Tabor 1 Alex Tabor Professor Cardenas-Adame Honors English 101 9 October 2011 How to Effectively Communicate Effectively speaking

or communicating is not a natural born trait given to each person, nor is it inherited over time. Learning to effectively present a topic or research to others is a skill that is not possessed by many, but the people who have learned to use it are the people who make life more enjoyable, more sociable with friends and strangers, and also they have learned how to create a personal connection through words or gestures. Effective communication is not only applied to work and school situations, but instead it is applied to all applications of life. It can help improve home, work, school, and other social situations by increasing happiness and having a more open approach to new friends and ideas. So what is effective communication, and how is it applied to everyday life? Effective communication is exactly as the name calls it, using different forms of communication in an irregular way in order to more effectively present information across to one another. This could be done through means of simple tasks such as using a hand motion in co ordinance with words in order to brighten the meaning, or it could be on a larger scale of Microsoft Powerpoint presentations. So what is the difference between effective communications from ordinary communications? Effective communication has emotion behind the meaning in order to create a personal encounter or relationship. Understanding the emotions behind the meanings are an

Tabor 2 important factor in effective communication also, and learning how to identify the emotions. There are four ways to create a deeper and more concise understanding through effective communication, starting with listening being the first and most important. Effective communication can not only go one way, and in order for both parties to understand the information at hand, listening is a key factor in understanding how to do so. Listening in an effective manner is different from ordinary listening though. Effectively listening to someone is not hearing the words they are saying only, but understanding the emotion behind the words and what these emotions mean. According to HelpGuide.org, listening attentively to someone helps with the following: Make the speaker feel heard and understood, which can help build a stronger, deeper connection between you. Create an environment where everyone feels safe to express ideas, opinions, and feelings, or plan and problem solve in creative ways. Save time by helping clarify information, and avoid conflicts and misunderstandings. Diffuse negative emotions. When emotions are running high, if the speaker feels that he or she has been truly heard, it can help to calm them down, diffuse negative feelings, and allow for real understanding or problem solving to begin.

Helpguide.org goes on later in the article giving tips such as avoiding interruption while conversing to divert the conversation in which a way it becomes evolved around another subject. Doing so makes the speaker feel more relieved and will be more willing to listen later on. Also tips such as avoiding looks that may come across as judgmental and to instead show your interest in the subject and participate in the conversation, given the right times. The second skill of effective communication is non-verbal communication. Non-verbal communication is the primary communication humans use, knowingly or not at the time. Non-

Tabor 3 verbal communications include hand and head gestures, facial expressions and reactions, muscle tension, tone of voice, eye contact, and even controlled breathing are all included in non-verbal communication. These different body languages communicate a point across without the use of spoken words. Learning body language and how to identify it can significantly improve relationships, whether they are personal or work-related relationships. According to Helpguide.org the most effective way to show an open body language is, by using open body languagearms uncrossed, standing with an open stance or sitting on the edge of your seat, and maintaining eye contact with the person youre talking to. Tips for non-verbal communication recommended by Helpguide.org suggested observing people in the general public in places like malls, public transportation bus, restaurant, television, ect and watch their body language as they react to situations. An open mind must be used though when observing the public; be aware of different nationalities and cultures and their traditions. Reading too much into a single gesture can give an inaccurate read; all aspects of body language and tone should be assessed. After having done so, Helpguide.org also suggests improving self body language with the following: Use nonverbal signals that match up with your words. Adjust your nonverbal signals according to the context. Use body language to convey positive feelings

The third skill used with effective communication is learning how to manage stress. In small doses, stress can be beneficial and can help an individual more quickly than usual, but unless kept to a minimal, stress can be hard and tiring on the body. Stress can cause off-putting body language and signals to coworkers or family, and can often times lead to further

Tabor 4 complications. Recognizing oncoming stress before it has fully capacitated ones mind is an important factor in learning to reduce and manage stress, and is also the first step in calming down a situation. Secondly, take a moment to calm down and relax in order to reduce statements and words usually not said whether it be a work or home environment. Thirdly, compromising is a great alternative to destroying a potential relationship. Learning to bend a little both ways can help with a win-win situation, and possibly establish future relations. The fourth and final effective communication skill is learning emotion awareness. Emotions play an important role in home and work situations, and they are what drive motivation in people to get what is needed done. Learning emotional awareness is a tool that can be used to both understand yourself and others around and the real messages that are trying to be communicated. Emotional imbalance can cause raised levels of stress, causing further problems. According to one author, Disturbance in thought pattern over a longer period of time affects the body systems and gradually causes imbalance in our energy system, which triggers a sequence of physiological activities (body) OR symptoms that ultimately culminates in ill-health"(Negative Emotions). Being conscious of your moment-to-moment interactions and the emotions being displayed all helps create toward a better self image and positivity that others will notice. Emotional awareness can help with not only understanding yourself and why the emotions you have are there but it can also help empathize with other peoples problems. This will help build strong and effective relationships with co-workers and family members alike. In review, the four necessary skills for effective communication include learning to listen attentively and wholeheartedly, non-verbal communication, managing stress, and also by

Tabor 5 becoming emotionally aware. Including these four effective skills in everyday life and situations will guarantee for longer lasting and more durable relationships. Doing so will help create better work-related relationships, along with bring together families and friends in a closer manner.

Tabor 6 Works Cited "Effective Communication: Improving Communication Skills in Business and Relationships." Helpguide.org: Expert, Ad-free Articles Help Empower You with Knowledge, Support & Hope. Web. 17 Oct. 2011. <http://www.helpguide.org/mental/effective_communication_skills.htm>. "Negative Emotions | Emotional Imbalance | Unwanted Thoughts." Purge Negative Emotions | Online Bach Flower Therapy Consultation. Web. 17 Oct. 2011. <http://www.charminghealth.com/negative-emotions/negative-emotions.htm>.