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THE SEVEN HABITS OF HIGHLY EFFECTIVE PEOPLE

CHARACTER ETHIC
(1776 - 1930)
Basic principles of effective living, true success and enduring happiness governs human effectiveness
PRINCIPLES/ THOUGHTS SUCCESS ACTION BASED ON BALANCE

SLOW CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT

HABITS OF EFFECTIVENESS

PERSONALITY ETHIC
(1930 ONWARDS)
Function of personality, attitude, behavior, skills and techniques
MANIPULATIVE SKILLS & INFLUENCING TECHNIQUES
SUCCESS ACTION TO GET WHAT WE WANT FROM OTHERS

QUICK CAREER DEVELOPMENT

PUBLIC IMAGE

Stephen and Sandras experience Realization of getting social mileage out of their sons behavior Saw their son in terms of his own uniqueness, stopped trying to clone him

PARADIGM
The way we see the world in terms of perceiving, understanding, interpreting We interpret everything we experience through mental maps
Maps of the way things are Maps of the way things should be
Case on Old Woman and Young Woman

We see the world, not as it is, but as we are Paradigm shifts move us from one way of seeing the world to another
Subway incident

Lighthouse incident

INSIDE-OUT
Start first with self Start with the most inside part of your self
Your paradigms, your character, your motives

WHAT ARE HABITS?


Intersection of knowledge, skill and desire

KNOWLEDGE

HABITS
ATTITUDE

SKILLS

Example: Need to listen

MATURITY CONTINUUM
Dependence You take care of me You come through for me I blame you for the results Independence I can do it I am responsible I am self-reliant I can choose Interdependence We can do it We can cooperate We can create something greater together

MATURITY CONTINUUM
INTERDEPENDENCE
UNDERSTAND FIRST THEN BE UNDERSTOOD PUBLIC 5 SYNERGIZE 6

VICTORY
THINK WIN / WIN
4

INDEPENDENCE
3 DO WHAT IS IMPORTANT BE PROACTIVE 1

PRIVATE VICTORY

PERSONAL MISSION 2

DEPENDENCE

THE SEVEN HABITS-AN OVERVIEW


The Seven Habits lead us through the stages of maturity to Interdependence The Seven Habits are an orderly sequence of growth. They represent, first, a Private Victory, and second, a Public Victory. The habits form a continuum because the Private Victory precedes the Public Victory. Until we have developed self-mastery, it is difficult, if not impossible, to achieve success with others. Together, the Seven Habits cultivate personal character, which is the foundation of effectiveness.

THE SEVEN HABITS


1. 2. 3. 4. BE PROACTIVE BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST THINK WIN-WIN

5.
6.

SEEK FIRST TO UNDERSTAND


SYNERGIZE

7.

SHARPEN YOUR SAW

THE SEVEN HABITS-AN OVERVIEW


Habits 1, 2 and 3 lead to Private Victories, the victories that allow us to achieve self-mastery and dominion over self. We develop self-mastery and self-discipline. This acts as a foundation of good relationship with others. * Habit 1 is Be Proactive, in which we recognize that we are free to choose.

Habit 2 is Begin with the End in Mind, in which we identify our personal mission and goals.
Habit 3 is Put First Things First, in which we act on our priorities.

THE SEVEN HABITS-AN OVERVIEW


Habits 4,5 and 6 lead to Public Victories that allow us to achieve success with others. * * * Habit 4 is Think Win-Win, in which we look for alternatives that allow everyone to win. Habit 5 is Seek First to Understand, which is both an attitude and a skill of listening deeply for complete understanding. Habit 6 is Synergize, in which we discover a creativity that people can experience when they explore their differences together.

Habit 7 is Sharpen the Saw, is the habit that cultivates the others. It is simply daily activities that implement. the principles of effectiveness in our lives

WHAT YOU CAN EXPECT?


No one can persuade another to change. Each of us guards a gate of change that can only be opened from the inside. Opening gate of change to first three habits
Increased self-confidence Knowledge of oneself in a deeper, more meaningful way Define oneself from within, rather than be peoples opinions or by comparisons to others

Opening gate of change to next three habits


Desire and resources to heal and rebuild important relationships
Improvement in good relationships

Internalization of seventh habit


Renew the first six habits True independence and capability of effective interdependence

PARADIGMS OF INTERDEPENCE
Independence is an achievement. Interdependence is a choice only independent people can make. As we become independent We become proactive, value driven and are able to organize and execute around the priorities in life with integrity We then can choose to become interdependent and become capable of building rich, enduring, highly productive relationships with other people.

HABIT:1 BE PROACTIVE
LIFT YOURSELF UP BY YOUR OWN EFFORTS. DONT ALLOW YOURSELF TO FALL DOWN OR TO BE DEGRADED BECAUSE YOU ALONE ARE YOUR FRIEND SO CAN BE YOUR ENEMY.

BHAGVAD GITA

HABIT:1 BE PROACTIVE
BE PROACTIVE = POWER TO CHOOSE OUR OWN RESPONSE

REACTIVE MODEL - CIRCUMSTANCES CONTROL US OTHERS ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR * WHO WE ARE * WHAT WE HAVE * WHAT WE DO

PROACTIVE MODEL

WE CONTROL CIRCUMSTANCES BY USING STRONG VALUES AS GUIDE


WE ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR * * WHO WE ARE WHAT WE HAVE

WHAT WE DO

HABIT:1 BE PROACTIVE
E L C R I C
CIRCLE OF INFLUENCE

O F

C O N C E R N

The Circle of Concern is filled with the haves If I could have more time to myself

The Circle of Influence is filled with the bes I can be more patient, be wise, be loving.

HABIT:1 BE PROACTIVE
Focus on Outer Circle (Blame others, not in our control). Focus on Inner Circle (In our control)

REACTIVE
CIRCLE OF INFLUENCE CIRCLE OF CONCERN

PROACTIVE

HABIT:2 BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND


SOME DONT START FOR FEAR OF OBSTACLES THOUGH THEY HAVE GOAL IN MIND AND DESIRE TO REACH IT. SOME START BUT ON THE WAY THEY SURRENDER TO OBSTACLES AND BLAME THEM. HIGH THINKING INDIVIDUALS DO NOT DEVIATE FROM THE GOAL, INSPITE OF TREMENDOUS DIFFICULTIES, UNTIL THEY HAVE REACHED THEIR GOAL.

NITISHATAK-BHARTRAHARI.

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HABIT:2 BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND


What it means?

Begin today with the image, picture, or paradigm of the end of your life as
your frame of reference It means to know where you are going so that you better understand where you are now and so that the steps you are taking are always in the right direction

Make certain that each day of your life contributes in a meaningful way to the vision you have of your life as a whole

HABIT:2 BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND


Personal Mission Statement
The most effective way is to develop a personal mission statement. It focuses on what you want to be and to do and on the values and principles upon which being and doing are based
It addresses questions like the following: 1. 2. 3. What is my life about? What do I value? What do I treasure?

4. What is really important? A personal mission statement becomes a personal constitution, the basis for making major, life-directing decisions. It forces you to think through your priorities deeply, carefully and to align your behavior with your beliefs

HABIT:2 BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND


Your Key Roles And Goals
You may find that your mission statement will be much more balanced, much easier to work with, if you break it down into the specific role areas of your life and the goals you want to accomplish in each area.

Identify the key roles you have in your life. Think of them in terms of your mission statement. As you identify your key roles, ask yourself the following questions: Are my roles in harmony with my mission statement? Why or why not? What can I do to make my roles and mission more congruent? Describing roles as Work, Personal, or Community are too general. Be specific.

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HABIT:2 BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND


For each role, identify long-term, intermediate, or short-term goals Identify a target date for when you plan to achieve each of them. Your goals should determine the results you achieve in each of your role responsibilities. Make your goals challenging yet achievable. Begin at the the very center of your Circle of Influence By centering your lives on timeless, unchanging principles, you can create a fundamental paradigm of effective living and you stand apart from the emotion of the situation and evaluate all options Eg. Planned to go for a movie with your wife

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HABIT:2 BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND


Sample Personal Mission Statement
I value lifes experiences and seek to learn and grow from each one. In my daily endeavor, I avoid neither risk nor responsibility; nor do I fear failure, only lost opportunity.
I am a responsible spouse and parent. I value differences and view them as strengths. I seek to build complementary win-win relationships with family, friends, and business associates. I act with courage, consideration, and discretion. I prefer to let my works speak for me. In planning my weeks and days, I focus on key roles and goals to maintain balance and perspective. I value my personal freedom of choice and my rights to exercise that freedom. I am more a product of my decisions than my conditions. I do not allow present circumstances or past conditioning to determine my responses to the challenges I face.
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HABIT:3 PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST


THINGS WHICH MATTER MOST MUST NEVER BE AT THE MERCY OF THINGS WHICH MATTER LEAST

GOETHE

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HABIT:3 PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST


The Power of Independent Will
Ability to make decisions and choices and to act in accordance with them, ability to organise and execute around priorities
Urgent Activity which requires immediate attention Important Activity which has to do with results. It contributes to your mission, your values, your high priority goals

HABIT:3 PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST


Move to Quadrant II
To say yes to important Quadrant II priorities, you have to learn to say no to other activities, sometimes apparently urgent things

URGENT
IMPORTANT

NON - URGENT
2. PREVENTION PROCESS FOCUS PLANNING RELATIONSHIP 4. SOME MAIL SOME PHONE CALLS PROCRASTINATION ESCAPE READING /TV

1.
CRISIS PRESSING PROBLEMS FIRE FIGHTING

IMPORTANT

NOT

3. INTERRUPTION SOME CALLS MAIL, REPORTS, MEETINGS

HABIT:3 PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST


To spend more time in Quadrant II, you should organize your life on a weekly basis. The key is not to prioritize what is on your schedule, but to schedule your priorities. You have to empower yourself to see through the lens of importance rather than urgency
Plan Your Day
Plan Your Week Goals

Key roles

Personal Mission

HABIT:3 PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST


Delegation
If we delegate to other people, we think effectiveness. Gofer delegation Dont know how to set up a full delegation so that another person is committed to achieve results. Because they are focused on methods, they become responsible for the results Go for this, go for that, do this, do that, and tell me when it is done Stewardship delegation Focused on results instead of methods. Gives people a choice of method and makes them responsible for the results Involves clear, up-front mutual understanding and commitment regarding expectations

HABIT:3 PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST


Five Elements of Stewardship Delegation
What is the task or project? ______________________________________________________ Person other than yourself involved (person being delegated to or person delegating): ____________________________________________ What are the desired results ? What are the guidelines ? What resources are available? How will performance be measured? When will progress reports be given? What are the consequences for accomplishing (or not accomplishing) the desired results within the terms of the Stewardship Delegation? Actions you can now take to establish clear delegation with the other person

1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6.

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THE EMOTIONAL BANK ACCOUNT


Describes the amount of trust that has been built up in a relationship through courtesy, kindness, honesty, and keeping commitments. It is the feeling of safeness that you have with another human being. When the trust account is high, communication is easy, instant and effective

THE EMOTIONAL BANK ACCOUNT


Six Major Deposits
Understanding the Individual Attending to the Little Things Keeping Commitments

Clarifying Expectations
Showing Personal Integrity Apologizing sincerely when you make a withdrawal

The key is to make deposits-constant deposits of unconditional love

THE EMOTIONAL BANK ACCOUNT


Understanding the individual Understand them deeply as individuals, the way you would want to be understood Do unto others as you would have others do unto you

Attending to the Little Things In relationships, little things are big things. Little kindnesses and courtesies are very important. Small discourtesies, little unkindnesses make large withdrawals

Keeping Commitments
Keeping a commitment or a promise is a major deposit Breaking once is a major withdrawal. The next time a promise is made, they wont believe it.

THE EMOTIONAL BANK ACCOUNT


Clarifying Expectations Invest time and effort to make expectations clear and explicit in the beginning. This saves great amount of time and effort down the road

Showing Personal Integrity


There can be no friendship without confidence, and no confidence without integrity

Integrity includes but goes beyond honesty. Honesty is telling the truth. Integrity is keeping promises and fulfilling expectations. One of the most important ways to manifest integrity is to be loyal to those who are not present. In doing so, you build the trust of those who are present.

THE EMOTIONAL BANK ACCOUNT


Apologizing sincerely when you make a withdrawal When we make withdrawals from the Emotional Bank Account, we need to apologize and we need to do it sincerely. A person must possess himself and have a deep sense of security in fundamental principles and values in order to genuinely apologize

The key is to make deposits-constant deposits of unconditional love

HABIT:4 THINK WIN/WIN


LET ALL YOUR POSSESSION BE USED FOR THE WELFARE OF SOCIETY AND YOU ENJOY THE REMAINING PART OF IT. THOSE WHO USE ALL THEIR WEALTH FOR THEMSELVES - THIS FORM OF ENJOYMENT IS NOTHING BUT SIN BHAGAVAD GITA

LEVEL OF THE RIVER DOES NOT RECEED BY DRINKING OF THIRSTY BIRDS. SHARING THE WEALTH DOES NOT LESSEN YOUR WEALTH KABIR

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HABIT:4 THINK WIN/WIN


The moment you step from independence into interdependence in any capacity, you step into a leadership role. You are in a position of influencing other people. And the habit of effective interpersonal leadership is Think Win/Win Public victory does not mean victory over other people. It means success in effective interaction that brings mutually beneficial results to everyone involved. It means working together, making things happen together that even the same people couldnt make happen by working independently

HABIT:4 THINK WIN/WIN


Six Paradigms of Human Interaction
WIN - WIN

WIN - LOSE
LOSE - WIN LOSE - LOSE

THINK WIN
WIN - WIN OR NO DEAL

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HABIT:4 THINK WIN/WIN


Win/Win Sees life as a cooperative, not a competitive arena. Based on the paradigm that there is plenty for everybody, and that one persons success is not achieved at the expense or exclusion of the success of others. Win/Lose If I win, you lose I get my way, you dont get yours-Hence dysfunctional to cooperation Prone to using power, credentials, etc to get their way Lose/Win I lose, you win Have little courage to express their own feelings or convictions Quick to please or appease others,

HABIT:4 THINK WIN/WIN


Lose/Lose When 2 Win/Lose people get together, they become blind to everything except for their desire for the other person to lose, even if it means losing themselves Highly dependent person-If nobody ever wins, perhaps being a loser isnt so bad
Win A person thinks in terms of securing his own ends and leaving it to others to secure theirs Win/Win or No Deal If we cant find a solution that would benefit us both, we agree to disagree agreeably-Hence No Deal

HABIT:4 THINK WIN/WIN


Character
The more genuine your character, the higher your level of proactivity, the more committed you really are to Win/Win. There are 3 character traits essential to the Win/Win paradigm: Integrity Keeping promises and fulfilling expectations. Making and keeping commitments to ourselves as well as others Maturity Courage balanced with consideration

Courage to express your feelings and convictions, and also to balance this courage with consideration for the feelings and convictions of others.
Abundance Mentality There is plenty out there for everybody and enough to spare for everybody to please and appease.

HABIT:4 THINK WIN/WIN


Character
If we are very high courage and low on consideration,our natural response will be to think win-lose, to get what we want. If we are high on consideration and low on courage, our natural response will be to think lose win, to be popular, to please and appease.
Low High Consideration L/W W/W Courage High

L/L

W/L

Low

HABIT:4 THINK WIN/WIN


Relationships
The trust, the Emotional Bank Account, is the essence of Win/Win. Without trust, the best we can do is compromise Without trust, we lack the credibility for open, mutual learning and communication and real creativity

HABIT:5 SEEK FIRST TO UNDERSTAND, THEN TO BE UNDERSTOOD


THE HEART HAS ITS REASONS WHICH REASON KNOWS NOT OF

PASCAL

HABIT:5 SEEK FIRST TO UNDERSTAND, THEN TO BE UNDERSTOOD


Obstacles to Understanding-Autobiographical Response
Evaluating We either agree or disagree

Probing

We ask questions from our own frame of reference

Advising We give counsel based on our own experience

Interpreting
We try to figure people out, to explain their motives, their behavior, based on our own motives and behavior

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HABIT:5 SEEK FIRST TO UNDERSTAND, THEN TO BE UNDERSTOOD


We typically seek first to be understood Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply

Empathic Listening EMPATHY = HEART LISTENING WITH THE EYES AND

To listen with empathy, is to let the person get to the problem and the solution at his own pace and time People want to be understood. Henceforth Empathic listening is the key to making deposits in Emotional Bank Accounts

HABIT:5 SEEK FIRST TO UNDERSTAND, THEN TO BE UNDERSTOOD


Empathic Listening

You get inside another persons frame of reference You look out through it You see the world they see the world You understand their paradigm You understand how they feel You listen with your ears, but you also, and more importantly, listen with your eyes and with your heart You listen for feeling, for meaning You listen for behavior You sense, you intuit, you feel.

HABIT:5 SEEK FIRST TO UNDERSTAND, THEN TO BE UNDERSTOOD


HABIT OF COMMUNICATION

CONSIDERATION
UNDERSTAND FIRST

COURAGE
THEN BE UNDERSTOOD

HABIT:5 SEEK FIRST TO UNDERSTAND, THEN TO BE UNDERSTOOD


One to One
When you really listen, you become influenceable And becoming influenceable is the key to influence others Spend time with your children now, one to one Listen to them; understand them

The time you invest to deeply understand the people you love brings tremendous dividends to open communication

HABIT:6 SYNERGIZE
HOWEVER POWERFUL AND STRONG A MAN MAY BE HE CANT SUCCEED IN HIS EFFORTS IF HE HAS NO ASSOCIATES TO COLLABORATE. EVEN FIRE IN AN OPEN PLACE WILL EXTINGUISH IF IT HAS NO WIND TO FAN IT.

PANCHATANTRA 500 B.C.

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HABIT:6 SYNERGIZE

1+1=...

Whole is greater than the sum of its parts

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HABIT:6 SYNERGIZE
Open your mind and heart and expressions to new possibilities, new alternatives, new options. Example: Brainstorming

Levels of Communication
High Synergistic (Win/Win) TRUST Respectful (Compromise) Defensive (Win/Lose or Lose/Win) Low Low COOPERATION High

HABIT:6 SYNERGIZE
The essence of synergy is to value the differences.

And the key to valuing those differences is to realize that all people see the world, not as it is, but as they are.
Good! You see it differently! Help me see what you see

In an interdependent situation, synergy is particularly powerful in unfreezing negative forces and creating new insights that actually transform those restraining forces into driving ones

HABIT:6 SYNERGIZE
The Third Alternative
Think Win/Win, believe in a third alternative, a solution that is mutually beneficial and is better than what either of them originally proposed Combination of High Emotional Account, thinking Win/Win, and seeking first to understand creates the ideal environment for synergy Instead of transaction, it is a transformation

HABIT:7 SHARPEN THE SAW


GET UP EARLY MORNING AND THINK OF FUTURE PROGRAMS REGARDING YOUR DUTIES, OBLIGATIONS AND ECONOMICS; PHYSICAL DISORDER AND THEIR ROOT CAUSES AND THE ESSENCE OF KNOWLEDGE.

MANUSMRUTI

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HABIT:7 SHARPEN THE SAW


Habit 7 is to do with preserving and enhancing the greatest asset you have-you. It is renewing the 4 dimensions of your nature-physical, spiritual, mental and social/emotional - To do this, you must be proactive

Four Dimensions of Renewal


Physical Care effectively for your physical body Eat the right kind of foods Get sufficient rest and relaxation Exercise on a regular basis Spiritual Have a deep understanding of your purpose Review and recommit to it frequently

HABIT:7 SHARPEN THE SAW


Four Dimensions of Renewal
Mental Inform and expand your mind on a regular basis Get into the habit of reading good literature Write good letters, keep a journal of your thoughts Begin with the end in mind and mentally organize to establish that end
Socio/Economic Dimension Focus on Habits 4, 5 & 6-centered on the principles of interpersonal leadership, empathic communication, and creative cooperation. Do it in your normal everyday interactions with other people

HABIT:7 SHARPEN THE SAW


Synergy in Renewal
The things that you do to sharpen the saw in one dimension have positive impact on other dimensions: The more proactive you are (Habit 1), the more effectively you can exercise personal leadership (Habit 2) and management in your life (Habit 3) The more effectively you manage your life (Habit 3), the more Quadrant II renewing activities you can do (Habit 7) The more you first seek to understand (Habit 5), the more effectively you can go for synergetic Win/Win solutions. The more you improve in any one of the habits that lead to independence, the more effective you will be in interdependent situations. And renewal is the process of renewing all the habits

HABIT:7 SHARPEN THE SAW


The Upward Spiral
To keep progressing, you must learn, commit, and do and learn, commit, and do again

SEVEN SOURCES OF INTRINSIC SECURITY


Personal integrity - Make your deeds follow your words. Keep your actions in line with your values. Keep your commitments to self and others, and speak the truth. A rich private life - Fill your thoughts with value, through hobbies, music, meditation, literature, and other activities that add quality and excellence of life. Nature - The beauty of nature, its aliveness, its awe-inspiring grandeur - all have a performance and an eternal quality that, when transplanted into our mind through association, become a source of security and strength. Education - Education gives you both subject matter knowledge and the skills and discipline of learning.

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SEVEN SOURCES OF INTRINSIC SECURITY


Service - Acts of service, particularly anonymous acts, transform people by turning their awareness outward. Family - Your family is part of your natural context. It includes immediate family and your extended family as well - aunts and uncles, cousins, in-laws, and so on. You cannot honor your family without nurturing your own senseof personal value and honor. Sharpening the saw - This is your hour of Daily Private Victory, your program for building self-worth. Personal self-worth is an inseparable part of our nature. If your sense of personal value has dimmed, these Seven Sources of Intrinsic Security, along with the entire Seven Habits program, will help it shine brighter. __________________________________________________________________
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YOUR POWER TO BE
Your greatest power is your power to be.. To be more loving.. To be more courageous.. To be more joyous.. To be more friendly.. To be more sensitive.. To be more aware.. To be more forgiving.. To be more tolerant.. To be more humble.. To be more patient.. To be more helpful.. To be a greater human being. You only achieve identity by being the best whatever you have it in you to be, by giving full expression to your own unique spirit, to your own ideals and values, to your own gifts and talents, to your own concepts of beauty and truth. Your power to be finds fulfillment as you relate to others. Giving of the self enlarges the self, helps you to be more. What you become, through your power to be, is mirrored in the eyes of others as the man you are. To be more is the supreme adventure of being.

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