MonseuirEnreed,awokefromanoperaticnightmareandwasimmediatelydisoriented.He
wassurehewaslyingdownbuthewaslookingupatarowofshelveswithbooksonthem.
Nothingwasfallingdowntowardshim.Whentheinitialdizzinesssubsided,hesatupand
tookinanotherhypnoticsight.Therewerebillionsandbillionofwordswrittenonawhite
wallbeforehim.Tohisleftwasatablesetfromthewall/thetopwasfacinghimandthere
wasa12cardsaulaspreadopenedtohim.Tohisrightwasanotherwallwithangold
terbanacleboxprotrudingfromit.Itsgolddoorswereflungopenandinsideinwasa
handgun.Beforeenreedcamethebook.

Splintered.mind./monogram.
Heopenedthebook.

Onthefirstpageitread.

Tableofcontinuation.

Andonthesecond.

Johnpope.Findingercondus,findingghos
haus.findingREDquiem,finding1000.100
253

GhostchildinthehouseofRaceanddar

jaqisfall&absence

THELOSTQUARTER

FindingmadMonroe
TherevivalofghostchildinMonroe

Findingercondus
254

Findingmara

Findingjaqi

Tothetower

ALT.SAUL

Therevivalofdeluciainjaqi

(necormagicofElijah)

255

THEWARCYCLE

WARROOMGHOST(THE
FIELD/BUILDING/ROOM)jaqi&mara

WARHALLSON(OBESES)+11VIRGINS
UNBUILTION(MONROE,RACE&DAR,Albu&
chung)

WARHAUS-FAETHER(THE
GENERAL)_DOMINION1000.100saul

Prologue
256

END.

Afterreadingthetableofcontinuation.Enreedgotup,walkedtotheterbanacle,removed
thegunwithaprayerandshothimself.

Therewasbloodonthetarotcards.

257

Marahadjustgottenbacktotheresurrectioncrisismotelandfounda12cardtarotspread
onthedressingtablecoveredinblood,meatandbonefragments.Nexttoitwasa
bloodstainedpieceofpaper.Therewasalistofnamesonit.

Albu
Chung
Ercondus
Enreed
J
ImmanuelGrant
Delucia
Monroe?
Wu
Race
Dar
Pope
Jaqi
Ghoshaus?
Mara

Herbloodfroze.

258

Footnotestoghostbook.
Voltergeist2of7

1. MaraleOrothedestroyer.Surnamegiftedbythedaemonoro

2. JaqiDaniellaalter-mageisDelucia

3. Saulmustbebroughtbacktoexorcizeanddestroythepowerthathaspossessedghos.Ghos
musttheninvokethedaemonOrotooverseethebirthofthedestroyerwhichwillkillthe
general.Withthegeneralgone,thecommandingwarlockcanbewarredwithbySaul.

4. Dedication,

5. Mymythicalaspectisinlovewithyourmythicalaspect.
6. Inourcurrentmanifestations,weappeartohavethisenforceddistancebetweenus.Not
awallbutakindofsocialforcefield.
7. Ourloveisexpressedonlyinthearchetypalworld.ofdreamingandimaginations,of
fictivescenariosandfauxmemory,inpicturesandwords,musicandpoetry.Weplayour
lovegameonacosmicchessboard.Wearealwaystogetherinaparallel-pastlifebeing
readfromthefuture.
8. Weareinloveinanaspectoutsidetime,foritistimethatdividesushere.Iamnot
talkingaboutageforweareimmortalandageplaysnoinfluenceinmattersthatare
eternal.Weloveandareinlovewitheachotherforalltime,forthenumbersandimages
inthecardsaretimeless.Andwearethere,inthearchetypaluniverse,lovingasonly
lovecan,asymbolburningforasigil,asunreflectingthemoonwithmeturninginto
spaceinyourarms.Silentandasleepinendlessstarandnight.

9. evenmadnessmatureslikewine.
259

10. UNSUREOFTHELOSTMASTER,nineSITSOnTHEstairwell,aandwaits.theremustbesomething
happeningusall.maratellsthewaitingmanassheleansagainsttheframeofhermotelroom
door,bloodinherveinsslowlythawingfromtheshockoftheletter.godhelpus,shesaidbefore
shepassedout.Ninecouldnotcatchherintime.Shehitthefloorhard.
11.
12. madnessiseatingninelikealostsheepinafieldofdelirium.Herapesmarainherpassdout
state.shhhhh!helaughsintothebathroommirrorwhenitsover.donttellher.helaughsand
passesoutfinallywhenhisbodycouldnolongertaketheexhaustionandlaughing.Hesmells
slaughteredchickensintheheatedroom.Heweptbeforeblackingout,wipingmarasbodywith
histears.Shecannotseemtowake.Ninefeelshaunted.Terriblyhaunted.\

BOOK 4 obeses,
thedisturbing

260

Iwokeupatnoon,tothesoundofmymother
knockingonthedoor.Iwokeupintimetosee
itopen.Motherhadatiedupgirlcarriedover
herhugeshoulders.Shelumberedin,
hunchbacked,herlopsidedfacegrinningat
me.thegirlwasstrugglingandscreaming
uselesslyintohergag.Iimmediatelyhadan
erection.happybirthdaybabyboy!mother
said,lookwhatmamaboughtforyou!she
turnedtoshowmetheprofileoftheyoung
girl.Herarmswereboundbehindherwith
whiteplasticcabletiesandsowereherlegs.
Shestillhadhersneakersonwhichmademe
harder.Shewaswearingasmall,shortminis
skirtandIcouldseehershapelythighs.Her
topwasaturtleneck,exposinghersoft
creamyneckandslenderarms,strained
andbound.ShewasChinese,andrealpretty
fromthelooksofit.Motheralwaysknewthe
typeofgirlsIliked.Andshealwaysknewhow
togagapoorgirl.Thickblacktapewas
261

wrappedaroundhermouthandhercheeks
werebulgingunderthetension.Mother
alwaysusedherownunwashedpantiesas
mouthstuffing.Iwonderedwithexcitement
howlongshehadusedthepantiesnow
stuffedandsealedinthatpoorgirlsmouth.I
tossedmycomforterasideandadjustedthe
smallwhitegstringpantiesIwaswearing.I
wasalreadybigandhardandmypanties
couldnotcontainme.

hernamesNicoleChiamothersaid,asIclappedmyhands
likeachild.shejustturnedseventeen.Ireachedoutmyhands
toreceivemygift.Motherputherintomyarms,strugglinglike
astraykitten.Shewassosoftandlightandpetite.Immediately
Ismelledhershampoo.Fruityandfresh.Ipulledherstruggling
formuntome,hersmallroundedbumpressinhgdownonmy
crotch.Iburiedmyfaceintoherneckandtookadeepwhiff.So
youngandcleanandsweet.Shescreamedintohergag.Hereyes
werewetfromcryingandwidewithfear.

doyolikeher?motherasks.
shesniiiice.Itellher.Nicoleisweepingandwhimpering.I
squeezeherwithmyfatarms.Imsohappyyoulikeher.you
262

cankeepherforaslongasyouwantandyoucandoanything
youwantwithher.Illleaveyouwithyournewteentoy.You
comeoutandeatwhenyourehungrylaterok?
yesmother.Iwassohappy.Nicolewasmewingwhenmother
closedthedoor.
Butmotheropeneditagain.ohandonemorething.Begentle
withherok?Shesstillavirginmotherchuckledandi
laughedwithher.mytiedupteenvirgingirlstruggledagain
frantically,desperatelytryingtoescapeherownnightmare.

Ilaidheroutstraightonthebedandadjustdhersmallskirt.I
climbedontopofherasshekeptshakingherhead.Irubbedmy
erectionontoherstomach,againstthesoftfabricofhertight
tanktop.Ileanedinandstartedlickinghersoftcreamyneck.
ShekeptwtistingandjerkingherheadawayfrommeandI
keptsucklingandlickingithardereachtimeshedidthat.I
lickedherears,wrigglingitinside,nibblingherearlobes.Her
muffledsquealingturningmeonmore.

Slowly,myrighthandslippedunderhertanktopandItucked
mylefthandintothetopofhertop,scoopingouthersoftround
breastsfromhercottonbracup.Myrighthandsnuckupher
rightbracupandbeganmassagingherrightbreast.Iranmy
thumbsaroundhernipples

263

Mad monroe broke out of the vision with a terrified gasp. Gobules of black water
and oil and dark blood was retched out uncontrollably at the mouth of the open
sewer. The mess flowed into the river Ga that ran next to the sewer. He felt unclean
and bothered. He was visibly shaking from his hallucinations

He tried to orient himself. He felt his clothes thoroughly burnt, leather jacket melted
into his own skin. His hair was all burnt but intact, covered in a kind of black mud as
if the pipe was the sludge wombm giving birth to man that was supposed to be dead
in a fire. He tried getting up but great pains seared through him. A great turbulence
was in his soul. Instinctively, he seeked out his ghost child but she was no where
near him. He stumbled away fromn the rotting opening of the sewer pipe and fell
knees first along the concrete slope that ran along the banks of the river ga.

Echoes of people screaming haunted him and hehad terrible flashbacks of fire. He
saw faces of young girls, ggagged and frightened. Some had their eyes sewn open,
others had their eyes sewn shut. He felt thoghroughly sick but some writhing snake
in his gut kept him struggling up the slopes to somewhere else. His mind recoiled
repeatedly in terror and profane images.
He wasnt sure if his ribs were broken. He wasnt sure if his heart was supposed to
be beating with such irregular violence. His eye sightw as blurred and muddy in the
dark. He could scarcely make out the figure at the top of the slope, trying to reach out
to his blind hand. Elijah! Elijah take my hand thevoice was saying but Elijah was
straining to see. instinctively, he reached out and a strong grip helped him up onto
street level. He collapsed flat out onto the floor, gazing up, his mind far away in pain,
staring at a red rising star.
Elijah can you hear me? I am called nine, are you here? can you focus?
nine.ninewho are
your ghost child told me to save you from thisnight, to bring you back. Doyou
understand me? I dont quite know
ghostchildghost
264

yes. Yes. She appeared in a guests room next door to mine at a motel. She called out
to me. I know of you through my master.who iswho is gone.
speak.. your mastersname..
omandae. Omandae manhatter.
I ..do notknow him.
nevermind. I nee dto get you back into the roomcan you walk?
he helped Elijah up to his feet. Together, they limped to the phantom cab waiting by
the road.

The energies in room 12 stirred when the door was unlocked and Elijah and nine
stumbled in under the weight of a weakening Monroe. Mara stirred from her corner,
knees still drawn up towards her chest, like she was scared or shivering cold.
Monroe immediately sensed the spirit of his ghost c hild. His eyes became more alive
as he s earched the room.

where is she? he asked.

Nine looked a little disturbed as pointed to the last drawer of the dressingtable.

its inthere. The soiledpanties he looked at mara who looked a little dazed
and drugged out. She was naked from the waist down. Mad Monroe got down to his
knees and slowly opened the drawer. Maras white panties was stained yellow with
urine and her own secretions. Mad Monroe picked up the pair of panties andheld it
to his face. He took a deep breath and it bothered nine terribly at the sight of this
gross act. The things in the room started shaking suddenlt as if a small earthquake
had hit the room. do not be afraid Monroe said in a small girls voice. I am
returning. Monroe prostrated himself towards the toilet. do not be afraid of the
dark. Do not be afraid of the voices. She chanted through Monroe. Do not be afraid
of us.

265

Monroe convulsed there andt hen upon the floor. He looked like he was having a fit.
He flopped like a violently dying fish,. Mara screamed. Nine backed away wild eyed,
shocked. Monroe stopped as suddenlya s he started. A few moments of unmoving
ensued, then he started coughing loudly.

whis..key he said between coughs. Mara suddenly got out of her crouching
position and grabbed her half bottle off the table and passed it to Elijah. Monroe
sucked hungrily on it, lettingthe hard whiskey burn down his throat, drowning the
pain and monsters in his stomach. He finishedo ff the entire bottle then let it drop
from his hands as he stood up, an abosolute unstably intoxicated. he drinks toe asset
he pain ofhis curse. Nine found himself explaining to mara. he has become himself
again. He and his ghost child are united. Monroe struggled out of his soiled clothes
with mara helping him.. she was scared of his scars and burnt off skin. He stumbled
bloodied and naked into the shower and drowned out his own inner pain with a
primal pain as he let scalding water wash off the mud and blood from his battered
body.

The whole room was steaming and looked like a fog of heat had suffocated the room.
Mara opened the windows she watched the naked Monroe breathe steadily and
calmly, passed out with half his body sticking out of the bathroom. Nine was
smoking whatever was left of maras cigarettes. he will help us find Jaqi. Nine said
to mara. When we find her, well be able to do something about everything that has
happened.

Both of them had not touched the table with the tarot cards covered in the blood of
Enreed. Both of them were not really over the shocks of the countless deaths
described by nine from his transcripts of the hallucinations of omandae.

Monroes cough broke the silence. He sputtered like an engine coming back to life.
Nine went on to pass him the robe left behind by his now missing master. Monroe
sat upon the bed. can you remember what happened? nine asked him.

He thought about it. there was a fire.
266


yes. An attack on the house of wu.

Elijahs memory came back in fragmentary forms. A new series of panic rose as he
remembered the terrified girls.

many of your alliances were killed. Nine said apologetically. theres a list. Mara
continued, handing it to Monroe. He read the names, alarmed at the realization of it
all. somehow he felt their deaths one by one and it disturbed ihim more. They were
very unnatural ways to die. He sensed towering things moving beneath the watery
graves of the subconscious. He felt foreign things beneath the waves of existence.

who are you nine, and why are you not dead?

I serve my master omandae. I am a ghostwriter. My task was to documentn the
channeling of my master. I have transcribed every incident hat has transpired up till
the moment of my masters disappearance. I learntof you, of mara, the ghost child and
most of the people on that list through my masters channeling. I have seen what had
happened through my masters eyes and now, we are the ones that are left to bring
about a resolution to all of this. We have to find maras friend jaqi. She holds one of
the keys that wouldget us through towards the end of dire November. We need you
to help us find her.

PSALMS OF SAUL #693

there were too many voices in the head. To many personalities emerged. The team
became a crowd. The core was lost in that crowd. In that loss came the rupture, giving
birth to 1000.100.

267

it is said that the transitioning period was manifested as the one thousand. It was the
hall of madness. It was twilights walk, the dark night of the soul. They said that
those who touched it became consumed by it. And over time, they became it and the
one thousand would become bigger.


Key questions of dockter Elishias seigh on the epitome of the one thousand one
hundred consciousness.

When did we discover the presence of this illness of the mind? Why is this fractured and
senseless and scattered?



While the psychotic obeses raped Nicole, she was having terrifying images of The
Bloated Man. It was written that she had to be haunted first. To be ravished and
stripped of hope and life, before she could have it. It was her nightmare that fed the
machine for its march towards its own death.



11 female teenagers missing in six days. Fates
unknown. Serial rapist and murderer known
as obeses still at large.

268



The angelic orders stood guard over the 29 graves set in the garden of the keeper. An
avenging spirit conserves its powers in a watchtower overlooking the garden. The
gardens keeper is still inscribing symbols and sigils unto the sand, one over the
other. He has been entranced in this manner for the last few hours. The sun is
eternally setting here at the garden. There is always more space for graves at the
garden.


As Aira nurtured the last of his wounds, Saul said to her, this may be the last time
you see me. the naked girl with white skin nodded, flaked skin falling off her cheek
like slow snow. She knew this time would come. Her waters had told her. She
understood.

Ill have to snuff the rooster.

She let his drift in the water, having done with his legs. She watched him drift,
naked and soundless in her ocean. The tide of time would now bring saul back
through the spaces of his own memory.


The continuum of Vault m

Bronze age of the jungles. /follow the irab flag/ locostation is a druq. /cocker spaniel
seeds/ gaia. Illogicity was the nexus. The house od daeken, the first lore is at its
surrealistic peak.
269


Daeken has beheaded himself.

Accomplished through a self-posessed jester.
Saul is to drink from the open skull of daeken. to gain the knowledge of your
ancestors. Saul remembers.

He drinks form the head of his shamanic self. It takes him back to the origins. He
takes him to another place for this place is no longer his.

The metro. Glass city circa 1989

There are helicopters above. Raining debris and blood. The blade of the choppers are
slow. The captain is deaf (ear drums blown), about to die from multiple wounds. He
cannot longer move his body, only his head to look at his lover.

She is screaming and crying behind the swat shields covering them from enemy gun
fire. They are trying to reach the captain but cannot.

He knows it had come to this. That the hour of his death would be most critical for
the situation in the city.

The authorities are outnumbered. Mass weapons are being stolen. Masses will die by
the conquerors hand.

He knows it must come to this.

270

He sees the old man and the lantern standing at the top of a building. Theold man
raises his lantern to his direction. The third promise will now be fulfilled. The
oldman said to the captain in his mind.

Theo ldman leaps from the building. Thelantern falls with him head first.

The captain closes his eyes in the moment of mercy.

The old man hits and the white explosion occurs.

The enemy has been vanquished.

Traded for the body and soul of the captain whose life ended there in that sector of
time, and whose next life began, another place/ another time.



THE WESTERN LANDS. CIRCA 1817

The army of about 30 knights aurrounded the church and watched it burn. Inside,
Nicholas de ponte kneels before his Lords altar, holding up himself with a battered
sword covered in blood. thehour is athand my lord. He whispers under his breath.
be ourlight in this darkness.

His men were only three. Shaken, weak, afraid in their last hours but still prepared to
war. They held their swoards against the battering on the door. They use their broken
shields to block falling bricks and fire from a roof now burning down. They still
watched overt he body of their queen on the marble slab. Nicholas bows before the
271

body of his lover. your form will not be descrated he vowed to her in spirit. I will
become a monster to keep your divinity at peace.

The doors were almost down. Those who declared the occupants of this church
heretics would tear the door down.

by the grace of your red right hand, my Lord. Nicholas said concluding his prayer
before the war. show our enemy thine vengeance!

the door broke down and the knights charged in.

the blade of de ponte found its targets. His howl of war rose hell in the church. The
roof fell in but the body of the queen was still sheltered by scarce remains of shields.
Great wings descended from above as the now prince nicholAs du ponte invoked the
holy terrors.

The birds of prey took their feast.

Claws without mercy tore through armour, hordes of black screaming clouds sunk
down to consume the enemy.

The red sun eclipsed as the last of the enemy was slain.

The great wings departed and night was at hand.

Nicholas touched the face of his dead over, unblemished by the horrors of the attack.
He prayed overt he last three of his men as he buried them. And in the heart of the
272

burnt down church, He entombed his wife below wheret he earth shall keep her and
the angels of war guards her with their flaming swords/



He is required to move on, for this is not his resting place.

ThelettersweretheonlythingsbelongingtojaqithatMarahadowned.Monroeneededanobject
whichjaqihadtouchedbeforeorsomethingshecreatedsothathecouldtrytracingherintheenergy
realms.Someofthelettersweremorethanayearoldbutithadtodoeventhoughjaqisenergiesmay
havechangedsincethen.Hermorerecentletterswerefeweralthoughmuchfresherinenergy.He
gatheredthelettersinapile,runninginchronologocialorder.Hemeditateduponthem,studyingher
handwriting,thestrokeofherletters,thefeelofthepaperbetweenhisfingers.Maragavehimsome
picturesofher,sometakenoffphotoshootsforhermodelingjob.SomethingwrithedinMonroewhen
hestudiedherbeautyandform.Shewasexoticyetsimple.Sheheldmuchpowerinhergaze.Hefeltout
forthepicture,triedtoshapeherpsycheaccordingtohisinstincts.Heke[twhisperinghername
underhisbreath,whichscaredmaraalittle.jaqiDanielle.jaqiDanielle.jaqiDaniellehewalked
aroundslowlyinasmallcircle,sti;lthumbingtheletterswithonehandashedughispocketforthe
bottleofblacksandthatwasalwayswithhim.Hecontinuedwalkinginthatcircleandwasmarkingitby
pouringouttheblacksandlittlebylittle.
273

lavooshna,alva.Hechanted
lavooshna,elmar
maraandninebothcouldfeelaslightdisturbanceintheroom.Thefigureofhisghostchildstarted
forminginthecircle.Clingingtohislegslikeachildwould.Ithadonetheblackpvcsuit,thegasmask
toobigforachildshead..
organicsnakeliketubeswereextendingfromthemaskanditsnakedintheair.Theghostthingtook
holdoftheletterslikeachildgrabbingatoyshewanted.thetubestracedtheinkonthenewestletter.
Thenthechildunzippedhersuitandslippedthelastletterdownhercrotch.Maracouldnotlook.the
thinglookedlikeitwasmasturbatingitselfwiththeletter.Monroeputhishandonthegasmask,closed
hiseyes.Itlookedlikethetubesstruckhishands,bithimandbegansuckingbloodfromit.Hismouth
openedinsecretecstacyastheghostchildrubbedherselfharderandmoreviolently.Monroesarms
werevisiblyshaking.

amiscarriage.Hesaid.hisvoicetrembling.Hesawbloodinhismindonsomeoneelsesfloor.Blood
startingdrippingdownfromtheexposedflatchestoftheghostchild,fromwherehernipplesare
supposedtobe.Thebloodcrepttowardshercrotchwithalifeofitsown.Itfounditselfbackupinside
her.thebloodfromhernipplesreturnedtothebodythroughhercrotch.Theconncetionwasmade.

Monroeletgoofthechildsheadandfellbackwardslikebeingslained.Hehitthefloorgently,convulsing
slightlyinecstacy.Hesawimmediatelythetasksahead.Thelocationofmara,thesymbolofthewar
cycle.Hecrawledlikeapossessedcreaturetowardsmaraandine,grabbingbothofthemwitihhisarms.
Marascreamed,ninetriedtobackawaybuttheywerebothhitwiththevisions.Ninesawhispathand
marasawhers.

Thevisionsvanishedfromthem,andMonroeletthemgo,fallingagaintotheground.Theghostchild
haddisappeared.Anotherlightwasreturningtoroom12.

thetehatredistrict.Elijahsaidwearily.thatiswhereJaqiis.

274

94

itwasaneonglowtoystorewithpsychedelictoys.Lightsrichanddeepanddark,alivewithglowinthe
darkblood.Theownerworeatophayoutlineinagreenneonglow.Hiseyesglowedpurple,thelight
fromhismouthwaspink.Itspoekwithoutsenseorjuudgement.theflyingfish,prehistoria,findsthe
roosterfattenedfortheslaughter.
Thetoysdancearounditsmaster.

93

OLGERDONOFOHOLIVES!
OLGERDONTHEEPICWORM
BIRTHEDINTHEBOWELSITEATSTHROUGHDEADUNIVERSE
FILLSITSHIDEOSFORMWITHCOLDEARTH
OLGERDONLIVESINTHEAGEOFTHEDEAD!

THESOILISSUBTLEWITHDEADTHINGS
BURIEDCITIESOFUNDEREARTH
AWAITINGTHERAISINGOFTHEDEAD!

92

P@UL_PFRICTIONPRESENTS

ECRA&ARD
275

SECONDRANGEANTHOLOGEISTS.

Thereisanewwavetobornebytheendofdirenovemeber.Thereisrecorded,thedeathofthelastage.
Respectsarebeingpayedtothebombedoutbuildingofoneweeddjango.Theformerpublisher,being
thelastviablecontactwiththeouthermyths,hasnowseveredtieswiththatbodyofknowledge
followinghisuntimelydeath.

We,thesecondrangeantholgeist,isherebygiventotasktobringforththenewwave.Thisbeginswith
thefirstchanneler,OMANDAEMANHATTERandhisscribe-servantNINE.

Nocurrentbodyofworkiscurrentlypublishedbutafirstvolumeoffivebooksisknowntobein
development.
Furtherupdateswillbepublishedinduecourse.

Thecurrentwhereaboutsofomandaemanhatterandhisservant,nineareunknownatthetimeofthis
notice.
PersonswithinformationshouldcontactECRA&ARDviapersonalvisitto211ATONDISTRICTSTREET.
Allidentitiesofforthcomingpersonswillbeheldinstrictestconfidence.

ISHJADETHEATER

Jaqihaslostherselfinastagecharacter.Sheportraysatroubledyouthpoet,scarilyreflectingthelifeof
mara.Intheend,Hercharacterhangsherselfinthelibraryonherownbirthday.Shewasstudyingher
lineswhenMaraandninecameuptoher.Monroewaswaitinginthecarforthem.

jaqi?
276

shelookedupbutmaraknewshewassomeoneelse.

doyounotknowtheexhaustionofthissoul?
Whohadlaboredlongandhardtocomewiththosewords
Trhosefewsmallmeaninglesswordsthattrytoenscribetheyearningsofmyheart?
DoyounotknowhowtiredIamofthislife?Howsolittlewordscanbringmorevaluetoit?

jaqi.Itsmara.Comeon
doyouknownotofthesadnessthatbequellsme?
doyounotknowIamhurtingindeepforbiddenplaces?
delucia!ninetried.
Shestoppedtalkingandstaredathimwithlosteyes.
rememberdelucia.HetoldJaqi.
doyounotknowthatsheisdead?shewhisperedback.
sheisimmortal,ninetoldher,shecannotdie.
manyhavebeenwrongbeforeshezonedout,aboutimmortality.Shewascoldanddetatched.
Maraheldherhands.Itwascoldandclammy.
comewithus,maratoldher,shewasntsureifshewasgettingthrough.Itsaddenedhertoseejaqi
likethis.Shewasalwayssoanimatedinherphoneconversationsandinherletters.Somethinginside
herhaddied.Shehadtohelpbringdeluciaback.
Ninehadexplainedwhathelearntfromomandaeaboutalter-mages.Howonepersonlivingoonthis
earthexistencecouldalsohaveaparallelselflivinginanotherdimension,doingverydifferentthings
fromtheselfhere.Somehowthetwoselveswouldbelinkedforifsomethinghappenedtooneselftheo
tehrselfwouldbeaffectedbeitemotionallympsychicallyorarchetypically.Iftheotherselfwasdead,
theonlywaytobringthatselfbackwasthroughtheperformingofalter-magenecromagic.Something
Monroewascursedtodo.

277

NinethendecidedthebestwaytobringJaqialongwithoutneedingtoconvinceher.

Hepunchedherout.Withmuchapologiestomaraabouthittingwomen.

Whenhecarriedtheunconsciousjaqiacrosshisshoulders,maraflashbackedtotheimageofNicole,
beingcarriedbythementhroughtheholeinthewall.

Ninebrokeherthoughtswhenhesaid,now,weheadtothetower.

SATELLITEAI-FILOG:2801102007
STATUS:REACTIVATION.
PRINCIPLESOURCE:SAULLIERA
MISSIONSTATUS:RE-CONNECTION.
FIRSTLINEREQUESTCODE:CYCLES02UPDATE:

UPDATINGINPROGRESS..

LISTTIMELINE?Y

1. THE RED EVENT



2. THE APPEARANCE OF NINE AND OMANDAE

3. THE RECOVERY OF THE HOUSES.

278

4. THE LOSS OF DRASHAD AND MARIAN.

5. LOST PERIOD.

6. END OF LIST.

7. AWAITING COMMAND CODES.

.



..
COMMAND LINE: /INITIATE INTERFACE. /

INITIALIZINGAI-FIINTERFACE.

_____--____---__

AI-FIINTERFACEINITIALIZED.

INPUTDATA:

COMMANDLINE:DEFINE/LOSTPERIOD/

PROCESSING.

279

UNABLE TO COMPLY.

COMMAND LINE: /LOCATION INDICATORS <SUB> MARIAN , >SUB?
DRASHAD

PROCESSING..

UNABLE TO COMPLY

COOMMAND LINE: ,RUN/ / TIMELINE FRAGMENTATION SEARCH/ *LEVEL*
OMEGA ZANAR

PROCESSING

..

..
1. THE ATTEMPTED ARRIVAL OF JACOB LORE

2. THE BURDEN OF MAD MONROE

3. THE FORMATION OF ORDOM

4. THE ARRIVAL OF THE WOMAN OF THE NEW MOON

280

5. THE PREPERATORY YEAR OF NINE AND OMANDAE

6. THE CHANNELING OF OMANDAE

7. THE RUPTURE OF 1000.100

8. THE ARRIVAL OF THE GENERAL.

9. THE DEATHS IN THE FIELD

10. THE BIRTH OF THE ZEITGEIST.

11. THE ATTACK ON THE HOUSE OF WU

12. FEATURED DEATHS.

END OF LIST

COMMAND LINE: MAP TRAJECTORIES >CYCLES02UPDATE<> / TIMELINE
FRAGMENTATION SEARCH/ *LEVEL* OMEGA ZANAR


PROCESSING

//

//

281

//
MAPPING COMPLETE.

UPLOAD ? Y

UPLOADING..

UPLOAD COMPLETE

COMMANDLINE: |EXIT|

AI-FI LOG END:


Like a star the satellite/plaent ai-fi ascends. For those who study both the sky and
soul will witness it and shall understand. It had watched once. During the lost period
it had watched. The next powers had granted it sight. But all magic has a price and at
the end of its era, the satellite ai-fi ended and its memory taken back. It knows of
everything after. It knows of everything before. But not of the lost period.



When Jaqi came to, she was naked.

Hot wax was being poured on her skin by a man in a gas mask. She woke up
stimulated and erotic and highly sexual. A small girl in a full body harness crawled
282

on top of the naked jaqi. Rough belted leather against soft wet skin. Jaqi gasped as
the manin the gas mask worked his death magick. Hands conducting unheard
symphonies. Thegirl rubbed her faceless head into jaqis neck. Tubes snaked across
her cheeks. Sucking softly on her skin, taking in the body heat of jaqi. delucia come
the man said, va la ushna vin oro
Vara lushna von daeken
Va ra ishna van saul
Delucia, come.
Jaqi orgasmed in the blackened room.

Outside in thehall of the tower, nine and mara waited on black sofas. The energies in
the t ower of 71 was changing. They could sense the returning tide of the shores of
Afrioca.

This is sauls tower. His place of power when he was still here. This place has the
strongest memory of saul and through this place, nine hoped that Elijah would bring
delucia back so she could bring saul home.


Without him, there was no other power great enough to war with the dark night of
one thousand one hundred and the absurdist killer it had spawned.

They heard jaqi crying out in ecstacy. Mara looked at nine and wanted to make love
to him. Their thoughts were mingled with the post-dread atmosphere of the door of
death opening and closing, allowing delucia to return.

The noise in the room stopped.

283

The door opened and the two of them looked up.

Jaqi emerged, fatgue consuming most of her strength. But she gathered anough of it
to call out maras name.

Tears of joy came to their eyes as they embraced.

I could hear Monroe vomiting in the background.



A sociopathic wizard had escaped from the magickal halls of 1000.100. he calls
himself the general. With his dark powers now escaped to earth, he forms The family.
The hunch back mother and the deranged obeses. The general spends the powers
feeding them, nurturing them for the horrors they would inflict in the name of
graheg. In the dark under tunnels he dwells. Feeding upon the dog corpses and the
sludge of human waste. His fever and madness grows as his powers grow beneath
the city of compulsive sin and technology.

by the ular of grhg
I spawn flesh and blood
Undead animated
Picking off the chosen
Eleven virgins
For the hall of gr;hg
For 11 turns of events
The dark hand shall triumph
284

As it desecrates the flesh of the youngest
By the altar of grhg
The puppets will kill
Partaking in the pleasures of ravaging
Innocence borne to such a beautiful fate

MONROE jerked out of his sofa from sleep, and vomited onto the glass table. Nine
woke up at he sound of retching and was alarmed. whoa, whoa brother

DONT TOUCH ME! DONT TOUCH ME! his eyes was like a man possessed

the door to the masterbed room flung opened and mari and jaqi came out, their
naked bodies wrapped in the single black comforter. whats going..? oh god
Monroe.. she stared at him vomiting. It was black and horrible and thick and
spreading faster around the house than it should. Nine was panicking. what should
we do? What should we.. he became sick and wanted to vomit. The great energies
of the house shifted so quickly, even mari and jaqi started feeling very sick.

Something bad was happening.

EEEAARRRRCCCGHHH!! a terrible scream tore from SAULS room. The room
empowered by the inscriptions of return written in the hand of delucia. The room
charged with the ill and holy magic of eor/nom as cast by Monroe.
The room designed with desperation and alt.learning to lead saul back.

There was a loud bang on sauls door.

285

Another bang.

Something large wanted to come out.

They heard growling coming from the room.

Jaqi stared out with wet delucias eyes, saul?






BOOK 5
286

Phase I Saul, the returned

myhandstinks!saidthelittlegirlinthebluedress.
Saullaughedather.theressomethingwrongwithyournose.Itschocolate.
theresaterriblepunchlinetothisjokeisthere?sheretirted,shakingherhands
violentlyawayfromher,hopingitwouldgetridofthemuddysmellythingsonher
hands.Shehadpickeduponeofsaulscardsanditturnedintoturd.
therewouldbeshitonyourhandsyoungone.Hehadsaidtoherbeforelaughingat
thechild.
youllpayforthisunclesaul!
helaughedsomemore.IthinkIvepaidquiteabit.Youshouldallowmemyhorrible
jokes.
yuarecrazyunclesaul!
madderthanthosewhotriedtofindme.hetoldher.
shefinallygotridofallthemudandsighed.Shewassittingonablueglasstea-tableset
inthemiddleofaspringcountryside,underabogoaktreeshelteringherfromthe
youthfulsunofyesteryear.
youregoingtoleavemeagainarentyou?shefinallysaid.asadnessinhervoice.Saul
triednottolethissmilefadeaway.
Iwillseeyuagain.Hereassuredher.
shestartedcryingalittle.

aw,comeonhoney.Hesaid.Iwontbegoneforlong
287

youweregonefortwoyearsuncle!Thenyoucamebackawhileandnowyoumustgo
again.
iitwonttakesolongthistime.Ipromise.Illseeyouatleastonceeveryyear,ifnot
more.
onceayear?!shewasthrowingatantrumnow.
ok.Twice.Saulsaidhurriedly.Playfully.Asifarguingoveralittlejoke.
Hepokedthecheekofherpoutingfacewithhisfinger.
Illmissyou.shesaid.stillpouting.
Illmissyoutoo.hesaid,kissingheronherforehead,thenhuggingher.
sheclosedhereyes.Felthisgreatwarmthoflovefillhertillshewassocomfortableand
atrestthatshefeelasleep,deeply,backintoherownbed.Theflowersandhillsandsun
wentawayinhermind.Thebigoldtreeandthehcinacupsontheblueteatable
vanishedfromhermemorybutinherheart,Saulremained.Shewenttosleepagain
soundly,tellingherselfshellsavemissinghimfortomorrow.Now,shehadthelast
memoryofhiminherlittleheart,biddinghimasafejourneytowhereverhewasgoing
andthatwasenoughtogivehersleepmuchpeace.

__

shesanawfullysweetgirlisntshe?thekeepersaidtosaul,astheywatchedher
asleepinthebigwhitebedouttherenexttotheothergraves.
IthinkIllneverforgether.hesaid.
youneverforgetanyofthem.Thekeeperreplied,turningawaytoreturntohishall.
Ashewalkedoffhesaid,wheneveryouareready.Firstson.
HeletSaulstandoutthere.Watchinghislittledarlingbecauseheknewhealways
neededtosavorthatlastlook,thatlastkiss,thatlasthandfulofsandasheburiedallthe
loveshehadbefore.Butthistime,thekeeperallowedhimtolingereventhoughshell
alwaysbethere,unburied,aliveandeternallychildlikeinhersleepofinnocence,here
inthegarden,becauseeventhoughtheothersmeantmoretohimindeaththaninlife,
shewastheonewhowasdifferent.
288

.
whenSualhadbidhislastgoodbyestothegirlhesavedthreeyearsago,thegirlwhom
hehelpedcrossoverafterfinaldaysofanearthfrombefore,hebeganhiswalktowards
thehallofthekeeper.Thathutoffinalstation.Thelasthousebeforehereturnedtothe
landofsandandsoil.Theplacecalledtheglasscity.This,isthetempleofresurrection/

Saulreachedthegreatdooranduponitwasthesigilofthekeeper.

Belowitaninscription.

enterye,only
thebearerofthisname.

belowtheinscriptionisthesigilofsaul.

Belowthat,anotherinscription.

onlythemastermayreturntothemastershouse.

Saulpushedthedoorsopen.

Theaisleleadingupthealtarwasalong.

Therewerefourteengirls,aged11standingeachononesideformingalineofseven.

289

Thetwelfthgirlwasattheheadofthealtar.Shewasthealter-mageofthekeeper.

Shestoodthereinacloak/robeshrunkdowntohersize.Thesamegarmentthekeeper
hason.inscribedbyalieninscriptionsfromthewordofbeforeandthewordofafter.
Eachwordheldpowerofcountlessworldsandtheirrespectivemagickaltraditions
withmemory,thehistoryoftheothercirclesareitsseeds.Itisonlylifeimmortalthat
nourishesit.

Thegirlattheheadofthealtarspoke

nakednessistheprimalstate.Thelossofallself-consciousnessthatbirthsforththe
consciousstateofall,theeverlasting.

Loseyourgarments,masterSaul.

Hebeganstripping,realizingthatofhiscurrentform.

Hewasbaldandbloated.Uponhisheadborethesymbolsoftheredpyramid,the
symbolofvault-mandthemarkofonethousandonehundred.

Hehadnomoregroin,buthehadthickhairgrowingfromit.pubichairbeingthesign
ofspiritualperceptionthroughtheinstrumentalwillofthemagicianinthe
undercurrentrealmsofconsciousness.

The11yearoldflowergirlsintheirwhitedressescameforth,passedsoilandarranged
themselvesinaformationwherethreegirlshelduphistrailingpublichairfromeach
sidewhiletheseventhgirlheldtheendofit.

comeforth,masterSaulsaidthetwelthgirl.Hebeganwalkingtowardsthealtar.
290

thisisyourriteofpassage,shecontinued.thepathwherethepastpresentsthe
powersforthefuture.Thesevengirlsbeforehimhadbecomenaked.Theirbreastsnot
yetform,theirpubichairnotgrown.Theyallhadpaintedgeishafaces.Theirskin,white
assnow.Threestoodoneachsideandtheseventhstoodaheadofthemfacingsaulashe
approachedher.shepatspermuntothefloorsaying,donotswallow.Theglobof
spermsnakedtowardssaulthenescapedunderhisbigtoenail.

The12
th
girlexclaimed,beginyourprofessionofyourarcane.

Whenthefirstvolumeofspermcreptentirelyintohisbody,hebeganhisprofession.

Ofthefirstdraft
inthegarden
bethebirthofthismyth
bytheriverofwrit
theyounghandbegins
theactofthefirstbournemyth
ofhekeeper
fatherofmemories
sourceofpowerdrawnfrometernalthemes
loveandloss
destructionandforgetting
deathandrebirth
thusbeingthefoundation
thecyclesthatwouldinform
theevolutionofsaul.
291

Thesecondnakedgeishagirlspatspermuntohisleftleg.donotswallowItateinto
hisskin.
Enteringbloodstream.

ofthesecondlife
ofmessianicdelusion
andtheleadingofthedevout
intohefieldsofmassacre
thehandofjudgementdeclares
thefirstandforemostcurse
thebloodonthehandsofsaul
willpoisonhisbeingintoanotherform
offleshandboneandweakness
andofalifewithbattleandpainanddeath.

Thethirdnakedchildspatspermuntohisrightfeet.
donotswallow.

Andthesludgeofthespermateintohislife.

thechildofadventure
discoversthesight
giftedbythehermitandhiswhitel;antern
giftedwiththeknowledgeofthelossofothers
292

ofknowingofthelost.
Thussavingroyalty
Thusformingthehouseofsalvation
Andwithallsalvation
Comestheviolenceandtheblood
(Crucifixtion/passion/thorns
andthewarbegins.ofhumanbondageandvioelce
ofweaponsdestroyingenemies
fleshandbonetorn
withmachinesoflovingwar
andwithitcametheprice
oflosingbrothersandloves
sacrificeduntothealtarofannihilation
amdonebyonetheirgravesarefilled
withflowersthatwontbringthemback
andthepainoflosseatsawaythesoulofsaul
formingvibeswhererevengeisthepathtothegardenofdeath
andselfsacrificetheonlysalvation
prmosisedbythemanwholightstheway

upthewatchtowerwhereacrossthehorizons
theenemyisvanquishedinaflash.thefourthnakedgirlspitsuntohisstomach
throughdigestion,evolutionishastened
andthedeadmanofgirlthree
isresurrectedbythehandofillogicity
293

andfromitthefirstLoreisborne.
Andthemagicofthislunaticplace
Theseeminglyseedofthefuturemadness/arcana
Bearingtheuniverseonethousandonehundred
Isknowledgepassedonbyitsshaman-king
Thefeared,golfumbrellasorcererofvault-m.

Thefifthgirlspitsuponhisleftnipple.donotswallow.
Theeatinghurtshimandhestallshiswalktothealtar(thatseemstochangein
distance)buthestrugglesonastheconsciousacidicspermeatsintohischest.

thevaultofmisended
intheflashofresolutebombruns
apocalypsedevourscontinuumM.
reducedtoaclusterofstars
thenfissionedandnebulaein
intoapowersource
constructingandwomblikebuilding
oftheplanet/satelliteai-fi.
Thusjourneyingforththistemplemagickaltech
Becomingtransmissionandreceiver
channlesforthedivinityofNBLR
Downloadingthemythsoftheoutherspace.
Thusseeded,thenuclearsbirth
Theageofthehfirsthouses
294

Ofihiirandcirqu
Oftheouthersandthesatellitefamilies
Ofthelostperiodsetbefore
thecosmicterror
OfTHEREDIDOL

Thesixthgirlspatuntohisrightnipple...donotswallow.

Thespermwasblodied,crimsonslime.
Itfriedhisnippleagainsthiscontrolledurgetoscreaminpain
Itdevouredhimwithoutmercy
Acidonskin
Razortoothslugsonbareflesh.
Thepainturnedyellow
(preparationtoSTOP)
thenthepainturnedred
thetrinityrisinginthewildnoiseoftorment
intheredpoolofredlavarose
thealternativelordohretributionalhordes
Oftheredwarlock
Primal/futuremessiah
TheREDCHRIST.
Andhismarkisofkarmarepaid
Thedivineactofretribution(sowingtheseedsofillactions)
295

The,hadarrivd
Theelectricfuturespiritofredretribution
Theunknownneonzeitgeistofintervention
ThebeingthatiscalledTHEREDMAN

Thenthelastofthetrinityrose
LikethebubblingwasteofblackOphelia
SAULhaththusbecometheblack
Theu8nconsumedandallconsuming.

Thelastgirlspatrightintohischest
Andthegreyspermburnedintohisheart
Andtheheart,throughitscrimsonrivers
Ledthebloodofmad1000deepintothepsycheofhe
Whobearsthe100fragmentsoftheselfofsaul.

iamthemothervoice
thehall1000
thesign/book/house
thehallthatisofshiftingdoors
thedoorsthatopentoahundredgates
gatesthatspreadintoahundredrooms
296

ahundredhours
ahundredpages
a100voices.
Iammotherofthegod1000
Thegoddestvvoiceoftransitionalmadness
Theerathatfollowsinthewakeofai-fi
Thecyclethroughwhichthenextkingdomismade
Iamthemothervoice
Whocraftedthethousandthmagic
Whohousedthehundredadepts
Thewombthatbirthsthenext.

Andsaulreachesthetwelfthgirl.
Theprofessionofstatesmadewhole
Shegentlytoucheshisface.
yourreturningiscloseathandshesaid.

thesacramentsawait.

The12
th
childnolongerbareshernakedness.
Shechooses,ashesymbolofidentity,abluedress.
Hereyesglowblue.
Nolongerthegirlwhoknowssaul.
Nolongerthesaulsheknew.Theydonotremembereachotherinthisrealm
Sheisthe12
th
whostandsbeforethealtarofsacramentaltransformation.
297

Theconsumptionact
Systemizedasritualandtransmutations.
Thisisthemedicinesofmetamorphosis.

Shestepsaside.

tobewhatyouconsume
isthefirstactofbecoming.

Therearethreeredcirclesontheblackmarbletable.
Ineachcircle,anitemofalienpower.

ThefirstisThegoldencan.
Itisopenedandrunningaroundthesilverstoparebabyblackants
Theyarewildandfastandfrantic
Butorderedandefficientandtireless.
Theyrushintothecan.
Chaoswithdirection
Ahundredsoulsintotheblackhole.

Saultakesthecan
(likethebloodofChristintheholygrail)
heconsumesthegoldenfluid
(theurineofthegoddessherluciendaoath)
theliquidfloodshisveins
298

withoathsandvowsandpromisesnevertobebroken.

The12
th
girlspeaks.

astheteacherteaches
thestudentlearns
asthestudentteaches
theteacherlearns
thepowerofthemagicgrows
asthebeliefofitspeopleshares

inthesecondcircle,halfanorangepillliesinitscentre.

Thegirlinthebluedressspeaks:

placebethegift
ofvoices[in]pharmaceutica
untothetongueofin-vocations
ofnameschosencast
uponthewallofhouseonethousand
whereeachnamedbe
designedindecorum
followedaccordingtolaws
governedbythehandofNbLR
formedbytheeverchanging
299

sourcedinthesunofLORE
byguardandguidoflights
glowingorangelikeastarofnight
bethekeyintheseaofcosma
toopendoorsuntoinfinita

tothefinalcirclelaythefinalseed
wherethespermofsurrealismmeetstheeggofevolution
theblackflowersofthefourmoonedwasteland
sunyatianspace
theterbanacleoftheelderascetics.

AndThusthelastgirlspakethethirdandlasttime.

berememberedyouroriginpast
ofpyramidsredandfutureai-fi
ofthejourneyoutofwasteland
intopostonethousandandbeyond.
Bethisyourfinalchapter
Theconsumingofthatwhichwilldie
Whosefunerealshallmarkthestart
Ofthelifeafterorlific,thewake.

Saulconsumesthefinalsacrament.

300

itiscompleted.Saidthekeeper,nowreturningtohisfinalform.

Bythemythopoeicalchemyofsaul,thethreesacramentsbegintomerge.
Ahundredvoicesbegantocoagulate
Thethousandthmemorybecamenucleus
Andallothermemoriesofsaul
Fromallhismultitudinalforms
Fromhisimortallictimelinesandcontinuums
Begantotakeshapelikeagaianorganism
Thecontinentsandoceansandwastelandsanddesertsandjunglesandforests
Fusingincreationofagestaltworld.theworldinturndesigntheorbitsfromwhichthe
universewouldrevolve
Andthus,theactofcreation,recallingitself
Comesintototalawareness
Intodivinicformationofthegodmind.

Thekeeperpointedtotheblacknessbeyondtheemptytableofsacramentsandsaidto
saulashispartingwords,

throughthecurtainbeyourexit,thelookingglass,themultidoorwhoseunikeyis
named

-)&4+EE= :l


andthethingthatisnolongersaul,stepsthrough.
301

Phase II
-evolution express

Monroewasthefirsttoexperiencethepossession.Thegrowlingatthe
doortosaulsroomhadceased.Thesilencethatfollowedwasunnaturally
deafening.Healreadyknew,instinctively,thatmaraandninewas
enchantedintostatues.Onlyhewasstillaliveinasense.Heknewinhis
cursedguttheexperienceofpossessionandheknewthatthiswasno
ordinaryspirit.Notfromthepantheonsofthenjorreligions.Notfromthe
pantheonsoftheancienttraditions.Noteventhepantheonfromafuture
tradition.Noocculttraditioncouldeverevolveintosomethinglikethis
whichwaspossessinghim.Thispowercamefromanothercontinuum.One
whollyalientothatofthislimitedexistence.anunknownviruslikefeverg
rippedhim,disregardingcompletelythepotentcurselaiduponhim,the
cursethatpreventedtheroosterofabsurdia,thedystopianzeitgeistthat
hadkilledsomanykeyfiguresinthecirclesofthisexistencefromkilling
himbutacursethatcouldnotwarwiththismysteriumpowerchanneled
backintosaulsprivatesanctuaryandplaceofhighpower.

ElijahmadMonroedidnotfightthepossession.Hesurrenderedtoit,
trustingthatitwassomehowboundbythepowersofsaul.Thepowerthat
302

returnedtookhiminstantaneouslyandMonroewasbroughtsomewhere
else.

Theplacewasanelongationoftheprimaldampanddirtybasementofthe
depraved.Theplacesmeltofdankpiss,sperm,sexandblood.Monroe
foundhimselfnakedandbounduntoanironchairwithbarbedwires.The
sharptwistedmetalbitingintohiswristsandanklesandthighsbound
apart.Hisstomachandchesttoowasboundtothebackofthechairwith
themetalthornedwires.Ametalballgagforcedhisjawsopen.Thestraps
wereofbarbedwire,cuttingdeepintohishead.Hiseyeswereforcedopen
withclamps.Thetorturechairwashisthrone.Thethronewaswielded
untoahugemetalcage.Insidethecagewereelevnvirgingirls,limbsbound
toeachothersrandomlytwisteingtheirbodiesaroundeachother.Theyall
hadhugeblackballgagsstrappedtotheirheads.Theywereall,however
gravelysilent.Eyeswideandunblinkingandcold.Theirmoaningwerelike
lowhumsandchantingnoises.

Monroehadhisgroinfiredupwithstimulantsinjectedintohistesticles.He
wasrockhardandhiserectionfilledthemouthoftheoracleofordom.Her
deadbrokenneckedheadhadhertapegagreplacedwitharinggag,forcing
hermouthopentotakeintheerectionofElijah.Shethrustingherheadto
andfro,hereyesstillgluedshut.Shewasmoaningintohim,herslender
slinkybodyarchedlikeacat.Sheworenobraandwasonlycladinalight
bluethongcottonpanties.Herarmswereboundtothebacklegsoftheiron
chair.Somethinggrotesqueandapelikeandpregnantwaspushingthe
cageforward.BeforeMonroewasamurkeypondofblackanddarkgreen
water.Bythelogicofdementiaandhallucination,thepondwassetagainst
abrickwall.Monroefelthimselfabouttocome,thehalfdeadgoddesswas
suckinghimharder.Hefelthisspinefiringup,hisheadswimmingwith
horrorandpowerandfilthandmagic.

303

Heexplodeduntothepondonthewall,gushingviolently.

Thepondrippledindisarrayandascenewasformed.Thisisthedivination
ofeornom.Thescenebecamesemiclear,

Itwasabirdseyeviewofamalepublictoilet.Rundown,abandoned,
unused.Omwasintheheartofanabandonedshoppingcomplexslatedfor
destruction.Awealthyorganizationhadboughttheland.Itownerswere
abouttoengageinblackoccultbusiness.

Thetoilethadelevencubicles.Fiveononesideandfourontheother.

Ineachcubiclesataterrifiedabductedgirl.Someweresquattingoverused
andunflushedbowls.Monroeknewallofthemasvirgins.Hecouldsense
theirpurity,teetheringontheedgeofinnocencebrutallylostbyderanged
pervertedwarlocksallthegirlswereallboundwithplasticties.Theywere
tightlyblindfoldedandgaggedinavarietyofways.Tape.Cloth.Rope.
Leathergagsandblindfolds.Thosewhosatonclosedtoiletseatswerefully
clothed.Someinminiskirts,someinshorts,someinjeans.Thosewhowere
squattingworeonlytheirbrasandsmallpanties.Thescenedriftedoutof
thetoiletandintotheatriumintheheartoftheemptyshoppingmall.
There,thereweretwelevemen,seminakedandgrossandsweatingfrom
theritualdrugtakinganddancing,callingdowntheulargodofrapelust
grhg.Theyworeclownmasksandladiesgstrings.Theyprancedaroundin
darkpossessionchantingthejoysofravishingyoungvirgins.Thescenein
thepoolonthewallmuddledagaintoshowthevariousvacantstoresofthe
complexturnedintoroomsofrappeandtorture.Roomswithcountless
instrumentstoinflictpain,largebedsforlongnightsofrapeandpleasure.
Dressingtablespiledwithdrugsandalcoholofallkinds.Therewasa
sectioninthedepartmentalstorepreservedonthesecondfloor.The
304

lingeriedepartment.Abraandpantyshopforteenagerswasalso
preservedonthefourthfloor.Brightlylitshoppingnexusforthosewho
fanciedthebeautyofbrasandpanties.Theactofchoosingtherightones.
Ofdressinguptheirgirlsinthelittlegarmentsthatturnedthemaniacson
themost,andthealmostspiritualexperienceofslowlyremovingthem
fromweepingterrifiedvirgins.
Thescenereturnedtothatofthegirlsinthetoilet.AndthereMonroefound
hisghostchild.Nakedsaveforthegasmask,enteringthecubiclesoneby
oneandremovingthepantiesfromallthegirls.Thegirlssquirmedand
screamedbutcouldnotseethespiritperformingitsacts.Theguards
outsidethetoiletmasturbatedlustfullytothemuffledscreaming,believing
thatitwastheratsandcockroachesthattheyletloosetocrawluponthe
girlsanddrivingthemintofranticscreaming.Thegimpghostcollectedall
elevenpairsofpanties.Crawleduntothewalllikeaninsectandswap
throughupthepondintothehallwhereMonroewatched.thequeenof
ordom,nowwithherdeadtapegaggedfaceagaindetachedthemetalball
frommonroesmouth,revealingaringgagthatforcedhismouthopen.He
immediatelyunderstoodthenextactofeornommagicpowerednowbythe
strangeforcethatreturnedtosaulsroom.Theghostchildcrawledunto
theboundbodyofMonroethenproceededtostuffthegirlspanties,oneby
oneintohismouth.Onebyone,heswallowedthepanties.Thewhiteand
blueandpinkones.Thegstringsandthongs.Thefloweryonesandlace
ones.Onebyoneheforceditdownhisownthroatsometimeswithtehg
helpofthequeenandtheghostgirlgimp.Asthepantiessliddownhis
throatslowlyandsankintohisstomach,vilevistasofpowerrosewithin
him.Streetsandroadsandbuildingscreptupinhismindlikesubconscious
citiesgrowing.Hesawstreetnamesandgeographicalmarkers.Hefelt
weaknessesandfearandrageanddivinewrath.

Asthelastpairofpantiessankintohisgut,hesawthefacesofhisenemies.
Hesawtheirsouls,transformedintoentitiesofundescribableshapesand
horrors.Thegimptoreoffthetapefromthedeadqueensmouth.The
305

queensatuponhimagain,pushingherpantiesasideandleadinghisstill
erectwanddeepintoher.herdeadrottinglipskissedtheholewherehis
mouthwasforcedopenandwillingandshebeganretchingintohimasshe
kissedhim.Thewarmvileliquidfromhermetamorphosedbodyfilledhim
washingdowntheelevnpairofpantiesinhisstomach.Amadnesssickness
tookoverhim.Asheollikefirelitbydivineembersgrippedhimandinthat
momentofseverity,helearntthetruenamesofhisenemies.

Theonlykeytodestroyingthem
Andthroughtheactofdestruction
Thelivesofelevnvirginswouldthusbesaved.


MARA THE DESTROYER

Did her father touch her in the dark?
Did her lover really kill himself?

Was he killed?

The judge before her, questioning mara was black.
There were rope marks around her neck.
She donned a full judges suit with plastic golden wigs.
A blonde Negroid judge asking mara questions.

306

did you kill those fishes yourself or did God want to show the world, you?

mara could not answer, some kind of strange pinkish glue was creeping out of her mouth and it had
sealed her lips together. The goo was crawling all over her face and her limbs were hard and frozen as
if her muscles were all turning to stone.

why did you go into hiding?

I did not I did not
Was all in her mind but deep inside she knew she did.
She had fled from the world.

was your mother a witch?

oh godoh god

Raped by a demon?

no no no please.

are you a demons daughter?

she tried to recall her mothers face. The pink sludge was filling her eyes, entering her nostrils,
spreading all over her suddenly naked form.

307

bore, bore, that is the named you borrowed, that is not your name is it?

she felt her whle body being encased. It weakened her at the knees. She fell, sideways, cocooned by the
pink gum like substance that was alive.

its not about facing your demons, the judge laughed.

its facing your father.

It was hard for her to see. everything a blur an din pink and cloudy
There was a deafening howl outside her malleable shell.
A howling wind. The outside seemed redder more than pink.
She felt herself rolling, like down a gentle hill.
She hit stones and bricks. It hurt her.
She could not weep or cry out
She could only see the world tumbling outside her .
She felt something move in her gut.
A swirling, sick sensation. Then a voice came.

why do you hate me? a soft gentle mans voice. I returned death to so many who sought it. I saved so
many others for you

Mara was terrified.

Everything she tried blocking away
308

Was breaking through the walls she built.


Idrinking. Gulping down rich beer.
Pills. In digestion.
Head full of smoke and white dust.
Red dust soared through her veins.
Circa ten years back.

Loud desperate rock music
Howling vocals, as if possessed.
Her lover holding on to her tightly, wasted, emotional.
one day, he said. you will be my destruction.
shh..jon. dont get all melodra
youa re destroyer. And I will love you and miss you when Im gone.
jon, shut up. dont think so much. Listen to the howling
you will be the destroyer He cut her off before passing out.

She had taken his words then, as words of a wasted genius musician, and not as a prophecy, that was
meant to be.

She heard violent coughing.

She was no more in the club.
309

She was in his house. Unmoving. Watching from the wall, as if she was a picture, a fly, a lizard on the
ceiling.

She saw jon coughing. Choking.

She saw a man with his back to her gaze. He was in full military regalia.

shoot yourself, The man said. with everything.

White foam was pouring out of jons eyes.
His arms strained and twisted, grabbing a syringe, grabbing the hwole bottle of white liquid.

Mara could see he was fighting it. The man in the military uniform was forcing jon to kill himself.

Jon tried to speak but only white foam came out. Mara then saw the other three empty vials.

Half would already kill a man, Jon had told her of the white bishop, as he called the drug.

Jon just shot up three vials with a fourth on the way.

Hes supposed to be dead.

The military man was raising his left hand over jon , likehe was blessing him.

310

come on jon dont die so quickly. His voice was ice and blunt and dead toned.

The man turned his hand and raised his hand higher, jon arched BACKWARDS.
She heard his spine snap in a few place.

She saw his mouth burst open
But only more whote foam was thrown up, gurgling loudly instead of a scream of pain.

He shott he needle straight into his heart and plunged the full syringe deep into it.
The military man was concentrating on keeping jon alive.

His body was so taut it looked like his veins and muscles might burst from the tension.

He strained and was trapped in that moment of drastic pain and severe toxic poisoning until suddenly
Something gave way.

The noise from his throat stopped
And he fell like a ragged doll face down into a pool of his own vomit.

The military man dropped his hand, then slumped his shoulders, as if sad again that his game was over.

oh well.. he said to the dead twisted body, thirty eight minutes isnt so bad Jon boy.

311

The military man saluted the corpse then walked out of the bathroom as Mara, from the future, gazed ,
shocked, torn, void, at the body of her lover, killed, by the man in the military uniform.

The pink guck flooded her mouth an dthroat, not allowing her to scream throughtout her entire
witnessing. A broiling, hysterical woman unable to express such emotions. Mummified, unable to
breathe yet still living.

She felt herself roll up the rocky hill.

Rocks hit her head, her knees. A fetal like pink stone rolling up a grey/red mountain, against all manner
of laws.

Laws that have been set in motion
Laws that have been broken
Laws that are unleashed.

Up themoutain , she ascended, in her cocoon womb.
Propelled by the impact of the tragedy
Moving upwards into a resurrection storm.

A red sun is setting into an ocean but it appears like it is rising in reflection of the sea.
The wax and wane of retributive sun.
The red temper and disturbance of RAI


312

Mara was standing naked, athe the peak of the hill.
Free form the cocoon
Free to breathe, to stretch, to scream, to weep.
But she didnone of those.
She just stood there, naked, staring from thre mountain
Staring down into the valley, unto the city being ravaged by a red sand storm.
A great and angry power was storming through on a violent wind
The buildings were being eaten alive by the razor like red sand searing through the streets.

Against the backdrop to the destruction of the city , a red sun was setting and another was rising.

From that sun arrivd the red man.

An electric red neon in the form of a man.

It spoke directly to mara who was quietly focusing on the red Man.

The glowing thing spake thus, blessed be he, the red Christ, who hath come to show his hand of
vengeance.
Behold, he who is reaping what man hath sown.

The red Christ formed like a mirage in the heat wave of the red sun, setting.
He who bore the
Red robe of suffering
313

Long, wet black hair
Tongues of red fire for eyes.

The high priest approach mara, his red right hand extended to touch her face.

He grazed her cheek gently, the said,

thus spoke the demon tongue of oro..

Ifoundthemanweepinginthecorner.
Frailandalone
Skinandbones
Heshookwithsuchsorrow
Suchdespairing
Therewerepiecesoftornclothesbeforehim
Hewasnakedandwettinghimself.
Hesobbedhardintotherustedwall
Thenamewrittenonitwaslonggone
(Hebegandefecating)
Hestartedtoshiver.
Hecouldnotseemebutheknewmysmell
Itwasworsethanthemesspooledaroundhisfailingbody
Helookedupintomydirection
Eyesmilkyanddim
Hestoppedsobbing.Hestoppedshivering.
WithhiswetbowelsIdrewthesymbolsonthewall
Iwrotethelanguagewiththebloodinhisurine
WiththewordsonthetoiletfloorIreleasedhim
AndwiththedeathinmyhandIgavehimrest.

Thereisadeathinyourhand,theredChristsaidtomara,butnorestshallbegivenuntothyenemies.
Itisthefatherwhowilldelivertheminhisrealm.Butitsbyhisdaughtershandthattheyareledthere.
314

TheLordtookMarabythehand.

inthenameofthyfather
andoftheredman
ANDASUICIDECHYLDE,
bethee,destroyer.

Idrinkthebloodoftheguiltytomakethemblameless.
And with my blood, I feed it as wine to the monsters.

- the red vampire of christ


dressing tables

swirl of smoke. Burn of lung.
A WRETCHED
COUGH, BROUGHT nine back.
315


Concrete dust exploding from his lungs. His eyes were frozen open so long it was
dry. Then he wept, his ision came back.

It was cold.

deCEMBer first two thousand seven.

There was a hole in the wall where the balcony used to be. Mara was standing
silently at the edge of the hole. Before her a 21 storey drop. The wind was gentle,
and her black dress danced about her like a ghost. she was holding herself
against the chill.

Next to her was a dressing table against the left wall. Its drawers open as if
ransacked. The mirror was cracked down the side. Nine saw she was wearing
black laced gloves.

mara?

I understand the dream. She said slow. As if talking to the night before her.
eyes staring into a melancholic space. I know why she jumped.

Nine walked closer to her as she continued speaking

it is the end of innocence. The end of child ignorance, she turned to face nine,
her eyes softly glowing red. Ive seen the red manIve been touched by the
hand of the red lord.he who is retribution, the wrath that ruined Sodom. And
his temple resides within.
316


And without warning, she leapt through the hole to the terror of nine, her
witness.





Mara felll gathering velocity but the fall did not end. It stripped her psyche
downm sucked downwards into some kind of illogical oblivion. She was fallings
trainght into concrete andinto the black hole of another univers. She fell like a
star, a meteor, straight into THE FIELD, a red power growing with the speed, the
angels of deaths accompanying her down, wingd. dangerous, aroused.

Mara, the destroyer and her host of annihilations screamed like hells creatures
into the field, screeching into the wormhole to the field, straight for the heart and
gut of the terrible zeitgeist of the rooster.

War was at hand.


Awake from ye slumber, it is the LORD who speaks. jesus

lulled from the rip van winkle state, the ornamental figure of Christmas john stirs,
snow flakes swirling like ghost motes in the black night, star rising as a sign for
the magi. A knife gleams in the darkness. A snoring ends.

317

awake from ye slumber, it is the LORDDdddddddd who

yah yahjohn yawns. Stretches. His bones crack and muscles unwind from rigid
mortis sleep of almost a year.dreaming of rebmeceds doom/

god damn rooster








phase III
BOOK 6
THE WAR CYCLE

Here they come to snuff the rooster


Yeah here come the rooster, yeah
318

You know he aint gonna die
No, no, no, ya know he aint gonna die Alice in chains


Theregoesapartofmylife,JohnnyChristmassaid.
Hedroppedapieceofhisdeadskinintothetoiletseatandflushed.
Hescratchedhisarmsanditbledfromsmallholes.
hewinkedintothemirror,thereturnofJohnnyChristmaseh?
Hedonnedhissantahat,acigarinhismouth.
Shovedhisguttingknifeintoitssheath,hiddeninsantaboots.
Hedecidedtogetaphantomcab.
Goodtohaveyouback,sirthebangladrivergreetedhimashegotintothecab.
Withallthisshitflyingaroundthecityfrommonsterroosters?imnotsureifiwanttobeback.
Butyoulovechickensir.
Eatingthem.hesighed,notgoingtowarwiththem.
Youcaneatitafteritsdeadsir,thedriversaidflattonedastheyheadedoff.
Isupposeso...theybetterhavechilli.sambalbelachan.
Imsuretheywillsir,theusualplace?
Ohyes.itstimeforthefirstmealoftheyear.
Verywellthensir.
JohnnyChristmasyawnedafterbeingasleepforexactlytwelvemonths.
Hewasveryhungry.
Letsseeifthecitysbeennaughtyornice.
no rest for the
lords bitch.
when the phantom cab pulled up to the road side eating house, faty joe was
already there.
319

god damn it. johnny christmas said, no rest for the sorry bastards. sorry
boys and girls.
his voices said no worries, that they needed conversation from mad obese
informants to wake up.
i still dont like it, johnny slurred, work before food. that aint right.
get on with it, were the voices advice.
Johnny got out of the cab into the light rain. bright lit neon signs and a
hellishly big kitchen yawned its open doorway. the chief cook rushed out to
greet him.
mister christmas, very nice to see you again. see? i put up tree for you
coming. the chinese man pointed to short robust plastic trees by the road.
very lovely Ching CHing. now, i eat same same.
same same coming! was the excited reply.
Fatty joe wait for you there..he wait long time.
yes, yes. cant miss him.
i go make same same for you eat.
thanks ching.
johnny walked over to the fat drunk informant who was glazing at him with
lopsided vision. seven bottles of TIGER empty on the table.
you fuckin late Christmas.
better than never fatso. Johnny slumped into the red plastic chair and lit
up his cigar.
J is dead. no more flowers. was fat joes first piece of info for John.
god damn it.no good news for the poor bastards huh?
some good news. theres a woman.
oh god. isnt there always one?
shes a destroyer John. youll need the woman.
theyve destroyed me enough.
no, not you. the thing youve woken up to kill.
i can kill that god damn rooster myself.
no you cant. a whole hall full of magicians couldnt do it.dont think you
can.
they were not johnny christmases.
his food came.
a heap of sambal belachan fried rice and eight pieces of chicken fried in
prawn paste.
two bowls of wet sambal. two bows of tiny white shrimp chilli.
two bottles of rich beer. chilli padi.
eat and be happy mister christmas! Mr ching wished him.
big fuckin war ahead my good ching. belly must be armed.
very good! then after war you come back eat celebrate?
if time is not up yes. one last meal before bedtime.
haha HA! ching laughed and went away.
Fat joe removed three folders full of information.
slammed it on the orange table. it shook under the weight.
like blocks of bricks crashing.
not now you lard bastard. Johnny said.
at least let me eat first.
320

The first burp of
Christmas
Was loud, long and nasty. The plates empty, the bottles almost done. Stomach
churning with fire. Johnny Christmas slumped back into his chair, exhausted from
all that eating. Fatty joe was stoning out, almost falling asleep. the rain was still
slowly falling. Christmas lit a cigar and stared at the thick folders on the table. He
didnt feel like opening them.

can we get to biz ness now john boy? fatty joe finally stirred.
Jphnny burped again. guess so.
He really didnt want to get on with it but had no choice. There was no more food to
delay the inevitable.

Joe pushed the first folder off the stack towards john.

These here are the killed.

Pushed the second one over.

These here are those left to fix the mess.

The third one went across.

321

This here are the related doctrines and histories.

Johnny sighed.

The silver key was the last thing joe pushed over.

youre using seventy one this time.

Johnny raised an eyebrow.

you are certainly joking.

I am certainly not. He stood up, almost falling over from intoxication.

my job is over. Its in your hands now john boy., he began stumbling away t o the
roadside for a phantom cab,
Im going home to sleep. Godspeed.

yeah yeah.

With that fatty joe the informant was gone, swept up with a heavier rain and a ghost
taxi trailing off into the dark. Johnny took his time to finish his cigar. Stacked up the
folders and stared across the dark street to the locked up catholic church.

time for work you sorry bitches and bastards, he told his voices.
They cheered, fully awake.
322


Johnny Christmas steps into the terbanacle at the church, smoking his cigar. An
elderly woman looks up at him in shock.

you cannot do that here! she yelled, This is the temple of The Lord!

yep he sucked on his cigar, and Im the Lords bitch.














THEMARCHOFMADMONROE

323

The ghostgimp of Monroe was loud and disturbed. A howling creature trapped in
a full body pvc harness. It clung, unseen to mundane eyes to the back of Monroe
as he struggled against exhhaunstion through the doors of ATON PD
Her burst through the door in miud an doil and blood and madness in his eyes,
driven to salvage the eleven victims. His hair and grown long over an unusually
short time. His nails, beast like and brtal. He could feel blood tricklimng out of
his anus. Heyes bloodshot to hell. The hwole departments tared on staring at the
burnt ghost form although he was battered flesh and one. The captain came out of
his office shocked and terrified at monroes stae.

oh mygodwas all the captain could muster.

we move now. Monroe said st ormingto the ammunitions and gun room. or the
elevn girls die

we have noleads, tehcaptain muttered.

I will bring you to them. We moveNOW. he stormed into the weapons room
and his group followed, including thecaptain.

War was at hand.

THERISEANDRISEOFGLOTHSCHTUCK
glothschtuck struck the bus driver on the head with his staff. it was a long stick at the end of
which was an axed head. it was the head of the bloody baron. since no one cares about him and
hes a moron, well not go into detail. he was the definition of idiot.
an idiot is a fool. the king whom he served, unknowingly bestowed the name on him. Sir Knight
Idiot son of GLOTHSCHTUCK. WTF???????????
he claimed he was indian because at that time, only hindu indians had the son of title at the end
of their names. Glothschtuck at some point decided that the entire title humiliated him and in the
324

end, he dropped the entire title/name from his name.
Anyway, back to the story.
Glothschtuck stood beaming at his deed/misdeed, whatever you see it as. he heaved a cannonball
sigh and held the staff up.
The blinding light was cast at everyone on the bus.
seated in the front extreme left, was a burly looking feathered head. this was the muthafucka
whom of course faced the back. Our feathered friend was a paranoid delussioned twit who
couldnt turn his head back the right way. this caused him to murder everyone out of sight. he
killed with a bloody passion and the bloody baron was here to end it.
ALL Hail Glothschtuck!!
Boom.


Johnny Christmas and the remains of the rooster.
what a god damn mess. johnny said.
do not insult my father, he did not do this. said the Lord.
sorry boss. then who did.
Glothschtuck,
what in gods name is glotschtuck?
i am warning you john. stop involving my father.
sorry boss.
and as for Glothschtuck, you are to address him as Baron if you cross path.
one of yours?
The Lord Glared at Johnny, now you insult ME. He is NOT one of mine. Not of this time and
space. He intrudes but it is for our benefit.
yeah? johnny sucked in his cigar smoke and studied the mess. his beneficence is known.
the bus was blown to bits across the streets. blood and bone and flesh and clothes stuck burning
on the walls.
the place smelt of dead fish. there were rooster feathers everywhere.
johnny tried not to step on glass and severed fingers. he stopped to pick up a feather.
this aint big bastard.
big bastard? the lord queried.
the rooster. the core rooster. this is one of its personalities.
325

i sent you to fix this. why is it multiplying instead of dissapearing?
sorry boss. i will hunt down the parent. kill the core.
you better do it quick. the Lord said, sipping the wine he manifested in a crystal glass in his
stigmata hand. there are people in my heart John, and they are dying. fix this problem. i am
going to be born soon. father will not be pleased if a rooster ate the star thats born.
yes boss.
The lord annoited Johns head with blood. or wine. christmas didnt know which it was.







WAR COMMAND.

HoratioPavlov
326

Carefulnottospillhisabsinth,Horatiocalmlyopensthelaptop.Thetrainheisonshakesalittleand
heconsiderstheeffectsofpandorasbox.Thereisathicknesstohispipe,adeepburningofrich
darkgreenleaves.Heburnsthroughthefinalremainsuntilallisash.Heconsiderstherisingofthe
phoenix,inflames,alive.
HeopensthebookbagandremovesthebookofThoth.Hetakesadeepdrinkfromhiscrystal
absinthglass.Thegreatliquidrefresheshimwhilethesmokeswirlsinthemind,aconduitforclear
transmission.HoratioPavlov,thehierophant,opensthebook.

Earth.Moonexalted.Horus,thechildupontheunionofmanandwomanwithin.Venus.Highest
transformation.Spiritualfather.Advisor.Master.

Heclosesthebook.
Heconsiderstheordersgivenhim.
Hereturnstothelaptop,tapsitskeysawake.HoratioopensthefilemarkedSTATUS-RED.

Asatatelliteiconisblinking

TheHeirophantisloggingon.

Heobservesthedate.2)5a.m.22-12-2007
Rootedinthenumber7.

Hemakestheconnection.

Status-redgoeslive.

327

dont shoot me santa


clause, no one else
around believes me,
put that fucking gun down santa!
shut up john, just shut up! his white gloved hand trembling with his finger on the
trigger.
youve never killed. Dont waste such virginities on me!
shut up man, shut up man!
I cant fucking die you stupid fat prick
BANG
GOD DAMN IT SANTA!
BANG..BANG BANG BANG
will you fucking stop it you crazy old \
BOOOM!!!
oh for Gods sake, not grenades..
BoOOM.!!!!!
Sigh

Johnny Christmas proceeded to the bench made manifest while santa lost his mind.
Running around blowing things up.
Firing his endless gun into endless air.
Screaming about his white beard.

Johnny lit up a cigar, leaned back to rest his back.

Sigh.

When the explosions finally receded and santa was tired out, he fell unto his buttocks
and slunk his shoulders in despair.

Finish was his only word.
bout fucking time fatso.
youre too rude to be Christmas.
328

I pity your raindeers fat boy.

I need meat.

rudolphs looking a little plump.

my elves will kill you with their ice cold green magic!
no magic can kill me Nicholas. Now come on. We need to find the hierophant.



DownONANstreet,offATON,comesthedarkplaceofperversion.Analtspaceresideswithinitunseen.
Theplaceofthedarknessofdoors.

Thereisadarkenedtheatrethere,abandonedsavedfortherestlessspiritsinperil.Anditshowsthe
filmsofthelatestperversions.Doneinreallife.Torealgirls.

Thetitleoftonightsfilmis

TheLUSTofGrHg
AndMonroe,intoxicatedwithpillsandalcoholandchemicalsandblackflowers,entersthecinemato
watchtheupdates.

Thefilmopens:

OUTSIDESUN&THECAF23-12-2007

Whasim,fromGalileesellsmethetickets.Imakethefirstpurchaseatoutsidesun&thecaf,andI
returntothemotherwomb.WiththemagickofAVO,Ienterastateoftrance.Withblackflowers
inducedintheblood,Iformthepersonalities.HoratioPavlov,whohascometotaketheplaceofdead
Immanuel.JohnnyChristmas,whoistheanti-herowhowillkilltherooster.Two,ofthelastthreefigures
ofcyclicalmagi,cometowitnessthebirthandsavingofthestar.Thethirdarrives,atoutsidesun&the
cafandheisthefirstpersonImeet,inthisplaceofnewbirthandincubations.Earlynocturnetrance
signalshisjourney,onlybeginning,onlyjustreturning.Heisthinandtonedafteryearsofraving.Hehas
329

seenandmergedwithmachinesofmagicmusicalorders.Technologiesalienandsatellitewithmidnight
dialsandLEDlights.HeconnectswithAldrin,thesunriser,andmovesinthewhitelightofthewomblub.
Thethirdmanwhoarrives,inblackandspace,isEliAvaR.
Hestandsbeforemytable.
youthehierophant?
welcomebackEli.
Hesits,ordersastrongicedmilktea.onlywaytowakeup.
everyoneswakingup.Didyoubringthemixdiscs?
Iveupgraded.Hepassesmean111GBtouchscreenmusicplayer.Sleekblack.
Itakethemachinefromhim.Ialreadysenseitspower.Thishereis48hoursofWARTRANCE.
good.Haveyourteaheartily.Afterthis,weregoingtoraisethedead.

JohnnyChristmashasntsleptintwentyfourhours.Hevisitsthechurchforthefirstvisitduringsunrise.
HemeetsthereverendChristopher.Theyspeakinthedarkandsilentconfessional.
Chrisbegins,TheLordprovides,butyoumustanswer.
Imustanswerforeverybloodything,
mindyourlanguageinthehouseoftheLord.
yeh..andImtheLordsbitch.
haveyouseentheLUSTofGrHg?
Imstillgettingnightmaresfromit.Goddamnmonster.
theRoosterisdoingthissaystheLord.Heisremindingyouthatyouonlyhavetwodaysleft.
yehyehIknow.
haveyouseenthethirdmagi?
no.
heisalreadyarrived.Andhespeakswiththehierophant.
boutbloodytimethewarsoundtrackcame.
330

beonyourwaythengoodjohn.Theworldawaitsyourrighteousactions.
godhelpusalleh?helightsupacigar
donotsmokeherejohn.

ThetenthboxarrivedatATONPOLICEDEPARTMENTalittlepastsixinthemorning.Glovedandfatigued,
theendlesslyworkingteamofdetectivesbeginstoopenthebox.Apairofshoes,socksneatlybundled
up.Asmalldenimskirtandapinkt-shirt,neatlyfoldedup.ThemissinggirlsIdentitycardwasplaced
onthetopofthepile.Thedejectedcaptainsunkloweruponlearninganothername.thiswasthetenth
boxofclothessentfromthemobofkidnapperswhoclaimedproudresponsibilityfortheelevenmissing
girls.Theymadethepromise,tothefamilies,theauthorities,thepoliticians,thepriests,themedia,that
theywouldravishandkillalleleventeenagegirlsbyChristmas.Thetensionwasmountinglikethe
suddenstormsofDecemberandeachtickoftheclockmarkedagreaterapproachtotragedy.The
captainandhisteamwererunninhoutofoptions.Monroeissupposedlykilledinthefireofthehouseof
wualthoughnobodyhasbeenrecovered.Noneoftheotherpsychicscouldtracetheenemywithat
leastthreepsychicswoundedanddamagedwhentryingtofindthelostgirls.

Daysandnightsmergedinsleeplessnessanddesperationasthetheauthoritieshitdeadendafterdead
endinanimpossiblerunagainsttime.

Timereloops.NINEiswatchingMarastandnexttothegapingholeinthebalcony,theexittoa21storey
drop.Sheisfacingthedressingtable,slippingintoeroticskirtsandstockingsandunderwear.Sheis
puttingonhermakeup.NINEwatchesherlikeanopiatewitness,driftinginandoutofahazydreamlike
perceptionofareformeddarlingofthedestruction.seductionwillbethefallofSodom,shesaidto
themirror.Todanceisthetribalactofhypnotism,theentranceintootherworld.Themanofthemusic
hadtoldme,thethirdmaginakedandlovinguponmybedofunreasonablesleep.

Aretchingnoisecameformtheotherendofthehall.Thewetdrasticsoundofexcretionfollowed.

Monroewasnakedandhairyandsicklyinthecorner.Hewasdefecatingandvomtinguptheeleven
pairsofpantiesinhisstomach.Withatremblinghandheseparatedthemessontheflooranddrew
331

symbolsinthebileandbloodandslimeofhiswaste.Inthepileofsteamingundigestedguck,heread
thegrossspreadandlearntthespells.
HisGIMPwasmasturbatingintheprayerroom.

TherewasanopensuitcaseonthetablebetweenMonroeandmara.Initwerestacksofmoneyfilledto
thebrim.Thesewerethecurrenciesoffilthandthetwoarethemerchantsofwar.

Theadorationroomwasfilledwiththickcigarsmoke,blueandgreyfogintermingling.Fromthepiece
ofTheLordsflesh,encasedinthegoldensunrayornamentcamethevoicebthatthusspakethuntoJ.C.
thoushaltgoshoppingfortheheadsofmyenemies.
ThedaggeroftheLordsbitchchargesupontheencasementholdingthemagickalornamentofthe
Lordsflesh.ItradiatesinstructionsonlyJohnnycanhear.

TherepeatedmotifofsuicidehauntstheskiesofTHEFIELD.Thedeathshipsswimsidewaysabove,likea
sicklyfish.Slowanduncertainoflife,thedeathshipsfloatindisarrayabovethebrownbuilding.

Fingernailsofdeadvictimsaregrowinguponitswalls.Thestenchofdeadfishisthickandoppressivein
thesquaremilesaroundtheblasphemedbuiding.Frominside,theterriblenoiseofthescreaming
roosterburstsandbleedstheearsofthesaintsthatstandwatcharoundit.Outsidetherainpours
poisonedsaltwater.Theguttersareflooded,thegravesturningandcomingtolifeinthemud.Deathis
coming,listeningtothesirenlikescreamoftherooster.Findingitswayfromitsalmostfullterminto
doomentrancetotheworld.Fromabovetheangelsarefallinglikesnow.Powerandlifetakenfrom
themslowlylikeafatalcancer.OnebyonetheFieldservantsdriftdownwardintomartyrdom.
Elsewhere,childrenareweepinginlockedrooms.

332



the war room
great figures danced around in fighting and flighting. Winged creatures
screaming against hallowed walls, crashing into ceilings. FIRE somewhere, FIRE
burning down the t emple, split it in two and saul will rebuild in three days.

Frenzu occurs at the soundo f that name:

Fighting and flighting.

The mastodons crumbled through the iron gates, bending steel, furious names.

Battle ring ON!

Sirens call the name of enemies

Lost at sea! Lost at sea!

The sattelitte stumbles, diverting, making the war ships follow it down into the
ember (sheol, gammorah! FIRE)

Black fire
333

Red fire
(war of the zeitgeist revisited.)

Open mouth gaping black hole.

Repeat command !
Firewall discharged.
Soil trembling with the moving tanks. Its darker in the jungle, its darker in the
heart.

Soldiers having nightmares.

Babies crying.

Feet slapping on wet sand.

Young girls running away naked from their captors.

War come! War come!

The rooster crows long before dawn.

the war hall
334

mara is wriggling out of her tiny white panties in a hall full of lustful
men.
This is what father has taught her. She dances. She enchants. She is wearing a big red
ball gag and shes drooling on the bare feet of the cheering men. She moves her body to
the dark electro beat. The men are already ripping apart the dress she tossed to them in
her act. Theye ach want a piece of cloth that clung to her body. They are in rupture as she
moans into her ballgag with dark eroticism.

Monroe is in the guest room , telling his victim not to cry when he unties her, that she
was safe.

Monroes gimp was charging elsewhere in the hall of war.




24dec07
335

7 days till the end of
the year of the
wraith.
Johnny xmas paints
his nails black. After he had cut it
neatly.
He leaves the church, dagger charged and in boot. He finds a phantom cab
waiting.

the white tower, seventy one. He tells the ghost driver.
no. no go there. Bad power.
yes. Lord say go there.
mm. god say, I do. the driver takes johnnyc hristmas to the war field.


Horatio and Eli finds a phantom cab waiting. ocean_frictional. HOration says.
Eli is caught surprised.
336

I thought it was destroyed in the last apocalypse.?
only resting.



THE WAR HAUS
there is money
burning
Into the elevator shaft, saul tossed the luggage full of cash on fire. The smoke
rises through the haunted building in THE FIELD.

Outside, the red storm has come with mara, who stands in a red string and tiny
red bra, her neck broken, her lips pierced with fishhooks. the revenge of the
oracle through maras aspect is exacted. The almost naked dead girl walks
towards the cursed building, her storm a rush of violent red sand wind tearing
thebuilding and the city around it apart.
337

Like figures in a
blurred screen rage,
they approach the
rooster.

The money is burning. American notes. Its nearly Christmas eve.
Gunfire in the nights treets. Cold night. The hwores are all sick.
Rush hour. Late night shopping. Lights of wonderland, delusion, grandeur,
festive joy. Cold Christmas cominh.

loneliness is not a phase.

Alice was in chains then. Till the death. The suicide. The end of it.

I remember it was rainingvoices somewhere on the street. A girls voice. I
remember the other office. I remember.
338


ENDnotes


theadministratorsvisitedATONstreetwiththeriotpolice,scaredastheywereofuncertainties.even
beforeenteringthemaintollgates,somehadbecomesick,thevantheyrodeinstoppedforthemto
pukeintobushes.thefoldersintheirhandstrembled.weretheytobekilledorrapedorsacrificed?they
darednotthinkofit.theycouldbecursed,turnedintothementallyill.they,howeverhadtodotheir
jobs.

"money?" Avo said, "i do not work for money. i work to make the world turn. to make ripples in the sands of humanity. i
move with the tide as much as i move it and it, me. you understand?"
the little boy shook his head. what a young fellow, looking for his chipmunks. Avo patted him on the head. "i need to go
restring guitars." he said, "you want a guitar?"
the little boy shrugged. Avo finished his cigarette, emptied the golden red bull can and dropped the butt in. the sugar hit
him, forcing his adrenaline to rise that one bit notch, however little that was. "you take it easy little fella."
avo returned to work.

Uncertainofthefinaloutcome,thetwooldmenplaychess.Alreadyhalfanhour
pastmidnight,thesnowisfallingbutslowly.Theoldmenarenotsocold.

trustthesecrazymagiciansandtheirfuturesystems.Itsmadnessforusfolks.
339

toooldforthisshiteastheoldblacksofthedaysay.
ha!Oldblacks.Ihadanoldblackwoman.Finepriestessshewas.
oh,yougoforanypriestess.Evenofwitches.
loveem!.
Theycontinueplaying.
wheredowegoafterthis?oneasks.Contem,platinghisfriendsmove.
OldfolkshomeinATON.Safehousetheysay.
ha!Them.
them.Yes.Check.
oldfool!.Movestosafetyhispiece.
.jinglebellswithJohnnyeh?Hisornaments,goldballs.Bloodybombstheyare.
thinkwellhavechickensoon?
Theotheroldmanshrugs,check.Dontknowiftheycankilltherooster.
Theoldmansaveshiskingagain.goddamnviolenceItellyou.
ummhmm.Theytaketheirsipofsteamingcoffee.
Contemplatesthegame.
.Youevergettiredofwaiting?
fortheraisinguponthelastday?
ofanything.
likeforThiswartobeover?
likethatyes.
no.Idontgettiredofwaiting.Immortalsdonothingbutwait.Youdontthinkaboutitmuch
anymore.
likesleeping.
ha!Yes.Youmisssleeping?
sometimes.Thedreamsaredifferent.
340

vague.Itsmoreconcretehere.
butvaguedreamsholdmoststories.
everythingsastory.

THEOMANDAEAPPROAACHwasagoodone.
sendinghisfutureselfbackintothepast.Iagree.
youeverthinkwellgetthatkindofmagicagain?
notaoneoffthing.Itsthenextthing.Itllbemainstreaminawhile..nextyearmaybeitllend.
but.
nobutschildren.

ohmy.
what?
madpolicemanattacks.
Theotherlooksatthechessboard.
fierce.

Theyvoyeur

funnyhowpeoplearestillshopping.
Rushingforpresents.Buyingwineanddresses.
plentysexyes?
whilethiswargoeson,.Thiscosmoschanges.
plentysex.partydrugs.
341

thinksomeofthemwillseewhentheyrehigh?
thewar.?
Theoldmannods.
no.toofar,evenforacidheads.Onlysaulheads.Outherheads.Yes.Notshopiingpeople.
whatarusheh?
itsyourturn.
Theydrinkcoffee..

WARPATH

342

MONROE BINDS MARA. LOCKED IN THE BLACK VAN. SHOPPING.
MONROE DRINKS THE TEARS OF THE VIRGIN.
ACK!
POSSESSED!


Youcometauntuswithfoolishtoymagick!
Puppetsandstones?HHAHAHAHH!!

Theghostgimpbreaksloose.
Maraistypingfuriouslyintothenotebook.
Writingthestoryofthedeathoftherooster.
Sweatingtomakeitmanifest,.

bartender,thedoorshavereturnedbutanearthquakehits.ERCONDUSnotices.
Muchtimehadbeenstolen.

343


An ocean of sound like a fury.

Therecomes,bitslikerain,awintergonebad,animalsdyinginthesnow.
Offthedistancingblindingwhite,thepeoplearescreaming
ThereisasoundofaROOSTER

nowweregoingtospendallourtime
wehavealreadyfoundit.

what?!Where?

abrothelinATON.

god.Anotherwhore?
thecustomer.
who?
saul.
goddamnit!
TheLORDisyourfriendandhesnear.Youblaspheme?Itshisbirthday,doyoudare?
alwaysdared.Andmotherfuckingsaulscrewingathaigirl.
Japanese.
whatever.Whatishedoingbangingahoe?
becausethatishisdestiny.
bullshit.HismagickalnamespelleddifferentlyisVIRGIN.Hewillalwaysbeone.
344

Yes. he will always be a virgin. As far as making love to someone who loves him is
concerned. He pays for his lovemaking John. It has become a transaction instead of a
transcendentalact.forthatactalone,heisvirgin.
anotheronesgonethen.
anotheronehasleftforthegarden.
yes.Thekeeper.
offtoseetheenemy.
Hehasembracedhisenemy.HisenemyisLUST.
wearelosingtheplot.
itsalreadylostwiththecomingoftheROOSTER.
dothemenatthecoffeeshopknowaboutit.
someofthemarealreadydead.
whensthewar?
wevebeenatwarfor24andahalfhours.
mygod.
itstartedinthechurch.Midnightmass.Christmasmorn.
whosfronting?
JohnnyChristmas.
ohgod.doesthatmeanwereteamB?
Ibelieveso.

Thetwooldmentookofftheirclothesinthesparsenightroom.

thereisthecreepthatwillcommitthenativitysin.

345

25
th
December2007

Thereisnotmuchlifeindaylightmorning.Thereisvodkaandvomitinthebushes,signsof
overconsumptionduringthexmasevepartiesacrossthecountry.
Thereisalull.
Monroeisnightmaring.
Visionseatinghimlikecancerreptilesinthegut.Sick,acidic,(aseminakedgirltiedupina
giftwrappedbox.)

Horrificearlyvisionsofthemonsterandothernames.Jamie.Nicole.LYN.

Sleepless.Fullofmilktoneutralizeintoxication.

MONROESWEATSinbed.Seeingthefuture.
AH,horrors.

EveryonesdesireswerestolenatmidnightandthedayofChristmaswasdevoidoffeeling
andenergyandlife.

(driedcumonbloodredsheets)

DAY2:

allthebeautifulgirlsareherebutalsogone.
346

itsgettinghardertobreathe,hardertosee

theysaidpiecesoftheendwillcome,inrandomorder.Inchaosandconfusion.Suchlame
wordscomparedtothis.Suchmeaninglessnesswhennotfullyexperience.d

yourefadingawaypeople,weneedthemicsignalsstrengthenedup

YET another old astronaut sits in a bar, recalling days of the blue earth, nights eternal on
themoon.Takingpiecesofthemoonbackwasthemistake

and dreams become butterflies, become sand, become machines of carnival glory.

therewasmadnessinanydirection.-HST

27122007

Ercondus,meetsSaulinthedrinkingroom.

TheblackstonesonthewallofpubdelabluesfellwhenS\themanarrived.

Adoorhadopenedforhim.Hestoodamongthetwo.Ercondusandthebarkeeper.

fixmeamidnighttide.Saulspokeanditwasdoneuntohim.
Ercondusrecognizedthereference.
youdrinkthesamedrinkasELI.
inadifferentstateoftrance,wearethesame.
347

then,areyouhimnow?
Saulponders,drinkingmidnighttide.
we are not him. Tonight, I am returning to my roots. To the pub de la blues, to tell
youthestoryofmywarandwithit,thewayitends.

he darkens the room with his mind. He is after all master of this dominion. The
place of miserables and in mourning. The act of loss manifested in reflection of the
elementsthatexpressesit.Instrumentsofgriefandcontinuity.
Hecontinuesdrinkingthedarkdrink,.

this is both troubling and liberating. You must understand. A war goes on in my
name. a war that spans at least three universes. There is no real name to the thing
Ivecreatedbuttherearenumbers.Onethousandonehundred.Andthisisthelastof
itsdarkestnights.

Fate of the rooster.


Part one.2:11-28-12-
07.

TheROOSETR,roseaboveground,andstoodontopofasmallhutthatsoldlittlegirls
underwear. The ROOSTER was smoking a cigar, in defiance towards his enemy,
JohnnyChristmas.
348

JohnnywasjustlightinguphisHavana.
youlittlepieceofshit.JohnnyspatattheROOSETR.
doyouknowhowmanyyoungonesaresufferingbecauseofyou?
Hetakesstepstowardsthedandydressedmonstercock.
doyouknowhowmanyaredead?
Hepullshisdaggeroutofhisrightsantaboot.Hechewsonhiscigar.
yourefuckingfriedchicken.
Instead of going for the neck, Johnny Christmas stabs the foot of the monster while
yellingtheaccursed,HARCHONGKAI!

Theburdburnsuppinfierceflame.

TheLordworksinmysteriousways.Fuckingfriedchickenindeed.

ThepoweroftheroosterincutofffromtheHALLwhere:

MONROEisburningaluggagebagfilledwithAmericannotesturnedhellmoney.
Thebagburnsandmaraleoro,channelingthespiritofthedeadgirl/queenofordom,
begins slaughtering the men trapped in a doorless room, snared in her ball-gag
enchantments.Ofabrokennecklollingaboutonafinealmostnakedbody.

DEATHBYGSTRING.
349

DEATHBYDCUP.

feelasthesickscumfeel.

feellikethehorroryouinflict.

feellikealittlegirl,rapedbybigfoulman.

One by one the tycoons of the perverse GrHg fall to their knees, foaming bile at the
mouth,stomachturnedupwards.
(bladderbursting,contentssuckedintobloodstream/airstream(lung))

CHOKE.

350

ItsraininginOMANDAE

theresashalloverthegirlinthewhitedress..

becareful,shesahaunter.Letthegirlpass.

howmanymoredays/

four.

Ihopeitreallyendsthistime.

itwill.

ONTHELASTDAY.

itseemedcolderthen,Monroesaid.
didit?marastubbedouthercigaretteinatinashtray,staringintoawhitehorizon.
351

Theyweresittingaroundasmallwhiteplastictable,inthemiddleofanAntarctic.Nothing
formilesaround.Theywerewaiting.Theirspiritsweredrained.
Theyweredyingoutinthecold.
atleasttheyoungonesarealive.MarawantedtoreassureMonroe.
yestheyareandalliswellforthem.butwe,mara.wemustpayforthemagicweplaywith.
evenwhenweveuseditforgood?
thereisnogoodorbad.Thereisonlytheuseofmagicanditsconsequences.Wenowpay
theconsequences.
I do not believe this. Weve gone through so much physical t rauma while saving those
elevengirlsandkillingtheirmagickalcaptorsandnowwemustbepunishedforit?
notpunished.Judged.
judged?AndWhoistojudgeusthen?
Monroe smiles, peers ahead and laughs at the coincidence. you can ask that man riding
hereonanass
Maralookedinmonroesdirection,squintedhereyes.
ohLord.Shesaid.
Monroelaughed.indeed.
Thentheybeganhearingtheforwardguardcallout,makewayfortheLord!

Januaryschild.

The DJ hung himself from the tree. In the morning light of the new day, MONROE awoke,
halfnakedinavillageturnedclubneighborhoodthatwascompletelyvacant.Itwasasif,in
mid party on new years eve, everyone had vanished unexpectedly. Half cups of drinks
were left about, shadows of unopened bottles were cast onto the wall. Taps were running
inthelavoratories.
352

Graffitispelt

arierep

lostrecon

eli

onmenus,driftingaboutonthewindslikeghosts,weredeletednames.

Illneedyoutocuthimdown.Thesuddenmidgetsaid.
orwouldyourathergofindyourlostnakedgirlfriend?

Thevillagewassubmergeddownahill,itoverlookedthewildjungle.
Likeoldschoolhousesconnected.Longcorridorsandlargeemptyhalls.

Hernameechoedintheabsences.

mara!Mara!

Naked,sheisfoundwanderingnearthefountain,gettingherfeetwet.

She is hugging herself, her hair is wet and streaked red. She seems shivering, staring into
space.
353

The,midgettrailedMonroeimpatiently.youllhavetocutdownthedeadmannowmister.

Thedeaddjwasburiedwithchampagneglasses,bottlesofbeerandcigarettepacksfulland
empty.

Afterthecheapceremony,therewasnothingelseodobutwait.

Day;ightislongerthannightbutwithnight,timevanisheswhenyouexpectitto.

DAYTHREE

Nine and Jaqi walk down past neon hotels and rows of prostittutes from china. She
observed that they stood by the drain, unaware of its symbolic power. The network that
connectsthedarkanddirtyunderground.

Thewaveswashedthebloodoftheroosteroverjohnnysbarefeet.Thesunwasrisingon
the island resort, the almost beheaded rooster, rolling about dead with the coming
tide.Itswetandcrumpledwingstickingoutintotheair,itseyeswhiteandlifeless.

JohnnyChristmaswasreachingtheendofhistrip.Thetwelvedayswassoontobefinished.
Daynine,andhisfeetiswet.Thestenchoftheslaughteristhickintheairwiththe
deadfish.Thoughnodeadfishesstainedthisbeautifulsunrise.
354

Theghostofamorningravehauntedthebeachfrontalthoughthesilencebeneaththevast
empty tent was staggering. White curtains flapped against the wind. The sound of
thehushedmorningasgivingwaytoroughercrashingofthesea.

HeLettheoceanclaimitsdeadchildren.
He paces down the beach, weary, looking for the seaside village club.looking for the girl-
childmaraandthepervertedElijah.

On the morning of January third, the mad detective Monroe was possessed by the demon
whocalledhimselfpussyface.
Pussyfacewasalreadygivenabribebride.AyoungChinesewhore.
Monroeneededinformation.

Hestartedquestioningthespirit.
whathasbecomeofGrHganditsconsorts?.

it has seen the red beauty, the grotesque daughter of the avenging red god. It knows its
place and its place isnt here. Bound then is GrHg and its consorts to its own
dominion.

goodthen.Wheretonext?

the resting place. The filth club BOWEL MOVEMENT. To find Johnny Christmas. Bid him
hisgoodbyes.

Pussyfacedemandedonemoregirl.
nomorepussiesmyghostfriend,unlessyouwanttoowemeanotherboon.
355

nomoreboonsformadcop.
then,returnwelltothydarkplace.
wetandwarm.

Andwiththatthedevil,pussyfacewasgone.

TAKINGBACKOFGHOS~HAUS

Pastthebrothels,NINEandJaqicametothe24hourmall.
Theresurrectioncrisiswasnearagain.
356

Teeh streets is colder, less hectic now that the red December has passed making way for
Januaryschild.Butsocoldisthisbirth.

hadmararoamedTHEFIELD?Afterthewarwasdone
isthewarreallydone?
Thereisnoanswer

_____

THE THREE GUN


PROJECTOR WAS IN
ITS TESTING STAGE
ATTHEOCEAN_
FRICTIONAL.
357

Whenthefirstpowershadcometothesilentandcoldclub,HORATIOPAVLOVinstructed
ELItopoweruptheprojectorsfirst.

words.Names.Poetry.Everythingbeginswiththosefirstthree.HoratioexplainedtoELI.
We must charge those first. He plugged the cable connected the three gun straight
into his laptop. ELI had tried his best to not notice the hundred and eleven bodies
littered on the main dancefloor. According to HORATIO, they were asleep and not
dead.andtheyshallberaisedontheLASTday.Thehierophantsaid.

werelate.Cametheinterruption.ThetwomenturnedtofindJohnnyChristmas,smoking
acigar.Bluesmokewasfillingtheplace.

Johnnygrumbled,thewarstartedmorethanaweekago,wherethehellisthesoundtrack?
heseemedanxious.
thiscannotbe,saidtheHeirophant.
for fucks sake Horace, you yourself should know what kind of weird magic 1000, 100 is.
You KNOW time dont apply here, nor prophecies, nor future reading. Were dealing with
THEROOSTER,hereandhesshittingalloveryourplans.Nowisthesystemup?
weneedtochargethenamesandthewordsandpoetryfirst.Itsalmostdone.
getyourgrooveonpixelman.AndELI,whyarentyouattheconsole?
HOrationexplainedthathedidntshowhimyet.
andwaitforwhat?Musicforourfunerals?Whothehellisgoingtoplaywheneveryones
dead.?
ok,okImsorry.Eli,itsoverthere,behindtheblackcurtains.
getyourgrooveonbrotherEli.Theydontcallyouthefirstfornothing.
thewhat?ELIturnedback.
358

nononothing.Ifyouvegotmoreblackflowers,Isuggestyouconsumethem.Youllneedit
behindthatconsole.Whenalltehsedeadfuckersareupravingtothemarchoftheend.
WiththatELI,vanishedbehindtheblackvelvetscreenofblackflowersandelectrotrance.

Themusicwasmissing.Thatwastheproblem.Johnnydecided.Thatswhyitwassoeasyto
kill the rooster. The fried chicken was a fake. The one glothstuck killed was a clone. The
one mara destroyed with a red storm was a replicant. None of them were the real thing.
And there was only two days left for Johnny Christmas to kill the rooster; with the rest of
hisgang.

Onthescreensthekeynamesflashed.

STATUSREDWASUPDATING..

MARALEORO:,THEDESTRYOER,SHEWHOWRITESOMANDAE.
ELIJAHMONROE,MADPOLICEMANPSYCHICNECROMANCER.
ELI,THEFIRSTELECTRO/TRANCEDJ,FIRSTSAENTOFTHEFIELD.
JAQIDANIELLEDELUCIA,THELASTOFTHEVAULTOFM
DOCTOR HORATIO PAVLOV, THE NEXT ANTHOLOGEIST. ORCHESTRATOR-STRATEGIST-
GENERAL-PHILOSOPHER.
SAUL,THENEU-SUNGOD,CODENAMED,THESOURCE
GHOS~HAUSTHEHEIROPHANT
ERCONDUS,THELASTNOMADOFTHEFIELD
359

NINE,THEGHOSTWRITER

LICKING WOUNDS
AND OTHER PARTS.
BOOKSEVEN.
(EPILOGUE)
360

361

TheLORDvisitsourlostsouls
Tosurveythedamage
Weseeabonfire
Burninginhiseyes
Andhewhispers
Itstheatrocities,ofyourstories.

- Antony&theJohnsonsAtrocities.
-

362

Nearfuture:
Theglasscityrisingwiththemorningsun.highintheglasstower,theyoverlook.Theboy
andthegirl,watchingtheworldwakeup.Amanandawoman,awaitingorders.Theman
isrockingtoandfroinhisleatherchair,aguninhishand.Thewomanisdrawingpictures
on the white table with blood from a hunting knife. In the background, on the floor, is the
deadman.Guttedandshotpointblankinthehead.Hisbloodisstillwetandfresh.Theman
in the chair abruptly stops rocking. The woman looks up. whats wrong? he was staring
out the glass wall into the city but he also seemed to be listening to something else. Or
watchingsomethinghappeninginhismind.Thewomanisgettinganxious.Waitingforthe
mantospeak.

Hestartsrockingagainbutnotashardasbefore.
363

the nine Is in order. He said. He suddenly got up, keeping his gun in its holster. were
neededsomewhereelse.
whatabouthispartner?sheaskedthemanasshegesturedtothedeadbody.weneedto
killhertoo.
Themanisalreadywlakingoutoftheinvadedapartment,itsherluckydaythen.
Heopensthedoor.
Thepartnerisjustwalkingoutofthelift,towardsthehouse.Shepauseswhensheseesthe
manstandinginherdoorway.Hepullsouthisgun.
Insilencer,toSilenceher.
notsoluckyIguess.
Beforeshecanscream,thebullethits.Squarebetweentheeyes.Shedropswithasoftthud
onthecarpetfloor.Thewomanwalkspastherman.
webettergetlostbeforethelaundryladycome.
Illbekeepingthegirlspanties,themantoldthewoman.
suityourself.Hisloverreplied.Nohintofjealousy.
Hestealsthegarmentoffthecorpse.

poorsickchild.
The hierophant watches her in the library caf. Sniffling with her flu, slender neck, sweet
young one. He marks down the sign of GrHg upon the notebook. Marking the time it
surfacedwithitsvilethoughts.Focusonthesubjectmatter.Hewaitswatchingthegirlbut
heisalsowaitingforpeoplefromthefuture.

Samanandawomancameuptohim.Hecouldsmellbloodonthem.
youthehierophant?themanasked.
364

Hegesturedtothechairs
Elijah,Mara,sitdown,please.
Hewasgentlemanlyandaged.
Monroesensedhispowerandperversions.
youeverkilledatimebandit?Heaskedofthem,
Marasaid,wedontdospacetimeinterference.
butthisconcernstimestolenfromtwoofyouaswell.
Thiscaughtheirattention.Thehierophantcontinued.
Monroe,youreallcleanedupandstraight.Tellmehowyoucametothis?
Monroecouldnotanswer.
mara,youreboredandweary.Whathappenedtotheenergyofthedestroyer?
Shetoocouldnotanswer.
howmanyyearshaspassedyouthink?
They both seemed suddenly aware that they were not aware, like a veil had been lifted
adterthedeviljournalistplayedelevenquestions.
your memories have been stolen. Your personalities changed though your profession is
manynumbersaboveandbeyondyourusual.Whathasbeentraded?
Thecleanedupmonroewasspeechless.Marahadlifecomingbackintoherlifeintheform
ofanxiety.Theveilisliftedhigher.

__

THE HIEROPHANT surveys the damage, watches the hour on the clock. JOHNNY
CHRISTMASisstationedoutside,inthecold,smokinghiscigar,countingdowntheminutes.
The 12 days of Christmas will be over in a little over an hour. No one is sure of the
ROOSTER is truly dead and gone. Only statistics remain. Suicide figures drop. Eleven girls
are saved, eight are discharged, four are in psychotherapy. Accident figures fall seventeen
365

percent.Pricesgoup.Numbersarechanginginthecity.Thecityischangingintoanaotehr
city.Newjourneysbegin.

Hetakeshislaptop,,finisheshiscoffee.Catchesaphantomcabindaylight,timeblurring.a
hazeuponrealityastheygoabouttheirwaysandhegoesabouthis.Hetellsthedriverthe
nameofanasylumhospital.

Asthetaxijourneys,hethinksoftheordersgiventomaraandMonroe.killthetimebandit.
Takebackourmemories,strangetheymaybe

Hethinksofthethingsheneedstosay,toexplain.

Theyerachthehospital.Thedandydressedoldmanbuyssomeflowers.Hepunchesthelift
buttons.Hewalksthepaths.Findsthedoors.

goodmorningmara.Heannounces.

Sheisstretchinginbed,inherhospitalclothes.

hellofather.

your future self responded to my call today. oh good.: she was rubbing her eyes,
yawning.Ihopeshesok.
shewillbe.
howarethegirls?
A stream of figures regenerated itself. A repeating of comings and goings. The loss of
innocence,findingthefountainsofyouthandimmortality/
366

doyouthinkitllwork??shefinallyaskedthehierophant.
what?
theomandaemaneuver.
its theonly thing weve g ot left. Thatis why you need to rest. You need to write again
soon.HEsqueezedherhand.Sheseemedyoungerthismorningtohim.
Partsofhertrueselfarereturningafterthepossession.
allwillbewellmydear,dontyouworry.Hekissedherforehead.
Ivegottogo.
Shekeptsilentatfirst.Sad.sayhellotohimformewillyou?sheaskedsoftly.
ofcourse.Hereplied,softly.
Heletgoofherwarmhand.

_____

The BDSM club was cold because itw as almost empty. The goddess was no where. The
men in black wer eoplayinga stripped down gothic set. The lead is almost whispering,
makingshortgroaningnoisesfromhisthroatlikeweaklydying.Weepingocasisonally

Monroewasaloneathebarwithaquartofwhiskeyleft.Hunchbacked,dejected.
TheHEIROPHANTapproachedhim,drinkalreaydinhand.
anysignofher?heaskedthetiredcop.
Hejustshookhisheadastheeldersatnexttohim.
whatthehellhappenedbackthen?heaskedthehierophantagain.
Andagain,hetredtoexplain.

367

your ghost gimp was wiping out the fourth floor when she just disappeared. She entered
one of the rooms and was gone. Her enemy also had vanished but the seventeen year old
girlwasscaredbutsafe.

BythetimeteamBraidedthemall,youwerealreadyoutcoldandmarawasgone.
Johnnychristmasfoundherand..anotehraspectofyoubyanabandonedvillageclubbythe
sea of arghe. Mara was in a trance. You were trying to get her, naked, into your magickal
circle.Youhadcutyourself.

Monroe looked at his slashed arms again, now only just healing and could not remember
anyofit.

whataboutmymemories/

thatswhatIwantedtotalktoyouabout.Yourfutureselfreturnedseveralhoursago.He
responded to my call.

theomandaemaneuver?
yes.Thirdtimeinthelastthreemonths.
Ivesenthimoutwithanotheraspectofmaratokillthetimebandit.Whentheheadofthe
thiefreturns,sodoyourmemories,andthememoriesofeveryoneelse.

whatnow?

wewait.

368

Inthemorninghalflight,NINEsawthenakedprostitute,huddledbetweenthetombstones
of ALBU and CHANG. She was crying, as if afraid of him. NINE got up, foundhimself in a
cemetery.Theteenagewhorebackedawayalittlemorewhenhemoved.Shesobbedinto
hair.

pleasedonttouchmeanymoreshepleaded.
NINEWasbackingawayfromher
Notknowinghoworwhatwashappeningtohim,toher.

The trainstation is fogged. A white cold mist in the darkness. Sirens in the distance.
Thephantomtrainisapproaching.Johhnychritsmasisfinishingoffhiscigar,blackluggage
inonehand,santabootsslungoverhisshoulders,weaponcleanlydisposedoff.
we tried our best John. The hierophant assured him. many were saved, worse things
diverted.
whycantitEND?Whyisitalwaysadiversion?
Givesyousomethingtodowhenthenextyearcomeswouldbemyguess.
Isupposeitsagoodguess.
Thetrainwasapproaching.Elevenminutes.

itwasagoodfightwhileitlasted.Youdidgoodjohn.
Theyshookhandswhenthetrainpulledup.Itsskeletondriverwaiting.
takeyourrestJohnny.Restforusaswetakeitfromhere.
goodluckHorace.Andillseeyouatthenextone.
godspeed.
godspeed.

Andtwominutesbeforemidnight,thetrainbeginstopullaway.
369

Theend.

postAD:

The ghos~haus will


re-open on the
370

eleventh of January
2008 while
recovery is in
progress. Thank
you for your
patience.

371

AFTERVOLTE
RBOOKS
2009
Aftervolterpress.
InductedJanuaryseventhtwothousandeight.
Principleplatform:editingfacilityforVOLTERGEISTseries.
Editor-in-chief:statusunknown
Location:AFTERVOLTERBOOKS,street07-01.Cityofomandae2008.
Firstcontacts:
MaraLeoro(independent)updatesentencedtoasylum42(reckoningspace)level3.Ish-grant2.0
WritergeistNINE/9(aftervolterbooks)update::2208technologies.Space-timerobotics.

Before:

ThelawgotNINEinaremotelockup,insomesouthwesterndesertacrosstheseaofarghe.Nooneelse
formilesaround.AnearthyAlcatraz.Aduststormwasblowingup,thesunstrippingtheearthofits
372

nutrientswhilefreezingitaftersundown.Therewerenoroadsorpathstothelockup.Justanoceanof
driedsand.NocloudsgavereliefthedayHORATIONPAVLOVvisited.Noexperiencestrangerforthe
threeon-dutyofficialsatthelockup.Theydidntexpectanyvisitors.Thatwastheirfirstcomplacent
mistake.
NINEhadgivenupcallingouttothem,tryingtoexplainthathedidntknowwhatwashappening.That
hedidntknowwhothenakedprostitutewas.Andhedidntknowanythingofseveraldeadprostitutes.
Thecopsalreadydubbedhimamoderndayjacktheripper.Hewasalreadytriedforthedeathsentence.
Nowtheyjustneededtopickhimupandshiphimovertoapropergaschamber.
Thecellwasalwaysdarkfortheybarredthewindowswithwood.NosunhadreachedNINEformonths,
orwasitweeksordays?Hedidnotknow.Timewasalwaysstrangeanddifferentasifadiseasehad
eatenawayhismentalconceptionoftime.

TimegotevenweirderthedayHORATIONPAVLOVcame.

Itwasthecoffeecupsthatvanishedfirst.
heymac!Wherethehellarethecups?
Ikeptemwheretheybelongedsir..

Idontseethem!Lax!Youputthecupswheretheyaintsupposedtobe?
dontyellatmeboss.Maybeourprisonerstoleem.Hurh
notfuckinfunnylax!HowthehellamIsupposedtohavemy

Themaindoorunlockeditselffromtheinside.
Thecaptainstoppedspeakingandturntowardsthedoor.
Itswungopenwiththewind

whatthehell

Amanwasstandingintheframe.Afullgreysuit,cleanshavenhead,about50oddyears.
373

losingtrackofthings?heaskedthestunnedcops.Aduststormwasblowingbehindhim.
Instinctively,theyreachedfortheirholsterstofindtheirgunsgone.Theypanicked.
Isuggestyouboyssitdown.
Oneofthemcamelungingatthevisitorwithachair.
Apieceofthefloorboardrosebythewillofthevisitor.
Thelungingcoptripped,fellfacedownbeforethemanatthedoor.

nowwouldIhavetoforceyoutwodownaswell?heaskedtheothers.Theybackedawayfromhim
slowlyasiflettinghimcomein.oneofthemknockedoverabullet.Thecaptainturnedtoseetheir
bulletsneatlylinedupintworows,formingapathwaytotheoneandonlyholdingcellinthesmall
remoteprison.Asthecopslookedtowardsthecelldoor,itunlockeditself.Itslowlyswungopen.

comeon,ghostwriterthemanyelledtothecelldoorajar,youregoingelsewhere.

Thetwocopshadalreadytakentheirseats.Thethirdonestayedonthefloor.

NINEpeekedoutfromtheopendoor.
letsgolad,nothingtoseehere.

Thecopsa[ppearedstunned,inadazeasNINEslippedpastthemtowardstotheexit.Hefeltatingling
sensationrunuphisbackashepassedtheoldmanatthedoor.

Theoldmanleanedintotellthecops.

Ibelieveyouwillforgethowallofthishappened.Hesaid,thenturnedandwalkedout,themaindoor
afterhim.

374

Anarcolepsytookoverthecops.
AndTheywillwaketofindtheprisonergone.

During:

NINEsleptatthebackofthecaravanasitjourneyedon.Agreatfatiguehadtakenoverhimashewas
exposedtothesun.sleep,now,wastheonlymercy.
Helmedbyhoration,Thecaravandrovewestward,towardstheseaofArghe,back,totheheartofthe
glasscity.
Ninedreams.

TossthecoinintothewellinthehouseofGHOS.Youdonothearithitthebottom.Itspinsendlessly,
likethegriefofghostparents,mourningthelostchild.Likethemotherswholamentedforsaul.
ERCONDUSshavedoffhisbodyhairbeforethewell.Themadguysatinthecornertowatch,naked.
Hewashavinganerection.HelikedERCONDUS.
Hittheoffbuttononthewireless.Disconnect.
Leavenotrace.
Feelthevomitwanttocomeup.Fightit.
Nameyourdemons,eveninmid-fall.
Thebookdealerweptinthecorner,outnumbered.Hehaddreamsofthestarvingboywithbloated
stomach,beingbeatenbyhismaster.Hesawinsectscrawlonwastedfood.Unedible.

Abandonedkitchen.
Hefeelstheruthless,impatientnamelesslovelightup.
375

Afireindarkness,ahymninmadness.

Musicalnote.

Thehermitmovesinto
Subterranea
Lanternlightingtheway,ashockinthebackground

Downslipperyslope.

Bywhosenamearethesewordschanneled?

Whosehistorytotheseprovide?
canyouseethecavepaintings?

Haveyoureadthesigns?

Bythesolidificationofthisworkahead,allinherentmistakes,defiler,blasphemyistobekepttothe
heart,unbroken,un-appealed,readyandwaitinglikeaslave.

Thebookdealerwasweepinginthecorner

Squeezinghisgenitalsinfear

Wettinghimself.
376

yousee?Yusee?Anyhowopenthebook

Liedown.Restthewearyspine.

Theraingrowsheavier,Icanhearitfromhere.
Sticktothefewpeople,everyoneelsecomesandgoes.

ILLIXANDERNORTH

haveyoubeentoamemorylately,rottingarm?

__
NINEwokeup.
______
After:

Horationhadburnmarksonhispalm.Likeastigmata.BythebreakwateroftheArghesea,hesat,tobe
inconference.Thehardrocksbitintohisflesh.Bleedingfromtheanus,theflowingbloodisforminga
circlearoundhim.

Wetsmogrisesformthecracksinthestone,cloudingthehierophant.

Inthesmoke,voicesspeak,takeshimelsewhere,backintohismind,intothetunnel(birthcanal),into
theuniverse.

Behome,inparadise
Behome,inwarcontrol
377

Whoisthen,alive?
Whoisthen,reforme?
Speak.
Whatisyournotion?

NINEistoberenamed.Takesoverthedeadmansshop.
RecallingitAFTERVOLTER.
KeepingplaceoftheVOLTERbooks

Andof
Theresident?
ANCHORMAGIC
inoperation
chainscast
atthehouseofGHOS
newcardstobemixed.
Breaktheseal
1221
Threecards
tobringghos~hausback
mixing:101times
3cardschosen:
Tobringghos~hausback
1227read

378

Cardone
Chariot
Twodistinctforces
Pullingintwodirections
Theredhorse
TheBlackhorse
Thecharioteerisonfire
Card2
Pageofswords
Theknightwiththeblade
Andofthestaff
Uncoveringtheunknown,awaketounknowndangers:
Card3
Twoofpentacles
Changeordifficultprogression.
Thusthefiguresofthecardsdancedinthesmog,enrapturing,formingvisionsonthestage.Themilitary
manisrushingtoapayphoneunderablockofflats.Hishandtrembles,ashedialsthenumbers.His
uniformiscakedwithmudandblood.Hemakesaconnection.
Attheotherendofthelineontheothersideoftheworld,inadesertthecommandingofficerisseeing
tohisarmyofmonsters.
Inthebackground,creaturesarehowling,strappedtoironbedsinasitupposition.Thecreaturesare
whiteoffur,likeabominablesnowmeninthesunscorchedseaofsand.Theyaretrashingasother
militarymenarepreparingthemforbattle.
Hisphonerings.
what?!
sir!theroostertheroosterwasadiversion!
fuckisthis?itsnotthesource?
379

no!itsfromanoth
Cutoff.Deadline.
Arrowsoffirewerescreechingdownlikerain,ithitandburstthroughthealuminumshelters,burning
upthemonstersaretheirfurcaughtfire

Panic.
getemout!Getem

Cutoff.Deathline.
Arrowinchest.Morehowlinginthebackground.Screaming.Humansandmonstersinonecacophonyof
pain.Humanfleshtearing.

Attack.Attack.Diversion.Attacked.
SomethingclawedHORATION::Sarm,breakingthevision.Thethingdraggedhimoffthebreakwater.He
tumbledandrollednakedintothesea,aviolentoutburstoffallingoverrockstearingskin.Hecouldnot
seehisassailant.Hehitthewater,wasdraggedunder.Somethingelsegrabbedhisankle.Ityankedhim
upwards.Pulledintwodirections.

Limbstearingapart.
Aroar.
Ascreamunderwater.Waterturningtoblood.

TORN.

terrible.
ILLIXANDERNORTHstubbedouthiscigaretteintothehalfeatenplateofcoldgreennoodles.
Divinationviawastedfood
380

ThegreatVikinglikewarlordShookhishead,onefuckingdeathafteranother.Whatkindofnewyearis
this?
GREEDA<Hislittlemidgetsexslavechuckledtoherself.
Ahardhailwasbrutalizingthestreetsoutsidethecave.Carwindscreenssmashing.Sidewalksbreaking.
listentothisshitoutside.Hecontinued,Andtheysaytheworldaintending.
itaint!fucktoysorcessessdeclared,shechuckledsomemore,playingwithhernipples.
whattimecanwegetonthefirsttrain?heaskedher.
Shetuckedhersmallhandsintothecrotchofherpantiesandfishedouttheticketsfromaninlining
pocket.intwentythreehours.
damnit.Thatsalongway.
wanttofuckfuck?sheoffered.
Helookedatherwithawhynotface.Tuggedatthechainsaroundhernecktopullhercloser.
Theymadelovetothesoundsofahailstormandchainsbangingagainstbroadsword.

Arobotthingfromtheyear2208foundthecaravanwithnodriver,noapparentsignsoflife.Scanningits
contentsthoughexposedasleepingform.Therobotthingmovedinforinspection.
Avoicecrakledintotherobotstransceiverhaveyoufoundthegirlchild?
NEGATIVE.Unknownsubjectisinvehicle.
inspect.
COMMANDACTIONINPROGRESS.
SHIVASIGHTACTIVATED
Thecaravansexteriorwasremoved,aubatomicallyerasedtoexposetheinsideofthevehickle.The
robotthinginspectedthesleepingform,capturinggridofthebody,measuring,calculatingtheform,the
breath,themovement,thefacial.Crosscheckingwithitsinfinitedatabase,amatchwsmadeinnano
seconds.

SUBJECTIDENTIFIED.
381

FORMELYKNOWNASNINE.ASPECTNAME:WRITERGEISTNINE.HUMANLIFEFORM.PRIORSERVANTOF
OMANDAE.
retrievesubject.

COMMANDACTIONINPROGRESS.

LCDscreensinthecomputerroomcircledNINEashelayonthetatamimat.Thebuzzofthemonitors
lulledhimfromhiscomatose.Hewoketofacesonthescreen.Maskedmen,compactdisceyes.
Barcodesformouths.//happyreturn.//Theysaidinunison.Disorientationhithimashetriedtositup.
//nottoofastoryoullbedizzy//thefacessaid.Im..youre.where.
//itsok,youarelost.Thisis2208.Wewelcomeyou.//
2208?
//yearofthemachine.//
future?How?
//how?//
NINEsatupslowly.Organictubeswererunningintohisbody.He\panickedandthemachinesseemed
tounderstand.Itpumpedstrangeliquidsintohimtocalmhimdown.//relaxbrotherNINE.Besafe
here.////hewhohaslivedonthefringeescapesallmannerofdeathfromthecentre//theyechoed.
IdontwhatshappeningIcantunderstand
//others,likeyouare/arewaking,moreothersyetdidnotmakeit.///saddeaths.Manyafunerals//be
outofcycle//takeyououtofcyclenow//littlewhile.Besafehere//

Themonitorscircledhimagain,lightscamedownfromabove,runningoverhisbody.Hesawimageson
hisskinforming.Hieroglyphs.

//motherbutterflycallsus.Besafe.Restagain//
Thelightsshroudedhim,takinghissightintoawhitelightthatwasntblindingbutcomfortingblank,
takenawayintoawhitezone.

382

____

Thinwhitesheetsglowedandsuspendedintheair;thinwhitesheetsfloatingslowlyaroundawhite
room.Theglowingbutterflyrodeonthelightsin.wingsabruptlystoppedflutteringandsuspended,it
driftedlikeinspaceinsynchronocitywiththesheets.Somesheetsbeganblinking,glowingdimand
bright,atdifferentspeeds.

|communication|direction|
Whitelightspassedoverhead.
Threewhitescreenswereraised
Thenonthem
Threesigils

Theprimordialtriangleoffire.Theonethousandonehundred.ThevaultofM

Thencameuponthewhitelightabove
Thesigilof
XL
6XXL
383

X



384



Thus come the break of cycle
Omandae, come, in aton of odar
Thus come omandae process
Doth halt the girl of oro.

Becausesheisasylumd
Thusnotopentodata
Decommissioningshallbestatus
385

accordingly

By whom doth the writ of?


Itisnotofthegirl
it0is0of090level0two0doth0writ

who doth be the first FAEDEM



0Ghos~Haus0
Ghos~Haus
Who doth the completion run?

MonroeMonroeMonroewhoismadwhoiscoma.

Thus Wake him.


386

YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

Monroesreturn

MadMonroesleptforfifteennights.Onthesixteenth,thestarsfell.Itluredhimoutof
comatoseintoadarkenedroom.Hewasacutelystiff,uninspiredandheavylikebricksona
thinstretcher.Hewantedtodi,notwake.Hewantedeternalblankrest.Hecouldhearthe
clocktickingthoughhethoughthisearshadbeenbadlydamagedfromthescreamofthe
demons.Histhroatwasparchedbutnottornfromshoutinginvocationsandwarnings.A
headachewasbuildingupwithhisreturntoconsciousness.Hedidntfeellikeheresteda
day.
Heturnedslowlyinbed,lettinghisbonescrackandclickbackintothemovementoflife.He
feltforhisbloodpumping,feltforthecursecoursingthroughhisveins,wonderinghow
longitllbebeforeherequiredanentirebottleofalcoholtocounterthepoisonpumping
formhisblackenedheart.Hestretchedslowly,notwantingtopayattentiontohismind
thatwasalreadywanderingovertheeventsofdireNovemberandDecembersdoom.He
triednottorecallthehorrorsetchedonthefacesoftheyounggirls.Allelevenofthem,
nowprobablysafealthoughhedidntknowhowmanyofthemwereleftsane.Wasdeatha
preferreddoorovermadness?Hedidntquitewishtothinkofblackphilosophiesanddark
questions.Heturnedagaininbedthenslowlygotup,tryingnottotriggeroffadizziness
afterlyingdownformorethantwoweeks.Hefelttheenvironmentinthedarkforhis
ghostchildbutshewasnotpresent.Hesatupinbedcontemplatinghisreturntolife.

387

OntheEighthday,Godcreatedthesecretworlds.

In2008,Eightchildrenbegantodiscoverit.

Theyarethesecretchildrenandthisistheirstory.

388

Onthe22
nd
day,balloonswerefallingfromthe
skyinTHEFIELD>
Severaldeathshipswerepresent,approaching
thewhitemountain.Theballoonspartedforthe
shipstopass.

Farbelowuponburntfields,DECORUSthethird
walkswithasmallgirl.HernameisALICE>

Iamthankful,DECORUSsaidtothegirl,forcomingtomeatsuchatime.
thereisntanywhereelsetogo,IcannotfinduncleSAUL.
Shesoundedsad.
thatsalright.Hecomesandgoes,whatsimportantiswhatyouwanttodonext.
389

Theycontinuedwalkingoncrispdeadground.
Imveryconfused,aboutallofthis.
manyareconfused,evenIamnotsuremyself.Decorusdeclared.
whymustitbesocomplicated?
whenthesecretworldsbegununfoldinginreality,itsalwayshardtounderstand
because.well,itsnotourreality.Thesethingstakestime,understandingthemImean.
thenIguessthatiswhatIwanttodonext.Tounderstand.
areyousure?
Shedidntthinkaboutitforverylongbeforeshenoddedherheadandsaid,Imoneofthe
secretchildrenright?
Decorusnoddedhis.
thenIthinkitsmydutytostarttryingtounderstand.
Decorusstoppedtoturntoher.youreabravegirlALICE,youruncleandyourfatherwill
beproudofyou.
Shelookedtotheground.ImscaredIhaveangeredmyfather.
hewillunderstand.
Shenoddedherhead,ItrustyouuncleDECORUS.
Hesmiledandstrokedhersmallheadwithhismagickalhand,thankyou.
Shesmiledbackathimandtookadeepbreath.sowhatnow?
yougobacktoearth.AndyoufinduncleMonroe.Hepointedtothemountain,youllhave
towalkalonetothatmountainandwhenyoureachit,youllfindacave.Gothroughthe
caveeventhoughyoumaybescared,andkeepwalkingstraight.Youllcomeoutintheend,
howlongImnotsosurebutyouwillbesafeandyouwillcomeoutattheendtofindadoor
thatleadstounclemonroesroom.Thingswillbeginfromthere.
Shepausedtodigestalltheinformationthenasked,butwhatdoItellhim?
youtellhimALTER-VOLTERbegins.Hewillunderstand.
areyousure?
390

youtrustmerightdarling?
Shesmiled.okthen.
ok.
Theyhugged,longandtightthenDECORUSwatchedlittleALICEwalktothemount.The
deathshipspartingforherpassage,themirrorwaitingattheotherendofthecave,long
afterthedarknesshadtakenher.
ForsheisInfiniteAlice,thesecretchildofmirrors.

BREAKFASTATMADMONROES

Thecoffeeshopmenwereguffawingat5am.Drunkonbeerandnuts.MONROEsteadilytreadedthe
roadside,togetmoreicefromthestore.Hisswiggingofthebottlejustdidntdoanyjusticewithoutice.
Hisstomachwasblated,headstillheavy,musclesstillstifffromsleepingsolong.Hisbladderwas
contractingandheneededtopissoutthepoisonedblood.Hereachedthecoffeestorejustasthemain
bulkofalcoholtookholdofhissystemandstartedworkingitsritual.ehmadcop!Longtimenoseeeh?
Wahahahah!thecoffeeshopownersfriendslaughedalongsidetheirchief,notatMonroebutwithhim
fortheyallconsideredthemselvesmadashell.getmesomeice,oldfogIneedtopeeoutmyblood.
younastymadcop!Wahahahah!Nastyfucker!MONROEStumbledintothedirtywastedloo.Paused
beforethemirror,hestaredathisheavilybeardedface,fatiguewrittenalloverit.Fatiguefromthe
sleep,fromtheterrorsofDecember,thedirenessofNovember.Themirrorstartedfoggingashestudied
thebloodshoteyesstaringback.Hefirstthoughthewasbreathingtoohardintothemirrorbuts
omehowhesawthatthefogwasbuildingfromtheothersideofthemirror.Itstartedtoturnblackand
dark.Intothemirrorhesawlightforminginthedistance,thenashapeofagirlmeltedformthelight.
ThegirlstartedrunningtowardsMonroe.Atfirstglance,hethoughtitwashisghostchildbutitdidnt
feltlikeher.Thisgirlhadadeeper,older,almostinfinitefeelwhichhealmostlosthimselfin.he
maintainedconsciousness,thegirlrancloser,shelookedlikeshehadabrightsundresson.Everything
suddenlyslowed,shelookedlikeshewastrippingforward,herleftarmraisingasifreachingoutto
Monroe.Instinctivelyheputhisleftpalmflatuponthemirrorssurface.Thegirltouchedhim.
Inhale.
Likeathunderbolthewasthrownback,crashingintotheunrinal.Acubicledoorthatwasopened
slammedshut.Asherecoveredfromthefall,hesawthatthegirlinthemirrorwasgone.Everythingwas
backtonormalexceptfromthesoundofagirlsobbingbehindcloseddoors.

391

THEFIELD>

DECORUSfollowedthepathofthebonfires.
Movingdownhillinthenight
FartowardsSLUTTERGUT.
InsearchofthetransvestiteentityRAYZORIA,themother-nurseofGHOS~HAUS

eh..thecoffeeshopprincesaidtohisfriends,whoisthisgirlmadcopbringingout?
Theyallstaredandwatchedhim,followinghimasheehadedtothecounterwiththegirlintow.Heput
fivegoldcoinsonthecounter.thanksfortheice.Hesaidcoldlyandleft.Hisfacealittleshaken.
madcop?Youarrestingsmallgirl?Stealingherfornaughtyends?
nothingofthatsortoldman.Shesafriend.
youngfriendyouhave.Tooyoungmaybe.
yourbusinessiscoffeeandice,notwhatIdowithwho.Imoff,dontdrinksomuch.

MonroeleftwithALICEaccompaniedbymadlaughterfromthecoffeeshopinthemorningsun.

ROOM2208

Themachinesof2208hoveredoverthenakedformofNINE.Hisheadhadbeencleanlyshaved,blue
lightlikelaserswerestudyingthesurfaceofhisskull.Aholographicmindoperationwasabouttobe
initiated.AseriesofmapsofsigilstobeimprintedupontheconsciousnessofNINE.THEFIELDwas
buildingitsfirstscribesayer,INEN-PRIME.TomineandchannelthehistoricalmemoryofTHEFIELD.

392

InthewardofRAYZORIA

,anakedghos~hausislyingonaslab,anoversizedtombstone.Thetransvestiteisholdingalongblack
screwdriverlikedevicewithaneedlesedge.Thedeviceisattachedtotubesrunningtoaboilingvatof
blackflowersspeciallyadministeredtoamidgetalchemistinagasmask.DrRAYZORIAistattooingthe
sealsofATONOMANDAE&ODARabovethesealsofVAULT-M,1000.100andtheredtriagleonthe
chestoftheunconsciousmagician.Hewillwaketoanewcreationinhisconsciousness.Hewillawaketo
beasorcererofTHEFIELD.Hisjourneywouldbetoexorcizethefieldofitsblackdemons,thealien
symboiteholdingalllifehostage.
Thescoreceror,Jar-darispreparinghisspecimendoorwaydruqfortheODARage..
WE ARE CLOSE
A group of messiahs called the bloated men have crossed into our space-
time continuum with a warning.
The age of ODAR is coming. Evolve before the beginning is nigh.

Army barracks 17.
Deep jungle
393

trauma.Minus 129
men.no more
gunshots.
HELLO!!.!echoes through an empty barrack. PORO the clown flip flops
through the grey camp. Empty and haunted. Apparently. motehrfuckers!
echoes again, motherfucker bouncing back to PORO in singular instead. This
freaks him out a little but PORO is strong,. He removes a ball from his pocket.
Tennis. Tosses it across the hall. It lands, bounces, tok tok tok toktoktok.
Breaks a mirror. Shattering shards.
A sound from the far end. Urghhh. A moan. PORO calls out. you here man?!
no more echoes.
Ugh.
PORO flops faster to the corner. He hears his friend.
the other worlds fucked up. His friend says to PORO as PORO comes into
view. The man is crippled and on the floor. A giant arrow in his chest.
Chicken feathers at the end. what the fuck man PORO says in shock, falling
to his knees by his friend. listen, clown friend coughs blood. ACK!
listen! You ever see gates broken in the wind? Chains clanging on rusted
steel, both sides of the fence empty?
I
desertion! Desecration! Their fucked up world is moving into our fucked up
world. Its all fucked up now blood coughing.
394

WHO ASHCROW?! Who is they?! I bring dokteer with balloon?
no, no, no need. Listen! Clown.youll walk for days and see nothing. The
sun will never set when you want it to. You want to drink sand but youre too
bloated with water. Youll walk far and find nothing.yet COUGH cough. A
tone shifts in the room. PORO notices it.
a small desire, a triumphant elephant! PORO! I have seen the bookVOLTER
GHOST..I have read parts of itVOLTERGEISTlook at me now.
\ASHCROW was dying. A crippled death.
He continued,its a god damn nightmares. Its coming out from big holes in
the earth,COUGH
Ack!
ASHCROW, the crippled, dies in the arms of PORO, the clown.
A tone shifts. PORO hears helicopters in the air.


have you contained the area? the commander asks.
yes sir!
and the clown?
in quarantine sir.
good. Time to Bring out the spirits. I want to know what happened here.
Ill get TOMAS, sir.

TOMAS sits alone by a dark well behind barrack 17. Hes adjusting his black
lacy glove. His long feminine fingers holds a slim gold cigarette. His hand is
trembling slightly.
395

His long, tight black dress clings too suffocatingly in this jungle heat. He
can smell blood everywhere and unrestful spirits. The seargeant is approaching
shim with apprehension. umm..madam Tomasthe lieutenant says/
I know... He cuts him off, sweetheart. Im coming. She squirms in
her small wooden seat , exhaling a lustful moan of smoke from a final puff.
Crushes out the cigarette into a used tampon before him. And orgasms like a
shivering horror, as if it was the most disgusting emotion.
time to raise the dead.
__


there will be memory in the cells that are still dying, the transvestite
necromancer said as she stood before the body of ASHCROW. excuse my methods,
he said to the leuitenant and his men as they watched. TOMAS slid his hand up
along the long slit of his black dress, tugged down his black lacy g0string
and squatted over the dead man;s face. wakey, wakey. She said as he
rubbed his castrated clit on the dead mans lips. As strange slime squirted
in to the slightly parted dead lips, TOMAS quickly slid his crotch down and
placed his head with flowing black hair onto the mans chest. She was
listening to the cells.
Almost immediately,m she was thrown off the body, backing away like a
terrified cat then suddenly regaining his composure, on the floor, staring
ahead at the body that seemed to scare her. He focused. what a bizarre
thing. She said. a killer and his monster pet rooster.
what? the lieutenant said. Some of the other men scoffed.
A small terror began growing on the transvestites face.
Under his breath, its still here
She jumped up, GET OUT! GET OUT! GO NOW! started running, TAKE THE
CLOWN< GO! moving out of the hall, some men panicked, moved with her, the
lieutenant seemed to be getting angry, what the HELL IS GOING ON TOMAS
396

GET THE FUCK OUT NOW!
The roof stared crushing down, all uniformed men fled.
The whole barrack is crushing. By invisible giant claws. Doors windows bricks
walls ripping. The ground shaking. Tomas still shrieking, EVAC! EVAC!
TOMAS sees the quarantine camp. TAKE THE CLOWN NOW! GO! EVAC! EVAC!
Uniformed men rushing to copters. Blades beginning to propel. The g round on
which the barrack is built is sucked in or crushed down it is hard to tell.
TOMAS turns to face the oncoming unseen menace. She pulls a long sharp blade
from her high stiletto boots. Flips her slit skirt aside, appears to begin
stooping slightly, then without mercy
She stabs the blade up her rectum. And twists. Grimacing in pain and pleasure.
A distorted orgasm escaping the crossdressers black painted lips. Eyes
screwed shut.
The blades of he choppers growing more violent.
She pulls the blade out as fast as she jammed it in. with her ungloved, corpse
colored hand and red painted nails, she buried her fingers into the bleeding
mess. Collects the blood. Then strikes the ground with it.
The rotors are in full blast, a whirlwind of dust storms violently. Jabbing
the dry earth with bloodied fingers, she draws a line with the blood. The
holes breaking out in the floor signaling the march of the rooster stopped
before the line.
FUCKING GO! tomas yelled back to the filled copters now almost ready for
take off. her eyes rolled back into her head then She spat out some curses
towards the invisible thing before her.SHe began limping towards the third
chopper ast he first two began their ascent. The red line in the sand fizzled
out, invisible claws crossed over and the crushed earth kicked up dirt att he
loss of its prey. The choppers rose and escaped in to the western sun.
what in gods fuck was THAT?! the commander yelled overt he blades to
TOMAS>
397

I dont know darling. Came the slow reply, but I bet mister clown over
there knows more...he looks to the giant blue plastic box at the clown
huddled in the corner, weeping.telling its sick rotated jokes.


dont mind if me smokes. The clown pulls his red flower out of hi
szpocket, the stem long and red. With his yellow gloved fat hands, he makets
he shape of a scissor and cuts off the lower end of the stem. He tucks the
red cigarette like thing into his mouth, uses his red lips to turn the stick
up to his nose then he pinkes his nose once making a horn sound and a flame
flicks out of the nose dead straight. The clown lights his stick,. That was
some nasty magic back there. He said to the transvestite sitting before him
outside the quarantine cube. I bet yor emore freak than me.
She ignored his remarks, you got a name sweetcheeks?
Im PORO< the clown. From carnivale de odar. Clown paused, took another
puff. The stick seemed to be expanding intoa cigar. you ever heard of us?
TOMAS kept silent a little then said, my father has.
The clown raised an eyebrow,you father has seen much.
what were you doing in barrack seventeen?
trying to save a friend from the war.
the war was over three months ago. We were going in to find the last
company.
oh no. not that kind of war. neither of your kind. Nor of mine. But does it
matter now sinsei? The war has already taken him...
what do you speak of? she leaned in closer.
oh. you know. Your father knows. Has he not told you?
TOMAS remains silent again. Listening inside him.
398

he will not speak of it.
then theres nothing we can do can we? Ifr the elders dont speak, who are
we to act?
what is this PORO? Whats happening?
this isjust absurditys tip. Monster roosters and bloated men.
That caught the attention of TOMAS.
bloated men?
sure. With strange signs on their bald heads.
Tomas got up, walked towards the cube.
tell me of those men
you have dreamt of them too havent you?
More assertive.tell me about them.
ASHCROW knew more. I just heard stories. That the messiah is grotesque.
Used to be from this world. Now, some kind of god. They say hell return
again. Then vanish again. Then return again. The always returning. Fourth,
fifth coming, it goes on and on until its all really over.
whats over?
the world. This universe. Reality Over.NEXT STAGE. The clown shifts his
weight off the wall. Walks to the transvestite.
its getting uglier. crazier. A lot more disgusting and potent. Worse than
calamaties, tragedies, massacres. It gets real fucked up I heard.
who do you hear this from?
the people. from all sorts of worlds and lives. Those who come to the
carnival to find justice, answers, hope.they tell us things.those form the
future, they speak of things to come. ASHCROW was one of them. He needed our
help.to stop something. The clown shook his head sadly. Now hes gone.
But More of his kind will come to us. Mother says so. But more will also be
399

gone. Its all going to shit really. We need more than ourseleves. Lots
more.he stubbs his cigar out on his big red flip flop boots. Stares back at
TOMAS with the weariest face a clown could wear.a silence hangs between them,
a silence like a punctuation, a state of ungrace where nothing else said could
change the tone of the evening. This was just the beginning of things. A door
opening far behind TOMAS breaks the silence. A man in uniform calls out to him.
sorry to interfere but the lieutenant needs you now, madam.
I know. Tomas said, getting up, leaving the clown in his quarantine cube.
PORO watches him go, A clown smile breaking on his face. I see now. I
see.this is our next act. He nods his head.

youve been reassigned. The commander told TOMAS as he entrered the room.
There were two elder men in suits in the room.these gentlemen will brief you
on yoru way out of here.
what? Wait. I just gotten
its an override. I just got off the red phone. Go TOMAS. The first table
needs you.
That was a big enough name to drop. The first table. A kind of united nations
for x-file cases. TOMAS shook his head. More in resignation than in defiance.
lets go. He told the two men.

there are several criticals we need you to look into. A burning haus
scenario. Mr WU and his consorts.kiled. Elijah Monroe. One of ours. missing.
Theres a gaping hole where a magickal authority used to be. We need you to
find out whats going on in the glass city.
fine. I can do all t his for you. But I too need my resources.
name it.executive will provide.
I need the clown PORO with me. Hes under quarantine here.
The two elder men thought in silence.
400

it is done.











manissadathisworld.themaddog
stealsunderwear.Firecrackersinthe
distance.Manhasshothimselfinhis
history.

Theparrot-dogswerediscoloredand
aged.Mostwereonalimp,tailburnt
401

out.Theykeptspeakingaboutholesin
thesky,holesintheground.All
openingup.andsuchblacksmoke




Attention STATUS UNKNOWN. Attention, STATUS UNKNOWN.


THE STRANGE POSESSION OF ANSLEM

BLANKMACHINEMAJESTA
ThunderedREDbethebitchtimeofpostearthghosttime.Halfhowledmoondisfiguredhourofbreath
amen.Soultornstruckthetowerofghosttime.Speakkingsdispoweredwrath,floodingendndingghost
timeforgetting.Hoursbefinaljudgement.Penetrate.Thunderedbeblankmachinemajestabe.
Forwardfields,untowhicharcformationwombone.Motherbesafety,structuralhandrail.Fromabove
likemountain/tower.Breedingtime,butskiesbemensus,eveningtimeallowingshortchangeddepravity.
Launchnexussixteen.Alacartedystopia.Stompinggroundelephantsunrise
Heavyrotation.

Theagentthensaid,wereasecularnationmisterMonroe...hetookhistimespeakingfromhissuit,
wecannotallowrampantmagickalphenomenaoccurringinpublic.Allthewhile,detectiveMonroe
justlistens,hisheartcravingformorecoldwhiskey.theFIRSTTABLEhasassuredmasterminister,
402

everythingwillbeundercontrol.HestopedpacingaroundMonroelikeawolfandstandsbeforehim.
Doyouunderstand?MisterMonroe?

ANCHORAND
Existed,thenappearedinadescendingelevator.Downdownbelow.Openingtopresentearth.Relieved
toseesunlightheexitsthemetalboxwombintolife.

THEMASSCONFESSIONOFRAYZORIATHEWITCH.

Iwouldvedonemoreforher.Lovedhermore,buticouldnt.thedarknightofbeforehadclaimedme.
Inthestarkheartbeforesunrise,longaftermidnight,inthatdesperatetwilighthour,Suchblackmenace
arrived.Cold,brutalwinds,un-rained;aloststormstolemeinsleep.Returned,criminald,Icannot
remaintobewithherinthesun.Iwouldvedonemore,ifIcould,butIamcrimed,blasphemied,in
surrendertothereal,twistedsoul.Eventhenightwillnotbesafeforher,ifIwasnear.Abandonedbe,
leavingherwithsleep,Idepart,tobehaunted,hunted,obscuredwithmydemons.

Ifyouhavetobeginthistalewithme,Ifirstaskforyourforgiveness.
ThecrimesIvecommittedinthelifebeforethisone,aresevereasyouwillsoonseeforyourself.Iam
nowcalledRAYZORIAinthislifebutbeforethis,Iwasknownaslegraheg.

Sarrogheitus.
themindisafigmentoftheimagination.-LordAnon.

Thegreatsexmonsterdeitywasdead
butitsheartwasthrillinglyalive.
Pumpingbloodintoanotherworldofmeatandblackflowers,givinglifetoaborteddreamers.
403

Inthepoolofpiss,itsfishesswam,rediscoveringecologyandevolution,thedirtofmankindandwaste
Throughthetrenchesofvomit,thesoldiersmarched,tothedreamofbeatingheart,Sarrogheitus.
Thegorysoundtrackleadsthemfromdeath.
Thedroneandthesilencedigesttheirsouls.
-fromthesongofsarrogheitus.

thewholeofcreationispregnantwithmysteries.Barbarajohn.
From the anger of saint luscious by padre john liera

Coldisthedeadnight,alifelessmoon,disassociatedstars.
Redisthegashintheskybleeding.Blackareitsshores.

Mudandoilandbloodcomingling.

Angrywasthewomanwhogaveuslife.
Rapedbebelovedgaia,
wombaccursedwiththestructuresofsteel
SEX betheslimewedehydrated
Parchedwereherlands,stolenherseas.
Darkbethegrimeofherwaters
Deadbeherbellyoffish
Softvaginahardenedbyconcrete
404

Fleshcutbyrazorsandmachines.
Stolenbetherocksofhermoon
Mindless,betheviolenceofherguests
Sadbehershavenhills.
Soiledbeherbeautysbest.
SoKillus.
Lostconscience.
Mudandoilandbloodbeliving
Thefruitofherwomb,rotting.

asickman,diaries.
Smallpiecesofash
Blackened,peelsoffthebed.
Thebugshadescaped,sotherewasnothinglefttoeat.
Thesoresaregettingworse.
Verylittlebloodwasleftintheporcelainmug,theoldstainsnowbadlystainingthewhite.
Idrankalittlefromtheremains,feltthesludgecrawldownmythroat.
Thetasteofrusthittingmehard(likelickingoldmetalladdersatplaygrounds)
Iverunoutofcigarettesand
Katiewouldntbebackforatleasttwomoredays.
Death,thepromotion,couldveclaimedmebythen.
nakedfeelersnakedfeelersItslikethat
Voicesreturn,withthepain.Istrugglefirsttofindreferencetothenakedfeelers.
405

ThenIfumblearoundformedication.
Post-occult-murder(unknownof)
itsstillquiteahorriblewaytokillsuchayounggirl.
ThegolemsaidtoVoltaire.
Iambutahorribleman,hismasteranswered.
Theysatnakedaroundthedinnertable,smokingblackcigarsinthedark,asthestenchofdecomposing
bodiesfromupstairsbegantotakeholdbelow.
maybeitstimetogothegolemsaid.
whysoearly?voltairsoundedunhurried,casuallysmoking,tappinghisstomachlikeafteragoodmeal.
afraidtokillsomefirstresponders?
therewasonlysupposedtobeone.
buttheresthreeupthereanyhow,whatsafewmore?hesoundedandlookedcalm.
Thegolemwasexpiring.master,weshouldgo.
Thenavoiceinterrupted.
orarrogancewillbethedeathuponyou.
ohmyteasedvoltair,unworried,anintercession.
Iamnoangel.Saidthevoice.
Voltairlaughed,andyourecertainlynotoneofthosedevilseither.Illknow.Iammasterofsomeof
them.Voltairturnedtowardsthevoice,whatsyournamelittlecreature?heaskedasheturned.

Thehorrorthatstruckhimwasblackandmenacing.
Diasablinghimhissenseofsafety
Exposinghimtogutturalfright
Oftwistedorgansinthenightmareroom.

406

reprimandissance

SoIaskedthemonster,youletVoltaireescape?
onlywithverylittlewitsleftImafraid.Deathwouldbetooeasyforhim.
thatsnasty.Hespissinghimselfnowainthe?
hellhavetocollectthepissinabottleanddrinkittostophisrecurringpanic.
doublenasty.
hedeservedit.AfterwhatNicolewentthrough.
yeahsorryboutnic.
shellhaveaspecialplaceinthemyth.Shesasecretchildtoo.She;llbegreater,eventhanbothofus.
isthatwhyVoltairekilledher?
Themonsterponderedaboutthisforamoment,no.notexactly.Hewasmoreofapuppet.Akindof
priestforahigherpowerthoughhedidntknowit.Hewasused.
soherrealkillerisnotyetkilled?
notyetmyboy.
Wethenjustsatthereinsilence.DontknowwhatwasonthemonstersmindbutIwasthinkingabout
themyth.Aboutomandae.Aboutthesecretchildren.
Thetrainforthecitywillnotbeheretiillmorn.ThereistimeforsleepanddreamsbutIchoseto
explorethetallfields,where,accordingtothemyth,blackcobra-menlived.Ijust,maymeetoneof
them.
excusemeIsaidtothemonster,andpickedupbyglassoficedwhiskey.Imgoingforawalk.
dontletthembiteyouthemonstersaid.
Iknow,
BINARY,BED,BREAKFAST
itisthemonstersthatconjurethesorcerers.

407

Thesystemswokeusfromthecryo-labs.Thedomefixtureadjacentto2208,wheretheykeptthe
writingmanfromearth.Weweretoldthatnurserayzoriaisattendingamagicmanincoma-death,
downatthecamphospital.Itappearsthatshecannotdecidewhichdimensionheshouldbelongto.As
wewoke,thesystemsfloodedourmemorieswiththingspast,thesurgingofarmageddicseasons,the
lossoftwomoresecretchildren.onewastakenbythediabolical/onewastakenbythesea.The
parallelismsaremoredistorted.Wewokeuptothestaticofconfusion.
Thesystemsremainedthetubesinourarms,lang-coilsofstring,ahurtinoutjaws.Thesystemswaxed
ourmuscles,assuredournakedness.thetransferenceintheveinsareirreversibletheytoldus.Shaved
bodyonebyonewerose.
Thesystemsgaveusplant-lifeforadaptations.Mechanicalbreathing,maintainingasteadyrhythm.
theythoughtusaboutpallidskinandrichemotion.Theyletusvisitthewritingmanin2208,thoughhe
didnotwaketomeetus.(thepaincomesandgoesinourheads)thescreensmadeuswatchthem.
Visionsofgrandfatherintheskies.Theancestorastronautandillion.Wepaidourrespectstothe
transfigurationfromwombtoroomtopalewitness.Thespacesuitsheldspecialmemoriesforus,like
anainfantileprojection,likechildhoodyearnings.Seeded.Blooming.
Twistingbackourlimbson,thepetridishmachinescollectedoursamples.
Awaking98%
Whenthesystemawokeus,theyrecalledinusplasticandmetal.Theydidnotforgoourskins,theygave
usfleshandbone.C.R.I.B
Completerestinbed.
Andonthethirddaythesystemrosetheintelligenceofthewheel.Insectoidzodiacprogrammerunning.
Processing
Yearoftheearthworm
Yearofthecockroach
Yearoftheeel
Yearofthespider
Yearofthelocust
Yearofthemantis
Yearofthebeetle
Yearoftheandroid
Yearofthevirus
408

Yearofthemaggot
Yearofthescorpia
Yearofthewraith.
Processingended.

Thesystemreturnedustothewombs.

Ontheeighthday,thesystemreset.Reboot.Reemergence.
AndOnthelastday,inbaptismofodar.
Thesarrogheitusprogramwasinitiated.

Coldroomhospitalfloors.Whenwerosetoasuitableheight,throughtheglasswindows,thesystemlet
uslookoutside.Therewereold50sAmericancafsabouttoramshackle.Whitewoodenwalls,there
wastraditionalBBQwithmeats.HomemadeApplepies,coffeeandteaandcocoa.Icecreamsundaes
werebroughtoutonweekends.Freeflowofflatsodawater.Burgers.Fries.Milkshakesonholidays.
Insidewerethesurvivors,milling.CarryingBottlesofpost-apocalypsegenitaliainyellowliquid,thelast
chanceforreproduction.Alltheyneededwerereceptaclesbutmostofthemweredriedup,toolatefor
dyingonthedryshores.Themudcouldnotbringthembacktolife.
Duringphasetwo,thesystemshowedusthemirrortoourinsides.Theyexplainedoursystems,our
regulationsandwiresandveinsandorgans.Theyshowedus,ingraphandgridformat,howwere
evolving,manufacturing,howtheclockofalgrowrhythmsworkedaccordingtotherunofsarrogheitus.
Theprogramalreadytakingonalifeofitsown.Ontheseconddayofthenewrun,thesystemshowed
usthelights,stolenfromabove,frombelow,stolenfromthedreamsofdeadgods.Theyshowedus
histories.Ruins.Paraphernalia.
Onthenewseventhday,thesystemdrewmapsonoursouls.
409

Processing,thesystementereditssecondstateofshutdown.Responding.Rehabilitate.Givingusback
tothewombs.

Onthethirdweek,weroseagain.Fertilizersfreshinthesun.thefireofsarrogheituskeepingthewound
warm.Utensilsclashinthehallofourminds.Awake.Sarrogheitusexpels.Tocommencefinalrun.The
programandthesystemgreetedus.Welcomedusback./wehavegivenyouyourdreammasters/said
thesystem.LEDlights.Theycametobringussights.Raised,wesawpastthecafs.
Beyonduswerefootnotesandgravestars.Aprocession,adjourned,tooterrifiedofthecreation.They
buriedthebookofourmakersinthefields.Thesystemletusfreeafterthelastanddireinstallation.
Robotparent,attemptingweep,turningthechildrenlooseintothegrids.Thegreensearchoftheradar
mapmissedus,shapedus.theA.Idesigned,thetracksoftheirtears,tobegoneintohybridsunsets.
Thenthesystem,atlast,gaveusahearttoscream.
GOLEMSandtheshiftingpeople.

Ihadauctionedforthegolempair,whenIsawthemattheexhibition.Theywerestronganddurable
buthumorless.Theyhelpedmemoveintheshelvesduringthefirstdaysofthestore.Therewasnorent
tobepaidintheabandonedhalf-demolishedbuilding.Themastertenantwasafraidofthegolems.Their
baldheadsandtwistedfacesscaredhimthemost.theylovebooksItriedassuringthelandlord.He
leftmethekeysandleftinapalepanickedhurry.Whoevertenantwasleftcouldrunonwhatever
powerthatsurgedthroughdailyfromtheexcesspointsoutsidethetornneighborhood.Prettymuchleft
aloneexceptforthecustomers.Intothesecondhalfoftheweek,thepairhelpedmebringinthebooks
fromthewarehouse.Deadgrandfatherwastakingbackthestoragehall.itstimetostartwritingyour
books.Hesaidatthewreathinghour.ItwastimeIhadtomoveout.Onthefifthday,mysleepingand
restingfurniturecame,withthesmalleatingtableandanoutmodedfootmassagingsexdoll.The
golemshelpedarrangethebooksovertheweekend.Iimprisonedmyselfinthestorelikeabusygod,
notevenrestingontheSabbath.Thestoresignwascominginontehninth.Ihadtobeready.
Imadespecialarrangementsfortheinstruments.Ontheeightday,theycame.Thegolemshidwhen
thetwodeliverymencame.Theysaidtheyhadtakenoverthemythofalbu&chung.Theirsignwasnot
red,butblue.Theirtrucklongerandbiggerandolderthanthelast.Thesetwoweremorepowerful.The
golemswereafraidofthem.

WARNINGSONTHEWALL
Themythicalenvironmentforthesecretchildrenhasbeendestabilized.Twoarealreadydead.A
makeshiftstructuremustbeputintoplace
410

THENEXTONETHATWRITESTHEBOOK,ISCONSTRUCTEDASPROGRAAM.

DJANGOSBOAT.
Goddamnpiecesooffish.Theygaveustheplaypen,todesignouruniverse.Andthatcameoutallwrong.
DJANGOwrunghishands.
Nearbitoffmearm,swordfighting/writingoneatthat.Shitfish.
Hespatglobuleonhishand.Sizzledclosingthewound.
Fuckingwritinghandyouhadtohurt.Bitchfish!
stopgrumblingweeddjango,orIllcapsizeyou.Saidtheboat.Notallfishesarebad.
Cantwegoanyfasterwoodchuck!?
Iamsepriummodel165.Idonotanswertowoodchuck.Andifwegoanyfaster,wellendupina
typhoonthatwillhitsixhoursahead.Wemustkeepourtimetoseven.Thenyouwillbealive.
Alrightalright.Gotmeguilty.Takethetimeasyouneed.
Helookedoutaroundtotheinfiniteseas.YouretheonlyoneIvegotanyway.
Theytravelledalittlelongerinsilence,thenDJANGoaskedtheboat,inatonemostserious.
whathappenedintheglasscityagain?seasickwasgettingtohim.
Mnyboatswerecapsized.Manyislandssunk.Manypeoplegone.
Djangoleanedbackintheboat.Dugoutonemoreofhislastfewjointsandlitit.Tossingthematchstick
totheblackforeverseas.
Justasthecountspromisedhuh?Heresignedtothetravelling.Asthecountshavesaid,camethereply.
Ohmy,whathavewehere,saidDJANGoashecameacrosstheseeminglyabandonedfishingtrawler.
Ithoughtwewereinghosttime,boat,whatisthisdoinghere?
Itisnotinmyexpectedcourseofjourneytoencounterthis.
Aphantomship?
Idonotsenseany
AHH!DJANGOscrambledtotheendoftheboat,terrifiedatwhathesawonthetrawler.
411

Amanwithlongflowingblackhair,holdingaswiftsilverkatana.LikeaChineseswordfighter.
whodothsailsnearstatus_unknown?!Ifyouhaveaweapon,revealittome!
Notarmed!Imnotarmed!DJANGOterrified,handsraisedinsurrender,helookedintotheboat.
Boat?Areyouarmed?
WHOAREYOUTALKINGTO!
Theboat!Theboatspeakswithme!
Areyouamadsailor?Relaxinghisblade.
Iamjustaneditor!Findinghiswaybackhometotheisland!Thisboatismyfriend!

Lethimbe,cameavoicefromthetrawler.
Heisoneofus.
Thevoicewasoldandcrackled.Likeanagedwoman.
Aladderfellfromthetrawler.
SEPRIUM165bidsmastergoodbye.SaidtheboatasDjangoclimbedon.
Imnotgoingtoletthemrecycleyouintoacoffin,heyelledback,thenup
Wetaketheboatyes?
Theswordsmancomplied.

sheoldiscoofavo/eli
Asuperclubvanishesintohell,leavinganimpenetratableshellonearth.
Lusciousavo,theproducer/owner
412

AndEli,thedjaretheonlytwomusicmagiciansthatcanbringtheclubbersbacktoearth.Beforethey
diefromdancing.
Thecircusofodarcrossesonboard.
Cantheyhelpsteerthediscoshipoutofsheol?/

EDITORSNOTE:STATUS_UNKNOWN.
Theblackdrapedboxonthewheelchairemanatedsmoke.
Masterwillsmokenow,saidtheswordsman.
ThespeakermountednexttotheboxlitanLEDgreen.
Acrackled,tornvoiceseepsfromthespeaker.
TheSARROGHEITUSisthegenesisprogramfortheODAR.ItsfirstmanifestationistheCIRQUDEODAR.
Theyarereconnaissance.Theoneswhogobeforeus,settingtheflags.
Theydousasagreatserviceinexchangeforagreatredemption
Foreachmessiahinthecircus,isalsoacriminal.Andtheseare,cosmic,spacetimecrimes.Things
blasphemedagainstgods,againsthumanity,againstcreation.ThisisthewayoftheODAR.

413

thisisthetightestpieceofshitwritingIveeverseen.IthinkInowhavetentaclesgrowingoutofmy
anus.
Thisisdevlish,satanic,obscure.-Wellis.T.Metro.Editorinchief.FABRICATEDSOCIETYonTHE
DISPELLLINGSOFSARROGHEITUS

Chapter1
Loversday.

Onemoredayofworkandtheweekendlands.Usually,thebar/foodplacewouldbepackedatthistime.
Loversdaymeantitshouldbeevenworse.Butno.notevenenoughpatronstoblasttherockmusic.Ice
sittingaroundmelting.Itwasnearingmidnight.
Valium,thewearysaid,space-timehavingthemensus?
.Thebarbossshrugged,pouredtheex=-professoranotherwhiskeyrocksIveneverseenthiskindof
shitbeforeVal.Somethingbighappeningelsewhere?
414

youmeanlikeanotherparty?
secretparty.Iknowallpartieshappeningaroundhere.
Valiumshrugged,maybesomeoneimportantdiedandeveryonesmourning.
someoneimportantisdyingeverydaymate,noonegivesashitanymore.
orwedontknowenoughtogiveashit.
dontletgooneofyourmedialectureshereval.
justsayingman,jesus.Hesluggedoffthewhiskeyinonego.Litanothercigarette.
Thebarbosslookedaroundhisnearemptybarwhilepouringvaliumanotherwhiskey.
fuckman,hesaidtohimself,wherethehelliseveryone?
Justthen,askinnywomanstumbledthroughthedoors.Shelookedheroindryandhaunted
help.helpthepeopleshekeptpointingoutside.Thebarbossandsomeothersranout.Valium
ambledbehindthem.
Theyexitedtoasuddenwinter,aterriblekindofancientsnowstormblowingthrough.Itwashardto
seethroughthewhite.Itwasallwrong.

ItNEVERsnowsinthiscity.
Ababbleofvoicesescapedthestormshockedcrowd
/whatthe/wherethebuildings?/Noroadnosky../ohgodohgod//Fuck.

Ininsaidthebarboss.
Theyallstumbledbackin,confused,rationaledisabled,rattledbythecold,utterlyalien/
Andfoundallthefurnitureinthebar,missing.

Chapter2
Someofthepatronshaddisappearedtoo.

415

whatthefucksgoingon?!motorcyclebillshouted.
Valiumwasunusuallysilent.
everybodycalmdown
itsfuckingsnowingoutthereman,calmdown?!
itstheendoftheworldasweknowit.Radio-junk-lordquoted.
itsallgone.Itsallgone.
Valiumthenspoke,eyeslostinadaze,wellfindthelostsuperclub,battered,roofless,outthere.
somethinghadhit.
Helookeduptothedoor,purposefullypossessed,channelingsomethingoutofthenorm,wellfindthe
bodies
heyVal!,youalrightmate?thebarbosstappedhimonhisshoulders.
Snappinghimoutofhisstrangereverie.
Valium,rolledhiseyesintohisheadandcollapsed.

Chapter3.

Hey.

Hey.
Val.
Canyouhearme?
Val!
Valium,theweary,wokeup.
Eyesblurringintothefacesofthebarboss.Ayoungboyandahugefigureunderablackdrape.
Val!Canyouhearme
416

Hejustmovedhismouthabit,thenstruggledtositup.Themenhelpedhimupthoughthebigblack
figuredidnotmove.Thebarbosspointedtothedoor,thehandlesaretoofrozentotouch.Doorwont
comedown.Valsawbrokenfurnituretossedtotheuselessside.Hesawdentsandchipsonthedoor.
allthephonesaredead.Theinternetsdown.Nopower.Theboysaid.
Thedrapedfigureremainedsilent.
Valkeptstaringatit.
Hethennoticedtheheroindriedgirlshiveringinthecorner.Hereyes,big,Japanese,staringstraightat
Val.
Helookedbackatthething,Iknowyou.
Helookedtothegirl,Iknowyouboth.
Valthensawtheboyandlaughedindisbelief.
areyouok,val?thebarbossasked.
Valiumwasjustlookingaroundtheemptybarasifseeingitfortheveryfirsttime.
andthisistheoutpost?helookedatthedrapedthing,thisistheoutpost?heaskedit.
howdoyouknowus?theconfusedboysaid,Itsnotpossible.Werenotfromhere.
Valjustlaughedagain,astrangeglowonhisface,lookingatthemindisbelief.
ofcourseIknowallofyou.hethenlookedstraightatthedrapedmonster,Icreatedyou.

everything of earth now as it is seen are suspended memories.


we're reliving off the memory of the earth as it fades away
allowing us time to adjust to our abrupt end.
language breaks down even in safe structures.
certain words have changed meaning.
context appears non context.
its difficult and compulsive.
to argue
to speak.

- Abstract from DYING STORIES
417


Todaydreamintheunrealityofourcanon.

Theomnibus,theanthology,thebook.Itsallwaiting/wanting.Thepagesrippedandshreddedand
smoked,facilitatesarushofsaliva,dizziness,virtue.Theancientmanwasblindandfullofgrime.
Smokingupthefiction/fact.Oldasfuck,stankenoughtoblushsheol.Crazybastardreally.Usedto
molestchildrenasachildmindyou.OLDERchildren.Wentintotimeformultiplerape.Claimedademon
madehimdoit.Theyalwaysblamethedemons.Now,hesgrownwisertheysay,looneyasabinby
boatsidebutstillwiser.Morepowerfuleven.Thosewhodareventuremorethoughtofhimwillfindhim
almostbottomless.Abysmal.Black.

i collect books and films and musics
they narrate and repeat histories
but i dont keep them very well.
i let them age and wear and tear
I let them be damaged and forgotten.

It will be nice
Very nice
If I could find my earphones
418


MYSTERIUMTEXTES
the author of these works
thanks the caring public.
good named zuma
december childe
the Jeff from 2001.
but the author is always breaking
the others are still at stake.
forests are coming down.
god have mercy on those who lost soul
mercy to the god that finds mine.
lust/lost/catatonia automatic pilot
i run the engine to its final days
another home destroyed, taken over
broken down.
a brutish high will take me tuesday
there will be sweat and slime and mental screaming
there will be much fear in the imagination of eye.

"oh god, the angels are at war."

so many people are missing.

the vanished. the taken.

there are already five mystery texts...

and there are so many parallel lives
of violence
valium &
vacuume
and Vama
WOMB_ONECOMMANDSATELLITE
APOCALYPSESTATE1000
GTPE-063(GHOST.TIME.POST.EARTH)
EDITINGBOARDTHEPANTHEON

Thememoryofapocalypsescrossespathlikethecreepofeternallightning.
Thisisexistencesengineincycle,
terrestrialturbine
Churningthememoriesofdeaddimensions
Ofrealmsbirthed,unfounded,andlost.

INattendancebe,PANTHEONelders(dramatispersonas)C.V.
419

L
thebridgethingofarchaea.
D
thedwellerovervault-m.
W
insprawllaythegreatdroningsound
N
post-schoolof1000.100
COURTPASTRONS
ART.JA
(A.X)2

n,beingthenearesttotherecentstar,tookcommenceintheconfrontationrm.
Overearth,seenthewindowstretch
Motherofheavensagainstendedskies
Inorbitanonlocala*(nonlocalorbiting)

n,
programinitiates
(excludingself-initiationof
NATIVITY)
:ad1
:omandae
:sarrogheitus
420

:IJAGI2.0

Womboneisasupermassiveplanetarysatellitesystemthatexistsinthearchetypal/armageddicregion
ofexistence.
ItstheprinciplemothershipofFetusONEtheresurrectioncrisishotel(omandae)
AndFETUS2(IJAGI2.0))
WOMBONEisinrecoverypositionomega.
Ghos~hausfromthefield
NINEfrom2208
ThedatafromVOLTERGEISTATION
WOMBONEisininstallationactalpha
For
FETUS1+2

weextractingFATALISfromdimensionFIELDfortwoassassinationcontracts.
a) The current high-priest of GrHg
b) the warlock EXCESS
@IJAGI2.0
Recoveryof*thewritingmanin2208*+ghos~haus.Attemptedsearchforpatronsbelongingtothe
continuumoftwomysterytexts.

Ofwhich
Aninterruptionoccurs.

421

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