7habits of Highly Effective People

Welcome to
OF HIGHLY EFFECTIVE PEOPLE

Franklin Covey Co. &
Center for Leadership & Change, Inc.
THE
7
HABITS
Introduction
1. Name or Nickname
2. A habit I have which I believe has made
me an effective person
3. A habit which I feel will make me an
effective person

Participant Expectations
FranklinCovey
Organization Services
C L C I
Center for Leadership and Change, Inc.
The Seven Habits
of Highly Effective People
Objective:

To empower people and
organizations to significantly
increase performance
capability to achieve
worthwhile purposes in their
personal and
professional lives.

Knowledge
What, why
Skill
How to do
Desire
Want to do
HABIT
Belief or
reason
Behavior or
action
Motivation
or Will
What is a
HABIT?
Stephen R. Covey
Introduction to the Seven
Habits
Trust
O Think of a person you trust (or dont
trust) at work and in your personal life.
O Determine the reasons why you trust
(or dont trust) this person.

1998 Franklin Covey Co.
Trust
Reflection:
Why would people
trust you?
FP-03
Stephen R. Covey
Character and Personality
PERSONALITY
CHARACTER
FP-03
What we appear
to be:
techniques,
skills, behavior
What we
are: values,
feelings,
attitudes
Four Levels of Leadership
Personal
Trustworthiness
FP-04
FP-04
Individuals and groups EMPOWERED to produce
desired results
O

ORGANIZATIONAL structure and systems ALIGNED
with corporate mission and stakeholder needs
Building PERSONAL TRUSTWORTHINESS
O
TRUST on an INTERPERSONAL LEVEL
O
Stephen R. Covey
The Maturity Continuum
H7-MC
Maturity
Continuum
Dependence
Independence
Interdependence
Private
Victory
1
2
3
Public
Victory
4
5 6
7
Maturity
Courage
balanced with
Consideration
7
Sharpen the Saw
H7-MC
Dependence
Independence
Interdependence
Private
Victory
1
2
3
Public
Victory
4
5
6
Be Proactive
Begin with
the End in Mind
Put First
Things First
Think Win-Win
Seek First to
Understand,
Then to be
Understood
Synergize
Personal
Effectiveness:
Intrinsic
Security
Interpersonal
Effectiveness:
H7-MC
Dependence
Independence
Interdependence
Private
Victory
1
2
3
Public
Victory
4
5
6
Be Proactive
Begin with
the End in Mind
Put First
Things First
Think Win-Win
Seek First to
Understand,
Then to be
Understood
Synergize
7
Sharpen the Saw
Habits
Character
Personality
Principles: Natural Laws and
Fundamental Truths
Stephen R. Covey
The Seven Habits and Principles

Fundamental Truths
Fundamental Truths
Universal and timeless
Produce predictable outcomes
External to ourselves
Operate with or without our
understanding
Self-evident and enabling when
understood
Values
the worth or
priority we place
on people,
things, ideas and
principles
Self-chosen beliefs
and ideals
Internal,
subjective, based
on how we see the
world
Influenced by
upbringing, society
and personal
reflection

PRINCIPLES
Values
Habits
Balance
Everything in
moderation
Dont overeat and
overindulge.
Dont exceed
budget.
PRINCIPLES
Values
Habits
Growth
Never-ending
learning
Read a book a week.
Take at least 4 short
courses per year.
PRINCIPLES
Values
Habits
Trust
Deliver on
Commitments
Do what we promise to do,
on time.
Work on mutually agreed
upon commitments with
clear, measurable
standards.
PRINCIPLES
Values
Habits
Change
Innovation and
responsiveness
Challenge the way it has
always been done.
Be courageous and open to
take on new challenges and
learn new skills.
Be open to new ways of doing
things.
PRINCIPLES
Values
Habits
Principles
control the
consequences.
You can choose your
values, your actions,
your feelings, your
thoughts.
But you cannot
choose the
consequences.
Fundamental Truths
Stephen R. Covey
Principles Govern

Law of the Harvest
Law of the
Harvest
Which of these
principles are you able
to apply in your
profession?
Where are you having
difficulty AND can
improve?
What have you been
doing so far to cope
with these difficulties?
Preparation is a necessity.
Long-term quality is brought
about by preparation,
competence and day-to-day
discipline.
Violating natural laws ultimately
leads to failure.
You cant short-change a natural
process.
Timing and timeliness matter.
Change with the changing times.
Law of the
Harvest
Each of the 7
Habits is
aligned to
universal
principles.
Fundamental Truths
Stephen R. Covey
Paradigms

There is no reason for any individual to
have a computer in their home. (Kenneth
Olsen, 1977)
Airplanes are interesting toys but of no
military value. (Marsh. Ferdinand Foch,
1911)
Man will never reach the moon
regardless of all future scientific
advances. (Dr. Lee de Forest, 1967)
TV wont be able to hold on to any
market it captures after the first 6
months. People will soon get tired of
staring at a plywood box every night
(Daryl Zanuck, 1946)
Imagine
living in
this world if
these
paradigms
prevailed.
The telephone has many shortcomings
to be seriously considered as a means
of communication. The device is
inherently of no value to us. (Western
Union memo, 1876)
Paradigm
The way an individual perceives,
understands, and interprets the surrounding
world. A mental map.
Paradigms Lenses for
Viewing Life
Paradigms
how we make sense of
the world; how we
interpret reality;
Our PERSONAL
TRUTH,
assumption or belief
based on our
experience
Perception
Mental
map
Point of
view
Mindset
Set of
beliefs

Some people have a
grim paradigm of
life.
Some people
have a bright
and colorful
paradigm of
life!
Paradigm Shift
A turning point that causes
an individual to change the
way he/she sees things.
It involves openness it
involves risks.
A Personal Paradigm Shift Exercise
Workbook Page 13

Examine our paradigms
What are some of the
mindsets or
paradigms that are
helping us to become
the ship officers we
aim to be?
What are some of the
mindsets or
paradigms that we
need to shift within us
so that we can be the
best that we can be
as officers?
FP-05
Paradigm Shifts
Why are paradigm shifts in our
life so important?
What are some things you can do
to help facilitate Paradigm Shifts
in your own life?

FP-05
Stephen R. Covey
Paradigms and the Social
Mirror

Basic Change Model
DO
GET
SEE
FP-05
Basic Change Model
DO
GET
SEE
FP-05
If you want short-term
results, change your
actions and behavior.
If you want quantum-leap
changes, change your
paradigms.
FP-05b
DO
GET
SEE
Principles
Paradigms
Behaviors
Processes
Results
Stakeholders
Basic Change Model
A PARADIGM is in YOUR
HEAD. Whatever is in
your head may be
within your control.
Our PARADIGMS are
never complete, never
identical.
Our ACTIONS are based
on our PARADIGMS.
Our PARADIGMS can limit us.

You can be TOO FIXATED on
your paradigm and then it
becomes your own barrier.

Tearing down ones own
paradigms is like tearing down
a wall. When you tear down
your paradigm, you will need to
build a new one.
THE POWER
OF
PARADIGMS
The wisdom behind paradigm shifts
Become conscious of when your own
paradigms are starting to become barriers
rather than bridges
Re-examine your motives and afterwards,
re-think your options
Learn from the experience and the
consequences / results of your actions
Stephen R. Covey
Effectiveness

Production Capability
Effectiveness
P/PC Balance

FP-08
Production
Desired Results Assets
EFFECTIVENESS
Getting the results
that you want in a way
that allows you to get
the results again and
again

Emotional Bank Account

AMOUNT OF TRUST THAT HAS
BEEN BUILT UP IN A
RELATIONSHIP.

THE FEELING OF SAFENESS YOU
HAVE WITH ANOTHER PERSON.
THE EMOTIONAL BANK ACCOUNT
Deposits

Clear expectations

Kindness, courtesy

Making/keeping promises

Loyalty to the absent

Apologies

Seeking first to understand

Accepting responsibility
Withdrawals

Unclear expectations

Unkindness, discourtesy

Breaking promises

Disloyalty, duplicity

Pride

Seeking first to be understood

Blaming others
E. B. A. KEY IDEAS
1. We build strong and productive RELATIONSHIPS by making deposits .

2. Deposits work only when they are SINCERE and CONSISTENT.

3. Make sure the deposit is a deposit in the recipients eyes.

4. Our most CONSTANT RELATIONSHIPS require us to make the most
CONSTANT DEPOSITS.

5. Building and repairing relationships takes PATIENCE.

6. Our own DEPOSITS and WITHDRAWALS are the only things that we can
control in a relationship.
Capture: how you understood the basic content or idea
Expand: analyze and add personal experience or knowledge
Apply: share examples of present or future application
Three Person Teaching

Person A: Principles and Values
Person B: Paradigm and Paradigm Shift
Person C: Effectiveness and Emotional Bank
Account
TRUSTWORTHINESS
+
BUILDING THE
EMOTIONAL BANK ACCOUNT
=
TRUST
7
Sharpen the Saw
H7-MC
Dependence
Independence
Interdependence
Private
Victory
1
2
3
Public
Victory
4
5
6
Be Proactive
Begin with
the End in Mind
Put First
Things First
Think Win-Win
Seek First to
Understand,
Then to be
Understood
Synergize
Personal
Effectiveness
Interpersonal
Effectiveness
HABIT 1: BE PROACTIVE
AN UNDERLYING PRINCIPLE
Individuals are responsible for their own choices and
have the freedom to choose.

KEY PARADIGMS
I am responsible for my behavior and the choices I
make in life.
I can expand my personal freedom and influence
through being proactive.
HABIT 1: BE PROACTIVE
KEY PROCESSES
Recognize reactive tendencies and develop
proactive responses.
Increase your Circle of Influence.
Become a transition figure to benefit yourself and
others.
Exercise the human endowments through
conscious choice in decision making.
Stephen R. Covey
Proactivity: The Key to
Implementing the 7 Habits

Small Group Sharing

What have you learned from the
video?
Give examples wherein you
became proactive and reactive.
Proactivity vs. Reactivity
Proactivity
The power, freedom, and ability to choose
responses according to values.

Reactivity
Allowing moods, feelings, and
circumstances to drive responses.
Stephen R. Covey
Proactivity and Reactivity

Stimulus
PR-02
Response
Stimulus
PR-02
Response
Choose
According
to Values

Exercise on Proactivity/Reactivity

Break into groups of 5
One person will think of one thing he
wants to do in his life and express it to
the group.
Choose 2 members who will be the
encouragers and 2 members who will
be the discouragers.
Three Types of Determinism
Genetic-traits we inherited.
My grandparents did it to me.
Psychic-our upbringing.
My parents did it to me.
Environmental-our surroundings.
My spouse, my boss, the economy did it to me.
H1-03
Four Human Endowments
Self-Awareness
Imagination
Conscience
Independent Will

Using the Four Human Endowments
SELF-AWARENESS
Being in the moment; acknowledging current
emotions
Identifying triggers, underlying causes,
paradigms
Seeing my tendencies, my response patterns
Taking stock of consequences
IMAGINATION
Challenging my paradigms
Visualizing and developing what can be
Inventing options
Anticipating positive & negative consequences
Actively using imagination to manage emotions
Using the Four Human Endowments
CONSCIENCE
Avoiding wrong
Selecting the right alternative
Discerning the highest value
Choosing what is most congruent with my values

INDEPENDENT WILL
Just do it.

Stimulus
PR-02
Response
Stimulus
PR-02
Response
Self-Awareness
Imagination
Conscience
Independent Will
Stephen R. Covey
Circle of Influence

REACTIVE LANGUAGE
Theres nothing I can
do.
Thats just the way
I am.
He makes me so mad.

They wont allow that.

I have to do that.

I cant.
I must.
If only.

PROACTIVE LANGUAGE
Lets look at our
alternatives.
I can choose a different
approach.
I control my own
feelings.
I can create an effective
presentation.
I will choose an
appropriate response.
I choose.
I prefer.
I will.

PROACTIVE PEOPLE

Take responsibility
for their actions

Focus on things they
can do something
about

Use their inner
strengths to move
forward and find
constructive
solutions to problems
REACTIVE PEOPLE

Blame others or
circumstances

Are overwhelmed by
things they cant do
anything about

Have difficulty looking
into their inner
strengths which can
help them find solutions
CIRCLE OF
INFLUENCE
H1-05
The Promotion Exercise
Workbook Page 40
Stephen R. Covey
Becoming a Transition Figure

Becoming A Transition
Figure
Love is a verb.
Develop your proactivity muscles.
Try the 30-day challenge.
Become a Transition Person.
Stone

Transition Figure
Someone who, by being proactive,
stops destructive patterns that exist in
families and other organizations, and
sets an example that leads people to
become more proactive.

Stone
What did Stone have to overcome to
be proactive?
What allowed the boys to follow
Stone?
In what ways was Stone a transition
figure? What transitions did Stone
enable?

Becoming A Transition
Figure
Workbook Page 42
If you allow the weaknesses of other
people to affect you negatively, you are
empowering their weaknesses and
disempowering yourself.
Dont let the things you can do nothing
about interfere with the things you can do
a great deal about.
Dr. Stephen R. Covey
Application Supplement
7
Sharpen the Saw
H7-MC
Dependence
Independence
Interdependence
Private
Victory
1
2
3
Public
Victory
4
5
6
Be Proactive
Begin with
the End in Mind
Put First
Things First
Think Win-Win
Seek First to
Understand,
Then to be
Understood
Synergize
Personal
Effectiveness:
Intrinsic
Security
Interpersonal
Effectiveness:
Habit 2: Begin with the End In Mind
Principle of Mental Creation:
All things are first created in the
mind.

Habit of Purpose, Mission, Vision

What is my life all about?
What am I about?
What will I do with my life?
What is my purpose? Where am I going?
What makes life worth living?
What are the qualities of character I
would like to emulate?
What legacy do I want to leave?
Habit Two: Begin with the End in Mind
AN UNDERLYING PRINCIPLE:
Mental creation precedes physical creation.
KEY PARADIGMS:
I can choose my own future & create a vision
of it.
I will create results mentally before beginning
any activity.
Habit Two: Begin with the End in Mind
KEY PROCESSES:
1. Create & apply personal & organizational
mission statements as constitutions for daily
living.
2. Envision the desired results & important
values to guide activities or endeavors.
How can you apply Habit 2 in
your WORK?
1999 Franklin Covey Co. 4 Roles19
Habit 2: Begin with the End In Mind
Leadership is about change. Its about taking
people from where they are now to where they
need to be. The best way to get people to
venture into the unknown terrain is to make it
desirable by taking them there in their
imaginations.

Noel M. Tichy, The Leadership Engine
What you have in your mind is what will
shape your future; its what will shape
you.

Family
Spouse
Self
Religious
Organization
Money
Possessions
Work
Pleasure
Enemy
Friend
H2-01
????
What is the
center of
your life?
Family
Spouse
Self
Religious
Organization
Money
Possessions
Work
Pleasure
Enemy
Friend
H2-01
Principles
What is the
center of
your life?
How do
you
achieve a
balance?
Like individuals, organizations
operate from a variety of
centers. Organizations
operate from a number of
alternative centers and
influence decisions made.
Mission/
vision
Customer
Distributor
Profit
CEO
Systems
Competition
Employee
Structure
Program
H2-01
?????
How does the
organization
achieve a
balance?
Family
Spouse
Self
Religious
Organization
Money
Possessions
Work
Pleasure
Enemy
Friend
H2-01
Principles
BE
DO
HAVE
H2-02
Stephen R. Covey
Choosing A Life Center
3 BASIC ELEMENTS OF A PERSONAL
MISSION STATEMENT
O WHAT YOU WANT TO BE: what character strengths
you want to have, what qualities you want to
develop.
O WHAT YOU WANT TO DO: what you want to
accomplish, what contributions you want to make.
O YOUR VALUES AND PRINCIPLES: upon which
your being and doing are based.
WHY WRITE A PERSONAL MISSION STATEMENT?
Writing encourages you to think deeply about
your life.
Writing compels you to clarify and express
concisely your deepest values and aspirations.
Writing imprints your values and purposes
firmly in your mind so that it becomes a part of
you.
Writing gives you a tangible tool to keep that
vision of yourself constantly before you.
Stephen R. Covey
Four Prescriptions
PERSONAL MISSION WORKSHOP
Exercise 1: HAVE (page 57) 5 mins.
Exercise 2: DO (page 58) 7 mins.
Exercise 3: BE (page 59) 10 mins.
Get a partner and share 7 mins.
Exercise 4: BE (page 60-61) 10 mins.
Exercise 5: 5 minute continuous 5 mins.
writing (page 65)
Exercise 6: Share your personal 10 mins.
mission statement with a partner
TOTAL TIME: 54 mins.
FIVE MINUTE CONTINUOUS WRITING EXERCISE
What is my mission?
What is life asking of me?
What is the kind of person life is
asking me to be?
EVALUATING YOUR MISSION STATEMENT
Does this represent the best possible me?
Does this describe the principles I want to live by?
Does this INSPIRE me?

Carry it with you. Make notes, additions and
deletions for at least a month before you try
another draft. It may take several re-writes before
you feel satisfied with the result.
When you have a final copy, review it frequently.
Commit it to memory. This will help you keep your
vision and your values clearly in mind.
AFTER WRITING A DRAFT OF YOUR
MISSION STATEMENT...
Think of a leader at work whom you
respect and admire. What qualities
does this person have that you
would like to emulate?

What kind of a leader do you want
to be?
REFLECTION
Personal
Trustworthiness
FP-04

MISSION of the A.P. Moller-Maersk Group:
To be the preferred international ship management
organization by providing our customers vessels with
high quality, innovative and cost competitive ship
management and simultaneously ensuring that the
vessels perform:
Safely and securely
With due consideration on environmental aspects
Reliably & punctually
With the minimum consumption of fuels & lubricants
Protected against corrosion
With appearance according to company
requirements

VISION:
We will continuously strengthen our
position as the preferred provider of
World Class Ship Management for all
ship owning entities in the A.P. Moller-
Maersk Group.

VALUES of the A.P. Moller-Maersk Group
Constant care
Second to none
No detail too small, no effort too great
Responsibility


Looking at the Mission, Vision and
Values of the A.P. Moller-Maersk
Group, what are the things that you
resonate with?
What company values are aligned with
your own values?
Group Activity

Application Supplement
H3-MC
Dependence
Independence
Interdependence
Private
Victory
1
2
3
Public
Victory
4
5 6
7
Put First
Things First
Habit 1:
You are the
programmer
Habit 2:
Write the
program
Be Proactive
Begin with
the End in Mind
Habit 3:
Run the program
Habit Three: Put First Things First
AN UNDERLYING PRINCIPLE:
Effectiveness requires balancing important
relationships, roles, and activities.
KEY PARADIGMS:
Things which matter most should never be at the
mercy of things which matter least.
I will focus on importance instead of urgency.
I will improve P/PC balance within my circle of
influence.
I fulfill my mission by acting on important goals in my
key roles.
Habit Three: Put First Things First
KEY PROCESSES:
Focus on the truly important and say no to the
unimportant.
Focus on Quadrant II activities.
Plan weekly and implement daily based on
your mission, roles, goals, and priorities.
Stephen R. Covey
Your First Things

1998 Franklin Covey Co. H3-02
Whats deeply
important to me
The way I
spend my time
Stephen R. Covey
Prioritizing Your First Things

4What is the difference
between prioritizing your
schedule and scheduling your
priorities?

IMPORTANCE
4An activity is important if you
personally find it valuable, if it
contributes to your mission,
values, and high-priority goals.

URGENCY
4An activity is urgent if you or
others feel that it requires
immediate attention.

Stephen R. Covey
Living A Quadrant II Life

Time Management Matrix
H3-01
NOT URGENT URGENT
I
M
P
O
R
T
A
N
T

N
O
T

I
M
P
O
R
T
A
N
T

I
III IV
II
Crises
Pressing problems
Deadline-driven
projects, meetings
preparations
Needless interruptions
Unnecessary reports
Unimportant meetings
phone calls, mail
Other peoples issues
Trivia, busywork
Some phone calls
Time wasters
Escape activities
Irrelevant mail
Excessive TV
Preparation
Prevention
Values clarification
Planning
Relationship building
Needed relaxation
Empowerment
GROUP EXERCISE
Think of activities that fall under
your assigned quadrant.
NOT URGENT URGENT
I
M
P
O
R
T
A
N
T

N
O
T

I
M
P
O
R
T
A
N
T

I
III IV
II
High Performance Organizations
20-25%
65-80%
>1%
15%
Traditional Scheduling
M T W Th F Sa Su
H3-03
III
IV
I
I
IV
I
III
IV
III
I
II
II
II
II
II
II
M T W Th F Sa Su
More Effective Scheduling
H3-04
II
I
II
II
II
I
II
II
II
Time Management Matrix
H3-01
NOT URGENT URGENT
I
M
P
O
R
T
A
N
T

N
O
T

I
M
P
O
R
T
A
N
T

I
III IV
II
Crises
Pressing problems
Deadline-driven
projects, meetings
preparations
Needless interruptions
Unnecessary reports
Unimportant meetings
phone calls, mail
Other peoples issues
Trivia, busywork
Some phone calls
Time wasters
Escape activities
Irrelevant mail
Excessive TV
Preparation
Prevention
Values clarification
Planning
Relationship building
Needed relaxation
Empowerment
Effective people have genuine
Quadrant I crises and emergencies
that require their immediate
attention, but the number is
comparatively small. They keep P and
PC in the balance by focusing on the
important, but not urgent, activities of
Quadrant II.
-- Stephen R. Covey
Quadrant II Fire Fighters
Quadrant II Fire Fighters
Do I consider my job to be a fire
fighting job?
Is it possible to prepare for and
prevent fires even in a fire
fighting job?
What percentage of time do the
real fire fighters in this video spend in
Quadrant I as compared to
Quadrant II?
Orientation on the
Use of the Franklin Planner
CONNECT TO MISSION
What do my heart and mind tell
me to contribute, develop,
protect, preserve and support?
How can I align this coming
weeks actions with my mission?

REVIEW ROLES
Are there any roles I feel uncomfortable
with or concerned about?
Are there any roles in which I feel I
have spent too much or too little time?
Have I forgotten or neglected any
relationships within any of my roles?
Are there future roles I could be
gradually working on now?

ROLES &
MINI - MISSION STATEMENTS
HUSBAND/
FATHER/
FAMILY
MEMBER

Be an example of caring &
giving. Give family high
priority. Do things with my
children on a regular
basis.

ROLES TO GOALS
Workbook p. 93
What is the most important thing I
could do in each role this week
that would have the greatest
positive impact?
DETERMINING QII ACTIVITIES
QII activities are not typical to dos,
such as grocery shopping.
Think of extraordinary but not
overwhelming events, such as
exercise, time with an important
relationship, or preparation for an
upcoming project.
Set only one or two goals per role
each week. Dont overload yourself.

INTEGRITY IN THE MOMENT OF CHOICE
Ask with intent.
Listen without excuse.
Act with courage.

ORGANIZE WEEKLY
What happens if we organize
monthly?

What happens if we organize
daily?

RESOLVING CONFLICTS IN VALUES
Check your Circle of Focus.
Determine which value is higher.
Find a viable third alternative.

ASK THE IMPORTANT QUESTION
WHAT IS REALLY IMPORTANT
NOW?
Act on what is important instead of
reacting to what is seemingly
urgent.

END OF THE DAY EVALUATION
Have I done everything in
my plan?
Have I acted with integrity to
accomplish what was truly
most important today?

IF YOUR ANSWER IS YES,
THEN
The important rather than the
apparently urgent has determined
your course.
Your daily actions were firmly
connected to your deepest values.
You have lived one day of your life
doing exactly what you really
wanted to do.

EVALUATE LESSONS LEARNED
Was accomplishing these goals the
best use of my time?
What unmet goals should I carry into
the coming week?
What patterns of success and failure do
I see in setting and achieving goals?
What keeps getting in the way of
accomplishing my goals?
Am I creating unrealistic expectations?

Things which matter most
should never be at the mercy of
things that matter least.
-- Goethe

Ones philosophy is not best expressed
in words; its expressed in the choices
one makes. In the long run, we shape
our lives and we shape ourselves. The
process never ends until we die. And
the choices we make are ultimately
our responsibility.
--Eleanor Roosevelt

APPLICATION SUPPLEMENT
Page 17

H4-01
Dependence
Independence
Interdependence
Private
Victory
1
2
3
Public
Victory
4
5
6
7
Be Proactive
Begin with
the End in Mind
Put First
Things First
Private
Victory
Think Win-Win
Seek First to
Understand,
Then to be
Understood
Synergize
Public
Victory
7
Sharpen the Saw
H7-MC
Dependence
Independence
Interdependence
Private
Victory
1
2
3
Public
Victory
4
5
6
Be Proactive
Begin with
the End in Mind
Put First
Things First
Think Win-Win
Seek First to
Understand,
Then to be
Understood
Synergize
Personal
Effectiveness:
Intrinsic
Security
Interpersonal
Effectiveness:
Private and Public Victories
Private victories precede public
victories. You cant invert that process
anymore than you can harvest a crop
before you plant it. Its inside out.
H4-02
~Stephen R. Covey
Habit 4: Think Win-Win
Principles of Mutual Benefit
and Interdependence

Habit of ensuring that while I will get
what I want , I will also help the other
person get what he wants.
Principles
Effective, long-term
relationships require
mutual benefit.
Paradigms
I seek the benefit of others as well as
my own.
I get better results in my relationships
by cooperating interdependently than
by competing independently.
Processes
Balance courage and consideration
in seeking mutual benefit.
Persist in looking for Win-Win
outcomes despite past Win-Lose
conditioning.
Think Win-Win
(Interpersonal
Leadership)
Habit 4

Win-Lose Conditioning

Exercise
6 Paradigms of Human Interaction
WIN/WIN
WIN/LOSE
LOSE/WIN
LOSE/LOSE
WIN
WIN/WIN OR NO DEAL

Interactions
Workbook page 108
WIN WIN
IS
A courageous effort.
The best way to get to
interdependent
relationships.
A philosophy of human
interaction supported by
an Abundance Mentality.
A character-based code
for interactions.

IS NOT
Always being nice.
Always achievable.

A manipulative
technique.

A personality-based
thought pattern.

Is thinking win-
win realistic or
not? What can we
do to make it
happen?
Stephen R. Covey
Believing in Win-Win

Think Win-Win

Stephen R. Covey
Win Win Rescripting
For Win-win to be realistic
Both parties listen first, and talk
communicate.
There must be a paradigm shift.
Both parties clarify what their ultimate
shared objective should be.
Both parties agree that they will help
each other arrive at a beneficial
solution.
They BOTH come up with options and
alternatives to solve the problem.
4 DIMENSIONS OF WIN-WIN

Win-Win
Character

Win-Win
Relationships

Win-Win
Agreements
Win-Win Systems and Processes
4
1
2
3
Integrity

Maturity

Abundance Mentality
Integrity

People of integrity are true
to their feelings, values and
commitments.
Maturity
Mature people express their ideas and
feelings with courage and consideration
for the ideas and feelings of others.
CONSIDERATION
C
O
U
R
A
G
E
W-W
L-W
W-L
MATURITY
L-L
Low
High
Low High
Abundance/Scarcity Mentality
Abundance Mentality

Theres plenty out there for everybody.
Scarcity Mentality

There isnt enough to go around so I
better get mine first.
H4-04
Abundance Mentality
H4-04
The paradigm that there is plenty
out there for everyone.
Flows out of a deep inner sense of
personal worth and security.
Results in sharingof prestige,
recognition, profits, decision-
making.
Appreciates the uniqueness, the
inner direction, and proactive
nature of others.

Scarcity Mentality
H4-04
The paradigm that life has only so much;
theres only one pie and if someone were to
get a big piece, it would mean less for
everyone else.
Has difficulty sharing recognition and credit,
power or profit.
Has difficulty being genuinely happy for the
successes of other people.
Always comparing, always competing
In a team, sees differences as signs of
insubordination and disloyalty.

ESTABLISHING WIN-WIN RELATIONSHIPS
WITH WIN-LOSE PEOPLE

Focus on your Circle of Influence.
Make deposits through genuine courtesy,
respect and appreciation for the person
and his point of view.
Stay in the communication process
longer.
Listen more, and in great depth.


Express yourself with greater courage.
Go deep inside yourself for the strength
of character to be proactive.
Keep on until the other person realizes
that you genuinely want the resolution to
be a real win for both of you.
Always remember there are different
ways to get to a solution:

His way
Your way
A better third way -- both your ways
combined creatively.
Where are we the same?
Where are we different?
How can we leverage on our
similarities?
How will we manage our
differences?
Win-Win Agreements
Think Win-Win
esired esults
uidelines
esources
ccountability
onsequences
Win-Win
Agreements
Elements of a
Win-Win
Agreement
Desired Results:
Clarify the end in mind,
objectives and outcome.
Guidelines:
Specify boundaries and
deadlines for accomplishing the
results.
Resources:
Specify the human,
financial, technical &
organizational resources
available for accomplishing the
desired results.
Elements of a
Win-Win
Agreement
Accountability:
Identify the standards and
methods for measurement of
progress and accomplishment.

Consequences:
Determine the outcome
related with achieving or not
achieving the desired results.
Elements of a
Win-Win
Agreement
Page 19
H5-MC
Dependence
Independence
Interdependence
Private
Victory
1
2
3
Public
Victory
4
5
6
7
Be Proactive
Begin with
the End in Mind
Put First
Things First
Think Win-Win
Seek First to
Understand,
Then to be
Understood
Synergize
Root
Route
Fruit
I Know Just What You Mean

HABIT 5: SEEK FIRST TO UNDERSTAND,
THEN TO BE UNDERSTOOD
UNDERLYING PRINCIPLES
Diagnosis must precede prescription.
Understanding comes through listening.
KEY PARADIGMS
I assume I dont fully understand, and I need
to listen.
If I listen first to understand, then I will be
better understood.
KEY PROCESS
Use Empathic Listening skills.
Stephen R. Covey
Diagnose Before You Prescribe

1. Describe a time when someone didnt
listen to you before prescribing an
answer.
2. How did you feel?
3. When do you most often fail to listen to
others? Why?
Diagnose Before You Prescribe
Workbook - Page 127
Listening Continuum

5. Empathic Listening
4. Attentive Listening
3. Selective Listening
2. Pretend Listening
1. Ignoring

Stephen R. Covey
Autobiographical Responses

Autobiographical Responses
Advising: prescribing
Probing: asking questions
Interpreting: figuring the person out
Evaluating: agreeing or disagreeing
H5-01
SKILL
ATTITUDE
Two Parts of
Empathy
EMPATHIC LISTENING
Listen with the intent to
understand
Listen with ears, eyes
and heart
How We Communicate
7%
Words We Use
38%
How We Say Words,
Sounds We Make
55%
Nonverbals,
Body Language
H5-02
THE SKILL OF LISTENING
Understanding what the other
person is saying
Understanding what the other
person is not saying
Making the other person feel
understood
Empathic Responses
Repeat, verbatim, what was said.
Rephrase content.
Reflect feelings.
Rephrase content and reflect feelings.
Discern when not necessary or
appropriate.
Empathic Listening Responses
H5-04
BEGINNING AN EMPATHIC
RESPONSE...
Let me see if I understand what
youre saying...
Correct me if Im wrong...
Youre saying...
You feel...
It seems to you that...
So as you see it
BEGINNING AN EMPATHIC
RESPONSE...
As I get it, you felt that...
Im picking up that you...
What I guess Im hearing is...
Im not sure Im with you, but...
You place a high value on...
I sense that you are feeling...
Reflect Content

1. Im really worried about my job. Im
getting old and Im afraid theyre going to
fire me and get some teenager fresh from
high school to take my place.
YOURE WORRIED THAT YOULL BE
REPLACED BY SOMEONE YOUNGER.
2. This job is difficult because Im new at it.
But given time, I think Ill do okay.
YOURE STRUGGLING NOW, BUT
YOURE CONVINCED YOU CAN DO IT.
Reflect Feeling

1. I dont understand my senior officer. One
day hes telling me what a great worker I
am, and the next day hes criticizing my
work in front of everyone.
YOU FEEL ________________.
2. Transferring to a new department was
just what I needed. I get along really well
with my new boss and all of my co-
workers.
YOU FEEL ________________ IN
YOUR NEW POSITION.
Reflect Content and Feeling

YOU FEEL _______ BECAUSE ________.
1. Ive worked so hard this past year. Ive
worked twice as hard as anyone else in
this ship, but I never get a promotion.
YOU FEEL ANGRY BECAUSE YOUR
SUPERIORS HAVE NOT RECOGNIZED
YOUR HARD WORK.
Reflect Content and Feeling

YOU FEEL _______ BECAUSE ________.
2. I dont know why I was transferred to this
department. I wasnt given any reason.
They just sent me and I dont like it.
YOU FEEL PUZZLED AND RESENTFUL
BECAUSE YOU WERE TRANSFERRED
WITHOUT AN EXPLANATION.
PRACTICE

It seems as if all I do is follow new instructions
from different officers. I never have time to get
my work done, plus this new push on quality is
driving me crazy! I just dont know how to
handle all of this!
Exercise

Responding Empathically

Workbook Page 137
When we are not sure we understand
When we are not sure the other
person feels understood
When the interaction has a strong
emotional component
Use Empathic Listening
H5-03
OTo understand the other
person, we must be willing to
see the possibility we could
both be right and yet have
opposite views.
Empathic listening allows people to
express and explore their feelings at
their own pace, and in their own
direction.
- Stephen Covey

Page 21
Dependence
Independence
Interdependence
Private
Victory
1
2
3
Public
Victory
4
5
6
7
Be Proactive
Begin with
the End in Mind
Put First
Things First
Think Win-Win
Seek First to
Understand,
Then to be
Understood
Synergize
Mutual Benefit
Empathic
Communication
Creative
Cooperation
H6-MC
HABIT 6: SYNERGIZE
AN UNDERLYING PRINCIPLE
The whole is greater than the sum of
its parts.
KEY PARADIGMS
I value the Differences in others and
seek the Third Alternative.
Working together cooperatively takes
time but produces better long-term
results.
HABIT 6: SYNERGIZE
KEY PROCESSES
Apply win-win thinking (Habit 4) and
empathic communication (Habit 5) to
seek synergistic outcomes, including
the Third Alternative (Habit 6).
Use synergy ground rules to discover
the Third Alternative.
Stephen R. Covey
The Process of Synergizing

SYNERGY
The whole is greater than the
sum of its parts. Synergy takes
place when two or more people
produce more together than the
sum of what they could have
produced separately.
When geese fly in formation,
they travel 70% faster than
when they fly alone.
Geese share leadership. When
the lead goose tires, it rotates
back into the V and another flies
forward to become the leader.
Geese keep company with the fallen.
When a sick or weak goose drops out
of the flight formation, at least one
other goose joins to help and protect.
THE PROCESS OF SYNERGIZING
TO SYNERGIZE IS
Results-oriented, positive
synergy.
Examining, exploring,
seeking diverse perspectives
openly enough to alter or
complete your paradigm.
Cooperating
Having a mutually agreed-
upon end in mind.
Worth the effort and highly
effective.
A process.
TO SYNERGIZE IS NOT
A brainstorming free-
for-all.
Accepting others
ideas as full truth.

Win-lose competition.
Group think (giving in
to peer pressure).
Always easy.
Only a negotiation
technique.
Synergy Question
Can you have synergy without having
arrived at the Third Alternative

?
H6-01
Synergy Model
Habits 4, 5, & 6
The Action and
Process
Synergize
Problem
or
Opportunity
Synergy
H6-02
Blocks to Synergy

Blocks to Synergy?
POSSIBLE SYNERGY BLOCKS
Low trust
Low cooperation
Defensiveness
Finger-pointing
Confessing others
sins
Politicking
Rivalry
Lack of purpose
Sarcasm
Fear or losing your job
Wasnt invented
here syndrome
Organizational.
boundaries
Prejudice
VALUING THE
DIFFERENCES...
...is the essence of synergy. And
the key is to realize that all
people see the world not as it is,
but as they are.
VALUING THE
DIFFERENCES...
...is the essence of synergy. And
the key is to realize that all
people see the world not as it is,
but as they are.
Valuing & Celebrating
the Differences
Celebrate!
Value
Accept
Tolerate
VALUING THE DIFFERENCES
1. TOLERATE: to endure or put up with
someones differences.
2. ACCEPT: to consent to someones
differences; to regard them as proper,
suitable, or normal.
3. VALUE: to be open and see someones
differences as worthwhile.
4. CELEBRATE: to deeply understand
anothers point of view, and to be able to
explain that point of view as well as or
better than he or she could to someone
else with an opposing view.
Compromise:
A Low Form of Win-Win
Compromise means that 1 + 1 = 1.
Both give and take.
The communication isnt defensive,
protective, angry, or manipulative;
it is honest, genuine, and respectful,
but it isnt creative or synergistic.
It produces a low form of win-win.
~Stephen R. Covey
H6-03
+We cant create synergy directly. It is
a byproduct, and trying too hard to
create it can actually prevent it. Our
goal, therefore, is not only to create
synergy, but to create the climate in
which it thrives.
Application Exercise

OUnequal Resources

Mauritius

The Perspective of Humility

Page 164

5
Page 23
H7-MC
Dependence
Independence
Interdependence
Private
Victory
1
2
3
Public
Victory
4
5
6
Be Proactive
Begin with
the End in Mind
Put First
Things First
Think Win-Win
Seek First to
Understand,
Then to be
Understood
Synergize
7
Sharpen the Saw
FP-08b
Assets
Production Capability
Effectiveness
P/PC Balance

Production
Desired Results
Stephen R. Covey
The Four Dimensions

Four Dimensions
Physical
Mental
Spiritual
Social/Emotional
H7-01
FOUR DIMENSIONS OF RENEWAL
PHYSICALCaring effectively for our
physical body
MENTALDoing meaningful things to build
our mind
SOCIAL/EMOTIONALBuilding our ability
to relate with people
SPIRITUALRenewing our commitment to
our value system

FOUR DIMENSIONS OF RENEWAL
PHYSICAL Exercise, Nutrition, Stress
Management
MENTAL Reading, Visualizing, Planning,
Writing
SOCIAL/EMOTIONAL - Service,
Empathy, Making Deposits in EBA
SPIRITUAL - Value Clarification, Study
& Meditation, Prayer

Stephen R. Covey
The Physical, Mental, and
Spiritual Dimensions

Consider the Consequences
What would be the consequences of
neglecting the Physical dimension?

PLANNING YOUR RENEWAL
Independent Dimensions
Workbook pages 173-175

Interdependent Dimension
Workbook page 177

Stephen R. Covey
The Social/Emotional Dimension

One More time
Read your mission statement, your roles
and goals.
With these in mind, what SHARPEN THE
SAW ACTIVITIES can you think of that
you will commit to doing to help you
develop your four dimensions?
Survival / Revival

+ The most practical, beautiful, workable philosophy in
the world wont workif you wont.
--Zig Ziglar
+ One of the marks of superior people is that they are
action-oriented. One of the marks of average people
is that they are talk-oriented.
--Brian Tracy

ACTION
Stephen R. Covey
Conclusion

7habits of Highly Effective People

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