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LaPera / LOSING DAD

Introduction Like a master computer, the brain controls everything, but when it malfunctions theres no
system reset, no disk recovery, no memory restore. That speaks volumes to the frailty of man.

Joseph graduated from college in Illinois, bought a house in California, and raised a family in the suburbs. By all accounts his life seemed normal. And it was, until he got the news. Cancer. At the hospital, Hilda held her husbands hand before his procedure was to begin. The operation was successful and his prognosis good, until a routine follow-up procedure went awry. Doctors rushed Joseph into emergency surgery and, for the second time in a week, put him under general anesthesia. Like a light switched off, everything changed. The medical mistake precipitated his quick descent into psychosis, extreme paranoia, and grandiose delusions. Joseph did the unthinkable. He embarked on a trip that involved four continents, thirty countries, and thirteen wives. He gave up everything along the way, his career, his finances, and his family. While homeless in America, he had run-ins with drug dealers and prostitutes. He was purportedly arrested in Israel, preached to the Mafioso in Italy, and was hailed as a prophet in Africa. This is a true story that follows one mans bizarre journey through mental illness. This man is not a faceless stranger living on the streets. He is my father.
Many names throughout this book have been changed to protect the privacy of the individuals involved.

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Chapter One (May 2000) The Call My little three-and-a-half-year-old son threw a tantrum in the store over a box of Cookie Crisp.
At least at the end of the difficult shopping trip, Justin helped his single mommy bring in the groceries. I put the milk cartons in the refrigerator and hoisted the rest of the plastic bags onto the kitchen counter. When I reached over to pull out the lettuce and bananas, I noticed the flashing red light on the answering machine and hit play. Sunday May 28, 2000. You have one new message. The machine clicked. Amanda. It took me a moment to recognize the voice. This is Dad. Sorry I missed you, but I will try to call back at about 6 oclock your time. Thats 6 oclock Pacific Time. I pray to our Lord Jesus Christ that you will be there to answer the phone. Give praise to God and Jesus, our Lord and Savior. There, its done. God will have you there to answer the phone. In His name I pray. Beep. Stunned, I hit replay. I hadnt seen Dad in over a year. Eight months had passed since he abandoned my stepmother Hilda in West Virginia. Almost five months had passed since he mysteriously showed up at my sisters house. Like my sister and brother, I had tried to push all thoughts of Dad from my head. While Dads message repeated, I thought about the Bible he sent me on November 22, 1999, and that random letter he sent from the Hotel Tivoli Lisboa in Portugal. He had mailed neatly folded pieces of soft facial tissue. That was back in March, over two months ago. I ran to

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my bedroom to find the letter. It was in the file cabinet, under the file labeled Dad. The letter was handwritten in black ink, in tiny print, on a small sheet of hotel stationary:

Sunday, March 26, 2000 Dear Amanda, I hope you and Justin are in good health and the grace of God is keeping your hearts and minds in peace through our Lord and risen Savior, Christ Jesus, the only begotten Son of God. Since the last time I wrote, Ive been many places. In 10 or more countries, preaching and teaching the Kingdom of God and witnessing for Jesus. I now tell them 4 things are needed: 1. Believe with all your mind, strength, heart & soul & confess (to yourself) with your lips I believe Jesus Christ is the Son of God 2. Complete submersion (any Pentecostal church) in water in the name of the Father & of the Son and of the Holy Ghost (Sprinkling not enough) 3. #1 & more than anyone else: I love you, God and Jesus! 4. Love everyone else as Christ has (& does) love us. After Bulgaria (My last wife) I left Bulgaria. Now, #1 No smoking, #2 No alcohol (due to my stomach, although one beer in Germany was OK in moderation) #3 No affection with a woman (or husband) who isnt your wife (husband) In fact, Paul says in 1 COR 7:1 It is good for a man not to touch a woman. From Bulgaria, I went to Turkey (Istanbul Izmir Bodrum Antalya Istanbul). How beautiful is Turkey by the Hand of God through Jesus. I did free Greek dancing for customers in both Istanbul (upscale dinner/night club) & in Sofia, Bulgaria (Sheraton & a Greek taverna =caf). Turkey Sofia Bucharest, Romania (all this for Jesus/God, of course, not my glory!) (God forbid I should do otherwise!)Thessaloniki, Greece Skopje, Macedonia Thessaloniki Athens Frankfurt, Germany Stuttgart, Germany Italy (MilanVeniceBolognaRomeNaples). On a train from Bologna to Rome, after conversing with an Algerian Muslim who spoke English & wished to improve his German, He asked for (& I gave with great joy) a New Testament written in English, German, and French! (Thank you, Jesus! Praise the Lord! Glory to God in the highest! Bless his Holy Name, Forever & Ever! Amen! To Sicily (From Palermo to Catania Mafia Capital, I ministered to the taxi driver, a low-level

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Mafioso (Or Mafioso Family son)! Then, the Malta (oldest architecture in world St. Paul stopped there & started a church) Spain (Barcelona Madrid) Im now is Lisboa, Portugal! Amanda, the <3 softest and <3 most durable Kleenex Ive had are these 2 pieces from a kiosk in Istanbul, Turkey!!! One is for <3 you <3 & one for <3 Justin <3 !!! Tell him to say thank you, God and thank you, Jesus as he always should when receiving any blessing (anything good is from God). As in meal time the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with your Spirit, Yours in Christ, Love, Peace, Joyful Anticipation for Jesus! Dad (Grandpa)

I looked up at the clock: it was 4:37 P.M. Justin grabbed at my shirt and started whining. Mommy, I wanna watch TV. Normally, I wouldve encouraged a book or a toy. Not now. I flipped on the television, popped a cartoon movie into the VCR, and sat Justin down on the couch. I glanced up; it was 4:43 p.m. He asked for a drink. I concocted an odd mix of chocolate and strawberry milk, grabbed a bowl of plain Cheerios and handed them to him. Then, I replayed the message a third time, as I picked up my cell phone and speed-dialed Hildas number. Hallo, she greeted, her Argentinean accent still apparent. Oh, Hilda. Oh my God. Im so glad youre home! Uh-oh, whats the matter? Dad called. Silence on the other end. I continued, And hes going to call back in about an hour. What should I do? Aye yie yie. She paused, collected her composure, and replied, Amanda, listen to me. He needs help. He is not well. You have to get him help. He needs to be at a hospital. Yes, but I dont know where he is.

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Well, dear, see if you can find out. Call me back. Oh! Amandy, if you only knew. Hilda sounded excited at the prospect of finding her husband, but scared at the thought of losing him again. Okay, Ill try to find out where he is, but hey, at least hes alive. Yes, thats right, at least hes alive. Justin started competing for my attention by pulling at my pants leg and incessantly whimpering. Okay, Ive got to go, but I promise Ill call you back later tonight. It doesnt matter how late. You know Ill be up, she assured me. There was absolutely no way she could sleep now. I knew that shed be up all night worrying if I didnt phone her. Dont forget, dear. I wont. I promise. After ending the call, and in between entertaining Justin, I phoned my sister and my brother. Before I knew it, the clock read: 5:57 P.M. Even though it was a cordless phone, I sat next to it and waited. As soon as the minute hand jerked forward onto precisely 6:00 P.M., the phone rang. I checked the caller ID, but the number came up as unavailable. I let it ring again before cradling the receiver up to my cheek. I took a deep breath and exhaled; my heart raced. Hello, I managed to calmly welcome. Amanda? the voice hesitated. Dad? Is it really you? Incredulous, I sat down on the nearest seat. Thats a silly question. Who else would it be? God instructed me to call you, Dad stated matter-of-factly. Not expecting that response, I asked, Where are you? Im on the streets, doing Gods work as he has commanded me to do.

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Okay, but what state are you in? Who said I was still in America? Again, he caught me off-guard. Well, where are you? Thats not important. I didnt push it any further; I sensed his irritation and couldnt risk having him hang up now. Are you okay? I mean weve all been worried about you, me and Hilda and He cut me off, I dont want to hear that devils name. Confused, I clarified, You mean your wifes name? Shes not my wife anymore. Speechless, I tossed his answer around in my head for a moment. How could that be? I couldve sworn they were still married before he had abandoned Hilda in West Virginia last year. Dad continued in a stern voice, Dont worry about it. Its not any of your business. Then his tone softened, Ive had over ten wives already. I nearly choked on the air. What? Hows that possible? Youve only been married three times. Ive been married by God. My fourth wife was a 59 year old Filipina prostitute in Amman, Jordan. I grabbed a paper and pen and started scribbling notes. My fifth ex-wife was in Cairo, Egypt; she was a very dark-skinned, large Bantu African from Sudan and was 30 years old. We spent two nights together. My sixth ex-wife was in Bucharest, Romania. She was a gypsy woman, maybe about 35 years old. She had two children: a 15 year old daughter and a 7 year old son. The seventh was a 22 year-old Bulgarian prostitute. I proposed marriage to her at a night club in Sofia on February 9th, but she wanted 100 US dollars. At least I kissed her lips twice. I chose a wife for only 100 US dollars from a menuin my hotelbut, she was not my

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wife.had a devil in hernot me. My eighth and ninth wives were both from Senegal, West Africa. My last wife, the tenth one, was from the Ivory Coast. I need a woman badly, but absolutely no sex before marriageholding hands, hugging, and face or lip kissing is OK. Ewww! What the hell? I didnt think Dad was capable of sexual relations after his prostate surgery, so this information baffled me. Was he sleeping with these women? Dad, where did you meet them? I just told you where they were each from. Ive been to over thirty countries so far and over fifty cities. Ive spent over $60,000 spreading the word of God. This was not for me, you understand. Its to spread the word of our Lord. Which countries have you been to? Hmm, let me thinkFirst I went to Amman, Jordan, then to Tel Aviv, Israel, then back to Jordan, then Cairo, Egypt. After that I went to Romania, Bulgaria, and then to Turkey. Thats where I did a Greek folk-dance at the Sheraton for free. Then, I went back to Romania, then to Greece, Macedonia, and then to Germany. Thats where I had rindwurst, which is a beef sausage, with sauerkraut, and a dark blend, the best Pilsner beer I ever had. Then I went to Italy and to Spain and Portugal. Oh, I sent you a letter from Portugal, did you receive it? Yes, yes, I did, Dad. My hand cramped. Through the phone, I could sense Dad smile. Wasnt that the softest tissue ever? Yes, it was really soft, Dad. Well, after Portugal, I went to Morocco to Casablanca and then in West Africa, I went to Dakar, Ivory Coast, Sierra Leone, and Gambia. After that, God sent me to Paris, France, then to North Germany, to Austria, Hungary, and to Poland.thats where I was in Warsaw and Gdansk. Then I went to Copenhagen where I went to Tivoli Gardens in Denmark. Next God

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commanded me to Oslo, Norway, Amsterdam, Holland, then back to Oslo, Bergen, Trakiso, Lakso. Then I went from Stockholm, Sweden to Finland and then back to Stockholm, Sweden. He took a long pause. Dad, how on Earth did you afford to go to all of those places? God provides for me, he answered. Then he continued, God and his angels have delivered a message to me for you. How would you like it if you and little Justin flew out here and joined me on the streets in spreading the word of God? Uh, no thank you, Dad. I searched for a decent excuse. Im still trying to finish college. I wouldnt finish my bachelors degree until December. Oh, Amanda. College is not important, he said. I did a double take. That statement ran contrary to everything Dad had ever taught me. I argued, But, it will sure help me get a real job to pay the rent. Forget the treasures of this world for the treasures of the next. Dad seemed to be floating above any earthly reality. I scrunched up my forehead. This was nonsensical. Dad, who informed me that I was going to college before I even knew what college meant, was now discounting the value of an education and a roof over my head. Okay, thats great, Dad, but I have a small child to support. Remember your grandson Justin? Rent is expensive. I couldnt help, but to sound more than a bit annoyed. Youre only worried because youre not yet saved. You cannot be saved until you are baptized under the water and accept Jesus as your Lord and Savior. Dad, are you forgetting that I was baptized already?

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The Catholic Church doesnt count. Their doctrine is incorrect. I am the only one who has the true doctrine of Christ. God has made me a prophet. Stunned, my jaw dropped open as he finished. But I cant blame you for being taught incorrectly. Its partially my fault and I will take the blame. You see, the Catholic Church doesnt do it right. The only real way is a full body immersion under the water. Only then can you be saved. A wild and crazy idea popped into my head. Without thinking, I blurted out, Well, how do I get saved then? I can baptize you. God has granted me that power. I have already saved people. I have even brought an animal back from the dead. What? Hows that? I rolled my eyes. It was back in 1999. Shadow had tried to eat a little animal, but I brought it back to life because God works through me. I can save you and Justin if you are honestly ready and willing to accept God into your hearts. I can baptize you both. But, where would you baptize us? Oh, anywhere. The location is unimportant. The ocean, a lake, anywhere What about my apartment pool? Giddy with excitement, Dad took the bait. Yes. Yes, I can do that. You can have Trevor come too. I dont know about Trevor. I didnt think my brother had recovered yet from being traumatized by Dad. Ill have to ask him. So, when can we be baptized? How about next weekend? I can be there next weekend. Oh, praise the Lord Jesus! In His name, I give thanks and praise.

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10

Do you need my address? He had never visited me at the apartment that Justin and I had been in for the past year. The last time Dad came to visit mehe had taken Justin for the weekendI was still living in my Moms apartment. I shared the information with him before he abruptly had to go, complaining that his calling card would be running out any second. We said our good-byes and hung up. I sat by the phone and stared across the room at Justin leafing through the pages of his favorite book as he sat on the couch. I felt a twinge of guilt for what I was planning to do.

About the Author Because of her familys experience with mental illness, Amanda LaPera is a vocal advocate for those with untreated severe mental illnesses and their families. More information about mental health, as well as her writing, including links to her blog, short stories and poetry, can be found at www.amandalapera.com. You can also find her on Facebook at www.fb.com/amandalapera and at www.fb.com/losingdad.

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