Beruflich Dokumente
Kultur Dokumente
By David Sunshine
Tips 1 - 10
To produce a good marriage, you have to work at it. As the saying goes, the only place you find success before work is in the dictionary. Here are some things you can do to help build a strong marriage.
5. Be Polite
Be courteous to your spouse. When speaking with him or her, use phrases such as please, thank you, would you mind if I...., and so forth. It will make your spouse feel appreciated and respected.
What they dont realize is that the message that comes across is, Arent I smarter than you? which is insulting. When youre proven right after an argument, your spouse will realize this on his or her own. There is no need to point it out. The poet Ogden Nash wrote the following poem to encourage people to act this way: To keep your marriage brimming, With love in the wedding cup, Whenever youre wrong, admit it; Whenever youre right, shut up.
She never lets me leave the window open at night. He always wears that loud shirt that embarrasses me. She never replaces the toilet roll when its finished. He always leaves his socks on the floor.
These small matters can be very detrimental to a relationship, so watch out for them. There is, however, a silver lining to this cloud: Just as little things can ruin a relationship, they can also build one. A brief call to ask how your spouses day is going can make a big difference in his or her feelings toward you. Remembering your mates birthday with a little gift can mean a lot. Even just bringing your partner a chocolate bar or a novel you think he or she will enjoy can mean a great deal, because it shows you care. Women in particular often need small but frequent gestures of love.
12. Be Loving
Be affectionate. Open up and express with words your love for your spouse. People need to feel loved, so be sure your mate hears these words often.
Being so direct in asking for what you want might not seem as romantic as having your partner intuit your desires, but its a lot better than feeling disappointed and getting into fights!
21. Be Forgiving
When youre upset with your spouse, be forgiving. Realize that we all have flaws, and that each of us makes mistakes occasionally. Its part of being human. Think of all the mistakes youve made in the past. Since you can forgive yourself for all of those misdeeds, its only fair that you be able to forgive others for theirs as well. Realize that when you forgive your partner, youre not saying that what he or she did was okay. Youre saying that you choose not to let it get in the way of your relation-ship. A wise man once said, Marriage is three parts love and seven parts forgiveness. Love by itself just wont cut the ice.