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The Third Side

William L. Ury
Harvard University

2000 William L. Ury

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The Challenge
What will it take to transform
destructive conflict
into
constructive conflict
at home,
at work,
in the community
& in the world?
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Two Sides of the Conflict

Side 1

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Side 2

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The Third Side of the Conflict

Side 3

Side 1

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Side 2

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Who is the Third Side?

Outsiders
(e.g. neighbors, neutrals, bystanders)

Side
1 1

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Insiders
(e.g family, friends,
the parties themselves)

Side 2

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What Will It Take?

A Mobilized Community
Acting Systematically

Motivated by a New Story

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A Mobilized Community

Everyone is a Thirdsider

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Acting Systematically
Focus on: Prevention,
Resolution and Containment

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Escalation of Conflict
Destructive Violence

Power Struggle
Overt Conflict
Latent Tensions
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Why Conflict Escalates

Destructive Violence

Power Struggle
Overt Conflict
Frustrated needs
Latent Tensions

Poor skills
Weak relationships

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Why Conflict Escalates

Destructive Violence

Power Struggle

Conflicting interests
Disputed rights

Overt Conflict
Latent Tensions
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Unequal power
Injured relationships

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Why Conflict Escalates

Destructive Violence
No attention

Power Struggle

No limitation
No protection

Overt Conflict
Latent Tensions
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Catching Conflict Before it Escalates

Destructive Violence
Power
Struggle

Contain

Overt
Conflict

Resolve

Latent
Tensions

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Prevent

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Prevent

Sources of Tension

Ways to Prevent

Frustrated needs

The Provider

Poor skills

The Teacher

Weak relationships

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The Bridge-Builder

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Resolve

Sources of Conflict
Conflicting interests

Ways to Resolve
The Mediator

Disputed rights

The Arbiter

Unequal power

The Equalizer

Injured relationships
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The Healer
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Contain

Sources of Struggle

Ways to Contain

No attention

The Witness

No limitation

The Referee

No protection

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The Peacekeeper

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Motivated by a New Story

From
Fighting is Inevitable.
To
Fighting is Preventable.

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A Timeline of Human Conflict

10,000
Years of
Coercion

2,500,000 Years of Possible Coexistence

2,500,000
B.C.

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1,000,000
B.C.

2,000
A.D.

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Fighting is ...
Inevitable

Preventable

We have always fought

Coexistence for 99%

It is human nature

It is human choice

There is no other way

There is the Third Side

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Is this a private fight

or
can anyone get in?
Old Irish saying

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What Will It Take?

THE THIRD SIDE
A Mobilized Community

Acting Systematically
Motivated by a New Story

2000 William L. Ury

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