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Who Am I?
I am your constant companion? I am your greatest helper
or heaviest burden. I will push you onward or drag you
down to failure. I am completely at your command. Half
the things you do you might just as well turn over to me
and I will be able to do them quickly and correctly. I am
easily managed-you must merely be firm with me. Show
me exactly how you want something done and after a few
lessons I will do it automatically. I am the servant of all
great individuals and also, of all failures, as well. Those
who are great, I have made great. Those who are failures,
I have made failures. I am not a machine, though I work
with all the precision of a machine plus the intelligence
of a human. You can run me for a profit or run me for
ruin-it makes no difference to me. Take me, train me, be
firm with me, and I will place the world at your feet. Be
easy with me and I will destroy you. Who am I?
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The teenage years are a
very stressful time.

Problems arise daily. We

cannot totally cure the
problems of life; we can
only manage them. 3
 Seven Habits of Highly
Unsuccessful Teens:

Habit #1
React
Blame all of your problems on
someone else. Be the victim. Take
no responsibility for your life. If
someone yells, yell back. 4
 Habit #2
Begin With no End
in Mind
Dont have a plan
Avoid goals at all
costs. Never think
about tomorrow.
Only live for the
moment. Dont
think about the
consequences of
your actions. 5
 Put First Things Last
Whatever is most important in your life
dont do it until you have spent sufficient
time talking on the phone, lounging
around, watching TV and surfing the net.
Always put off homework until the day its
due. Make sure the things that dont
matter always come before the things
that do. 6
 Habit #4
Think Win-Lose
See life as a vicious competition. Your
classmate is out to get you so you should
get them first. Dont let anyone else
succeed at anything because if they do that
means you lose. If it looks like youre going
to lose, make sure you drag that sucker
down with you. 7
 Habit #5
Seek First to Talk, Then Pretend to Listen
You were born with a mouth, so use it. Make
sure you talk a lot. Always express your side
of the story first. Once you are sure
everyone understands your views, then
pretend to listen by nodding your head and
saying uh-huh.

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 Habit #6
Dont Cooperate
Lets face it. Other
people are weird because
they are different from
you. So why try to get
along with them?
Teamwork is for the dogs,
Since you always have the
best ideas, you are
better off doing
everything by yourself. 9
 Wear Yourself Out
Be so busy with life that you never take time to renew or
improve yourself. Never study. Dont learn anything new.
Avoid exercise like the plague, and for heaven sakes stay
away from good books, nature or anything else that may
inspire you.
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Our habits will either make us or break
us. We become what we repeatedly do.
As writer Samuel Smiles put it:
Sow a thought, and you reap an act;
Sow an act and you reap a habit;
Sow a habit and you reap a character;
Sow a character and you reap a destiny.

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 7 Habits of Highly
Effective Teens
Habit #1-Be Proactive- Take responsibility for your life.

Habit #2 -Begin with the End in Mind- Define your mission and
goals in life.

Habit #3-Put First Things First- Prioritize and do the most

important things first.

Habit #4-Think Win-Win- Have an everyone-can-win attitude.

Habit #5-Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood-

Listen to people sincerely.

Habit #6-Synergize- Work together to achieve more.

Habit #7-Sharpen the Saw- Renew yourself regularly.

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 THE PRIVATE VICTORY-

HABITS 1,2,&3 deal with SELF-

MASTERY

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 Habit #1
Be Proactive
It pays to be proactive. Proactive people:
-Are not easily offended.
-Take responsibility for their choices.
-Think before they act.
-Bounce back when something bad happens.
-Always find a way to make it happen.
-Focus on things they can do something about and dont
worry about things they cant.

We can control only one thing-how we

respond to what happens to us. 14
 Habit #2
Begin with the end in mind- Control your own
destiny or someone else will.

The paths you choose now

can affect you forever.
If you dont decide your
own future, someone else
will do it for you.

A personal mission statement.

A personal mission statement is like a personal motto that
states what your life is about. It is like the blueprint to your
life.
Go for the Goal.
Once you have your mission in place, you should set goals. Goals
are more specific than a mission statement, and can help you
break down your mission statement into bite size pieces. 15
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 Put First Things First-
Manage your time wisely.
Overcome the fear and
pressure that keeps you from
dealing with your top
priorities.
Never let your fears make
your decisions.
Edmund Hillary, the first
person to climb Mt. Everest,
said, Its not the mountain
we conquer, but ourselves.

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 The Time Quadrants
The Procrastinator The Prioritizer
Exam tomorrow Planning, goal setting
Late for work Essay due in a week
Project due today Exercise
Relaxation

The Yes-Man The Slacker

Unimportant calls Too much TV
Interruptions Or video games
Peer pressure Endless phone calls
Time wasters
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 THE PUBLIC VICTORY- HABITS 4,5,& 6
The concepts dealing with habits 4, 5, and 6 revolve
around relationships and making them work.
Remember, the key to mastering relationships is to first
master yourself. What is the most important ingredient
in a relationship?
Writer Ralph Waldo Emerson said, Who you are
speaks so loudly I cant hear what you are saying. If
you are struggling in your relationships with friends,
parents, teachers, take a strong look at yourself.
The private victory helped you to take responsibility
for yourself and helped you to understand that you
create your own destiny. The public victory helps you
realize that you are a team player and that cooperation
is essential for success. Your ability to get along with
others will largely determine how successful you are in
your career and your level of personal happiness.
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 Habit 4
Think Win-Win- Assertive people- This is
like an endless buffet. The more giving you
are, the more that comes back to you.
Win-Win is an attitude toward life, a
mental frame of mind that says I can win,
and so can you. Its not me or you; it is
both of us. It is the foundation for getting
along well with other people. It begins
with the belief that we are all equal, and
that no one is inferior or superior to
anyone else, and no one really needs to be.
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 Life Attitudes
Win-Lose These people achieve what they want at the expense of
others. C.S. Lewis wrote Pride gets no pleasure out of having
something, only out of having more of it than the next man.

Lose-Win-People with a lose-win mindset are easily intimidated and

readily give in or go along with others: they fail to assert their own
thoughts and feelings.

Lose-Lose- People with this model, approach differences with fear.

They avoid conflicts, which therefore cannot be resolved, and
everybody loses. If Im going down, you are going down with me.
Examples: War, possessive relationships.

Win-Win- These people believe that everyone can win; there is more
than enough to go around for everyone, when each persons needs and
interests are understood and respected. Its possible to find a solution
that benefits and considers everyone.

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 Habit #5

Seek First to Understand, Then To Be

Understood- Try to understand
someone elses point of view before
sharing your own and a whole new
world will be open up to you. Take
the time to listen without judging
or giving advice.

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 Please Listen
When I ask you to listen to me and you start
giving me advice, you have not done what I
have asked. When I ask you to listen to me
and you begin to tell me why I shouldnt
feel that way, you are trampling on my
feelings. When I ask you to listen to me and
you feel you have to do something to solve
my problem, you have failed me, strange as
that may seem. Listen! All I ask is that you
listen. Dont talk or do-just hear me.
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 These are five poor listening
styles:
Spacing out- acting out of it-ignoring
Pretend listening- saying yeah, uh-huh, cool but not
really being genuine
Selective listening -paying attention to only part of the
conversation
Word listening- listening to only words and not the
meaning or the body language associated with it.
Self-centered listening -listening to see things from our
own point of view- I know just how you feel. Oh,
thats nothing, listen to this one. Judging, probing,
and advising are three methods of self-centered
listening.

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 Habit #6
Synergize
When two or more people work together to create a better solution
than either one could alone.
Examples: A good band;
a bird eating bugs off the back of a cow
We must recognize that people view the world from their own point of
view. We have different styles, traits, and characteristics.

Synergy Action Plan

Define the problem or opportunity-
Their Way-Seek first to understand the ideas of others
My Way-Seek to be understood by sharing your ideas
Brainstorm-Create new options and ideas 25
High Way-Find the best solution
 Habit #7
Sharpen the Saw-Its ME time
This is the time when you renew the four key dimensions of
your life-your body, brain, heart, and soul.

The four dimensions

Physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual

We must stay in a healthy balance

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Get control of your life.
Improve your relationships with
your friends.
Make smarter decisions.
Get along with your parents.
Define your values and what
matters most to you.
Get more done in less time.
Increase your self-confidence.
Find balance between school, work,
friends, and everything else.