Sexuality in Married Couples

Samantha Maroff
Marriage & Family
SOC 210
 There are a few theories when picking a
partner, the equity theory, filter theory and
homogamy
EQUITY THEORY: an intimate relationship
is satisfying and stable if both partners see
it as equitable and mutually beneficial
FILTER THEORY: sifting eligible people
according to specific criteria and narrowing
the pool of potential partners to a small
number of candidates
HOMOGAMY: refers to dating or marrying
someone with similar backgrounds that we
have
 Dating is a part of our human mating process where two people meet
socially beyond friendship and become intimate that may end in
marriage
The average couple dates over three and half years before getting
engaged
 To have a happy marriage, both
partners need to have love,
companionship, commitment,
compatibility, flexibility, positive
attitude, communication, conflict
resolution, and emotional support
Not all marriage end in happiness
though, survey says that 40-50% end
in divorce while 50-60% stay
together and do so happily
 About 97% of Americans engage in sex
before marriage
About 3% of Americans wait until
marriage to engage in sex
Statistics show that women wait more than
men to engage in sex, about 60% of women
and 40% of men
From 1954-1963 only 11% wait until
marriage to have sex and from 1994-2003
only 3% wait until marriage
 Couples engage in sex for:
Pleasure
Procreation
Celebrate occasions
Feel closer to their partner
Increase intimacy
Expression of love and affection
 People always joke that your sex life
vanishes when you get married, but is this
true?
Most married couples report being happy
with their sex lives, their sexual intimacy
may decline because of lack of time, but
their satisfaction is higher. 80% of men
report being very happy with their sex lives
while 60% of women do
Many married couples have a happier sex
life after many years because they are more
 Many married couples continue to engage in sexual intercourse,
even into their 70s and 80s
As long as both partners are healthy, they can have a happy sex
life
Their sexual appetite and activity decreases over time but it does
 A survey of American males
and females ages 25 to 44 years
who engage in different types of
sexual contact
There are four different
categories:
Vaginal intercourse
Anal sex with opposite sex
Oral sex with opposite sex
Same-sex contact
 Surveys have shown that
men have had more sex
partners than women
The highest percentage
for men is five to ten sex
partners
The highest percentage
for women is two to four
sex partners
 The most common sexual positions for
married couples are:
Missionary
this position provides intimate face
to face connection
Doggy Style
this position is also the favorite
position of people who have cheated
Cowgirl
Reverse Cowgirl
Lazy dog (spooning)
 Women like to get creative: 83% of women are
open to role playing with their husbands, they
are more willing to dress up in sexy lingerie.
81% of women are open to using sex toys and
75% are open to watching porn with their
husbands
Womens number one fantasy: the most popular
fantasy women reported was having sex in
public. The close second is having group sex
Married couples lead to better sex: married
women and men are more open to try new sexual
things
 52% of women and 49% of men agree that they
had hotter sex before children
8% of women and 22% of men say sex actually
got better after children
Surveys show that the highest percentage of
married couples have sex once a week (24%) and
the lowest percentage of married couples have
sex once a year (0.5%)
Surveys show that 81% of married couples have
not been caught by their children, 16% say yes
but the children did not know what they were
doing and 1% say yes and they knew exactly
what they were doing
 Surveys show the highest
percentage of women say they have
sex occasionally during pregnancy
(36%) while the survey shows the
lowest percentage say their
partners did not want too (4%)
There is some evidence that
pregnant women get an increase in
libido in the second trimester. 43%
of women claim they did not notice
any increase at any particular
stage, while 11% say they did not
like having sex at all while
Benokraitis, N.V. (2014). Marriages and Families (8th Edition). New York: Pearson
Lets Talk about sex (after kids): Survey Results (Netmums)
http://www.netmums.com/woman/sex-and-relationships/the-mama-sutra-let-s-talk-about-
sex/lets-talk-about-sex-after-kids-survey-results
Good, bad, and dirty: The iVillage 2013 married sex survey (TODAY.com)
http://www.today.com/health/ivillage-2013-married-sex-survey-results-1D80245229
4 Cool Statistics About Abstinence in the USA (WTMorg Social network and dating site for
those who wait 4 Cool Statistics About Abstinence in the USA Comments)
http://waitingtillmarriage.org/4-cool-statistics-about-abstinence-in-the-usa/
Women Are Dating Longer Before Getting Engaged
http://www.bridebox.com/blog/couples-date-before-engagement/