the carillon

The University of Regina Students Newspaper since 1962

January 5 - 11, 2012 | Volume 54, Issue 15 | carillonregina.com

cover
the staff
editor-in-chief john cameron editor@carillonregina.com business manager josh jakubowski business@carillonregina.com production manager mason pitzel production@carillonregina.com copy editor jonathan hamelin copyeditor@carillonregina.com news editor natasha tersigni news@carillonregina.com a&c editor jonathan petrychyn aandc@carillonregina.com sports editor autumn mcdowell sports@carillonregina.com op-ed editor edward dodd op-ed@carillonregina.com features editor dietrich neu features@carillonregina.com visual editor julia dima graphics@carillonregina.com ad manager shaadie musleh advertising@carillonregina.com technical coordinator matthew blackwell technical@carillonregina.com news writer a&c writer sports writer photographers kelsey conway jarrett crowe marc messett lauren golosky sophie long paul bogdan ed kapp

Turns out that if you want press passes to an NHL event, all you have to do is re off an email. Thats how our news and sports editors are able to give you exclusive Jets coverage this week! The rest of the Carillon is totally not even jealous.

features

12

news

arts & culture

troy jul arthur ward matt yim

colonialism II

queerping it real

10

contributors this week kyle leitch, kristen mcewen, colton hordichuk, taylor shire, kent peterson

sports

op-ed

THE CARILLON BOARD OF DIRECTORS

the paper

John Cameron, Anna Dipple, Kristy Fyfe, Jenna Kampman, Mason Pitzel, Dan Shier, Rhiannon Ward, Anna Weber
www.carillonregina.com Ph: (306) 586-8867 Fax: (306) 586-7422 Printed by Transcontinental Publishing Inc., Saskatoon

227 Riddell Centre University of Regina - 3737 Wascana Parkway Regina, SK, Canada, S4S 0A2

hoopin it

16

hold up it is

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The Carillon welcomes contributions to its pages. Correspondence can be mailed, e-mailed, or dropped off in person. Please include your name, address and telephone number on all letters to the editor. Only the authors name, title/position (if applicable) and city will be published. Names may be withheld upon request at the discretion of the Carillon. Letters should be no more then 350 words and may be edited for space, clarity, accuracy and vulgarity. The Carillon is a wholly autonomous organization with no afliation with the University of Regina Students Union. Opinions expressed in the pages of the Carillon are expressly those of the author and do not necessarily reect those of the Carillon Newspaper Inc. Opinions expressed in advertisements appearing in the Carillon are those of the advertisers and not necessarily of The Carillon Newspaper Inc. or its staff. The Carillon is published no less than 11 times each semester during the fall and winter semesters and periodically throughout the summer. The Carillon is published by The Carillon Newspaper Inc., a nonprot corporation. In keeping with our reckless, devil-may-care image, our ofce has absolutely no concrete information on the Carillons formative years readily available. What follows is the story thats been passed down from editor to editor for over forty years.

a quick note
About two weeks and zero plays through A Christmas Story on TBS (since Peachtree doesnt air that marathon, those assholes), were back from the break and ready to throw some journalism at you, assuming you havent taken shelter behind a tree or in the Owl. By the way, if you can think of something simple and fun youd like to see replace this stupid intercom blurb, shoot a message to production@ carillonregina.com! I hate this thing.

the manifesto

In the late 1950s, the University of Regina planned the construction of several new buildings on the campus grounds. One of these proposed buildings was a bell tower on the academic green. If you look out on the academic green today, the rst thing youll notice is that it has absolutely nothing resembling a bell tower. The University never got a bell tower, but what it did get was the Carillon, a newspaper that serves as a symbolic bell tower on campus, a loud and clear voice belonging to each and every student. Illegitimi non carborundum.

photos
news natasha tersigni a&c ladyofthecake.com sports balfour.rbe.sk.ca op-ed sessions.edu cover natasha tersigni

news
lauren golosky
news writer Fuelled by her own experience with racism as a young aboriginal woman growing up on the Prairies, University of Regina student Juilanne Beaudin-Herney is working to put a stop to systemic racism, an an invisible set of ideologies that have been built into Canada, such as patriarchy, ethnocentrism, euro-centrism. Her prescription is education. In November, BeaudinHerney began circulating a petition to make indigenous studies a mandatory course for all degrees, certificates, and diploma programs at the U of R. So far, the petition has collected over 400 signatures from students, faculty, and community members. The whole idea of [the petition] is not to bring up issues, but to address the things that have affected the relationship between non-aboriginals and aboriginals in the past to help bring forward awareness in the issues, Beaudin-Herney said. That way we can start working on the accumulated debt of this stigma we have towards each other, where we just kind of assume we dont like each other just because we were raised this way. Beaudrin-Herney has not only the support of hundreds of students behind her but also the support of important figures around the university. Students associations, such as the University of Regina Students Union, Luther University Student Association, and the Indigenous Students Association, have pledged their support to this cause. But the support doesnt end there. Ive been talking to some people at the First Nations University and Im going to make an appointment with some of the deans, because yes, Vianne Timmons is important in this, but its also moreso about the academic part of the house, she explained. Im going to take a meeting with Rick Kleer, who is head of the arts [faculty], and kind of converse with him. Hes already been talking to a few people I know and he is in favour of it, so that helps me out. But where there is support, there is criticism, and BeaudinHerney has met with much of that too. People dont want to pay for an extra class, she explained. They dont want another core class. This doesnt affect [them]. Theres no issue. Canadas not racist. They just like believing that theyre not part of the issue. Beaudin-Herney takes the criticism mostly in stride, as she believes that most of it stems from societal ignorance. This ignorance comes partly from a serious lack of education on issues of both his-

News Editor: Natasha Tersigni news@carillonregina.com the carillon | Jan. 5 - 11, 2012

We have to learn about our own holocaust

U of R student fights for mandatory indigenous studies course
Students sound off
On Dec. 1, shortly after Beaudin-Herney began circulating her petition, the U of Rs ofcial blog asked students, Should Indigenous Studies be mandatory at the U of R? Students responded in the comments section; their responses are excerpted below.

I wouldnt sign this ... However, I do strongly believe that there should be at least one mandatory Indigenous Studies class to graduate high school. This seems like a more appropriate avenue for this information, and I believe that the sooner that this type of information and these key discussions take place in a persons life, the more inuential they will be. -K
Youtube video by BradBasic

Julianne Beaudin-Herney has speared headed a petition to make indigenous studies a mandatory course for all degrees, certicates, and diploma programs at the U of R torical and contemporary standing. Think of things such as the Indian Act, the Doctrine of Discovery, [and] the White Paper from Trudeau, which is really important because Trudeau, in Canadian history class here, is emulated as a Canadian hero, she explained. But he created the White Paper, which clearly addressed to wipe out everything First Nations to save the Indian, to save the savage. This wasnt that long ago. learn about the We Holocaust and everything else, but we have to learn about our own holocaust; this is the same thing. By addressing the issues that surround First Nations people in Canada, other social problems may be addressed, such as problems of gender and religion. Beaudin-Herney asserted that indigenous studies is all-encompassing, and that by addressing aboriginal issues, issues such as violence against women will also be addressed. There are more people than just First Nations and non-aboriginals, and I know that there are other minorities out there, she said. Im not ignoring them. If we tackle this issue, we can tackle them all. As an indigenous person herself, Beaudin-Herney has encountered racism, both direct and systemic. Her personal experiences with racism encouraged her desire for change and prompted her to create this initiative. An encounter with an Indian princess Halloween costume made an impresson on BeaudinHerney just before she authored the petition. I felt really objectied, she said of seeing the costume. ...Its just an objectifying image of Pocahontas, and being dehumanized and sexualized and romanticized. Beaudin-Herney believes that, in Canada, the appropriation and misrepresentation of First Nations culture as costumes the Indian princess outfit, as well as the Internet-notorious hipster headdress is based in cultural misunderstanding of the indigenous people of Canada. BeaudinHerney wants U of R students to consider this issue. In a region whose aboriginal population is expected to skyrocket in the next 30 years, good communication between the majority and the growing First Nations community is essential. I believe that if you believe youre Canadian, and if youre going out into the workforce, then you should know how to communicate with your neighbour, Beaudin-Herney said. It is just understanding each other, being able to have a straightforward conversation ... instead of tiptoeing around the things you cant say. We want to have a harmonious relationship, but how are we able to do that when were just sweeping issues under the rug and were not getting anything done? Although shes secure in her identity, many of her peers are not. Many of them lack her pride and are actually turned off by First Nations culture, a problem Beaudin-Herney refers to as whitewashing. She also believes that whitewashing is a symptom of systemic racism. [First Nations people] think that First Nations people are disgusting, therefore they dont date First Nations people, she said. They marginalize First Nations people and it is terrible; its getting worse and worse. She has encountered this in some of her personal relationships, such as with her exboyfriend and even within her own family. I try to keep my family informed, and they have learned a lot from this, she said proudly. I whipped my brother in shape like nobodys business. Beaudin-Herney is proud of her journey so far, as shes educating others and herself. BeaudinHerney, who is transferring her major from visual arts to indigenous studies, said shes learned a lot about how the university operates and how to co-operate with administration to produce change. Despite any criticism, Beaudin-Herneys experience with the initiative has proved to be a positive one for her. Ive made a lot of new friends, and Im more involved in my own community, she said. But Im not forgetting about the friends I had before; Im just balancing them both. But her work is not done. Expect to find Beaudin-Herney and her petition in the Riddell Centre sometime in the weeks to come. The petition may eventually make its way to all universities across Canada.

This would have to be a very degree specic requirement as it is simply not applicable in many programs. While I would understand its importance in elds such as education and nursing, for someone in the hard sciences such as mathematics, physics, and computer science there is very limited application for native studies. Lloyd

In a respectful way, I disagree with the arguments given for not signing the petition ... Obviously there are more specic occupations that supposedly need it more than others, like social workers and teachers to name two, but the way society continues to perpetuate stereotypes and prejudices toward Canadas Indigenous people makes it impossible not to have them. A We need societal change, not more pushing of the same old issues and concerns of the past. We need to look at eradicating segregation and promoting Canadian history, not certain groups histories. Instead of being forced to take indian studies, we should have a series of elective CNDA classes or something. Aysia

Visit carillonregina.com to share your thoughts on this article in our comments section, too! You werent doing anything else with your weekend, probably.

news

the carillon | Jan. 5 - 11, 2012

The new colonialism

Human rights advocate Gerry Caplan claims Western aid is an investment in dictatorships
natashi tersigni
news editor To help celebrate International Human Rights Day on Dec. 10, as well as the 50th anniversary of Canadian University Service Overseas (CUSO), the University of Winnipegs Global College brought in Gerry Caplan, a Canadian who has been active for over 50 years in the fight for equality, social justice, and peace around the world. Along with being a world-recognized expert on the genocide in Rwanda, Caplan has held many positions throughout the human rights struggle. He was a CUSO field officer posted in Africa , senior consultant for the UN Economic Commission for Africa in Addis Ababa (capital city of Ethiopia) , author of several books on the human rights issues in Africa, and is currently a columnist on human rights issues for the Globe and Mail. With an extensive background on the issues of human rights, Caplan captivated audiences by sharing his experiences. A major issue in his presentation was the misrepresentation that Western countries, including Canada, are helping African countries, which in fact is not true. There was not a single tyrant, not a single dictator [that] could have gotten into government in Africa or could have stayed there if hadnt been for the backing of one white country or another, Caplan said. In every single case, the elites of Africa work with the elites of the West in betraying the people of Africa. Together, the rich Western world and the African leadership, time after time, in dozens of ways, betray their own people. Capaln used the Rwanda genocide and the Mobutu dictatorship in the Congo as examples when the West failed Africa. Mobutu Sese Seko, mainly know as Mobutu, was president of the Republic of Congo from 1965 to 1997. During his time in ofce, Mobutu formed an authoritarian regime, amassed vast personal wealth, and attempted to purge the country of all colonial influence. Early in his rule, he consolidated power by publicly executing political rivals, secessionists, coup plotters, and other threats to his rule. To set an example, many were hanged before large audiences, including former Prime Minister Evariste Kimba. According to Transparency International, Mobutu embezzled over $5 billion from his country, ranking him as the third-most corrupt leader in the past two decades and the most corrupt African leader during the same period. Caplan blames the West for Mobutu gaining power and keeping it for all those years. Mobutu was put there by the Americans, and was kept there by the Americans, Caplan said. He was given tens of millions of dollars of aid, which everyone who gave him the money knew would

Nastasha Tersigni

Gerry Caplan speaks to help celebrate in Winnipeg to commemorate International Human Rights Day never be repaid, while he disembowelled and hollowed out his own country. The genocide in Rwanda is just another example of the West destroying African countries, said Caplan, who has spent 12 years studying the infamous killings. The Rwandan genocide would have never have happened if a group of greedy Hutu leaders hadnt brilliantly managed to mobilize hundreds of thousands of Hutu citizens to hate and ultimately kill mercilessly the[ir] fellow Rwandans who happen to be Tutsi, Caplan said. But [it was] white missionaries who came and virtually created the division between the Hutu and the Tutsi, which had not existed previously in that way. Along with white missionaries, Caplan called out Belgium, France, and the United States for their role in starting the genocide, as well as letting it continue as long as it did. If it hadnt been for the Belgium administration having not done terrible enough work in the Congo for thirty years under King Leopold. If they hadnt institutionalized those divisions and exacerbated the hatred and the conict between the Hutu and the Tutsi. If it hadnt been for the government of France, including socialist president Francois Hollande. If they hadnt come the French on the side of those that have been plotting the genocide in the early nineties it would have never of happened, Caplan said. The most famous [negligence] is what the UN Security Council failed to do. led by the Clinton administration. It failed time after time to reinforce General Romeo Dallaires puny little troops in response to his urgent, urgent pleas to send him more people. In both those events, the rich world was in the middle because it is the beneficiary, Caplan insisted. He said the West is still exploiting African nations, thru subsidies, tax evasion, and stealing its skilled and trained workers. You can simplify the history of Africa and the relationship to the West in this way, Caplan said. It goes from slave labour, to cheap labour, to skilled labour, and the West has exploited all of it. Capaln said the West is still exploiting Africa today and used many examples, one being the Brain Drain. The Brain Drain is when the West benefits enormously from bringing trained, skilled Africans to the rich white countries, depriving their countries from what they need most, Caplan explained. He used a recent study from a British medical journal that looked at nine African countries and their relationship with Canada, United States, Australia, and Britain, and how those four countries are continuing to receive skilled, trained doctors from Africa. The calculation is that Canada saved $400 million and the four white countries together saved $4.5 billion in having these trained doctors, which the countries didnt have to train themselves, Caplan said. The African countries lost anywhere between two, and depending on how you calculated it, $13 billion that they had spent training these skilled workers. Subsidies are another way Caplan said the West is beneting from Africa. Capaln said there are trade deals in Africa based on free trade for them and subsidies for the West. If you went to an African country and you wanted a chicken, it would be cheaper for you to go to a modern supermarket [and] buy a chicken from Holland then it would be for you to buy a chicken from a neighbour up the street who was growing chickens, because that chicken from Holland would be so greatly subsidized in the European Union, Caplan said. He went on to say that fact is true for many other commodities. Caplan also talked about the Wests idea of investing in Africa. When we talk about investment, investment overwhelming means our mineral companies go in and rip of their minerals, their diamonds, their trees, their cotton, their gold, Caplan said. In return, they bribe local ofcials, they bribe senior officials. They leave behind environmental disasters. They pay tragic wages. As for the myth of foreign aid, Caplan said, Western governments just tell the public what it wants to hear. Dont believe a single thing you hear about foreign aid; the numbers are all wrong, he said. The numbers are distorted. It is impossible to know what a government really gives except we know its not enough. In every single case it ends up helping us more than the recipient. Caplan said there is an entire network set up from the Western countries to get foreign aid back. In the last forty years, it is calculated $1.8 trillion is estimated to be shipped out of Africa by an entire network of lawyers, accountants, bankers, and economists, working with various Western institutions helping to get that money off the continent, Caplan said. All that money is worth many times the amount of foreign aid [the West] pretends to give to Africa. Weve thought of ourselves as solution to their problem. Weve thought of ourselves as the great initiators, the great entrepreneurs, the great go-getters, while they sit there waiting for us to help them. The fact is we are the recipients of their extraordinary generosity.

There was not a single tyrant, not a single

dictator [that] could have gotten into government in Africa or could have stayed there if hadnt been for the backing of one white country or another.
Gerry Caplan

the carillon | Jan. 5 - 11, 2012

news

Are media outlets perpetuating sexual assault myths?

New Brunswick prof feels these crimes are often misrepresented
colin mcphail
cup atlantic bureau chief Women urged not to walk alone at night. That was the sub-headline of an online story published by CBC on Sept. 8, warning citizens of Moncton, N.B., there was a suspect at large in connection with three recent attacks on women. The article, entitled Moncton RCMP probe 3 attacks, offered a police sketch of a male in his early 20s, along with the necessary descriptive information and where the assaults took place. The women were typically grabbed from behind at night and sometimes brought to the ground before managing to escape. The story aimed to alert residents of the perpetrator, but also to advocate a change of lifestyle for women in the community. Not men. Not children or teenagers. Just women. This was the lead paragraph: The RCMP in Moncton is warning women not to walk alone at night after three attacks in the citys downtown in less than a month. Codiac Regional RCMP Corporal Dan Roy recommended it himself. Megan Glenwright, a University of New Brunswick sociology and womens studies student who volunteers at the UNB Womens Centre, was incredulous after reading the story. I feel like theyre putting the blame on the victim and putting the responsibility in the womans hands to not be assaulted, [instead of] putting the blame on whos assaulting people, she said. Its the same message presented over and over again. Dont present yourself in a way that you might be assaulted, rather than teaching young men, Hey, you probably shouldnt assault people. Taking precaution is never a bad idea. However, Chris McCormick, a St. Thomas University criminology professor, said its sending the wrong message. The subhead should have read, Men are encouraged to not walk alone at night, because otherwise theyd be suspected, he said. Why put the onus on women when women didnt do the crime? Its men that are doing the crime. Ninety-eight per cent of attackers are men, according to the Fredericton Sexual Assault Crisis Centre (FSACC). Eighty-two per cent of the victims are women, while 15 per cent are boys under the age of 17. Advised lifestyle adjustment and sensationalized fear are just two of several sexual assault myths often perpetuated by the media in countless stories of similar nature. At the core of these myths are societal perceptions of the culture surrounding the assaults, most of which are incorrect and propagated by media outlets. The end result is a habitual ing with after effects of an assault. While Whalley said each case is unique, there are commonalities in the aftermath. The centre supports victims in dealing with how others react to them afterwards, coming forward, fears of continual harassment, and what is the most infuriating effect, for Whalley self-blame. Its a cultural thing, with victim blaming, Glenwright said. The question, Was she asking for it? still seems to be posed in some form. Glenwright said societal norms create the illusion that women put themselves in a position to be assaulted for wearing slutty clothes, walking at night, or consuming too much alcohol. However, she noted that studies have revealed there is no correlation between what a woman wears and whether or not shes going to be assaulted. Its because of inequality, gender inequality that exists in our society, Whalley said. When you have people who are generally perceived to be equal, theres no need to have the feeling of power over [another] or to keep power. The standard perceived behaviours dene women a certain way, but they also dene men a certain way, according to Whalley. Girls grow up in a world where from day one we learn, in different ways, that we have to worry about rape, which is very different from how little boys grow up, she said, adding that its not to say boys arent assaulted, but generally thats not what parents worry about. The focus was all on women having to adjust their behaviour instead of looking at it community wide, Whalley explained. We dont tell people to stay off the streets at 12 a.m. because they might get hit by a drunk driver. We say, Dont drive drunk. Changing the tone The media is getting it wrong, according to McCormick, when it comes to reporting on the perpetrator, the scene, the aftermath, and even the victim. The survivor stories are often presented in a neutral manner, free of emotion. You dont hear the voices of the victims, he said. In the victimization surveys, we find that victims are angry; theyre really angry. These arent dispassionate people, but their experiences become dispassionate accounts. While McCormick, Glenwright, and Whalley all agree that the media needs to alter its reporting on sexual assault, Whalley said the change needs to occur on a broader scale. True prevention is social change, she explained. Its about having people understand why sexual assaults actually happen, why it occurs, why it keeps occurring, and trying to change those attitudes.

Andrew Meade/The Brunswickan

Its the same message presented over and over again. Dont present yourself in
a way that you might be assaulted, rather than teaching young men, Hey, you probably shouldnt assault people.
Megan Glenwright
fingerpointing at the victim, which, for the most part, creates stigmas around being assaulted and leads to many unreported cases. Victimization surveys conducted by Statistics Canada suggest between one and three and one and four women will be sexually abused in their lifetime, yet McCormick said 94 per cent of sexual assaults are not reported. The myths being broadcast from society, and again in the media, rarely depict the true culture behind sexual assaults. For instance, articles similar to the aforementioned case in Moncton draw a profile of a typical assailant a stranger in the shadows ready to attack. McCormick said that assumption is false. Over 90 per cent of sexual assaults are committed by someone known to the victim, he said. Yet, the media lends to the idea that assailants are strange, sinister men. Constructing Danger: In Emotions and Mis/Representation of Crime in the News, McCormicks latest book, he studied sexual assault stories in the National Post for a year. He found that over half of the pieces featured a stranger as the perpetrator about 40 per cent off the actual trend. Theyre emphasizing that its strangers, he said. We know that many of these instances happen in private, but the National Post sample said half occurred in public. So, theyre emphasizing public stranger danger. After analyzing a similar situation at a Halifax television station, McCormick asked the news editor why the station was focusing on incidents involving stranger attacks. The editor said the station decided a long time ago not to bother with the instances involving acquaintances. He just said it was ordinary and Stranger danger not interesting, McCormick said, astonished. It wasnt simply a happenstancial conclusion, but they made a very decided conclusion to diminish that type of reporting. Theres nothing wrong with that if you consider it entertainment. But if you consider it reality reporting, its not recording reality. Glenwright powers down her Mac laptop, packs it along with her books into her bag, and cleans off her desk at the UNB Womens Centre. She turns off the lights and locks up before making her way out of the UNB Students Union Building, which is just about deserted at 8 p.m. on a weeknight. Outside the front doors is Pacey Drive and the vast, ill-lit parking lot also void of life across the street. She heads toward her car, sometimes needing to travel an extra 200 metres to an auxiliary lot, but her thoughts are far from the paranoid or anxious variety. Whats likely to cross her mind is an upcoming social gathering, the next step in writing her thesis, or maybe whats for dinner. Theyre normal thoughts from someone with a grip on the current circumstances of sexual assaults. Glenwright said she would be more concerned at a party than walking home alone at night. I dont worry about it, she said, adding that its her prerogative.The cultural perceptions of it are not really well-versed in the reality of it. Lorraine Whalley, executive director of the FSACC, said the cultural perceptions are amplied on university campuses. The combination of sexually-charged young adults and binge drinking creates a setting where assaults can occur nearly every weekend Misconceptions and some weekdays for that matter. The attitude about parties and binge drinking and the idea that women are fair game I would say at every university there is that culture, and its representative of societal culture, Whalley said. The problem is, however, the lines can appear to be blurred especially when alcohol is involved. The cases reported by the media are often violent acts of aggression, lending to the myth that strong visual evidence of an attack is needed in order to be deemed newsworthy, let alone legitimate. Sexual assault is always violent, Whalley said. Just because someone isnt being held down and beaten, its still a violent crime. Preconceived notions of what a sexual assault looks like can affect the manner in which the victim is treated, according to Whalley. Victims have limited resources open to them to begin with in New Brunswick the FSACC is the only facility of its kind in the province but uninformed service providers, hospitals, and even police could affect the victim negatively. If there are misconceptions that she should be hysterical, she should be really upset, she should be crying, but she isnt because maybe shes trying to keep it together or her personality that could impact the way service providers respond, Whalley said. Inequality issues The FSACC has been responding to the needs of survivors, raising awareness, and operating a 24hour crisis line since its inception in 1975. Whalley said the now 40volunteer strong operation receives, on average, more than 100 calls a year from survivors deal-

news

the carillon | Jan. 5 - 11, 2012

Extispicy 2012
The Carillon brings you these hot predictions, courtesy of some ritual animal slaughter
john cameron, julia dima, autumn mcdowell, jonathan petrychyn, natasha tersigni,
nostradami Here at the Carillon, we like to keep our editorial process edgy, needlessly complicated, and frankly as disgusting as possible. The writing of this years news cycle predictions piece was no different. Our editorial staff gathered over the break to train in the ancient Mesopotamian art of extispicy, the divination of the future through animal entrails. A few ritual sacrices later, and we were able to gure out what you have to look forward to in 2012. Enjoy we sure did! Will and Kates rst anniversary (fox lungs) the 1975 election. His post-NDP work with the United Nations spanned more than two decades, and he currently runs his own charitable foundation dedicated to HIV/AIDS prevention. This year will be his year to get back into politics. As a bonus, the media will have a good time trying to come up with Stephen vs. Stephen jokes. /NT In a New Years Eve interview with Postmedias Randy Boswell, heritage minister James Moore suggested that the CBCs size and efciency were directly related, a likely justification for the cuts sure to come down later this year. Facebook petitions will start and people will be in shock citing, Its a national symbol that cannot be taken away. Then a survey will quietly appear online that asks how many hours a week do we actually spend watching or listening to the CBC. The answer will shock the CBC advocates, as it will come back less than one hour for almost everyone, and Harper will have the proof he needs for him to continue to defund the CBC. Sadly, this means a certain funny, good looking, rower/news editor will have to rely on Youtube for her Coronation Street episodes from now on. /NT Sidney Crosby (a Google image search for Sidney Crosby CAT Scan) Goose liver: The fall of the CBC

After a whirlwind wedding in 2011, the royal power couple will continue to travel the Commonwealth on grandmas dollar for no other reason than to have thousands of fans swoon in their presence. Quickly, though, Will and Kate will tire of having their asses kissed, and, after a crazy night of gin and clubbing that leaves Kate bruised and battered, we find out that Kate is pregnant. But there are complications with Kates pregnancy, which culminates in a gruesome caesarian section caught on lm by Hello! Magazine. In a surprising twist, Prince Harry claims the daughter who Kate names Cariana as his own, launching accusations of indelity and tearing the Royal Family apart. /JP US Presidential election (donkey and elephant intestines)

Julia Dima

since ghosts cant run for president, Obama is looking at a narrow victory this October unless the economy craters further, America plunges into another endless war, or the newly-minted National Defense Authorization Act detains some grannies indefinitely or something. /JC Stephen Harpers Government (snake asshole)

report cards. By the end of 2012, expect John Baird to noogie Justin Trudeau and then force Trudeau to apologize to parliament for having a weenie little beard. /JC There are other levels of government too apparently (ant thorax)

stomach)

As the long-form dry hump of Conservative ideology that is this election cycles Reupublican presidential nomination race reaches its climactic thrusts, the party will almost surely anoint stablepolling moderate and zillionaire charm abyss Mitt Romney as its candidate. Unfortunately for Romney, the only Republican outperforming Obama in current polls is hypothetical non-entity Republican Candidate, and

This year will be fun for the 40.38 per cent of voting Canadians who did not vote for Stephen Harpers majority Conservative government, and by fun I mean probably a nightmare without end. Between placing record-setting limits on debate and bullying and intimidating opposition MPs like Megan Leslie and Irwin Cotler, the current Tories are the political equivalent of the rich kid in the pro wrestling shirt who spent all of seventh grade tripping fat kids during recess and making gay jokes instead of working during group projects, turng everyones

Lightning round! The Saskatchewan government, which campaigned against reviewing potash royalty rates, will announce by December that it will review potash royalty rates. It will also rather sensibly! refuse to commit funding for a new stadium in Regina. In Regina, Mayor Pat Fiacco will stop playing coy and run for mayor again, out of love for Regina, and so should you, and anyways what is your deal, non-Regina-loving person who complains about things. Meanwhile homelessness and drug crime and a precipitous housing bubble or whatever, who cares. Regina! /JC Occupy the world (whale

The Occupy movements that swept across North America in 2011 look like theyve lost steam as we enter the new year. Not so. Its simply that instead of occupying Wall Street, city parks, and Christmas, protesters will soon be seen occupying minimum wage jobs and overpriced housing. The occupy protests began in a rush of energy and motivation, but winter seemed to slow down the momentum and the new year may see the We are the 99% posters hanging in bedrooms instead of lining the streets. /JD The next NDP leader (beaver tail)

The opening in the New Democratic Partys leadership left by Jack Laytons passing is exactly what dark-horse (and hithcandidate erto-undeclared) Stephen Lewis needs to re-invent himself. The Ontario NDP saw its seats in the provincial legislature double under his leadership in

Unfortunately for hockey fans, Crosby will be sidelined for the remainder of the 2011-12 season, and will not see game action again until Oct. 2012. Until that time, he will have a permanent seat in the pressbox, where he will act as an assistant coach for the Penguins. Although there will be times when Crosby is said to be a game-time decision and may see ice time, continued setbacks and concussion symptoms will once again make headlines for the majority of 2012. Rumours will swirl around possible retirement, but they will prove to be false. /AM

a&c
Best things in music for 2011
Arcade Fire win a Grammy Arcade Fire took home album of the year in February at the Grammys. Its nice to see that talented musicians can still be publicly recognized for their efforts amongst the slew of garbage that surrounds them and cleans up at most award shows. The Black Keys El Camino

A&C Editor: Jonathan Petrychyn aandc@carillonregina.com the carillon | Jan. 5 - 11, 2012

Five bands you didnt hear in 2011

From Icelandic post-rock to local country tunes, heres what you werent listening to, but should have been, last year

Worst things in music for 2011

Seeing his or her favourite band achieve large-scale success is, in theory, every hipsters worst nightmare. Now that everyone loves this band, theyre so not cool anymore. Theyre probably going to sign to a major record label now so they can suck the labels dicks for a big fat paycheque. The White Stripes call it a day In early 2011, Jack and Meg White announced they would no longer be playing their minimalist rock n roll as The White Stripes. Arcade Fire win a Grammy

Not only is this album far more energetic than The Black Keys 2010 release, Brothers, it also demonstrates an improvement of the power duos songwriting abilities. As well, El Camino shows that you dont have to wait three years for a band to put out a new record. Kanye West is tweeting again

Alexisonre also call it a day

thestarphoenix.com

There was a lull for a while when Kayne Wests Twitter account was pretty inactive, but recently hes back on form with tweeting things such as, how ill it is to really fall in love... Pimpin is whatev ... Love is that shit! or how in his perfect world, every girl gets married in Givenchy couture. Foo Fighters - Wasting Light

paul bogdan
a&c writer You probably heard a lot of new music in 2011, some good and some not so good. The following is a list of what you maybe didnt hear, what was overlooked, or what wasnt received as well as it should have been. The Lonesome Weekends are too good not to like. They self-released their rst effort, Songs for Lonesome Weekends, in April 2011, and its denitely worth checking out whether you like country music or not. Most of their songs are simple ditties about drinking, but damned if youre not singing them in your head after the album is finished. The Lonesome Weekends live shows are also a great time as well; everyones pretty well-liquored and dancing with someone else by the end of the night. Sigur Ros The Icelandic post-rock quartets The Lonesome Weekends

This isnt to say that the past few Foo Fighters albums were bad, but Wasting Light rocks, goddammit. At 42, Dave Grohl and pals show they can rock harder than bands with members half their age. Death From Above 1979 reform

latest album for XL, Inni, is a live recording of their nal concert before an indenite hiatus. Though Inni and its accompanying concert lm received satisfactory reviews, it should have fared better, considering it not only includes the rst new Sigur Ros song since 2007 but also sees Sigur Ros performing without the assistance of a string or horn section. Even with only guitar, bass, drums, and keyboards, the bands performance is just as rich and intense as the studio recordings. Aloe Blacc The singles that soul and R&B singer Aloe Blacc released in 2011 werent nearly as successful as 2010s I Need A Dollar, but they were nonetheless equally soulful and catchy. Loving You is Killing Me and Green Lights didnt chart in some countries, and where they did chart, they didnt reach the heights of Blaccs own I Need a Dollar. But like all good music, Blaccs music leaves you with something after the song is nished, even if that somethings as simple as a smile.

Nick Faye and the Deputies

If you havent listened to The Last Best West, stop reading this, go download it from Nick Fayes Bandcamp page right now and set aside a half-hour to listen to eight well-written, pop-rock tunes. There arent any flashes, frills, or face-melting guitar solos, just a good hook and a strong structure in every song, which makes for a great album. Art vs. Science Australian dance-rock band Art vs. Science released their rst fulllength album, The Experiment, in February. Improving on the formula of their 2010 self-titled EP, Art vs. Science use synths, distorted bass, drums, and the occasional guitar to create super-catchy dance rock thats worth a listen. Its almost impossible to listen to Art vs. Science and not want to dance, whether you typically enjoy dancing or not. Maybe Id go to more clubs in Regina if they played more Art vs. Science.

With Dallas Green leaving the band to focus on City and Colour, and Wade MacNeil also leaving to be the new frontman of Gallows, Alexisonre were left without two guitarists, without two founding members, and, they decided, without a band. Lou Reed and Metallica Lulu

This hilariously awful collaboration is quite likely the worst album of the year. Even though we at the Carillon tore it apart last semester, words cant truly describe just how bad it is. If anything, its worth listening to with a couple friends over a few drinks and getting in some good laughs. R. Kelly is still trapped in the closet

After a ve-year hiatus, the Canadian duo reformed to play at Coachella followed by a North American tour. It was disheartening to see such a great band part ways after only one studio album, but their return could lead to more shows and, with any luck, new music.

In December, R. Kelly announced that he has 32 more chapters of his hiphopera Trapped in the Closet, which already has 22 chapters. If youre unfamiliar with Trapped in the Closet, its basically a narrative story thats sung over the same beat for close to ninety minutes. Hopefully, R. Kelly will at least change the music up sometime in the next 32 chapters.

paul bogdan
a&c writer
zaberriders.com kadmusarts.com

paul bogdan
a&c writer

a&c

the carillon | Jan. 5 - 11, 2012

Best movies of 2011

Really should have been called Johnny Depp Makes a Bunch of References Your Kids Wont Understand with references to Eastwood and Apocolypse Now peppered throughout. Though this CGI tale about a lizard who assumes the role of small-town sheriff was billed as a kids movie, some of the subject matter and in-jokes made the lm way more enjoyable for the adults in the audience. POM Wonderful Presents: The Greatest Movie Ever Sold Rango

Five lms you didnt see in 2011

If you play them, the sophisticated moviegoers will come

Worst movies of 2011

Atlas Shrugged Pt. 1 Ayn Rands seminal novel is often seen as a Bible for extreme objectivists. The worst bit about last years lm adaptation, besides its acting and lack of attention to detail, is that its part one of a proposed threepart trilogy. Marvel Comics has really screwed the proverbial pooch. With the Ultimate Avengers movie fast looming, Marvel is attempting to give even second-rate superheroes their own theatrical release. Thor, Captain America, and XMen: First Class were all terribly rushed, slipshod productions. At least DC only had one embarrassing feature in 2011 with The Green Lantern. Zookeeper and We Bought a Zoo (tie) Any superhero movie

Director Morgan Spurlock and crew decided to nd out what kind of a movie could be made relying on a budget comprised purely of advertising revenue. The Greatest Movie Ever Sold is that lm. Spurlocks sizeable knowledge base and wry humour makes this lm an absolute joy to watch. The Beaver After a failed suicide attempt, Walter Black (played by Mel Gibson) nds salvation in a beaver hand puppet. The beaver acts as Walters superego, and is able to verbalize Walters every thought in a way that Walter himself never could. Its a surprisingly emotionally complex lm about depression, life, love, and, ultimately, death. Horrible Bosses Everyones had them: Napoleonic sociopaths with power complexes and with seemingly no semblance of human empathy, emotion, or intelligence. Horrible Bosses is a movie about three losers who actually do something about them. The boss performances are the true beauty of this revenge-fantasycomedy, superseding magnicent bastardry and approaching cartoon villainy. This lm practically oozes childhood nostalgia. Jason Segels performance as a goofy fanboy ts right in to the Muppetverse. It has ne writing, a great soundtrack, fourth-wall moments, and the off-the-cuff cameos that the Muppets have been characterized by for 40-plus years. If Fox News is right, and the Muppets are Communists, then call me Stalin. The Muppets
cinedork.com

Consider this a call to action for Reginas theatre owners: bring

us the films that everyone else gets to see; were tired of being offered Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked at three separate theatres.
jonathan petrychyn
a&c editor 2011 was a banner year for sequels and easily consumable 3D releases. And, in all honesty, thats where most people went to for their lmic pleasure this year, and indeed, where most of Reginas movie theatres went to. But what about those other films that the rest of the world raves about, but we dont get to see in Regina until they either make their way to the RPL or until we can order the DVD from Amazon. Consider this a call to action for Reginas theatre owners: bring us the films that everyone else gets to see; were tired of being offered Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked at three separate theatres. This lm has been burning up the critics charts since it quietly made its release in December. Why all the fuss? Mostly because its the rst silent lm to be given wide release (hah, not in Regina) since the 1930s, and probably the rst silent lm to have a shot at winning an Oscar since Wings took home the trophy at the rst Academy Awards in 1929. Based on the trailer, Im not sure if this film is actually a silent film, or just a film without dialogue, as there seemed to be some nicely synchronized sound effects in the trailer. Could be a trick of the trailer, or could be an overblown love letter to Silent Hollywood. I The Artist remain skeptical about it, but it would be nice if I would have had a chance to see it. Michael Fassbender was brought to American audiences by Zak Snyder in 2006s 300, but it wouldnt be until 2009s Inglourious Basterds that he would really catch the eye of Hollywood, which led him to stellar performances in X-Men: First Class, Jane Eyre, A Dangerous Method (below), and Shame. Directed by Steve McQueen (no, not that Steve McQueen), Shame is unabashedly sexual, a lm critics are comparing to Bertoluccis Last Tango in Paris, and Midnight Cowboy, two of the most wellknown mainstream adult lms, the latter the only X-rated lm to win the Academy Award for Best Picture. Shame will probably make its way to Regina eventually despite its NC-17 rating, but probably only after Fassbender receives considerable Oscar buzz. Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy Can we all just take a moment to consider how much of a bad ass Gary Oldman is? Not only is he Sirius Black in Harry Potter, Lt. Gordon in The Dark Knight, Sid Vicious, and Dracula, hes now getting the chance to play a Cold War spy tasked with finding a mole in MI6. This may be the closest well ever get to seeing Oldman as James Bond. Shame My Week With Marilyn

Talking animals are almost a box ofce fail-safe. It was nice karma to hear that Kevin James Zookeeper fell at on its ass. Kevin James is a fat loser, and he relies on comic characters like a collar-popping douche of a gorilla to make him popular. We Bought a Zoo doesnt have talking animals, but it has Matt Damon, so its in the same spirit, and thus, the same category of spite. Shark Night 3D The poor mans teen idols all go to a summer house in the middle of the goddamn swamp where a bunch of toothless inbreds have unleashed over a hundred different breeds of shark to lm the bastard son of snuff pornography and the Discovery Channels Shark Week. Hilarity ensues.

She started as just a small-town girl on Dawsons Creek, and now Michelle Williams is an awardscaliber actress, churning out what critics are hailing as a powerhouse performance as Marilyn Monroe. This is just the first of two Marilyn Monroe films we wont be exposed to within the next 12 months, with Naomi Watts slated to play Monroe in Blonde, which is based on Joyce Carol Oates imaginary Monroe memoir. The lm is getting middling reviews, but any chance to see even a glimmer of Monroe on the screen again is worth our time. Considering how important David Cronenberg is to Canadian cinema, its surprising how small a release his lms get while shit like Score: A Hockey Musical and every goddamn film by Paul Gross gets advertisements plastered all over our screens. Sure, no one outside of the university is going to know who Carl Jung is, but that doesnt mean Regina should be deprived of Cronenbergs drama about a love triangle Sigmund Freud (Viggo Mortensen), Carl Jung (Michael Fassbender) and Sabina Spielrein (Keira Knightley). Still not sold? Its a love triangle involving Freud and Jung. Imagine the penis envy joke possibilities. A Dangerous Method

The original Straw Dogs, a 1971 Sam Peckinpah lm starring Dustin Hoffman, was largely irrelevant and needlessly violent. Straw Dogs starring James Marsden is even more irrelevant and even more needlessly violent. This is clearly just Hollywood trying to milk the teensiest bit of milk out of the namerecognition cow, no matter how sickly and ill the cow may be.

Straw Dogs

kyle leitch
contributor

kyle leitch
contributor

the carillon | Jan. 5 - 11, 2012

a&c

Best TV shows of 2011

Community This show started off with six people forming a group to study Spanish. Two and a half seasons in, the shows become a lot more. If NBC ever puts Community back in its line-up, the show is sure to bring something hilarious. (#AbedIsBatmanNow, #SixSeasonsAndAMovie, etc.) The Walking Dead

Five shows you werent watching in 2011

Since you probably dont have the mad cash for those premium channels, well fill you in on what you missed
jonathan petrychyn
a&c editor I will confess: Im about a decade behind the television times. I spent most of my Christmas break watching the last half of Buffy the Vampire Slayer and the rst season of Community. We can chalk it up to being a student and being unable to afford premium cable channels to allow me to watch the high quality television that the new Golden Age of American Television is pumping out. As such, I have to rely on what a basic cable package can offer, which means I can watch as much Whitney and New Girl as I want, but cant watch much of the programming put out by HBO, FX, or Showtime in the United States. At this time, it would seem fruitful to turn to Netix to ll in the gaps, but even then, there is usually a considerable wait before we can get a feel for what the critics and audiences have been drooling over in the United States. Here are five shows that you cant watch in Canada unless youve got the cash to subscribe to what few premium channels we can get. Treme Set in New Orleans three months after Katrina, the show follows a handful of Katrina survivors as they attempt to rebuild their lives in a New Orleans neighbourhood, Treme. The show was created by David Simon and Eric Overmeyer, the minds behind The Wire, another critically acclaimed HBO show that we are hardpressed to nd in Canada without forking over a sizable chunk of a paycheque. Homeland Following the theme of American disasters, Homeland follows Claire Daines as she tries to determine if a returning American prisoner of war was indeed turned by the enemy and is a terrorist threat. The whole terrorist shtick is getting quite tiresome, but now that fear has turned to a homegrown threat, and not some outside threat, it would be interesting to see the treatment and the dynamic between the characters. American Horror Story Chalk this up to my unabashed love for horror movies, good and bad, but Ryan Murphy and Brad Falchucks ghost story seems innitely appealing, despite middling reviews. Who doesnt want to see Dylan McDermott and Jessica Lange in a haunted house on a weekly basis? Moreover, who wouldnt want to see the suspense of a horror movie drawn out over 12 episodes? Its Always Sunny in Philadelphia

Worst TV shows of 2011

Terra Nova Idea: A show about restarting civilization by going back in time to the prehistoric era. Will there be dinosaurs? Of course. Budget per episode: estimated $4 million. Status: Most likely cancelled. Result: Money plus Spielbergs name does not necessarily equal quality television. Glee

With the gross factor turned all the way up, the aftermath of a zombie apocalypse has never been more terrifying. Warning: never eat while watching this show. The rotting esh of the living dead, with the addition of zombie heads constantly being bashed in or shot, is almost too much to handle on an empty stomach. Fringe

Apparently this show has been broadcasting on Showcase for a while now, but because its mandated to run only Canadian content until 10 p.m.; most of us wont see it. The show is currently in its seventh season, and it still hasnt surfaced on Netix or on any other easily viewable station. Simply speaking, its a show about assholes being assholes. That should be reason enough for it to appear on Netix instead of all eight seasons of Charmed. Martin Scorcese directed the pilot of this HBO series, and its been eating up awards and accolades ever since. Set in prohibition era Atlantic City, it appears to be a political fable for the ages. And how nice is it to say that it stars Steve Buscemi? This guy has been quietly character acting his way through his career and now stars as a corrupt treasurer. If Netix is going to keep suggesting I watch new episodes of Bones, it has to at the very least give me this shows pilot episode. Boardwalk Empire

The show that makes everyone remember music existed before their generation. Plus, the story lines are terribly inconsistent. It seems like all characters on the show share some sort of short-term memory loss and any betrayal is completely forgotten by the next episode. Except for that pregnancy in the rst season. No one seems to let that go. A Gifted Man

A show that started off as a case-of-the-week/monsterof-the-week show turned into a show about multiple universes, multiple timelines, time travel, and what people will do for the ones they love. The intriguing storylines make this underrated show extremely engrossing. Sherlock (BBC)

A wealthy doctor is haunted by his ex-wife, who teaches him to be a better person. I couldnt make it past the rst 15 minutes of the pilot episode. The woman is way too cheery to be an exwife and dead. Ex-wives and the supernatural dont exactly share a pleasant reputation. Jersey Shore

The best small-screen adaptation of Holmes adventures yet. Benedict Cumberbatchs portrayal of the famous detective is as close to perfection as one could possibly get. Suits

The phrase, If you cant say anything nice, dont say anything at all comes to mind. This year the crew went to Italy. Has anyone apologized to Italy yet? Toddlers & Tiaras

Havent you ever wanted to get a dream job without doing any of the work yet be perfectly capable to do the job? This show is about a college dropout becoming a lawyer at one of the biggest law rms in New York City without ever going to law school. Can you say, Living the dream?

Every six-year-old needs a healthy spray tan. It just helps to express a childs inner beauty. I heard somewhere that beauty is immeasurable. Not according to this show. Apparently it can be measured. The proof is in that shiny plastic crown at the end of the competition.

kristen mcewen
contributor

kristen mcewen
contributor

cereseaeasttnsoktawetcrnnapynaaedtdahbgaoneit ecnpehsmnotesnbskinscetvsnggty ntnetssft nfusnreaha didnttmakerourmywspeoaall as acnnghenea scbennoetrutahersimvpt u d aof rotiaartprepicks ehettt slists?a eayaua u ao a o d t ie o w e o oil i u music/movie/tv d lc w l ki tough! but by n dreihoehsghodawauaarnaoreonaejccomments.csatn refdyourdosyetstahnsul atei ncpinocmssle epo p iov uks ceihpdhcuit glcthekl prtn c is tk tacko en t uh- o a i and w n lah aiga i tnahe h tvisit carillonregina.com i ue s ls t to s means, ie ce l y a hs w i io l t

10 a&c

the carillon | Jan. 5 - 11, 2012

Keeping it gay
Should queer culture continue to buy into itself, or shake it up?
cant think straight
jonathan petrychyn
a&c editor Roger DeBris, the flamboyantly gay director in the 2005 remake The Producers, sings a song about keep[ing] it gay in times of murder, mayhem, or rage. And on the tail of the rst civil unions in Hawaii in the New Year, and with the increasing controversy surrounding of queer politics in the Republican primaries, its easy to suggest that 2012 could be the year that we should keep it gay and that we need to, to borrow someone elses words, stay the course within queer culture. But as shows like Glee and Modern Family continue to cement their status as shows with supposedly gay positive representations of their queer characters, and as queer characters become more ubiquitous within heteronormative mainstream American culture, should we continue to stay the course, or do we need to reconsider what it means to be gay in contemporary society? As we enter the new year, this is the question queers all across North America need to be asking themselves. If your goal is acceptance, then you arent going to get anywhere assimilating yourself within the culture. Nor are you going to get anywhere alienating heterosexual culture with extreme gender play and queer activity, especially if your goal is to establish queerness as a viable alternative to the heteronormative culture that we live in. But, even then, nding a middle ground is problematic, as entering the centre almost certainly means buying into that culture youre trying to change.

ladyofthecake.com

Sure, Roger Debris can keep it gay, but does that mean the rest of us should be? But that isnt necessarily a bad thing. If you want to change the world, you have to do it on the worlds terms. But that doesnt mean that you should refer to your same-sex partner as your husband or wife. When you start using gendered terms like that to denote the masculine half and the feminine half of a samesex couple, youre kind of defeating your own subversion by buying into the culture that you nd so oppressive. But then to go to the other extreme; if you become wholly gender and sexuality non-conforming, presenting a body and a culture that is alienating to the rest of the society, its questionable how much good you are doing. In the face of such problems, how does one find the centre? Moreover, is the centre a space we want to occupy? If the queer community if such a community can even exist in the face of such dispersal and division is to continue pushing for rights, acceptance, and intolerance, then it needs to take a hard look at how its going to do it. Indeed, each individual queer person needs to take a hard look at their approach to queer and ask themselves, Is this truly the best way to present my culture and my self to the culture around me? Are representations of queer like heteronormative-based couples on Glee and Modern Family, where love is considered optimum and any attempts at true queerness are quickly shot down truly the way the community needs to go, or does it need to take a more radical approach, and present shows even queerer than a drag show? If you want a queer New Years resolution, resolve to reconsider what queer means to you, and to take a hard look at what you think queer should be. If queer looks like what looks like on Glee, just remember Kurts words from Season 2: Bisexual is a term that gay guys in high school use when they wanna hold hands with girls and feel like a normal person for a change. If 2012s queer culture looks like that if 2012s queer culture is a culture that celebrates gay men and women but ignores bisexuals, transgender folk, and other sexual minorities count me out of it.

If 2012s queer culture is a culture that celebrates gay men and women but ignores bisexuals, transgender folk, and other sexual minorities, count me out of it.

Kyle Leitchs Christmas vacation

Its never too early to start thinking about how you should spend next Christmas
Arts Radar
Fur Eel Dead of Winter Tour The German Club Jan. 5 8 p.m. $5 Indigo Joseph OHanlons Jan. 6 10 p.m. No cover Greg Rekus with Jon Creeden and the Ghostwrite The Exchange Jan. 5 9 p.m. Beethoven for Winds Government House Jan. 7 and 8 8 p.m. Saturday, 3 p.m. Sunday $24.50 - $41.50

kyle leitch
contributor The turkey is gone, the presents are unwrapped, everybody hates everybody once again Christmas is finally over. Aside from the standard holiday chaos, heres what Kyle Leitch, the resident A&C cynic, was up to this holiday season. Stuart McLean & The Vinyl Cafe Live

wit and indie rock. Since the CBC was there taping for the Christmas radio special, Stuart also got to have some fun goong on his technical producer. Make an effort to see this show next Christmas! Holiday Specials: The Leitch Edition

Yule log. What says holidays more than sinking dozens of hours into many, many video games? The ol Playstation got quite a workout this holiday. Yours truly attained platinum trophies in both inFamous games, American McGees Alice: Madness Returns, Flower, and Heavy Rain. Who needs a social life when youve got the warm glow of a television to keep you company? Robin Hood at the Globe Theatre Platinum Trophies

Stuart McLean has been writing Vinyl Cafe stories since 1994. If you havent heard Mr. McLeans monotone voice vividly bringing his stories about Dave and Morley and their hilarious mishaps alive, then you have been missing out. Stuart McLean and Hawksley Workman entertained the sold-out Conexus Arts Center with a combination of dry

Most people stick to a traditional fare of Christmas movies and specials to warm the cockles of their hearts. Me, I do things a bit differently. While most people are shedding a tear when James Stewart tells Clarence that he wants to live again, Im watching Bruce Willis detonate Alan Rickman to the tune of Blue Christmas in Die Hard. Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang, Eight Crazy Nights, and Bad Santa are the Christmas features on show at my house. Provisions are made for The Grinch, A Christmas Story, and the

the rest of the cast, something about this play just didnt add up for me. I know the Christmas play is always supposed to be kidfriendly, but there is such a thing as going too far. Also, can someone enlighten me as to why they always seem to have the villains of the play talking about the Food Bank drive after the show? Reading a book Sometimes, the strain technology puts on the eyes and mind gets to great. Sometimes, its nice to sit in front of the Yule log and read a good book. With it being Christmas, I finally picked up David Sedaris Holidays on Ice. Compared to Sedaris, my familys particular brand of crazy seems normal. And isnt needless competition and bad craziness what the holidays are really about after all?

Is it just me, or has the quality at the Globe Theatre been slipping, as of late? Between Prince Johns Barbara Walters-esque speech impediment, the absolute villainy of the Sheriff of Nottingham, faked archery, and general smugness of

features
aceshowbiz.com

Features Editor: Dietrich Neu features@carillonregina.com the carillon | Jan. 5 - 11, 2012

the year to end all years

If you believe predictions of the apocalpyse based on the end of the Mayan calendar are right and, lets face it, who wouldnt believe the wild prognostications of a bunch of shed-dwelling tinfoil-hat Internet weirdos over the reasonable protests of the eggheads on the National Aeronautics and Space Administration website who claim that credible scientists worldwide know of no threat associated with 2012 then you are one of the few people willing to bear witness to the true knowledge that we as a planet have less than 365 days left on this mortal coil. Archeologists and anthropologists believe that the disappearance of the Mayan culture itself could have been the results of any number of factors: overpopulation and subsequent environmental catastrophe; disease; a peasant uprising; and more. Its rather eerie spooky, even that these are all familiar circumstances of living in the 21st century. So the staff of the Carillon sat down to gure out which of these, exactly, is going to be the big pillow that the universe uses to smother our collective face in 2012, the match that burns humanitys house down so the cosmos can cash in on the insurance money, the cut brake line that, on Dec. 21 of this short year, slams us into an existential concrete wall. Our advice: stock up on beans, and if you think you might become a mutant, dont saw off that shotgun just yet. Mutants with sawn-off shotguns are just the pits. /John Cameron Harper calls on Eric Bana to call his Romulan buddies to drill to the centre of the Earth, so he can send in Hilary Swank and Aaron Eckhart to detonate nuclear weapons to restart the rotation of the Earths core. Unsurprisingly, this doesnt work, mostly because Romulans dont exist. The reversal of the poles takes down all satellite communication, throwing the world into chaos. The media, unwilling to let the 24-hour news cycle stop, resort to Dixie cups and string to communicate. Prime Minister Harper, in a panic, detonates the WMDs he had been hiding underneath 24 Sussex since 2006, technically declaring war on the United States. But since he can only communicate via an elaborate line of Dixie Cups, by the time his declaration of war reached President Obama, it had devolved into I am Stanley the cat, and I am declaring kittens on dog. Ironically, the fallout from the nuclear weapons causes the worlds cats and dogs to be mutated into intelligent beings, and an all-out war between cats and dogs consumes the world. Those rounded by controversy. Of the 573 patients who have been infected with a non-mutated strain of H5N1, 60 per cent of the cases were fatal. Critics claim this Armageddon virus should never have been developed, or that it should have been developed in a military setting. As well, the United States government has urged scientific journals not to publish details on the research, in the fear that terrorist organizations can use the information to develop biological weapons of mass destruction. Fear of epidemic diseases is nothing new. In 2005, scientists recreated the Spanish u, and no pandemic resulted. When there was an outbreak of the H1N1 virus, the public again panicked, and hand sanitizer sales went skyrocketing. If a pandemic strikes, the fear of the disease itself not the disease will be to blame. Antibiotic misuse is increasing the number of drug-resistant bacteria, or superbugs. Often, if a patient starts feeling better, he or she doesnt nish taking the full prescription of antibiotics, letting surviving bacteria develop a resistance to the drug, resulting in a new strain that isnt treatable. Compounding this, as a 2006 study in Annals of humans who survived the nuclear holocaust, and who werent taken by the cats and dogs as pets, retreat underground to live as mole people. /Jonathan Petrychyn If there is one thing that all humans love, its sex. Without our powerful libidos, we would have no motivation to propagate our species or invent all the wonderful things that help our species survive, like language, or cars that compensate for the size of our pensies. In a ruthless environment like the prehistoric wild, an intense drive to reproduce was a must for survival. With each species competing for survival, replicating in mass numbers was the best way to ensure dominance. Well, mission accomplished, humanity. Weve won. Humans are the most dominant species on the planet by far we kill, enslave, and eat almost every other animal, we bulldoze natural plant life to build more comfortable living space, and we Family Medicine points out, patients increasingly expect antibiotic treatment for routine infections such as strep throat. The fear of a pandemic apocalypse is leading people to take more antibiotics, which in turn is increasing the development of the superbugs that people are so desperately paranoid about. If the world is going to end from an epidemic outbreak in 2012, its not going to come from a laboratory; its going to come from the unnished pill bottles in our medicine cabinets. /Julia Dima

Systemic ecological collapse

Geomagnetic Reversals Lead to Nuclear Kittens

Sometime ate in 2012, the Earth will experience a massive reversal of its magnetic poles, a reversal that occurs almost overnight, flouting all of natural sciences predictions and sciences, causing mass societal distress, birds flying into fountains, and kittens scratching their owners eyes out. This geomagnetic reversal, it is discovered, was caused when the Earths core stopped rotating like the Mayans said it would, or something. In an attempt at saving the world, Prime Minister to justice. Seeing this as a campaign opportunity, Rick Perry promises that if he wins the US presidential election, he will rain hellre upon Canada for oppressing white Christians by eliminating its Godgiven right to Facebook. Rick Perry wins in a landslide and goes on to nuke the piss out of Montreal, and Toronto, Vancouver, the only Canadian cities he knows offhand. Stephen Harper orders retaliatory action, but our aging eet of ghter jets collapses and our military has to sit out the conflicts between America and Canadas shared allies that inevitably engulf the globe, and nuclear war engulfs the planet. /Paul Bogdan In late 2011, a team of Dutch and American scientists developed an extremely contagious airborne mutation of the H5N1 bird flu virus at the Erasmus Medical Centre in Denmark. The new strain of bird u could potentially lead to the development of vaccines that could prevent pandemics from emerging. Although many scientists argue that the benefits of the work with the virus outweigh the risks, it is sur-

have become so powerful that we can even destroy the entire ecosystem. Hooray! Now its time to stop. Unfortunately, human libido doesnt simply disappear when we are no longer in danger of going extinct. These days, were pumping out babies faster then ever. And we are in real danger of fucking our way into oblivion. Scientists at University College London have stated that humans are 10,000 times more common than we should be. We are already experiencing a lack of fresh water, excessive consumption of natural resources, and changes in the composition of the environment. If you ask me, its time to throw some Black Death back into society and get our numbers down or at least wear condoms. If we dont, scientists estimate that, by the end of the century, the earth will no longer be able to support us. /Dietrich Neu

Among other things, the United States proposed Stop Online Privacy Act, currently being heard in Congress, grants American courts the power to shut down websites that host links to online piracy. If it passes, itll be the catalyst for global collapse. A Canadian tween posts a link to a torrent of his favourite band on his friends Facebook page. Because the link is on Facebook, Facebook ends up getting shut down People lose their minds. Without the ability to cyberstalk people on Facebook, people turn to stalking other people in real life, because whats the difference really. The economy collapses because people call in sick so they can follow around people they kind of knew in high school, who are themselves stalking friends of friends they met at a party once. Protesters gather around the world to call for the return of Facebook so that people can go back to just cyber-stalking their coworkers. Eventually this turns into demanding that the Canadian tween who caused Facebooks shutdown be brought

The collapse of the Internet

Peasant revolt

Epidemic Deceases

How close are we in the west to an old-fashioned bread riot? Young people are increasingly unemployed and broke. Meanwhile, plenty of rich folks have emerged from the last six years of economic downturn not only still rich, but with a lack of perspective and introspection that would set Marie Antoinette trying to gure out how much yeast she needs for a sourdough starter. (Example: Republican presidential candidate and pizza magnate Herman Cain suggested to the media last year that unemployed people should go get jobs, fundamentally misunderstanding what

a recession entails). Strings of riots and protests not only Occupy Wall Street, but the increasingly brutal G8 and G20 protests of the last decade, the riots in London during August of this year, and more are relatively commonplace, with disaffected youths seeking the agency denied them by democracies shot through with the inuence of corporate power. You want an apocalyptic scenario? Here it is: none of this changes. The unemployed youth of the global northwest stop protesting and start rioting en masse, leading to concurrent antitax protests that themselves turn into riots, which lead to civil wars. The world left standing consists of shattered NATO countries, still-developing Arab and African states, and global superpowers China, India, and Brazil. The ancient Greek word apocalypse meant revelation. What the nation-rending civil unrest of 2012 will reveal is that no society that ties power directly to wealth can possibly hope to survive. And if you thought an apocalypse would be the end of the whole world, rather than just the end of the world as we know it, maybe youre part of the problem. /John Cameron

12 features

the carillon | Jan. 5 - 11, 2012

Living the dream

Traveling to Winnipeg to cover the Jets

All photos were taken by Natasha Tersigni

autumn mcdowell
sports editor When news editor Natasha Terisigni and I were presented with the opportunity to get some

first hand NHL coverage, we jumped at it. The closest thing that Regina has to an NHL team is the Winnipeg Jets; naturally, we wanted a piece of the action. Tickets to two NHL games would have been exciting, but

what we got was mind-blowing. We each had a media pass, which basically means that you are a boss and can do and go wherever the hell you want inside the rink. With just one flash of that pass you are granted access anywhere. Plus you feel pretty cool. We watched the Jets take on both the Montreal Canadiens and the Pittsburgh Penguins from the press box but the action didnt stop there. We also had full home

and away locker room access after the games to talk to the players. Thats where the fun really began. After the games we sprinted down five flights of stairs and burst into the locker-room with all of the other media and crowded around the three or so players that the team decided to bring out to the media. Tanner Glass, Blake Wheeler, and MarcAndre Fleury were just a few of the players we spoke with after

the games. Getting a chance to interview the players, watch the game from the press box, and attend the coaches press conference was unbelievable. Career in sports journalism, here I (hopefully) come.

THE CATS OUTTA THE BAGPIPES

Theres a new pub in town and were tend to our patrons.
If ye look dashin in plaid, give us a dingle.

Jets vs. Canadiens

With a sold-out crowd as per usual, and more media in attendance since the home opener, the Winnipeg Jets delivered. We wanted to have a good start; you know the kind of struggles that [Montreal has] been going through over there and you want to put the foot on the gas and make it as tough of a night on them as we can, said Regina native Tanner Glass. We know with our crowd it is going to be a long night here in this building. Just over two minutes into the rst period, Montreal defenceman Hal Gill was assessed a double minor after his stick connected with his opponents face. That penalty would prove to be costly, as it took just 24 second for Blake Wheeler to sneak one past Carey Price on the man advantage. Glass put the home team up by two midway through the rst frame when he nished off a play set up by Kyle Wellwood and Nik Antropov. The goal by Glass brought his season tally up to four, tying his career high in goals (four) and points (11). Although Glass hit a personal milestone with the goal, he was quick to give most of the credit to his teammates, in particular his fellow defencemen. We wanted to make sure we were really tight defensively, Glass said. When you are tight defensively, you end up getting chances, so it works both ways. Its always nice to score, so its good. The Jets used the momentum built in the first to give themselves a three-goal cushion, as Wheeler plotted his second goal of the night just 39 seconds into the second period. Well, I think the puck was rolling a bit, so I got a little fortunate there; I kind of bobbled it to myself and was able to pick a corner, Wheeler said of his second goal. It felt really good to get a goal, especially when you look up and you have hit your spot. Just 30 seconds shy of the midway point, Jets assistant captain Chris Thorburn also received a major for high-sticking, but due to an excellent penalty kill and brilliant goaltending by Ondrej Pavelec, the Jets came out of the penalty unscaved. Pavs and the PK in my opinion were the stars of the game, Wheeler offered. We took more penalties than we would like to. They did a great job winning battles, clearing pucks, doing all those little things; your goalie has to be your best penalty killer and he certainly was tonight.

Date: December 22 Jets: 4 Canadiens: 0

Although the Canadiens were just 20 minutes away from their fth-consecutive loss, the urgency just wasnt in their step in the third. To add insult to injury, Tim Stapleton made it a four-goal margin on a pass from Wheeler. Wheeler may not have gotten the hat trick, but hell take the win any day. It was a really nice gesture by coach to try and get the third one, but it wasnt meant to be, Wheeler said. To be honest with you, I would much rather have a guy like Timmy Stapleton put a goal in the net than for me to get a hat trick. Those are the kind of guys that are able to battle for you every night, and anytime that they are able to put one in the net it denitely makes the win a little bit sweeter. The Canadiens went home with another loss on their record, and numerous factors to point the finger at. The loss could be because there penalty kill was not clicking, or because PK Subban was a healthy scratch, or it could be because they played Chicago just one night before. But the most likely reason of all may be that the crowd at the MTS Centre was simply too much for them to handle.

584.6301 knottedthistle.ca Or come see us at the Travelodge 4177 Albert St.

the carillon | Jan. 5 - 11, 2012

features 13

Jets vs. Penguins

The Jets were hoping to take the momentum they had gained in Game 1 and translate it to game 2 when the Pittsburgh Penguins were in town. Both teams were hungry for a win heading into the Christmas break, and the hometown Jets knew it was going to be a difcult two points. We know Pittsburgh and what players they have and what they are capable of, Wheeler said. We definitely cant make the little mistakes against them and we are just going to have to keep things simple and set the pace early. Midway through the frame, Tanner Glass and Penguins tough guy Arron Asham decided to dance at centre ice. It was an entertaining bout, as both players are quite evenly matched, but as the refs stepped in to break it up the decision victory was awarded to Glass. The Penguins finally lit the lamp with six minutes left in the rst as Joe Vitale stepped up for the visitors. Despite only mustering two shots in the rst nine minutes of the first period, the Jets managed to tie things up midway through the second when Alexander Burmistrov blasted a shot from the left circle. Although the Pens and Jets sat even on the scoreboard, the shot count was far from even as the Penguins more than doubled the Jets 26-12. I think that the guy that was counting the shots was sleeping a lot of the time Penguins goalie Marc-Andre Fleury said with a laugh. But in the second it was quiet, so it was slow back there, but I think it was good. I just had to try and stay focused and be ready for the next shot. Whatever Dan Bylsma, head coach of the Pittsburgh Penguins, said to his team during intermission must have been gold, as it took James Neal just 22 seconds to give his team the lead. After that, it was all Penguins. With under ve minutes remaining in regulation, Jordan Stall and Pascal Dupuis scored just 50 seconds apart on route to the teams thirdstraight victory. Great timing, Vitale said of the win. Obviously guys are

Date: December 23 Jets: 4 Penguins: 1

pumped up for the Christmas break and to get the three wins, it was a hell of a trip. Despite the lopsided score, the fans at the MTS Centre never stopped, especially when it came to hounding Fleury. It was pretty loud, Fleury said. Its a fun building to play in; theyre really loud and the whole game they were cheering and being loud, so it was fun. Bylsma also took note of the cheers against Fleury, but even he admitted that it was to be expected coming into hostile territory. I think that is standard operating procedure for the fans here, he said. They get on the goalie and the star players from the other team. We kind of knew going in that every time [Evgeni Malkin] touched the puck they were going to boo pretty loudly. The two days rest the Jets were given served the team well as they earned two-straight wins against the Colorado Avalanche and Los Angeles Kings. Tonight they make the trip to Toronto to take on the Maple Leafs.

Autumns press-box etiquette

1. Do dress to impress. Always dress nicer than you think you should. Just a heads up: all the guys wear suits and all the girls wear blazers. Make the purchase.

and wish that you had it to t in. 4. Dont cheer loudly when the opposing team, even if its been your favourite since childhood, scores a goal. As a matter of fact, dont cheer at all; a golf clap is acceptable and thats about it.

2. Dont interview players in the press box. Players are fussy about being interviewed while in the press box, but if you make it known that you want to ask them about something other than the current game or injuries, they will be more likely to talk to you.

3. Do bring your laptop. Even if you dont plan on typing a single thing, if you dont bring a laptop you will be the only one without one

5. Dont yell obscenities. Even though the chances are pretty good that the goalie will commit a robbery or that a ref will make a terrible call on more than one occasion, avoid yelling swears at the top of your lungs at all costs. You arent in front of your TV here, people; save that stuff for the comfort of your own home.

sports

Sports Editor: Autumn McDowell sports@carillonregina.com the carillon | Jan. 5 - 11, 2012

ducks.ocregister.com

Did Corey Perrys 50-goal performance top your 2011 sports memories list?

ROUNDTABLE
Favourites of 2011 and predictions for 2012
autumn mcdowell, edward dodd, colton hordichuk, dietrich neu, taylor shire
this weeks roundtable McDowell: Personally, it would have to be covering the Winnipeg Jets vs. Montreal Canadiens and Pittsburgh Penguins. Seeing the entire Penguins team naked wasnt bad, either. sports memory of 2011? what the hell else would we be talking about then the answer has to be the womens basketball team. If its going to nally bring home that goddamn national championship, this is the year to do it. That is, as long as the players dont choke. that moves and I love that grinder style of play. But my real vote is going to either Wedgewood or Stone. Wedgewood looks way stronger than Visentin so far, and Stone is lighting the lamp every game. nor concussions more and more to the fore. Hordichuk: Whether its increased shoulder pad or helmet protection, I think the 2012-13 campaign will see some equipment modications meant to reduce concussions. My guess is 15; anything more than zero is high, but the NHL just isnt what it used to be back when the likes of Scott Stevens and Cam Neely once ruled the ice surface. Neu: Probably many more than will be reported. Concussions are inevitable in full-contact sports like hockey. The thing about concussions is that, unlike injuries to joints or muscles, many athletes feel like they can still play. Moreover, unless you are Sidney Crosby, missing ice time only gives an opportunity for someone else to take your job. Shire: Sure, the game is faster and the players are stronger, but concussions are more relevant because everyone is more aware of them. Back in the old days, if a player got corked in the head, he would go to the bench seeing stars, grab a shot of water, and shake it off. Then he would get right back out there and nish the game, even though he might be a little woozy. Now, we have a quiet room and all that jazz. Player safety is at the top of the list for the NHL. What is your New Years resolution? Neu: I would have to say Mark Stone. He is one of the teams top scorers, and he is on a hot streak right now. Last time I checked, he was still leading the WHL in scoring, after being out of WHL action for almost three weeks. People like Stone stepping up to the plate is what Canada needs with Devante Smith-Pelly out of action. Shire: There are a lot of character players on the team, but I think the teams success depends on scoring. With seven goals in the first four games, Mark Stone is my pick. How many NHL players will get concussions in 2012?

Dietrich Neu: I do not even make New Years resolutions anymore, because I have never successfully pulled one off. If I cannot get my shit together normally, then why would I magically turn things around when a few numbers on a calendar change? With that said: stop smoking, exercise more, work harder at school, etc. Taylor Shire: I never make them. If you really want to change something in your life, just do it now. Its pretty simple. What was your favourite

Colton Hordichuk: Every new year I cut a fast food chain out of my diet. Last year, I went without McDonalds, and I think this year Im going to cut out either Dairy Queen or A&W. I guess this relates to my fitness, right? I also think it would be great to get back into the sports I quit but once enjoyed like lacrosse, volleyball, and dirt biking.

Edward Dodd: My New Years resolution is to actually do something physical at least once. But not right away, probably in June or July, sometime long after everyone else has broken their resolution to go to the gym every day.

Autumn McDowell: I have honestly never made a New Years resolution, or maybe I have but Ive just forgotten about it the very next week, which is entirely possible. I have goals, obviously, but I wouldnt say theyre resolutions. Yes, they are two very different things in my mind.

Dodd: My favourite sports memory of 2011 is of the three glorious weeks after Ken Miller replaced Greg Marshall, during which the Riders won three straight games. My subsequent worst memory is of the failure that was the rest of their season after that.

Dodd: Im going to go out on a limb and say the womens curling team will become CIS champions again. I believe it is the only team that even comes close usually.

Shire: The Riders laying a beat down on the Bombers in both the Labour Day and Banjo Bowl. It was sweet to go to Winnipeg and come out on the winning side. The Bomber fans were pretty quiet after that happened. Which Cougars team will have the best season in 2012?

Neu: Watching mixed martial artist Jon Fitch get knocked out in 12 seconds this past Friday. Fitch is one of the most boring ghters in MMA, but he is also practically unbeatable. This has forced MMA fans to watch what has amounted to hours of lackluster bouts. Fitch deserved a good smack to the face.

Hordichuk: Easily my favourite sports memories are Corey Perrys 50-goal season and Teemu Selannes return. Its always a treat to see one of your favourite players win the scoring race in the NHL, and I think Teemu is the only Duck on the posters in my room thats still on the current roster. I dont even want to talk about his retirement. With the way the Ducks are playing this year, its become a touchy subject. We suck and need him.

Neu: The womens basketball team, hands down. It opened the season as the No. 1 team in the country and currently sits 7-0. Success breeds enthusiasm, and no doubt these girls are taking their season very seriously. I predict more of the same in 2012. Shire: When I get this Cougar beer pong team organized, we are going to have a very successful rst season. Who will be Team Canadas MVP at the World Juniors?

Hordichuk: All of them! Actually, I hope football. Its a big part of the university, city, and Saskatchewan sports in general.

McDowell: None other than Mark Hands of Stone Stone. I guess its not a blatantly obvious choice; its not like hes tied for the most goals and points in the tournament oh, wait, yes he is. Dodd: Its totally going to be Mark Stone. His awesome showing in the rst game of the round robin and his key goal against the United States on New Years Eve, combined with what I am sure will be a stellar performance during the playoffs, will easily make him Canadas MVP.

Dodd: Its likely going to be a number much higher than weve been seeing previously, as ofcials take hits more seriously and the resulting scrutiny brings even mi-

McDowell: Too many. One is too many, and there will surely be more than one. The number of concussions that have popped up in the last couple of weeks alone is unreal, and that trend will likely continue into 2012.

[My favourite sports memory of 2011] would

have to be covering the Winnipeg Jets vs. Montreal Canadiens and Pittsburgh Penguins. Seeing the entire Penguins team naked wasnt bad either.
Autumn McDowell

McDowell: If were talking best in terms of championships and

Hordichuk: My inner Darcy Hordichuk wants to say Boone Jenner. That guy hits everything

the carillon | Jan. 5 - 11, 2012

sports 15

Resolution or unrealistic goal?

U of R student athletes share their goals for the New Year

Jarrett Crowe

This play inspired two athletes resolutions November. If anyone is interested in apocalypse preparation, feel free to contact the Carillon regarding my contact information. May God help us all. My New Years resolution is to treat every day like it is Jan. 1, stay on top of tasks, and not lose sight of the main goal. Its [an] Olympic year! Let the magic begin! Carter Selinger, hockey Only spend one hour a day sending Brendan Fraser fan mail. Remove the more dangerous S&M acts from my repertoire. Learn to play the didgeridoo. Stop taking my clothes off every time it is getting hot in here. Find out what figgy pudding is. Kill the Kardashians. Solve the mystery of who let the dogs out. Be a better teammate, friend, and quit worrying about what people think about me and just be me. My New Years resolution is to keep happy. Enjoy every day as much as the last. While there are moments for seriousness, I never like to take myself too seriously. Its important to enjoy the journey and not to sweat the small stuff. Also, I would like to figure out Jessica Winter, swimming Erika Brown, swimming why the Kin building is a black hole when it comes to cell service. Connor Bloom, track and eld Being a rookie this year, my rst resolution would have to be always working to get faster and stronger and eventually trying to compete at the CanWest and CIS championship level. For the social aspect, one of my goals is to be best Movember participant that I can possibly be. Frankie Gray, football One New Years resolution I have is to gain 15 pounds of mainly muscle before the next football season so I dont get eaten by [defensive] linemen on opposing teams. The other resolution I have is to change my diet to help gain the 15 pounds and live healthier. Hillary Lerat, hockey I have a sweet tooth and love anything with lots of sugar in it. I plan on eating less sugar and more vegetables. I would also like to say I will not leave my assignments and studying to the last minute, but I think thats just wishful thinking. Jamir Walker, football Well, to be honest, my New Years resolution is to actually attend classes in the morning and do homework on a regular basis. Now that the NBA has started up again, there is almost always over six games a night, so I will probably always be up watching those games, so I may have to put a hold on the homework department. But who can blame me, right? Its the NBA! Go Heat! (Fan well before the trade.) Rebecca Rink, volleyball My New Years resolution is to enjoy my last four months of university as I prepare to get settled down into my career as a teacher, as well as have a strong second half of volleyball to nish off my career as a CIS player. John Lendvoy, wrestling At this point, I dont plan on setting a resolution. That is something I havent done since I cant remember and I dont plan on doing it this year either As far as my wrestling goals, New Years falls right in the heart of our season, so its not really an ideal time to make a major change in the way I am living my life. I usually set goals at the end of our season and make changes over the summer. My New Years resolutions are the following: cut down on the diet pop as well as rened sugar. Im on a real health kick. Im also going to make a conscious effort to not bug the Kin academic advisors every week. Alison Jestadt, track and eld I guess one of my goals for the year would be to worry less about and enjoy more of the random things thrown into life. Rihab Birama, wrestling I dont have any plans for 2012, but just looking for another great year. [Im] just hoping to accomplish something in wrestling Im training hard so I can at least accomplish something in the future. Kelly Wiebe, track and eld As the distance captain of the track/cross team, my resolution for 2012 is to produce a crop of runners that, one, continues to Chris Bodnar, football wow women with our studly endurance capabilities, and, two, wows everyone else with our CIS cross country team championship banner hanging in the rafters. Jorgen Hus, football I think any football players goals in the off-season and new year is of course to get bigger, stronger, faster. If you were to ask Chris Bodnar, however, he would probably ask for something like, Laces out, please. I am just trying to get as consistent as I can be as a long snapper, and focus on nutrition a lot more as well. Dagmar Anderson, track and eld

ed kapp
sports writer According to the infallible Wikipedia, a New Years resolution is a commitment that a person makes to one or more lasting personal goals, projects, or the reforming of a habit, which must be reached by the next New Year. In the spirit of the season, the Carillon caught up with a number of University of Regina student athletes during the break to see what if any resolutions they made for 2012. New Years is a time of reection into ones priorities. My foremost priority is survival. As the apocalypse approaches exactly a day less than a year from when Im writing my resolution is to step up my preparation in an aggressive manner. This means stocking non-perishables, other survival gear, and, most importantly, weapons. [Prime Minister Stephen Harper] committing to slash the long-gun registry was an early Christmas for me. My preparation is as all-encompassing as possible, because the exact circumstance of the apocalypse is unknown. Im currently working on a boat, a bomb shelter, and a hot air balloon. Im hoping to have all these finished by next Gaelan Malloy, wrestling

My New Years resolution for 2012 would have to be to stretch way more than I do now and also to try and read more! Jared Janotta, basketball, football

New Years resolution for basketball: take names, win games, make playoffs! See what happens then. For football off-season, New Years resolution would be get [Marc Mueller] healthy and teach him how to slide before next year! Marc Mueller, football To slide feet-first instead of throwing shoulder-rst. Joanna Zalesiak, basketball After reflecting on 2011, I truly think there are a few areas of my life that need some serious improvements. I analyzed all of them in detail and chose the most important one which is closest to my heart. My New Years resolution is to be a better intramural referee.

Only spend one hour a day sending Brendan

Fraser fan mail. Stop taking my clothes off every time it is getting hot in here. Find out what figgy pudding is. Kill the Kardashians. Solve the mystery of who let the dogs out.
Carter Selinger

16 sports

the carillon | Jan. 5 - 11, 2012

Beware of Hicks
The Rams defensive lineback

Pinnacle
The U of R womens basketball team is at the top of its game

Jarrett Crowe

Akiem Hicks enjoying another sack lunch Although the contest is an American football game, players from the Canadian university football system have annually been invited to participate since the mid 1980s. In the past decade, former Rams Jason Clermont, Brendon LaBatte, and Jordan Sisco have represented the U of R. Over the course of the past 85 years, more than 60 Pro Football Hall of Fame members not including future inductees like Tom Brady and Brett Favre have participated in the game. Net proceeds from the event, which is sponsored by the Nobles of the Mystic Shrine, are earmarked to some of the fraternal groups charitable enterprises, including the Shriners Hospitals for Children. The signicance of the game in which several legendary defensive linemen have played in over the years isnt lost on Hicks. Its such a long history, such a deep history, noted Hicks, 22. Im proud even to be invited. To be thought of and for them to want me to be a part of this game is an honour. It was something that was unexpected and something that Ive been looking forward to since I got the news. Hicks, one of three CIS playerrepresentatives set to make the trip south of the border in the coming weeks, is hoping to make the most of his time in Florida, where delegates from all 32 National Football League squads are to congregate. This is basically a tryout, Hicks said with a laugh. Im not going to do anything but attempt to bring my A-game. I feel its a great opportunity to showcase my talents for the game. Looking past the East-West Shrine Game, Hicks intends to play football on Sundays instead of watching the game from his couch in the near future. My biggest goal is to play at the next level, said Hicks, who passed on a contract offer from the Toronto Argonauts to finish his degree in business marketing in Regina. Every person that straps on a pair of football pads has dreams of playing at that level, Hicks said. Whether theyre from Canada or Sacramento, California, they have that same dream. I hope that Im able to accomplish it.

ed kapp
sports writer Akiem Hicks, a member of the University of Regina Rams, jokes that on Sundays during the football season, his family knows where they can usually nd him; stationed on the couch watching the game he loves. According to Hicks, his afnity for football is nothing new. It was always an ambition of mine to play football, but I couldnt play when I was younger, because I was always too big, recounted Hicks, who now stands at six-foot-ve and weighs in at over 300 pounds. I started playing football in my freshman year of high school. From there, Hicks has yet to look back. After a number of successful seasons at Del Campo High School in his native California, Hicks soon realized he could potentially excel on the eld. Following two standout campaigns at Sacramento City Community College a NCAA Division II program Hicks was heavily recruited by several toptier schools across the United States. Hicks agreed to take his talents to Louisiana State University. However, minor recruiting infractions resulted in a full-blown NCAA investigation of LSUs recruitment practices, and Hicks never got to play a game with the Tigers. Ultimately, Hicks would travel to the Great White North to play at the University of Regina, where he has established himself as one of Canadas most dominant defensive lineman over the course of the past two seasons. In Hicks first year with the Rams, he forced a pair of fumbles and recorded 1.5 quarterback sacks. During the 2011 campaign, Hicks led Canada West with 6.5 sacks and was named the divisions nominee for the J.P. Metras Trophy, which is given annually to Canadas top lineman. The next step in Hicks football journey is the East-West Shrine Game in St. Petersburg, Flo., Jan. 21, where the standout defensive lineman is set to showcase his talents on the gridiron. Held annually since 1925, the East-West Shrine Game is regarded by many as one of the United States most anticipated all-star games.

balfour.rbe.sk.ca

The womens basketball team returns to action Friday night against the Brandon Bobcats Theres always pressure when youre ranked No.1, Clark said. We have a big target on our backs, but I think we do a good job of not letting the rankings affect how we play. There isnt much criticism to give a team that is currently undefeated and atop the standings, but Clark believes there is still room for improvement. I am very happy with how weve done in the rst half of the season. I think we had some games where we executed really well. But we still have a lot of work to do and a lot of improvements to make for the next half of the season, she said. I dont think any of us are satised. The Cougars have been out of game action since Nov. 26, but will return to the court this weekend to take on the Brandon Bobcats. However, hometown fans will have an extended break, as the team does not play at home until Jan. 20. Although the break could swing the momentum the Cougars had on their side, Clark believes the extended break is not necessarily a bad thing. I think the break is good, said the former McDonalds allAmerican nalist. Its hard to go from playing every weekend to taking a month off but, if anything, I think we will come back in January excited to play. We have disciplined players with strong work ethics, so Im condent that were all working hard during this time off. If the womens basketball team is going to become national champions at the end of this season, its players are going to have to get past some tough competition. Lucky for Clark, since this is her rst season playing CIS ball, the competition is new to her. I honestly dont know much about the teams up here, she said. We have played good teams in preseason and throughout league. No matter who the Cougars will face during the second half of their season, the teams players have just one goal in mind, and no team will stand in their way. I think our biggest goal is the same as any other team: to win nationals, Clark said. But, in order to do that, well need to reach our smaller goals like lowering the amount of turnovers per game and improving our transition defence. The Cougars quest for the cup continues on Friday night in Brandon, and although they may still have a few things to work on, the countdown to nationals has begun.

autumn mcdowell
sports editor To say the first half of the University of Regina womens basketball teams season was a success would be an understatement. The Cougars currently sit rst in the Canada West standings as well as rst in the nation with a stunning 7-0 record. However, the undefeated record comes as no surprise to fans, as the team is merely fullling the expectations of what many are foreseeing to be a championship season. The Cougars are pleased to have numerous returning players on their roster including post Brittany Read, who is returning to action after a knee injury kept her sidelined for all of 2010-11, and guard Joanna Zalesiak, the Polish sensation who dazzles the crowd with her ball control and wide-range shooting ability. Although several players have returned to the U of R court this season, its a new roster addition that has all of the fans buzzing. Point guard Michelle Clark transferred to the U of R from Purdue University in order to pursue a masters degree in business administration, a move that the Cougars have welcomed with open arms. If the Cougars are to remain at the top of the food chain this season, Clark will have to be a strong contributor every time she steps onto the court. Although the prospect of being ranked No. 1 in the country could cause some players to go for cover, Clark believes that the Cougars are up for the challenge.

Its hard to go from playing every weekend to

taking a month off but, if anything, I think we will come back in January excited to play.
Michelle Clark

the carillon | Jan. 5 - 11, 2012

sports 17

Pat on the back, slap on the ass

You wanted a pump-up column, Ill give you a pump-up column

When the Carillon is away, athletes still play

Hirings and firings were just a few of the December sports headlines

Jarrett Crowe

Chris Bodnar can boot the ball yards. The UBC Thunderbirds football team forfeited their 6-2 season after it was discovered they were using an ineligible player. The ineligible player in question was defensive lineman Conner Flynn, as he had already completed his CIS eligibility at the beginning of the season. As a result, the Rams picked up another two wins, good enough for a third-place nish in Canada West. Due to this infraction, UBC has been suspended until 2013 and will be ned $1,250. Firing squad Terry Murry, Bruce Boudreau, Paul Maurice, Randy Carlyle, and Jaques Martin all fell victim to the NHL coaches axe in the span of a few weeks. As coaches of struggling teams in the NHL, it was only a matter of time before their bench-leading days were over. Players were shocked as news broke of their coaches rings, but fans were not so surprised. Many fans were shocked that Boudreau managed to escape the Capitals nine-game losing streak in 201011, but this year his luck like many others ran out. Former Cougar passes away The Cougars family received some devastating news on Dec. 28 when they learned that Tyson Sievert, a former member of the Cougar mens hockey team, was tragically killed in a single-vehicle accident just outside of Fort QuAppelle. Sievert was a member of the Cougars from 2007-08, and also spent time with the Moose Jaw Warriors, Saskatoon Blades, and Regina Pats of the WHL before joining the AJHLs Bonnyville Pontiacs. Although Sieverts time spent with the Cougars program was limited, the Earl Gray product will always be remembered for his positive attitude and smile around the rink. UBC gets ned

autumn mcdowell
sports editor While some athletes will look at December as a month to remember, others would prefer to never speak of it again. Chris Bodnar signs on the dotted line

facebook.com

Andrew Hayes is set to join the Cougars after being released by the ECHLs Alaska Aces seem to be adjusting to the CIS way of things quite nicely. Lucas Gore seems to have found a permanent home for himself as the starting goalie for the Cougars, but newcomer Andrew Hayes may have other ideas. Hayes, who recently returned from a pro stint with the ECHLs Alaska Aces, has enrolled in classes for the winter semester at the U of R, thus making him ofcially eligible to suit up with the Cougars in January. Friendly competition between these two talented goaltenders will not only improve their skills but benefit the team as well. Leading the way for young forwards, Tyler Henry will look to continue his scoring touch in the New Year; he currently leads all rookie Cougars in scoring with three goals and eight assists in 16 games. Rookie defencemen John Sonntag and Mark Schneider are getting lots of minutes for the Cougars, which is clearly helping them progress; fans can literally see their game improve every time they step onto the ice. If the rookies werent enough to convince fans that the mens hockey team is worth the $12 that non-students have to shell out to see them play, then how about the sophomores. In the past few years the Cougars have been without a goto goal scorer, but Matt Strueby seems to have taken ownership of that title this year. Midway through the season, Strueby has more than tripled his goal total and surpassed his point total from last season. He may have been known around The Dub as the garbage man, but the goals he has been putting in the net this year have been pure beauties. Another player that deserves more credit that he gets s Captain Russ Nielsen. In his fourth season with the team, Nielsen has already put more points on the board than any of his previous seasons. His double-overtime winner against the Lethbridge Pronghorns on Nov. 19 could not have gone to a more deserving player, and could easily be his highlight of the year. Veteran forwards Ryan Sawka and Terrance Delaronde have both been battling injuries over the past few months, and the Christmas break could not have come at a better time for them. If a healthy 2012 is in the cards for both of these players, there is no telling what the team can accomplish. Despite missing the last six games, Delaronde remains the teams third-highest point getter with 11 points in 10 games. If Delaronde can come back strong from his injury and develop chemistry with Strueby, it could be a lethal combination for any goalie to deal with. Fans should take every opportunity they can to see the Cougars in action, as they are sure to have a breakout year in 2012. The rst chance to take in the action is this weekend, when the Manitoba Bisons are in town. The puck drops at 7 p.m. on Friday and Saturday at the Co-operators Centre.

what the puck?

autumn mcdowell
sports editor With a new name on their roster, and players improving with every stride, the University of Regina mens hockey team could very well be the team to watch for in 2012. So far this season, the Cougars have easily gotten the award for most improved, but that just isnt good enough for them. In their collective mind, it seems, being the most improved is just one step up from getting the participation award, and that simply wont do. Although the Cougars currently sit in second-last place in Canada West (4-10-2), second last also means they are in sole possession of a playoff spot something the team missed out on last year but even that isnt good enough. In order to get the recognition they deserve, the Cougars are going to have to work extra hard in the last half of the season and ght hard for every point they can get, but with the personnel they have in their dressing room that shouldnt be a problem. The one knock on the Cougars has always been their youth, but that doesnt seem to be slowing them down anytime soon, In fact, the uncanny amount of rookies

Dec. 21 will be a day to remember for Bodnar, as the Regina product signed a deal with the Saskatchewan Roughriders. Bodnar was a bright spot in what was a troubling season for the Rams this year. His CIS-leading 44.6-yard average on 66 punts made Bodnar an easy choice for the Roughriders. The first-team all-Canadian had previously signed a deal with the Edmonton Eskimos, but was released by the team last June. Crosby down for the count Hockey fans around the world rejoiced on Nov. 21 as Sidney Crosby nally returned to game action since suffering back-toback concussions that had kept him out of competition since Jan. 5. Although The Kid was able to rack up 12 points in eight games, the superstar is once again out of the line-up. On Dec. 7, the Pittsburgh Penguins announced Crosby was to miss the next two games as a precaution, and just ve days later it was announced Crosby was indeed back on the shelf after dealing with concussion symptoms once again; he has yet to return. Packers streak ends at 13 The Green Bay Packers suffered their rst loss at the hands of the Kansas City Chiefs on Dec. 18, thus ending any hopes NFL fans had of witnessing a perfect season. The Packers offensive line had numerous injuries to contend with, which lead to quarterback Aaron Rogers throwing under pressure the entire night. That pressure resulted in Rogers completing just 17-of-35 passes for 235

Fans should take every opportunity they can

to see the Cougars [mens hockey team] in action, as they are sure to have a breakout year in 2012.

18 sports

the carillon | Jan. 5 - 11, 2012

I said whip it, whip it good

Roller derby hits Regina: Fishnets, short shorts, and nicknames required

taishimizu.com

D. Ablos favourite quote: Its better to reign in hell than serve in heaven well but Jodi Holliday, president of Queen City Roller Sports and organizer of Reginas Rockin Roller Derby, discovered the sport through her husband. My husband got me interested in roller derby after he had gone down to Austin, TX, and watched it live, Holliday, who plays under the moniker D. Ablo, said. Once I found out that there was a league in town, he bought me my gear. I went to my first practice and knew that I had found something amazing. In the four years since that first practice, Hollidays curiousity about the sport has become a passion for it. When shes not playing roller derby, shes deeply involved in its organization in Regina. It helps that my husband is also involved, she said. Otherwise we would never see each other. In many ways Holliday can be credited with bringing the roller derby craze to Regina, but it hasnt come without a few setbacks along the way. Starting this new league presented some new challenges, but were happy to say that we are growing by leaps and bounds, Holliday said. We should have at least two league teams this year and will continue to expand as the interest in our league and roller derby in general keeps growing. With plenty of room to grow in the province, Holliday believes that the sport is just starting to gather momentum. I see roller derby as having a huge growth potential in Regina, as well as throughout Saskatchewan and beyond, said Holliday. Leagues are popping up everywhere; we just heard that Humboldt is starting [its] own league. I also think that having the junior league will have an even bigger impact on the growth of roller derby. So far, Holliday admits nding people who are interested in roller derby isnt the problem, its nding proper facilities. The major downfall for almost any derby league is nding adequate and safe practice space, Holliday explained. In the new year, we will be juggling our schedule between three different spaces, none of which are an ideal size. This is especially problematic for us, as our season runs from September to June. There are numerous practice spaces available in the summer, when no one is curling or playing hockey, but the real struggle is during the winter. We are hoping to nd a wealthy benefactor who will build us a rollerdome. In order to get more people involved with roller derby, Holliday and her team have started a junior league, where kids as young as 10 can compete. While in theory the league will make the kids better competitors in the future, the idea of starting 10 year olds in roller derby has had mixed reviews. The response to our junior league has been overwhelming, the girls love it, Holliday said. Some of the parents are a little hesitant at rst, but soon realize the potential that it has for their daughters growth, both physically and emotionally. With an emphasis on empowerment and individuality, this is a sport that many of us senior players wish we would have found at that age. Parents are usually concerned about their child getting hurt. What some dont realize is that it is no more dangerous than hockey, football, or rugby. We place a huge emphasis on safety and rules and teach the girls how to skate and the skills needed to play roller derby. We have a full team of girls and are looking to recruit more. We would love to have enough girls so that they could play against each other and really get some bouting experience. For those that are interested in roller derby, or for those who would like to take in the action rst hand, Reginas Rockin Roller Derby has an upcoming event that is sure to be entertaining for everyone in attendance. On Feb. 4, the Queen City Massacre is to be held at the Agribition Building, Evraz Place. It will be an all-day affair with two junior scrimmages in the afternoon and two senior scrimmages in the evening, Holliday said. The Massacre is an invitational scrimmage with people from leagues in Ontario, Manitoba, Alberta, and Saskatchewan, so far. We are also hoping to hear from some of our American neighbours to the south. We are hoping to host over 140 skaters, 50 refs, and ofcials and countless volunteers and spectators. Holliday encourages anyone and everyone to attend the event and see firsthand what roller derby is all about. For those interested in participating in roller derby, even if you are skeptical, there are other ways to get a taste of the action. You dont need to have any experience; we will teach you the basics of skating and the game of roller derby, but you will need to purchase gear, Holliday said. There is a heavy emphasis on safety and rules, as this is a fastpaced game that requires the players to know how the game works, as with any sport. If you are a little hesitant about playing, you can always come and check out a practice. Roller derby isnt for everyone, but you will know soon enough if it is a sport for you. We are also always looking for skating referees as well as non-skating officials. We also welcome anyone who wants to help out as a volunteer, sponsor, or in any other capacity.

autumn mcdowell
sports editor It may be the only sport where wearing fishnets and miniskirts is not only allowed, its encouraged. Roller derby has skyrocketed in popularity in the past few years and, thanks to the help of movies like Whip It, in visibility as

Become a Parliamentary Guide

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I see roller derby as having a huge growth

potential in Regina, as well as throughout Saskatchewan and beyond.
Jodi Holliday, aka D. Ablo

www.parl.gc.ca/guides

the carillon | Jan. 5 - 11, 2012

advertisement 19

IF YOU GAMBLE REGULARLY WHETHER IT'S POKER VLTS OR AT THE CASINO ASK YOURSELF

For more information about gambling visit www.healthysask.ca

hey,
the carillon is looking for a new distribution manager. if you want to make some money putting some papers in some places, get at editor@carillonregina.com

graphics

Visual Editor: Julia Dima graphics@carillonregina.com the carillon | Jan. 5 - 11, 2012

Paul Bogdan & Troy Jul

Julia Dima

Edward Dodd

Jacob Samuel Peak (Simon Fraser University)

op-ed
editorial
I am rather happy that the holidays are coming to an end. Not that I didnt enjoy seeing my family, or spending time laying in bed all day watching Star Trek and Sucker Punch, but the holidays are stressful for a number of reasons. While its nice to decompress, the method by which most people expect you to decompress is in itself stressful. As nice as visiting with my family is, spending four hours in a car with them isnt always the nicest way to spend Christmas Day. When you spend most of your days driving back and forth from the university and running between classes, the last thing that you want to do is more moving. Add to that your mother asking every few minutes who youre texting and if you have a girlfriend, and the nice holiday from work rapidly becomes more stressful than the work itself. On top of that, even once you part ways with your family, there are numerous holiday events that you are expected to attend. As fun as they are, packing several parties into a month-long holiday season is trying at times. Travelling all over for various parties is time-consuming and tiring, and soon the few days you had hoped to spend reading are gone, replaced with very late nights and sleeping in until two in the afternoon. Worst of all, between some awkward family times and the parties, there is shopping to be done. Its almost an expected part of the Christmas season, from Black Friday where, as a YouTube video revealed last month, a writhing mass of people will fight over $2 waffle irons to Boxing Week, when stores slash their prices in an effort to move all their inventory that

Op-Ed Editor: Edward Dodd op-ed@carillonregina.com the carillon | Jan. 5 - 11, 2012

A welcome relief from the holidays

actasifblog.com

wasnt good enough to sell at full price, consuming is a serious aspect of the holidays. In pursuit of gifts for others and, later, gifts to ourselves, nearly everyone ventures out to the mall, where any semblance of human kindness is ground down in the rampage to nd the best deals. Venturing into a mall any time during Boxing Week is a dangerous gambit if you dont like being run over by people so engrossed in shopping that they cannot see where they are going. On top of actually being inside the mall, trying to navigate the chaos that is a downtown street or sidewalk on your way to the mall during this time is an exercise in frus-

tration, as there is so much trafc that getting anywhere takes much longer than it should. In a city like Regina, where you basically have to take your car everywhere, the problem is much worse. Not surprisingly, the stress of driving around all day, when combined with the inclement weather that occurred this year, cause people to be exceptionally irritable. I am thinking especially of the man on Ring Road who stuck his entire arm out the window to flip everyone off as he careened onto the off-ramp for Dewdney Ave. It was wonderful to know that two days after Christmas, supposedly a day of great kindness and compassion, someone could be so angry that putting their entire arm out

the window to say, Fuck you to his fellow motorists was the acceptable thing to do. So I am glad the holidays are over. Ill be able to go to the mall without being trampled, drive without the added stress of increased traffic, and fall into a comfortable routine in which parties are a recreational activity rather than a duty, and visit my family without the expectation that we should be going out and doing something together. Im ready to decompress by starting classes.

edward dodd
op-ed editor

presidents message
Welcome back to the University of Regina! I hope everyone had a happy, safe, and relaxing holiday season.The new year has just begun and the U of R students union already has a number of engaging events and initiatives planned. For example, we will be launching a bottled-water free campaign. We want the University of Regina to ban bottled water its expensive, wasteful, harmful to the environment, and not as safe as the high-quality, public water that comes from our taps. As part of this sustainability campaign, we will be distributing re-usable water bottles, informational literature, buttons, and we have already started working with the university to explore the possibility of installing water bottle refilling stations around campus. It is an exciting campaign, and one that I hope you will support. A major event happening in the winter semester is the National Day of Action. On Feb. 1, students from coast to coast will be going All Out to demand action on several important public issues. Here at the University of Regina, we will be focusing on the unfair spending cap placed on the Post-Secondary Student Support Program (PSSSP), as well as demanding that the provincial government drop tuition fees. A short outdoor rally and a longer indoor portion will be happening on Feb. 1 at the First Nations University of Canada watch for a number of events we have planned leading up to that date! Some other events happening in the winter semester include our Annual General Meeting, Mental Health Awareness Week, a small sexual health fair,

a referendum to establish a tiny $1 fee for UR Pride, and students union elections, among others. This last year, for the rst time in nearly twenty years, the University of Regina Students Union has a new logo and a refreshed brand. The new logos selection process was a collaborative one between the executive, the board, staff, and students themselves. We accomplished something that students dont do very often we completely changed the face of our students union. The students union also passed one of the most successful budgets in its history. We had record revenue from increased enrolment and excellent performance from the Owl. To ensure a balanced budget we also had record yet sustainable spending, with massive amounts of money invested back into students through increased funding to the student societies and student sponsorship. It was a historic budget in another sense we made the long overdue decision to eliminate the perks, privileges, and giveaways that previous students union executives indulged in. For instance, during the election we promised to save students thousands of dollars by getting rid of the executives cheap food and booze they enjoyed in the Owl, as well as their free classes it was a promise made, and so it was a promise kept. We also lowered the fee students have to pay for a locker and created the very first fund that is available exclusively to residence students who want to hold an event to engage members on campus. Our relationship with the Canadian

Federation of Students (CFS) is the healthiest it has been in some time. We have a prairies organizer as well as a functioning bank account and accountability. The URSUs very own Haanim Nur was elected as the CFS-Sask Chairperson and I was elected to the national executive of the federation. We have sent strong and diverse delegations to the Federations National General Meetings, and have even given presentations as part of workshops so that students from across Canada can learn from Saskatchewans successes and experiences. We have done the groundwork necessary to ensure members are benetting from the various services offered by the Federation. We also went to Ottawa for the federations annual Lobby Week, during which we meet with MPs and senators from all parties to discuss post-secondary education issues. 2011 has been, without a doubt, a year of re-building bridges with our sisters and brothers from across the country as part of the student movement. Last semester, students did yet another thing that was a historic first together, we pressured the University of Regina president to actually hold a public forum on parking to consult with students about parking services, administration, fees, and policy changes. Our parking campaign was, by almost every measure, an outstanding achievement. President Vianne Timmons was gracious enough to interact directly with students during the forum, and I continue to keep in close contact with the universitys administration about advancements as they relate to parking issues.

Perhaps the most substantial accomplishment weve been able to achieve thus far was the Our Future is Now campaign that ran during last years provincial election. Leaders in the student movement have never been afraid to challenge the status quo and advocate for better policies that will benet members and we did just that. Working with professors, the CFS, First Nations leaders, politicians, and, of course, with the student body, we developed a strong campaign with sensible, well-researched, and achievable policy recommendations. Many political parties actually adopted many of our recommendations into their official platforms, and we managed to pressure the governing party into focusing more on post-secondary education than it otherwise would have. The campaign, in short, was a smashing success, most evident in how it engaged members. Close to Election Day, the Canadian Centre for Policy Alternatives (CCPA) even released a study on post-secondary education, housing, and childcare that vindicated everything we were saying during the campaign. There are many others to list, but for brevitys sake I have to end it there. I look forward to another semester of working for students and even more accomplishments that we can achieve together.

kent peterson
ursu president

22 op-ed

the carillon | Jan. 5 - 11, 2012

Reviewing a year in review

I am so sick of reading last years news. Yes, I am aware that if you read the rest of the Carillon this week, youve basically been bombarded with 2011 in review. Unfortunately, if we dont talk about the New Year, it looks like we are totally unaware that anything occurred. If we dont go through with some sort of recap issue, we seem to be totally out of line with what people expect. However, that does not mean I like this issue. Even before Christmas, the media was blaring on about the year in review. I had the misfortune of watching SportsCentre (and then the subsequent ve or six reruns of the same SportsCentre since apparently my sports-obsessed brother needs to watch the same shitty stories repeatedly) and aside from its clichd and overdramatic coverage of the Russian Junior Hockey team, it was presenting its standard rundown of the top 40 plays from the last year. Its such a valuable experience that Ive added to my life, repeatedly watching one play after another with no real context and nothing but an announcer yelling excitedly. Aside from SportsCentre, there was an array of year in reviews from all the other channels. One of my favourite was CTV News Channels coverage of the year in review, which amounted to quickly recapping the days news event in ve minutes so that they could get to what was really important: Jacqueline Milczarek awkwardly trying to contribute to a discussion with two comedians about why men are stupid. Following another five-minute interrupNot to mention that when news channels do get down to reviewing the year in news, they all gravitate towards the same stories. This makes a lot of sense, considering that it should be obvious which news stories were important, but it still makes watching the news irritating in the extreme since they are all doing the exact same thing and covering the same stories again. We would be much better served if the news channels took turns alternating which of them did the recap for the year while the others did something different. The only thing that kind of looked interesting was CBCs recap of 2011 through Peter Mansbridges interviews from the last year. While it was still a review piece, at least it was something other than quickly running down what happened last year. Its an interesting, creative twist on the idea of yearly reviews and something sorely lacking in any coverage around this time. As far as I am concerned, a year-in-review segment is nothing more than a passing interest and a reminder of all the things that can happen in a year. Such a reminder should be solely for a little entertainment, and should not take up nearly as much time nor carry as much weight as the media likes to give it, but these year-end practices are by now deeply entrenched in newsroom culture. At the end of next year, I will just have to resort to the one thing I know will work: turning off the TV and waiting for the middle of January.

sessions.edu

Like the ball that drops in New York, if you look at year in review coverage too long, it becomes tacky tion of current events something about shootings in Nigeria we were subjected to Richard Crouse talking about the movie year in review, which would be ne, if there was anything aside from that. It felt like a solid hour of Richard Crouse, news, Richard Crouse, news, Richard Crouse, and so on. The only entertainment I could wring out of his segment was yelling at the TV with my brother, demanding to know the real news, i.e. how had Crouse broken his arm.

edward dodd
op-ed editor

Efcient altruism
WINNIPEG (CUP) The other day, I passed a pink re truck. It was, of course, related to some kind of breast cancer fundraiser. As I looked on, a question occurred to me in a sudden moment of clarity: what exactly is the connection between oncology and the decor of emergency vehicles? Surely, if our goal is to eradicate breast cancer, there are much better ways to go about it. Research, for instance, has served us well in the past. Painting the truck is just another example of those weird but ubiquitous charitable fundraisers that include some kind of ostentatious display. It seems no fund drive is complete without a marathon, a glow-bowling tournament, a hotdog-eating contest, or some other incredibly wasteful activity with no real connection to the cause being supported. We tell ourselves the purpose of charity is to help others. If that were the case, wed regularly donate an affordable, yet sizeable, sum to the most effective charity possible. But thats not what we do. We grudgingly surrender a few bucks a couple times throughout the year, and only if the charity in question goes to the trouble of organizing a sponsored potato sack race for our viewing pleasure. This is compassion as luxury. It is the behaviour pattern of someone who wants to appear altruistic and get the attendant warm feeling, not someone who genuinely cares. The result of this is that money goes to the charities most effective at organizing Bavarian re drills. Pictures, testimonials, and guilt trips decide who gets funding, not simple facts about which charity is doing the best job. According to a post on GiveWell.org, the vast majority of charities have never been evaluated for effectiveness, and of the ones that have, most have demonstrated a weak or even negative effect. You could get a warm feeling by simply setting money on re, and it would have approximately the same effect as donating to a startling number of charities. It seems ghastly to think about charity in the cold, economic terms of return on in-

vestment, but thats how the game is played. If you want to help people, you need to constantly hold two questions in your mind: Is this effective? and Could someone else do it better? If there are two charities, A and B, and A can save a starving child in Sierra Leone for $100, while B can cure three cholera-aficted children in Uganda for the same cost, then there is only one valid, moral answer to the question of who to donate to. Giving to charity A is obviously the worse proposition. GiveWell, a non-profit organization that does extensive research to evaluate charities based on their effectiveness, has a wide variety of information available on its website. It not only does in-depth analysis of specific charities, but also evidencebased assessments of different types of programs, such as anti-retroviral therapy as a preventative treatment for HIV. The site has some surprising facts such as some surrounding education programs and after-school programs that have been shown to have little to no effect. GiveWell recently rolled out a new list of top recommended charities just in time for the holiday season, when most of their donations come in. The new list topper is the Against Malaria Foundation, which distributes insecticide-treated mosquito nets to developing countries. GiveWell estimates that it costs only about $5 per bed net, which helps prevent malaria and deaths as a result of the illness. Around this time of year, people start thinking about generosity. You have a duty to make sure your generosity accomplishes something especially if the research could be as simple as spending 10 minutes on a website. Go to GiveWell or another site like it and take their data into account. It could be, quite literally, a matter of life and death.

Get over it and go to bed

CALGARY (CUP) Millenials the Facebook generation, the deeply indebted generation, the spoiled-rotten generation love to assume the worst. Students who cant remain focused on a task for 10 minutes immediately jump to the conclusion that they suffer from attention decit disorder. Those who prefer keeping their room tidy instead of roaming around in a boars nest of clothing and dishes say its due to an undiagnosed case of obsessive-compulsive disorder. The latest student prescription regards the inability to fall asleep. No, no, it couldnt be an easy-to-remedy issue it must be the most extreme case of sleep deprivation: insomnia. No matter how many herds of sheep these poor zombies count, they just cant manage to fall victim to the Sandman. But is this really an unsolvable conundrum that most students cant x on their own? According to the U.S. National Library of Medicine website, the following can lead to major sleeping issues: a lack of exercise, too much caffeine, heavy smoking, and using the television or computer before going to bed. In other words, pounding back six venti cinnamon dolce lattes during your regular school schedule and then ring off 15 text messages just before you attempt to doze off might not be the most soporic course to take. Same goes for smoking enough tar to repair an entire highway or beginning a Lost marathon at 11 p.m. on a school night. And when was the last time you broke a sweat that wasnt stress-related? Giving the body a brisk workout can help the great sleep predicament. Although I am no sleep expert, I personally sleep every night like a three-yearold boy after a big day at the beach. So my advice would be to turn off all technological devices. Submit your attention to a good old-fashioned book. Allow your imagination to put in some last-minute work. Without channel-ipping, dialling, texting, or sexting, your body can prepare for a few hours of doing absolutely nothing. If you cant refrain from your coffee or cigarette fix, at least try to schedule the gorging a few hours before bed time. Hopefully this helps you nally get up on the right side of the bed and allows you to be thankful for being relatively disorder-free.

seamus smyth
weal (sait polytechnic)

tom ingram
manitoban (university of manitoban)

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the carillon | Jan. 5 - 11, 2012

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the carillon reader survey

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Well be contacting winners of the draw via email. It wont be shared with third parties, you wont be added to any kind of listserv, none of that stuff. Were just going to draw your email address and let you know youve won. And weve got this question under a separate line so we can detach it from the rest of the survey, so your email is going to remain totally separate from your responses. We want your honest feedback, and we want you to have a fair chance to get something in return. Sound good? Okay, cool.

24 the back page

the carillon | Jan. 5 - 11, 2012

Dearest Math 111 classmate, I appreciate the attention, but maybe you should pay more of it to the class, then you might actually pass. Best of luck, guy in Math 111 with a Mario Mustache

name email address message

student no.

In regards to the comments made about Joanna Zaleisak in the roundtable, its sad that you have to use the school newspaper to release your anger on someone who has done nothing but build up this Womens Basketball program. Next time you decide to talk bad about an athlete, I suggest you choose someone who doesnt have numerous awards and isnt a member of a team thats ranked #1 in the country. Im sorry about your refereeing experience, as Im sure that charge in your rec game was your

LIttle heads up to a certain roundtable sports writer... Jo came here to get an education, she was last years u of r female athlete of the year, canada-west rst team allstar, second-team all Canadian, and was second in the conference in both scoring and assists. So I'd say she's very good...Just sayin though. Dear a Certain Roundtable Sports Writer, who are you to say anything about her attitude when you don't even know who she is outside of reffing your rec games? One shitty call doesn't give you the right to put her on blast. PS she's going back to poland next year to play pro...because she's an amazing basketball player.

moment to shine.

To the guy with the dark grey jacket and the white-with-somestripes-backpack walking at approx: 8:15am all the way from Riddell to Education on Nov 30: Dayum. Nice Ass. MLP fans unite! Take down nonbelievers now. Use the Sonic Rainboom! Super effective! Pokemon and MLP FTW. You jelly?

Do you look homeless, ravished, and border line psychotic? Then your probably just a professor.

3am McDonalds sucks! Never go at said time Get into the #2012Resolution declassified

twitter: @the_carillon #declass facebook: carillon newspaper real life: rc 227 (above the owl)
if youre depressed about coming back to classes just remember there are always sesame street youtubes

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