A TREATISE ON THE HISTORY AND RITUAL OF THE BOOK OF PLAY

By Ron Sandritter, P.D. RALEIGH COURT # 186

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ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

I wish to thank the Dr. Christopher Nelson, M.D., of Tampa Court #89, also a lover of history, as myself, who inspired me to keep plugging until I found enough information to make this piece of work substantial and informative; AND to Ed Prange, R.Ph. also of Tampa Court #89 for the use of his Neophytes Questionnaire which helped me fill in some of the answers. I hope this fills in the blanks for those people who watch The Book of the Play time and againand still have questions. I am open to suggestions from anyone who has ideas to make this work more informative. Thank you. MIK

PART I

The Royal Order of Jesters was created during an Imperial Potentates Pilgrimage to Hawaii in the year 1911 aboard the good ship Wilhelmina. The trip was from Feb 15th to March 7th, a long time for a cruise even by todays standards. The trip was from San Francisco to Hawaii with some time on the Islands and then cruising back. It appears that the Jesters were created on the way back to San Francisco. The Imperial Potentates motto was Mirth is King. The ship did not have the shows and entertainment provided by todays cruise ships, so the passengers came up with their own games to pass the time. Popular games of the time were things like Cigarette-lighting contest, obstacle race, jousting with pillows, cracker-eating contest, and of course the three-legged race. During the voyage people were also put on trial for numerous and sundry offenses against the laws of sports, pool and social committees. The billikin was a popular symbol during the early 1900s and someone must have performed as the Billikin handing out gifts and doing silly things for the men and women aboard. While in Hawaii, a ceremonial was held in the Hawaiian Opera House on the island of Hawaii. Aloha court was formed on Thursday in the Captains office. The Order was started on the westward bound trip but the ritual was not written out in full or initiation worked up. That evening at 12 midnight, the ritual was performed on nine Nobles. The fun was immense, the comedy good and the laughter awakened sleeper in nearby staterooms. This aroused even more interest. The following night at midnight another class of 9 amateurs who thought they could act presented themselves in the Captains office and applied for admission to the Royal Jester. On the evening before disembarkation, most people went to pack up, all except the Jesters. So again, at
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midnight, in the Captains office, the stage was set, the jinks produced, and the lights were on. Performances were Romeo and Juliet, a recitation of Face on the Bar Room Floor, the song Come back to Erin, a hula dance, and a song forty five minutes from Market Street. The curtain was rung down and all retired to meet again on July 14 th at midnight in Rochester, NY. The above was Excerpts from Incidents, Happenings and Friendships of the Imperial Potentates Pilgrimage written and compiled by A.M. Allison, Islam Temple, San Francisco. Early Jester Courts reached both ends of the continent and the early ritual of poems, dances and phrolic must have been modified until the Revised and Approved standard was approved and accepted at the National Meeting in 1928. How or why it became Shakespearean in nature is not known, but was probably the idea of Eugene Lemoyne Connelly. The authorship of Book of the Play is attributed to Eugene Lemoyne Connelly of Pittsburgh Court #2. Eugene Lemoyne Connelly was born on August 18, 1876, the youngest of six sons to William Calvin Connelly and Elizabeth Connelly. His mother, having been a woman of broad education, supplemented Eugenes public school education with a very comprehensive classical study under her direction. His first newspaper work was with the Sportsman, Referee and Dramatic Critic, which was owned and edited by his brothers, William and Frank. At 17 he was on the editorial staff of the Pittsburgh Leader and served as the sporting editor, society editor, financial editor, industrial editor, political editor, city editor, editorial editor and Sunday editor. He was one of the first men in the devastated regions of the Johnstown flood and later compiled a history of the same. He was one of the earliest visitors to the Oil City holocaust and fire in the year 1892. It was through his exposure to political chicanery that the Citizens Party of Pittsburgh was organized and succeeded in dethroning and then regent political bosses. Eugene allied himself with Harry Davis (Harry was co-founder of the Nickelodeon) and had interest or was part owner in theaters in Pittsburgh, Cincinnati, Dayton and Wilmington. He was the first manager of Davis Theater when it opened in 1915 and also VP of Harris Amusement Company. Davis Theater was one an early motion picture theater, a member of the Keith circuit (RKO Keith theaters) located at 522 Smithfield St. in Pittsburgh; that site today is occupied by another building. The Keith circuit was known for the highest class refined vaudeville entertainment of the day. As an aside, Charles Lindley Davis, who owned and to whom the theater is named, held interest in the Harry Davis Stock Company (the relationship between Harry and Charles is not known) also owned the Alvin Theater in 1927 in New York City. The Theaters name was changed in 1983 to the Neil Simon Theater. In 1899, Eugene Connelly received a gold
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medal as a Member Adherent of the Academie Parisiennne Des Inventeurs Industriels et Esposants, Paris France. He proposed and founded the Associated Artist of Pittsburgh. He was a member of the Pittsburgh Press Club, the Pittsburgh Athletic Association (Pittsburgh Court #2 ROJ still holds events at this institution). He was a member of Crescent Lodge #576 in Pittsburgh and a member of the Scottish Rite. He was coroneted a 33 degree in 1921. He was a member of the Sons of the American Revolution, being the grandson of Cpt. Peter Whiteside of Washingtons Army.

PART II
This narrative will attempt to give the reader some literary and historical perspective to this great work that Jesters have come to know and love. Plays in Shakespeares day did not have the elaborate costumes, light and sound that you think of when you attend a production today. Many times the actors of a Production Company had to take on many parts, so costumes had to be changed quickly. Actors were indeed actors, as females were not allowed to act. Female parts were usually played by young boys whose voices were generally higher before they reached puberty. So it was when Jesters were new in the early 20th century. The Books of the Play were put on in various locations and if you read the ritual book, it will tell you of the use of a traveler for a curtain.

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PART III
The Book of the Play is a story of a traveling troupe of actors who came to town, lived it up, put on a bad play and then tried to leave town without paying for their food and eats. The text will have references to these food hounds often. The first scene is in a Courtroom and the candidate is questioned as to his worthiness to become a juror to try the members of this rag-tag group of actors for their offenses. Before the curtain opens, the stage is set by several characters, Life, Lilt, Laughter, Joy and Gloom, to remind you that life should have phun and phrolic and at the same time to go through this life like brother and brother: And now lets go hand in hand, not one before the other. Laughters poem reminds us of Poor Yorick from Shakespeares Hamlet . A meditation on the fragility of life. Poor Yorick - Hamlet says this in a graveyard as he looks at the skull of Yorick, a court jester he had known as a child, and grieves for him. In this complex speech, which is one of the best known in all dramatic works, Hamlet goes on to consider the fate of us all when he compares the skull to those still living: "let her paint [her face] an inch thick, to this favour *state+ she must come As a child Hamlet found the jester Yorick amusing and entertaining. They used to play and frolic in an intimate but innocent way. Now that Yorick is a smelly corpse the memory of touching him seems revolting and makes Hamlet feel ill. Laughters meditation also contains a quote from Of the Imitation of Christ by Thomas A. Kempis. In chapter 19 of Book 1 we read, For the resolutions of the just depend rather on the grace of God than on their own wisdom; and in Him they always put their trust, whatever they take in hand. For man proposes, but God disposes; is the way of man in his own hands.
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After the mirror scene, a final charge is given by Prologue to the candidates, just before the curtain rises, about how they act as jurorsYet oftimes the sinner plays the saint, I pray you, mark them well, some you may consign to heaven, others send headlong into Hell. It reminds us of that biblical truth Judge not lest ye be judged THE PRISONERS ENTRANCE- an Italian band comes in singing Hail, hail the gangs all here! Many of Shakespeares works had Italians in them. This is probably a way to make sure that requirement is met. The song was popular in the 1920s but is also a parody about the gang of prisoners. It is also a good way to bring the cast onto the stage. The candidates are then cross-examined. Once the whole jury is picked, the play goes on to present evidence against the accused actors for killing Will Shakespeare After only one witness, the actors are allowed to present examples of their histrionic art at the Opera house to show the Court that they are indeed innocent. Scene II the Opera House The examples that each member of the troupe gives are sometimes funny and sometimes serious, emblematic of that checkerboard pavement of good and evil alluded to by the property man. As you attend portrayals of the Book of the Play, you will learn about the many ways our lives can turn by the ways the actors portray their parts. Now onto the Book! The Director introduces the Tragedian as the Tragic Muse. The Tragic Muse was a serial by Henry James printed in the Atlantic Monthly 1889-1980. It was a story of conflict between demands of art and those of the real world. The Tragedians part is one of the most dramatic of the whole play. In his speech, there are references to John Drew and young Barrymore, Marlow and Maud Adams and Ed Booth. John (Jonathan) Drew (Drewland) was born in Dublin, Ireland. His family emigrated to Boston, Massachusetts, where, as a child, he got into acting. He made his first New York appearance in 1846, playing Irish and light comedy parts. He managed the Arch Street Theater. He had 3 children. His youngest, Georgiana, married Maurice Barrymore in 1876, begetting the Barrymore family. John Drew is the great-great-grandfather of Drew Barrymore. Maude Adams was a well-known actress in the early 20th century, and won positive success when she played a character in a play called The Jesters in
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January, 1908 at the Empire Theater in NYC. As the New York Times exclaimed, (the play) is light, airy, blithe, and fantastic with soft sentimental touches and a blend of gentle humor and rollicking fun. Ed Booth (1833-1893) was a brilliant famous worldwide actor in mid 19th century. He played Hamlet, Richard unexcelled. He was the manager of the Winter Garden Theater in NYC, where he gave a series of Shakespearean productions of then unexplained magnificence (1864-1867), including Hamlet, Othello and the Merchant of Venice. His career was somewhat dashed when his brother, John Wilkes Booth, shot President Lincoln. Ed and John had another brother and the 3 brothers played in Julius Caesar the year before the president was shot. In 1869, Ed built a theater of his own, Booths Theater, on the corner of 23 rd Street and 6th Ave. NYC. As he became successful again and converted his spacious residence in Gramercy Park into a club The Players Clubfor the elect of the profession. The Tragedian praises the work of Ed Booth but at the end of his speech, he exclaims There were two who read lines true and the OTHER ONE was Booth.

The Light Comedian. A Light Comedian is one who does legitimate comedy as opposed to a Low Comedian, who is a farcer. The Light Comedians story comes from the Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam. A Rubaiyat is a poem of 2 line stanzas with 2 parts per line. The poem has over 114 quatrains and is too long to be printed in its entirety, so only those verses that apply will be addressed. Also, it has been translated to English by Edward Fitzgerald. Edward Fitzgerald made 5 editions of the Rubaiyat between 1859 and 1889. The translation from Sufi to English is difficult to understand literally, so Fitzgerald takes literary license and paraphrases the work often. The original poem(s) contain between 200-600 quatrains.

The nature of a translation very much depends on what interpretation one places on Khayyam's philosophy. The fact that the Rubaiyat are a collection of quatrains - and may be selected and rearranged subjectively to support one interpretation or another - has led to widely differing versions. Nicolas took the view that Khayyam himself clearly was a Sufi. Others have seen signs of mysticism, even atheism, or conversely devout and orthodox Islam. FitzGerald gave the Rubaiyat a distinct fatalistic spin, although it has been claimed that he softened the impact of Khayyam's nihilism and his preoccupation with the mortality and transience of all things. Even such a question as to whether Khayyam was pro- or anti-alcohol gives rise to more discussion than might at first glance have seemed plausible.

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The Light Comedian starts off with.. The worldly hope.. is from quatrain XVI and in current English would read The riches people think will last so long Go sour or persist and worth retain See dew upon the grass out in the sun So fortune spent doth hardly yet remain. so friend, forsake is from quatrain LIV which reads Waste not your Hour, nor in vain pursuit Of this and that endeavor and dispute; Better be jocund with the fruitful Grape Than sadden after none, or bitter, Fruit. So be perplexed. Is from quatrain XLI which reads Oh! Plagued no more with Human and Divine Tomorrows tangle to itself resign, And lose your fingers in the tresses of The Cypress- slender minister of Wine Or in todays English . To worry of Mens Pedigree? Do not! Or of their righteous mess, their sins mundane. Ill fete the women in Seraglios Lets drown in lusty Rivers of Champagne.

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The Heavy Mans presentation is a story of how a person may be living the high life at one moment and the next moment is down on your luck. Little did the author of the Book of the Play realize that the Great Depression would start in the following year! It is a take-off of the poem by Rudyard Kipling (a Mason) Gunga Din and presented here.

YOU may talk o' gin an' beer When you're quartered safe out 'ere, An' you're sent to penny-fights an' Aldershot it; But if it comes to slaughter You will do your work on water, An' you'll lick the bloomin' boots of 'im that's got it. Now in Injia's sunny clime, Where I used to spend my time A-servin' of 'Er Majesty the Queen, Of all them black-faced crew The finest man I knew Was our regimental bhisti, Gunga Din. It was "Din! Din! Din! You limping lump o' brick-dust, Gunga Din! Hi! slippy hitherao! Water, get it! Panee lao! You squidgy-nosed old idol, Gunga Din!" The uniform 'e wore Was nothin' much before, An' rather less than 'arf o' that be'ind, For a twisty piece o' rag An' a goatskin water-bag Was all the field-equipment 'e could find. When the sweatin' troop-train lay In a sidin' through the day, Where the 'eat would make your bloomin' eyebrows crawl, We shouted "Harry By!" Till our throats were bricky-dry, Then we wopped 'im 'cause 'e couldn't serve us all. It was "Din! Din! Din! You 'eathen, where the mischief 'ave you been? You put some juldee in it, Or I'll marrow you this minute, If you don't fill up my helmet, Gunga Din!"
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'E would dot an' carry one Till the longest day was done, An' 'e didn't seem to know the use o' fear. If we charged or broke or cut, You could bet your bloomin' nut, 'E'd be waitin' fifty paces right flank rear. With 'is mussick on 'is back, 'E would skip with our attack, An' watch us till the bugles made "Retire." An' for all 'is dirty 'ide, 'E was white, clear white, inside When 'e went to tend the wounded under fire! It was "Din! Din! Din!" With the bullets kickin' dust-spots on the green. When the cartridges ran out, You could 'ear the front-files shout: "Hi! ammunition-mules an' Gunga Din!" I sha'n't forgit the night When I dropped be'ind the fight With a bullet where my belt-plate should 'a' been. I was chokin' mad with thirst, An' the man that spied me first Was our good old grinnin', gruntin' Gunga Din. 'E lifted up my 'ead, An' 'e plugged me where I bled, An' 'e guv me 'arf-a-pint o' watergreen; It was crawlin' an' it stunk, But of all the drinks I've drunk, I'm gratefullest to one from Gunga Din. It was "Din! Din! Din! 'Ere's a beggar with a bullet through 'is spleen; 'E's chawin' up the ground an' 'e's kickin' all around: For Gawd's sake, git the water, Gunga Din!" 'E carried me away To where a dooli lay, An' a bullet come an' drilled the beggar clean. 'E put me safe inside, An' just before 'e died: "I 'ope you liked your drink," sez Gunga Din. So I'll meet 'im later on
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In the place where 'e is gone Where it's always double drill and no canteen; 'E'll be squattin' on the coals Givin' drink to pore damned souls, An' I'll get a swig in Hell from Gunga Din! Din! Din! Din! You Lazarushian-leather Gunga Din! Tho' I've belted you an' flayed you, By the livin' Gawd that made you, You're a better man than I am, Gunga Din! The Soubrette. A Soubrette is a saucy, coquettish, intriguing maidservant in comic opera. Her story is a melancholy presentation of our journey through life. The Soubrettes presentation also comes from the Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam. Lets look at quatrain LXXXIII,
Yesterday This Day's Madness did prepare; To-morrow's Silence, Triumph, or Despair: Drink! For you know not whence you came, nor why: Drink! For you know not why you go, nor where. Or another translation is When you are lucky, or when mighty sick, If wondrous happy, knocked-down, or annoyed, Pour Wine! For Martyrdom or Horror worse Awaits; penned in this System you're destroyed!

Omar the Tentmaker is a story of how we live on earth and our reward in the hereafter again comes from the Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam. Lets look at quatrain LXVIII
Oh threats of Hell and Hopes of Paradise! One thing at least is certain--This Life flies: One thing is certain and the rest is Lies; The Flower that once is blown for ever dies.

And quatrain XXVI

Ah, make the most of what we may yet spend, Before we too into the Dust descend; Dust into Dust, and under Dust, to lie; Sans Wine, sans Song, sans Singer, and -- sans End!

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And in another translation is:

We'd best attempt to get Enchantment's Kiss, As handed us in the due Season rife; Why? O ye mute down under Dirt do go, To end sans Sound, sans Wants, and so -- sans Life!

The Leading Lady the Leading Lady has references to Shakespeares works but again reverts back to the Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam quatrain 77
'Tis all a Chequer-board of Nights and Days Where Destiny with Men for Pieces plays: Hither and thither moves, and mates, and slays, And one by one back in the Closet lays.

And another translation is

Life's basic Facts this Chess Match parallel: Some merely Pawns, yet others Kingly; yea, Both transient indeed, yes, and anon Both vanquished or dethroned and hid away.

The Serio-Comic references Shakespeare in nature at the beginning we come not to offend but with good will to show our simple skill, this is the true beginning of our end. A Midsummer Nights Dream Act V Scene 1

And again to the Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam quatrain XLVII

Waste not your Hour, nor in the vain Pursuit Of This and That Endeavor and Dispute; Better be merry with the fruitful Grape Than sadden after none, or bitter, Fruit.

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FINALE

The rest of the play finishes with obligations and instructions. Some minor questions that can be answered are: Who are the Venire men? Ans. The jurors of course! The salt of the earth Ans. Check Matthew 5:13 (Sermon on the Mount)

What is Durance Vile? Ans. The slammer, the hoosegow, the clinker.Jail! How many questions did the prosecuting attorney ask? Ans. The prosecuting Attorney says he will confine his examination to but three questions, but actually he asked five. Who are the Omnes? Ans. A legal term defining rights or obligations towards all. Where does the term Goodfellow come from? Ans. Goodfellow refers to Robin Goodfellow better known as puck, a mischievous character in one of Shakespeares play. What does Khayamm mean? Ans. Tentmaker Where do the code words and attributes come from? Ans. The code words and attributes are all of Hawaiian origin, since the Jesters were (after all) started on a cruise to Hawaii..Duh!

APPENDIX
THEMES

Carpe Diem (Seize the Day) .......The poet, who refers to himself as "Old Khayym," is unable to commit himself to belief in an afterlife. Consequently, he believes in living for today: Ah, make the most of what we yet may spend, Before we too into the Dust Descend; Dust into Dust, and under Dust, to lie, Sans Wine, sans Song, sans Singer andsans End!

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Wine as the Water of Life .......In a universe that refuses to reveal the ultimate destiny of man, the only intelligent way for one to relieve the anxiety about his fate, old Khayym says, is to drink the Lethe of wine. In its intoxicating nectar, one may forget the past and the future, living only for the pleasure of the moment. Wine, of course, can symbolize aesthetic and intellectual pleasures, as well as physical ones. Fate .......Pervading the poem is a sense of helplessness against forces beyond the control of man. The universe, time, and of course fate will have their way no matter what man does to counteract their power. Stanza 51 presents fate as a Moving Finger that writes man's destiny: The Moving Finger writes; and, having writ, Moves on: nor all thy Piety nor Wit Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line, Nor all thy Tears wash out a Word of it. Ineluctable Death .......Khayym strikes a somber, melancholy note when he continually reminds the reader that death will ultimately claim everyone. And after it does, he says, what then?

AUTHOR AND TYPE OF WORK

The Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam is actually the product of two authors. Khayyam wrote many quatrains. Each quatrain, though consisting of only four lines, stood alone as a separate work, usually an epigram or a special insight. Another work you may be familiar with that used this style was Nostradamus. Edward FitzGerald translated many of Khayym's quatrains and combined them into a single work with a central theme. But he also added his own insights and couched the quatrains in his own style. Some critics maintain that the poetic quality of FitzGerald's finished product exceeded that of Khayym's original quatrains. In other words, Khayym supplied the lumber, and FitzGerald built the house..

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.The Rubiyt of Omar Khayym is a lyric poem in quatrains (four-line stanzas). Rather than telling a story with characters, a lyric poem presents the deep feelings and emotions of the poet on subjects such as life, death, love, and religion. The Rubiyt was published in March 1859 but received little attention. However, after poet Dante Gabriel Rossetti (1828-1882) read and praised it in 1860, the poem became highly popular. FitzGerald revised it four times thereafter so that there are five published editions of the poem in all.

A BRIEF SUMMARY OF THE RUBAIYAT OF OMAR KHAYYAM as

..As dawn drives out darkness, I dream of a voice in the tavern crying out to fill the cup before lifes liquor runs dry. A rooster crows. Those at the tavern door beg entry, saying, You know how little while we have to stay, / And, once departed, may return no more." .......Of course, now at the beginning of spring, there is time for the thoughtful soul to visit the solitude of the garden. There he will see blossoms as white as the hand of Moses after God spoke to him (Exodus 4:6)blossoms that perfume the air like the breath of Jesus. He will also see grapes on the vine. How lucky we are to have gardens with grapes. How lucky we are to have gardens at all. Consider Iram, King Shaddad's stupendous garden city. The desert sands have swallowed it. All of its beautiful roses gone. (The Arabian Nights tells the story of King Shaddad and Iram. Sir Richard Burton's 1850 translation of of the work says that Iram was a great city of gold and silver with streets paved with rubies and pearls and planted with trees bearing yellow fruit.) Gone too are flowers resembling the magical cup of Jamshyd. (Jamshyd, or Jamshid, was a mythical Persian king.) .......But there are grapes. And if there are grapes, there will be wine. In recognition of the grape as the fruit of fruits, the nightingale cries out to a yellow rose in ancient Sanskrit (an ancient language of India) that its petals must blazon with red. .......In this fire of spring, one must fill the cup and fling off winter, for there is no time to waste. Time is a swift bird now on the wing. Come with me, old Khayyam, and let others lie about as they may. Even when people practicing Hatim Taithat well-known tradition of generositycall you to supper, heed them not. .......Yes, come with me along a strip of herbage that divides the desert from the garden, and we fill find a place beneath a bough. There, with a loaf of bread, a jug of wine, a book of verse, and you beside me singing, our wilderness will become a paradise. .......How sweet is the here and now. Although others await a better life, I say take the cash in hand and forget the rest. The worldly hope men set their hearts upon either turns to ashes or it prospers; but when it prospers, it is gone in an hour or two, like snow that lights upon the desert. Thus, those who harvest golden grain and those who throw it to the wind are alike in their in their fate. .......In this battered inn that is lifean inn whose doorways are day and nightSultan after Sultan sojourned an hour or two, then went his way. Now the lion and the lizard keep the courts where Jamshyd once sat in glory and drank deep; even the Sassanian sovereign Bahram now lies in sleep. .......I sometimes think the rose is never so red as where some buried ruler, some Caesar, bled; and every hyacinth in the garden springs from what was once a lovely head. And this delightful herb whose green adorns the edge of the riverlean upon it lightly, for who knows from what lovely lip it rises. .......Ah, fill the cup that makes us forget past regrets and future fears. Who knows what tomorrow may bring. Some that we loved as the best that time and fate could produce have already drunk their cup and now lie at rest. And we who now make merry when summer blooms will one day also lie beneath the couch of earth. So make the most of the pleasures we have left to us before we too settle into dust

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without wine, or song, or singer. Why worry about unborn tomorrow and dead yesterday when today is sweet. It is better to be merry with the grape than sad with bitter fruit. Years ago I learned this lesson and banished reason from my bed and took the daughter of the vine as my spouse. The grape can transmute leaden metal into gold. .......Destiny plays games with men, who are but pieces on a checkerboard to be moved and slain. The moving finger of fate writes its tale, and nothing we do can cancel a line. Our tears cannot wash away a single word. But do not lift your hands for help to that inverted bowl, the sky, for it rolls on, heedless. And when you yourself shall one day walk among those at rest under the grass and reach the spot where I lie, turn down an empty Glass!

THE FACE ON THE BARROOM FLOOR

"The Face on the Barroom Floor" is a poem written by Hugh Antoine D'Arcy in 1887

Written in ballad form, it tells the story of an artist ruined by love; having lost his beloved Madeline to another man, he has turned to drink. In the poem, he enters a bar and tells his story to the bartender and to the assembled crowd. He then offers to sketch Madeline's face on the floor of the bar but falls dead in the middle of his work.

'Twas a balmy summer evening and a goodly crowd was there, That well nigh filled Joes' barroom at the corner of the square.

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As songs and witty stories came through the open door, A vagabond crept slowly in and posed upon the floor. Where did it come from? someone said, The wind has blown it in. What does it want? another cried, Some whiskey, rum or gin? Here Toby, sic em, If your stomach is equal to the work, I wouldn't touch him with a fork, He's filthy as a Turk. This badinage the poor wretch took with stoical good grace. In fact, he smiled as though he thought he had struck the proper place. Come boys, I know there's kindly hearts among so good a crowd; To be in such good company would make a deacon proud. Give me a drink, thats what I want. I'm out of funds you know, when I had cash to treat the gang, This lad was never slow. What? You laugh as though you think, This pocket never held a sou, I once was fixed as well, my boys, as any of you. There thanks, thats braced me nicely. God Bless you one and all. Next time I pass this good saloon, I'll make another call. Give you a song? No, I can't do that. My singing days are past. My voice is cracked, my throat's worn out, and my lungs are going fast. Aye, give me another whiskey and I'll tell you what to do I'll tell you a funny story and in fact I'll promise two. That I was ever a decent man, not one of you would think, But I was, some four or five years back. Say, give me another drink. Fill'er up, Joe, I want to put some life into this old frame. Such little drinks, to a bum like me are miserably tame. Five fingers, that's the scene, and corking and whiskey too, Page | 17

Well, here's luck boys, and landlord, my best respects to you. Youve treated me pretty kindly, and I'd like to tell you how, I came to be this dirty sap, you see before you now. As I told you once, I was a man with muscle, frame and health, But for a blunder, ought have made considerable wealth. I was a painter, not one that daubed on bricks or wood, But an artist, and for my age I was rated pretty good, I worked hard at my canvas, and bidding fair to rise, And gradually I saw, the star of fame before my eyes. I made a picture, perhaps you've seen, it's called the Chase of Fame. It brought me fifteen hundred pounds and added to my name. It was then I met a woman, now come the funny part; With eyes that petrified my brain, and sank into my heart. Why don't you laugh it's funny, that the vagabond you see could ever have a woman and expect her love for me. But it was so, and for a month or two, her smiles were freely given, And when her loving lips touched mine, I thought I was in heaven. Boys did you ever see a girl, for whom your soul you'd give, With a form like Venus De Milo, too beautiful to live, With eyes that would beat the Koh-in-noor, And a wealth of chestnut hair? If so, it was she, for boys there never was, another half so fair. I was working on a portrait, one afternoon in May, Of a fair haired boy, a friend of mine, who lived across the way. My Madeline admired him, and much to my surprise, She said she'd like to know the lad, who had such dreamy eyes. Page | 18

She didn't take long to find him, before the month had flown, My friend had stolen my darling, and I was left alone. And ere a year of misery had passed above my head. That jewel I treasured so, had tarnished and was dead. That's why I took to drink boys. Why, I never see you smile, I thought you'd be amused boys, and laughing all the while. Why, what's the matter friend? There's a teardrop in your eye. Come, laugh like me. It's only babes and women that should cry. Say boys, if you give me just another whiskey and I'll be glad, I'll draw right here the picture, of the face that drove me mad. Give me that piece of chalk with which you mark the baseball score; You shall see the lovely Madeline upon the barroom floor. Another drink and with chalk in hand, the vagabond began, To sketch a face that well might buy the soul of any man. Then, as he placed another lock upon that shapely head, With a fearful shriek, he leaped and fell across the picture dead!

Unlike apparitions of the divine, there's no miraculous origin to the "Face on the Bar Room Floor" in the Teller House bar. It's just an oil painting on a floor. Most folks believe that it was the inspiration for a once-famous 1877 poem of the same name, about a drunk who painted it to prove that he had once been a famous artist. It was "the face that drove me mad," according to the poem, an ex-girlfriend who had jilted the artist years earlier. The only thing interesting about the painting (and the poem) was that when the guy finished, he fell down on top of it and died -- probably from malnutrition after trying to find a parking space in this tourist nightmare of a town. The truth is even less exciting. The drunk in the poem was someone that the writer met in New York City. If he ever did paint a floor there, it's long gone. This floor wasn't painted until 1936, by one or two locals (accounts vary) who knew of the poem and who painted the floor one night as a prank. But out-of-towners didn't know that, and Floor Face eventually became the most popular attraction in Central City, Colorado. It still is.

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BIBLIOGRAPHY History of Pittsburgh and environs, from prehistoric days to the beginning of the American Revolution Vol. 5 / by George Thornton Fleming, 1855-1928. http:/cinematreasures,org/theater/34480

FINIS

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