Emotional Intelligence

The Other side of Smart

Happiness and Sadness

Presenter: Huma Sikandar

History of Emotional Intelligence
The term emotional intelligence was officially
coined in 1990 by Salovey and Mayer
In the 1990s Daniel Goleman became aware of
Salovey and Mayers work, and this eventually
led to his book, Emotional Intelligence. Goleman
was a science writer for the New York Times,
specialising in brain and behaviour research
What is emotional Intelligence?
One simple definition of emotional intelligence
is the ability to identify, assess, and control
the emotions of oneself, of others, and of groups
Self-awareness
developing a positive sense of self-worth
Problem-solving/Decision-making
Emotional management / Impulse control
Relationship-building / Empathy / Social Skills
Taking responsibility for ones actions
Basic Skills for Emotional Intelligence
The emotionally intelligent person is skilled in four
areas:
identifying emotions,
using emotions,
understanding emotions, and
regulating emotions.
John Mayer and Peter Salovey
Definitions
Emotional intelligence is the ability to sense,
understand, and effectively apply the power and
acumen of emotions as a source of human
energy, information, connection, and
influence. -- Robert K. Cooper. Ph.D.
Emotional intelligence is the ability to perceive,
appraise and express emotions accurately and
adaptively. (Khosla, Dokania, 2010).
IQ V/s EQ
(Intelligent Quotient versus Emotional Quotient)

Research Shows that

IQ can Help you to be
successful to the
extent of 20% In your
life.
The Rest of 80%
Success depends on
your EQ.
 We get hired for our IQ
We get fired for our EQ

We get promoted for our EQ

 Emotional Intelligence is a way of recognizing,
understanding, and choosing how we think, feel,
and act. It shapes our interactions with others and
our understanding of ourselves. It defines how
and what we learn; it allows us to set priorities; it
determines the majority of our daily actions.
Research suggests it is responsible for as much as
80% of the success in our lives. J. Freedman

As much as 80% of adult success comes from

EQ. Daniel Goleman
 In a study of skills that distinguish star
performers in every field from entry-level jobs
to executive positions, the single most important
factor was not IQ, advanced degrees, or
technical experience, it was EQ. Daniel
Goleman
Quotes on Emotional Intelligence
The more socially intelligent you are, the happier and more robust
and more enjoyable your relationships will be. Daniel Goleman

The only way to change someone's mind is to connect with them

from the heart. -- Rasheed Ogunlaru

No doubt emotional intelligence is more rare than book smarts,

but my experience says it is actually more important in the making
of a leader. You just can't ignore it. -- Jack Welch

It isn't stress that makes us fall--it's how we respond to stressful

events. -- Wayde Goodall
Seven Basic Emotions
Anger
Happiness
Fear
Disgust
Surprise
Love
Sadness
Coping with Emotions
We typically deal with emotions one of four ways:

1) exaggerating the emotion so that we are overwhelmed by

them and lose control;

2) accepting the emotion and not try to regain control;

3) substituting the emotion with something more

comfortable like distractions; or

4) managing the emotion through self-awareness.

Happiness
Its that feeling that when you are smiling,
everything is smiling back at you.
Happiness is not an act, it is what you are; your
state of being.
Happiness is acceptance of things as they are.
Its a place where there is no room for self pity.
You are in love with yourself, with your every
emotion, with everything thats around you.
Measurement of Happiness in Social Science
Research

Psychologists have mainly focused on human unhappiness

and neglected the positive aspects of human potential

Happiness is defined as `the degree to which an individual

judges the overall quality of his life-as-a-whole positively',
or in short: how well one likes the life one lives.

In this way, happiness belongs to a wider class of

subjective appraisals of life, which is usually referred to as
subjective well-being (SWB) or life satisfaction.
Elements of subjective well-being

1. Happiness:
an emotional state.
how you feel about yourself and the
world.
2. Satisfaction with Life:
more global judgment about your
acceptance with your life.
more of a cognitive assessment.
Last element of SWB
3. Emotional stability:
low level of neuroticism.
lack of serious personality flaws.
What is Sadness?
Sadness is the sinking feeling inside you.
Its a place of fear which embraces miseries.
It is a state of loneliness
Best of things or situations doesnt helps you in
getting out of it.
Life looks gloomy, dull and purposeless.
SADNESS
In psychology, sadness is an emotional response
to the sense of loss. The loss can be anything
that is valuable to a person, such as the loss
of a loved one, the loss of possession, or the
loss of achieved goals.
Where does these emotions emerge from?
All the emotions are generated in one key area of brain called
Limbic system.

Life is series of emotions which you produce when you encounter

different situations. Emotions decide the quality of life you have.

Its not external events which makes you feel good or happy or sad.
Its your reactions to different experiences, makes you feel what
you feel.

So, in order to achieve genuine happiness in your life, you need to

lead a life based on quality emotions.
Why it is important to understand your
emotions?
Normal belief that happiness is associated with tangible things e.g
good job, beautiful spouse, a complete family, exotic adventures etc.

If you lose a job youll be sad. Isn't it?

But if I tell you that losing a job is an opportunity to make you

realize that you are much more than this job. Unleash your potential
by finding a better job or starting your own set up of business.

How do you feel when you transcend your mind space from a zone of
losing job with sad to happy emotions considering losing job an
opportunity for a better future?
How our mind works
Our mind is very tricky, it can produce different emotions for
similar situations

What if I tell you that situations arent the reasons for your
misery or sadness. Its your emotions or generation of those
chemicals in your brain which generate emotions depending
upon how you look at things.

Some people feel more anxious than others or more happier

than others under the same situation same scenarios. WHY?
Because over a period of time people make their own belief
system, it is unique for each individual.
Key to get quality emotions in your life
Key is to break your belief system, if you feel it is
wrong.
Try to find your answers to simple questions like
why you are angry? or why you are happy? or why
you feel sad? or why you experience self pity?
Finding these answers will drain you, but
remember it will lead you to finding a better
mindful life. You might not find your answers
initially, but be persistent.
 Further, emotions which cause misery, suffering, jealousy, anger,
anxiety, ashamed, depressed, impatient, hatred, arrogant, pride,
obsessed, paranoid, rage, rejected, resentful and similar other
emotions needs to be checked constantly.

How often you feel them?

What triggers them?

How do you react to when you are experiencing those emotions? Get
into deep conversation with yourself on each of these emotions.

Get rid of Rumination thoughts.

Quotes on Happiness
Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is
the key to success. If you love what you are doing,
you will be successful. --Albert Schweitzer

Whatever you decide to do, make sure it makes you

happy. --Paulo Coelho

Plenty of people miss their share of happiness, not

because they never found it, but because they
didnt stop to enjoy it. --William Feather
 Everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the
happiness and growth occurs while youre climbing it. --Andy
Rooney

The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance, the wise

grows it under his feet. --James Oppenheim

The greater part of our happiness or misery depends upon

our dispositions, and not upon our circumstances. --Martha
Washington

Happiness is a habit cultivate it.--Elbert Hubbard

When life gives you a hundred reasons to cry,
show life that you have a thousand reasons to
smile Stephenie Meyer, Twilight
Thank you