Therapists Overview

IDENTIFYING PROVEN PROBLEM-SOLVING SKILLS

GOALS OF THE EXERCISE

1. 2. 3. Understand the relationship between addiction and partner relational conflicts. Develop the skills necessary to maintain open, effective communication, sexual intimacy, and enjoyable time with a partner. Clarify and more effectively use innate strengths and resources in the community and environment to achieve and maintain recovery from addiction. Reframe both addiction and conflict as problems to be solved, having much in common with other problems already solved in the past.

4.

ADDITIONAL PROBLEMS FOR WHICH THIS EXERCISE MAY BE USEFUL

Family Conflicts Parent-Child Relational Problem Suicidal Ideation

SUGGESTIONS FOR PROCESSING THIS EXERCISE WITH CLIENT

The Identifying Proven Problem-Solving Skills activity is intended for clients who suffer from learned helplessness or low self-esteem and as a result fail to use available resources and abilities to achieve and maintain recovery and productive relationships. It guides the client in a systematic self-assessment to identify problem-solving skills he/she has successfully used in other situations and plan strategies for using these skills to address current issues. Follow-up can include keeping a journal and reporting back on successes and lessons learned.

EXERCISE XXVIII.B

IDENTIFYING PROVEN PROBLEM-SOLVING SKILLS

This assignment will strengthen your recovery quickly. Everyone has problemsolving skills, and we each have a combination of talents. This exercise will help you look at your successes in all areas to find resources you already have. 1. Often in addiction treatment we hear unfamiliar terms. People use words like dependence, abstinence, surrender, Higher Power, and others in unfamiliar ways; it can seem like learning a new language. Please list words that are new or being used in ways that are new to you.

2.

We may also get the impression that well have to learn a whole new set of skills to solve the problems that brought us into treatment. When staff and fellow clients talk about what has to be done to stay clean and sober, these terms are often equally unfamiliar. Please list any tasks or actions youve heard people talking about that seem foreign and unfamiliar.

3.

None of us grow up without learning ways to solve problems. Using addictive behaviors was one of our problem-solving tools, and that one obviously wont work here, but youve used other methods. Please list three situations where you have solved problems or achieved goals.

4.

Now please examine this list of problem-solving/goal-accomplishing skills and traits, and check off the ones you used in the three situations you just listed. Asking for help

Attention to details Being alert

EXERCISE XXVIII.B

Being decisive Being persistent Brainstorminggenerating lots of ideas then picking out the best ones Breaking a big problem down into small steps Courtesy Explaining and teaching things to others Finding alternative ways to do things Flexibility Following instructions Humor Learning by watching others Listening carefully Mastering new information Negotiating Open-mindedness Organizing/working with other people Patience Planning use of time Practicing a difficult task until it gets easy Practicing an easy task, then working up to hard ones Recognizing patterns Researching needed info (e.g., asking people, using books, the Internet, etc.) Taking notes Trial and error Working alone 5. The items from this list that most people find most useful are all of the above! However, each of us uses them differently. Please go over the list in question 4, and pick three items you use most often in solving problems, then write about how you can use them during your recovery. For example, if you picked researching needed information, you could read books on the problem, talk to people who succeed at the task, find web sites with useful information, etc. Problem-Solving Skill or Trait How I Can Use It in Recovery

EXERCISE XXVIII.B

6.

Many alcoholics and addicts, once theyre no longer impaired, are smart, creative, funny, hard-working, loyal, generous people. How many of those words fit you? What qualities do others value in you? Please ask three people who know you well what qualities and abilities of yours they think will be most helpful in staying clean and sober. Write their answers here.

How can you apply those same qualities and abilities to other problems?

Here are some ways in which some particular skills and strengths can help people in recovery. If you have these skills or strengths, here are ways you can use them: a. Communication skills. Work with othersstaff, others in recovery, clergy, friends, familyto improve relationships. b. High energy and determination. Keep working your program even if youre temporarily discouraged; help others. c. Sense of humor. Cope with difficult or painful times, avoid self-pity or false pride, enjoy fellowship with other recovering people. d. Spirituality. Improve a relationship with a Higher Power; stay clear on what your values are; have faith to carry you through hard times. e. Creativity. Find new ways to help oneself and others and new uses for old tools. 7. Think about the hardest or most nerve-wracking parts of getting and staying clean and sober. Pick a situation that has you worried, and briefly describe how youll use these methods and qualities to tackle the issue. After you finish this handout, talk it over with your therapist. Problem: How I Can Tackle It:

Above all, remember, whatever questions or problems you face in recovery, someone else has faced them before you. If they succeeded, so can you; pick out some people a lot like you who overcame similar problems, find out what they did, and try doing the same things. Be sure to bring this handout back to your next therapy session, and be

prepared to talk about your thoughts and feelings about the exercise.