Developing Social Awareness and Relationship Management

Session V

Social Awareness
Ability to perceive and understand the social relationships and structure in the social environment. Being able to understand, how others are feeling and validating those feelings. Being able to recognise the relationship and structures in the environment or social networks

Social Awareness definitions

Social Awareness
Awareness of others feelings, needs or concerns

Empathy (mandatory)
Sensing others feelings and perspectives, and taking an active interest in their concerns

Organizational Awareness
Reading a groups emotional currents and power relationships

Service Orientation
Anticipating, recognizing, and meeting customers needs

Annoying People
Think of one person (at least one) whose company you do not enjoy. What about these people annoys you?
Write down as many characteristics as you can remember, no matter how trivial.

Agreeable People
Think of one person (at least one) whose company you enjoyone of those special people. What about these people do you like?

Write down as many characteristics as you can remember, no matter how trivial.

Compare
Place the characteristics of these two types of people side by side on your paper.
What do you avoid? What do you seek out?

Most people see positive behaviors to be more attractive than negative behaviors.

Karl Albrecht also identified these terms:

Social Halitosis Social Flatulence Social Dandruff

Social Halitosis
Inauthentic, inconsiderate behavior
This is someone who invades your space and keeps talking with you even though youve tried to end the discussion. People such as these are completely incapable of seeing how they are disregarding the social rights of others.
They treat others as things, entities, non-beings, and they see others only there for their own selfish purposes. We have no obligation to listen to these people.

Social Flatulence
Insensitivity and lack of situational awareness (or, possibly worse, lack of respect for the accepted norms of behavior).
This would be someone who would shout out a loud, inappropriate remark It is ignorance of appropriate social behavior.

Social Dandruff
Behavior that selfishly imposes ones interests on others.
This would include music blaring from the next house, car, or cubicle. It may be the coworker who comes in every day, sits down, and talks with your as though that is all you have to do. Another example would be those who ask favors inappropriate to the relationship, or the one who always decides where to go for lunch. These people spray everyone in sight or within hearing of their views.

These behaviors come from:

Lack of insight or concern for ones impact on others. These behaviors represent self-centered, selfish, and self-serving behaviorsthose lacking in consideration for others.

Categories of Competence
1. Situational Awareness: The type of social radar where you can read situations and interpret the behaviors of people in these situations. Interpreting people includes their intentions, emotional states, and anticipated actions. 2. Presence: Also called bearing, presence includes verbal and non-verbal patterns, appearance, posture, voice quality, and movements. This is what others process to evaluate their impression of you.

Categories of Competence
1. Authority: The radar of others to pick up signals from us that lead them to judge us as trustworthy, honest, ethical, open, or the oppositeunauthentic. 2. Clarity: The ability to explain yourself, illuminate ideas, transfer data and information accurately and clearly, and articulate your views. 3. Empathy: Having a feeling for someone else or sympathizing with them. Empathy is a shared feeling between two people.

Working on Yourself
Karl Albrecht suggests focusing on one element each day per week. First you need to be aware of how others see you.

What qualities or characteristics do you want to possess by the time you complete your PGP?

Turn to your neighbor and share your thoughts.

Social Skills

Expertise in building and maintaining relationship Ability to reach agreement and keep a harmonized relationship with others

Socially Skilled: The ability to respond to social activities or environments in a manner that produces, maintains, & enhances positive interpersonal effects. Social Competence OR Social-Emotional Health Ones overall social capability the composite or multitude of desires & abilities that result in being socially skilled. So what makes you so socially able? -Motivated to learn appropriate actions -Perceive social situations accurately -Able to identify the skills to use -Able to adequately perform the necessary skills -Sensitive to social feedback -Can tweak behaviours to fit situational requirements -Willing & able to emulate behaviours of others -Able to generalize to appropriate situations .

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Social Skills
Different Realms 1. Survival: Form the basic foundation for acquisition of more advanced skills & those in other realms such as: 1. Social interaction 2. Appropriate classroom behavior, work habits, & academic survival skills. (see below) 2. Interpersonal: Enhance chances of successful social interaction with persons of all ages & relationships. 3. Problem solving: Thinking strategies to prevent social problems or escape social discomfort. 4. Conflict resolution: Dealing with highly emotional situations, & resolving existing intra-personal & interpersonal conflicts. 5. Others are often listed, like Interpersonal perspective taking, Feelings identification, Communication skills, etc. However, well address the first four.

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Recognizing Social Skills

Socially skilled people Have wide circle of acquaintances Find common grounds with people of all kinds Easily building rapport

Apt at managing teams

Expert persuaders, negotiators Know when to make emotional or rational appeal Excellent collaborators Spread to others passion for work

Driven to find solutions

Recognizing Social Skills (cont.)

May appear idle at work
Chat, joke, socialize with unrelated departments

Dont limit scope of relationships

Build wide network of contacts

Tomorrow, they may need help from the people they are just getting to know today

Social Skills: Implications

Leaders need to manage relationship

Their task: get things done through others Motivation, passion: must be communicated

Social skills make this possible

A key leadership capability Allow leaders to put their emotional intelligence to work

Survival Skills
What are the basic social skills? When in someones presence, Acknowledge the other person Listen attentively & respond appropriately Conduct an accurate on-going self-evaluation of behaviour Self reinforce for success

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Interpersonal Skills
To enhance the chances of social success & building of friendships, one must know how to? Share Ask Join Contribute Answer Interrupt a busy person or conversation Wait for ones turn or authority figures attention Begin/End a conversation Give/Accept compliments.

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Conflict resolution (intra & interpersonal)

Includes social skills for dealing with lifes frustration & threats. They include being able to deal with Being left out Negative peer pressure. Teasing & taunting Accusations Anger directed at you by others The urge or pressure to fight Losing Making mistakes (publicly & privately) Fear Anger .

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Variables that Influence Social Skills

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Examples of Social Skills

COMMUNICATION
Takes turns in conversations Makes eye contact when talking

ENGAGEMENT
- Makes friends easily - Invites others to join in activities

COOPERATION
Follows your directions Follows classroom rules

SELF-CONTROL
- Makes a compromise during a conflict - Stays calm when teased

ASSERTION
Asks for help from adults Questions rules that may be unfair

RESPONSIBILITY
Respects the property of others Takes responsibility for own actions

EMPATHY
Forgives others Feels bad when others are sad

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Behaviours reflecting social competence

Accepts others for what they are; Admits mistakes;

Displays interest in the world at large;

Is on time for appointments; Has social conscience; Thinks before speaking and doing;

Displays curiosity;
Does not make snap judgements; Makes fair judgements; Assesses well the relevance of information to a problem at hand; Is sensitive to other people's needs and desires; Is frank and honest with self and others; and Displays interest in the immediate environment.

Developing: Social Competence

Understands people's thoughts, feelings, and intentions well; Is good at dealing with people;

Has extensive knowledge of rules and norms in human relations;

Is good at taking the perspective of other people; Adapts well in social situations; Is warm and caring; and Is open to new experiences, ideas, and values.

Empathy How to have empathic communication with others?

What is the physiology of empathic communication?

Social Awareness How to have effective group interactions? How to listen positively? What are the Negative Listening Types? How to raise your social awareness through listening? Relationship Management

What are the Six Human Needs?

How to recognise others needs and desires? How to categorise people based on their needs to make useful conclusions on follow up actions?

Stages
Awareness of Self Understanding of emotions Enhance sensitivity to the feelings of others Take the perspective of the other person

Empathy
Most challenging of all the skills. Seek to truly understand the position of other person.

Discipline that Builds Empathy

C - Call attention to the insensitive, uncaring behaviour. A - Ask, How would you feel? R - Recognize the consequences of the behaviour E - Express and explain your disapproval of the insensitive behaviour.

Suggest.....
Jill has just moved to a new apartment. She just finished completed the entire decoration of the house. Suddenly her friend, Tina, came in and said Oh what horrible curtains!!! You must change them..... Jill asked..How did you liked rest of my bedroom?

Suggest...
Sonu was in a a restaurant He spilled some coffee on the floor by mistake. I will get you another cup of coffee said the waiter and the waiter left. Sachin was another customer in the restaurant standing next to cashier, waiting to pay. Sonu went up to Sachin and said, I spilled coffee over my table, can you mop it?......

Thank You